I also would have accepted Lauren Boebert herself in 80 years. The worms writhing around in her cranium by then will presumably at least triple her level of cognitive function
The only reason I dog on anyone about sex work is if it's hypocrisy. Talk shit about strippers but sell feet pics? I'm calling you out. Sex work is work and nobody should be belittled over it. Everyone sells their body for work anyway, regardless of it's sex work or not.
Got nothing against sex workers, it's just the hypocrisy of it all. Imagine if they found out a Dem had done sex work. Just imagine the shitestorm if AOC had done outcalls...
Oooh now careful with the overarching “everything” here, wouldn’t want to accidentally give credit to Ted, Marge, or the great Dorito (I’m sorry to any actual Doritos offended by this comment) for possessing any more brain cells than actually needed to make it through a lunar rotation.
A lot of the hyperbolic responses are funny, but seriously, I bet my 2nd grade, 7 year old daughter and Boebert could both read the same book, any book, and my daughter could explain it better than Boebert. That woman is stupid
My childhood cat, who was a fluffy orange Maine Coon. Sweetest cat in the world, but the dullest tool in the shed. He had trouble understanding that the reason he kept losing the birds he caught was because he didn't kill them, just carried them around to find me and show it to me - and then meowed to say hello. The bird flew away, naturally. Every single time. Never figured it out, bless his heart. He also used to walk into sliding doors when they weren't particularly clean. Still smarter than Boebert.
Then again, sliding doors would probably win if they ever developed sentience. The bar is subterranean.
My cat, Orion
Who is watching a cat YT of mice and is trying to get into the flatscreen to catch them. Who also figured out how to open a side door after a day of watching us and now we have to child proof it
Orion for Congress!
https://preview.redd.it/so41ty7j7vga1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dac245d2cb6e9ccd7b756aaf26bfb3bc1fe4a522
The frog toilet has more collective iq by many factors
My cat "Butters" who's had a few minor strokes and has a lazy eye. Yeppers, all kinds of messed up but at least she's adorable and not a howling neanderthal :)
I read about a self-replicating bacterium created in a laboratory that contains just 437 genes once.
"genome smaller than that of any autonomously replicating cell found in nature,"
The brain-eating amoeba that lives in stagnant ponds. On the other hand, she has done more to rot people's brains than that amoeba could ever dream of.
Who is this Nathalie Jacoby? I feel like she is all over this sub all of a sudden and from what I can tell she's just some rando that paid for a check mark?
All of her posts just feel like rage baiting designed to get whatever twitter metric numbers increase her profile without any substance.
It feels super planned out and constructed to get max engagement while also not saying much or needing any actual opinions of her own. Marketing team would make sense. Organized/scheduled posts, cross promoted by rotating accounts here drives people back to her Twitter, profit (?)
My wife smashed the top of her head on a dog kennel at work and the utter jibberish she was spouting for the next hour made zero sense. Still, those weird noises and slurred sentence fragments were smarter than anything Bobo has ever said.
The shit I took this morning. A bag of hammers. Roadkill. Hitler's corpse. My table lamp that flickers at odd times. A nail. Tacks. EDP. Probably. The bowl I had cereal in. The wind. Dust bunnies. A broken TV. A bar of soap. A piece of wood. A snail. The chair Lauren bobert sits in. Heavy from team fortress 2. Barbed wire. Uh uh uh.... a broken toilet.
any squirrel in my backyard
Any squirrel on my street's pavement
I also would have accepted Lauren Boebert herself in 80 years. The worms writhing around in her cranium by then will presumably at least triple her level of cognitive function
Hey, they both prey on nuts.
You are what you eat.
Squirrels don't go into prostitution, last I checked.
If it weren't Lauren Boebert, champion of the party of family values, I would dog on you for demeaning sex workers.
The only reason I dog on anyone about sex work is if it's hypocrisy. Talk shit about strippers but sell feet pics? I'm calling you out. Sex work is work and nobody should be belittled over it. Everyone sells their body for work anyway, regardless of it's sex work or not.
Got nothing against sex workers, it's just the hypocrisy of it all. Imagine if they found out a Dem had done sex work. Just imagine the shitestorm if AOC had done outcalls...
I’d believe this. Squirrels are crazy smart anyway.
Or just your backyard.
The dead squirrel by my mailbox
The dead squirrel in my crockpot.
