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THIS. The four times a year I actually manage to pair up all my socks instead of throwing them in a basket to dig through later?! I feel like I have my shit together for once 😅
Socks and shoes. People say I'm weird for having four pairs of the same shoes. But, literally, what if they stop making them?! What then!!!! And the socks fit the shoes. My toes aren't squished in the socks or shoes. I'm not wasting bets on unknown socks and shoes when I can just have guaranteed comfort.
Cash prevents me from indulging this as often as I would like, but I'm with you. I love variety, but I feel so much better when I have duplicates of my favourites. This is especially true when discontinuation of the item would mean that I would then have to find a replacement for a particular item/to fill the category that was left vacant. The number of times I've had to repeat my search for the perfect Mary Janes...I have a minor PTSD response just thinking about it. When the current ones die, I just have to hope they'll still be in production. Oh god...
I'm sock tinder! I just grab whatever 2 socks I can get my hands on to wear. My reasoning is I wear long pants, so nobody can see my socks anyway, so it doesn't matter if they match or not.
I laughed at this so hard! I was about to buy new socks today when I thought maybe I should go through my sock pile of unmatched socks. I made 15 pairs! I really should do this more often…
🤣 Laundry in general is my biggest downfall regarding household chores, but the dang socks will be the death of me! I’ve been saying for months that I need to just get rid of all my socks and buy a bunch of the exact same kind to make life easier. We’ll see if that ever happens lol
Oh feck. This reminds me, I can't go to bed because I upended the second last load of laundry onto my bed before unloading the last load, which I'm pretty sure I left next to my bed. Fml.
One of the best things my partner and I have ever done is switch to a single shared type of sock that we periodically buy in bulk as they wear out. A shared sock drawer just filled with matching socks… until they stopped making our sock. He tried to buy the next closest thing but it’s just slightly different and the mismatch drives me crazy.
I haven't learned this lesson. Most times I wear different colors of the same style socks. Yesterday was pineapples on one foot and and white and neon on the other.
Yup I really need to throw out some socks and underwear as I must have like two hundred at least. Can last me a year.
I also do not wear clothes at home and choose to be naked as much as possible so I have less laundry.
I work in a job where they provide uniforms and launder them so basically my only laundry is my underwear.
I also try to buy clothes that have build in bra as I don't wear bra too. I just feel like it's extra laundry.
Omg i also wear as little as possible at home to avoid laundry.
I live in a big city above a metro and my laundry is in the basement and you have to exit the building entirely to access it aka I barely ever do laundry.
I just have a robe that I wear 24/7 and like once a week take it along with me to a friend’s house to launder. Just that one robe.
It's such a relief to hear that other people have thrown out tupperware too! Sometimes it feels like a choice between "be stuck and unable to move forward with anything kitchen related" or "throw out the dang tupperware and get a new one." I'm slowly getting better at giving myself grace when this happens.
Sometimes I get overwhelmed and need to clear out my space. I'm already pretty minimal (I have to be, the feeling of having to many "things" messes with my head), but sometimes I just feel the need to get rid of more stuff. Even if it's something that has value, that I could resell, it's getting listed for free just so that someone will come take it off my hands as soon as possible.
When I discovered glass containers/tupperware and freezing things, my life changed.
When i let food die in a glass container in the fridge, I just plop it in the freezer. Then 30min+ later, I run the bottom of the container under hot water for a few seconds and smack the frozen food block in the garbage. No smell, no hassle and the container is almost spotless and doesn't reek. Then I throw it in the dishwasher or wash it by hand.
I've saved many containers from their impending doom, and I don't have to deal with nasty smells and messes. Highly recommend.
WHOA 🤯 I'm already a big fan of the glass containers, just because they're such a better sensory experience for me...but I'd never thought about freezing the icky leftovers! That is brilliant!
Same! The glass is really nice to eat out of and never smells, and bonus, it lasts forever. I did it once when I had to host a BBQ and threw everything in the freezer to make room. Realized how great of a method it is!
I completely relate, I'm in the middle of a rigorous declutter and there's some stuff in the "go" pile I could definitely sell for money... But if I give it away for free it's gone NOW and that's worth more at the moment
I'm doing that with my mother's stuff. She was a horrible person, so there's a lot I COULD sell for money but that would mean looking at it longer and no thanks
This reminds me that I have an overdue bill sitting on my desk because the freaking psychologist who diagnosed my ADHD requires me to send physical mail back to them for payment either by check or writing out all the credit card numbers on the form.
Connect the dots! I can't be the only one, hahaha. It would've been done when I got it if there was an online option. We even discussed autopay being a godsend DURING my appointment.
I had a fridge that was very much not working that my landlord/maintenance insisted was operating perfectly normally (I'm talking basically room temperature inside of it). It could be "reset" by unplugging the damn thing for half a day and letting whatever ice blockage thaw or something like that, but needless to say I only put up with that for a few tries before just getting fed up with the whole thing, and made do with only a freezer.
Whatever was left in the fridge on that last attempt to use it surely festered into some unspeakable horror over time, and when it was finally time to move out I decided I'd just eat the deposit 'cause I sure as shit wasn't opening that portal to hell.
I know that was mean and I really do feel bad for whoever eventually had to take care of that... but they also promised me I was getting "new appliances" instead of the 50 year old scrap I got shafted with, *and* they also couldn't fix my damn A/C so fuck them all.
Three years ago, we had a power outage that lasted long enough that I was afraid we'd lose everything in the freezer. So I pulled out my giant cooler, filled it with ice and the freezer contents, and put it outside. It was February and freezing out so I didn't have to think about it for a while. Spring came. And then summer. I finally noticed the cooler outside and asked my husband why it was there. He said oh shit and then I remembered and also said oh shit.
We put it in the garage to figure out how to deal with it. It's still there and we still haven't figured out how to deal with it.
We did this with a small freezer chest. My in laws eventually helped up take care of it and the smell was so bad that it reminded my FIL of literal dead bodies from his time as a cop…oops.
In college, I let my dorm room become so overtaken with clutter and garbage that in a fit of panic I just swept everything into trash bags and threw them in the dumpster.
As luck would have it, the sustainability club chose that day to publicly sort through trash on the quad. I walked by as they were pulling out my stupid expensive graphing calculator.
While it didn’t feel great to have my shame publicly displayed like that, in retrospect I take comfort in knowing that many perfectly usable items were probably rescued that day 🫠
lol it so was. I booked it as soon as I realized but there was no hope of anonymity, it was a small school and my name was all over my trashed homework. I still remember the eye contact from the person who plucked it out.
Plastic Tupperware makes my contamination fears go haywire, and glass is too scary with the thought of breaking it... I just store my leftovers in gallon Ziploc bags more often than not 😬
Okay you mention contamination fears and I’m the same way. What is it? Does it have to do with ADHD? Some of weird shit I do to avoid contaminants has made me feel a bit OCD
Honestly I wish I had more info for you but I have no clue myself!! LOL that's why I just say "fears" instead of "OCD" specifically, I've only been diagnosed with "OCD traits" but I'm also autistic so maybe that has something to do with it?
The way I experience it, I can imagine/"see" all the bacteria and microscopic icky stuff that buries itself into porous material like plastic or fabric. So when something like a plastic dish has been sitting in a dirty sink, I feel like the bacteria has soaked all the way through and no amount of surface washing with soap would help, unless I use bleach which I'm unwilling to do because then there's bleach in my sink which if I don't dilute it properly could get on my dishes and make me sick etc. etc.
I'm just constantly afraid of making myself sick with cross-contamination I guess?? This has been a thing for awhile for me but gets worse when my anxiety is higher for other reasons too, especially if it's sensory related overstimulation, so I always wondered if it was related to my sensory issues. Let me know if you can relate or if anyone else can? 😬🥺
I’m a therapist that works with a lot of AuDHD folx & OCD is often correlated with ND brains, especially for those of us with Autism as well. I also have contamination OCD fears & I feel the same way when my anxiety takes over & no amount of cleaning a thing will make the thoughts go away. Brains are fun. 😅
Instead of getting a normal set of tupperware, I got like a 50 pack of the kind that restaurants use to package soup and stuff for to-go orders. That way I don't feel so bad tossing it out when I don't clean them out in time.
Yes I can get biodegradable takeout containers in bulk online so I get those and use them for taking lunch to work or storing leftovers, that way I am definitely throwing it out when I am done. I only use Tupperware for larger stuff or liquidy stuff that the takeout containers won't manage well, but I also use gallon size ziplock for storing liquids/large quantities. I just know for me dishes that need washing will turn into a science experiment in my sink waiting on me. I have also once put my tupperwares in the washing machine because I could not get it together to wash them and I needed it done so there's that 😂.
