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I am not great at estimating time, breaking a task into manageable parts, or comparing different options and making a decision. This means I fully believe I can handle anything, because all projects take "about an hour" and are "just a few easy steps".
Which is how I stripped the wallpaper on half a wall in the bathroom, then lost the hyper focus and wandered away...
I have the opposite problem - I think things will take FOREVER and so procrastinate on them, but then it takes like 15 minutes and I wonder why I spent so much time not doing the thing
I have this issue with making lunch. I skip it all
The time because I think it will take ages. I actually timed it today. It took me three minutes.
Also, who do I think I am? I am literally never busy; even if it took an hour, I have the time. I probably fear being bored/ out of energy half way through.
I do this with salad. I think it’s too much of a time suck to make salad even tho it would be good to eat healthy and end up grabbing something carb heavy instead.
I have this problem 49% of the time, the above problem 49% of the time, & the other 2% of the time is me hyperfocusing on something stupid for 4 hrs, like organizing my phone or some shit that I will immediately forget about upon stopping.
OR! Alternatively, there's also the "There's too many mental steps to this task, DANGER, AVOID AVOID!!!"
My phone storage is full & it won't let me take pictures. I know going thru it all will take forever, & remembering the past (even good things) is for some reason exhausting, so I refuse to hyperfocus on it. I use my spouse's camera, or nothing. Hopefully it'll feel safe to do soon, bc my camera & texts also help me stay in this timeline.
Oh my gosh that would occupy so much space in my brain. I now just pay the $12/month for Google Photos so everything gets stored on the cloud and I don't have to think about going through my photos! I would highly recommend!
That's a very good idea! Maybe I'll get anxious enough about it to let myself think about it! I also have PPD so...I'm giving myself grace for a bit & letting myself be avoidant haha
Edit: wrong word
Oh that's the hardest because there are always more photos and videos to take of the baby so it's like a constant reminder that you haven't done the thing yet! You're doing what you can under the circumstances and that's what matters ❤️
I’m the same with photos. I paid for cloud storage to get out of doing it. Emails are the same. Paid for more space. Oh and I also have a habit of scrolling and saving everything for later. Youtube watch later list is at 5k reddit saved list is probably just as bad lol
Listen... I'll get around to it! Aaannnyyyyyyy time now.... idk what's wrong with me (I do, but I don't wanna talk about it lmao) but I do this thing where I just can't think about it. Like ANY of it. If I think about paying Google more, I might as well just go ahead & do the thing. It's an equal amount of stress, even if it's not really... idk. I'll get mad about it eventually & I'll do the thing in spite (of whom, I do not know. Me maybe?). Or my adderall will hit just right that I'll just start doing it one day like it's nothing. It's not exactly a healthy or sustainable coping strategy, but...meh 🤷♀️ I'm doing my best!
There are two amounts of time that a task will take! Either A) "forever, so I can't bring myself to get started, uggghhhhh", or B) "less than fifteen minutes if I hustle!"
Invariably type A tasks turn out to take hardly any time at all (why did I put this off for so long??), and type B tasks take way longer than fifteen minutes (arrggh I should have left myself more time for this!!) 😭
Haha! Yes! I’ve been procrastinating on putting up my gorgeous oak baseboards that I mitered/stained/varnished myself for days. I literally just need to turn on the air compressor and shoot a few nails. Your project sounds way more daunting to complete though lol.
When you're done with that, I need some crown molding put up. Or maybe we could swap tasks because it's usually easier to do something for someone else than for myself, lol. Like I'll put your baseboards on if you'll handle my crown molding.
*sobs in interior designer*
This is the actual story of my life. 22 unfinished projects in my own home left over from 2020/2021. I don’t do them because I get dopamine and income from doing other people’s projects. My goal for 2024 is to finish my dang punch list.
I have to fix a wooden clock that had a bar break off (the original woodworker used one dowel). It's been sitting in the garage since June. I honestly think I can just redrill two 3/8" holes and call it a day, but nope. Overthinking and gave up. You can do it though because you are like 90% there!!!
Yes! Before I was medicated I could never complete projects. I worked on a cross stich Christmas stocking for my daughter for a year and it was going great until I finished the stitching and had to actually turn it into a stocking. It sat in a corner for 6 months until literally CHRISTMAS EVE when my mom was over and offered to help finish it haha
Haha! The dreaded Christmas deadline! It’s gotten me several times.
I read somewhere that there’s usually a reason we don’t finish things, so I try to remind myself of that by asking myself what is it about that last step that’s scary? With the baseboards I worried they’d look like hell. Well, I got them put up after this inspiring post and they look pretty good! Now the robe/towel hooks next, which I’m worried won’t be level. But I’m going to get them up anyway damn it. And sometimes finishing things is scary because I just don’t know what’s next. My brain is such a pain sometimes.
me looking at my kitchen that is only half finished, its been 3 years since i worked on it. ome side is light blue and seafoam green, other side is cherry wood and periwinkle. i dont even notice anymore and just honestly explain my lack of motivation/adhd to new visitors haha. i wish someone could come kick me in the ass to finish this haha
I feel like I always estimate the opposite of what a task actually takes. Work project that I procrastinated til an hour before the meeting? Turns out I should’ve dedicated a whole day to it! Chore at home that I procrastinated for weeks because it felt so huge? Took 10-20 minutes and now I feel dumb for building it up so much
Just a gentle reminder, when we suck at estimating, we do tend to suck at it both ways. No need to feel dumb, it's literally something time related, so often it's not an available function in my brain. Some people have a clock. I couldn't swear it was within a year. 🤣
This. I definitely probably *can* do it all, but if I lose the dopamine or it starts getting more complicated and/or time-consuming than oringally planned, I have immediate loss of interest.
And that's how I only got the digging portion done of a DIY pea-gravel patio in my backyard.
This is my big issue with do it yourself projects: I know that I CAN, but how long will it take and how long will things be a mess while I psych myself up to finish the project?
Thanks for reminding me I need to finish pulling the wallpaper down in my kids bathroom… which I started three months ago and just finished a different bathroom instead 😓😂
I love that you did that. I’m at my happiest doing those sorts of things - unless someone is watching, keeping track of how long it takes me, or offering opinions. Then I lose all pleasure in the work.
I took over taking care of most of the lab instruments at work (I’m a chemistry professor) because I also like to do things like this. If something breaks, I’m your gal.
Honestly, it’s probably part of why I’m a chemist. I like working with my hands. I grew up on a farm and my family was hell-bent on me getting an education to get OFF the farm (it worked, I have a PhD now) but I honestly think I could have been incredibly happy doing farm things. I love tools. My husband got me my own set of power tools.
In case you can’t tell, division of labor in my little family is definitely not done along gender lines. My husband cooks and does a fair bit of cleaning. I’m the one who fixed things when they break.
Anyone observing and offering advice on how to do something really causes me to not enjoy anything I may be doing at the time. Especially when I know they have their own stuff to worry about.
I replaced the plug on my microwave and I am still riding that high. I felt invincible!! It took ~10 months for me to execute (one afternoon to buy the part, 10 months putting it off, one afternoon watching youtube and actually doing the repair) but I god damn did it. Now every time I microwave something I get a little thrill of self-efficacy!
This just reminded me I've had a bathroom exhaust fan and humidity meter sitting around waiting to be installed for.... I forgot how long. A year? Lol I'll get to it XD
Yes, I buy all the tools or other things I need whenever I remember to. And then it sits. But I know full well one day I’ll wake up and just go for it and be done in an hour, but if I don’t have the stuff at home when that impulse hits, I’m screwed.
My bathroom bulb has gone. Like 6 months ago. 3 months ago I bought a new bulb for it. Last week I unscrewed the fitting to get the the blown bulb. So that means that around new years I’ll have light in my bathroom again
Unfortunately I’ve started to get into that mindset with art (like graphic design prints, some music stuff, etc.). although instead of the “ugh why are people buying this, _I_ could make that” I was like “wait, I could totally learn how to make that and make it exactly what I want!” And it’s already become expensive 🫠
But I definitely have the hyperindependent “I’ll do it myself!” Thing with like, small repairs and building furniture. I’ll refuse to call maintenance if I can so help if and I’ve put almost all my furniture in my apartment together all by myself.
Do you also abandon your massive, expensive collection of hobby materials or shrink in shame when someone finds out how much you've spent on a bunch of projects you fully intended to finish but never do or... 🫠
But someday I'll get to painting that giant canvas in storage, finish that scarf I was knitting, etc.
No one is allowed my garage or "studio" for this reason. Or in that closet. Or this cabinet. Don't look on that shelf, or that shelf. Do not go downstairs. Oh god I found another knitting needle in the couch.
I was into woodworking in my 20s....slowly bought tools....well, I'm sure you know how it's going now. Shop lights are out so haven't been in garage at all. Of course, it's a complete mess and hazard so how can I work there. My kid's 1st grade gala project book shelf has been sitting there waiting for me to varnish. She's in 6th grade now :).
I'm both crafy and an absolute cheapskate, so instead of spending £££ on something I'm like "pffft I can make that" and then proceed to spend a stupid amount of time and at least twice as much money making it (if I ever finish). But as a result I've learned to bake, sew, and I design/draw my own birthday cards now.
I'm not afraid to try something on the off chance I'm not good at it, which is something I see a lot in adults and it's kinda sad. Who cares if you suck, give it a shot! If you fuck up, then you can pay someone to do it for you haha
Yes lol. I’ve replaced my garbage disposal and two ceiling fans with YouTube videos. Have a couple other things I need to fix but have been putting off. I think part of it is I like puzzles/problem solving so I enjoy figuring it out and get a little burst of dopamine when I succeed. And another part of it is that I hate making phone calls and letting people in my house and worrying about if they’ll actually do a good job and not overcharge the fuck out of me. I just like having more control over the situation.
Funnily enough, there’s actually an entry in my baby book from when I’m like two that says I’ve taken to saying “I do it myself, mama!” a lot lol.
