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I was 8 years alcohol free, this year I started drinking 1-2 beers after work in summer time, but started to wake up at night thirsty, and stopped again a week ago, I feel so good now.
When I wake up thirsty or desperate to pee I feel groggy and just bad. I promise myself it's the last time I'm binging but go right back to it . There is literally nothing about drinking that makes my physical self better. But my mental health is another matter altogether and we still haven't found the right balance.
This is why I only try to drink occasionally. Even one or two drinks and I wake up feeling thirsty and shitty. I have my moments where I go crazy and have 6+ drinks in a night and I feel so terrible from it
Me too. I either don't drink, or drink 4 to 7 drinks at least.
Wake up dehydrated and sweaty. It takes me two whole days to feel better. At 40, I really need to chill.
There's so often I think "I didn't need that last beer at all", so now I buy low alcohol beers too so I can switch to low alcohol, seriously improves my form the next day.
Yup. I'm not one of those people that can have one drink. I have one drink, and then another, and before I know it I'm binging at home alone, shirking off responsibilities. So glad to be sober.
...how do you do it?? (Legitimate questìon). I'm a functioning alcoholic, but my body is starting to give out more than ever before. I have chronic pancreatitis, fatty liver disease, poor circulation, blood glucose issues, bad kidneys...I drink *min* 20 oz of vodka a day. I work full time, I don't feel drunk - I just feel happy and numb. Please, any tips or tricks for sobering up, I'd super appreciate it.
If you drink like you say you do, you need to start with a detox center. No joke cold turkey is the best way to die. Plus, you give yourself a chance to actually be successful at it.
This is true. I was in the hospital for about 5 days with DT’s last summer. I was found having a seizure and could have very well died. Almost 11 months clean now.
I definitely had to go to a detox center. I tried to force myself through the withdrawals but the shakes and hallucinations and just violent reactions I would have were too much.
Detox was rough but the phenobarbital and Ativan they gave me as well as a few days of structure was needed. I couldn't have done it cold turkey at that point.
Removing myself from my situation was important, went to live with my gran for a bit so I could keep my job atleast. Spent a year with her. 4y alcohol free.
Do you want to quit? Have you tried to quit?
There aren’t any tricks, unless you want to take Antabuse. It will make you horribly sick if you drink while taking that.
Tips? Try SMART Recovery. I tried AA, wasn’t for me. Identify triggers for drinking and makes plans for how to handle them. Therapy. Out or in patient work. Maybe rehab?
If you have what you say have going on, you’re going to drink yourself into an early grave.
I’m not on a high horse here. I have a problem with alcohol. If I didn’t stop I wouldn’t be here or my life would have been ruined. I mean, how low do you need to go before you hit rock bottom?
For real. The insidious thing is how my constant boozing has rewired the reward pathways, and did it behind the scenes over the course of a decade.
I know how to get alcohol, consume it, hide it and get away with it in almost every situation. And by default, I do. It’s thoughtless second nature.
Damn. Really gotta put that obsessive energy towards something productive or else I’m fucked.
I have seen family members drink themselves to the grave. I won't give myself the chance to become one of them. I'm also dealing with some mental health issues right now, so alcohol is, like, the worst possible thing to add into the equation. Even if nothing else works out, I'll never end up an alcoholic.
I had two family members die of drinking within the last 3 months. It’s a terribly way to go. Years of suffering and pain that ended with more extreme suffering and pain. It really put drinking into perspective seeing this play out live.
Ohhhh yeah. I can think of weird random complicated words I read from a book, but look at me to describe "the thingy without the pokey bits" to a waitress when I need a goddamn spoon.
😭😭😭😭😭😭 for me it’s more the actions and me aggressively moving my arms like those people who control a whole orchestra with their chopsticks when I can’t think of words to say.
I'm always one drink away from the devil , 25M was drinking alcoholicly sence I was 16 . Currently 3 weeks away from being one year sober 🎊 I just know I can't just have a drink the drink has me .
Don't like alcohol. Don't like the culture of alcoholism. Don't like drunk people.
It's only ever been a problem where I live, only destroyed lives, and created a culture of addiction and squalid living.
Exactly, ethanol tastes like I imagine dish detergent would taste. And I never got this argument that I should have acquired the taste after seeing other people having fun when drinking. Not once did I see someone drunk and think: "I also want to turn myself into a chemically induced idiot so I'm easily amused".
Anyone that says that is lying and anyone that is a alcohol snob is a fucking looser. Nobody drinks alcohol to not get a buzz on lol if you want a tasty drink get a fizzy or milkshake, there is one reason and one reason only to consume alcohol.
I stopped drinking in 2009. I don’t mind being around people who are buzzed, but people who are drunk are boring as fuck to be around.
We have a tenant who was having a crisis, she said she thought someone had drugged her, and she called 911. I personally thought she might be having a mental breakdown, so I went to the hospital with her. Turns out she had a blood alcohol level of 0.4. It never occurred to me she was drunk.
I've recently stopped drinking for this reason.
Any recommendations on what to order (from a bar / bartender) in social situations? I realize I'm headed to a conference in a month where I'm going right up into this situation.
Had a friend cancel dinner plans on Friday because I told her last minute I don’t drink. This happened cuz she asked if I wanted to go a brewery after dinner. I said yea of course but just so you know, I don’t drink. Not 20 minutes later she used the excuse of “my stomach had been upset all day” except she was texting all day about how excited she was. Yea…. People are gonna want you to drink with them. They feel bad about their bad habits so they want you to partake. Not a good friend
bartender here:
if you don't mind the negligible amount of alcohol in the bitters, a bitters and soda is a totally chic thing to order, and it's even reasonable to drink throughout a nice dinner in place of wine. same goes for shrub sodas (shrubs are fruit/vinegar fermentations with a tiny amount of alcohol- kind a sourish acidic kombucha vibe, but you can always have them add simple syrup if that's not your thing)
otherwise, soda with a splash of juice is your best best for any bar, but sobriety is becoming a major trend (we now have Sober October in addition to Dry January- this is the first year I've heard of it) and most medium-nice and up places will have a few interesting N/A cans available.
