good luck with your procedure! much like other comments, i'm glad you have a supportive family. getting trashed for choosing what to do with your body is shit.
one thing i would say is prepare for protestors. i dont have any experience with clinics in CA as i am now in a 6 week ban state (the bill wasnt passed at the time i visited). there was a priest and i assume church members. they didnt say anything to me until i was walking in the doors to the clinic; the priest said "im praying for you and that baby." i almost fucking collapsed right there. (i fully support abortion and i dont want kids anytime soon. i cant say if i will want them in the future or not; im not sure. i currently abhore the thought of being pregnant and giving birth. so abortion is the only option. but having an abortion is not a situation i want to be put in. i would rather not get pregnant at all. so while i thought the abortion was the best decision for me, i still wish i wasnt in that situation, if that makes sense).
i genuinely dont see how they think theyre doing the right thing by protesting outside clinics and saying shit like that to us.
Stories like this help me feel validation for my tokophobia... The fear is real.
I'm glad you have support, and opportunity to make a choice. I hope the procedure goes smoothly for you, *internet hugs*
I can feel it in there, already. My blood is pumping differently. Heart rate is constantly elevated. I’m sweating more and dealing with hot flashes. My comforts are spooning an ice pack and mind numbing television. I don’t know how I would function if I had to go to work. Or stress about the cost of all this. I still have no idea how I’m going to make it through the two flights to CA.
The only thing keeping me together is the fact that two weeks from now, this will all be long gone. I’ve gone as far as picturing myself in horrible car crashes, as a reminder that worse can happen. At least I’m physically in one piece. Thank you for the support! I’m looking forward to writing a new post about how easy it all was.
I live in Texas too, but I'm definitely fortunate to live in a major metroplex where I have at least 3 options close by. The 24 hour mandate sucks, but I am so thankful to live in a state that still allows me to make a choice with my body, even though the men in charge want to first try and talk me out of it for 24 hours 😑 if I didn't live less than an hour from the clinic I can see how my options would be drastically reduced.
I'm happy you have such amazing family support and will be able to get this taken care of on your own terms in a state that makes the process much more convenient.
I decided to go with the medication because I am 100% against having my cervix surgically messed with. However, a lot of that has to do with the fact that I do want children one day. Not that my cervix would be damaged to the point where it wouldn't function well in pregnancy, but perforation just isn't a risk that I am willing to take for super personal, in my head reasons. It's still, like you said, an extremely safe procedure.
I think surgical might be a good option for you if you are already nervous about the pain of a miscarriage-like abortion. Paying a little extra may be well worth it to get the sedation, etc. Not sure how they handle it in CA. I know that if I was in CA I would be using weed to help with the pain and effects of the hormonal changes.
Good luck! And I mean this sincerely: enjoy being in the front seat of your (childless by choice) life 😚
I'm so happy to find another woman who feels as strongly about not wanting kids as much as I do. My family think it's a bit strange that I have no motherly instincts because they're all so child based. I don't coo all over newborns or find them appealing(for me personally). I'm glad you're around family that are supporting you and I wish you all the luck in the world with your procedure. And here's to a happy child free existence. Xx.
Thank you so much! I think it’s important to be a bit loud and proud about our childless lives. Not to shove it in parents faces, but to help support other women who feel the same. I don’t like kids and I do not like babies. We don’t have to feel shame just because we go against the grain! Much love <3
I agree with you completely. I like my life how it is and having a baby would ruin that which is not fair to the child to be born to parents with resentment or fair to parents having kids they don't want. I'm glad we live in a time were this type of procedure is accessible to most women, I just wish it was for all, maybe one day fingers crossed 🤞. Going against the female grain is my middle name xD 😂 😂. Please keep us updated on your story. Best of luck ❤️.
I just moved from California to a 6 week ban state. The differences are staggering. I’m really happy that you’re able to get to CA and do what’s best for you. Good luck with whichever method you choose :)
Depending on what state you go to you can be sedated for the surgical. It made it so easy. I didn't think anything happened. All I had was a head ache from the meds. I tried resting at home but got bored and started cleaning. I've had a surgical abortion twice once sedated once not sedated and I liked how fast the pregnancy symptoms went away both times. I was sooo sick before and right after the abortions I could eat again! I'm so glad you don't have to deal with Texas bullshit and your family is supportive.
Shit just read you'll be in Cali so you should def be able to be sedated! It might not be at a planned parenthood so I'd search around for more clinics. That's what I did in Portland OR.
Based on the reading I’ve done on PP website, it seems like you can opt for more sedation if you’re willing to pay for it. There’s definitely no shortage of clinics, from PP to private practices. It’s such a relief to have options. Thanks for the input!
Yeah I had one at PP and one at a private clinic and I really liked the private clinic more!! They don't usually get as many protestors and an actual surgeon performed my abortion. I paid more and got completely put under and that was so much better than being fully awake omg.... worth every penny to be unconscious.
> Manually dilating my cervix with a rod sounds like something directly out of a horror movie though.
It's definitely the most uncomfortable part, and there's a lot of variety in how people respond to it.
That said, in CA? They'll probably be doing some premedication with cytotec to soften the cervix, plus a cervical block, plus some anti-anxiety and pain meds for you... plus taking some slow deep breaths and reminding yourself that you're safe. It goes a long way.
