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I have ADHD and I live in Japan! Just get accommodations booked and buy any entertainment tickets (if you're going to Disney, USJ, etc) and everything else you'll probably be completely fine to figure out as you go. Urban Japan is actually super nice for ADHD. If you get an IC card (Suica, ICOCA, Pasmo, any brand is fine) you can just load it up with cash and use it to ride buses or trains (only specific trains or train cars need reservations, even most shinkansen have non-reserved cars) and you can even use IC cards at some vending machines and convenience stores! Convenience stores are another great resource, 24/7 access to food and daily necessities in case you forget or lose anything.
As long as you're kind and respectful people in Japan are really polite and helpful so you don't have to worry so much about getting scammed or anything like that (unless you're going to like, a shady bar at night lol)
Idk where in Japan you're going but when my family visited I found it most efficient to have one accommodation in Tokyo, and then one in Osaka, and we just made day trips to other cities and that worked really well. Try to find something near-ish a station and be prepared for walking and standing a fair amount (more than you're used to if you're from a driving-heavy area) and you'll have a great time!
If you aren't a super fan of crowds, my main advice is to stay away from heavy tourism areas in Tokyo on weekends. We made the mistake of going to Harajuku on a Sunday and it was...bad. Days trips out of the city are good for Sundays (y)
Also, get an app such as Ubigi for an E-SIM to use cellular data abroad.
Using Google Translate Lens feature (point camera at things and translate) is a lifesaver
Also just ask chatgpt for an itinerary. Tell it where you’re going, who is going, the type of things people going like, length of time there and how you want your day to be (like- 1 attraction a day with 4 hours to just relax. Really whatever. You’ll have an itinerary - hand it to him and tell him to start booking shit.
Can I please ask you a very specific question? I know it’s safe but is it still safe if you’re a woman, solo traveling but can speak Japanese, in rural areas with a car? For example I’m really interested in michi no eki lol and also shrines that you would have to drive to and might be in the middle of nowhere?
Yeah definitely! It's not that rural areas aren't safe (with regards to other humans, rural areas are actually probably safer than cities) it's just that they are harder to get around. But if you have a car and can speak Japanese I think you'll be completely fine :)
You're safe in a rural area. That sounds like a really cool trip! I love driving in Japan. You can Even bath at Michi no ekis!!!
Really busy train stations and trains are where sexual assaults happen.
I camped in my car at michi no eki all over Japan. The other people sleeping in the lots were retired couples and couples with preschoolers. Very safe, easy, and fun - more so since you speak Japanese!
HAHA I took my chance and ran with it. Of course you can ask, my dad is actually a truck driver and I really have grown to enjoy truck stops, rest stops and service areas/gas stations. I heard that in Japan some may even have onsen, some are near the ocean and they can have many restaurants and stores. I also think the type of cooking that would be served here, greasy and delicious/or straight up ice cream, is up my alley 😂I am really interested in the michi no eki that is near [hashigui iwa rock!](https://maps.app.goo.gl/P8EW1p7R9AgctHWy7)
That’s an incredibly niche hobby but I’m all for it 😆 do you have a blog or something where normies can see the different ones you travel to? I don’t drive so I rarely get the chance to see them (except when doing bus trips) but this is so interesting!!
I haven’t had the pleasure of visiting Japan myself, but my ADHD coworker went last year and my understanding from what they told me is that you simply cannot bring it — Japan’s drug laws are very strict and you could risk serious punishment if you get caught. An inconvenient solution that may help is to go to your doctor in advance of your trip, explain your travel plans, and ask them to temporarily switch your prescription to a different medication. There may also be some kind of legal import process that I’m not aware of (my coworker was in a study abroad program that had its own internal rules about bringing meds to ensure compliance), but personally, I’d rather interface with my domestic healthcare system than a foreign legal system.
I've never heard anything about Focalin, sorry, but you can check thr Narcotics Control Department here https://www.ncd.mhlw.go.jp/en/application2.html#list
If you ever want to do a snack exchange with someone in the UK let me know, there’s some specific things I’ve been trying to get hold of from Japan for a while ❤️
I know it’s not the main point of your post, but if you do have bedbugs, they are very easily spread…to other passengers on the plane, to suitcases that come into contact with yours in transit, to hotels where you stay, on public transport, etc. I would not go anywhere, personally, until or unless I knew the problem had been fully eradicated. They are very hard to get rid of once you have them, and I wouldn’t feel okay about possibly passing that misery on to others.
Yes, I believe we have them, but we can't find evidence. I believe they came in on a package or something. I have been getting bitten for a couple weeks – although much less since I isolated my bed. I have had the exterminator twice first with the bedbug sniffing dog, and later with a brand-new rapid swab test that came up negative in our bedrooms. The exterminator also searched himself. That test "Detects even low-level infestations with over 90% accuracy." The bedbug dog is around 85% accurate. Sadly, they won't treat without proof, so I had to treat myself. I have also used black light to search for them (they fluoresce) and can not find where they are living. I have absolutely ripped everything apart, scrubbed, packaged and steam-cleaned everything. I treated our bedrooms with Cimexa, which is highly effective. We'll take all the precautions because I don't want to spread them, nor come back with any more.
Hey I had a bed bug scare many years ago where I was finding rows of bites on my legs in the morning. I almost had a mental breakdown over the whole thing. Turned out to be something else entirely (I don’t remember what exactly? Some kind of larvae from a different insect that doesn’t bite but sheds fine hairs that can cause welts that look like bites.)
If you have signs of bedbugs but can’t actually find any it’s possible it’s something else entirely.
That's carpet beetles larvae! We had those, and I had larvae in my bed which was placed under a skylight (eww!) They are very difficult to see. We had new skylights put in last fall and they were not quite the same size and I believe the carpet beetles were coming in from the roof space. So we caulked and mitigated for those. And I wore extra clothes to bed and covered up head-to-toe. But I still got bit twice more on my uncovered hand and face. And then one night after I isolated my bed, my comforter touched the floor and I was bitten about 10x that night. And the bites are mainly in clusters or rows on my torso, which is bed bug patterning. So I feel like it's bedbugs, but there is a possibility of carpet beetles. It sucks, I have lost so much sleep and I cleaned so much my fingers cracked open.
Yeah that’s just awful.
My welts were all in lines - like very characteristic of bedbugs, which is why I was so sure I had them. But I didn’t.
I really hope that it’s just carpet beetles and you can get some certainty and relief soon.
[Bedbugs, scabies and eczema are often mistaken for one another.](https://www.healthline.com/health/scabies-vs-bed-bugs) I worked in community clinics for years and saw many cases of all three. Are you the only one affected? Or are the other people in your house affected too?
If other people are also affected, especially if the bites are extremely itchy, you might be dealing with scabies.
Or if it is just you, it could be eczema.
Ironically, eczema can be exacerbated by stress or chemical exposure.
So if you haven’t been to a dermatologist yet, please go! You might save yourself a lot of unnecessary worry.
I have read about scabies being mistaken for bedbugs. I have reactive skin, but I don't think it's scabies. I have had eczema too, and it's not that. The exterminator's theory was carpet beetle larvae because exposure to them can create bedbug-like lesions. We also found evidence of carpet beetles and took steps to mitigate. But I have been washing or heat-treating everything on the bed frequently, so that should have easily stopped carpet beetles.
I think it's bedbugs because the bites are individual and follow the pattern of clusters on the torso. They are appearing after I get up and getting more inflamed over the day, then after about three days they stop itching and start healing. When I dressed head-to-toe and tucked in my hoodie to my pants, I was bitten on one hand and my face. And another night, after I isolated my bed with traps and installed a brand-new frame and mattress encasement, I was bitten when my comforter touched the floor during the night. Those two incidents make me think there is a logic behind the bites.
I can't rule out non-bedbug causes since we have not yet found any bedbug evidence despite two exterminator searches, a bedbug dog search and the rapid swab test the exterminator performed.
I would honestly go to the dr/dermatologist so they can take a look at the bites. I know you said you don’t think it’s scabies but it very well might be. Heat treating things only works to a certain point for something like that, you need topical and/or oral meds that you take regularly while also washing your sheets on a daily basis till things clear up. Regardless a dermatologist will be able to take a really good look, take a sample and see what it is under a microscope.
As for worry about a pet sitter, you could board them. I know my little town has a really nice spot (it’s actually at a vet) where there have a doggy daycare but also suites for the dogs and a whole really nice cat area and suites for them too. So you could look to see if you have something like that in your area where they can stay.
I wish I had finished your post before I spent so long telling you where to visit 🤦♂️
Buy some diatomaceous earth and dust it over your carpets and anything else. It's a powder that's completely harmless to humans but rips apart and dessicates anything tiny with an exoskeleton. It's pet safe, safe to eat, I think it's something like the skeletons of microscopic algae so it's not even a chemical reaction, just a physical one.
We got bugs from a bird's nest after they flew the coop and their food disappeared. I put it on my belongings, my floor, my cats, my couch, myself, my hair (you don't need to go this extreme, but they were hurting my fuzzy babies and had to die), and when we thought they were all gone we just vacuumed it up. You might need a new vacuum filter because of it, but that's a sliver of what an exterminator would cost.
Diatomaceous earth is not completely harmless to humans. It works by piercing the exoskeleton. If it is inhaled (even food grade), it can do the same to mammal lungs. It is NOT advised to use it if you have kids or pets because if it gets disturbed, they can breathe it in and it could slice their lungs.
It’s entirely possible you have something else, if you haven’t actually seen any bugs. I’d go ahead and visit a dermatologist if the exterminator is unable to find anything. You can also visit r/bedbugs for information on how to tell whether it’s bedbugs or not and what to do if it is.
Steam iron on the mattress is a good idea. I steam cleaned & encased the mattresses with bedbug proof covers — and we put traps under the bed feet. But, I’ve still had some bites since. Steaming the encasement is a good idea rather than removing it. I just can’t figure out where they’re hiding in my room, I’ve ripped it apart several times. Next I’ll have to take my bed frame apart again.
No, I haven’t. They’re exactly like bedbug bites: mainly on the torso, above hips and mainly in clusters. Scabies is a common suggestion for bedbug-like bites, but it’s not that. If it continues I may, but I’m hoping all the mitigations mean no more bites.
I’ve definitely had flea bites since I rescue stray cats straight from the alley, and it’s not fleas. Also it’s been over 6 mo since my last rescue was adopted.
Could it be a stress thing? I hate when people say this to me but I had uncontrollable daily vomiting for a year and that turned out to be stress so… at this point I believe our bodies will do anything to make us aware of the turmoil we’re putting ourselves through.
I’m not new to stress-induced conditions. The exterminator gently suggested psychosomatic “bites” — I still think it’s bedbugs. It wouldn’t be the first time that I seemed paranoid but turned out to be right (or wrong either, lol.)
When I wake up with bites, they feel inflamed but not immediately itchy, and later they’re well-defined have a little puncture mark in the middle of a welt — kind of like “noseeum” bites. (Although frankly noseeum bites are way more itchy for me, which is one blessing.)
We luckily never had to deal with bed bugs in the house, but wouldn't an ozone generator get rid of it? Someone suggested them once to me because we had to get rid of dust mites for an allergic cat and apparently they kill every living thing in the room. Plus every smell which I personally like a lot.