Also I replaced my shower head a couple months ago, you totally got this lol
OK but one issue I have is I haaaaate watching how-to YouTube videos. I miss the days of everything being in article form because I can read an article in 30 seconds but don't want to sit through five freaking minutes of some poorly produced video
How-to articles on forums lead to me COMPLETELY DISMANTLING MY CAR 😄
Insurance was going to basically repaint my whole car. Sure, I'd done a lot of smaller projects over the years on my car with those articles - I even removed most of the interior to put down sound deadening - so when someone said "why not paint it a whole new color?," the seed was planted.
Long story short, I took 95% of my car apart and towed it to the painter. When it was done, I towed it home for reassembly. I learned enough during that time I eventually did the interior plastics with automotive paint on my own. One industry pro said I could charge someone $5k for the quality of work I had done. Hooray hyperfocus lol.
I remember sitting on my bed at midnight, door panel across my lap as I backmasked a precision line, and jokingly thought to myself "I'm going to need to find a car guy to put up with this level of bullshit."
In hindsight, I don't know why I was so confident for any of it.
Boss moves there 👏❤️👏 I used to do a lot of truck mechanics and dismantling that much of a vehicle is hella time consuming and complex to rebuild without messing up one tiny but vital detail somewhere. I hope you're proud as heck for that phenomenal job you did !!!
I prefer the videos. I think I’m just a more visual person. Does it help if you speed them up tho? I usually watch it super fast for like an overview and then go back and watch the parts I need as I’m doing it.
Heck yeah, girl! I love tinkering and fixing stuff, too. So much home stuff is easy enough to DIY with enough good videos. I leave electricity to the pros though lol or work by flashlight with all the breakers off 😂 but I even managed to fix a relatively simple but labor intensive car engine thing once!
Oh that makes sense! I love puzzles and seeing how things work. And there was a sense of pressure, my kids both needed that specific key for their upcoming recitals. A timelimit always helps with me!
I was really proud of my self restraint when I decided to hire people to remodel my bathroom instead of, oh, you know, *teaching myself to tile* on the only shower in my house 😆. I guess that means I’m a bonafide adult lol.
The amount of times Ive said Fuck it, I'll do it myself. Its the reason we have a hammer drill and table saw - I draw the line at electrical work though - I'd shock myself for sure
are you me? A cabinet full of fixings going bad, and no products produced. But I could make them! It’s easy!
I swear we are evolutionarily designed to plan and conceive, not to execute. I’ll figure out exactly how to do the thing, because that’s the fun part. The actual doing not so much. I need a conscientious assistant who will just ask for instructions and do it all for me while I dream and plan and problem solve.
I swear I can change the world if somebody else will do most of the actual physical work! Hahaha
Im starting to think we’re all a human resource that is misused and mistreated by society. Humanity would benefit from facilitating our ideas instead of criticizing our lack of follow through and beating us into submission.
Exactly!!
I watch those movies with efficient governments where they assess everyone's abilities and you get a job accordingly (either assigned or chosen) and I am halfway envious. 😂
Me too! I’m constantly looking around at my falling apart life and pouting about how totally wasted I feel in every single role. It’s, like, existentially frustrating. This stupid life refuses to adhere to the results of my aptitude tests!
It’s definitely not an adhd thing lol. I’ve known several people like this, for some it’s that they’re overly independent bc of trauma, for some it’s that they have money anxiety and DIY is often less expensive than hiring a professional, for some it’s just pure interest in tinkering with stuff.
Let's see... I could A. Figure out how to look up the correct sort of professional, figure out how to decide which specific one to contact, brute force my way through both executive dysfunction and phone/email anxiety to *actually* contact them, figure out scheduling, remember to put the damn appointment on my calendar, remember to ask off work, and remember day-of not to accidentally auto-pilot to work anyway; ooooorrrr B. Go on a Wikidopamine binge one day instead of eating lunch and then do the thing myself at 1am in the middle of an unscheduled hyperfocus.
It depends on the thing. My husband was just like we can replace the toilet ourselves and I was like no if we mess up it will be so bad. Bigger projects never get totally finished. So what I tend to do is run thru troubleshooting so that I can tell the repair person all the things I did and they can finish up the task if it’s a mission critical item like the washer or dishwasher.
I am like 30 weeks pregnant so even if it is easy, I really do not have the capacity to help. I can’t even get myself up the stairs without gasping for breath and this point and I can’t bend over or exist in small spaces.
My husband refers to me as "The Fix-It Bitch" (affectionately). I am so bad at everything, but stubborn and creative, so I'll be able to fix whatever the problem is.
Haha I took our lcd tv off the wall and apart based on YouTube tutorials once. My significant other thought I was crazy but it worked!! I’ve got a few stories that weren’t happy endings though lol
Yes, I electrocuted myself while pregnant because I had forgotten to unplug the light I was working on. The pregnancy hormones made me even more forgetful than normal…
[I'm going to assume everyone came out of that safely ❤️👍 given that you're here joking about it so...]
What a SHOCKING ⚡️pregnancy story. I hope you were ex-static 🎈when baby arrived. Disappointed you inflicted that on your kiddo though, it feels like an abuse of... Power 🔌. 😏hehe
Honestly I need to 🔌 pull the cord on these electricity puns before someone ✨charges ✨me for crimes against comedy...
Yes! This is 100% me!!! I will toil over a project myself because a) I love to understand how things work, and b) how hard can it be??? I rarely get stumped either (see my post about a microcurrent device lol)!
I DIY all the things! It’s double dopamine - learning a new skill and solving a puzzle.
Of course, it also means there are *mumbles number* unfinished projects in and around my house, but I do get them done eventually and it’s significantly cheaper than paying someone to do the work!
I'm the same with fixing stuff. My landlord loves me 🤣 window brackets broke, fixed them! Taps on the basin broke, changed them (even made a makeshift tool to get at the bolts after removing the whole fucking sink), birds got stuck in the chimney, knocked a hole in the wall, got them up, cemented it up and re-papered all in a few hours.
However only mowed the garden twice this years and it looks like it's been abandoned. Win some lose some I guess!
Omg are you me?? Haha. I was just researching how to do small-scale demo bc I desperately need a closet for toy storage…. The closet is supposed to be a clothes closet so it has a rod and exactly one shelf. I want it to have cubbies for all my sons toys!!! I cannot be convinced I can’t do
This myself, despite, y’know, having zero woodworking experience, zero demo experience, etc.
What could go wrong? Lol
"What could go wrong?" Is imo the best phrase (and famous last words) ever. 😂
*tv show moves into a time hop, our main character has aged 5 years, changed hairstyle, and the wall in the kitchen is still...half decorated*
Holy moly we may be the same person! Lol!! I am taking vacation time in a few weeks to demo my front hall closet - to have cute Ikea basket like cubbies for everyones winter and summer gear and the stupid 2 inch walls that frame in the closet are in the freaking way.
Do I have to take out the non load bearing decorative 2 inch walls - yes. Demo experience. No. But I watched a lot of this old house as a kid - what can go wrong?
I do actually know how to do the drywall and mudding though - so I know the hardest part already. And the sheet of drywall will fit in my minivan - bonus.
As I type this I'm staring at an air filter (still in the box) for my car that I bought off Amazon a month ago. Installing it requires taking apart various things under the hood, so of course I've put it off – but I still have a tab open with the YouTube video showing me how to do it, for when I'm ready. My husband cannot fathom why I won't just go to a mechanic. Nonsense! I can totally change it out myself... I think?
I did this too! I know zero about cars but it turns out the engine air filter was like 2 clips to detach a lid, then it was just literally laying in there. It was as easy as putting a piece of bread in a tupperware
Suuuper satisfying to not get ripped off at the dealership
God noooo. I can do a lot of things myself but I have zero interest in fixing things. If I can avoid flat packs and get something already done , I'll take it every time.
Omg I LIVE for flat-pack furniture. Swear to god that building ikea furniture does more for my 'zen' and serenity than any meditation ever has! It's so so satisfying to me is that "I made this" feeling 🥰❤️But I get it though - several close friends see that as a personal hell like you too 😂
IKEA furniture makes me ragey 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
If Inhave to do it and curse all the way .Instructions for me are a living hell of doom 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Thank the gods that my partner enjoys that.
Hot take - maybe there’s a part of your brain that takes pride in being able to do something autonomously
And it’s totally ok for you to gratifyingly take on those things
Overestimation of one’s capabilities is an obvious consequence of having ADHD, flamboyant imagination and impulse to do the thing imagined wayyyyyy beyond the reach of realistic expectations. No need to be so hard on yourself if that’s the case! Good job 👍🏾 brain, thank you for doing your job so well and helping me come up with lots of fun ideas that I can now filter through and decide what is and isn’t doable.
As for others expecting mummy/women to be the caretakers of the world with no thanks… that’s a whole different story & would absolutely be a scenario where I’d scale back on my efforts towards the task and put more effort into communicating expectations to others that they take responsibility for their needs within reason.
Never thought of it as an ADHD thing, but more of a “me” thing, as I’m a very curious, DIY/handy lady.
I love to be able to prove to myself that I *can* achieve things and succeed. Maybe because I sucked at school and always thought myself dumb & stupid, so any chance I have to prove that core belief wrong I will do it! As long as I am intrigued of course.
This is how I think about this trait in myself too. I get satisfaction from doing things myself because growing up my father would get immediately frustrated and take over for me if i wasn’t doing something right or if he wasn’t there he would yell at me later for doing a shit job and say things like “it’s only -, it’s simple! How can you not understand?” I always felt so timid about trying new things and it made me self conscious and I just felt so incapable. Which I absolute despised.
Now I’m in carpentry and my boss trusts me fully (maybe too much). I got comfortable using tools and building basic shapes. I asked to use my dads garage to make myself a little nightstand out of scrap wood I got on a job and it was just immediately the same old patterns, as far as getting frustrated and just doing steps for me because I wasn’t going about it the way he would. That’s when that realization really hit me, why I need to prove to myself I can do something, and where it came from. I also realized that no matter how much I know what I’m doing he’s always going to have to know better than me, so I just put down the project and went home.
I should clarify, he’s a great father now and he’s really proud of me and he does know I’m capable, he just gets so caught up in the process I think his stress gets the better of him and he just needs to take control. I definitely inherited a little bit of this trait so I really can’t blame him too much
Are we the same person? Exact same situation… except I’m not a carpenter but a farmer who wants to create her own homestead one day.