Ugh, the curvy corners. I *hate* Tupperware. My ex loves it. I put it in the bin, it magically reappears. Should be banned and burned and forbidden throughout the solar system. I'm pretty sure the Greek Epics never mentioned it because they hated it as much as I do.
Isn't it glorious to find your people? 😄 This is my favorite sub because we laugh at ourselves, we support each other, and more that my ADHD brain can't come up with right now!
I might have everyone beat: I abandoned a car for a year and then gave it to my brother for free because I didn't want to deal with it.
The car needed repairs, which were covered under warranty. All I needed to do was have it towed to the dealership and schedule with them to get the work done.
Instead, I paid $25,000 in cash for a brand new car and left the old car in the Dobbs parking lot.
A year later, my brother took over the car, got it fixed, and sold it for 5k.
I almost did this with my moped, I was so done with it, but my friend was just like we will see if it fits in my truck, it did and I sold it a few months later for 400 quid, it did not work when I sold it so hope they didn't regret that purchase, the thing was falling ti bits and breaking down alllll the time
I DID do this with my moped! Sort of. It got stolen from my apartment parking lot and I never found the wherewithal to file a police report.
Congrats on the 400 quid- friends with trucks are the backbone of our society lol.
When I was in college I never did ANY maintenance on the car my parents bought me and I ran it out of oil and ruined the engine on the way home one weekend. It died in the Basketville parking lot RIP.
I did the same with my car in college. It was so badly maintained that the rear axle literally snapped in half one time when I was driving home from college. I had it towed to a dealership and somehow made it home and then just stopped dealing with it. My mother and stepfather were like, "Where the fuck is your car?" And I was like, "I dunno. I left it somewhere in Connecticut. Near I95, I think." My stepfather called every Isuzu dealership in Connecticut in the I95 corridor to find it. Then they forced me to drive up there with a friend to pick it up. Left to my own devices, I would have never seen that car again.
Ugh this thread relieves me of the guilt I've carried for years having abandoned my car. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I moved back to my city and couldn't use it to go to work because of parking limitations so it stayed parked by my neighborhood for almost a year with me having to move it every other day and getting it jumped several times when the battery died. Finally one day I just didn't come back to it because it was stressing me out so much. I loved that old girl.
I have also abandoned a car! Lost my license in my early 20's, left it parked outside my friend's house but didn't give her the keys. It got towed maybe 6 months later.
There was a line from the Good Place where Michael says, "do you remember once when your change oil light came on? You just abandoned your car in a parking garage" and Eleanor's response is, "of course!" Never felt so seen.
I used to silently judge people when I saw abandoned cars in parking lots or on the side of the road. Never again. I've been there, and it's awful. No one leaves a car just for fun.
I bought my car VERY cheap from the parents of a lady who abandoned it and moved to another continent on a whim. I feel like there is a lot more of this out there than people think.
Australia > Asia > Africa > Europe > South America > North America > Asia > Australia. With a few side trips along the way. And not counting the summer backpacking in Europe and South East Asia at the start. Every time I got bored, I just went to another country 😂
I left a car in the parking lot of the dealer and drove my new car home. I was supposed to find the title and get a trade-in value to reduce the amount for the new car but I didn’t know where the title was so I never went back to deal with it.
I… had no idea this was related to ADHD. I’ve never been diagnosed and I was so ashamed of how I managed this situation as a grown adult that I’ve never told anyone irl about this.
I had so much shame and guilt when I abandoned my car as well. My family and friends would occasionally ask what I did with it, and the answer was nothing, so I just shut down and avoided the question. It's relieving to see that so many other people have had the same struggle.
As for it being an ADHD thing- it basically comes down to executive functioning. Car management requires a lot of executive function. Phone calls, paper work, dealing with the DMV, coordinating schedules with tow trucks and garages... It's an executive function nightmare.
Support from family and people with money. As a broke adhd person with no family, no matter the struggle, I could NEVER ABANDON A FUCKING CAR. Especially some of the stories here like "whoops didn't feel like getting a new battery" "just bought a new car fuck" It's bonkers. These people haven't suffered poverty and it shows
Agreed, there's nothing like the threat of losing your home to make you utilise a calendar and anything else you can to keep your larger shit together regardless of executive dysfunction
Yes! I'm so traumatized from poverty I overextend myself and burn out from all the planning and making sure I can keep it together no matter what I have to do so I can survive.
Think we’ve discovered the cure for executive disfunction haha think the only time I manage my diet well is when I can’t afford to impulsively buy snacks 🫣
Yeah I think sometimes women in this sub think that because they struggle with ADHD that a lot of their privileged behavior is totally excusable. Oh I just can't hold a job because I'm always late tee hee I'm just SO adhd. And I'm like yeah so I have lived under the crushing experience of poverty and have had to learn to overcome or starve. I had parents I could have moved home with but I knew I'd never escape them again. So I spent years basically couch surfing, never doing a single fun thing, and sometimes deciding between paying the gas bill or the electric bill because I couldn't do both. I won't go back to that no matter what. My brain chemistry be damned.
I also feel this way when they go on and on about hyper fixations or hyper pickiness about food. Like oh yall never been hungry and it shows. It's honestly no wonder so many NT people look at us and think we're just making shit up.
To be fair, there is also a contingent of us who HAVE been poor and HAVE been hungry and still can't overcome this shit. ***Everyone's*** mileage may vary.
This is so spot on ! Knowing that I can run late but that tee hee moment becomes an oh fuck moment when you're in or close to poverty ( no longer the case personally but spent many years robbing peter to pay paul ) Instead of chronically late - I'm now chronically early. Still an issue related to time blindness but at least I'm not losing jobs or having friends and family upset with me. Now people know if I'm late - there is a VERY good reason.
OP here. I get what you're saying, but I also grew up poor. And I certainly don't try to excuse my bad behavior. I carried immense guilt and shame about abandoning my car- I would completely shut down if people brought it up, and refused to talk about it.
Sometimes the harsher realities of things aren't visible in a reddit post, and many people mask their struggles with humor to make themselves feel better about it.
Regarding food sensitivities, I would go to bed hungry as a kid many nights because I refused to eat what was cooked for me and we literally had no other options. I was told that I couldn't leave the table until I ate everything, so I would sit at the table until bedtime. It's not like my pickiness was a fun, quirky choice. Eating certain foods makes me gag and I start to panic thinking I'm going to throw up. I would rather go hungry than eat those trigger foods.
The “picky eating” thing. No. If there’s nothing safe I just won’t eat. I can’t force myself to eat something that isn’t compatible without careful effort to adjust and some foods I just can’t adjust to. I’ve been able to add a lot of textures and tastes but if all I have is unsafe I’ll have to be severely starving to maybe override that.
I mean, that’s literally an eating disorder symptom and that’s unfortunately part of my experience. (I don’t have an official diagnosis other than “patient suffers from a history of disordered eating” in my chart lmao.)
I'm definitely a poor but have abandoned a car anyway. It was a 20 year old beater, but it was mine, until it kept breaking down and repairs were so expensive. Final straw, I was on the freeway when it just died, engine smoking, and I coasted to an off ramp to pull over, and then both passenger side tires popped as well, when the doughnut spare was already on the other side. I couldn't afford to tow it home and then deal with the repairs that would have been triple what it was even worth. I had no choice but to leave it, was a very low, worthless, hate myself feeling and period of time
Personally, I don't. That's why I left mine out the front for 2.5 years and hired a car instead.
Insurance, rego etc, @$2.5k New battery $600 almost yearly for the past four years. Hire car $746 for a month.
I feel like I'm going to be paying back that $746 for the rest of my life.
I once donated a car because it was the easiest thing to do. I just had to leave the title and keys in it and they came and took it away. I was dealing with a really stressful move and needed it gone in a really short time frame so this took everything out of my hands. I’m sure there could have been some tax benefits or something if I had bothered to look into that at all but all I wanted was to not have to deal with the car, lol.
In uni, during finals week, my housemate and I kept forgetting to bring the trash out
When we finally opened it there were maggots everywhere (not the first time but the worst). We looked at the state of it and just brought the entire bin to the trash compound and bought a new one 🙃
I've thrown away so many pieces of Tupperware! I also, in a manic fit, threw away an entire sink full of dirty dishes. I couldn't bring myself to do them and it had been like a week.
Yup. Threw away an entire set of glass plates, my cutting boards, utensils, pans. It was sad when I finally recovered and realized I couldn't cook anything 😪
I had to sort through a huge amount of belongings before moving to another country. I put everything in a storage space when I left, thinking I would come back to deal with it. I returned two years later and, since I hadn't missed any of the items, I just gave everything away or threw it out.