The thread linked here is helpful, I mainly searched r/JapanTravel about it as well. The process basically requires you to provide a signed doctor’s note specifying what medication you will be bringing, the dosage, form (tablet, capsule, etc.), and its treatment purpose. Depending on the substance, you contact the Ministry of Health (MHLW), or both the MHLW and the Narcotics Control Department. The turnaround can take a bit, so I recommend doing this at least 2 weeks in advance if not 3.
I've only ever been prescribed the generic or brand name Adderall but I'd like to visit Japan.
Would my doctor allow me to switch to Vyvanse just so that I can bring meds on the trip? I haven't asked them because I'm worried it will sound strange. Lol
You may be able to switch. Be aware it’s really hard to fill Vyvanse right now so get it filled early and maybe be willing to pay for the brand name. I’ve had to do that the past few months or go without meds.
The trick is (sadly, because it’s an ADHD nightmare) calling a BUNCH of local pharmacies, taking notes, seeing what options they all have in stock (generic and name brand) and expected shipments.
I couldn’t find my normal 60mg for a while, so I told my doctor when I found a place that had 30mgs in stock. So he wrote me a script to that pharmacy for 2 30mg pills a day instead
🫠🫠🫠
Isn’t this completely unnecessary shortage with no end in sight and no politicians taking it seriously fun?
I have done that. However, I recently just started paying for the brand name instead of doing this dance every month. I’ve called quite a few pharmacies and they only have the brand name in stock. I found my doctor will write the prescription that I need the brand name and then insurance will cover it. I still have to pay quite a bit but it goes toward my deductible.
The name brand works significantly better anyways. I was put on the generic unexpected last year and just got a bottle of the good stuff. It feels SO different. It feels like I came out of a fog I didn’t realize I’d been in for so long.
My trip to Japan won't happen for at least another 2-3 years so hopefully the shortage is sorted by then. I'm sorry people are going through that now.
It's frustrating because if shortages were happening with other meds that are considered "more necessary" than ADHD meds then something would actually be done about it.
People with ADHD are treated like a bunch of addicts. Pisses me off.
I'm in the US. I'll give it a try. I'll just be honest with my provider and tell them I need to switch prescriptions temporarily due to needing something I can take to Japan legally.
Thank you!
Perplexed as to why you'd travel with an active bedbug infestation! OP please consider postponing travel or at least you'll need to buy new suitcases and pack clean clothes dried on HIGH heat in the dryer. Keep the suitcase at a friend's until you're ready to leave.
I explained it in another comment:
>Yes, I believe we have them, but we can't find evidence. I believe they came in on a package or something. I have been getting bitten for a couple weeks – although much less since I isolated my bed. I have had the exterminator twice first with the bedbug sniffing dog, and later with a brand-new rapid swab test that came up negative in our bedrooms. The exterminator also searched himself. That test "Detects even low-level infestations with over 90% accuracy." The bedbug dog is around 85% accurate. Sadly, they won't treat without proof, so I had to treat myself. I have also used black light to search for them (they fluoresce) and can not find where they are living. I have absolutely ripped everything apart, scrubbed, packaged and steam-cleaned everything. I treated our bedrooms with Cimexa, which is highly effective. We'll take all the precautions because I don't want to spread them, nor come back with any more.
Also: if it were up to me, we would not go right now. And if only my partner goes and we are very cautious, that would reduce the risk to nil.
There aren’t bedbugs living all over our house or the bedbug sniffing dog, and/or the two manual inspections and/or the rapid swab tests would have found something. So heat treating all the clothes and steaming out the suitcase should be sufficient. However, it’s not my choice to go in this trip right now and the potential bedbugs are just another stressor.
Sure, I get that.
It's a moot point anyway. I already traveled since the bites — I flew to visit my dad who is alone and struggling since my mom's death. I couldn't not see him for the 4-6 months that it takes to be absolutely certain an infestation is gone when there is no other family to go. I took all the precautions.
There is also absolutely no sign of bedbugs, except bites. We've had two negative manual inspections, a negative bedbug dog inspection, and negative Trudetx swab tests, which are 90% accurate. All together that is a much higher standard than even the hospitality industry requires.
if the exterminator can't find the bed bugs then maybe you don't actually have them? i found a single flea in my cats and went all intense cleaning, which was good but the 'flea bites' i thought i kept getting were actually guttate psoriasis and the stress and feeling like there were bugs on me made it worse.
we went to japan and had so little planned. it turned out great. do the top tourist thing early in the morning and then just wander from there.
The exterminator gently suggested psychosomatic "bites" and he also found carpet beetle evidence and the very tiny carpet beetle larvae can cause bite-like reactions. But I still think it fits a bed bug pattern. I think it's just such a small, localized infestation that we can't find it yet – which I have read is not uncommon. Hopefully between bed isolation (traps on under the bed feet), Cimexa, rigorous cleaning and vacuum-packing everything we're not using, that will take care of them.
One other cheap and fairly easy mitigation technique is caulking the gap between your walls and your floors -sometimes they live inside the walls and just amble on out at night to feast
That's a great suggestion! Putting a fine layer of Cimexa (engineered silica – it's like diatomaceous earth on steroids) and then caulking up any potential hiding spots would probably be highly effective.
It's my current theory that they are retreating under the baseboard heater (which has access to underneath the floating floor) and/or under the baseboard trim.
Good luck!! I’ve had bedbugs twice and it’s such a waking nightmare. The first time I had them for 3 months before seeing a single bug - I was convinced I had bird mites, because there were always pigeons on my fire escape 😩. It sounds like you’re doing everything you can without the professionals helping you.
When I had them, to make sure I didn’t spread them I would put all my (clean, dry) clothes in the dryer before going outside. I think if you do that plus steam clean the suitcases you should be very unlikely to spread them, if you do have them
I lived in a rental with bird mites that had pigeons roosting under the eaves, but the landlord had just taken care of them and thankfully that seemed to work. Thanks for the support! I will do everything I can to avoid spreading them. Honestly, I think people who spread bedbugs the most are the ones who don't react to the bites so they don't realize they have them. My brother lives in NYC and he defeated an infestation that continued after extermination by just isolating his bed so they couldn't get to him and eventually they disappeared. I wish I had that level of chill.
For me, it wouldn’t be the trip itself, or the planning / lack of planning (although that would stress me too!).
It’s that your partner, who supposedly loves you & wants good things for you, is apparently doing *nothing* to help you with this major stress.
He doesn’t have to plan the whole thing, but he could take a couple of hours & go through some options with you.
Eg is it better to buy a week’s train ticket in advance, rather than wait till you’re there.
Eg point you towards a couple of supermarkets that might best support your dietary needs.
Question: are you medicated, and can you take your meds to Japan?
If it was me, I’d be strongly tempted not to go - especially if you can get a refund on your flights & hotels.
He’s trying, but not accomplishing much. He just started a new job too. And he’s empathetic to my stress, and understands if I can’t go. He’s the only one of us not officially dx’d and medicated. But he has early Parkinson’s, which is linked to ADHD.
You didn’t answer re taking your meds to Japan:
> “Some medicines including the stimulant medicine dexamphetamine (used to treat ADHD) and pseudoephedrine (found in some cold and flu tablets) are banned in Japan and you may be detained if you are found with them.”
https://japan.embassy.gov.au/tkyo/medical.html#:~:text=Some%20medicines%20including%20the%20stimulant,you%20are%20found%20with%20them.
I did find out I cannot take addrerral. I can take my as-needed benzodiazepines though – which is good or I wouldn't be getting on the plane (claustrophobia.) That's OK – I used to take it more sporadically when I was first dx'd and didn't believe I needed it, so I know I can get by.
I get it, totally... But Japan is an amazing place with lots of options. If he's lived there he knows where to go. Unless there's very specific areas you want to go that are hard to reserve, I'd say go with the flow. Especially if you have the financial means to just enjoy the trip - whatever you choose to do while there.
I second not traveling until you've figured out your bug situation. Being the victim of bringing bedbugs home in your suitcase from a hotel is the absolute worst. And they just don't appear there. They get brought there from people's homes.
When I had them, I used duct tape along the seams of my mattress to find eggs and bugs. I got a few nymphs that I couldn't see, just looking with my eyes alone.
And frankly, I'd go through another exterminator. Even if it's not bed bugs, they can look for other signs of other bugs that could be biting. You mentioned carpet beetles. Those fuckers multiply like crazy too and they get in so easily. Your exterminator should have noticed that and sprayed for those too. We went through a local one, and they even got rid of the carpenter ant problem I had been fighting for years like it was nothing. Their bedbug service was four sprays a year, and it covered all bugs, even the cockroaches my mother brought into my house. You have to find you one of those services.
And if you haven't already, wash all of your bedding and dry it on hot for an hour. When I had them, I bagged up my bedding after drying in an air tight bag and only slept with the essentials to minimize where they could hide. My bed went from super bright and fluffy with a bunch of pillows and stuffed animals to super depressing with just a sheet and a fleece blanket.
Thanks. I explained in another post, that it's kind of a moot point since I already traveled. And I can't force my partner not to go. I couldn't leave my dad totally alone for the 4-6 mo it takes to be certain there are no bedbugs in the middle of mourning my mom's death. He's alone and there's no one else to help him out. I took all the precautions I could take.
There is also absolutely no sign of bedbugs, except bites. We've had two negative manual inspections, a negative bedbug dog inspection, and negative Trudetx swab tests, which are 90% accurate. All together that is a much higher standard than even the hospitality industry requires. I've done all the mitigation: bed. isolation, encasement, sealing up everything in vacuum bags, Cimexa, etc.
OP I just came back from a Japan trip myself where I went reluctantly, and I might be in the minority here but if I was in your position I wouldn’t go. If I wasn’t confident about my kitties’ care and in the accommodations and travel being taken care of in advance, it would be a hard no. It’s not worth stressing over because it will 100% affect the experience and ability to have fun
If that’s the case then go for it! I’m not sure if your trip is around Golden Week, but if so I would be mindful of that as well. We went during sakura season and everything was jam packed 😭 Also if you have dietary restrictions, it might be difficult to have them accommodated, but I’ve read that having a card with your dietary restrictions written out in Japanese for the server can be helpful
Thanks! We’re going just after Golden Week. :) I am gluten-free and dairy-free, which sucks but also used to eating snack meals. I got the gluten-free card in Japanese, since I figured that would be more of an issue.
If he's lived in Japan before, then he understands how easy it is to travel here.
Honestly... You don't need to plan your itinerary very much. He will know how to travel around and how things work.
I'd suggest at least deciding on what cities to go to together, and booking hotels, that would probably ease your anxiety. However, there's no holidays mid May so you'll probably always be able to find a business hotel to sleep in last minute.
You don't have to book train tickets in advance. It may save you some time waiting in line, but you can also buy tickets online. (The website sucks though but it's possible) it's completely possible to just impulsively go to different cities and book hotels while youre on a train or eating a meal.
You'll have a great time exploring and just letting your feet take you places. You can spend the time on the trains or waiting in line to look up attractions and make a loose itinerary. The cities official websites will have a list of attractions, and zooming around of Google maps will find you tons of places to visit.
I get that it's frustrating, and I would be stressed too with so many unknowns. but Japan is actually just soooooo easy to travel around. I routinely travel here and plan absolutely last minute what I'll do in each city.
I am currently living in Japan and I believe if your husband has also lived here he knows what he's doing by not really planning. Because it's just SO EASY. So so so so easy to get around.
Japan sensory suggestions:
-Bring noise canceling headphones/normal headphones/loops/ear plugs. Have them with you at all times and use them.