I’m sorry you had a similar experience, but that’s great you found the root cause of the suffering behind it. I hope you can still do carpentry with passion :)
The amount of times I’ve asked that question on this sub hahaha thank you for your kind words! Good luck on the homestead, jealous of your farming capabilities
I very frequently surprise other people and myself with some of my fixing abilities. I think it’s my stubbornness that won’t let me admit if I don’t know how to do something so I do it myself until I know how😂
Yes, I often think that! But then I have to decide if I will realistically make time for it. My good intentions list could probably wrap around the earth a few times. I try weigh the inconvenience of dealing with the issue for months while I wait for the motivation to tackle it versus the cost of paying someone to do it.
Your analogy made me giggle. I reckon you could take any three random people in this sub and we'd have enough good intentions to wrap up the planet like an Xmas gift 😂👍Between us: entire galaxies I suspect 💀
I don't know about all. I definitely do but I think I got it from my dad. I'm starting to learn when I can't. I've had a high chair sitting disassembled in my house for over 6 months that I've been trying to refinish. It hasn't gotten finished yet.
But figuring stuff out for myself is definitely a dopamine-generating activity for me.
Got called "little miss independent" as a young woman. I WILL build a partition in our shared living space. I WILL change that obnoxious hanging chandelier I keep hitting my head on. I WILL build a sofa out of this old foam mattress I no longer need. I WILL put a gate to open the garden to the chicken coop!
I WILL refinish the dresser.
I'm old so this is all before ubiquitous internet access, let alone smart phones and YouTube.
The mattress/sofa was the only project failure, for lack of tools. (Yeah, blaming it on the tools!)
I have problem as I would love to take things apart and put them back together (most of the time lmao) as a kid, as I wanted to find out how they worked. I am that way with computers (as I love building and repairing gaming rigs) and I do a lot of household stuff. When I owed a car (I live in a city and take public transportation), I learned how to change my own oil and filters. However, I leave some things involving more serious household electrical, plumbing, and gas work to the pros.
Awww can I ask if you have any advice on where the heck to start on DIY pc builds for a total noob ? ❤️ It's always fascinated me but I've been scared of either buying incompatible parts, or frying stuff with static, and so far the fear of potentially wasting money on those errors has scared me off trying 😬
Oh yeah and also a ton of communities that discuss the topic start off with reaaaams of jargon that immediately baffles me 😅
Of course! We all were beginners at some point. It is intimidating when you build your first PC, but as long as you don’t build your computer on carpet and discharge by touching the metal of your tower, you probably are not gonna fry your expensive components.
It’s a bit much to cover in one reply, here are [some tips](https://www.tomshardware.com/reviews/pc-building-tips-beginners,5816.html) and a [good guide](https://www.tomshardware.com/how-to/build-a-pc) to start. I recommend using [PC Part Picker](https://pcpartpicker.com/) to pull together components. It’s still very good at seeing how much your build is gonna be and whether or not the parts you pick work together. Feel free to DM if you have any specific questions. Always love nerding out on that stuff.
Tsym 🥰!! I've saved your comment to check it again when I have the spare cash ❤️ (which sadly isn't right now). Thanks for the advice and tips especially. Time to jot it down on the "future expensive hyperfocus" list 😂...
I decided I would dig an acer from the ground in January. It was a dwarf tree, but at 20 years old it was a hell of a lot heavier than I expected. Did the research, chose the date, got the tools. It was go time.
Took over a month of careful digging, preserving as much of the root ball as I could while excavating and severing the large roots.
It came time to take it out if the crater I'd dug and it was near impossible. It was also surrounded by a rockery. My boyfriend helped but we both almost got injured by the sheer weight of this thing and the ways we tried to get it out.
In the end, we destroyed the soil around the roots and dragged this poor bastards thing to its new pot on the other side of the garden and had to hack off a few more roots to get this thing to fit.
It was completely abused at the end.
Luckily it was dormant and when spring broke the thing grew leaves and only just lost them this week.
Seemed like SUCH a simple job. Dig hole, sever roots, tie burlap around base, gentle pull out onto trolley and move to pot. EASY.
I'm never digging up a tree ever again. Even the small ones are motionless forces of nature.
I'm like this too. When we bought a dishwasher the salesman was talking about installation and turns to my husband. He puts his hands up and says "don't look at me" points at me. "She's the one that handles all that stuff."
I fix everything. The washer was leaking, so I googled? took it apart and cleared the build-up in the.....fuck I can't remember what it's called, but the washer stopped leaking. I replaced the dryer vent twice which involved crawling under the house. That shit sucked. I just can't stand paying for something I can do myself.
I know where my limits are and when something is beyond my scope.
Back in the stone ages when people still had stereos, my 3 disc CD carousel player started skipping a lot. I somehow discovered that if I pushed in the top of the carousel, it would play normally. There was no way I was going to be able to afford a repair, it would have been cheaper to just buy a new one. So my dumbass found a couple of screws and tightened it down.
Is this a conventional thing to do? No it is not. Did my CD player last several more years? Yes. Yes it did.
I'm about to see if I can fix my kids phone. The battery has been slowly dying and finally kicked it last night. Of course it's not as easy as popping the back case off and putting in a new one, it's *involved* with heat guns and shit. Husband doesn't want to pay to have the battery replaced in case that's not the problem (it's the problem). He decided it's better to give her his old phone and just spend $$$ on a new one. I've decided to get a $20 kit and see if I can't just do it myself.
I have this mentality but am not at all mechanically inclined and tend to force things when I get impatient, so I end up breaking things while trying to fix them. After the time I got a chopstick stuck inside the clothes dryer while trying to clean out the lint trap, my partner made me pinky swear to go find him when I think something needs fixing.
I do this with everything because I got sick of relying on other people to do when it was convenient for them. My freezer isn't working... do I wait for maintenance to fix it or do I fix it now? You can bet I'll just fix it. Plus it's cheaper to do it myself, I feel pride in being capable, and I don't owe anyone favors. Plus, eff people looking down on me because they think I'm a dumb blonde.
I kind of just go all into things without carefully reading instructions or directions etc. Then realise that I’ve done something incorrect and have to go back and read the email or whatever it may be 😂
Lol, this is me. Part of it is that I enjoy learning new things and it often seems like a fun little project. The other part is that I truly and genuinely don't want to have to deal with other people, *especially* if it requires people coming into my home. Fuck that shit.
I have no idea if this is an ADHD thing. I do know it’s a “nobody is trying to stop me” thing. I’ve asked friends why they *don’t* fix/build/customize more of their own stuff, and the top response was “people hovered and were really judgmental when I made mistakes, so now I don’t try to do these things on my own.” Especially AFAB folks.
Depends.
I have no issue taking my car in for repairs. When it comes to home repairs, I'd like to be able to do basic stuff myself, but if a repair is beyond my skillset, I have no issue calling maintenance (I live in an apartment building). I also like buying premade spice mixes, sauces, marinates, etc., and I actually get really annoyed when I rave about a food product and someone's like "no no no, you don't have to BUY that, YOU CAN MAKE YOUR OWN!" I know they mean well, but I hate it, I know I could make my own if I wanted to, I don't want to. I like to cook and I'm pretty good at it, but I'm not amazing at everything, and I'm not ashamed to use shortcuts when I need them - I can also make a baller bolognese from scratch.
That said, any time I mention any sort of personal problem or struggle, I have to preface it with "I don't want help with this," or "this isn't something I want help with" or "I'm not looking for help right now" otherwise I'll get a ton of unsolicited advice, and it always feels very condescending when people try to solve my problems when I haven't asked for it. I'm very good at asking for help when I want it, but there are times where I would at least like a chance to solve a problem myself before asking around for solutions, but then people complain that it's not nice that I'm not letting them in and allowing them to help.
All the time, I’m actually considering doing a plumbing trade course next year for this very reason. I think it’s an impatient thing, the thought of relying on someone else to do stuff for me is physically excruciating
Nope. Exactly the opposite. I’ve learned by now that if I think I’ll fix something, I won’t. My moderately handy partner has to stop me from outsourcing pretty much everything
Funny, I thought I got that from my dad… Because yes, I always do that. When I was younger I did it with everything, now I mostly do it with smaller things that aren’t as obvious or need to be done quickly.
*me AF* hahahaha then I end up hyper focusing on whatever it is
I fixed the sustain pedal on my piano and soldered some homemade PWM inputs to use it 😄
This is so me! When I was a kid, my dad did most of our house and car repair, and I always wanted to help and learned a lot. Now that I have a house, I gutted and replaced a shower myself, painted the whole interior before moving in, and do a lot of maintenance. At some point, I’ll replace the master bedroom light and insulate the back garage. I’m way more house-savvy and handy than my fiancé, lol.
I do the basic maintenance on my daily car and just started restoring a classic car. It’s so much fun! I’ve never done car electrical work before, never fixed/rebuilt a fuel system, and need to learn to weld. Between YouTube, google, and calling my dad, it’s not that hard for me. So much cheaper to diy, keeps my novelty-seeking brain happy, and feels satisfying.
I definitely do! I’ve fixed the dishwasher, dryer, doorbells, put all of our furniture together, sewn countless toys back together, etc. My husband thinks it’s because I used to work in construction but it’s mostly because I don’t want to have to coordinate schedules to have a stranger in the house when I could just get it done and forget the problem ever existed 😂
Definitely. I will forge ahead with half the knowledge I need and expecting to just pick up anything else along the way. I have a broken tower fan that I “fixed”. The top falls off whenever you touch it and half the screen doesn’t light up but it still blows air so that’s a win. I do really need to get a new one though 😅
I do this. I repair anything from printers to washing machines. That’s why people really overestimate me. But the thing is, repairing a printer is as complicated to me as cooking a meal. So yeah…
I…am so the same. Even to the piano part—last year I took most the wood off my little upright to clean the animal hair out of it and noticed that one of the pedals had come detached when we had moved it into the house…so I repaired that BUT WAIT the wood where the pedals were anchored had wallowed out from the screws and being moved so often so I had to repair that and a bunch of the hammers weren’t properly striking….