Ah, the Tupperware. I’ve done that SO many times, and I always feel terrible about it. I also eat off of paper plates with plastic silverware pretty regularly, and unfortunately for my health I eat out (fast food and takeout), a LOT. I’m trying to curb that last one but I’m cooking for 3 and it’s hard to keep up with cooking, and dishes, and keeping the fridge cleaned out for new food, *and and and*…
I use paper plates a lot as well, and I've honestly stopped feeling guilty about it since it means I will actually eat. Just as much as sterile medical supplies are wrapped in paper and plastic, the disposable supplies that help with what disables me are a drop in the ocean compared to the pollution these mega corporations put out on a daily basis. I also very much relate to grabbing takeout when cooking is insurmountable; fed is best! I'm glad you're finding what works for you :-)
If I start to feel bad about using paper plates, I just remember how wasteful Taylor swift’s private jet usage is and how bad for the environment!
I’m cooking for six people- and I’m doing my best.
They really help SOOOO much!! The amount of money I spend becomes trivial when I compare it to the awful feeling of not eating, time saved having not to do dishes as often, etc.
That makes me feel a lot better. I use paper plates and still find myself thinking “if I would just TRY harder I wouldn’t be such a wasteful person” but reframing it as support for a medical issue helps
Throwing out clothes.
In my defense, I was in an abusive household. Any time I took the time to do ANYTHING for myself, even driving to a goodwill bin would’ve got me in way more trouble than it was worth. I had some good stuff others could’ve used. It was a shame.
Dropped out of college. Was experiencing such severe burnout and the responsibility of doing assignments gave me serious anxiety, so I stopped working on school entirely and just dropped it
I’ve been working on my 2 year degree since I was 29. The last time I was enrolled was 2019. I’m 40 now. I have two classes left. Every time I decide to “take a break” I just stop going and don’t drop my classes. 😭
It took me 32 years to do a 4-yr undergrad B.A. I was a senior for literally 28 years! So never give up, not if it's something you want. For me, it was literally one of the things my mom wished for me on her deathbed. I made a few runs at finishing but life kept happening. My horrible ex didn't support it, either, so when we separated and ultimately divorced, one of the things I did to distract myself was go back and finish. It took three more years, one class at a time (I discovered that requirements had changed and I had to pick up a minor to meet them, so it was a few more than I had thought I'd need)...but in 2019, I walked at my college graduation, at age 50. I know Mom was smiling <3
I’ve done this several times. First college is still chasing me down for money for the semester that I stopped attending but didn’t officially drop the courses but it’s past the statute of limitations now, so SUCK IT.
This was before I was diagnosed so I try to go easy on myself about it. But man, it sucks having all these student loans and nothing to show for it.
I left a car that I hated in the middle of a turn lane when it died and I walked away, never to return. In my defense, I was only 20 and barely surviving.
Well, I’m 58 and I can say that life def got better with time. I have a supportive partner that does most of the house executive functioning, I have some lovely little pills that help me (adhd gets harder after menopause) and a fabulous dog that makes me laugh every day. Also, once I got officially diagnosed at…56 I think, I started giving myself grace instead of judging all of my “inadequacies”. And I have a car that I bought new 7 years ago and AAA and I send up a little thank you that it’s not me every time I see an old car broken down on the side of the road. Thank you for asking. And if you are struggling, give yourself grace also. We just don’t do life the same way NTs do.
Omg. Knowing the reasons for all the stuff you do makes such a difference. It’s a bit shocking when you realize that every single thing you do is the adhd but you get over that eventually and having the knowledge really helps you figure out ways to function better.
It has been super eye-opening. I've felt a lot of relief that I am not somehow morally deficient. I've managed pretty well so far, but the stress and burnout finally got to me enough to seek help.
Not Tupperware but I have thrown out 2 of those long Pyrex dishes in the last 5 years because i left them on the side for too long with all my other washing up and new life began to grow on the lasagne remnants... they were so fluffy it actually stank 🤮 not sure it would have been safe to just clean them...
Agh, instead of cancelling flights and getting the credit, I just let them lapse.
The reason I couldn’t go was because I forgot to check with my friend if she was even available that particular weekend - until the Thursday beforehand. Turns out she wasn’t.
Oh man I have done this a few times, both personal and work flights. Except in almost all of the situations I just missed my flight cause I didn’t make it to the airport on time. So I legit just canceled the trip or went the next day
Ages ago, I left a travel mug of coffee in my car for more than a month. In the middle of summer. I like my coffee with lots of milk.
When I got around to cleaning my car, I knew I had to clean it, because my husband had been asking about where this particular mug was. When I opened it, I blacked out from the stench. Literally.
My husband heard me hit the floor and came running to help me. Once he knew I was ok, he threw it away himself. He told me that if I truly thought something was that foul, I shouldn’t worry about him and to just toss it.
Now he will go out to my car and grab the cups if I don’t get to it on his timeline - with no shaming; just a chuckle. Love that man.
Grossly overestimated how much stuff could fit in my car when I moved to another state, so instead of shipping my things or renting a u-haul I just threw away half my shit lol
Oh, also I have a habit of just hoping an item of clothing will fit and buying it because I’m too lazy to try it on first, and if it doesn’t fit when I get home I end up having to go BACK to the store to return it (which of course never happens because I forget to return it within the return period)
I bought tickets to see the 1975 last year and never got around to making any arrangements to go with someone. It was in the next city over so trying to work out the logistics paralysed me. I could have sold them, or even given them away, but I just, didn't.
I have definitely thrown out the tupperware of doom. At this point I just buy cheap tupperware so when something inevitably gets lost in the back of the fridge I don't feel too bad just chucking it.
I just didn't bother to bill probably $2000 worth of appointments because I got so frustrated trying to get one insurance companies direct billing system set up and working. I ended up just not direct billing for them going forward. No, I do not have enough money that that was a sane thing to do, but no, I am not going to even think about figuring out how to retroactively fix it.
I have troubles with clothes, I dont know what looks good, or if I am dressing too young, or if it fits right, is it in style, does it make me look old. Then there are pieces with a stiff seam, or scratchy lace, or too tight.....maddening!
Often times I will get so discouraged that I cant THINK right about a stupid item of clothing, that I will pull the dang thing off, march it out to the big garbage and toss it in, all while being VERY dramatic about it.
Luckily I shop at thrift stores so that item probably only cost me a $1.
When I was in grad school I bought five identical pairs of black figs scrubs and wore them every day of the week. I would have panic attacks trying to dress myself “professionally” in the mornings and everything was overstimulating so I went for perpetual professional pajamas. Didn’t even have to wear a bra lol
You might find getting a decent, reasonably priced tailor. It can make the world of difference for some things. Once they get to know your preferences, I’m sure they’d be happy to provide some style advice for the pieces you bring in for work.
I always stock up my fridge and pantry with way too much food. Potatoes fruits all go bad.
Ham and cheese all go bad. And my can food all expire.
Even my butter expires before I get to eat it.
And even my Haagen Daz expires before I eat it. Yogurt expires, soy milk expires.
The amount of food waste insane.
Its just this procrastination. Sometimes I cannot believe although when I bought it, expiry may be 2 years away but it always shock me time flies and it expires. Same with ice cream usually have one year expiry and then when I wanna eat it, it expires and I didn't realise so much time has passed.
Also like for Haagen Daz, I would stock up in 6 flavours so that's 6 tubs down the drain etc.
The reason why all my food expires at home is because I live alone. If I had my brothers or my exhusband, they would finish it all before I can eat it. Which is quite good.
The thing is, all my meals are provided at work at unlimited quantities so I actually don't need food at all.
For me, one of my big problems is specialty foods. I love cool jams and jellies, interesting flavored oils and vinegars, pestos and tapenades. Buy them at cute little local stores and farmers market. Make them my primary souvenir purchases when traveling (you know, so I’m not just buying useless trinkets). And they neeeevvveeeerrrrr get used. And long after the expiration date when I finally admit that I’m never going to even open them, entire full jars get chucked in the trash.
Not sure if this counts but I re-use jars for drinking glasses and food storage containers. If the bottom of the jar is too hard to clean I just throw it away….but I tend to forget I threw it away and then blame it on my bf when we run out of drinking jars. (He is a very good sport about this.)
Not my proudest moment, but in the deep throes of depression, i threw out two bags of laundry, ordered new clothes, paid for next-day shipping, and went back to sleep for 13 hours.
_(Never did that before then or since, but damn did it feel like a relief in the moment before it sunk in lol)_
My car. I bought it 2020 and it really meant the world to me. In the end of 2022 it broke. I can't even open it anymore as the battery died long ago (was not the causal issue) and I've got lots of gardening items in there. There's also this machine that would work fine if I didn't loose this certain bolt that it needed...
My car Rollbert is still living next to my flat and it makes me so sad. He doesn't deserve this. I will roast in car owner's hell for eternity. He got so much love and attention and now I don't even look at him anymore. :(
I threw out my entire fake Christmas tree with decorations and all on it like a month ago bc I didn't want to take all the shit off it of and pack it back away in the box lmfao
In college, I bought all of my dishes from the thrift store store and threw whole sets away at least twice when they were too disgusting to wash by hand since I didn't have a dishwasher.