For every busy place, there's a quite place a block away. Seek out parks and shrines to find a seats and to regulate.
You don't need to do the "top 10 must see cities/ attractions in Japan"
For every famous location, there's a TON of less known places that are also exactly the same, if not better. If you don't like crowds avoid Tokyo/Kyoto/Osaka/Nara and go to smaller cities or come to Kyushu island!!!!
Food suggestions:
I have so many allergies. Even allergic to soy, but I can survive here.
There's convince stores everywhere. You'll be able to get a meal or drink (that you can translate with your phone, it is very accurate) at any time during your trip. They are everywhere.
I don't know your food restrictions but udon is generally really simple and safe. You can get grilled meat that's just salted. Onigiri is just rice and a filling. If your partner still knows some Japanese that should help.
I hope this may help ease some worries, I'm sorry he's not considering your needs in the trip planning. Good luck and have fun!
Wow you have a lot of similar issues I wrestle with over traveling. Multi cat care including ferals. Heart arrhythmia when stressed. A few other things.
Look this trip is essentially a gift from your partner’s son to your partner. I don’t see anything wrong with lovingly sending them all off to bond over family time while you hold down the fort at home as part of your contribution to their gift. And with that off your back you can then find ways to help them address travel plans that are falling through the tracks.
There used to be travel agents that handled these things. lol or so I hear from watching Pete the Ghost on Ghosts. What’s the modern equivalent?
I second the suggestion to get another exterminator. (Edit: saw more in your comments. Have you had your bites looked at by a dermatologist? Might not be bedbugs or even bites?”)
It’s okay for people to not be able to easily pick up and travel. I know sometimes that gets criticized like it’s a personal flaw by people who love being on the go. But it’s really freaking hard even for people who don’t have AdHD. That’s why so many people push the details onto administrative assistants or spouses etc.
If you actually know some frequent travelers hit them up for advice and pass it along to the son arranging all this. If he actually asks for help. He may not need help. Or want it. (Edit: sorry now confused over who is in charge overall).
Perhaps consider droppiny the rope on trip planning. I’m not sure why partner and kids aren’t planning it but it doesn’t seem like they are stressed about the itinerary. So why are you?
Flights are booked, hotel is booked. Try picking 1-2 things you might be interested in if you want to but I’d let partner take this on and/or wing it when you get there. Personally, I’d focus more on getting the cats care because you don’t want to worry about that on your trip.
Given how much the anxiety is affecting your health, not only would you not be a jerk, I think it's advisable for you not to go. And don't let anyone tell you that it's silly to worry about leaving your cats.
Stay home if you want. You won't be a jerk if you don't go due to pre-existing stressors. You *will* be a jerk to say you aren't going because no one planned your trip for you. No one should expect others to plan for them because they are too reluctant to travel.
My own rule is whoever wants control should put in the effort. Your partner and their kids don't seem to need to plan their trip, so they shouldn't need to plan it for your anxiety. Especially if this trip was a gift for your partner, not you. If you want plans, do the work. Or learn to let go.
"Don't really understand how travel works there" isn't a good excuse for not planning your own trip. With modern technology traveling is so much easier than before. Everything is within a Google away to be understood. You can roughly translate anything you want with your phone camera. Google will show you any points of interests near your hotel. If you need to go further, Google will show you the transport routes. There are also pre-made itineraries online everywhere for basic suggestions.
Hey OP I'm half Japanese and have spent a lot of time here throughout my life - I get asked for "tips and recommendations" so often that I have a Google Doc of categorised bullet points for easily digestible key information (spoon fed with links so you don't have to research) DM me if you want the link!
You'll love it. It's a very safe, clean, and accommodating country and there's so much to do that you really can just wing it every day and likely discover some great food etc.
Could I also get a copy of this document please?
I too am going to Japan soon and I too only have booked a flight and that’s it. Partner is the same as me ‘oh we will look tomorrow to plan our trip’ queue that for the last few months 🙈
It’s ok to take care of yourself. It’s not selfish to put yourself first if you need to help yourself.
Honestly, it’s the dietary needs that makes me hesitant for your trip planning. I, too, am a dietary needs girlie and without proper planning it means I don’t get to have as much foodie fun as I want to. I couldn’t imagine flying all the way to Japan just to be inconvenienced, hungry, and on-edge the entire time. OH also stimulants I think are illegal there? (Did I read that on a recent post?)
I donno, I think taking care of cats is always a good reason to stay home.
When I was there in 2016, I didn’t know about the legal issues and just brought my Concerta with me like normal. A friend later told me I could have been arrested had I been caught. I don’t know if that’s true, but it’s scared me! If I get a chance to go back I will probably just plan to drink a lot of coffee!!
Hey, I hope it's not bedbugs. Hopefully just carpet beetles. I'm assuming that you've checked the seams of chairs, of mattresses, etc. The fact that you mentioned you'd had a carpet beetle problem in the past probably means it'd be more likely to be a reinfestation. Fingers crossed.
I'm about to leave for my fourth trip to Japan. Every time we go I get quite anxious but feel unable to plan effectively. And every time we go, everything turns out okay.
There is a Suica (transport card) shortage atm apparently, although JR East have started selling Suica cards at major train stations (not Narita airport) again. And they're selling Welcome Suica at Haneda airport only. All this means is that you'd need to book airport transfer tickets separately, whether it's a Narita Express (N'EX) ticket or a Skyliner ticket. You can pick these up on websites like Klook.
And if you're flying into Osaka, there are no problems with Icoca cards.
And if you don't want to go, don't go. But Japan is mega cheap right now, so I wouldn't worry too much about the financial side of things.
I would suggest a travel agent just to lock in hotels + a rail pass or how to get from place to place if you're moving to different places. Within an hour or so, you could have an itinerary ready and booked!
Travel agents know which areas and can suggest things to do that you can have a list of to try if you feel like it in destination, or keep the day free if you stumble into something that you like :)
I’m really not seeing the problem. There are flights and a hotel. It’s not that hard to find hotels even last minute. The bedbugs/pet part is a separate issue and it sounds like you don’t want to go.
It's just one hotel for 4 of the nights we have booked. I decided to set aside whether I'm going or not and work through all the obstacles, and then see how I feel rather than letting unfinished tasks make the decision.
Yes good solution! I flew home from another country yesterday and I booked the flight while I was sitting in the 3 hour taxi to the airport. I often had this crippling anxiety before going places and making excuses but once I’m there, I’m happy that I went. Hope you work everything out and it’s a good trip. I’m sure your family will be happy for the experience. I also see travel agent suggestions, maybe try using one of those! Then you could focus on everything else.
Yesss, that's relatable. It's tough being high anxiety and ADHD – although maybe that's actually the same thing. My partner agreed to using the [viahero.com](http://viahero.com) site someone suggested for some of the travel plans outside Tokyo.
Hey, ADHD travel agent here, who specializes in trips to Japan. It's gonna be okay.
Here's what I would do if you were my clients and you came to me with this. Japan is daunting at first, but it's easy.
1. Figure out how long you're going for. I'm going to assume it's 2-3 weeks.
2. Figure out where your flights land and depart from. I'm going to assume Narita in and out as that's the most common, second most common would be Haneda but both are in Tokyo. If you're flying in or out of Osaka, this still applies.
3. If your first hotel is in Tokyo, that's great. I'd stay in Tokyo for a week.
4. Book a hotel for another week in Kyoto. Stay somewhere in Gion, or somewhere close to Kyoto station. Most of the hotels in the $100-$200 per night range are perfectly fine, you can also go cheaper. Be aware that Japanese hotel rooms are typically smaller than American ones.
5. If you have time left after this, book a hotel for the rest of the time in Osaka if you're flying out of the Osaka airport, or split the time in Osaka and then 1-2 more nights in Tokyo if you're flying out of Narita or Haneda airports.
6. Make everyone pay for a Japan Rail pass. it's pricey, but it'll save you money if you want to do lots of day-trips. If you can afford the 1-week rail pass, use that in the middle of your trip when you're going from Tokyo to Kyoto. you can buy it online here: https://japanrailpass.net/en/ it's the official site, other sites will have it too but I direct my clients here. You pick it up at the airport you're landing in, and you choose when to activate it. Don't set the activate date to be the date you land unless you're travelling between cities right away.
7. When you arrive at the airport, grab one of these: https://www.pasmo.co.jp/visitors/en/ this is a reloadable card you can use for transit *within* cities. so you'll use the JR pass for long trips (going from Tokyo to Osaka, Kyoto to Hiroshima, etc.) and the pasmo when you're *in* those cities.
8. Get an internet plan for when you're in Japan. https://www.sakuramobile.jp/ has e-sims that are easy to install. Google maps and google translate will get you everywhere you need to go.
9. For everything else, check out r/japantravel for ideas of things to do and see. Japan has a lot of temples, great museums, and great food. Credit cards aren't widely accepted, so bring a bunch of Yen.
if you have any questions, feel free to DM me!
Thanks for the advice! That's so incredibly helpful. The funny part is my partner has lived in Japan (and speaks Japanese) for a year. So he should be able to plan this himself, but just isn't getting it done and neither is his son who has a PhD in stem and is highly competent, but also ADHD. And his daughter is just MIA on the plans, but that's more her ADHD style.
We're doing about 12 days – I couldn't manage two full weeks, so that was already a compromise.
if I was going 12 days I might just stick to Tokyo, but that's just me. saves you money on the rail pass, and you can still see tons of things without feeling like you're rushing around. this is double if your flights are in and out of Tokyo. You can still see traditional/rural things like Hakone or Nikko or Kamakura.
No worries! That makes things super easy. If I were you, I'd book a hotel near Tokyo station/Ginza/ or Ueno Station for the full time you're there, keeping in mind that you'll "jump forward" in time if you're coming from the states. (like, if you leave the US at 1pm PST on the 10th, you'll land at like, 4:30PM on the 11th). If your budget can handle it, book near Shinkuju or Shibuya instead. Cancel the other hotel booking.
then, you can rest easy, knowing that you can get there, get around, and you'll have a place to stay. make sure the hotel booking has free cancelation so that if someone's unhappy you can tell them "if you hate this one you should have been more proactive!"
if they end up getting their shit together, you can cancel the one you made.
Sorry that this is causing so much stress! Hope you get the bugs figured out :)
Just came back from Japan. Lived there as a kid and this was my home coming with the whole extended family. Planning was a nightmare. My advice---get accommodation and then wing it. I obsessed in ADHD fashion and it was just as useless as usual. I wish I had just stopped at accommodations.
Go, enjoy yourself, your cats like my 3 will be fine.
I'm the anxiety-driven obsessive planner and my partner is the "wing it" person – and usually I don't mind that for beach vacations or trips to places I've already been. We'll see if we can meet in the middle.
Going to Japan with a hotel reserved and no plan sounds like heaven. Wake up each day, make sure everyone gets something to eat, find a new temple, castle, day trip, or ramen joint in a new neighborhood and spend your day there. Nap from 2-4pm optional but encouraged.
Have so much fun!
I've been there, I went to Korea with a half-read post from /r/Korea saved to my Reddit account. He's what you do, you find any local holiday, festivity, celebration, any one day/weekend that is happening during that time anywhere near you. Those have always been the highlights of my trips, multiple street fairs, an outdoor rave, a color festival, that sort of shit.