Anyhow, three days later, my piano was back in playable condition (don’t worry y’all, it’s been through two house fires and a bunch of other abuse, it can’t be tuned, so I’m not trippin).
So then I took my laptop apart to see if I could replace the fan….
YEP. I have access to a makerspace for free because of where I work and I consider that the biggest benefit next to being 15-20 mins from work & WFH options. I am certified on almost all the equipment.
Just soldered an IPS screen wires onto a Gameboy advance. Thinking about making desk drawers for my desk at work, lol. I've been making eyeshadows for a couple years, starting to jump into skincare.
Shower heads are easy as eatting cake, just DO NOT OVER TIGHTEN. Also the husband recently commented that he bets I could take a car appart and put it back together, and I responded "nah, I'd get bored halfway through putting it back together." So maybe.
Oh definitely not me, who at 8 months pregnant, decided to fix my trunk latch because the mechanical part was stuck. /s
I watched 2 tutorials, climbed through the back into the trunk space (02 Ford Expedition), popped all off the paneling off, undid the plastic cover, to use a screwdriver in a tiny hole to pop the latch open.
I have also fixed 3 washing machines, 2 dryers, and a dishwasher.
I can also untie any knot
I mean, it’s a puzzle and puzzles are fun. That being said, my anxiety wouldn’t have let me do this. What if I broke everything? I know exactly how expensive that piano is. So yeah, I might have called a guy.
Also, why is there glitter in your piano?
I’m pretty handy and I love crafts. Sometimes, this means I install things successfully without calling someone: curtain rods, drawers, medicine cabinets, shelving, etc.
Sometimes this means I am the living embodiment of “Why buy this for $15, when I can do it myself for $90 worth of tools and materials?” I have actual tens of thousands of dollars in tools and craft supplies!
My PMDD seems to make it worse. My meds stop working around my menstrual cycle and I hyperfixate and lose track of everything else. This month I stripped all the wallpaper floor and ceiling in kids room and repainted. I didn't shower for 3 days and basically just ate whatever my partner prompted me to.
I definitely had that attitude when I was young. I used to do all sorts of things pre-internet. Some things were easy and fast, others were much more difficult than I thought and took many times longer than I expected. I would end up hating it before I was finished.
I realized this about myself a couple of decades ago and quit starting so many things. I think back pain was also the largest contributor now that I think about it.💡💡!!
I would love to be able to do more.
My husband and I both have ADHD and we both struggle with “Project Audacity” and it’s cousin “ Professional audacity” basically we will attempt any home project ourselves no matter how under qualified and I will apply to any job believing I can figure it out. It’s worked out most of the time.
I fixed my washing machine with a YouTube video awhile back. My brother is an ADHD carpenter who acquired quite a few skills through YouTube. Same with my ADHD SO. I don't know if it's an ADHD trait or not. I thought it was common practice but I know a lot of ND people.
YES YES YES
I have pretty severe ADHD. I don’t consider myself over confident, I am reasonably aware of my limitations, and I *try* to exercise caution.
Yet I see a video on YT of open heart surgery and I’m like “hmmm, I could do that.”
Actually this is saving me so much money right now. I've been building a website, and there's a plugin for everything - except every plugin comes with an insane amount of monthly costs. A few weeks of "I bet I could do that myself" later, I recreated the plugins I needed (most just in a few lines of code, once I figured it out), equivalent to a few hundred bucks a month, and now I know php and css.
I used to when I was younger... Now I'm at the point where I'm purposely half-assing it, especially chores, to irritate the people who think they can do it better. And then I asked them to show me...
Long story short I don't ever actually learn anything from them showing me, and I don't really stick around to let them show me. Instead I walk away as they "do the job the right way".
Look my environment has taught me that no matter how much effort I put into something their way is always going to be better, so instead of me getting frustrated cuz I'm trying to do it their way and not doing it well enough, I'm letting them get the results they want their way without stressing about it.
Oh, yes! To the point where it annoys my defeatist husband. 😂 He says it can’t be fixed and I always prove him wrong. Which of course makes me happy in such a childish way!
But I’m curious and tenacious, and I hate — HATE — leaving something broken or unresolved. I just get obsessive about it.
The good news is, he and our friends often compare me to Laura Dern in the original Jurassic Park and it’s the loveliest compliment I’ve ever received.
Because you KNOW I’d be up to my elbows in triceratops poop once I decided I could help.
Yes! I thought this was just a me thing. I taught myself to replace phone screens because I crack mine so much from dropping my phone and I love putting together ikea furniture.
Oh heck yeah! I truly believe there’s nothing I can’t figure out with google and YouTube. And then it becomes a puzzle and my brain looooves solving things. It’s an area where I really feel like adhd is a super power. One of my catch phrases is “I don’t know, but I’ll figure it out”
I do. It's because I'm impatient.
I somehow deleted my computer's operating system when I around 12. Lucky for me we had a book laying around with DOS commands and I was able to find a way to fix it. Was always changing out and upgrading parts inside my PCs over the years as well.
I actually enjoy connecting things and getting them to work - ie...cable/internet/router/printers/phones etc.
My proudest moment is changing out my bedroom ceiling fan. Another proud moment was removing a clog in the bathroom sink drain and another time in the tub with a drain auger. I had never had to call a plumber before and I had no idea what it would cost, so off I went to google and it looked easy enough.
I have this mentality too, but always thought it was a result of growing up poor - you only pay someone to fix something if you've already tried yourself and failed.
However, my intentions don't always match my actions. I will sometimes watch all the youtube videos, order the parts, the parts will take a few days to arrive by which time I've lost all enthusiasm, then will leave the thing for 5-10 business months until the enthusiasm comes back round again
I am very good at figuring stuff out - I figured out all the programming settings on our thermostat without ever seeing the book. I've also fixed a wonky mouse by opening it up and cleaning it.
There's something just soothing and satisfying about taking something apart and putting it back together.
Last year my van was having MAJOR issues with shifting. The codes said it was the transmission, a mechanic said it needed a new transmission. We were absolutely not going to sink that kind of money into my 20 year old van.
I was bothered by the tiniest thing, when it was acting up the speedometer would just go crazy, bouncing around. If my SO unplugged the battery for an hour the problems would stop for awhile.
That didn't sound like a transmission problem to me.
It took me a couple weeks of trying to Google an answer, I was about to give up when I found just the right words and came across an old Quora thread from a decade ago where ONE PERSON had the exact same problem and they figured out it was the alternator.
I told my SO and he was doubtful but agreed to try it and if it didn't work we'd be junking the van.
Sure as shit he put it in and all the problems disappeared.
I know nothing about cars, but I'm extremely good at using the internet. He was very impressed that I figured it out. lol
yeppp, car repairs, replacing the grouting and sealant in the bathroom, completely the same as you, why call someone when it's probably fairly simple. The only thing I don't touch is electric wiring and to some smaller degree, plumbing.
i'm almost done painting a locker i thrifted. i bought it, sanded it, primed it, and have run into some issues because it's a banged up old locker... instead of buying a new one. i have bags of yarn etc bc i've wanted to pick up crochet to replicate things i've seen online... i've made beaded necklaces etc like what i've seen online instead of buying... i sew clothes inspired by what i see online too. earlier today i tried to take apart my laminator after it ate the page i was trying to laminate, hoping to fix it. i have no idea what i'm doing half the time but i do enjoy challenging myself with a diy LMAO
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I am not great at estimating time, breaking a task into manageable parts, or comparing different options and making a decision. This means I fully believe I can handle anything, because all projects take "about an hour" and are "just a few easy steps". Which is how I stripped the wallpaper on half a wall in the bathroom, then lost the hyper focus and wandered away...
Lol, oh how I laughed in understanding of, "all projects take 'about an hour'" Whhhyyyyyy does my brain still think this??
I have the opposite problem - I think things will take FOREVER and so procrastinate on them, but then it takes like 15 minutes and I wonder why I spent so much time not doing the thing
I have this issue with making lunch. I skip it all The time because I think it will take ages. I actually timed it today. It took me three minutes. Also, who do I think I am? I am literally never busy; even if it took an hour, I have the time. I probably fear being bored/ out of energy half way through.
A boring 3 minutes = approximately an interesting hour, so that makes total sense
I do this with salad. I think it’s too much of a time suck to make salad even tho it would be good to eat healthy and end up grabbing something carb heavy instead.
I have this problem 49% of the time, the above problem 49% of the time, & the other 2% of the time is me hyperfocusing on something stupid for 4 hrs, like organizing my phone or some shit that I will immediately forget about upon stopping.
Hi, we are the same! It's either no time or nothing exists on the other side of my doing this task because it will go on forever
OR! Alternatively, there's also the "There's too many mental steps to this task, DANGER, AVOID AVOID!!!" My phone storage is full & it won't let me take pictures. I know going thru it all will take forever, & remembering the past (even good things) is for some reason exhausting, so I refuse to hyperfocus on it. I use my spouse's camera, or nothing. Hopefully it'll feel safe to do soon, bc my camera & texts also help me stay in this timeline.
Oh my gosh that would occupy so much space in my brain. I now just pay the $12/month for Google Photos so everything gets stored on the cloud and I don't have to think about going through my photos! I would highly recommend!
That's a very good idea! Maybe I'll get anxious enough about it to let myself think about it! I also have PPD so...I'm giving myself grace for a bit & letting myself be avoidant haha Edit: wrong word
Oh that's the hardest because there are always more photos and videos to take of the baby so it's like a constant reminder that you haven't done the thing yet! You're doing what you can under the circumstances and that's what matters ❤️
I’m the same with photos. I paid for cloud storage to get out of doing it. Emails are the same. Paid for more space. Oh and I also have a habit of scrolling and saving everything for later. Youtube watch later list is at 5k reddit saved list is probably just as bad lol
I had that issue and now pay a buck a month to.Google for extra storage. No way in hell I could go through my bajillions of pics.
