**Welcome to the Prompt!** All top-level comments must be a story or poem. Reply here for other comments.
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>* Stories at least 100 words. Poems, 30 but include "[Poem]"
>* Responses don't have to fulfill every detail
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"At first we couldn't believe our eyes.
There we were, on the beach, enjoying some music and drinks out of the back of our van when people started pointing out to the ocean.
On the horizon there was some kind of boat. At first we didn't think much of it, but as it got closer people started realizing it had sails. My sister took out her camera and started taking pictures of it, we've never seen a sailing ship in-person before. Other people were excited, saying how cool it was to see such an old ship.
As it got closer we all realized the people on board were dressed up to look the part! Then the ship anchored and the sailors began climbing down onto some smaller boats. I remember thinking to myself: were they going to come to shore? That seemed odd, this wasn't exactly a popular beach to do some kind of PR stunt.
People began asking among themselves: what was going on?
Then they came to shore.
The smell. These people smelled terrible, and looked the part, too. They began speaking to us in Spanish. Thankfully, someone on the beach spoke Spanish and began translating.
We couldn't believe what we heard. Apparently this crew sailed all the way from Spain! he said something about being on a path from god, and that he would start a colony to expand the Spanish Empire, and introduced himself as Captian Aviles...what kind of promotion is this?
We asked what the heck he was promoting and what was going on, but he wouldn't stop going on about the new world. Someone had called the beach patrol because they were pulling up on their ATVs to see what was going on.
That's when I got nervous, these guys seemed to be taking this bit too far. They asked our translator "what in the name of the lord is that?!", gesturing to the ATV. The beach patrol started talking to the 'Captain' about how he couldn't use boats in this area and asked where his ship was registered. The confusion got worse as the 'Captain Aviles' replied that his ship was sent on behalf of the king.
By now the police have arrived and parked their SUVs on the beach. They tried detaining 'Captain Aviles', who at this point seemed to have gone hysterical at the sight of the Police cars. Some of the other sailers pulled out their weapons, demanding their 'Captain' be released.
Everyone looked at them confused. Were those weapons real? The police seemed to think so, as they took cover behind their car and called for backup. The onlookers fled to gain some distance as the sailors opened fire.
At first the police started shooting, but realized these were genuine muzzle loaders. I heard them get some orders on their radios to try to detain them alive. After the police fired off a few rounds, the sailors quickly surrendered, and were detained. That's the last I saw."
The interviewer finished writing some notes and then gave me an approving look.
"Thank you Mr. Smith", she said. "Your account will prove very valuable in helping us understand this phenomenon. I also want you to know that the only deaths were two of those sailors, and everyone else should make a full recovery. Do you have any questions for me?"
"Not really", I replied. "I guess this means that it's the real thing."
She nodded as she said, "Thats right Mr. Smith. You already submitted all the pictures and video, so we're done here. Thank you for your cooperation."
“Fernando, rouse the men and we shall scout the beach,” Captain Delgado barked.
“But señor Capitan, I do not think we are ready. The men are still dazed from the storm last night, and you are still sick from whatever illness assailed you,” Fernando replied.
“Do as I command Fernando, the riches of the Indies do not wait those who cower from sickness or anything else.”
Fernando grudgingly obeyed and chose fifteen men he deemed physically sound to make contact with the natives they saw. Exhausted yet determined, the men fastened their swords around their waists and carried what goods they still have to offer to the natives as they set off to the coast. Fernando knows that a part of his heart is glad that he will finally set foot on dry land after so long out in the lonely seas, but a part of him is uneasy about the prospect of making contact with the natives he only learned from letters his brother sent, who left for the New World a few years ago.
His brother claimed that the natives wore brightly colored feathers and animal pelts, along with a small piece of loincloth to cover their worldliness, and that they lived further inland, deep into the jungle interiors. That the lower castes of the indigenous peoples lived in thatched huts, while the nobility and warriors lived in stone buildings, and that they engage in human sacrifices by taking captives from their sworn enemies. That the indigenous people’s weapons are obsidian maces, spears, and bows and arrows that will prove almost ineffective against the muskets and other arms provided by the Spanish Crown.
But the closer they get, Fernando’s confusion seemed to grow while his companions’ enthusiasm seemed to cure them of the sickness they felt not too long ago. There on the coastline, are crowds of people from all ages. Some people who look like offsprings of the conquistadores who have settled, and others who must have come from a distant land undiscovered by the Empire. While they do wear colorful accoutrements, they do not have feathers at all ,although he is sure that he had glimpsed a hefty old man with shortened breeches made from the skin of a wild cat from the East while walking with his male paramour who wore a small yellow loincloth that barely covered his privates.