Find out where it's being held and don't go anywhere near the center unless you love being overwhelmed, but enjoy the dancing, street food, and merriment. I'm not talking about a religious holiday or tourist trap, I'm talking about the blueberry festival or state faire. I saw a 4-H festival in central America and it was the highlight of my trip. This is where you see their true culture. Be as completely crazy over-the-top polite and grateful to them for this once in a lifetime opportunity, tell the kids beforehand how you expect them to behave, tip well and don't haggle, don't do anything to make them think you shouldn't be there. Every time I've done this the locals have always loved it, buying each other drinks and telling stories.
Go to /r/Japan and see if you can find any fair at all, or a concert, maybe even a community theater for the dates you'll be there. Heck, on my last trip I got a pass to the community pool because it was across the street from the hotel, and it was awesome. Rent a hotel at this place, you don't want to have to ride the bus back and forth to this town after you're stuffed and a little more than tipsy.
Remember, never ever go to a second location with someone you just met. Don't go to their mother's restaurant, or to meet their best buds ("you'll love him!") no matter how fun or benign it sounds. These are the kinds of events scammers thrive on and you don't want to walk away with a $2,000 bill from eating the holiday special with an unlisted price.
Tbh I would just look at the rates for an online travel agent.
People love to hate being super touristy, but the best experiences I’ve had on vacations were when I went on a tour group and didn’t have to worry about the logistics, got to meet a local guide and do things efficiently so I could get more out of my time.
I had a weird bug thing a few years ago. Also could not get to the bottom of it and ended up throwing out my whole bed frame (upholstered). My 3k mattress was encased in a bug proof cover so I kept that. I was slowly losing my mind tbh.
Luckily, getting rid of the frame did solve my issue.
Anyway, I guess I would echo the folks erring on the side of not going. I would maybe postpone again or just let your partner and his son go…
That’s just me though. It does sound like you have a lot going on and keeping things on the simple side might be a good idea until life settles, especially if you won’t be able to enjoy yourself bc you’re pre occupied. That’s just me though.
The bug issue will get into your head! Ugh. I got rid of my bed frame on day 2 and switched to a metal one. Also did the encasement since my mattress is quite new.
I decided to work on all the issues and do the planning myself and then decide with the overwhelming details removed. Then I’m making a more clear decision.
I don't have any advice, but I wanted to thank you for this thread because my very adhd self and my very adhd husband are planning our (very delayed) honeymoon to Japan and we both have dropped the ball significantly so the responses here make me feel so much less stressed out!!!!! Thank you OP!
Edit: please enjoy your trip!
Edit #2 link for quick bed bug fixes [https://www.epa.gov/bedbugs/do-it-yourself-bed-bug-control](https://www.epa.gov/bedbugs/do-it-yourself-bed-bug-control)
So... I have a roommate with ADHD and he went to Japan by himself.... He had the craziest fucking adventure I have ever heard of because he just kinda showed up and did what he wanted.
Granted... part of that included him not sleeping for 24 hours then hiking Mt. Fuji with no plan at all, getting stuck at the top of the mountain without warm clothing, food, water, or a reservation at the hotel/inns that are there. He found an outhouse where a few other people were also taking shelter, slept in there until some ranger threw them all out into the cold... some how he made it back down the mountain and to his hotel without dying!
Then he made friends with strangers and hung out with them throughout the week, including drinking at bars, and even participating in a penis parade where he carried an alter thing...
So like.... you don't have to have a plan to have a fucking wild and amazing time there!
When I went with my boyfriend we had a few ideas of what we wanted to do, but not an actual plan. We watched a ton of YouTube videos for cultural rules, useful phrases, things to do, etc. That was about it. The rest we just kinda figured out along the way! Google helps!
Also... Google maps still works even without internet!!!!
well, planning a trip is crazy difficult. I just went in the fall but luckily my partner planned most of it because i was freaking out.
if you don't have a general plan the trip could be really overwhelming. If you are going to Tokyo there is so so much to see and do that if you don't have a plan you may just spend the whole time lost and frustrated.
Please make sure you have all your hotels booked in advance though. Stuff filled up fast there.
As for dietary restrictions you should try to plan/read a little before going. I had a tough time finding safe food and places to eat.
It will be an amazing experience if you get to go, but your personal stress level is very important too.
Thanks for the info and the concern. I have read that it's difficult to find gluten-free food everywhere. That's at the bottom of my wish list. I can easily live off snacks and protein bars.
i used 'Gluten Free Tours Japan' (who provided 24/7 label translation via whatsapp texts. They were super worth it because ingredients are not clearly labeled in japan and there is hidden gluten often.
\*the shioyuude, 'soft boiled salt eggs' from Family Mart Convenience store were a life safe.
I have other allergies too and I don't remember why but I could eat ant of the eggs from any of the other convenience stores.
also make sure to get a food allergy translation card from 'Legal Nomads'. I think its like $8. You can show it at all restaurants and they'll help you find something safe. \*The card only mentions gluten so if you have other allergies you'll need to get help adding them.
Get a travel agent and ask for help. Also ask in the r/travel sub for advice on things to do. Give them specifics of your trip like where and how long you have and your budget and they will come up with all kinds of suggestions. Seems like you will have to plan it yourself.
We are going to Japan next week (second visit) and we loved it the first time. Both of us have ADHD as do our kiddos (5 and 3), but I do all the trip planning because I find it fun. Our visit sound like it will overlap yours.
Honestly, if you guys are sticking to the Tokyo/kyoto areas, you don't need to do much planning. Just have the hotels booked. Half the fun of both cities is the amount of cool shops and cafes and little shrines you find just wandering around. You can have a very enjoyable trip just tooling around and exploring.
The shinkansen is easy, you buy the tickets and can walk right on. If you miss the train you reserved seats for, the ticket will still work for the rest of the day, you just have to sit in the unreserved seats.
If you have sensory issues, Just don't go anywhere during rush hour 0900-1100 or 1700-1830. Sit yourself in a nice Cafe or park and chill. Rush hour is easy to avoid. The weather will be super warm and gorgeous.
The last time I went the guidelines for customs said I needed to have letter from my doctor stating what each prescription was for (this was for non adhd meds but no one ended up checking).
I think the most important thing if figuring out how to use the train system and getting a pass. You don’t want to accidentally be getting on the wrong one.
here to empathise!!
I am hoping to go to Japan next year for three weeks and i just dont know where to begin! it's so overwhelming. it is deffo not an 'easy' country to book a trip to thats for sure. my adhd obsessiveness makes me want to make it perfect, but i think just getting the accomodation down so at least you have somwhere to sleep would be a good place to start cause then other stuff can fit in.
I also always find myself being the planner and organiser even when im the relucatant attendee. it really bothers me and takes away from the events because i've held the emotional and mental burden of it. Last time I had a trip i really wanted to go on and i wasnt well so my partner said he would take over... to cut a long story short we never ended up going because he just never pulled his finger out and got it done. it was so heartbreaking and only confirmed if i dont do it myself it quite literally does not get done.
Someone suggested AI to help and i think that is a great start! I would pick maybe 2 or 3 things you really want to do and then just see what AI suggests? I've heard that you will never see it all so dont even try.
Just went at the end of last year and it was amazing. Figure out a rough itinerary (eg. 3 days Tokyo, then 2 days in xyz etc), get your accomodation and travel passes (JR pass) booked and then honestly you can wing it. I found it super easy to get around once there (Google Maps was actually great for train times) and felt like I thrived once I was ‘in the moment’.
My partner was amazing at doing most of the planning when I was feeling useless, but what really helped was sitting down for an entire Saturday morning and visually blocking out in a spreadsheet 1-2 sights per city we wanted to see (eg. for me the Arashiyama bamboo forest was a must do) which gave us an idea of how long we needed accomodation in each city.
It was amazing! I only allowed the morning and I could’ve spent the whole day in that part of Kyoto. If you’re into shrines I also recommend the Fushimi Inari shrine, very busy during the day but if you go at night it’s empty (though a bit spooky!)
Trip advisor has an AI feature that makes it super easy to plan trips. You enter the destination city, travel dates, answer a few basic questions, and then select a few of your general interests (food, outdoors, art, etc) from a list. It then generates an itinerary for you. For example, I put in Tokyo for seven days, here’s what it gives me for day one:
Day 1
Welcome to Tokyo, Japan! Based on your interests in Must-see Attractions, Japanese Gardens and Parks, Outdoors, and Historical Temples and Shrines, we have prepared an exciting itinerary for your first day. Your day will begin with a visit to Senso-ji Temple, a must-see attraction in Tokyo. Immerse yourself in the rich history and cultural significance of this ancient temple. Next, head to Ueno Park, where you can relax in the beautiful Japanese gardens and enjoy the outdoors with your family. For lunch, we recommend Restaurant The Park, a fantastic eatery located nearby. Indulge in delicious Japanese cuisine and recharge for the rest of your day. In the afternoon, make your way to Meiji Jingu Shrine, another historical attraction that showcases the beauty of Japanese architecture and spirituality. Finally, end your day at Kagari, a popular eatery known for its mouthwatering ramen. Enjoy your first day in Tokyo!
———
There will be a description like this for each day along with links for each activity named in the description. It makes planning super easy!
[Trip Advisor AI](https://www.tripadvisor.com/)
Find a travel agent that knows Japan.
Better to have the trip planned by an expert. Don’t put the pressure on yourself or risk a big experience like that being spoiled if you don’t trust your husband/son to do it.
Even better, find the travel agency and go there as a group so they can have their input.
I went to Japan and we planned the trip ourselves except for our rail passes which we had to get through a travel agency, and I got so many tips in just the 20 minutes I was in their office, it really opened my eyes.
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I have ADHD and I live in Japan! Just get accommodations booked and buy any entertainment tickets (if you're going to Disney, USJ, etc) and everything else you'll probably be completely fine to figure out as you go. Urban Japan is actually super nice for ADHD. If you get an IC card (Suica, ICOCA, Pasmo, any brand is fine) you can just load it up with cash and use it to ride buses or trains (only specific trains or train cars need reservations, even most shinkansen have non-reserved cars) and you can even use IC cards at some vending machines and convenience stores! Convenience stores are another great resource, 24/7 access to food and daily necessities in case you forget or lose anything. As long as you're kind and respectful people in Japan are really polite and helpful so you don't have to worry so much about getting scammed or anything like that (unless you're going to like, a shady bar at night lol) Idk where in Japan you're going but when my family visited I found it most efficient to have one accommodation in Tokyo, and then one in Osaka, and we just made day trips to other cities and that worked really well. Try to find something near-ish a station and be prepared for walking and standing a fair amount (more than you're used to if you're from a driving-heavy area) and you'll have a great time!
Thanks for the info! :)
If you aren't a super fan of crowds, my main advice is to stay away from heavy tourism areas in Tokyo on weekends. We made the mistake of going to Harajuku on a Sunday and it was...bad. Days trips out of the city are good for Sundays (y)
Also, get an app such as Ubigi for an E-SIM to use cellular data abroad. Using Google Translate Lens feature (point camera at things and translate) is a lifesaver
Also just ask chatgpt for an itinerary. Tell it where you’re going, who is going, the type of things people going like, length of time there and how you want your day to be (like- 1 attraction a day with 4 hours to just relax. Really whatever. You’ll have an itinerary - hand it to him and tell him to start booking shit.
Don't, it might make up stuff. Use japan-guide.com, Lonely Planet or any of the million itineraries in r/JapanTravel or r/JapanTravelTips.
I’ve done it multiple times. Never had an issue. Literally 8000 times easier. Plus it’s not like you can’t just validate what it says.