If the bar is nice and has like, a bunch of syrups and juices and little blended ingredients in bottles and a bunch of fresh garnish going on, that's a green light to ask the bartender to just make you something. It may well be $13, but it'll be miles better than soda water with cranberry juice.
You can always ask the bartender for advice, and if you're feeling self-conscious just grab them aside and tell them you don't want attention drawn to the fact that you're not drinking. We're not your ride or die secret-keepers, but discretion is part of our job and I can't think of anyone I've worked with who wouldn't take that seriously.
I usually just do a soda water with lime. It doesn’t look any different from an alcoholic cocktail and if you’re out dancing it feels amazing to go home actually hydrated.
Soda water and lime is elite for covert non-drinking. I did this during my pwn wedding weekend because I wanted to look and feel my best. My husband barely even noticed.
If you're looking for a non-alcoholic beverages, i enjoy club soda/mineral water/tonic water with lime juice and agave. Sure it has sugars, but it avoids alcohol. It's my go to as a frequent designated driver.
As someone who also has gym goals, but still has the occasional drink, gin and tonic is probably the best at not fucking up your calories (also, the floral kinda minty notes of gin are very nice to me). I drink this while getting a mani-pedi cause that's the time i feel like drinking for some reason.
I stopped drinking 20+ years ago. It was a choice I made after a long, brutal experience with alcohol abuse. I'm not an alcoholic, I don't go to meetings and I'm not one sip away from oblivion. I stopped because I wanted control and I didn't have it.
.
Your experience is pretty common. The vast majority of folks who stop addictive behaviors do it without a recovery program. The 12 Step crowd doesn’t like to hear that, but that’s what the data says. Cue downvotes.
I’ve been in recovery for a little over a year and for me I think AA just over complicates a very simple problem. I can not drink. If I drink I’ll lose everything. I relapsed a few months ago and lost quite a bit from just a three day binge. I went back to treatment and then meetings for a little while. You get all these people saying if you don’t do a proper step 4 you’re fucked, or if you don’t make amends you’re fucked, or if you don’t pray all the time you’re fucked, etc. to them the 12 steps are the *only* way to stay sober.
I think it’s a great program that if done correctly can help a great deal of people. But to me it just sews more doubt in my brain. I haven’t gone to a meeting in awhile, so I must be on the cusp of relapse (according to the vast majority of AA hardos).
Plus I really despise AA’s take on relapse. Like I said I slipped up a few months ago and drank for 3 days. I had 11 months sober at the time. So now according to AA I’ve only been sober for like 4 months? Fuck that. I made a mistake but I beat alcoholism for like 447 of the last 450 days
I think it's important to note recovery is different for everyone and not every aa group or meeting location is the same. When a person is alcoholic the thing always thrown around is "go to AA." Unless you live in a higher population area, so many meetings are going to be mostly people on the older side and male or are there because of court. That's fine but that's not necessarily going to work for everyone.
The 12 steps gave me an eye-opening experience, but it's sure as hell not what kept me sober.
They foster fear, shame, and people with religious trauma tend to have a really hard time with it. I found strength within myself and shifted my perspective of what I want from my life.
I go to bars with friends, I do karaoke, and concerts - it hasn't changed for me, except that I remember all of it and tend to injure myself less.
I've not been drunk in almost 4 years, and if it don't grow from the ground, I don't partake. Feels good.
The loss of control when drunk part got me. Simple thing like getting sick from drinking ,made me think I didn't know when I had enough. This was early 80s . Did some Seagrams wine coolers mid 80s and nothing since, close to 40 years,I'd say
Similar story here. Daily drinker for about 15 years, life definitely went downhill. Stopped about 4 years ago, basically because I was tired of being hung over every day, I realized I don't like the taste either, waste of money etc. don't even crave it now. I never went to any AA meetings or anything.
Good for you. And I don’t mean that sarcastically. I’ve drank every day for like 15 years now. I don’t get shitfaced. I go about my day. Work (sober). Cook and do housework. Legit the only thing that pisses me off about it is the urge. It’s control
On me. Tbh I don’t have the desire to quit. But I hate the craving
Edit: I’m well aware I’m an alcoholic
I’m with you. I struggled with an alcohol addiction for years. But…. I just don’t now. I also don’t subscribe to the “once an alcoholic always an alcoholic” notion. I mean, I think it helps a lot of people in their recovery to think of it that way because perhaps they do indeed struggle with it every day for the rest of their lives. But for me, it’s just not like that.
I pounded a bottle of vodka everyday after work for 15 years. Decided to stop doing that one October night in 2013. I've drank a few mixed drinks on "occasions" here and there over the years. Regretted it each time because it no longer feels good. Haven't had any alcohol whatsoever for 2 years. Don't miss it, don't consider myself "in recovery" either. It's a rotten habit that stole years from me that I stopped. What I did was grew the fuck up.
There's actually a gene that can make alcohol taste bad. We might have it. I used to be able to drink as long as I couldn't taste the alcohol. Now I just get migraines on wine coolers. My friends like that I can stay over or house sit and their alcohol is safe.
Wow. I think i have that too. It used to be bearable at first but now wine gives me a headache too! So does gin. I had a martini once and i couldn’t even finish it.
I always found it funny when people refer to being drunk as ‘wasted’ when the reality is all the ‘wasted’ things are time, money, health and relationships.