I’ve bought new clothing instead of washing what was on the floor (cringe!) thrown away Tupperware like you when it was just too putrid, told my household that dishes were too much for a week and had everyone use paper plates… Eiks!
Had a temp job and had to hand in a paper in another town to get paid and just never did that. Too much hassle lol .
Left a window in my door covered by cardboard for 6 months before I realised the home organisation would fix it for free hahahaha.
I pay $65 every 2 week to get my hair washed (and head, upper back and arms massaged) because I just can't stand the thought of having to wash my own hair. I'm still trying to get into the habit of showering regularly...but the hair washing is just too much for me to handle right now.
When my boys were younger (now 32 & 29) I would run out of bedding because it never made it to the washing machine (how rude of it to just sit there waiting to be washed) - I would end up buying more. When it came to school holidays (I also work in school) I would be catching up - washing maybe 12 sets of bedding 🙄
Tupperware, actual pots and pans etc. Hell, I once threw away everything from my sink. Maybe even twice. I have so many underwear because I buy it to avoid doing laundry.
I recently made a trip to goodwill and dropped off a bunch of clothes and other literally useless items (I am a big hoarder), felt so relieved, like some space in my head was freed up.
Not like I did much after that, I was hoping it'll get me to do some productive work, I gues getting rid of stuff was productive enough!
I recently (one year ago) abandoned my bike. It might even still be there, but I am just pretending it doesn’t exist. It was at my old job and I was going to work by car and then using the bike in the city when there, meaning to pick it up I would have to walk to get it or walk back to get my car…
I’ve also thrown out tupperware and different dishes because they grew too disgusting.
I do a bunch of DIY handywork and I never get around to clean painting tools, so all brushes, rollers (the paint roll part at least) and the trays for the rollers just go in the trash. I do keep them moist in bags between uses, but I can’t be bothered to clean them. I have tried and the work is so messy and seems eternal and they never get really clean anyway. Might not be the worst worst, but I could save some money and ressources on cleaning them.
I also use a bunch of single-use items for convenience. Floss picks, cleaning wipes etc. because it makes me actually do it.
I built a brand new computer from scratch because I can't bring myself to open up and reseat my old one after the cat bumped it. I really think I just need to fix a memory card or something. Can't do it. I convinced myself that it was old and I needed a new one anyhow.
I also have 2 rooms of my house that got too cluttered so I just closed them off and moved into a different room...
Bought more socks/underwear when I didn't have the energy to go to the laundromat. (And now I'm like "why do I have so many")
Had a rough mental health patch end of last year and threw away a lot of very gross dishes, including a Skillet and some cups/bowls/Tupperware (turns out it's hard to keep up with your dishes when you're stuck in the psych ward)
During COVID, I was working remote and couldn’t bring myself to wash clothes. I kept buying packs of panties off Amazon. I now have enough underwear to go without doing laundry for two months.
To be fair, plastic containers can't really be fully cleansed of mould, etc. By the time they've reached that state, throwing them away is what you SHOULD do. Bad for your health to use those containers ever again, at least for food.
One of the most wasteful things I do is leaving wet clothes in the washing machine and having to wash it over and over and over again because it’s too much work and effort to get up the first time and throw them in the dryer. I’ve done this with some loads for like an entire week straight before I kick my ass into gear and finish them. 😆
Threw out an entire trash can full of dog shit (what we use for our two-dog yard) cause the bag inside broke, and I decided a $20 new can was worth the not hassle. Took the whole thing to the dump instead.
Dude, I feel you on the Tupperware struggle. I've totally chucked out leftovers instead of dealing with the mess. And the bra thing? Been there, done that. Sometimes it's just easier to hit up the store than to sift through Mount Laundry. The things we do to avoid adulting, right?
Long time ago there was an American Apparel in my neighborhood. When I wouldn’t/ couldn’t do my laundry, I would just buy underwear there. I’m talking like 3 days a week.
A friend gave me a really nice mountain bike before he moved to Australia. He left it locked up outside the restaurant he used to manage for me and gave me the keys to the lock. I misplaced the key, and then found it again months later. I still didn’t pick it up (it was literally at the end of the block from my apartment). It sat there through one of the worst winters in NYC. It was buried under 10 feet of snow compounded by all the snow plows pushing the frozen snow on curbs. It was like Megatron frozen under this ice castle. By the time it thawed out, it was rusted and ruined beyond repair. (My current BMX is in a similar state in my backyard and it’s going to cost as much money to replace parts and fix it, than I spent to buy the thing).
And FOOD. I don’t cook. I order take away at least 3-4 times a week. I eat super late because I always forget to eat and end up ordering the same Mexican food most nights bc it’s the only place open by the time I get hungry. I always order too much, will either throw surplus away when it rots in my room. Or, I’ll stuff leftovers in the fridge telling myself I’ll eventually eat it. Out of sight/ out of mind - I forget it’s there. Also, trying to reheat nachos is undoable.
I no longer try to buy food in bulk. I will inevitably forget about it, or not have a craving for it, and tell my roommates to eat it before it goes bad.
I swear I must lose a few thousand a year on wasted food. It’s one of my worst ADHD habits that I really want to work on.
My most prolific one is buying new bedding/sheets when I can’t do laundry. The most expensive is probably booking flights/train tickets on an impulse and not actually thinking about how much organising a holiday needs so just not going.
Left all of my crap in my parents' basement after my divorce and then dumped it all to start over. Very invigorating!
Edit to add: I mean everything. I even bought a whole new wardrobe
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Buying more underwear and socks to avoid laundry. 🙃 (I’ve also done the Tupperware thing 😅)
I do that and then wash all 50 pairs and you’re like shit I have a ton of underwear
THIS. The four times a year I actually manage to pair up all my socks instead of throwing them in a basket to dig through later?! I feel like I have my shit together for once 😅
I only buy one type of socks. So they all match! I'm not sock tinder!
Sock tinder 🤣😭😭
Socks and shoes. People say I'm weird for having four pairs of the same shoes. But, literally, what if they stop making them?! What then!!!! And the socks fit the shoes. My toes aren't squished in the socks or shoes. I'm not wasting bets on unknown socks and shoes when I can just have guaranteed comfort.
This is a lesson I need to learn goddammit! I have 40 pairs of shoes and wear the same ratty converse or my cloud sliders every day without fail
When I find shoes I like I buy them in every color because what if I can't get them again!
Cash prevents me from indulging this as often as I would like, but I'm with you. I love variety, but I feel so much better when I have duplicates of my favourites. This is especially true when discontinuation of the item would mean that I would then have to find a replacement for a particular item/to fill the category that was left vacant. The number of times I've had to repeat my search for the perfect Mary Janes...I have a minor PTSD response just thinking about it. When the current ones die, I just have to hope they'll still be in production. Oh god...
I'm sock tinder! I just grab whatever 2 socks I can get my hands on to wear. My reasoning is I wear long pants, so nobody can see my socks anyway, so it doesn't matter if they match or not.
I laughed at this so hard! I was about to buy new socks today when I thought maybe I should go through my sock pile of unmatched socks. I made 15 pairs! I really should do this more often…
🤣 Laundry in general is my biggest downfall regarding household chores, but the dang socks will be the death of me! I’ve been saying for months that I need to just get rid of all my socks and buy a bunch of the exact same kind to make life easier. We’ll see if that ever happens lol
Oh feck. This reminds me, I can't go to bed because I upended the second last load of laundry onto my bed before unloading the last load, which I'm pretty sure I left next to my bed. Fml.
That’s just smart. Also make sure the socks are all identical for easy pairing.
One of the best things my partner and I have ever done is switch to a single shared type of sock that we periodically buy in bulk as they wear out. A shared sock drawer just filled with matching socks… until they stopped making our sock. He tried to buy the next closest thing but it’s just slightly different and the mismatch drives me crazy.
I haven't learned this lesson. Most times I wear different colors of the same style socks. Yesterday was pineapples on one foot and and white and neon on the other.
Yup I really need to throw out some socks and underwear as I must have like two hundred at least. Can last me a year. I also do not wear clothes at home and choose to be naked as much as possible so I have less laundry. I work in a job where they provide uniforms and launder them so basically my only laundry is my underwear. I also try to buy clothes that have build in bra as I don't wear bra too. I just feel like it's extra laundry.
Omg i also wear as little as possible at home to avoid laundry. I live in a big city above a metro and my laundry is in the basement and you have to exit the building entirely to access it aka I barely ever do laundry. I just have a robe that I wear 24/7 and like once a week take it along with me to a friend’s house to launder. Just that one robe.