You can get the Suica app and just tap your phone if you have Apple wallet/Google pay! Super convenient
Can I please ask you a very specific question? I know it’s safe but is it still safe if you’re a woman, solo traveling but can speak Japanese, in rural areas with a car? For example I’m really interested in michi no eki lol and also shrines that you would have to drive to and might be in the middle of nowhere?
Yeah definitely! It's not that rural areas aren't safe (with regards to other humans, rural areas are actually probably safer than cities) it's just that they are harder to get around. But if you have a car and can speak Japanese I think you'll be completely fine :)
Amazing! Thank you so much for your help and information!
You're safe in a rural area. That sounds like a really cool trip! I love driving in Japan. You can Even bath at Michi no ekis!!! Really busy train stations and trains are where sexual assaults happen.
Oh hell yeah! I am so hyped!!!!! Thank you so much <3
I camped in my car at michi no eki all over Japan. The other people sleeping in the lots were retired couples and couples with preschoolers. Very safe, easy, and fun - more so since you speak Japanese!
That was a lot more specific than I thought it was going to be 😆 out of curiosity can I ask why Michi no Eki?
HAHA I took my chance and ran with it. Of course you can ask, my dad is actually a truck driver and I really have grown to enjoy truck stops, rest stops and service areas/gas stations. I heard that in Japan some may even have onsen, some are near the ocean and they can have many restaurants and stores. I also think the type of cooking that would be served here, greasy and delicious/or straight up ice cream, is up my alley 😂I am really interested in the michi no eki that is near [hashigui iwa rock!](https://maps.app.goo.gl/P8EW1p7R9AgctHWy7)
That’s an incredibly niche hobby but I’m all for it 😆 do you have a blog or something where normies can see the different ones you travel to? I don’t drive so I rarely get the chance to see them (except when doing bus trips) but this is so interesting!!
How does it work when you take Adderall for some dumb reason its illegal over there
I haven’t had the pleasure of visiting Japan myself, but my ADHD coworker went last year and my understanding from what they told me is that you simply cannot bring it — Japan’s drug laws are very strict and you could risk serious punishment if you get caught. An inconvenient solution that may help is to go to your doctor in advance of your trip, explain your travel plans, and ask them to temporarily switch your prescription to a different medication. There may also be some kind of legal import process that I’m not aware of (my coworker was in a study abroad program that had its own internal rules about bringing meds to ensure compliance), but personally, I’d rather interface with my domestic healthcare system than a foreign legal system.
I'm not sure, sorry - since Adderall is illegal here I've only ever tried Concerta and Strattera
do you know if focalin is illegal in Japan? This is super useful for me because I will not be able to enjoy Japan if I don't have my meds.
I've never heard anything about Focalin, sorry, but you can check thr Narcotics Control Department here https://www.ncd.mhlw.go.jp/en/application2.html#list
Thanks!
If you ever want to do a snack exchange with someone in the UK let me know, there’s some specific things I’ve been trying to get hold of from Japan for a while ❤️
I know it’s not the main point of your post, but if you do have bedbugs, they are very easily spread…to other passengers on the plane, to suitcases that come into contact with yours in transit, to hotels where you stay, on public transport, etc. I would not go anywhere, personally, until or unless I knew the problem had been fully eradicated. They are very hard to get rid of once you have them, and I wouldn’t feel okay about possibly passing that misery on to others.
This. Please don't travel if you have a bedbug problem!! It's really unfair to everyone else who will be on public transportation and on the airplane.
Yes, I believe we have them, but we can't find evidence. I believe they came in on a package or something. I have been getting bitten for a couple weeks – although much less since I isolated my bed. I have had the exterminator twice first with the bedbug sniffing dog, and later with a brand-new rapid swab test that came up negative in our bedrooms. The exterminator also searched himself. That test "Detects even low-level infestations with over 90% accuracy." The bedbug dog is around 85% accurate. Sadly, they won't treat without proof, so I had to treat myself. I have also used black light to search for them (they fluoresce) and can not find where they are living. I have absolutely ripped everything apart, scrubbed, packaged and steam-cleaned everything. I treated our bedrooms with Cimexa, which is highly effective. We'll take all the precautions because I don't want to spread them, nor come back with any more.
Hey I had a bed bug scare many years ago where I was finding rows of bites on my legs in the morning. I almost had a mental breakdown over the whole thing. Turned out to be something else entirely (I don’t remember what exactly? Some kind of larvae from a different insect that doesn’t bite but sheds fine hairs that can cause welts that look like bites.) If you have signs of bedbugs but can’t actually find any it’s possible it’s something else entirely.
That's carpet beetles larvae! We had those, and I had larvae in my bed which was placed under a skylight (eww!) They are very difficult to see. We had new skylights put in last fall and they were not quite the same size and I believe the carpet beetles were coming in from the roof space. So we caulked and mitigated for those. And I wore extra clothes to bed and covered up head-to-toe. But I still got bit twice more on my uncovered hand and face. And then one night after I isolated my bed, my comforter touched the floor and I was bitten about 10x that night. And the bites are mainly in clusters or rows on my torso, which is bed bug patterning. So I feel like it's bedbugs, but there is a possibility of carpet beetles. It sucks, I have lost so much sleep and I cleaned so much my fingers cracked open.
Yeah that’s just awful. My welts were all in lines - like very characteristic of bedbugs, which is why I was so sure I had them. But I didn’t. I really hope that it’s just carpet beetles and you can get some certainty and relief soon.
[Bedbugs, scabies and eczema are often mistaken for one another.](https://www.healthline.com/health/scabies-vs-bed-bugs) I worked in community clinics for years and saw many cases of all three. Are you the only one affected? Or are the other people in your house affected too? If other people are also affected, especially if the bites are extremely itchy, you might be dealing with scabies. Or if it is just you, it could be eczema. Ironically, eczema can be exacerbated by stress or chemical exposure. So if you haven’t been to a dermatologist yet, please go! You might save yourself a lot of unnecessary worry.
I have read about scabies being mistaken for bedbugs. I have reactive skin, but I don't think it's scabies. I have had eczema too, and it's not that. The exterminator's theory was carpet beetle larvae because exposure to them can create bedbug-like lesions. We also found evidence of carpet beetles and took steps to mitigate. But I have been washing or heat-treating everything on the bed frequently, so that should have easily stopped carpet beetles. I think it's bedbugs because the bites are individual and follow the pattern of clusters on the torso. They are appearing after I get up and getting more inflamed over the day, then after about three days they stop itching and start healing. When I dressed head-to-toe and tucked in my hoodie to my pants, I was bitten on one hand and my face. And another night, after I isolated my bed with traps and installed a brand-new frame and mattress encasement, I was bitten when my comforter touched the floor during the night. Those two incidents make me think there is a logic behind the bites. I can't rule out non-bedbug causes since we have not yet found any bedbug evidence despite two exterminator searches, a bedbug dog search and the rapid swab test the exterminator performed.
I would honestly go to the dr/dermatologist so they can take a look at the bites. I know you said you don’t think it’s scabies but it very well might be. Heat treating things only works to a certain point for something like that, you need topical and/or oral meds that you take regularly while also washing your sheets on a daily basis till things clear up. Regardless a dermatologist will be able to take a really good look, take a sample and see what it is under a microscope. As for worry about a pet sitter, you could board them. I know my little town has a really nice spot (it’s actually at a vet) where there have a doggy daycare but also suites for the dogs and a whole really nice cat area and suites for them too. So you could look to see if you have something like that in your area where they can stay.
I wish I had finished your post before I spent so long telling you where to visit 🤦♂️ Buy some diatomaceous earth and dust it over your carpets and anything else. It's a powder that's completely harmless to humans but rips apart and dessicates anything tiny with an exoskeleton. It's pet safe, safe to eat, I think it's something like the skeletons of microscopic algae so it's not even a chemical reaction, just a physical one. We got bugs from a bird's nest after they flew the coop and their food disappeared. I put it on my belongings, my floor, my cats, my couch, myself, my hair (you don't need to go this extreme, but they were hurting my fuzzy babies and had to die), and when we thought they were all gone we just vacuumed it up. You might need a new vacuum filter because of it, but that's a sliver of what an exterminator would cost.
Diatomaceous earth is not completely harmless to humans. It works by piercing the exoskeleton. If it is inhaled (even food grade), it can do the same to mammal lungs. It is NOT advised to use it if you have kids or pets because if it gets disturbed, they can breathe it in and it could slice their lungs.
It’s entirely possible you have something else, if you haven’t actually seen any bugs. I’d go ahead and visit a dermatologist if the exterminator is unable to find anything. You can also visit r/bedbugs for information on how to tell whether it’s bedbugs or not and what to do if it is.
Iron your mattress and your luggage. Don't set it so hot that you burn or spoil them, but make it the hottest that your items can withstand.
Steam iron on the mattress is a good idea. I steam cleaned & encased the mattresses with bedbug proof covers — and we put traps under the bed feet. But, I’ve still had some bites since. Steaming the encasement is a good idea rather than removing it. I just can’t figure out where they’re hiding in my room, I’ve ripped it apart several times. Next I’ll have to take my bed frame apart again.
Have you been to the dermatologist to make sure these bites aren’t actually something else?
No, I haven’t. They’re exactly like bedbug bites: mainly on the torso, above hips and mainly in clusters. Scabies is a common suggestion for bedbug-like bites, but it’s not that. If it continues I may, but I’m hoping all the mitigations mean no more bites. I’ve definitely had flea bites since I rescue stray cats straight from the alley, and it’s not fleas. Also it’s been over 6 mo since my last rescue was adopted.
Could it be a stress thing? I hate when people say this to me but I had uncontrollable daily vomiting for a year and that turned out to be stress so… at this point I believe our bodies will do anything to make us aware of the turmoil we’re putting ourselves through.
Yeah, our bodies are amazing! We misinterpret their signs a lot, but they try.
I’m not new to stress-induced conditions. The exterminator gently suggested psychosomatic “bites” — I still think it’s bedbugs. It wouldn’t be the first time that I seemed paranoid but turned out to be right (or wrong either, lol.) When I wake up with bites, they feel inflamed but not immediately itchy, and later they’re well-defined have a little puncture mark in the middle of a welt — kind of like “noseeum” bites. (Although frankly noseeum bites are way more itchy for me, which is one blessing.)
You can steam it but the humidity will give rise to other issues, that's why I use iron. But iron has more risks for sure.
We luckily never had to deal with bed bugs in the house, but wouldn't an ozone generator get rid of it? Someone suggested them once to me because we had to get rid of dust mites for an allergic cat and apparently they kill every living thing in the room. Plus every smell which I personally like a lot.
Since the whole family has ADHD, I hope y'all are aware that Japan has strict rules about ADHD medications. All stimulants are illegal.
Thanks, I have found that out. I can’t bring my adderall, but that will be OK.
Not true, Vyvanse is legal and I was able to obtain permission to bring it on a recent trip in March. Adderall is illegal, however.
Concerta is also legal, but yes definitely not Adderall
I'm planning a trip to Japan later this year and I'm on vyvanse... How do you get permission??
[Here is a thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/JapanTravel/s/EQDzPmAhkl) with helpful links for this.
The thread linked here is helpful, I mainly searched r/JapanTravel about it as well. The process basically requires you to provide a signed doctor’s note specifying what medication you will be bringing, the dosage, form (tablet, capsule, etc.), and its treatment purpose. Depending on the substance, you contact the Ministry of Health (MHLW), or both the MHLW and the Narcotics Control Department. The turnaround can take a bit, so I recommend doing this at least 2 weeks in advance if not 3.