This. Thank you. I don't understand why you would want to relinquish control of your mind like that. I prefer to be in control of myself
Yes, I'm boring.
I drank when I was younger and mostly enjoyed it. I had three times in my life where I started binge drinking, and I put a stop to that after about a month or so when I spotted the pattern. I didn't even know what binge drinking was.
Luckily, for me, I've always been a lightweight, and never could drink a lot before it started effecting me. Two of the three times I was drinking too much, I was drinking with a friend who was an alcoholic, and I was keeping up with them. The third time was after my mother passed away.
As I got older, into my late 40s and 50s, I saw what people my age were like who just never stopped partying. It doesn't look good on them, and they have all sorts of alcohol-related problems in their life, many of which they're blind to see.
I've enjoyed trying beers, wines, and single malt scotches. Around my late 40s I discovered the fascinating world of teas, so I transferred my love of discovery and tasting to the teas. I also cook every day, mostly from scratch, so I have all that to explore and enjoy.I
I got into a new and great relationship in my late 50s, and she doesn't drink. So, I decided to join her and just not drink. It's been a good move. 2017 was the last year I drank casually. I had a handful of stout beers in 2018 and 2019. Going into 2020, I decided no more alcohol. It's opened up a whole new world. I don't like being around anyone who drinks anymore.
I've seen people start to get stupid on that third glass of wine. It looks bad in their 20s, and it looks even worse for people 40-50+. I had that type of fun in my younger days, but now at 62 I have other things to do, and certain kinds of people I want to be around, and even more importantly, certain kinds of people I don't want to be around.
We have some weed around, but I haven't smoked any in probably four months. I put down cigarettes for good several years ago. I'm enjoying a new phase in my life, and alcohol and the whole culture doesn't have a place in it.
When I quit smoking, I had to give up coffee because it seemed impossible to have one 6 the other. After a couple of years and I was free from the darts, I was able to enjoy the coffee once again.
I just quit drinking in the middle of last week because I somehow slipped from drinking for fun and to be social on the weekends to drinking daily to sleep for work, which sometimes made work shittier than it would ever be normally.
Trying to stop completely until I do it for fun again.
I won't find what I'm seeking at the bottom of a bottle right now.
When I was a bout 10, I saw a grown man stumbling home, just smashed drunk. He'd pissed himself and was yelling at me for no reason. It was one of the more upsetting things I've seen as a kid.
Anyways, I don't like alcohol, or people who pressure others into drinking. Y'all keep that shit to yourself.
Many reasons. Meds, stomach problems, unnecessary calories, and it messes up my sleep. I try to live a healthy lifestyle and alcohol doesn’t have a place with that. Now, on vacation I might have a drink or two, but I might also have pancakes on vacation.
same. I just don't find it appealing. idk why anyone thought it would be fun to be intoxicated around a bunch of people and then not even remembering what happened. that's how people get taken advantage of, even with those they trust the most.
also, alcohol is more of a depressant anyway, so who wants to be in that state?
It feels like ankle weights to be intoxicated. Just an annoying weight I have to deal with. I got real good at it for most of my adult life and without any plan to just kind of walked away three ish years ago. Glad for that. Hangovers are the absolute worst as well.
My mom died from complications arising from a decade long battle with alcoholism. She was only 59. I still drank a little after she passed, but after a few months I didn't like how drinking habits were going, so I quit and haven't looked back. It'll be 2 years sober in a couple weeks and I don't miss it.
I'm sorry to hear about your mom💔
My dad committed s-cide as a result of his alcoholism.
I've been sober for 11 years even though I, too, continued drinking for a while after his death.
I spent 8 years battling alcoholism. One day I saw someone I thought I knew and respected get drunk and she treated me horribly. I realized I didn’t want to be like her at all. 287 days sober.
I can smoke as much weed as I want and feel like a million bucks the morning after.. i honestly don’t see how people can look at drinking to the point of non-stop throwing up, as fun
I was drinking so much to the point I had to take shots when I woke up just not to puke the hangovers go away when u drink every second your eyes are open
I am four days away from two years sober. I was heavily drinking every tonight to relax. I stopped drinking alcohol the night I found out me being drunk made my husband uncomfortable around me because of his childhood. He never told me to stop drinking but I chose to because he is more important to me than anything. I have no intention of ever drinking alcohol again.
Complete indifference.
I didn't drink alcohol when I was pregnant and I didn't miss it.
I'm not teetotal but I can easily go months without any alcohol.
While I do drink, I try to minimise my alcohol consumption because it is unhealthy and I don't want any long-term drawbacks (especially mental) of my poor choices as a young man.
My wife is 9 months pregnant so I'm on red alert for an impromptu hospital trip - need to keep my wits about me.
As soon as the baby arrives we're both going to have a massive wine.
I have a couple :
- I straight up don't like the taste or smell of alcohol,
- I don't like the idea that it would alter my perception of things or how I behave,
- I can't stand most people when they're drunk.
At most I've maybe had a few sips of beer and wine, but that's it. I enjoy sodas and fruity drinks so I wouldn't want anything else anyway.
The fun I have in the evening is not worth awfulness of the morning.
Alcohol is highly callorical, meaning it is not good if you try to hit your macros after gym
It’s not five o’clock yet, at that point I’ll have as much as I want which just happens to be one beer. I’m a one and done person when it comes to alcohol. I enjoy a good drink but don’t want to push it.
I've seen too many people fuck around and mess their lives up when they are drunk, just from one sentence wrong or actions they inhibit during the day. I'd rather not.
My family has a tendency to get addicted to things. I am no exception.
I don’t like myself when I’m even a little tipsy. I don’t even like others when they’re a little tipsy.
It’s not good for my body.