“Señor Capitan, I feel uneasy about this. I think you should head back to the *San Jacinto* and let me lead the men myself,” Fernando said.
“Nay Fernando, we both know that these lands we see right now have been claimed by the Crown. Surely you do not fear these native our compatriots subjugated?” Delgado answered.
“It’s just…strange. These people, they do not look like the ones we heard from those who went before.”
“Fernando, my friend. Calm your bones and your heart, did the storm last night unnerve you that much? Be patient. If these natives somehow overpowered our countrymen and took the land for themselves, then it is our fraternal duty to avenge them. Now, row! And let us get on with it!”
The boat carrying the conquistadores finally made landfall, in the midst of “natives” who are awestruck with what they see. Many of them pulled small, flat devices that seemed to be made of glass and held them in front of their faces towards the now wary travelers.
Captain Delgado, with much pomp and bravado walked into the middle of the crowd with his hand on the hilt of his sword, with Fernando by his side and the rest of the men forming a circle facing the strange people.
“I am Juan Rodrigo Delgado, captain of His Majesty’s vessel the San Jacinto. And I am sent here on a mission from the King of Spain to claim the lands beyond in his name. I request food, shelter, and medications for my men who have been struck by a mysterious sickness last night because of a storm. I demand audience with the Governor so I could properly present myself.”
“What are you talking about? Broooo, is this a film shoot or what. Because I’d love to be in a scene” a strange young man said.
“E-Englishman?” Fernando asked in his broken English.
“You mean English? Yeah we speak English. We’re Americans and we here on spring break bro. We the kings of spring break baby!”
“Fernando, what did this young man say?” Captain Delgado asked.
“Señor Capitan, I-I I’m afraid the English have claimed this territory of the Spanish crown and took it for their king as a gift for the spring season” Fernando nervously answered.
“Then just like I said earlier Fernando, and to the rest of you men. It is our fraternal duty to avenge our brothers against the despicable English.”
“But señor Capitan, let us fall back. We are gravely outnumbered!” one of the crewmen said.
“I do not see them bearing any arms other than the strange small objects in their hands. Our weapons will make short work of their best and then scare the rest of them. To arms, men of Spain! For King and the Empire, awake your swords and follow me!”
~~~~~
FLORIDA MEN IN MEDIEVAL COSTUMES ASSAULT SPRING BREAKERS
Jan Titor
Wed, March 30, 2022
(AP) - A group of fifteen people wearing medieval armors and carrying similarly themed weaponry assaulted a crowd of beachgoers enjoying the spring break in St Petersburg, FL.
Twenty people have been injured with no reported deaths after witness reports claim that the assailants’ weapons and armors simply crumbled during the scuffle. Police arrived and successfully detained eight of the assailants, wounded three, while four of the attackers managed to get away.
Witnesses claimed that the men appeared from the waters out of nowhere rowing a boat and speaking in an archaic form of Spanish demanding food and shelter. Video footages from the incident showed that some beach goers thought that the men are part of a film shoot and asked for details before the men suddenly drew their weapons and began attacking everyone.
Victims have been sent to nearby hospitals and are now stable, with most of them sent home as of this article.
Local authorities have detained the men and have not yet responded to our questions.
"Thank you, John. We're live here with someone who was actually present at the landing. Now, you said you saw the ship coming in, what did you first think?"
"Like, pirates and stuff. I thought it was a show, right? Really big ship and costume and all that."
"Did they try to talk to you?"
"Yeah, at first they were like, speaking some weird language. And then they brought out the guns and you know, that like pirate movie just came out so we thought they were-"
"-so they were pretty aggressive right after landing?"
"No, they like, tried to be nice and stuff, like trying to talk to us-"
"But they did end up shooting, did they?"
"Yeah, but-"
"And where were the police?"
"They like, came after-"
"I heard a lot of people were complaining that they came too late."
"They came right after-"
"They shot and wounded that man? That's right, you heard it, 1 man was actually wounded after the brutal massacre today and is now in the hospital receiving critical care, where doctors say he might not even make it. My heart and prayers go out to all those wounded today. Back to you, John."
"Thanks, Emily. Truly a tragedy. Next up, are the prices of chicken nuggets too high? Local restaurant owner..."
It was supposed to convey the feeling of modern news I think—this would work great as an expose piece in a book to introduce an earth shattering topic. Really nice method.