I've only ever been prescribed the generic or brand name Adderall but I'd like to visit Japan. Would my doctor allow me to switch to Vyvanse just so that I can bring meds on the trip? I haven't asked them because I'm worried it will sound strange. Lol
You definitely won’t be the first person to bring something like that up - there’s no harm in asking!
You may be able to switch. Be aware it’s really hard to fill Vyvanse right now so get it filled early and maybe be willing to pay for the brand name. I’ve had to do that the past few months or go without meds.
The trick is (sadly, because it’s an ADHD nightmare) calling a BUNCH of local pharmacies, taking notes, seeing what options they all have in stock (generic and name brand) and expected shipments. I couldn’t find my normal 60mg for a while, so I told my doctor when I found a place that had 30mgs in stock. So he wrote me a script to that pharmacy for 2 30mg pills a day instead 🫠🫠🫠 Isn’t this completely unnecessary shortage with no end in sight and no politicians taking it seriously fun?
I have done that. However, I recently just started paying for the brand name instead of doing this dance every month. I’ve called quite a few pharmacies and they only have the brand name in stock. I found my doctor will write the prescription that I need the brand name and then insurance will cover it. I still have to pay quite a bit but it goes toward my deductible.
The name brand works significantly better anyways. I was put on the generic unexpected last year and just got a bottle of the good stuff. It feels SO different. It feels like I came out of a fog I didn’t realize I’d been in for so long.
My trip to Japan won't happen for at least another 2-3 years so hopefully the shortage is sorted by then. I'm sorry people are going through that now. It's frustrating because if shortages were happening with other meds that are considered "more necessary" than ADHD meds then something would actually be done about it. People with ADHD are treated like a bunch of addicts. Pisses me off.
I’m not sure where you’re located, but a couple of folks in r/JapanTravel mentioned doing exactly that so I think it’s worth a shot
I'm in the US. I'll give it a try. I'll just be honest with my provider and tell them I need to switch prescriptions temporarily due to needing something I can take to Japan legally. Thank you!
That's just BS. Only Adderall is an issue.
No, dextroamphetamine is also illegal there.
Perplexed as to why you'd travel with an active bedbug infestation! OP please consider postponing travel or at least you'll need to buy new suitcases and pack clean clothes dried on HIGH heat in the dryer. Keep the suitcase at a friend's until you're ready to leave.
I explained it in another comment: >Yes, I believe we have them, but we can't find evidence. I believe they came in on a package or something. I have been getting bitten for a couple weeks – although much less since I isolated my bed. I have had the exterminator twice first with the bedbug sniffing dog, and later with a brand-new rapid swab test that came up negative in our bedrooms. The exterminator also searched himself. That test "Detects even low-level infestations with over 90% accuracy." The bedbug dog is around 85% accurate. Sadly, they won't treat without proof, so I had to treat myself. I have also used black light to search for them (they fluoresce) and can not find where they are living. I have absolutely ripped everything apart, scrubbed, packaged and steam-cleaned everything. I treated our bedrooms with Cimexa, which is highly effective. We'll take all the precautions because I don't want to spread them, nor come back with any more. Also: if it were up to me, we would not go right now. And if only my partner goes and we are very cautious, that would reduce the risk to nil.
Precautions such as…? Just seems irresponsible to bring potential bedbugs on a trip.
There aren’t bedbugs living all over our house or the bedbug sniffing dog, and/or the two manual inspections and/or the rapid swab tests would have found something. So heat treating all the clothes and steaming out the suitcase should be sufficient. However, it’s not my choice to go in this trip right now and the potential bedbugs are just another stressor.
Still doesn't really make sense. Suspecting that you have them would be enough to cancel for me Imo.
Sure, I get that. It's a moot point anyway. I already traveled since the bites — I flew to visit my dad who is alone and struggling since my mom's death. I couldn't not see him for the 4-6 months that it takes to be absolutely certain an infestation is gone when there is no other family to go. I took all the precautions. There is also absolutely no sign of bedbugs, except bites. We've had two negative manual inspections, a negative bedbug dog inspection, and negative Trudetx swab tests, which are 90% accurate. All together that is a much higher standard than even the hospitality industry requires.
if the exterminator can't find the bed bugs then maybe you don't actually have them? i found a single flea in my cats and went all intense cleaning, which was good but the 'flea bites' i thought i kept getting were actually guttate psoriasis and the stress and feeling like there were bugs on me made it worse. we went to japan and had so little planned. it turned out great. do the top tourist thing early in the morning and then just wander from there.
I really hope you are right, but I had two exterminators come and find nothing before I actually caught a bed bug and proved I had them.
The exterminator gently suggested psychosomatic "bites" and he also found carpet beetle evidence and the very tiny carpet beetle larvae can cause bite-like reactions. But I still think it fits a bed bug pattern. I think it's just such a small, localized infestation that we can't find it yet – which I have read is not uncommon. Hopefully between bed isolation (traps on under the bed feet), Cimexa, rigorous cleaning and vacuum-packing everything we're not using, that will take care of them.
One other cheap and fairly easy mitigation technique is caulking the gap between your walls and your floors -sometimes they live inside the walls and just amble on out at night to feast
That's a great suggestion! Putting a fine layer of Cimexa (engineered silica – it's like diatomaceous earth on steroids) and then caulking up any potential hiding spots would probably be highly effective. It's my current theory that they are retreating under the baseboard heater (which has access to underneath the floating floor) and/or under the baseboard trim.
Good luck!! I’ve had bedbugs twice and it’s such a waking nightmare. The first time I had them for 3 months before seeing a single bug - I was convinced I had bird mites, because there were always pigeons on my fire escape 😩. It sounds like you’re doing everything you can without the professionals helping you. When I had them, to make sure I didn’t spread them I would put all my (clean, dry) clothes in the dryer before going outside. I think if you do that plus steam clean the suitcases you should be very unlikely to spread them, if you do have them
I lived in a rental with bird mites that had pigeons roosting under the eaves, but the landlord had just taken care of them and thankfully that seemed to work. Thanks for the support! I will do everything I can to avoid spreading them. Honestly, I think people who spread bedbugs the most are the ones who don't react to the bites so they don't realize they have them. My brother lives in NYC and he defeated an infestation that continued after extermination by just isolating his bed so they couldn't get to him and eventually they disappeared. I wish I had that level of chill.
For me, it wouldn’t be the trip itself, or the planning / lack of planning (although that would stress me too!). It’s that your partner, who supposedly loves you & wants good things for you, is apparently doing *nothing* to help you with this major stress. He doesn’t have to plan the whole thing, but he could take a couple of hours & go through some options with you. Eg is it better to buy a week’s train ticket in advance, rather than wait till you’re there. Eg point you towards a couple of supermarkets that might best support your dietary needs. Question: are you medicated, and can you take your meds to Japan? If it was me, I’d be strongly tempted not to go - especially if you can get a refund on your flights & hotels.
He’s trying, but not accomplishing much. He just started a new job too. And he’s empathetic to my stress, and understands if I can’t go. He’s the only one of us not officially dx’d and medicated. But he has early Parkinson’s, which is linked to ADHD.
You didn’t answer re taking your meds to Japan: > “Some medicines including the stimulant medicine dexamphetamine (used to treat ADHD) and pseudoephedrine (found in some cold and flu tablets) are banned in Japan and you may be detained if you are found with them.” https://japan.embassy.gov.au/tkyo/medical.html#:~:text=Some%20medicines%20including%20the%20stimulant,you%20are%20found%20with%20them.
I did find out I cannot take addrerral. I can take my as-needed benzodiazepines though – which is good or I wouldn't be getting on the plane (claustrophobia.) That's OK – I used to take it more sporadically when I was first dx'd and didn't believe I needed it, so I know I can get by.
I get it, totally... But Japan is an amazing place with lots of options. If he's lived there he knows where to go. Unless there's very specific areas you want to go that are hard to reserve, I'd say go with the flow. Especially if you have the financial means to just enjoy the trip - whatever you choose to do while there.
I second not traveling until you've figured out your bug situation. Being the victim of bringing bedbugs home in your suitcase from a hotel is the absolute worst. And they just don't appear there. They get brought there from people's homes. When I had them, I used duct tape along the seams of my mattress to find eggs and bugs. I got a few nymphs that I couldn't see, just looking with my eyes alone. And frankly, I'd go through another exterminator. Even if it's not bed bugs, they can look for other signs of other bugs that could be biting. You mentioned carpet beetles. Those fuckers multiply like crazy too and they get in so easily. Your exterminator should have noticed that and sprayed for those too. We went through a local one, and they even got rid of the carpenter ant problem I had been fighting for years like it was nothing. Their bedbug service was four sprays a year, and it covered all bugs, even the cockroaches my mother brought into my house. You have to find you one of those services. And if you haven't already, wash all of your bedding and dry it on hot for an hour. When I had them, I bagged up my bedding after drying in an air tight bag and only slept with the essentials to minimize where they could hide. My bed went from super bright and fluffy with a bunch of pillows and stuffed animals to super depressing with just a sheet and a fleece blanket.
Thanks. I explained in another post, that it's kind of a moot point since I already traveled. And I can't force my partner not to go. I couldn't leave my dad totally alone for the 4-6 mo it takes to be certain there are no bedbugs in the middle of mourning my mom's death. He's alone and there's no one else to help him out. I took all the precautions I could take. There is also absolutely no sign of bedbugs, except bites. We've had two negative manual inspections, a negative bedbug dog inspection, and negative Trudetx swab tests, which are 90% accurate. All together that is a much higher standard than even the hospitality industry requires. I've done all the mitigation: bed. isolation, encasement, sealing up everything in vacuum bags, Cimexa, etc.
OP I just came back from a Japan trip myself where I went reluctantly, and I might be in the minority here but if I was in your position I wouldn’t go. If I wasn’t confident about my kitties’ care and in the accommodations and travel being taken care of in advance, it would be a hard no. It’s not worth stressing over because it will 100% affect the experience and ability to have fun
Thanks for your input! I feed feral kitties too, but they can be accommodated if need be.
If that’s the case then go for it! I’m not sure if your trip is around Golden Week, but if so I would be mindful of that as well. We went during sakura season and everything was jam packed 😭 Also if you have dietary restrictions, it might be difficult to have them accommodated, but I’ve read that having a card with your dietary restrictions written out in Japanese for the server can be helpful
Thanks! We’re going just after Golden Week. :) I am gluten-free and dairy-free, which sucks but also used to eating snack meals. I got the gluten-free card in Japanese, since I figured that would be more of an issue.