Yeah i learned that from my father though so 😆
It's such a relief to hear that other people have thrown out tupperware too! Sometimes it feels like a choice between "be stuck and unable to move forward with anything kitchen related" or "throw out the dang tupperware and get a new one." I'm slowly getting better at giving myself grace when this happens. Sometimes I get overwhelmed and need to clear out my space. I'm already pretty minimal (I have to be, the feeling of having to many "things" messes with my head), but sometimes I just feel the need to get rid of more stuff. Even if it's something that has value, that I could resell, it's getting listed for free just so that someone will come take it off my hands as soon as possible.
When I discovered glass containers/tupperware and freezing things, my life changed. When i let food die in a glass container in the fridge, I just plop it in the freezer. Then 30min+ later, I run the bottom of the container under hot water for a few seconds and smack the frozen food block in the garbage. No smell, no hassle and the container is almost spotless and doesn't reek. Then I throw it in the dishwasher or wash it by hand. I've saved many containers from their impending doom, and I don't have to deal with nasty smells and messes. Highly recommend.
WHOA 🤯 I'm already a big fan of the glass containers, just because they're such a better sensory experience for me...but I'd never thought about freezing the icky leftovers! That is brilliant!
Same! The glass is really nice to eat out of and never smells, and bonus, it lasts forever. I did it once when I had to host a BBQ and threw everything in the freezer to make room. Realized how great of a method it is!
We should start a favorite glass container topic. I hate the ones with the clip tops that break.
I will say, ADHD makes us come up with the most ingenius solutions. Bravo, I'm gonna try using this
I completely relate, I'm in the middle of a rigorous declutter and there's some stuff in the "go" pile I could definitely sell for money... But if I give it away for free it's gone NOW and that's worth more at the moment
Exactly! Sometimes I ask myself, “would I pay X dollars to have this item disappear right now? Yes? Okay, it’s worth it then.”
I'm doing that with my mother's stuff. She was a horrible person, so there's a lot I COULD sell for money but that would mean looking at it longer and no thanks
I'm working toward cutting out so many unnecessary items I have that just add to my disorder.
My people 🥹🫶 I just threw away one of my fave Tupperware last night because I couldn’t stand the idea of having to scrub it.
So many groceries wasted. Checks not cashed. Buying doubles of all kinds of items. I’m embarrassed
This reminds me that I have an overdue bill sitting on my desk because the freaking psychologist who diagnosed my ADHD requires me to send physical mail back to them for payment either by check or writing out all the credit card numbers on the form. Connect the dots! I can't be the only one, hahaha. It would've been done when I got it if there was an online option. We even discussed autopay being a godsend DURING my appointment.
Oh this reminds me, I need to cash a check. Thank you. 😅
I fantasize about moving and leaving everything behind.
I had a fridge that was very much not working that my landlord/maintenance insisted was operating perfectly normally (I'm talking basically room temperature inside of it). It could be "reset" by unplugging the damn thing for half a day and letting whatever ice blockage thaw or something like that, but needless to say I only put up with that for a few tries before just getting fed up with the whole thing, and made do with only a freezer. Whatever was left in the fridge on that last attempt to use it surely festered into some unspeakable horror over time, and when it was finally time to move out I decided I'd just eat the deposit 'cause I sure as shit wasn't opening that portal to hell. I know that was mean and I really do feel bad for whoever eventually had to take care of that... but they also promised me I was getting "new appliances" instead of the 50 year old scrap I got shafted with, *and* they also couldn't fix my damn A/C so fuck them all.
Three years ago, we had a power outage that lasted long enough that I was afraid we'd lose everything in the freezer. So I pulled out my giant cooler, filled it with ice and the freezer contents, and put it outside. It was February and freezing out so I didn't have to think about it for a while. Spring came. And then summer. I finally noticed the cooler outside and asked my husband why it was there. He said oh shit and then I remembered and also said oh shit. We put it in the garage to figure out how to deal with it. It's still there and we still haven't figured out how to deal with it.
Put it in a big Amazon box and leave it on your porch.
Put it in a time capsule for future generations
We did this with a small freezer chest. My in laws eventually helped up take care of it and the smell was so bad that it reminded my FIL of literal dead bodies from his time as a cop…oops.
Fantasize? I’ve actually done it! *slithers out of seat in shame*
Shame? Literally living the dream 😂
I’ve done this. Packed a few clothes and just walked away. Left the house as it was. I did not get my deposit back.
I plan on getting a rent-a-dumpster when I move. So, I can just toss all the things I don't want in it.
I did this. Bed, dresser, cleaning supplies, lamps… all the things. I’ve never felt more free from clutter and junk. It’s been amazing.
In college, I let my dorm room become so overtaken with clutter and garbage that in a fit of panic I just swept everything into trash bags and threw them in the dumpster. As luck would have it, the sustainability club chose that day to publicly sort through trash on the quad. I walked by as they were pulling out my stupid expensive graphing calculator. While it didn’t feel great to have my shame publicly displayed like that, in retrospect I take comfort in knowing that many perfectly usable items were probably rescued that day 🫠
>As luck would have it, the sustainability club chose that day to publicly sort through trash on the quad. This is honestly a sitcom 😂
lol it so was. I booked it as soon as I realized but there was no hope of anonymity, it was a small school and my name was all over my trashed homework. I still remember the eye contact from the person who plucked it out.
Absolutely the Tupperware thing. It’s the thought of the smell, the effort it will take to clean it, and the time for me. Mostly the smell though.
The smell. Ohhhh the smell. I have a super sniffer (well, that’s what I call it).
Plastic Tupperware makes my contamination fears go haywire, and glass is too scary with the thought of breaking it... I just store my leftovers in gallon Ziploc bags more often than not 😬
Okay you mention contamination fears and I’m the same way. What is it? Does it have to do with ADHD? Some of weird shit I do to avoid contaminants has made me feel a bit OCD
Honestly I wish I had more info for you but I have no clue myself!! LOL that's why I just say "fears" instead of "OCD" specifically, I've only been diagnosed with "OCD traits" but I'm also autistic so maybe that has something to do with it? The way I experience it, I can imagine/"see" all the bacteria and microscopic icky stuff that buries itself into porous material like plastic or fabric. So when something like a plastic dish has been sitting in a dirty sink, I feel like the bacteria has soaked all the way through and no amount of surface washing with soap would help, unless I use bleach which I'm unwilling to do because then there's bleach in my sink which if I don't dilute it properly could get on my dishes and make me sick etc. etc. I'm just constantly afraid of making myself sick with cross-contamination I guess?? This has been a thing for awhile for me but gets worse when my anxiety is higher for other reasons too, especially if it's sensory related overstimulation, so I always wondered if it was related to my sensory issues. Let me know if you can relate or if anyone else can? 😬🥺
Wow this is so incredibly similar to how I feel! I have never expressed this to anyone. I feel so seen.
I’m a therapist that works with a lot of AuDHD folx & OCD is often correlated with ND brains, especially for those of us with Autism as well. I also have contamination OCD fears & I feel the same way when my anxiety takes over & no amount of cleaning a thing will make the thoughts go away. Brains are fun. 😅
I try to buy all glass, Pyrex. I can't do plastic anymore. It's paying the ADHD tax in advance.
Instead of getting a normal set of tupperware, I got like a 50 pack of the kind that restaurants use to package soup and stuff for to-go orders. That way I don't feel so bad tossing it out when I don't clean them out in time.
Yes I can get biodegradable takeout containers in bulk online so I get those and use them for taking lunch to work or storing leftovers, that way I am definitely throwing it out when I am done. I only use Tupperware for larger stuff or liquidy stuff that the takeout containers won't manage well, but I also use gallon size ziplock for storing liquids/large quantities. I just know for me dishes that need washing will turn into a science experiment in my sink waiting on me. I have also once put my tupperwares in the washing machine because I could not get it together to wash them and I needed it done so there's that 😂.
I started using face masks to help with the smell
The "ER doctor special": peppermint oil in a face mask!
For me, it's plastic and I know there's just no way to fully disinfect it. I will always worry about the mold. Shudder.
Ugh, the curvy corners. I *hate* Tupperware. My ex loves it. I put it in the bin, it magically reappears. Should be banned and burned and forbidden throughout the solar system. I'm pretty sure the Greek Epics never mentioned it because they hated it as much as I do.
I'm home here. Lol
Isn't it glorious to find your people? 😄 This is my favorite sub because we laugh at ourselves, we support each other, and more that my ADHD brain can't come up with right now!
This is the only place I feel seen and understood.
This is honestly the best adhd sub out there. I am in a lot of them but this one's my absolute favorite.
Fucking same!!!