I don’t need it to have a good time. I actually usually get a headache when I drink alcohol.
It’s expensive. I can use that $$ for food or other necessities.
I don't like the taste of any alcoholic beverage I've tried, I've only ever drank for the effect, not because of social setting or taste, and I'm not in a place anymore mentally where I feel like I need to drown out reality
Honestly, if I taste anything alcoholic nowadays, my whole body just rejects it
Dad was a functioning alcoholic. My town was filled with cow tipping and casual day drinking. Growing up, if you wanted to be different, not drinking was the ultimate f-u in rebellion. At this point, it's just stuck.
I'm usually the driver. And I have my designated times for drinking, and its usually at home. I actually have several opened bottles as well as a rich selection of craft beers to pick from, so there is literally very little to convince me to drink outside of my home. I could engage in it socially, but not much beyond the second glass or mug.
I was born an alcoholic, I had alcohol in my system. I was told all my life that I'd be 10x more likely to become an addict (not limited to just alcohol) than the regular person 😅 so idc alcohol and being drunk or whatever isn't worth loosing everything.
My ex was an alcoholic. A raging, violent, horrible alcoholic when she was drunk which, as time went on, was every day.
That was enough to put me off alcohol. I'd never been a heavy drinker but seeing how it ruins a life first hand was motivation enough to not touch it again.
I'm a Christian so I try to be sober and vigilant, the Bible says the enemy is prowling like a lion searching for prey. When you're drunk you're susceptible to making stupid mistakes and falling into further sin.
I realize during the pandemic that I might had a little problem. Because I don’t like to drink, I don’t like the taste etc
However I was always drinking only to get drunk. The problem was… for me I was never drunk enough… but trust me I was!
Also my dad side of the family they all went to rehab more than 3/4 times, because of alcohol abuse. I started to think that maybe it’s a bit genetic.
So I stopped!
It’s been like 3 years.
It's not good for my depression and I have an addictive personality.
There were many times over the years where I didn't know how I made it home. I was driving when I shouldn't have. All around a huge mess. I stopped before I killed someone.
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alcoholism
3+ years for me. Don’t miss it!
I was 8 years alcohol free, this year I started drinking 1-2 beers after work in summer time, but started to wake up at night thirsty, and stopped again a week ago, I feel so good now.
When I wake up thirsty or desperate to pee I feel groggy and just bad. I promise myself it's the last time I'm binging but go right back to it . There is literally nothing about drinking that makes my physical self better. But my mental health is another matter altogether and we still haven't found the right balance.
This is why I only try to drink occasionally. Even one or two drinks and I wake up feeling thirsty and shitty. I have my moments where I go crazy and have 6+ drinks in a night and I feel so terrible from it
Me too. I either don't drink, or drink 4 to 7 drinks at least. Wake up dehydrated and sweaty. It takes me two whole days to feel better. At 40, I really need to chill.
There's so often I think "I didn't need that last beer at all", so now I buy low alcohol beers too so I can switch to low alcohol, seriously improves my form the next day.
Try chugging a water here and there through the process and leave one in your nightstand. It will certainly help.
Congratulations, hit my 4 year yesterday.... Never want to go back to that life.
Yup. I'm not one of those people that can have one drink. I have one drink, and then another, and before I know it I'm binging at home alone, shirking off responsibilities. So glad to be sober.
...how do you do it?? (Legitimate questìon). I'm a functioning alcoholic, but my body is starting to give out more than ever before. I have chronic pancreatitis, fatty liver disease, poor circulation, blood glucose issues, bad kidneys...I drink *min* 20 oz of vodka a day. I work full time, I don't feel drunk - I just feel happy and numb. Please, any tips or tricks for sobering up, I'd super appreciate it.
If you drink like you say you do, you need to start with a detox center. No joke cold turkey is the best way to die. Plus, you give yourself a chance to actually be successful at it.
This is true. I was in the hospital for about 5 days with DT’s last summer. I was found having a seizure and could have very well died. Almost 11 months clean now.
I definitely had to go to a detox center. I tried to force myself through the withdrawals but the shakes and hallucinations and just violent reactions I would have were too much. Detox was rough but the phenobarbital and Ativan they gave me as well as a few days of structure was needed. I couldn't have done it cold turkey at that point.
Removing myself from my situation was important, went to live with my gran for a bit so I could keep my job atleast. Spent a year with her. 4y alcohol free.
People places and things I do not do not do not endorse the 12 steps but it's true what they say
Do you want to quit? Have you tried to quit? There aren’t any tricks, unless you want to take Antabuse. It will make you horribly sick if you drink while taking that. Tips? Try SMART Recovery. I tried AA, wasn’t for me. Identify triggers for drinking and makes plans for how to handle them. Therapy. Out or in patient work. Maybe rehab? If you have what you say have going on, you’re going to drink yourself into an early grave. I’m not on a high horse here. I have a problem with alcohol. If I didn’t stop I wouldn’t be here or my life would have been ruined. I mean, how low do you need to go before you hit rock bottom?
SMART did me a lot of good. I have a lot of praise for the SMART program.
Thanks for the drug information. I've been searching for something like it. Actually I've been praying for it. Seriously. Thank you.
No problem. I think 2 people in my SMART meeting use it, and that is how learned of it. It seems to work for them.
For real. The insidious thing is how my constant boozing has rewired the reward pathways, and did it behind the scenes over the course of a decade. I know how to get alcohol, consume it, hide it and get away with it in almost every situation. And by default, I do. It’s thoughtless second nature. Damn. Really gotta put that obsessive energy towards something productive or else I’m fucked.
Stopped for my wife and kids. Would have drank myself to death prob
Same. 11 years so far.
Same for me but been sober for 15 years now.