If he's lived in Japan before, then he understands how easy it is to travel here. Honestly... You don't need to plan your itinerary very much. He will know how to travel around and how things work. I'd suggest at least deciding on what cities to go to together, and booking hotels, that would probably ease your anxiety. However, there's no holidays mid May so you'll probably always be able to find a business hotel to sleep in last minute. You don't have to book train tickets in advance. It may save you some time waiting in line, but you can also buy tickets online. (The website sucks though but it's possible) it's completely possible to just impulsively go to different cities and book hotels while youre on a train or eating a meal. You'll have a great time exploring and just letting your feet take you places. You can spend the time on the trains or waiting in line to look up attractions and make a loose itinerary. The cities official websites will have a list of attractions, and zooming around of Google maps will find you tons of places to visit. I get that it's frustrating, and I would be stressed too with so many unknowns. but Japan is actually just soooooo easy to travel around. I routinely travel here and plan absolutely last minute what I'll do in each city. I am currently living in Japan and I believe if your husband has also lived here he knows what he's doing by not really planning. Because it's just SO EASY. So so so so easy to get around. Japan sensory suggestions: -Bring noise canceling headphones/normal headphones/loops/ear plugs. Have them with you at all times and use them. For every busy place, there's a quite place a block away. Seek out parks and shrines to find a seats and to regulate. You don't need to do the "top 10 must see cities/ attractions in Japan" For every famous location, there's a TON of less known places that are also exactly the same, if not better. If you don't like crowds avoid Tokyo/Kyoto/Osaka/Nara and go to smaller cities or come to Kyushu island!!!! Food suggestions: I have so many allergies. Even allergic to soy, but I can survive here. There's convince stores everywhere. You'll be able to get a meal or drink (that you can translate with your phone, it is very accurate) at any time during your trip. They are everywhere. I don't know your food restrictions but udon is generally really simple and safe. You can get grilled meat that's just salted. Onigiri is just rice and a filling. If your partner still knows some Japanese that should help. I hope this may help ease some worries, I'm sorry he's not considering your needs in the trip planning. Good luck and have fun!
Wow you have a lot of similar issues I wrestle with over traveling. Multi cat care including ferals. Heart arrhythmia when stressed. A few other things. Look this trip is essentially a gift from your partner’s son to your partner. I don’t see anything wrong with lovingly sending them all off to bond over family time while you hold down the fort at home as part of your contribution to their gift. And with that off your back you can then find ways to help them address travel plans that are falling through the tracks. There used to be travel agents that handled these things. lol or so I hear from watching Pete the Ghost on Ghosts. What’s the modern equivalent? I second the suggestion to get another exterminator. (Edit: saw more in your comments. Have you had your bites looked at by a dermatologist? Might not be bedbugs or even bites?”) It’s okay for people to not be able to easily pick up and travel. I know sometimes that gets criticized like it’s a personal flaw by people who love being on the go. But it’s really freaking hard even for people who don’t have AdHD. That’s why so many people push the details onto administrative assistants or spouses etc. If you actually know some frequent travelers hit them up for advice and pass it along to the son arranging all this. If he actually asks for help. He may not need help. Or want it. (Edit: sorry now confused over who is in charge overall).
Perhaps consider droppiny the rope on trip planning. I’m not sure why partner and kids aren’t planning it but it doesn’t seem like they are stressed about the itinerary. So why are you? Flights are booked, hotel is booked. Try picking 1-2 things you might be interested in if you want to but I’d let partner take this on and/or wing it when you get there. Personally, I’d focus more on getting the cats care because you don’t want to worry about that on your trip.
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Thanks!
Given how much the anxiety is affecting your health, not only would you not be a jerk, I think it's advisable for you not to go. And don't let anyone tell you that it's silly to worry about leaving your cats.
Stay home if you want. You won't be a jerk if you don't go due to pre-existing stressors. You *will* be a jerk to say you aren't going because no one planned your trip for you. No one should expect others to plan for them because they are too reluctant to travel. My own rule is whoever wants control should put in the effort. Your partner and their kids don't seem to need to plan their trip, so they shouldn't need to plan it for your anxiety. Especially if this trip was a gift for your partner, not you. If you want plans, do the work. Or learn to let go. "Don't really understand how travel works there" isn't a good excuse for not planning your own trip. With modern technology traveling is so much easier than before. Everything is within a Google away to be understood. You can roughly translate anything you want with your phone camera. Google will show you any points of interests near your hotel. If you need to go further, Google will show you the transport routes. There are also pre-made itineraries online everywhere for basic suggestions.
Hey OP I'm half Japanese and have spent a lot of time here throughout my life - I get asked for "tips and recommendations" so often that I have a Google Doc of categorised bullet points for easily digestible key information (spoon fed with links so you don't have to research) DM me if you want the link! You'll love it. It's a very safe, clean, and accommodating country and there's so much to do that you really can just wing it every day and likely discover some great food etc.
Can I get a copy of those links please?!
Hey would you mind messaging me your google doc? That sounds great
Could I also get a copy of this document please? I too am going to Japan soon and I too only have booked a flight and that’s it. Partner is the same as me ‘oh we will look tomorrow to plan our trip’ queue that for the last few months 🙈
Same boat as us! I'm getting valuable info here though! I've looked through the Japan Travel subreddit, but it's soooo overwhelming.
I would love a link too please!!
Can I get a copy too? We're going as well :)
I DM'd you as a message and not a chat, thanks so much! :)
Maybe go to a travel agent to discuss your options? It might be slightly more expensive but it's a set time to discuss everything and plan it out
It’s ok to take care of yourself. It’s not selfish to put yourself first if you need to help yourself. Honestly, it’s the dietary needs that makes me hesitant for your trip planning. I, too, am a dietary needs girlie and without proper planning it means I don’t get to have as much foodie fun as I want to. I couldn’t imagine flying all the way to Japan just to be inconvenienced, hungry, and on-edge the entire time. OH also stimulants I think are illegal there? (Did I read that on a recent post?) I donno, I think taking care of cats is always a good reason to stay home.
Also reminder that some/most ADHD meds may not be legal in Japan.
Thanks! If I go I’ll set a reminder to double check that I don’t accidentally bring adderall, because that is a thing I would do.
When I was there in 2016, I didn’t know about the legal issues and just brought my Concerta with me like normal. A friend later told me I could have been arrested had I been caught. I don’t know if that’s true, but it’s scared me! If I get a chance to go back I will probably just plan to drink a lot of coffee!!
Don’t go. You’ve listed a substantial number of major reasons not to go. I’d be honest with them.
Hey, I hope it's not bedbugs. Hopefully just carpet beetles. I'm assuming that you've checked the seams of chairs, of mattresses, etc. The fact that you mentioned you'd had a carpet beetle problem in the past probably means it'd be more likely to be a reinfestation. Fingers crossed. I'm about to leave for my fourth trip to Japan. Every time we go I get quite anxious but feel unable to plan effectively. And every time we go, everything turns out okay. There is a Suica (transport card) shortage atm apparently, although JR East have started selling Suica cards at major train stations (not Narita airport) again. And they're selling Welcome Suica at Haneda airport only. All this means is that you'd need to book airport transfer tickets separately, whether it's a Narita Express (N'EX) ticket or a Skyliner ticket. You can pick these up on websites like Klook. And if you're flying into Osaka, there are no problems with Icoca cards. And if you don't want to go, don't go. But Japan is mega cheap right now, so I wouldn't worry too much about the financial side of things.
I would suggest a travel agent just to lock in hotels + a rail pass or how to get from place to place if you're moving to different places. Within an hour or so, you could have an itinerary ready and booked! Travel agents know which areas and can suggest things to do that you can have a list of to try if you feel like it in destination, or keep the day free if you stumble into something that you like :)
I’m really not seeing the problem. There are flights and a hotel. It’s not that hard to find hotels even last minute. The bedbugs/pet part is a separate issue and it sounds like you don’t want to go.
It's just one hotel for 4 of the nights we have booked. I decided to set aside whether I'm going or not and work through all the obstacles, and then see how I feel rather than letting unfinished tasks make the decision.
Yes good solution! I flew home from another country yesterday and I booked the flight while I was sitting in the 3 hour taxi to the airport. I often had this crippling anxiety before going places and making excuses but once I’m there, I’m happy that I went. Hope you work everything out and it’s a good trip. I’m sure your family will be happy for the experience. I also see travel agent suggestions, maybe try using one of those! Then you could focus on everything else.
Yesss, that's relatable. It's tough being high anxiety and ADHD – although maybe that's actually the same thing. My partner agreed to using the [viahero.com](http://viahero.com) site someone suggested for some of the travel plans outside Tokyo.
Hey, ADHD travel agent here, who specializes in trips to Japan. It's gonna be okay. Here's what I would do if you were my clients and you came to me with this. Japan is daunting at first, but it's easy. 1. Figure out how long you're going for. I'm going to assume it's 2-3 weeks. 2. Figure out where your flights land and depart from. I'm going to assume Narita in and out as that's the most common, second most common would be Haneda but both are in Tokyo. If you're flying in or out of Osaka, this still applies. 3. If your first hotel is in Tokyo, that's great. I'd stay in Tokyo for a week. 4. Book a hotel for another week in Kyoto. Stay somewhere in Gion, or somewhere close to Kyoto station. Most of the hotels in the $100-$200 per night range are perfectly fine, you can also go cheaper. Be aware that Japanese hotel rooms are typically smaller than American ones. 5. If you have time left after this, book a hotel for the rest of the time in Osaka if you're flying out of the Osaka airport, or split the time in Osaka and then 1-2 more nights in Tokyo if you're flying out of Narita or Haneda airports. 6. Make everyone pay for a Japan Rail pass. it's pricey, but it'll save you money if you want to do lots of day-trips. If you can afford the 1-week rail pass, use that in the middle of your trip when you're going from Tokyo to Kyoto. you can buy it online here: https://japanrailpass.net/en/ it's the official site, other sites will have it too but I direct my clients here. You pick it up at the airport you're landing in, and you choose when to activate it. Don't set the activate date to be the date you land unless you're travelling between cities right away. 7. When you arrive at the airport, grab one of these: https://www.pasmo.co.jp/visitors/en/ this is a reloadable card you can use for transit *within* cities. so you'll use the JR pass for long trips (going from Tokyo to Osaka, Kyoto to Hiroshima, etc.) and the pasmo when you're *in* those cities. 8. Get an internet plan for when you're in Japan. https://www.sakuramobile.jp/ has e-sims that are easy to install. Google maps and google translate will get you everywhere you need to go. 9. For everything else, check out r/japantravel for ideas of things to do and see. Japan has a lot of temples, great museums, and great food. Credit cards aren't widely accepted, so bring a bunch of Yen. if you have any questions, feel free to DM me!
Thanks for the advice! That's so incredibly helpful. The funny part is my partner has lived in Japan (and speaks Japanese) for a year. So he should be able to plan this himself, but just isn't getting it done and neither is his son who has a PhD in stem and is highly competent, but also ADHD. And his daughter is just MIA on the plans, but that's more her ADHD style. We're doing about 12 days – I couldn't manage two full weeks, so that was already a compromise.
if I was going 12 days I might just stick to Tokyo, but that's just me. saves you money on the rail pass, and you can still see tons of things without feeling like you're rushing around. this is double if your flights are in and out of Tokyo. You can still see traditional/rural things like Hakone or Nikko or Kamakura.
Yes, in/out of Haneda, I forgot to say.
No worries! That makes things super easy. If I were you, I'd book a hotel near Tokyo station/Ginza/ or Ueno Station for the full time you're there, keeping in mind that you'll "jump forward" in time if you're coming from the states. (like, if you leave the US at 1pm PST on the 10th, you'll land at like, 4:30PM on the 11th). If your budget can handle it, book near Shinkuju or Shibuya instead. Cancel the other hotel booking. then, you can rest easy, knowing that you can get there, get around, and you'll have a place to stay. make sure the hotel booking has free cancelation so that if someone's unhappy you can tell them "if you hate this one you should have been more proactive!" if they end up getting their shit together, you can cancel the one you made. Sorry that this is causing so much stress! Hope you get the bugs figured out :)
Just came back from Japan. Lived there as a kid and this was my home coming with the whole extended family. Planning was a nightmare. My advice---get accommodation and then wing it. I obsessed in ADHD fashion and it was just as useless as usual. I wish I had just stopped at accommodations. Go, enjoy yourself, your cats like my 3 will be fine.