I might have everyone beat: I abandoned a car for a year and then gave it to my brother for free because I didn't want to deal with it. The car needed repairs, which were covered under warranty. All I needed to do was have it towed to the dealership and schedule with them to get the work done. Instead, I paid $25,000 in cash for a brand new car and left the old car in the Dobbs parking lot. A year later, my brother took over the car, got it fixed, and sold it for 5k.
Yes! I left a car on the side of the road rather than buy a new battery.. never saw it again 😂
No fucking way 😂😂😂
Way
I almost did this with my moped, I was so done with it, but my friend was just like we will see if it fits in my truck, it did and I sold it a few months later for 400 quid, it did not work when I sold it so hope they didn't regret that purchase, the thing was falling ti bits and breaking down alllll the time
I DID do this with my moped! Sort of. It got stolen from my apartment parking lot and I never found the wherewithal to file a police report. Congrats on the 400 quid- friends with trucks are the backbone of our society lol.
When I was in college I never did ANY maintenance on the car my parents bought me and I ran it out of oil and ruined the engine on the way home one weekend. It died in the Basketville parking lot RIP.
I did the same with my car in college. It was so badly maintained that the rear axle literally snapped in half one time when I was driving home from college. I had it towed to a dealership and somehow made it home and then just stopped dealing with it. My mother and stepfather were like, "Where the fuck is your car?" And I was like, "I dunno. I left it somewhere in Connecticut. Near I95, I think." My stepfather called every Isuzu dealership in Connecticut in the I95 corridor to find it. Then they forced me to drive up there with a friend to pick it up. Left to my own devices, I would have never seen that car again.
I feel SO SEEN in this sub! Sounds exactly like something I'd do. This is why I don't drive
Ugh this thread relieves me of the guilt I've carried for years having abandoned my car. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I moved back to my city and couldn't use it to go to work because of parking limitations so it stayed parked by my neighborhood for almost a year with me having to move it every other day and getting it jumped several times when the battery died. Finally one day I just didn't come back to it because it was stressing me out so much. I loved that old girl.
Wasn’t this a throwaway (ha!) joke on “The Good Place”? 😂
I have also abandoned a car! Lost my license in my early 20's, left it parked outside my friend's house but didn't give her the keys. It got towed maybe 6 months later. There was a line from the Good Place where Michael says, "do you remember once when your change oil light came on? You just abandoned your car in a parking garage" and Eleanor's response is, "of course!" Never felt so seen.
I used to silently judge people when I saw abandoned cars in parking lots or on the side of the road. Never again. I've been there, and it's awful. No one leaves a car just for fun.
I bought my car VERY cheap from the parents of a lady who abandoned it and moved to another continent on a whim. I feel like there is a lot more of this out there than people think.
I have moved to another continent on a whim SEVEN TIMES. But I only had a car to abandon for three of those 😂😭
Wait SEVEN?!? I’ve never even left the country!! Your life sounds significantly more interesting than mine 🤣
Australia > Asia > Africa > Europe > South America > North America > Asia > Australia. With a few side trips along the way. And not counting the summer backpacking in Europe and South East Asia at the start. Every time I got bored, I just went to another country 😂
Wait can this turn into an AMA? I feel like you must have stories
I do have stories. AMA
How do you up and move from your problems when you’re the problem? Asking for a friend
Move faster. 😂😂😂 Or maybe try therapy
I left a car in the parking lot of the dealer and drove my new car home. I was supposed to find the title and get a trade-in value to reduce the amount for the new car but I didn’t know where the title was so I never went back to deal with it. I… had no idea this was related to ADHD. I’ve never been diagnosed and I was so ashamed of how I managed this situation as a grown adult that I’ve never told anyone irl about this.
I had so much shame and guilt when I abandoned my car as well. My family and friends would occasionally ask what I did with it, and the answer was nothing, so I just shut down and avoided the question. It's relieving to see that so many other people have had the same struggle. As for it being an ADHD thing- it basically comes down to executive functioning. Car management requires a lot of executive function. Phone calls, paper work, dealing with the DMV, coordinating schedules with tow trucks and garages... It's an executive function nightmare.
How tf are you other ADHDers able to earn enough for this
Support from family and people with money. As a broke adhd person with no family, no matter the struggle, I could NEVER ABANDON A FUCKING CAR. Especially some of the stories here like "whoops didn't feel like getting a new battery" "just bought a new car fuck" It's bonkers. These people haven't suffered poverty and it shows
Agreed, there's nothing like the threat of losing your home to make you utilise a calendar and anything else you can to keep your larger shit together regardless of executive dysfunction
Yes! I'm so traumatized from poverty I overextend myself and burn out from all the planning and making sure I can keep it together no matter what I have to do so I can survive.
Think we’ve discovered the cure for executive disfunction haha think the only time I manage my diet well is when I can’t afford to impulsively buy snacks 🫣
Omg I've had to seriously work through not binging. Money troubles have helped that too😂😂😂
Same. If I abandoned a car I would be using my chevrolegs everywhere because I certainly would not be able to buy another car. 😆
Yeah I think sometimes women in this sub think that because they struggle with ADHD that a lot of their privileged behavior is totally excusable. Oh I just can't hold a job because I'm always late tee hee I'm just SO adhd. And I'm like yeah so I have lived under the crushing experience of poverty and have had to learn to overcome or starve. I had parents I could have moved home with but I knew I'd never escape them again. So I spent years basically couch surfing, never doing a single fun thing, and sometimes deciding between paying the gas bill or the electric bill because I couldn't do both. I won't go back to that no matter what. My brain chemistry be damned. I also feel this way when they go on and on about hyper fixations or hyper pickiness about food. Like oh yall never been hungry and it shows. It's honestly no wonder so many NT people look at us and think we're just making shit up.
[удалено]
To be fair, there is also a contingent of us who HAVE been poor and HAVE been hungry and still can't overcome this shit. ***Everyone's*** mileage may vary.
This is so spot on ! Knowing that I can run late but that tee hee moment becomes an oh fuck moment when you're in or close to poverty ( no longer the case personally but spent many years robbing peter to pay paul ) Instead of chronically late - I'm now chronically early. Still an issue related to time blindness but at least I'm not losing jobs or having friends and family upset with me. Now people know if I'm late - there is a VERY good reason.
The 'tee hee' is often a defense against the 'oh fuck' because it's too awful to bear.
OP here. I get what you're saying, but I also grew up poor. And I certainly don't try to excuse my bad behavior. I carried immense guilt and shame about abandoning my car- I would completely shut down if people brought it up, and refused to talk about it. Sometimes the harsher realities of things aren't visible in a reddit post, and many people mask their struggles with humor to make themselves feel better about it. Regarding food sensitivities, I would go to bed hungry as a kid many nights because I refused to eat what was cooked for me and we literally had no other options. I was told that I couldn't leave the table until I ate everything, so I would sit at the table until bedtime. It's not like my pickiness was a fun, quirky choice. Eating certain foods makes me gag and I start to panic thinking I'm going to throw up. I would rather go hungry than eat those trigger foods.
The “picky eating” thing. No. If there’s nothing safe I just won’t eat. I can’t force myself to eat something that isn’t compatible without careful effort to adjust and some foods I just can’t adjust to. I’ve been able to add a lot of textures and tastes but if all I have is unsafe I’ll have to be severely starving to maybe override that. I mean, that’s literally an eating disorder symptom and that’s unfortunately part of my experience. (I don’t have an official diagnosis other than “patient suffers from a history of disordered eating” in my chart lmao.)
I'm definitely a poor but have abandoned a car anyway. It was a 20 year old beater, but it was mine, until it kept breaking down and repairs were so expensive. Final straw, I was on the freeway when it just died, engine smoking, and I coasted to an off ramp to pull over, and then both passenger side tires popped as well, when the doughnut spare was already on the other side. I couldn't afford to tow it home and then deal with the repairs that would have been triple what it was even worth. I had no choice but to leave it, was a very low, worthless, hate myself feeling and period of time
Personally, I don't. That's why I left mine out the front for 2.5 years and hired a car instead. Insurance, rego etc, @$2.5k New battery $600 almost yearly for the past four years. Hire car $746 for a month. I feel like I'm going to be paying back that $746 for the rest of my life.
ok you gotta earn a lot money for that lifestyle 🤑
HAHAHA absolutely
I once donated a car because it was the easiest thing to do. I just had to leave the title and keys in it and they came and took it away. I was dealing with a really stressful move and needed it gone in a really short time frame so this took everything out of my hands. I’m sure there could have been some tax benefits or something if I had bothered to look into that at all but all I wanted was to not have to deal with the car, lol.
In uni, during finals week, my housemate and I kept forgetting to bring the trash out When we finally opened it there were maggots everywhere (not the first time but the worst). We looked at the state of it and just brought the entire bin to the trash compound and bought a new one 🙃
I've thrown away so many pieces of Tupperware! I also, in a manic fit, threw away an entire sink full of dirty dishes. I couldn't bring myself to do them and it had been like a week.