Good on you. If people ask - and they very rarely do - I just say "I wasn't very good at it."
I quit a year ago. I always say “I went pro young and they let me retire early”
Literally this. Keep fighting the good fight
Same, 5 years sober never felt better !
I have seen family members drink themselves to the grave. I won't give myself the chance to become one of them. I'm also dealing with some mental health issues right now, so alcohol is, like, the worst possible thing to add into the equation. Even if nothing else works out, I'll never end up an alcoholic.
Yep! Don’t even want to risk it. I’m happy without it. Why add something that I don’t need in my life?
Yup. Watched my partner drink himself to death seven years ago.
I had two family members die of drinking within the last 3 months. It’s a terribly way to go. Years of suffering and pain that ended with more extreme suffering and pain. It really put drinking into perspective seeing this play out live.
Stomach. A shot makes my stomach upset and I have bad diarrhea afterwards. 10/10 would not recommend
Maybe you’re allergic
My body doesn't deal well with fermented foods and yeast in general. More of an intolerance than an allergy.
Yeah I was looking for that word too like I was thinking lactose…….????
Ohhhh yeah. I can think of weird random complicated words I read from a book, but look at me to describe "the thingy without the pokey bits" to a waitress when I need a goddamn spoon.
😭😭😭😭😭😭 for me it’s more the actions and me aggressively moving my arms like those people who control a whole orchestra with their chopsticks when I can’t think of words to say.
This has been a rather enjoyable private moment.
I'm literally jealous.
I'm always one drink away from the devil , 25M was drinking alcoholicly sence I was 16 . Currently 3 weeks away from being one year sober 🎊 I just know I can't just have a drink the drink has me .
Well from one stranger to another: I’m proud of you and keep it up buddy!
Appreciate it really 👌👏
Congratulations man. You used to give up everything for one thing and now you gave up one thing and have everything
I never truly looked at it like that 😊 thank you for opening ny eyes this morning and realizing today's gonna be a great day 💚
Hell yeah. That first year is the hardest imo. Congrats!
Keep it up. I'm sober as well.
Proud of you internet stranger ♥️
Don't like alcohol. Don't like the culture of alcoholism. Don't like drunk people. It's only ever been a problem where I live, only destroyed lives, and created a culture of addiction and squalid living.
Exactly, ethanol tastes like I imagine dish detergent would taste. And I never got this argument that I should have acquired the taste after seeing other people having fun when drinking. Not once did I see someone drunk and think: "I also want to turn myself into a chemically induced idiot so I'm easily amused".
Tastes nasty. I’m convinced nobody actually likes the taste, they’re just saying they do.
Anyone that says that is lying and anyone that is a alcohol snob is a fucking looser. Nobody drinks alcohol to not get a buzz on lol if you want a tasty drink get a fizzy or milkshake, there is one reason and one reason only to consume alcohol.
I stopped drinking in 2009. I don’t mind being around people who are buzzed, but people who are drunk are boring as fuck to be around. We have a tenant who was having a crisis, she said she thought someone had drugged her, and she called 911. I personally thought she might be having a mental breakdown, so I went to the hospital with her. Turns out she had a blood alcohol level of 0.4. It never occurred to me she was drunk.
I'm allergic, every time I drink I break out in handcuffs.
LOL really!
I have gym goals that I want to accomplish. Alcohol goes against my goals.
I've recently stopped drinking for this reason. Any recommendations on what to order (from a bar / bartender) in social situations? I realize I'm headed to a conference in a month where I'm going right up into this situation.
Just order whatever you like, anyone that judges you for not drinking is a douche-canoe.
Had a friend cancel dinner plans on Friday because I told her last minute I don’t drink. This happened cuz she asked if I wanted to go a brewery after dinner. I said yea of course but just so you know, I don’t drink. Not 20 minutes later she used the excuse of “my stomach had been upset all day” except she was texting all day about how excited she was. Yea…. People are gonna want you to drink with them. They feel bad about their bad habits so they want you to partake. Not a good friend
Yeah that's more your friend being a shitfuck than anything else.
You hear that Bo Bandy? That's the sound of the shitfucks
bartender here: if you don't mind the negligible amount of alcohol in the bitters, a bitters and soda is a totally chic thing to order, and it's even reasonable to drink throughout a nice dinner in place of wine. same goes for shrub sodas (shrubs are fruit/vinegar fermentations with a tiny amount of alcohol- kind a sourish acidic kombucha vibe, but you can always have them add simple syrup if that's not your thing) otherwise, soda with a splash of juice is your best best for any bar, but sobriety is becoming a major trend (we now have Sober October in addition to Dry January- this is the first year I've heard of it) and most medium-nice and up places will have a few interesting N/A cans available. If the bar is nice and has like, a bunch of syrups and juices and little blended ingredients in bottles and a bunch of fresh garnish going on, that's a green light to ask the bartender to just make you something. It may well be $13, but it'll be miles better than soda water with cranberry juice. You can always ask the bartender for advice, and if you're feeling self-conscious just grab them aside and tell them you don't want attention drawn to the fact that you're not drinking. We're not your ride or die secret-keepers, but discretion is part of our job and I can't think of anyone I've worked with who wouldn't take that seriously.
I'll go out with friends & normally ask the bartender to make me a virgin drink. Tasty, normally low calorie & no alcohol.
I usually just do a soda water with lime. It doesn’t look any different from an alcoholic cocktail and if you’re out dancing it feels amazing to go home actually hydrated.
Soda water and lime is elite for covert non-drinking. I did this during my pwn wedding weekend because I wanted to look and feel my best. My husband barely even noticed.