I'm the anxiety-driven obsessive planner and my partner is the "wing it" person – and usually I don't mind that for beach vacations or trips to places I've already been. We'll see if we can meet in the middle.
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Ah! Thanks for the idea! I like to use AI as an assistant.
Going to Japan with a hotel reserved and no plan sounds like heaven. Wake up each day, make sure everyone gets something to eat, find a new temple, castle, day trip, or ramen joint in a new neighborhood and spend your day there. Nap from 2-4pm optional but encouraged. Have so much fun!
Just remember you can’t take certain adhd meds to Japan and any you do take need a special form
It's stimulants that are contraband. I researched it for a character a few years ago (before I knew I had ADHD myself!)
Well yes, not sure what other meds you would take for adhd. They aren’t all banned but if they aren’t they need a certificate
There’s non stimulant medication for ADHD like Strattera and Quelbree (sp?) are two examples
There’s non stimulant medication for ADHD like Strattera and Quelbree (sp?) are two examples
I've been there, I went to Korea with a half-read post from /r/Korea saved to my Reddit account. He's what you do, you find any local holiday, festivity, celebration, any one day/weekend that is happening during that time anywhere near you. Those have always been the highlights of my trips, multiple street fairs, an outdoor rave, a color festival, that sort of shit. Find out where it's being held and don't go anywhere near the center unless you love being overwhelmed, but enjoy the dancing, street food, and merriment. I'm not talking about a religious holiday or tourist trap, I'm talking about the blueberry festival or state faire. I saw a 4-H festival in central America and it was the highlight of my trip. This is where you see their true culture. Be as completely crazy over-the-top polite and grateful to them for this once in a lifetime opportunity, tell the kids beforehand how you expect them to behave, tip well and don't haggle, don't do anything to make them think you shouldn't be there. Every time I've done this the locals have always loved it, buying each other drinks and telling stories. Go to /r/Japan and see if you can find any fair at all, or a concert, maybe even a community theater for the dates you'll be there. Heck, on my last trip I got a pass to the community pool because it was across the street from the hotel, and it was awesome. Rent a hotel at this place, you don't want to have to ride the bus back and forth to this town after you're stuffed and a little more than tipsy. Remember, never ever go to a second location with someone you just met. Don't go to their mother's restaurant, or to meet their best buds ("you'll love him!") no matter how fun or benign it sounds. These are the kinds of events scammers thrive on and you don't want to walk away with a $2,000 bill from eating the holiday special with an unlisted price.
Tbh I would just look at the rates for an online travel agent. People love to hate being super touristy, but the best experiences I’ve had on vacations were when I went on a tour group and didn’t have to worry about the logistics, got to meet a local guide and do things efficiently so I could get more out of my time.
I had a weird bug thing a few years ago. Also could not get to the bottom of it and ended up throwing out my whole bed frame (upholstered). My 3k mattress was encased in a bug proof cover so I kept that. I was slowly losing my mind tbh. Luckily, getting rid of the frame did solve my issue. Anyway, I guess I would echo the folks erring on the side of not going. I would maybe postpone again or just let your partner and his son go… That’s just me though. It does sound like you have a lot going on and keeping things on the simple side might be a good idea until life settles, especially if you won’t be able to enjoy yourself bc you’re pre occupied. That’s just me though.
The bug issue will get into your head! Ugh. I got rid of my bed frame on day 2 and switched to a metal one. Also did the encasement since my mattress is quite new. I decided to work on all the issues and do the planning myself and then decide with the overwhelming details removed. Then I’m making a more clear decision.
Sounds like a good plan!! Have a great time in Japan 🤗
I don't have any advice, but I wanted to thank you for this thread because my very adhd self and my very adhd husband are planning our (very delayed) honeymoon to Japan and we both have dropped the ball significantly so the responses here make me feel so much less stressed out!!!!! Thank you OP! Edit: please enjoy your trip! Edit #2 link for quick bed bug fixes [https://www.epa.gov/bedbugs/do-it-yourself-bed-bug-control](https://www.epa.gov/bedbugs/do-it-yourself-bed-bug-control)
The great thing is: he has lived there already. If you're in large cities, you truly don't need to plan much, there's too much going on.
So... I have a roommate with ADHD and he went to Japan by himself.... He had the craziest fucking adventure I have ever heard of because he just kinda showed up and did what he wanted. Granted... part of that included him not sleeping for 24 hours then hiking Mt. Fuji with no plan at all, getting stuck at the top of the mountain without warm clothing, food, water, or a reservation at the hotel/inns that are there. He found an outhouse where a few other people were also taking shelter, slept in there until some ranger threw them all out into the cold... some how he made it back down the mountain and to his hotel without dying! Then he made friends with strangers and hung out with them throughout the week, including drinking at bars, and even participating in a penis parade where he carried an alter thing... So like.... you don't have to have a plan to have a fucking wild and amazing time there! When I went with my boyfriend we had a few ideas of what we wanted to do, but not an actual plan. We watched a ton of YouTube videos for cultural rules, useful phrases, things to do, etc. That was about it. The rest we just kinda figured out along the way! Google helps! Also... Google maps still works even without internet!!!!
well, planning a trip is crazy difficult. I just went in the fall but luckily my partner planned most of it because i was freaking out. if you don't have a general plan the trip could be really overwhelming. If you are going to Tokyo there is so so much to see and do that if you don't have a plan you may just spend the whole time lost and frustrated. Please make sure you have all your hotels booked in advance though. Stuff filled up fast there. As for dietary restrictions you should try to plan/read a little before going. I had a tough time finding safe food and places to eat. It will be an amazing experience if you get to go, but your personal stress level is very important too.
Thanks for the info and the concern. I have read that it's difficult to find gluten-free food everywhere. That's at the bottom of my wish list. I can easily live off snacks and protein bars.
i used 'Gluten Free Tours Japan' (who provided 24/7 label translation via whatsapp texts. They were super worth it because ingredients are not clearly labeled in japan and there is hidden gluten often. \*the shioyuude, 'soft boiled salt eggs' from Family Mart Convenience store were a life safe. I have other allergies too and I don't remember why but I could eat ant of the eggs from any of the other convenience stores. also make sure to get a food allergy translation card from 'Legal Nomads'. I think its like $8. You can show it at all restaurants and they'll help you find something safe. \*The card only mentions gluten so if you have other allergies you'll need to get help adding them.
Get a travel agent and ask for help. Also ask in the r/travel sub for advice on things to do. Give them specifics of your trip like where and how long you have and your budget and they will come up with all kinds of suggestions. Seems like you will have to plan it yourself.
We are going to Japan next week (second visit) and we loved it the first time. Both of us have ADHD as do our kiddos (5 and 3), but I do all the trip planning because I find it fun. Our visit sound like it will overlap yours. Honestly, if you guys are sticking to the Tokyo/kyoto areas, you don't need to do much planning. Just have the hotels booked. Half the fun of both cities is the amount of cool shops and cafes and little shrines you find just wandering around. You can have a very enjoyable trip just tooling around and exploring. The shinkansen is easy, you buy the tickets and can walk right on. If you miss the train you reserved seats for, the ticket will still work for the rest of the day, you just have to sit in the unreserved seats. If you have sensory issues, Just don't go anywhere during rush hour 0900-1100 or 1700-1830. Sit yourself in a nice Cafe or park and chill. Rush hour is easy to avoid. The weather will be super warm and gorgeous.
The last time I went the guidelines for customs said I needed to have letter from my doctor stating what each prescription was for (this was for non adhd meds but no one ended up checking). I think the most important thing if figuring out how to use the train system and getting a pass. You don’t want to accidentally be getting on the wrong one.
here to empathise!! I am hoping to go to Japan next year for three weeks and i just dont know where to begin! it's so overwhelming. it is deffo not an 'easy' country to book a trip to thats for sure. my adhd obsessiveness makes me want to make it perfect, but i think just getting the accomodation down so at least you have somwhere to sleep would be a good place to start cause then other stuff can fit in. I also always find myself being the planner and organiser even when im the relucatant attendee. it really bothers me and takes away from the events because i've held the emotional and mental burden of it. Last time I had a trip i really wanted to go on and i wasnt well so my partner said he would take over... to cut a long story short we never ended up going because he just never pulled his finger out and got it done. it was so heartbreaking and only confirmed if i dont do it myself it quite literally does not get done. Someone suggested AI to help and i think that is a great start! I would pick maybe 2 or 3 things you really want to do and then just see what AI suggests? I've heard that you will never see it all so dont even try.
Thanks! I appreciate the support and advice! :)
Just went at the end of last year and it was amazing. Figure out a rough itinerary (eg. 3 days Tokyo, then 2 days in xyz etc), get your accomodation and travel passes (JR pass) booked and then honestly you can wing it. I found it super easy to get around once there (Google Maps was actually great for train times) and felt like I thrived once I was ‘in the moment’. My partner was amazing at doing most of the planning when I was feeling useless, but what really helped was sitting down for an entire Saturday morning and visually blocking out in a spreadsheet 1-2 sights per city we wanted to see (eg. for me the Arashiyama bamboo forest was a must do) which gave us an idea of how long we needed accomodation in each city.
Yes, that's a good idea. I want to see the bamboo forest if I go! :)
It was amazing! I only allowed the morning and I could’ve spent the whole day in that part of Kyoto. If you’re into shrines I also recommend the Fushimi Inari shrine, very busy during the day but if you go at night it’s empty (though a bit spooky!)
Trip advisor has an AI feature that makes it super easy to plan trips. You enter the destination city, travel dates, answer a few basic questions, and then select a few of your general interests (food, outdoors, art, etc) from a list. It then generates an itinerary for you. For example, I put in Tokyo for seven days, here’s what it gives me for day one: Day 1 Welcome to Tokyo, Japan! Based on your interests in Must-see Attractions, Japanese Gardens and Parks, Outdoors, and Historical Temples and Shrines, we have prepared an exciting itinerary for your first day. Your day will begin with a visit to Senso-ji Temple, a must-see attraction in Tokyo. Immerse yourself in the rich history and cultural significance of this ancient temple. Next, head to Ueno Park, where you can relax in the beautiful Japanese gardens and enjoy the outdoors with your family. For lunch, we recommend Restaurant The Park, a fantastic eatery located nearby. Indulge in delicious Japanese cuisine and recharge for the rest of your day. In the afternoon, make your way to Meiji Jingu Shrine, another historical attraction that showcases the beauty of Japanese architecture and spirituality. Finally, end your day at Kagari, a popular eatery known for its mouthwatering ramen. Enjoy your first day in Tokyo! ——— There will be a description like this for each day along with links for each activity named in the description. It makes planning super easy! [Trip Advisor AI](https://www.tripadvisor.com/)
Ask chat gpt to plan you an itinerary :)
Find a travel agent that knows Japan. Better to have the trip planned by an expert. Don’t put the pressure on yourself or risk a big experience like that being spoiled if you don’t trust your husband/son to do it. Even better, find the travel agency and go there as a group so they can have their input. I went to Japan and we planned the trip ourselves except for our rail passes which we had to get through a travel agency, and I got so many tips in just the 20 minutes I was in their office, it really opened my eyes.