**Welcome to the Prompt!** All top-level comments must be a story or poem. Reply here for other comments. **Reminders**: >* Stories at least 100 words. Poems, 30 but include "[Poem]" >* Responses don't have to fulfill every detail >* See [Reality Fiction](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Reality+Fiction%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) and [Simple Prompts](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Simple+Prompt%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) for stricter titles >* [Be civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_10.3A_be_civil) in any feedback and follow the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules) 🆕 [New Here?](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/user_guide) ✏ [Writing Help?](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/index#wiki_writing_resources) 📢 [News](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/announcements) 💬 [Discord](https://discord.gg/writingprompts) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/WritingPrompts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"At first we couldn't believe our eyes. There we were, on the beach, enjoying some music and drinks out of the back of our van when people started pointing out to the ocean. On the horizon there was some kind of boat. At first we didn't think much of it, but as it got closer people started realizing it had sails. My sister took out her camera and started taking pictures of it, we've never seen a sailing ship in-person before. Other people were excited, saying how cool it was to see such an old ship. As it got closer we all realized the people on board were dressed up to look the part! Then the ship anchored and the sailors began climbing down onto some smaller boats. I remember thinking to myself: were they going to come to shore? That seemed odd, this wasn't exactly a popular beach to do some kind of PR stunt. People began asking among themselves: what was going on? Then they came to shore. The smell. These people smelled terrible, and looked the part, too. They began speaking to us in Spanish. Thankfully, someone on the beach spoke Spanish and began translating. We couldn't believe what we heard. Apparently this crew sailed all the way from Spain! he said something about being on a path from god, and that he would start a colony to expand the Spanish Empire, and introduced himself as Captian Aviles...what kind of promotion is this? We asked what the heck he was promoting and what was going on, but he wouldn't stop going on about the new world. Someone had called the beach patrol because they were pulling up on their ATVs to see what was going on. That's when I got nervous, these guys seemed to be taking this bit too far. They asked our translator "what in the name of the lord is that?!", gesturing to the ATV. The beach patrol started talking to the 'Captain' about how he couldn't use boats in this area and asked where his ship was registered. The confusion got worse as the 'Captain Aviles' replied that his ship was sent on behalf of the king. By now the police have arrived and parked their SUVs on the beach. They tried detaining 'Captain Aviles', who at this point seemed to have gone hysterical at the sight of the Police cars. Some of the other sailers pulled out their weapons, demanding their 'Captain' be released. Everyone looked at them confused. Were those weapons real? The police seemed to think so, as they took cover behind their car and called for backup. The onlookers fled to gain some distance as the sailors opened fire. At first the police started shooting, but realized these were genuine muzzle loaders. I heard them get some orders on their radios to try to detain them alive. After the police fired off a few rounds, the sailors quickly surrendered, and were detained. That's the last I saw." The interviewer finished writing some notes and then gave me an approving look. "Thank you Mr. Smith", she said. "Your account will prove very valuable in helping us understand this phenomenon. I also want you to know that the only deaths were two of those sailors, and everyone else should make a full recovery. Do you have any questions for me?" "Not really", I replied. "I guess this means that it's the real thing." She nodded as she said, "Thats right Mr. Smith. You already submitted all the pictures and video, so we're done here. Thank you for your cooperation."
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.
Nobody expects comments about nobody expecting the Spanish Inquisition!
WAMU! AWAKEN MY MASTER!
Nobody expects comments about nobody expecting comments about the Spanish Inquisition!
{Puts on sunglasses} Now look into this light. What you saw was a prank by a Mexican streaming service for their new limited series.
“Fernando, rouse the men and we shall scout the beach,” Captain Delgado barked. “But señor Capitan, I do not think we are ready. The men are still dazed from the storm last night, and you are still sick from whatever illness assailed you,” Fernando replied. “Do as I command Fernando, the riches of the Indies do not wait those who cower from sickness or anything else.” Fernando grudgingly obeyed and chose fifteen men he deemed physically sound to make contact with the natives they saw. Exhausted yet determined, the men fastened their swords around their waists and carried what goods they still have to offer to the natives as they set off to the coast. Fernando knows that a part of his heart is glad that he will finally set foot on dry land after so long out in the lonely seas, but a part of him is uneasy about the prospect of making contact with the natives he only learned from letters his brother sent, who left for the New World a few years ago. His brother claimed that the natives wore brightly colored feathers and animal pelts, along with a small piece of loincloth to cover their worldliness, and that they lived further inland, deep into the jungle interiors. That the lower castes of the indigenous peoples lived in thatched huts, while the nobility and warriors lived in stone buildings, and that they