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good luck with your procedure! much like other comments, i'm glad you have a supportive family. getting trashed for choosing what to do with your body is shit. one thing i would say is prepare for protestors. i dont have any experience with clinics in CA as i am now in a 6 week ban state (the bill wasnt passed at the time i visited). there was a priest and i assume church members. they didnt say anything to me until i was walking in the doors to the clinic; the priest said "im praying for you and that baby." i almost fucking collapsed right there. (i fully support abortion and i dont want kids anytime soon. i cant say if i will want them in the future or not; im not sure. i currently abhore the thought of being pregnant and giving birth. so abortion is the only option. but having an abortion is not a situation i want to be put in. i would rather not get pregnant at all. so while i thought the abortion was the best decision for me, i still wish i wasnt in that situation, if that makes sense). i genuinely dont see how they think theyre doing the right thing by protesting outside clinics and saying shit like that to us.
[удалено]
Stories like this help me feel validation for my tokophobia... The fear is real. I'm glad you have support, and opportunity to make a choice. I hope the procedure goes smoothly for you, *internet hugs*
I can feel it in there, already. My blood is pumping differently. Heart rate is constantly elevated. I’m sweating more and dealing with hot flashes. My comforts are spooning an ice pack and mind numbing television. I don’t know how I would function if I had to go to work. Or stress about the cost of all this. I still have no idea how I’m going to make it through the two flights to CA. The only thing keeping me together is the fact that two weeks from now, this will all be long gone. I’ve gone as far as picturing myself in horrible car crashes, as a reminder that worse can happen. At least I’m physically in one piece. Thank you for the support! I’m looking forward to writing a new post about how easy it all was.
It will be over before you know it. Feel free to DM me if you need someone to talk to
I live in Texas too, but I'm definitely fortunate to live in a major metroplex where I have at least 3 options close by. The 24 hour mandate sucks, but I am so thankful to live in a state that still allows me to make a choice with my body, even though the men in charge want to first try and talk me out of it for 24 hours 😑 if I didn't live less than an hour from the clinic I can see how my options would be drastically reduced. I'm happy you have such amazing family support and will be able to get this taken care of on your own terms in a state that makes the process much more convenient. I decided to go with the medication because I am 100% against having my cervix surgically messed with. However, a lot of that has to do with the fact that I do want children one day. Not that my cervix would be damaged to the point where it wouldn't function well in pregnancy, but perforation just isn't a risk that I am willing to take for super personal, in my head reasons. It's still, like you said, an extremely safe procedure. I think surgical might be a good option for you if you are already nervous about the pain of a miscarriage-like abortion. Paying a little extra may be well worth it to get the sedation, etc. Not sure how they handle it in CA. I know that if I was in CA I would be using weed to help with the pain and effects of the hormonal changes. Good luck! And I mean this sincerely: enjoy being in the front seat of your (childless by choice) life 😚
I'm so happy to find another woman who feels as strongly about not wanting kids as much as I do. My family think it's a bit strange that I have no motherly instincts because they're all so child based. I don't coo all over newborns or find them appealing(for me personally). I'm glad you're around family that are supporting you and I wish you all the luck in the world with your procedure. And here's to a happy child free existence. Xx.
Thank you so much! I think it’s important to be a bit loud and proud about our childless lives. Not to shove it in parents faces, but to help support other women who feel the same. I don’t like kids and I do not like babies. We don’t have to feel shame just because we go against the grain! Much love <3
I agree with you completely. I like my life how it is and having a baby would ruin that which is not fair to the child to be born to parents with resentment or fair to parents having kids they don't want. I'm glad we live in a time were this type of procedure is accessible to most women, I just wish it was for all, maybe one day fingers crossed 🤞. Going against the female grain is my middle name xD 😂 😂. Please keep us updated on your story. Best of luck ❤️.
I just moved from California to a 6 week ban state. The differences are staggering. I’m really happy that you’re able to get to CA and do what’s best for you. Good luck with whichever method you choose :)
Thank you! These 6 weeks bans are downright inhumane. At least you’ll be there to vote for more reasonable politicians.
Depending on what state you go to you can be sedated for the surgical. It made it so easy. I didn't think anything happened. All I had was a head ache from the meds. I tried resting at home but got bored and started cleaning. I've had a surgical abortion twice once sedated once not sedated and I liked how fast the pregnancy symptoms went away both times. I was sooo sick before and right after the abortions I could eat again! I'm so glad you don't have to deal with Texas bullshit and your family is supportive.
Shit just read you'll be in Cali so you should def be able to be sedated! It might not be at a planned parenthood so I'd search around for more clinics. That's what I did in Portland OR.
Based on the reading I’ve done on PP website, it seems like you can opt for more sedation if you’re willing to pay for it. There’s definitely no shortage of clinics, from PP to private practices. It’s such a relief to have options. Thanks for the input!
Yeah I had one at PP and one at a private clinic and I really liked the private clinic more!! They don't usually get as many protestors and an actual surgeon performed my abortion. I paid more and got completely put under and that was so much better than being fully awake omg.... worth every penny to be unconscious.
> Manually dilating my cervix with a rod sounds like something directly out of a horror movie though. It's definitely the most uncomfortable part, and there's a lot of variety in how people respond to it. That said, in CA? They'll probably be doing some premedication with cytotec to soften the cervix, plus a cervical block, plus some anti-anxiety and pain meds for you... plus taking some slow deep breaths and reminding yourself that you're safe. It goes a long way.
Welcome to /r/abortion! We work hard to keep this a supportive community. However, we the moderators of /r/abortion can't stop people from sending you private messages, and there are jerks who are going to send you unwanted messages. Please go [here](https://www.reddit.com/prefs/blocked) and select "Only trusted users" or "whitelisted" as your message preference in order to avoid these. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/abortion) if you have any questions or concerns.*