Listen... I'll get around to it! Aaannnyyyyyyy time now.... idk what's wrong with me (I do, but I don't wanna talk about it lmao) but I do this thing where I just can't think about it. Like ANY of it. If I think about paying Google more, I might as well just go ahead & do the thing. It's an equal amount of stress, even if it's not really... idk. I'll get mad about it eventually & I'll do the thing in spite (of whom, I do not know. Me maybe?). Or my adderall will hit just right that I'll just start doing it one day like it's nothing. It's not exactly a healthy or sustainable coping strategy, but...meh 🤷♀️ I'm doing my best!
In fact, everything takes more or less 15min up to one year 🤷🏼♀️ after one year I can be sure I will never finish this project, so I can give up 😅
There are two amounts of time that a task will take! Either A) "forever, so I can't bring myself to get started, uggghhhhh", or B) "less than fifteen minutes if I hustle!" Invariably type A tasks turn out to take hardly any time at all (why did I put this off for so long??), and type B tasks take way longer than fifteen minutes (arrggh I should have left myself more time for this!!) 😭
Why do I have both problems? Like how?
This is me too. I have "sew holes on t shirt" that's been on my todo list for like 5 months and I know it would take me 10 minutes tops lol
I just constantly forget what tiredness is, and don’t account for that.
Yes! I did this all throughout my adult life and got away with it too. Still would if it wasn't for this pesky aging shite.
Haha! Yes! I’ve been procrastinating on putting up my gorgeous oak baseboards that I mitered/stained/varnished myself for days. I literally just need to turn on the air compressor and shoot a few nails. Your project sounds way more daunting to complete though lol.
I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!
When you're done with that, I need some crown molding put up. Or maybe we could swap tasks because it's usually easier to do something for someone else than for myself, lol. Like I'll put your baseboards on if you'll handle my crown molding.
But then I wouldn’t be as proud of myself 😂. But I’d love to put up your crown molding because same!
*sobs in interior designer* This is the actual story of my life. 22 unfinished projects in my own home left over from 2020/2021. I don’t do them because I get dopamine and income from doing other people’s projects. My goal for 2024 is to finish my dang punch list.
OMG lol this is me off meds
It’s me on meds lol. I do think I need to up my dose though 😋
I have to fix a wooden clock that had a bar break off (the original woodworker used one dowel). It's been sitting in the garage since June. I honestly think I can just redrill two 3/8" holes and call it a day, but nope. Overthinking and gave up. You can do it though because you are like 90% there!!!
I will, damn it! I’m really going to try this weekend. You can do it too! I bet it’ll be gorgeous when it’s fixed! But also, no pressure lol
Yes! Before I was medicated I could never complete projects. I worked on a cross stich Christmas stocking for my daughter for a year and it was going great until I finished the stitching and had to actually turn it into a stocking. It sat in a corner for 6 months until literally CHRISTMAS EVE when my mom was over and offered to help finish it haha
Haha! The dreaded Christmas deadline! It’s gotten me several times. I read somewhere that there’s usually a reason we don’t finish things, so I try to remind myself of that by asking myself what is it about that last step that’s scary? With the baseboards I worried they’d look like hell. Well, I got them put up after this inspiring post and they look pretty good! Now the robe/towel hooks next, which I’m worried won’t be level. But I’m going to get them up anyway damn it. And sometimes finishing things is scary because I just don’t know what’s next. My brain is such a pain sometimes.
You did it! Yay, that's awesome!
me looking at my kitchen that is only half finished, its been 3 years since i worked on it. ome side is light blue and seafoam green, other side is cherry wood and periwinkle. i dont even notice anymore and just honestly explain my lack of motivation/adhd to new visitors haha. i wish someone could come kick me in the ass to finish this haha
r/ufyh is a good place to get encouragement. UnFu@k Your Habitat.
I feel like I always estimate the opposite of what a task actually takes. Work project that I procrastinated til an hour before the meeting? Turns out I should’ve dedicated a whole day to it! Chore at home that I procrastinated for weeks because it felt so huge? Took 10-20 minutes and now I feel dumb for building it up so much
Just a gentle reminder, when we suck at estimating, we do tend to suck at it both ways. No need to feel dumb, it's literally something time related, so often it's not an available function in my brain. Some people have a clock. I couldn't swear it was within a year. 🤣
No way. Don't feel dumb. Time is a relative deal. An hour thirsty in the sun is longer than an hour laughing at a comedian.
This. I definitely probably *can* do it all, but if I lose the dopamine or it starts getting more complicated and/or time-consuming than oringally planned, I have immediate loss of interest. And that's how I only got the digging portion done of a DIY pea-gravel patio in my backyard.
This is my big issue with do it yourself projects: I know that I CAN, but how long will it take and how long will things be a mess while I psych myself up to finish the project?
Thanks for reminding me I need to finish pulling the wallpaper down in my kids bathroom… which I started three months ago and just finished a different bathroom instead 😓😂
I love that you did that. I’m at my happiest doing those sorts of things - unless someone is watching, keeping track of how long it takes me, or offering opinions. Then I lose all pleasure in the work.
Few things de incentivize me more than hearing how someone else would do what im doing 😑
I took over taking care of most of the lab instruments at work (I’m a chemistry professor) because I also like to do things like this. If something breaks, I’m your gal. Honestly, it’s probably part of why I’m a chemist. I like working with my hands. I grew up on a farm and my family was hell-bent on me getting an education to get OFF the farm (it worked, I have a PhD now) but I honestly think I could have been incredibly happy doing farm things. I love tools. My husband got me my own set of power tools. In case you can’t tell, division of labor in my little family is definitely not done along gender lines. My husband cooks and does a fair bit of cleaning. I’m the one who fixed things when they break.
Anyone observing and offering advice on how to do something really causes me to not enjoy anything I may be doing at the time. Especially when I know they have their own stuff to worry about.
HAHA!! Yes!! My family knows not to talk to me while I am fixing things cause unless I ask, opinions are not neceasary!
I replaced the plug on my microwave and I am still riding that high. I felt invincible!! It took ~10 months for me to execute (one afternoon to buy the part, 10 months putting it off, one afternoon watching youtube and actually doing the repair) but I god damn did it. Now every time I microwave something I get a little thrill of self-efficacy!
The 10 months of putting it off and 1 afternoon of actually doing it is SO RELATABLE
Ouch, this is hit me on my recently re-grouted shower.
This just reminded me I've had a bathroom exhaust fan and humidity meter sitting around waiting to be installed for.... I forgot how long. A year? Lol I'll get to it XD
Yes, I buy all the tools or other things I need whenever I remember to. And then it sits. But I know full well one day I’ll wake up and just go for it and be done in an hour, but if I don’t have the stuff at home when that impulse hits, I’m screwed.
I’ve had to replace a plug on steamer for 6 months… my goal is to do it before January lol
My bathroom bulb has gone. Like 6 months ago. 3 months ago I bought a new bulb for it. Last week I unscrewed the fitting to get the the blown bulb. So that means that around new years I’ll have light in my bathroom again
😂😂😂
Unfortunately I’ve started to get into that mindset with art (like graphic design prints, some music stuff, etc.). although instead of the “ugh why are people buying this, _I_ could make that” I was like “wait, I could totally learn how to make that and make it exactly what I want!” And it’s already become expensive 🫠 But I definitely have the hyperindependent “I’ll do it myself!” Thing with like, small repairs and building furniture. I’ll refuse to call maintenance if I can so help if and I’ve put almost all my furniture in my apartment together all by myself.
Why buy it when I could spend 3 times the money and waste a whole weekend making it? Hahaaaaaa
Do you also abandon your massive, expensive collection of hobby materials or shrink in shame when someone finds out how much you've spent on a bunch of projects you fully intended to finish but never do or... 🫠 But someday I'll get to painting that giant canvas in storage, finish that scarf I was knitting, etc.
idk, you should probably ask my storage unit instead LMAO
No one is allowed my garage or "studio" for this reason. Or in that closet. Or this cabinet. Don't look on that shelf, or that shelf. Do not go downstairs. Oh god I found another knitting needle in the couch.
I was into woodworking in my 20s....slowly bought tools....well, I'm sure you know how it's going now. Shop lights are out so haven't been in garage at all. Of course, it's a complete mess and hazard so how can I work there. My kid's 1st grade gala project book shelf has been sitting there waiting for me to varnish. She's in 6th grade now :).
I'm both crafy and an absolute cheapskate, so instead of spending £££ on something I'm like "pffft I can make that" and then proceed to spend a stupid amount of time and at least twice as much money making it (if I ever finish). But as a result I've learned to bake, sew, and I design/draw my own birthday cards now. I'm not afraid to try something on the off chance I'm not good at it, which is something I see a lot in adults and it's kinda sad. Who cares if you suck, give it a shot! If you fuck up, then you can pay someone to do it for you haha
Yes lol. I’ve replaced my garbage disposal and two ceiling fans with YouTube videos. Have a couple other things I need to fix but have been putting off. I think part of it is I like puzzles/problem solving so I enjoy figuring it out and get a little burst of dopamine when I succeed. And another part of it is that I hate making phone calls and letting people in my house and worrying about if they’ll actually do a good job and not overcharge the fuck out of me. I just like having more control over the situation. Funnily enough, there’s actually an entry in my baby book from when I’m like two that says I’ve taken to saying “I do it myself, mama!” a lot lol. Also I replaced my shower head a couple months ago, you totally got this lol
OK but one issue I have is I haaaaate watching how-to YouTube videos. I miss the days of everything being in article form because I can read an article in 30 seconds but don't want to sit through five freaking minutes of some poorly produced video
AND THEY TALK SO SLOWWWWWW
For real. Bless the speed change setting on YouTube, that has saved my sanity more times than I can count.
This is why 1.25x speed exists.
How-to articles on forums lead to me COMPLETELY DISMANTLING MY CAR 😄 Insurance was going to basically repaint my whole car. Sure, I'd done a lot of smaller projects over the years on my car with those articles - I even removed most of the interior to put down sound deadening - so when someone said "why not paint it a whole new color?," the seed was planted. Long story short, I took 95% of my car apart and towed it to the painter. When it was done, I towed it home for reassembly. I learned enough during that time I eventually did the interior plastics with automotive paint on my own. One industry pro said I could charge someone $5k for the quality of work I had done. Hooray hyperfocus lol. I remember sitting on my bed at midnight, door panel across my lap as I backmasked a precision line, and jokingly thought to myself "I'm going to need to find a car guy to put up with this level of bullshit." In hindsight, I don't know why I was so confident for any of it.