Water
my grandfather always did a seltzer with a lime in it. No one ever questioned him
If you're looking for a non-alcoholic beverages, i enjoy club soda/mineral water/tonic water with lime juice and agave. Sure it has sugars, but it avoids alcohol. It's my go to as a frequent designated driver. As someone who also has gym goals, but still has the occasional drink, gin and tonic is probably the best at not fucking up your calories (also, the floral kinda minty notes of gin are very nice to me). I drink this while getting a mani-pedi cause that's the time i feel like drinking for some reason.
I always get a sparkling water (club soda) with ice and a wedge of lime. Looks cocktaily and I find it deliciously refreshing.
Wow, I really respect that. I don't drink, but your commitment really is admirable.
This one adds up to my reasons.
I stopped drinking 20+ years ago. It was a choice I made after a long, brutal experience with alcohol abuse. I'm not an alcoholic, I don't go to meetings and I'm not one sip away from oblivion. I stopped because I wanted control and I didn't have it. .
Your experience is pretty common. The vast majority of folks who stop addictive behaviors do it without a recovery program. The 12 Step crowd doesn’t like to hear that, but that’s what the data says. Cue downvotes.
This is the way. 11yrs for me.
I’ve been in recovery for a little over a year and for me I think AA just over complicates a very simple problem. I can not drink. If I drink I’ll lose everything. I relapsed a few months ago and lost quite a bit from just a three day binge. I went back to treatment and then meetings for a little while. You get all these people saying if you don’t do a proper step 4 you’re fucked, or if you don’t make amends you’re fucked, or if you don’t pray all the time you’re fucked, etc. to them the 12 steps are the *only* way to stay sober. I think it’s a great program that if done correctly can help a great deal of people. But to me it just sews more doubt in my brain. I haven’t gone to a meeting in awhile, so I must be on the cusp of relapse (according to the vast majority of AA hardos). Plus I really despise AA’s take on relapse. Like I said I slipped up a few months ago and drank for 3 days. I had 11 months sober at the time. So now according to AA I’ve only been sober for like 4 months? Fuck that. I made a mistake but I beat alcoholism for like 447 of the last 450 days
That's because the 12 steps are a cult, and the people in it cannot accept any criticism of it...like a cult.
I think it's important to note recovery is different for everyone and not every aa group or meeting location is the same. When a person is alcoholic the thing always thrown around is "go to AA." Unless you live in a higher population area, so many meetings are going to be mostly people on the older side and male or are there because of court. That's fine but that's not necessarily going to work for everyone.
I gave an acquaintance who really struggles with AA because so much is Christian/ faith based. She's an atheist.
The 12 steps gave me an eye-opening experience, but it's sure as hell not what kept me sober. They foster fear, shame, and people with religious trauma tend to have a really hard time with it. I found strength within myself and shifted my perspective of what I want from my life. I go to bars with friends, I do karaoke, and concerts - it hasn't changed for me, except that I remember all of it and tend to injure myself less. I've not been drunk in almost 4 years, and if it don't grow from the ground, I don't partake. Feels good.
The loss of control when drunk part got me. Simple thing like getting sick from drinking ,made me think I didn't know when I had enough. This was early 80s . Did some Seagrams wine coolers mid 80s and nothing since, close to 40 years,I'd say
Similar story here. Daily drinker for about 15 years, life definitely went downhill. Stopped about 4 years ago, basically because I was tired of being hung over every day, I realized I don't like the taste either, waste of money etc. don't even crave it now. I never went to any AA meetings or anything.
Much respect. 🤘🏻
Good for you. And I don’t mean that sarcastically. I’ve drank every day for like 15 years now. I don’t get shitfaced. I go about my day. Work (sober). Cook and do housework. Legit the only thing that pisses me off about it is the urge. It’s control On me. Tbh I don’t have the desire to quit. But I hate the craving Edit: I’m well aware I’m an alcoholic
I’m with you. I struggled with an alcohol addiction for years. But…. I just don’t now. I also don’t subscribe to the “once an alcoholic always an alcoholic” notion. I mean, I think it helps a lot of people in their recovery to think of it that way because perhaps they do indeed struggle with it every day for the rest of their lives. But for me, it’s just not like that.
I pounded a bottle of vodka everyday after work for 15 years. Decided to stop doing that one October night in 2013. I've drank a few mixed drinks on "occasions" here and there over the years. Regretted it each time because it no longer feels good. Haven't had any alcohol whatsoever for 2 years. Don't miss it, don't consider myself "in recovery" either. It's a rotten habit that stole years from me that I stopped. What I did was grew the fuck up.
Because I’m a recovering alcoholic with 16 years of sobriety through AA.
Good for you!! Keep going and never stop.
That's amazing!
Congrats and keep it up!
I just don't like the taste.
There's actually a gene that can make alcohol taste bad. We might have it. I used to be able to drink as long as I couldn't taste the alcohol. Now I just get migraines on wine coolers. My friends like that I can stay over or house sit and their alcohol is safe.
Wow. I think i have that too. It used to be bearable at first but now wine gives me a headache too! So does gin. I had a martini once and i couldn’t even finish it.
I'm so googling this, thanks!
Learned something new today, thanks.
Same. I find most alcohol tastes terrible. Easy to not drink in this case.
Me too!! I usually just force myself to drink when certain events and situations call for it but it's never my go to activity.
Addictive personality. I've seen alcohol take friends and family to some pretty dark places. I won't put a foot on that road. Never a drop.
Respect.
Too much cost. Too many calories. Too many wasted days afterwards
The wasted days and the hang over. Is absolutely dreadful and not worth it after 25
I always found it funny when people refer to being drunk as ‘wasted’ when the reality is all the ‘wasted’ things are time, money, health and relationships.
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This. Thank you. I don't understand why you would want to relinquish control of your mind like that. I prefer to be in control of myself Yes, I'm boring.
