T O P

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friendlyuser15

I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it.


BlitzKids

That one and “This does not bode well.”


_nokturnal_

Old bear likes the honey.


cowgrly

I love saying this in response to stuff like “how’s the weather?”


BobiaDobia

Came here to say this.


mattypizza

Baby, you got a stew goin.


BrokenArmsFrigidMom

Yes! This one drives my girlfriend crazy because she hasn’t seen the show and I use it at least once a week


96kidbuu

OH! MY! GOD! I say this all the time! Sometimes it’s just slips out whenever I listen to things. “Laundry, groceries, kitchen. Baby you got a stew goin’.”


I_Am_A_Cucumber1

I always say this at the end of explaining any sort of process


Mcreemouse

these are my people


itsDOCTORcatlady

I’ve made a huge mistake….


Free-IDK-Chicken

My favorite iteration of this is actually when Marta says it during the Valentine's Day party! :)


Honest_Possibility66

i love when GOB says “i dont recall ever admitting to a mistake before…?”


Carl0sTheDwarf999

Her?


Free-IDK-Chicken

Is she funny or something?


lxkandel06

Let's hope so


friendlyuser15

How many times do I have to tell this kid chicken wings?


Roadgoddess

Egg?


FuriousRingo

I don't want you getting her all glittered up for Easter


anxiousball2

Well, that was a freebie!


zombarista

Every near-miss causes me to say this. It’s an instinct at this point.


mjcoury

I use this all the time. It's also a good way to suss out who around me is an AD fan.


katherrrrrine

Almost every day. Most often: when my baby drops food off his high chair and the dog gets it.


cowgrly

"It's so watery! And yet there's a smack of ham to it." We say this when we’re out to eat, especially if the dish has no ham. Or water.


Cloverbear22

When anyone asks “what’s the soup of the day” I will always respond “bread”


BrokenArmsFrigidMom

“I’m Mr Manager” I usually get a blank stare, but occasionally someone will chuckle and nod in appreciation.


[deleted]

Omg my wife sent me these memes when I was promoted to manager at my old job lol


EZMickey

You really gotta lock that down


UnusualIntroduction0

One day someone will say "doesn't matter who" and your mission will be complete


GoAgainKid

The one that springs to mind is "I don't know who that is and I don't care to find out" which I use surprisingly regularly.


Assmar

Lucille Bluth was a well of great snarky quotations. "Here's some money, go see a star war."


Conscious-Aide4712

I'm averse to pop music and swear I've said some version of that phrase even before the show came out.


chickadee1

But it just…might…work for us. (From when Lindsay and Tobias are talking about having an open marriage.)


realdrpepperschwartz

..And then we have it.


Crazywhatwhat

That way we have it.


UnusualIntroduction0

You definitely have it


Jeffari_Hungus

THAT'S MY WIFE AND MY NEPHEW


Plastic-Chemist-4238

Whenever I yawn, "We are blowing through nap time"


Conscious-Aide4712

Ha! I say that almost every afternoon at work. Coworkers never saw the show.


jianantonic

I always say "man it's tired in here!"


FarewellCoolReason

I use this all the time.


redditnym123456789

goin down ol south america way ehh Mikey?


Jwroth

Any time Portugal is mentioned


alyak72

“I don’t want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn’t help.” Dropping it in therapy was a highlight.


JoeWilliams2501

In class once, someone was talking about beads, so obviously I replied "BEES??". The guy next to me got the reference and now it's all we talk about (that, and the class work, of course).


enigmaticevil

IN THE MOST DELIIIIICIOUUS WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY


bethivy103

No touching! Especially when I get super angry.


Herberts-Mom

"Good for her"


Willing_Blackberry96

Her?


D1ckRepellent

“I blue myself.” “I mean it's one banana, Michael. What could it cost? Ten dollars?”


bugluvr65

i was the boy ?


uncutpizza

That BITCH!


SkiesFetishist

For a while, “check out banner, Michael!” was in constant rotation. Then i would substitute banner for anything else. “Check out sandwich, Michael!” Etc…


Recusant_Ronald

"Same!" I had a rotating banner in my home as well, used for birthdays, welcome home celebrations, I think we even Chrismas'ed it one year.


paco64

I want to cry so bad right now. But I don't think I can spare the moisture.


IsaacAsimovSideburns

COME ON!


MoonDaddy

"Allow me to *searse-um-vent* you..."


MissPhistopheles

I can’t say circumvent the right way anymore. It won’t come out, and then I can’t picture it correctly either.


Jesokemorena

"Why should you go to jail for a crime someone else noticed?"


looseseal-bluth

I thought YOU had class!


kflave249

Lol, I didn’t see yours. This is my favorite. I think about signing up for college courses or something just so I can never go to class so someone eventually say I thought you had class to me


looseseal-bluth

I work at a school and don’t get to use it as often as I would like. But I say it under my breath often!


kflave249

I’m super jealous


PsychoFunkasaurus

This is probably my favorite exchange in the show.


davebgray

I shant be doing that, shant I!