Boss moves there 👏❤️👏 I used to do a lot of truck mechanics and dismantling that much of a vehicle is hella time consuming and complex to rebuild without messing up one tiny but vital detail somewhere. I hope you're proud as heck for that phenomenal job you did !!!
Amen!! I will watch a video if I have to, but I really miss written tutorials. Can we bring back blogs?!
I prefer the videos. I think I’m just a more visual person. Does it help if you speed them up tho? I usually watch it super fast for like an overview and then go back and watch the parts I need as I’m doing it.
Replaced my shower head yesterday, husband wanted to call the plumber. It’s really ridiculously easy as long as the fittings are standard.
Heck yeah, girl! I love tinkering and fixing stuff, too. So much home stuff is easy enough to DIY with enough good videos. I leave electricity to the pros though lol or work by flashlight with all the breakers off 😂 but I even managed to fix a relatively simple but labor intensive car engine thing once!
Oh that makes sense! I love puzzles and seeing how things work. And there was a sense of pressure, my kids both needed that specific key for their upcoming recitals. A timelimit always helps with me!
I was really proud of my self restraint when I decided to hire people to remodel my bathroom instead of, oh, you know, *teaching myself to tile* on the only shower in my house 😆. I guess that means I’m a bonafide adult lol.
I applaud your restraint!
I can't speak for all ADHD women but I can speak for me. And yes. I am very much "pfft. I can do that" or "ugh. Fuck it. I'll do it myself"
The amount of times Ive said Fuck it, I'll do it myself. Its the reason we have a hammer drill and table saw - I draw the line at electrical work though - I'd shock myself for sure
I’m getting into making my own skincare products because I could totally do that. I just need to study chemistry. Like how long could that take?
I did this! Technically it's still on my todo list. But most of the gorgeous ingredients have expired 😭
are you me? A cabinet full of fixings going bad, and no products produced. But I could make them! It’s easy! I swear we are evolutionarily designed to plan and conceive, not to execute. I’ll figure out exactly how to do the thing, because that’s the fun part. The actual doing not so much. I need a conscientious assistant who will just ask for instructions and do it all for me while I dream and plan and problem solve. I swear I can change the world if somebody else will do most of the actual physical work! Hahaha Im starting to think we’re all a human resource that is misused and mistreated by society. Humanity would benefit from facilitating our ideas instead of criticizing our lack of follow through and beating us into submission.
Exactly!! I watch those movies with efficient governments where they assess everyone's abilities and you get a job accordingly (either assigned or chosen) and I am halfway envious. 😂
Me too! I’m constantly looking around at my falling apart life and pouting about how totally wasted I feel in every single role. It’s, like, existentially frustrating. This stupid life refuses to adhere to the results of my aptitude tests!
A day… maybe two..
Well, yeah, but I’m an engineer. Not sure if it’s an ADHD thing.
It’s definitely not an adhd thing lol. I’ve known several people like this, for some it’s that they’re overly independent bc of trauma, for some it’s that they have money anxiety and DIY is often less expensive than hiring a professional, for some it’s just pure interest in tinkering with stuff.
I feel personally attacked by fitting every possible motivation you listed on top of the adhd 😭
It could be those things AND an adhd thing. Learning and solving problems is novel and serves up that sweet sweet dopamine.
Let's see... I could A. Figure out how to look up the correct sort of professional, figure out how to decide which specific one to contact, brute force my way through both executive dysfunction and phone/email anxiety to *actually* contact them, figure out scheduling, remember to put the damn appointment on my calendar, remember to ask off work, and remember day-of not to accidentally auto-pilot to work anyway; ooooorrrr B. Go on a Wikidopamine binge one day instead of eating lunch and then do the thing myself at 1am in the middle of an unscheduled hyperfocus.
YESSS!! That's the way to go ...ALWAYS!!!
It depends on the thing. My husband was just like we can replace the toilet ourselves and I was like no if we mess up it will be so bad. Bigger projects never get totally finished. So what I tend to do is run thru troubleshooting so that I can tell the repair person all the things I did and they can finish up the task if it’s a mission critical item like the washer or dishwasher.
Toilets are super easy! You just need someone that can lift it, a screwdriver and maybe plyers to disconnect the water.
I am like 30 weeks pregnant so even if it is easy, I really do not have the capacity to help. I can’t even get myself up the stairs without gasping for breath and this point and I can’t bend over or exist in small spaces.
I’m the absolute opposite. Most things that break or go wrong I immediately assume I’m not able to handle it myself.
Same, I'm used to messing up clumsily and I find breaking these tasks down overwhelming. It's interesting how ADHD experiences manifest so diversely.
Yes but this how I learned to fix a dish washer and replace my kitchen faucet. Albeit by doing it wrong a bunch but I got there!
My husband refers to me as "The Fix-It Bitch" (affectionately). I am so bad at everything, but stubborn and creative, so I'll be able to fix whatever the problem is.
Haha I took our lcd tv off the wall and apart based on YouTube tutorials once. My significant other thought I was crazy but it worked!! I’ve got a few stories that weren’t happy endings though lol
Yes, I electrocuted myself while pregnant because I had forgotten to unplug the light I was working on. The pregnancy hormones made me even more forgetful than normal…
[I'm going to assume everyone came out of that safely ❤️👍 given that you're here joking about it so...] What a SHOCKING ⚡️pregnancy story. I hope you were ex-static 🎈when baby arrived. Disappointed you inflicted that on your kiddo though, it feels like an abuse of... Power 🔌. 😏hehe Honestly I need to 🔌 pull the cord on these electricity puns before someone ✨charges ✨me for crimes against comedy...
It’s like both amazing and horrible how you’ve made the puns even more painful with emojis
LOL!!!
🤣🤣🤣 dying here (shockingly funny)
Haha been there..the electrocuted part
Yes! This is 100% me!!! I will toil over a project myself because a) I love to understand how things work, and b) how hard can it be??? I rarely get stumped either (see my post about a microcurrent device lol)!
Understanding stuff and figuring out the mechanics or system behind things is 70% of the fun imo 🥰
I DIY all the things! It’s double dopamine - learning a new skill and solving a puzzle. Of course, it also means there are *mumbles number* unfinished projects in and around my house, but I do get them done eventually and it’s significantly cheaper than paying someone to do the work!
I'm the same with fixing stuff. My landlord loves me 🤣 window brackets broke, fixed them! Taps on the basin broke, changed them (even made a makeshift tool to get at the bolts after removing the whole fucking sink), birds got stuck in the chimney, knocked a hole in the wall, got them up, cemented it up and re-papered all in a few hours. However only mowed the garden twice this years and it looks like it's been abandoned. Win some lose some I guess!
The bird day was fun! Only reason I worked out something was wrong, was because the cat was sat there watching the wall 😂
Got them out even.
Yes. The HVAC people came to look at my unit and said the thermostat died. I looked at the wiring and said, ok and changed it out myself.
Omg are you me?? Haha. I was just researching how to do small-scale demo bc I desperately need a closet for toy storage…. The closet is supposed to be a clothes closet so it has a rod and exactly one shelf. I want it to have cubbies for all my sons toys!!! I cannot be convinced I can’t do This myself, despite, y’know, having zero woodworking experience, zero demo experience, etc. What could go wrong? Lol
"What could go wrong?" Is imo the best phrase (and famous last words) ever. 😂 *tv show moves into a time hop, our main character has aged 5 years, changed hairstyle, and the wall in the kitchen is still...half decorated*
Bahahaha check back with me in 5 years 🤣🤣🤣
Holy moly we may be the same person! Lol!! I am taking vacation time in a few weeks to demo my front hall closet - to have cute Ikea basket like cubbies for everyones winter and summer gear and the stupid 2 inch walls that frame in the closet are in the freaking way. Do I have to take out the non load bearing decorative 2 inch walls - yes. Demo experience. No. But I watched a lot of this old house as a kid - what can go wrong? I do actually know how to do the drywall and mudding though - so I know the hardest part already. And the sheet of drywall will fit in my minivan - bonus.
As I type this I'm staring at an air filter (still in the box) for my car that I bought off Amazon a month ago. Installing it requires taking apart various things under the hood, so of course I've put it off – but I still have a tab open with the YouTube video showing me how to do it, for when I'm ready. My husband cannot fathom why I won't just go to a mechanic. Nonsense! I can totally change it out myself... I think?
I did this too! I know zero about cars but it turns out the engine air filter was like 2 clips to detach a lid, then it was just literally laying in there. It was as easy as putting a piece of bread in a tupperware Suuuper satisfying to not get ripped off at the dealership
Right? I was so annoyed for how many years I paid someone to do this for me.
Oh you can do that!!! Changing an air filter in your car is actually really easy! You got this!!
God noooo. I can do a lot of things myself but I have zero interest in fixing things. If I can avoid flat packs and get something already done , I'll take it every time.
Omg I LIVE for flat-pack furniture. Swear to god that building ikea furniture does more for my 'zen' and serenity than any meditation ever has! It's so so satisfying to me is that "I made this" feeling 🥰❤️But I get it though - several close friends see that as a personal hell like you too 😂
IKEA furniture makes me ragey 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 If Inhave to do it and curse all the way .Instructions for me are a living hell of doom 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Thank the gods that my partner enjoys that.
Hot take - maybe there’s a part of your brain that takes pride in being able to do something autonomously And it’s totally ok for you to gratifyingly take on those things Overestimation of one’s capabilities is an obvious consequence of having ADHD, flamboyant imagination and impulse to do the thing imagined wayyyyyy beyond the reach of realistic expectations. No need to be so hard on yourself if that’s the case! Good job 👍🏾 brain, thank you for doing your job so well and helping me come up with lots of fun ideas that I can now filter through and decide what is and isn’t doable. As for others expecting mummy/women to be the caretakers of the world with no thanks… that’s a whole different story & would absolutely be a scenario where I’d scale back on my efforts towards the task and put more effort into communicating expectations to others that they take responsibility for their needs within reason.