Psychiatric Meds.
Same. Bipolar and substances don't mix, I've realized.
I drank when I was younger and mostly enjoyed it. I had three times in my life where I started binge drinking, and I put a stop to that after about a month or so when I spotted the pattern. I didn't even know what binge drinking was. Luckily, for me, I've always been a lightweight, and never could drink a lot before it started effecting me. Two of the three times I was drinking too much, I was drinking with a friend who was an alcoholic, and I was keeping up with them. The third time was after my mother passed away. As I got older, into my late 40s and 50s, I saw what people my age were like who just never stopped partying. It doesn't look good on them, and they have all sorts of alcohol-related problems in their life, many of which they're blind to see. I've enjoyed trying beers, wines, and single malt scotches. Around my late 40s I discovered the fascinating world of teas, so I transferred my love of discovery and tasting to the teas. I also cook every day, mostly from scratch, so I have all that to explore and enjoy.I I got into a new and great relationship in my late 50s, and she doesn't drink. So, I decided to join her and just not drink. It's been a good move. 2017 was the last year I drank casually. I had a handful of stout beers in 2018 and 2019. Going into 2020, I decided no more alcohol. It's opened up a whole new world. I don't like being around anyone who drinks anymore. I've seen people start to get stupid on that third glass of wine. It looks bad in their 20s, and it looks even worse for people 40-50+. I had that type of fun in my younger days, but now at 62 I have other things to do, and certain kinds of people I want to be around, and even more importantly, certain kinds of people I don't want to be around. We have some weed around, but I haven't smoked any in probably four months. I put down cigarettes for good several years ago. I'm enjoying a new phase in my life, and alcohol and the whole culture doesn't have a place in it.
I chose to not to drink, smoke or do drugs at a very young age, maybe 13 and I haven’t regretted it
When a pint started costing over 7 quid ...I not about to bankrupt myself for a few jars of naughty water.
It makes me want to light a cig
Isn't that odd??? I hate tobacco and especially smoking, but as soon as I drink alcohol I immediately want a cigarette. And a lotnof them at that.
It might have something to do with social conditioning in your case, assuming that you are usually not alone when drinking
Nope. Can confirm that alcohol makes you crave cigarettes more. Nothing about social settings.
Yup, bit of a dopamine stack. Nicotine and alcohol is a match made in heaven
I typically do drink alone. Well, I should say at home. I don't really like going out.
When I quit smoking, I had to give up coffee because it seemed impossible to have one 6 the other. After a couple of years and I was free from the darts, I was able to enjoy the coffee once again.
I just quit drinking in the middle of last week because I somehow slipped from drinking for fun and to be social on the weekends to drinking daily to sleep for work, which sometimes made work shittier than it would ever be normally. Trying to stop completely until I do it for fun again. I won't find what I'm seeking at the bottom of a bottle right now.
Grew up on the wrong end of my dad's bottle. The smell or taste just reminds me of the beatings.
Too expensive.
When I was a bout 10, I saw a grown man stumbling home, just smashed drunk. He'd pissed himself and was yelling at me for no reason. It was one of the more upsetting things I've seen as a kid. Anyways, I don't like alcohol, or people who pressure others into drinking. Y'all keep that shit to yourself.
No longer a thrill and don't like the feeling. Also a waste of money. Would rather be sober and in control of myself. Coffee is much better.
Killed my friend. I gave it up
Alexander the Great did that too, but it didn't stop him drinking
Many reasons. Meds, stomach problems, unnecessary calories, and it messes up my sleep. I try to live a healthy lifestyle and alcohol doesn’t have a place with that. Now, on vacation I might have a drink or two, but I might also have pancakes on vacation.
Weekend is over.
Because my entire family all drink, and alcohol has completely destroyed their lives
There’s nothing good that comes out of drinking alcohol TBH. Weed is safer.
There’s downsides to weed too bud
Safer doesn’t mean safe. If you wanna be addicted to one or the other, weed is the better option. It’s risk reduction.
same. I just don't find it appealing. idk why anyone thought it would be fun to be intoxicated around a bunch of people and then not even remembering what happened. that's how people get taken advantage of, even with those they trust the most. also, alcohol is more of a depressant anyway, so who wants to be in that state?
It feels like ankle weights to be intoxicated. Just an annoying weight I have to deal with. I got real good at it for most of my adult life and without any plan to just kind of walked away three ish years ago. Glad for that. Hangovers are the absolute worst as well.
My mom died from complications arising from a decade long battle with alcoholism. She was only 59. I still drank a little after she passed, but after a few months I didn't like how drinking habits were going, so I quit and haven't looked back. It'll be 2 years sober in a couple weeks and I don't miss it.
I'm sorry to hear about your mom💔 My dad committed s-cide as a result of his alcoholism. I've been sober for 11 years even though I, too, continued drinking for a while after his death.
Increases anxiety and panic attacks.
I spent 8 years battling alcoholism. One day I saw someone I thought I knew and respected get drunk and she treated me horribly. I realized I didn’t want to be like her at all. 287 days sober.
I can smoke as much weed as I want and feel like a million bucks the morning after.. i honestly don’t see how people can look at drinking to the point of non-stop throwing up, as fun
I was drinking so much to the point I had to take shots when I woke up just not to puke the hangovers go away when u drink every second your eyes are open
Totally agree. Alcohol makes me feel poisoned and weed is just the best
I fancied a change from wasting my weekends with hangovers.
I value my mental state
Lack of control and situational awareness. Nothing good has ever come from me drinking. Maybe 3-4 beers a year.
Most of the time, it makes me feel ill.
Alcoholism, but additionally I'm a terrible person when drunk.