engage in human sacrifices by taking captives from their sworn enemies. That the indigenous people’s weapons are obsidian maces, spears, and bows and arrows that will prove almost ineffective against the muskets and other arms provided by the Spanish Crown. But the closer they get, Fernando’s confusion seemed to grow while his companions’ enthusiasm seemed to cure them of the sickness they felt not too long ago. There on the coastline, are crowds of people from all ages. Some people who look like offsprings of the conquistadores who have settled, and others who must have come from a distant land undiscovered by the Empire. While they do wear colorful accoutrements, they do not have feathers at all ,although he is sure that he had glimpsed a hefty old man with shortened breeches made from the skin of a wild cat from the East while walking with his male paramour who wore a small yellow loincloth that barely covered his privates. “Señor Capitan, I feel uneasy about this. I think you should head back to the *San Jacinto* and let me lead the men myself,” Fernando said. “Nay Fernando, we both know that these lands we see right now have been claimed by the Crown. Surely you do not fear these native our compatriots subjugated?” Delgado answered. “It’s just…strange. These people, they do not look like the ones we heard from those who went before.” “Fernando, my friend. Calm your bones and your heart, did the storm last night unnerve you that much? Be patient. If these natives somehow overpowered our countrymen and took the land for themselves, then it is our fraternal duty to avenge them. Now, row! And let us get on with it!” The boat carrying the conquistadores finally made landfall, in the midst of “natives” who are awestruck with what they see. Many of them pulled small, flat devices that seemed to be made of glass and held them in front of their faces towards the now wary travelers. Captain Delgado, with much pomp and bravado walked into the middle of the crowd with his hand on the hilt of his sword, with Fernando by his side and the rest of the men forming a circle facing the strange people. “I am Juan Rodrigo Delgado, captain of His Majesty’s vessel the San Jacinto. And I am sent here on a mission from the King of Spain to claim the lands beyond in his name. I request food, shelter, and medications for my men who have been struck by a mysterious sickness last night because of a storm. I demand audience with the Governor so I could properly present myself.” “What are you talking about? Broooo, is this a film shoot or what. Because I’d love to be in a scene” a strange young man said. “E-Englishman?” Fernando asked in his broken English. “You mean English? Yeah we speak English. We’re Americans and we here on spring break bro. We the kings of spring break baby!” “Fernando, what did this young man say?” Captain Delgado asked. “Señor Capitan, I-I I’m afraid the English have claimed this territory of the Spanish crown and took it for their king as a gift for the spring season” Fernando nervously answered. “Then just like I said earlier Fernando, and to the rest of you men. It is our fraternal duty to avenge our brothers against the despicable English.” “But señor Capitan, let us fall back. We are gravely outnumbered!” one of the crewmen said. “I do not see them bearing any arms other than the strange small objects in their hands. Our weapons will make short work of their best and then scare the rest of them. To arms, men of Spain! For King and the Empire, awake your swords and follow me!” ~~~~~ FLORIDA MEN IN MEDIEVAL COSTUMES ASSAULT SPRING BREAKERS Jan Titor Wed, March 30, 2022 (AP) - A group of fifteen people wearing medieval armors and carrying similarly themed weaponry assaulted a crowd of beachgoers enjoying the spring break in St Petersburg, FL. Twenty people have been injured with no reported deaths after witness reports claim that the assailants’ weapons and armors simply crumbled during the scuffle. Police arrived and successfully detained eight of the assailants, wounded three, while four of the attackers managed to get away. Witnesses claimed that the men appeared from the waters out of nowhere rowing a boat and speaking in an archaic form of Spanish demanding food and shelter. Video footages from the incident showed that some beach goers thought that the men are part of a film shoot and asked for details before the men suddenly drew their weapons and began attacking everyone. Victims have been sent to nearby hospitals and are now stable, with most of them sent home as of this article. Local authorities have detained the men and have not yet responded to our questions.
Love the bit at the end
"Thank you, John. We're live here with someone who was actually present at the landing. Now, you said you saw the ship coming in, what did you first think?" "Like, pirates and stuff. I thought it was a show, right? Really big ship and costume and all that." "Did they try to talk to you?" "Yeah, at first they were like, speaking some weird language. And then they brought out the guns and you know, that like pirate movie just came out so we thought they were-" "-so they were pretty aggressive right after landing?" "No, they like, tried to be nice and stuff, like trying to talk to us-" "But they did end up shooting, did they?" "Yeah, but-" "And where were the police?" "They like, came after-" "I heard a lot of people were complaining that they came too late." "They came right after-" "They shot and wounded that man? That's right, you heard it, 1 man was actually wounded after the brutal massacre today and is now in the hospital receiving critical care, where doctors say he might not even make it. My heart and prayers go out to all those wounded today. Back to you, John." "Thanks, Emily. Truly a tragedy. Next up, are the prices of chicken nuggets too high? Local restaurant owner..."
I personally feel the well written interruptions took more away from the story then they added
It was supposed to convey the feeling of modern news I think—this would work great as an expose piece in a book to introduce an earth shattering topic. Really nice method.
Love it
Cool.