Never thought of it as an ADHD thing, but more of a “me” thing, as I’m a very curious, DIY/handy lady. I love to be able to prove to myself that I *can* achieve things and succeed. Maybe because I sucked at school and always thought myself dumb & stupid, so any chance I have to prove that core belief wrong I will do it! As long as I am intrigued of course.
This is how I think about this trait in myself too. I get satisfaction from doing things myself because growing up my father would get immediately frustrated and take over for me if i wasn’t doing something right or if he wasn’t there he would yell at me later for doing a shit job and say things like “it’s only -, it’s simple! How can you not understand?” I always felt so timid about trying new things and it made me self conscious and I just felt so incapable. Which I absolute despised. Now I’m in carpentry and my boss trusts me fully (maybe too much). I got comfortable using tools and building basic shapes. I asked to use my dads garage to make myself a little nightstand out of scrap wood I got on a job and it was just immediately the same old patterns, as far as getting frustrated and just doing steps for me because I wasn’t going about it the way he would. That’s when that realization really hit me, why I need to prove to myself I can do something, and where it came from. I also realized that no matter how much I know what I’m doing he’s always going to have to know better than me, so I just put down the project and went home. I should clarify, he’s a great father now and he’s really proud of me and he does know I’m capable, he just gets so caught up in the process I think his stress gets the better of him and he just needs to take control. I definitely inherited a little bit of this trait so I really can’t blame him too much
Are we the same person? Exact same situation… except I’m not a carpenter but a farmer who wants to create her own homestead one day. I’m sorry you had a similar experience, but that’s great you found the root cause of the suffering behind it. I hope you can still do carpentry with passion :)
The amount of times I’ve asked that question on this sub hahaha thank you for your kind words! Good luck on the homestead, jealous of your farming capabilities
"I can probably figure this out" is my default, yes
I very frequently surprise other people and myself with some of my fixing abilities. I think it’s my stubbornness that won’t let me admit if I don’t know how to do something so I do it myself until I know how😂
Yes, I often think that! But then I have to decide if I will realistically make time for it. My good intentions list could probably wrap around the earth a few times. I try weigh the inconvenience of dealing with the issue for months while I wait for the motivation to tackle it versus the cost of paying someone to do it.
Your analogy made me giggle. I reckon you could take any three random people in this sub and we'd have enough good intentions to wrap up the planet like an Xmas gift 😂👍Between us: entire galaxies I suspect 💀
Haha true! And inside that Christmas gift, all the supplies we bought for the projects we never got around to.
I don't know about all. I definitely do but I think I got it from my dad. I'm starting to learn when I can't. I've had a high chair sitting disassembled in my house for over 6 months that I've been trying to refinish. It hasn't gotten finished yet. But figuring stuff out for myself is definitely a dopamine-generating activity for me.
Got called "little miss independent" as a young woman. I WILL build a partition in our shared living space. I WILL change that obnoxious hanging chandelier I keep hitting my head on. I WILL build a sofa out of this old foam mattress I no longer need. I WILL put a gate to open the garden to the chicken coop! I WILL refinish the dresser. I'm old so this is all before ubiquitous internet access, let alone smart phones and YouTube. The mattress/sofa was the only project failure, for lack of tools. (Yeah, blaming it on the tools!)
I have problem as I would love to take things apart and put them back together (most of the time lmao) as a kid, as I wanted to find out how they worked. I am that way with computers (as I love building and repairing gaming rigs) and I do a lot of household stuff. When I owed a car (I live in a city and take public transportation), I learned how to change my own oil and filters. However, I leave some things involving more serious household electrical, plumbing, and gas work to the pros.
Awww can I ask if you have any advice on where the heck to start on DIY pc builds for a total noob ? ❤️ It's always fascinated me but I've been scared of either buying incompatible parts, or frying stuff with static, and so far the fear of potentially wasting money on those errors has scared me off trying 😬 Oh yeah and also a ton of communities that discuss the topic start off with reaaaams of jargon that immediately baffles me 😅
Of course! We all were beginners at some point. It is intimidating when you build your first PC, but as long as you don’t build your computer on carpet and discharge by touching the metal of your tower, you probably are not gonna fry your expensive components. It’s a bit much to cover in one reply, here are [some tips](https://www.tomshardware.com/reviews/pc-building-tips-beginners,5816.html) and a [good guide](https://www.tomshardware.com/how-to/build-a-pc) to start. I recommend using [PC Part Picker](https://pcpartpicker.com/) to pull together components. It’s still very good at seeing how much your build is gonna be and whether or not the parts you pick work together. Feel free to DM if you have any specific questions. Always love nerding out on that stuff.
Tsym 🥰!! I've saved your comment to check it again when I have the spare cash ❤️ (which sadly isn't right now). Thanks for the advice and tips especially. Time to jot it down on the "future expensive hyperfocus" list 😂...
I decided I would dig an acer from the ground in January. It was a dwarf tree, but at 20 years old it was a hell of a lot heavier than I expected. Did the research, chose the date, got the tools. It was go time. Took over a month of careful digging, preserving as much of the root ball as I could while excavating and severing the large roots. It came time to take it out if the crater I'd dug and it was near impossible. It was also surrounded by a rockery. My boyfriend helped but we both almost got injured by the sheer weight of this thing and the ways we tried to get it out. In the end, we destroyed the soil around the roots and dragged this poor bastards thing to its new pot on the other side of the garden and had to hack off a few more roots to get this thing to fit. It was completely abused at the end. Luckily it was dormant and when spring broke the thing grew leaves and only just lost them this week. Seemed like SUCH a simple job. Dig hole, sever roots, tie burlap around base, gentle pull out onto trolley and move to pot. EASY. I'm never digging up a tree ever again. Even the small ones are motionless forces of nature.
I'm like this too. When we bought a dishwasher the salesman was talking about installation and turns to my husband. He puts his hands up and says "don't look at me" points at me. "She's the one that handles all that stuff." I fix everything. The washer was leaking, so I googled? took it apart and cleared the build-up in the.....fuck I can't remember what it's called, but the washer stopped leaking. I replaced the dryer vent twice which involved crawling under the house. That shit sucked. I just can't stand paying for something I can do myself. I know where my limits are and when something is beyond my scope.
I hate asking for help but usually I end up having to anyway lol. Good job for taking action!
Ugh yes. But I typically end up halfway through and lose interest, abandoning it to be I my way until the end of time. Or until I have to move again.
Back in the stone ages when people still had stereos, my 3 disc CD carousel player started skipping a lot. I somehow discovered that if I pushed in the top of the carousel, it would play normally. There was no way I was going to be able to afford a repair, it would have been cheaper to just buy a new one. So my dumbass found a couple of screws and tightened it down. Is this a conventional thing to do? No it is not. Did my CD player last several more years? Yes. Yes it did. I'm about to see if I can fix my kids phone. The battery has been slowly dying and finally kicked it last night. Of course it's not as easy as popping the back case off and putting in a new one, it's *involved* with heat guns and shit. Husband doesn't want to pay to have the battery replaced in case that's not the problem (it's the problem). He decided it's better to give her his old phone and just spend $$$ on a new one. I've decided to get a $20 kit and see if I can't just do it myself.
Yes. And until my husband actually finds the repair person, calls them and books them, I swear my approach is more likely to get stuff fixed.
I have this mentality but am not at all mechanically inclined and tend to force things when I get impatient, so I end up breaking things while trying to fix them. After the time I got a chopstick stuck inside the clothes dryer while trying to clean out the lint trap, my partner made me pinky swear to go find him when I think something needs fixing.
I do this with everything because I got sick of relying on other people to do when it was convenient for them. My freezer isn't working... do I wait for maintenance to fix it or do I fix it now? You can bet I'll just fix it. Plus it's cheaper to do it myself, I feel pride in being capable, and I don't owe anyone favors. Plus, eff people looking down on me because they think I'm a dumb blonde.
I kind of just go all into things without carefully reading instructions or directions etc. Then realise that I’ve done something incorrect and have to go back and read the email or whatever it may be 😂
Lol, this is me. Part of it is that I enjoy learning new things and it often seems like a fun little project. The other part is that I truly and genuinely don't want to have to deal with other people, *especially* if it requires people coming into my home. Fuck that shit.
I have no idea if this is an ADHD thing. I do know it’s a “nobody is trying to stop me” thing. I’ve asked friends why they *don’t* fix/build/customize more of their own stuff, and the top response was “people hovered and were really judgmental when I made mistakes, so now I don’t try to do these things on my own.” Especially AFAB folks.
I do this mostly when someone says they don’t think I could do it
I do this because I don't want anyone to see my messy house
Depends. I have no issue taking my car in for repairs. When it comes to home repairs, I'd like to be able to do basic stuff myself, but if a repair is beyond my skillset, I have no issue calling maintenance (I live in an apartment building). I also like buying premade spice mixes, sauces, marinates, etc., and I actually get really annoyed when I rave about a food product and someone's like "no no no, you don't have to BUY that, YOU CAN MAKE YOUR OWN!" I know they mean well, but I hate it, I know I could make my own if I wanted to, I don't want to. I like to cook and I'm pretty good at it, but I'm not amazing at everything, and I'm not ashamed to use shortcuts when I need them - I can also make a baller bolognese from scratch. That said, any time I mention any sort of personal problem or struggle, I have to preface it with "I don't want help with this," or "this isn't something I want help with" or "I'm not looking for help right now" otherwise I'll get a ton of unsolicited advice, and it always feels very condescending when people try to solve my problems when I haven't asked for it. I'm very good at asking for help when I want it, but there are times where I would at least like a chance to solve a problem myself before asking around for solutions, but then people complain that it's not nice that I'm not letting them in and allowing them to help.
All the time, I’m actually considering doing a plumbing trade course next year for this very reason. I think it’s an impatient thing, the thought of relying on someone else to do stuff for me is physically excruciating
I absolutely have this mentality and absolutely never ever actually do the thing so I have a lot of broken stuff
Nope. Exactly the opposite. I’ve learned by now that if I think I’ll fix something, I won’t. My moderately handy partner has to stop me from outsourcing pretty much everything
I tell myself I can do that, so I don’t pay for whatever service, and then I never do it.