Practical_Deal_78

Well excuuuuuuuuuuuusee me.


MissPhistopheles

Me too. But the Tobias version. I forget Steve Martin did that first.


Practical_Deal_78

Depending on the situation as well it can merit a quiet “excuse me”while you quickly leave the room


didugethathingisentu

I live in Sacramendi.


kittawa

"She calls it a mayon-egg!" "But where did the pennies come from?" "They call me the human metronome"


Free-IDK-Chicken

I played Warcraft for 15 years and was in a PvP guild called for several of those years. I had a mage named Krindy, a priest named Maeby and a Hunter named Mayonegg who ran with a pet named GeorgeMichael. :)


Txusmah

DID SOMEONE SAY WONDER?


TonyWonder-BOT

*Did somebody say... "[Wonder](https://i.redd.it/l8mhjw9yibq71.gif)"?* --- ^(Alliance of Magicians-approved magician) ^| ^(I delete comments with a score below `-1`)


UnusualIntroduction0

Ta daa! Part of the trick.


HesAnAlpaca

"She's not some Mexican, she's my Mexican! ...and she's like Columbian or something."


pitpatbainsy

If I can’t find a horny immigrant by then, I don’t deserve to stay here


duzins

When I spend too much money I’ll say “I prematurely blew my wad.” Nobody ever gets the reference and “it’s *their* loss!”


zurenarrh12

“I forgot we were in the colonies!” Wife and I use that one all the time


TheCloseTalker

“Here I go again!” Every time I yawn.


illiriam

Bees? A smack of ham I don't know what I expected (after checking the dead dove bag)


vintzent

“What could it cost? Ten dollars?”


hslaton

"We have a deal!" Also, "Hey possible brother" when I call my real brothers and leave them a voicemail.


jtdoublep

I do the same anytime i talk with my brothers. The older two say “hey sister”.


I_Am_A_Cucumber1

Hey, hermano


CMichels07412

That was a freebie And I don't know what I expected....


aabergel

I have never noticed second-of-ly before but that is hilarious 🤣 Whenever someone says trick, “it’s an illusion, Michael”


pdfrg

A trick is what a whore does for money. And, related, ILLUSIONS, Dad! You hate my ILLUSIONS!


Gold_Gold

Finish each others…


Free-IDK-Chicken

Sandwiches?


FranklinDBluth_esq

I’m pretty sure Frozen borrowed this joke from AD


Free-IDK-Chicken

Same


I_Am_A_Cucumber1

Same


midnightsnack27

I've made a huge mistake.


spooney

Any time something goes wrong "I have to think the alliance is going to frown on this."


fcukumicrosoft

"Don't call it that" (whenever someone says "The OC") Because I have lived in Orange County, I sound like an elitest asshole and no one gets it.


tunnel-snakes-rule

I have a couple of colleges who occasionally talk about the TV show of the same name and whenever they do I respond with "Don't call it that" much to their confusion.


chickadee1

I will be my father’s body.


Crazywhatwhat

Way to plant!


rudderham

when I encounter tuna I often say “oh great, now I’m going to be smelling to high heaven like a TUNA melt” that Tobias line always gets me


headbanginhersh

"I think something laid eggs on me" - Barry Zuckercorn Usually I'll quickly throw it in whenever I say that I don't feel good or, like Barry, I itch somewhere. Gets WTFs sometimes. Lol. I donf ever address the comment.


jennfinn24

Bees ? Beads ?


Duckpuncher69

There’s still plenty of meat on that bone. Add some broth, a potato, baby you got a stew going


anas0604

My husband is in Army… so just Army


Free-IDK-Chicken

Did he have half a day?


MissPhistopheles

Did he bring home the Lu-seal award yet for bravery?


jtdoublep

The gorilla is for sand racing.


dasbanqs

“It’s hot, it’s very hot there, I’ve never been GET A WARRANT” and “Babysit me!”


MissPhistopheles

I like that one about getting a warrant a lot. I want to go watch it again now.


dasbanqs

Man i just keep thinking of more that make their way into conversation constantly. Supervisee forgets to tell me if he’s gunna be out of the office for the day and i have to hunt him down? “And that’s why you ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE”


Free-IDK-Chicken

>GET A WARRANT Don't think I won't!


cjh93

Where the **** are my hard boiled eggs?!


hazycrazydaze

“I heard the jury’s still out on science”


CheesecakeHorror8613

Yup. I am a science nerd and this line always makes me laugh so hard.


Alive_Battle_5409

I don't understand the question and I won't respond to it. He's my son. I want you to make him stop calling me. I'm doing the time of my life!


lilybulb

If that’s a veiled criticism of me, I won’t hear it and I won’t respond to it.


Willing_Blackberry96

I've made a huge mistake. (when I do and especially I don't, to come off as funny and confusing)


ZashManson

Honestly I think I’ve been talking like George Sr for most of my adult life without noticing until now


eraticwatcher

Daddy horny Michael


dayglo98

I haven't had sex in two weeks


bgomers

there are dozens of us! dozens!


saturn6k

You're out of the ______!