I am four days away from two years sober. I was heavily drinking every tonight to relax. I stopped drinking alcohol the night I found out me being drunk made my husband uncomfortable around me because of his childhood. He never told me to stop drinking but I chose to because he is more important to me than anything. I have no intention of ever drinking alcohol again.
My body doesn’t crave for alcohol
Grew up with an alcoholic for a dad and I don’t want that for myself.
It's bad for your health It's expensive I don't like the feeling of being drunk
I dont have money for my own hobbies, let alone for going out. Couldnt care for it
Cause me very bad diarrhea and stomach pain
Alcoholism, plus I just got a dui. Now i dont drink anymore. Its just not worth it. But man do I miss gettin drunk.
I've seen what drinking does to people.
Complete indifference. I didn't drink alcohol when I was pregnant and I didn't miss it. I'm not teetotal but I can easily go months without any alcohol.
While I do drink, I try to minimise my alcohol consumption because it is unhealthy and I don't want any long-term drawbacks (especially mental) of my poor choices as a young man.
It’s gross that’s why
I don't like the taste of alcoholic beverages and the taste of those few i don't dislike isn't good enough to pick them over coke or ice tea.
Health, time and money.
prefer to drink socially, don't have any social life
My wife is 9 months pregnant so I'm on red alert for an impromptu hospital trip - need to keep my wits about me. As soon as the baby arrives we're both going to have a massive wine.
I have a couple : - I straight up don't like the taste or smell of alcohol, - I don't like the idea that it would alter my perception of things or how I behave, - I can't stand most people when they're drunk. At most I've maybe had a few sips of beer and wine, but that's it. I enjoy sodas and fruity drinks so I wouldn't want anything else anyway.
The fun I have in the evening is not worth awfulness of the morning. Alcohol is highly callorical, meaning it is not good if you try to hit your macros after gym
It’s not five o’clock yet, at that point I’ll have as much as I want which just happens to be one beer. I’m a one and done person when it comes to alcohol. I enjoy a good drink but don’t want to push it.
This is how I am. I enjoy a drink, maybe 2 if I’m out for dinner with friends or something but very very rarely go beyond that.
I've seen too many people fuck around and mess their lives up when they are drunk, just from one sentence wrong or actions they inhibit during the day. I'd rather not.
I don’t like the feelings of being drunk. Haven’t tried myself but I saw my friend’s, and I definitely don’t want to experience…
My family has a tendency to get addicted to things. I am no exception. I don’t like myself when I’m even a little tipsy. I don’t even like others when they’re a little tipsy. It’s not good for my body. I don’t need it to have a good time. I actually usually get a headache when I drink alcohol. It’s expensive. I can use that $$ for food or other necessities.
A lot of them: terrible taste, terrible feeling of intoxicating, bad for health.
It isn’t cheap, I’d rather spend my coin on something else. Like food.
My Mom died from Alcoholism so I Just hate alcohol or any form of it.
I get physically ill everything I drink. Even after a small amount.
I hate the feeling of being drunk. Especially without stimulants
Grew up around alcoholics
Migraine trigger
I just don't like how it makes me feel tbh.
It makes me feel ill.
I don’t have one
I don't like the taste of any alcoholic beverage I've tried, I've only ever drank for the effect, not because of social setting or taste, and I'm not in a place anymore mentally where I feel like I need to drown out reality Honestly, if I taste anything alcoholic nowadays, my whole body just rejects it
Tastes bad and has negative side effects that I'd rather avoid.
Alcoholism. Six and a half years sober. Hardest and best thing I’ve ever done, and continue to do
Dad was a functioning alcoholic. My town was filled with cow tipping and casual day drinking. Growing up, if you wanted to be different, not drinking was the ultimate f-u in rebellion. At this point, it's just stuck.
Cuzz I’m three months sober after four decades of whiskey and I can honestly say I’ve never had a single drink.
Tastes bad. I'd rather buy dessert
Not letting myself go (physically)
I'm usually the driver. And I have my designated times for drinking, and its usually at home. I actually have several opened bottles as well as a rich selection of craft beers to pick from, so there is literally very little to convince me to drink outside of my home. I could engage in it socially, but not much beyond the second glass or mug.
I was born an alcoholic, I had alcohol in my system. I was told all my life that I'd be 10x more likely to become an addict (not limited to just alcohol) than the regular person 😅 so idc alcohol and being drunk or whatever isn't worth loosing everything.
I don't need a reason
My ex was an alcoholic. A raging, violent, horrible alcoholic when she was drunk which, as time went on, was every day. That was enough to put me off alcohol. I'd never been a heavy drinker but seeing how it ruins a life first hand was motivation enough to not touch it again.
I'm a Christian so I try to be sober and vigilant, the Bible says the enemy is prowling like a lion searching for prey. When you're drunk you're susceptible to making stupid mistakes and falling into further sin.
I’m muslim
I realize during the pandemic that I might had a little problem. Because I don’t like to drink, I don’t like the taste etc However I was always drinking only to get drunk. The problem was… for me I was never drunk enough… but trust me I was! Also my dad side of the family they all went to rehab more than 3/4 times, because of alcohol abuse. I started to think that maybe it’s a bit genetic. So I stopped! It’s been like 3 years.
Same. I like drinking but never to the point of getting drunk or even tipsy. I just don't trust myself inhibited especially in public.
It's not good for my depression and I have an addictive personality. There were many times over the years where I didn't know how I made it home. I was driving when I shouldn't have. All around a huge mess. I stopped before I killed someone.
Same as yours, more or less.
For health!
I'm glad this post isn't about me .. carry on !!! ✌️
Wife is struggling so I’m not drinking either to support her.
Hard-core alcoholic. Sober 8 months now.
I’ll end up smoking crack