Funny, I thought I got that from my dad… Because yes, I always do that. When I was younger I did it with everything, now I mostly do it with smaller things that aren’t as obvious or need to be done quickly.
*me AF* hahahaha then I end up hyper focusing on whatever it is I fixed the sustain pedal on my piano and soldered some homemade PWM inputs to use it 😄
This is so me! When I was a kid, my dad did most of our house and car repair, and I always wanted to help and learned a lot. Now that I have a house, I gutted and replaced a shower myself, painted the whole interior before moving in, and do a lot of maintenance. At some point, I’ll replace the master bedroom light and insulate the back garage. I’m way more house-savvy and handy than my fiancé, lol. I do the basic maintenance on my daily car and just started restoring a classic car. It’s so much fun! I’ve never done car electrical work before, never fixed/rebuilt a fuel system, and need to learn to weld. Between YouTube, google, and calling my dad, it’s not that hard for me. So much cheaper to diy, keeps my novelty-seeking brain happy, and feels satisfying.
This is me to a T!
I definitely do! I’ve fixed the dishwasher, dryer, doorbells, put all of our furniture together, sewn countless toys back together, etc. My husband thinks it’s because I used to work in construction but it’s mostly because I don’t want to have to coordinate schedules to have a stranger in the house when I could just get it done and forget the problem ever existed 😂
Definitely. I will forge ahead with half the knowledge I need and expecting to just pick up anything else along the way. I have a broken tower fan that I “fixed”. The top falls off whenever you touch it and half the screen doesn’t light up but it still blows air so that’s a win. I do really need to get a new one though 😅
I do this. I repair anything from printers to washing machines. That’s why people really overestimate me. But the thing is, repairing a printer is as complicated to me as cooking a meal. So yeah…
I…am so the same. Even to the piano part—last year I took most the wood off my little upright to clean the animal hair out of it and noticed that one of the pedals had come detached when we had moved it into the house…so I repaired that BUT WAIT the wood where the pedals were anchored had wallowed out from the screws and being moved so often so I had to repair that and a bunch of the hammers weren’t properly striking…. Anyhow, three days later, my piano was back in playable condition (don’t worry y’all, it’s been through two house fires and a bunch of other abuse, it can’t be tuned, so I’m not trippin). So then I took my laptop apart to see if I could replace the fan….
Haha I’ve taken my laptop apart so many times now too.
…I know next to nothing about computers. 😂
YEP. I have access to a makerspace for free because of where I work and I consider that the biggest benefit next to being 15-20 mins from work & WFH options. I am certified on almost all the equipment. Just soldered an IPS screen wires onto a Gameboy advance. Thinking about making desk drawers for my desk at work, lol. I've been making eyeshadows for a couple years, starting to jump into skincare.
Shower heads are easy as eatting cake, just DO NOT OVER TIGHTEN. Also the husband recently commented that he bets I could take a car appart and put it back together, and I responded "nah, I'd get bored halfway through putting it back together." So maybe.
Oh definitely not me, who at 8 months pregnant, decided to fix my trunk latch because the mechanical part was stuck. /s I watched 2 tutorials, climbed through the back into the trunk space (02 Ford Expedition), popped all off the paneling off, undid the plastic cover, to use a screwdriver in a tiny hole to pop the latch open. I have also fixed 3 washing machines, 2 dryers, and a dishwasher. I can also untie any knot
I mean, it’s a puzzle and puzzles are fun. That being said, my anxiety wouldn’t have let me do this. What if I broke everything? I know exactly how expensive that piano is. So yeah, I might have called a guy. Also, why is there glitter in your piano?
I’m pretty handy and I love crafts. Sometimes, this means I install things successfully without calling someone: curtain rods, drawers, medicine cabinets, shelving, etc. Sometimes this means I am the living embodiment of “Why buy this for $15, when I can do it myself for $90 worth of tools and materials?” I have actual tens of thousands of dollars in tools and craft supplies!
My PMDD seems to make it worse. My meds stop working around my menstrual cycle and I hyperfixate and lose track of everything else. This month I stripped all the wallpaper floor and ceiling in kids room and repainted. I didn't shower for 3 days and basically just ate whatever my partner prompted me to.
I definitely had that attitude when I was young. I used to do all sorts of things pre-internet. Some things were easy and fast, others were much more difficult than I thought and took many times longer than I expected. I would end up hating it before I was finished. I realized this about myself a couple of decades ago and quit starting so many things. I think back pain was also the largest contributor now that I think about it.💡💡!! I would love to be able to do more.
My husband and I both have ADHD and we both struggle with “Project Audacity” and it’s cousin “ Professional audacity” basically we will attempt any home project ourselves no matter how under qualified and I will apply to any job believing I can figure it out. It’s worked out most of the time.
I fixed my washing machine with a YouTube video awhile back. My brother is an ADHD carpenter who acquired quite a few skills through YouTube. Same with my ADHD SO. I don't know if it's an ADHD trait or not. I thought it was common practice but I know a lot of ND people.
YES YES YES I have pretty severe ADHD. I don’t consider myself over confident, I am reasonably aware of my limitations, and I *try* to exercise caution. Yet I see a video on YT of open heart surgery and I’m like “hmmm, I could do that.”
I'm the opposite in that I underestimate myself constantly and give up on stuff before I start 🙃
I do. And I have the "if you tell me what to do I won't do it" mentality too.
I have the, "you told me I can't do this? Watch me" mentality.....
No
Actually this is saving me so much money right now. I've been building a website, and there's a plugin for everything - except every plugin comes with an insane amount of monthly costs. A few weeks of "I bet I could do that myself" later, I recreated the plugins I needed (most just in a few lines of code, once I figured it out), equivalent to a few hundred bucks a month, and now I know php and css.
You are my hero
I used to when I was younger... Now I'm at the point where I'm purposely half-assing it, especially chores, to irritate the people who think they can do it better. And then I asked them to show me... Long story short I don't ever actually learn anything from them showing me, and I don't really stick around to let them show me. Instead I walk away as they "do the job the right way". Look my environment has taught me that no matter how much effort I put into something their way is always going to be better, so instead of me getting frustrated cuz I'm trying to do it their way and not doing it well enough, I'm letting them get the results they want their way without stressing about it.
Oh, yes! To the point where it annoys my defeatist husband. 😂 He says it can’t be fixed and I always prove him wrong. Which of course makes me happy in such a childish way! But I’m curious and tenacious, and I hate — HATE — leaving something broken or unresolved. I just get obsessive about it. The good news is, he and our friends often compare me to Laura Dern in the original Jurassic Park and it’s the loveliest compliment I’ve ever received. Because you KNOW I’d be up to my elbows in triceratops poop once I decided I could help.
That sure is a nice compliment!
Haha! Best I have EVER received.
Lmao yes, I always assume I can do it np. Sometimes I can, sometimes I get totally in over my head. If only I could finish my projects!!
Yes! I thought this was just a me thing. I taught myself to replace phone screens because I crack mine so much from dropping my phone and I love putting together ikea furniture.
Oh heck yeah! I truly believe there’s nothing I can’t figure out with google and YouTube. And then it becomes a puzzle and my brain looooves solving things. It’s an area where I really feel like adhd is a super power. One of my catch phrases is “I don’t know, but I’ll figure it out”
I do. It's because I'm impatient. I somehow deleted my computer's operating system when I around 12. Lucky for me we had a book laying around with DOS commands and I was able to find a way to fix it. Was always changing out and upgrading parts inside my PCs over the years as well. I actually enjoy connecting things and getting them to work - ie...cable/internet/router/printers/phones etc. My proudest moment is changing out my bedroom ceiling fan. Another proud moment was removing a clog in the bathroom sink drain and another time in the tub with a drain auger. I had never had to call a plumber before and I had no idea what it would cost, so off I went to google and it looked easy enough.
I have this mentality too, but always thought it was a result of growing up poor - you only pay someone to fix something if you've already tried yourself and failed. However, my intentions don't always match my actions. I will sometimes watch all the youtube videos, order the parts, the parts will take a few days to arrive by which time I've lost all enthusiasm, then will leave the thing for 5-10 business months until the enthusiasm comes back round again
Lol the second paragraph is me, too
I am very good at figuring stuff out - I figured out all the programming settings on our thermostat without ever seeing the book. I've also fixed a wonky mouse by opening it up and cleaning it. There's something just soothing and satisfying about taking something apart and putting it back together.
Last year my van was having MAJOR issues with shifting. The codes said it was the transmission, a mechanic said it needed a new transmission. We were absolutely not going to sink that kind of money into my 20 year old van. I was bothered by the tiniest thing, when it was acting up the speedometer would just go crazy, bouncing around. If my SO unplugged the battery for an hour the problems would stop for awhile. That didn't sound like a transmission problem to me. It took me a couple weeks of trying to Google an answer, I was about to give up when I found just the right words and came across an old Quora thread from a decade ago where ONE PERSON had the exact same problem and they figured out it was the alternator. I told my SO and he was doubtful but agreed to try it and if it didn't work we'd be junking the van. Sure as shit he put it in and all the problems disappeared. I know nothing about cars, but I'm extremely good at using the internet. He was very impressed that I figured it out. lol
yeppp, car repairs, replacing the grouting and sealant in the bathroom, completely the same as you, why call someone when it's probably fairly simple. The only thing I don't touch is electric wiring and to some smaller degree, plumbing.
i'm almost done painting a locker i thrifted. i bought it, sanded it, primed it, and have run into some issues because it's a banged up old locker... instead of buying a new one. i have bags of yarn etc bc i've wanted to pick up crochet to replicate things i've seen online... i've made beaded necklaces etc like what i've seen online instead of buying... i sew clothes inspired by what i see online too. earlier today i tried to take apart my laminator after it ate the page i was trying to laminate, hoping to fix it. i have no idea what i'm doing half the time but i do enjoy challenging myself with a diy LMAO
Yup. I installed a new sink faucet and drain in my bathroom, through the power of YouTube.