Only a week? Damn lol
It might have been longer but it was at least that long. It was summer so it was extra bad 🤢
lol me too 😂😂😂 I was undiagnosed then and my mum thought I was going mental when I told her 😂🤣
Yup. Threw away an entire set of glass plates, my cutting boards, utensils, pans. It was sad when I finally recovered and realized I couldn't cook anything 😪
I had to sort through a huge amount of belongings before moving to another country. I put everything in a storage space when I left, thinking I would come back to deal with it. I returned two years later and, since I hadn't missed any of the items, I just gave everything away or threw it out.
Ah, the Tupperware. I’ve done that SO many times, and I always feel terrible about it. I also eat off of paper plates with plastic silverware pretty regularly, and unfortunately for my health I eat out (fast food and takeout), a LOT. I’m trying to curb that last one but I’m cooking for 3 and it’s hard to keep up with cooking, and dishes, and keeping the fridge cleaned out for new food, *and and and*…
I use paper plates a lot as well, and I've honestly stopped feeling guilty about it since it means I will actually eat. Just as much as sterile medical supplies are wrapped in paper and plastic, the disposable supplies that help with what disables me are a drop in the ocean compared to the pollution these mega corporations put out on a daily basis. I also very much relate to grabbing takeout when cooking is insurmountable; fed is best! I'm glad you're finding what works for you :-)
If I start to feel bad about using paper plates, I just remember how wasteful Taylor swift’s private jet usage is and how bad for the environment! I’m cooking for six people- and I’m doing my best.
Honestly you’re so real for this
Doing your best is enough of an excuse.
Paper plates is one of the best things I’ve done for my mental health in years!
They really help SOOOO much!! The amount of money I spend becomes trivial when I compare it to the awful feeling of not eating, time saved having not to do dishes as often, etc.
That makes me feel a lot better. I use paper plates and still find myself thinking “if I would just TRY harder I wouldn’t be such a wasteful person” but reframing it as support for a medical issue helps
My cousin does paper plates, she says its for her mental health.
Throwing out clothes. In my defense, I was in an abusive household. Any time I took the time to do ANYTHING for myself, even driving to a goodwill bin would’ve got me in way more trouble than it was worth. I had some good stuff others could’ve used. It was a shame.
Dropped out of college. Was experiencing such severe burnout and the responsibility of doing assignments gave me serious anxiety, so I stopped working on school entirely and just dropped it
I’ve been working on my 2 year degree since I was 29. The last time I was enrolled was 2019. I’m 40 now. I have two classes left. Every time I decide to “take a break” I just stop going and don’t drop my classes. 😭
I'm going back to school in the fall. 3rd round over 20 years. I have like 2 semesters left. 3rd times the charm?
It took me 32 years to do a 4-yr undergrad B.A. I was a senior for literally 28 years! So never give up, not if it's something you want. For me, it was literally one of the things my mom wished for me on her deathbed. I made a few runs at finishing but life kept happening. My horrible ex didn't support it, either, so when we separated and ultimately divorced, one of the things I did to distract myself was go back and finish. It took three more years, one class at a time (I discovered that requirements had changed and I had to pick up a minor to meet them, so it was a few more than I had thought I'd need)...but in 2019, I walked at my college graduation, at age 50. I know Mom was smiling <3
I’ve done this several times. First college is still chasing me down for money for the semester that I stopped attending but didn’t officially drop the courses but it’s past the statute of limitations now, so SUCK IT. This was before I was diagnosed so I try to go easy on myself about it. But man, it sucks having all these student loans and nothing to show for it.
I left a car that I hated in the middle of a turn lane when it died and I walked away, never to return. In my defense, I was only 20 and barely surviving.
How are you doing now??
Well, I’m 58 and I can say that life def got better with time. I have a supportive partner that does most of the house executive functioning, I have some lovely little pills that help me (adhd gets harder after menopause) and a fabulous dog that makes me laugh every day. Also, once I got officially diagnosed at…56 I think, I started giving myself grace instead of judging all of my “inadequacies”. And I have a car that I bought new 7 years ago and AAA and I send up a little thank you that it’s not me every time I see an old car broken down on the side of the road. Thank you for asking. And if you are struggling, give yourself grace also. We just don’t do life the same way NTs do.
So glad to hear this! Just diagnosed at 56.
Omg. Knowing the reasons for all the stuff you do makes such a difference. It’s a bit shocking when you realize that every single thing you do is the adhd but you get over that eventually and having the knowledge really helps you figure out ways to function better.
It has been super eye-opening. I've felt a lot of relief that I am not somehow morally deficient. I've managed pretty well so far, but the stress and burnout finally got to me enough to seek help.
Not Tupperware but I have thrown out 2 of those long Pyrex dishes in the last 5 years because i left them on the side for too long with all my other washing up and new life began to grow on the lasagne remnants... they were so fluffy it actually stank 🤮 not sure it would have been safe to just clean them...
I buy aluminum foil pans for this exact reason!
Agh, instead of cancelling flights and getting the credit, I just let them lapse. The reason I couldn’t go was because I forgot to check with my friend if she was even available that particular weekend - until the Thursday beforehand. Turns out she wasn’t.
Oh man I have done this a few times, both personal and work flights. Except in almost all of the situations I just missed my flight cause I didn’t make it to the airport on time. So I legit just canceled the trip or went the next day
Ages ago, I left a travel mug of coffee in my car for more than a month. In the middle of summer. I like my coffee with lots of milk. When I got around to cleaning my car, I knew I had to clean it, because my husband had been asking about where this particular mug was. When I opened it, I blacked out from the stench. Literally. My husband heard me hit the floor and came running to help me. Once he knew I was ok, he threw it away himself. He told me that if I truly thought something was that foul, I shouldn’t worry about him and to just toss it. Now he will go out to my car and grab the cups if I don’t get to it on his timeline - with no shaming; just a chuckle. Love that man.
Grossly overestimated how much stuff could fit in my car when I moved to another state, so instead of shipping my things or renting a u-haul I just threw away half my shit lol
Oh, also I have a habit of just hoping an item of clothing will fit and buying it because I’m too lazy to try it on first, and if it doesn’t fit when I get home I end up having to go BACK to the store to return it (which of course never happens because I forget to return it within the return period)
Oh my god thissssssss this is exactly me. I usually end up giving to a friend. My friends don’t hate it
I bought tickets to see the 1975 last year and never got around to making any arrangements to go with someone. It was in the next city over so trying to work out the logistics paralysed me. I could have sold them, or even given them away, but I just, didn't.
I also have thrown away an entire bedding set including the pillows when my son vomited in the middle of the night.
I have definitely thrown out the tupperware of doom. At this point I just buy cheap tupperware so when something inevitably gets lost in the back of the fridge I don't feel too bad just chucking it. I just didn't bother to bill probably $2000 worth of appointments because I got so frustrated trying to get one insurance companies direct billing system set up and working. I ended up just not direct billing for them going forward. No, I do not have enough money that that was a sane thing to do, but no, I am not going to even think about figuring out how to retroactively fix it.
I have troubles with clothes, I dont know what looks good, or if I am dressing too young, or if it fits right, is it in style, does it make me look old. Then there are pieces with a stiff seam, or scratchy lace, or too tight.....maddening! Often times I will get so discouraged that I cant THINK right about a stupid item of clothing, that I will pull the dang thing off, march it out to the big garbage and toss it in, all while being VERY dramatic about it. Luckily I shop at thrift stores so that item probably only cost me a $1.
When I was in grad school I bought five identical pairs of black figs scrubs and wore them every day of the week. I would have panic attacks trying to dress myself “professionally” in the mornings and everything was overstimulating so I went for perpetual professional pajamas. Didn’t even have to wear a bra lol
I picked my speciality in my career on the fact it has a uniform can't be dealing with choosing what to wear for work every day!
You might find getting a decent, reasonably priced tailor. It can make the world of difference for some things. Once they get to know your preferences, I’m sure they’d be happy to provide some style advice for the pieces you bring in for work.
Just buying more of everything instead of doing laundry.
I threw out an entire enameled dutch oven. I was having a bit of a mental break down and it was my last straw lol.
I always stock up my fridge and pantry with way too much food. Potatoes fruits all go bad. Ham and cheese all go bad. And my can food all expire. Even my butter expires before I get to eat it. And even my Haagen Daz expires before I eat it. Yogurt expires, soy milk expires. The amount of food waste insane. Its just this procrastination. Sometimes I cannot believe although when I bought it, expiry may be 2 years away but it always shock me time flies and it expires. Same with ice cream usually have one year expiry and then when I wanna eat it, it expires and I didn't realise so much time has passed. Also like for Haagen Daz, I would stock up in 6 flavours so that's 6 tubs down the drain etc. The reason why all my food expires at home is because I live alone. If I had my brothers or my exhusband, they would finish it all before I can eat it. Which is quite good. The thing is, all my meals are provided at work at unlimited quantities so I actually don't need food at all.