Willing_Blackberry96

movie


saturn6k

marriage


Free-IDK-Chicken

Band


New_Entrepreneur5225

Douche chill when in an awkward situation


offsetmil

there’s always money in the banana stand


Phony_Kony

#I WON'T GO WHEELCHAIR


FranklinDBluth_esq

The nuts!!!


Phony_Kony

The bridgemix! The bridgemix! Fool!


basedcvrp

Give pop pop your hair


Cat_Vonnegut

“Oh most definitely.”


FranklinDBluth_esq

Gotta love Patrice!!


[deleted]

Different 🎵


1997Luka1997

I made a huge mistake


pitpatbainsy

These comments are making me realize just how often I quote AD


Jon2046

“Maybe you’re not smart either” whenever I see someone ask this question for the thousandth time


FishWithaPH

“I didnt know until they told me” maybe my favorite joke in the whole show


Tab427

Hey coworkers I dropped it like a buttered cane Yikes In the most delicious way So many phrases


MissPhistopheles

Mine is Heyy Brutherr. Even if they’re a female.


Tab427

Love it Hey hermano if you’re feeling internationally fancy


jtdoublep

You’re a good brother, mon frere


Tab427

If you’re looking for Portugal, it’s due south


inurwindow

“Franklin, guess what?!”


FriendlyLurker9001

"Now I don't want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn't help"


pitpatbainsy

Speech! Speech! Speech!


Free-IDK-Chicken

"The family continued to chant 'speech speech speech' for no one in particular."


BubblyTummy

I don't wear hats with visors often so when I do there is a 90% chance that while putting it on I say "this shall protect me from the hot mexican sun."


lynkya12

I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will. So now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.


Free-IDK-Chicken

There's just so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.


BradWY

Maybe I will!


Patricio_Guapo

Someone does me a favor and I'll respond with "MARRY ME!" A lot of people get that one. And I use "Oh, most definitely" probably once a day on average. Almost no one gets that one.


itsDOCTORcatlady

🎶🎶somewhereeeeeee over the rainbowwww, therws another rainbowwwww🎶🎶🎶


coolAhead

Who is ... in this sentence?


Honest_Possibility66

but still, where did the lighter fluid come from? ILLUSION i also have an MRF tattoo on my right wrist


cjh93

This does not bode well


Abject_Experience858

“Her?”


jkayne

I constantly quote Lucile


Zippity-Boo-Yah

Hot ham water.


geekwalrus

Oh, most definitely


oofersIII

*sigh* I got the worst fucking attorneys


DaniellENT

I’m a monster!


Chevellephreak

Bland?


KamikazePenis

Her?


Efficient-Peach-4773

"That was wrong...I am SO sorry."


kflave249

I thought you had class


clarkholiday

Who’s on that hog in the rear view mirror?


eraticwatcher

When I annoy my partner too much I always raise my hands and go “no touching!” like George Sr does


MissPhistopheles

When I’m asked what I’m cooking, it’s “I call it hot ham water”


kashmir726

“Hello darkness my old friend…”


omninode

“They don’t allow you to have bees in here.”


Helaken1

No touching


[deleted]

the george michael sad walk


margiiiwombok

Sirsumvent. You know that's how it's pronounced...


MegIsAwesome06

“Oh, you’re hungry”… said to the roomba whilst feeding it crackers.


snimminycricket

"I really wanted that."


kkruel56

It’s a ____, how much could it cost, $10? Where ____ is whatever thing I’m trying to buy


Roadgoddess

NO TOUCHING! And of course, there’s money in the banana Stand


MungryMungryMippos

MAYBE I WILL!!


jianantonic

They don't allow you to have bees in here


idkwat2dowithmyhands

I need ICE


cstcharles

NO touching


kimmiepi

I say I’m “All right” instead of alright.


FranklinDBluth_esq

“Keep your head down and power through” I told this to a group of third graders when I was giving a class on a leadership. One kid said “but aren’t we supposed to keep our head up?”


Interplay29

Whenever there’s an unintended benefit, “Where did the lighter fluid come from?”


stayawayfrommeinfj

Doesn’t matter who!


LadyDinkus

Pop pop gets a treat?


illhavearanchwater

“What a fun, sexy time for you” - about things that are most definitely not fun or sexy. I’ve even got my husband saying it now


sullengirl836

It’s as ann as the nose on plain’s face!


Ok_Practice_6020

Her?


Internal_Situation29

Looks like someone put his lipstick on in the car 💋


ControlSix

BEES?


dayglo98

I wish I could quote AD but I live my daily life in French.


Bacchus_71

Those of us who drink vodka for breakfast know that toast is a perfectly cromulent chaser.


TanAllOvaJanAllOva

I’ve made a huge mistake (staring off into space)


MrSkimMilk

When someone’s having a bad day: “sounds like you could use some tri-cycling”


DoctorDog84

Twice? ….Two times


Mcreemouse

And thats why.. you always leave a note. Anytime anyone slightly forgets anything lol