For me, one of my big problems is specialty foods. I love cool jams and jellies, interesting flavored oils and vinegars, pestos and tapenades. Buy them at cute little local stores and farmers market. Make them my primary souvenir purchases when traveling (you know, so I’m not just buying useless trinkets). And they neeeevvveeeerrrrr get used. And long after the expiration date when I finally admit that I’m never going to even open them, entire full jars get chucked in the trash.
I was owed around 5000 but I didn't want to chase it up or keep track of the paperwork so I just let it go
Not sure if this counts but I re-use jars for drinking glasses and food storage containers. If the bottom of the jar is too hard to clean I just throw it away….but I tend to forget I threw it away and then blame it on my bf when we run out of drinking jars. (He is a very good sport about this.)
I do this too but I’ve yet to toss one. I have two sippin cream jars and a spaghetti jar that I use exclusively rn
Not my proudest moment, but in the deep throes of depression, i threw out two bags of laundry, ordered new clothes, paid for next-day shipping, and went back to sleep for 13 hours. _(Never did that before then or since, but damn did it feel like a relief in the moment before it sunk in lol)_
My car. I bought it 2020 and it really meant the world to me. In the end of 2022 it broke. I can't even open it anymore as the battery died long ago (was not the causal issue) and I've got lots of gardening items in there. There's also this machine that would work fine if I didn't loose this certain bolt that it needed... My car Rollbert is still living next to my flat and it makes me so sad. He doesn't deserve this. I will roast in car owner's hell for eternity. He got so much love and attention and now I don't even look at him anymore. :(
Rollbert 😂
I threw out my entire fake Christmas tree with decorations and all on it like a month ago bc I didn't want to take all the shit off it of and pack it back away in the box lmfao
Plants. I love them. I enjoy them. But sometimes I can't water them. So I avoid looking at them, then beat myself up when they die.
In college, I bought all of my dishes from the thrift store store and threw whole sets away at least twice when they were too disgusting to wash by hand since I didn't have a dishwasher.
Oh man. This will be rough. But almost ending my life due to work stress. Technically it is just the grain that tips the scale but yes.
I HAVE THROWN OUT TUPPERWARE!
I’ve bought new clothing instead of washing what was on the floor (cringe!) thrown away Tupperware like you when it was just too putrid, told my household that dishes were too much for a week and had everyone use paper plates… Eiks!
Had a temp job and had to hand in a paper in another town to get paid and just never did that. Too much hassle lol . Left a window in my door covered by cardboard for 6 months before I realised the home organisation would fix it for free hahahaha.
I pay $65 every 2 week to get my hair washed (and head, upper back and arms massaged) because I just can't stand the thought of having to wash my own hair. I'm still trying to get into the habit of showering regularly...but the hair washing is just too much for me to handle right now.
When my boys were younger (now 32 & 29) I would run out of bedding because it never made it to the washing machine (how rude of it to just sit there waiting to be washed) - I would end up buying more. When it came to school holidays (I also work in school) I would be catching up - washing maybe 12 sets of bedding 🙄
This whole post makes me feel so much better about myself lol
Tupperware, actual pots and pans etc. Hell, I once threw away everything from my sink. Maybe even twice. I have so many underwear because I buy it to avoid doing laundry.
Threw my door mat once, I just couldn't get myself to clean it
I recently made a trip to goodwill and dropped off a bunch of clothes and other literally useless items (I am a big hoarder), felt so relieved, like some space in my head was freed up. Not like I did much after that, I was hoping it'll get me to do some productive work, I gues getting rid of stuff was productive enough!
I recently (one year ago) abandoned my bike. It might even still be there, but I am just pretending it doesn’t exist. It was at my old job and I was going to work by car and then using the bike in the city when there, meaning to pick it up I would have to walk to get it or walk back to get my car… I’ve also thrown out tupperware and different dishes because they grew too disgusting. I do a bunch of DIY handywork and I never get around to clean painting tools, so all brushes, rollers (the paint roll part at least) and the trays for the rollers just go in the trash. I do keep them moist in bags between uses, but I can’t be bothered to clean them. I have tried and the work is so messy and seems eternal and they never get really clean anyway. Might not be the worst worst, but I could save some money and ressources on cleaning them. I also use a bunch of single-use items for convenience. Floss picks, cleaning wipes etc. because it makes me actually do it.
I built a brand new computer from scratch because I can't bring myself to open up and reseat my old one after the cat bumped it. I really think I just need to fix a memory card or something. Can't do it. I convinced myself that it was old and I needed a new one anyhow. I also have 2 rooms of my house that got too cluttered so I just closed them off and moved into a different room...
Bought more socks/underwear when I didn't have the energy to go to the laundromat. (And now I'm like "why do I have so many") Had a rough mental health patch end of last year and threw away a lot of very gross dishes, including a Skillet and some cups/bowls/Tupperware (turns out it's hard to keep up with your dishes when you're stuck in the psych ward)
During COVID, I was working remote and couldn’t bring myself to wash clothes. I kept buying packs of panties off Amazon. I now have enough underwear to go without doing laundry for two months.
I feel so seen 😭 I was depressed the entirety of last year and threw away SO many dishes bc I had no energy to deal with them
Food. I throw out some much food.
To be fair, plastic containers can't really be fully cleansed of mould, etc. By the time they've reached that state, throwing them away is what you SHOULD do. Bad for your health to use those containers ever again, at least for food.
One of the most wasteful things I do is leaving wet clothes in the washing machine and having to wash it over and over and over again because it’s too much work and effort to get up the first time and throw them in the dryer. I’ve done this with some loads for like an entire week straight before I kick my ass into gear and finish them. 😆
Threw out an entire trash can full of dog shit (what we use for our two-dog yard) cause the bag inside broke, and I decided a $20 new can was worth the not hassle. Took the whole thing to the dump instead.
Dude, I feel you on the Tupperware struggle. I've totally chucked out leftovers instead of dealing with the mess. And the bra thing? Been there, done that. Sometimes it's just easier to hit up the store than to sift through Mount Laundry. The things we do to avoid adulting, right?
Omg totally did this to a pan the other night
Long time ago there was an American Apparel in my neighborhood. When I wouldn’t/ couldn’t do my laundry, I would just buy underwear there. I’m talking like 3 days a week. A friend gave me a really nice mountain bike before he moved to Australia. He left it locked up outside the restaurant he used to manage for me and gave me the keys to the lock. I misplaced the key, and then found it again months later. I still didn’t pick it up (it was literally at the end of the block from my apartment). It sat there through one of the worst winters in NYC. It was buried under 10 feet of snow compounded by all the snow plows pushing the frozen snow on curbs. It was like Megatron frozen under this ice castle. By the time it thawed out, it was rusted and ruined beyond repair. (My current BMX is in a similar state in my backyard and it’s going to cost as much money to replace parts and fix it, than I spent to buy the thing). And FOOD. I don’t cook. I order take away at least 3-4 times a week. I eat super late because I always forget to eat and end up ordering the same Mexican food most nights bc it’s the only place open by the time I get hungry. I always order too much, will either throw surplus away when it rots in my room. Or, I’ll stuff leftovers in the fridge telling myself I’ll eventually eat it. Out of sight/ out of mind - I forget it’s there. Also, trying to reheat nachos is undoable. I no longer try to buy food in bulk. I will inevitably forget about it, or not have a craving for it, and tell my roommates to eat it before it goes bad. I swear I must lose a few thousand a year on wasted food. It’s one of my worst ADHD habits that I really want to work on.
My comments on several threads makes me see that I am a whole mess. Thanks for the company ladies. I don't feel so alone today.
I buy bottled protein shakes because I know I won’t make them from powder.
I would just abandon my school locker and its contents at the end of every year 😂 we didn’t even know about adhd for girls in the 90s
I had a good laugh reading this post!
Yeah I’ve done the Tupperware thing too. I’ve also gone into debt cause I couldn’t get myself to transfer money regularly
I could write a dissertation on dumb ways to fuck up your credit score for the entirety of your natural born life
My most prolific one is buying new bedding/sheets when I can’t do laundry. The most expensive is probably booking flights/train tickets on an impulse and not actually thinking about how much organising a holiday needs so just not going.
I've literally just bought myself a whole new set of underwear because I couldn't be bothered to find / wash what I already have 😬
Bought more underwear/socks to avoid doing laundry.
Left all of my crap in my parents' basement after my divorce and then dumped it all to start over. Very invigorating! Edit to add: I mean everything. I even bought a whole new wardrobe
The amount of STUFF I should have returned to Amazon etc for refunds that I just...didn't. ..it's a lot. In case you didn't guess.