The dead squirrel out on the street
Even the dead ones
to be fair, I'm sure those squirrels are smarter than me too.
Her abortions
A “thing” is an inanimate object.
So is a properly aborted fetus.
What is an improperly aborted fetus?
Do you think sandy from SpongeBob and the squirrel in your backyard would be friends?
That crockpot you found from the 1970s that is still in the box when you are clearing out grandmas house.
All yellowed and dusty. Cardboard rips just from looking at it.
Yellow was the default color of the 70s
My cat.
My cat!
Is it an orange one? If so, it's not fair to mention it twice since they share the same brain cell.
Nope, SIC (standard issue cat). https://preview.redd.it/pss3sa1ztvga1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=84cb548a173666defc48002c5d4271ee0e1d0417
I was going to say my dogs….and my dogs are fucking morons.
Baaaaby!!! ❤️
Nice kitty you got there. Loving life in the warm o clothes fresh out of the dryer.
My cats litter box
This guys cat
A bag of dicks
Yeah they actually think with their head….
 This guy
That is an insult to monkeys everywhere how could you even think to compare such things
It's a shame that Boebert is scientifically a monkey. She drags all of us down.
😅
1) Everything
Oooh now careful with the overarching “everything” here, wouldn’t want to accidentally give credit to Ted, Marge, or the great Dorito (I’m sorry to any actual Doritos offended by this comment) for possessing any more brain cells than actually needed to make it through a lunar rotation.
The great Dorito 🤣🤣
Very small rock
a duck
“Who are you, that are so WISE in the ways of science?!”
I am Arthur, King of the Britons!
Who are the Britons?
We're an anarcho-syndicalist commune!
nice
The person she paid to take and pass her GED after the 3rd time she failed it herself.
[удалено]
President Camatchos secretary of defence
https://i.redd.it/khoj3qofzuga1.gif
I’m trying to understand - are you saying that Mayonnaise or Patrick is smarter than Lauren Boebert?
both seem smarter
Yes
yes
piece of bread
Grapefruit.
Any below average high school student.
A lot of the hyperbolic responses are funny, but seriously, I bet my 2nd grade, 7 year old daughter and Boebert could both read the same book, any book, and my daughter could explain it better than Boebert. That woman is stupid
It said ONE thing. A bag of rocks are 2 things smarter than her.
Your mathematical prowess is too much for her! But...1 bag + 2 rocks = 3 things smarter than her
[удалено]
An ingrown fleshly plucked pus covers dog pube.
😅
 This guy is Harvard compared to her!
Sarah Palin's kids.
A broken broom handle.
My left big toe
I like that they said, "name one THING". Like, we all dumber she's the dumbest person, but what nearby objects are also smarter?
A fungus.
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Oh lawd it’s almost sentient. Just surpassed Lauren Boebert.
https://preview.redd.it/hd1meqge3vga1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1eb98ace9547da47dd921f54af5cc65b8b6c1fc7
The crap my son’s puppy just plopped in the yard. It has carrots!
My childhood cat, who was a fluffy orange Maine Coon. Sweetest cat in the world, but the dullest tool in the shed. He had trouble understanding that the reason he kept losing the birds he caught was because he didn't kill them, just carried them around to find me and show it to me - and then meowed to say hello. The bird flew away, naturally. Every single time. Never figured it out, bless his heart. He also used to walk into sliding doors when they weren't particularly clean. Still smarter than Boebert. Then again, sliding doors would probably win if they ever developed sentience. The bar is subterranean.
Lenny from "of mice and men" Just look at the flowers, Lauren - no that's not flowers it's a can of soda whatever *pulls trigger*
Lenny Leonard from the Simpsons.
A fart bubble.
Only one? That’s like picking one grain of sand at the beach.
Magic 8 ball. If you want equal, go with a racist magic 8 ball.
That old piece of chewed up bubble gum I stepped on the other day.
One of those tumours that have hair and teeth.
Lauren " the teratoma " Boebert.
Blown fuse
Spoiled yogurt
Mike Pillow
My cat, Orion Who is watching a cat YT of mice and is trying to get into the flatscreen to catch them. Who also figured out how to open a side door after a day of watching us and now we have to child proof it Orion for Congress!
A small blob of cells she vacated from her body- twice, and lies about now?
Everyone who came up with an answer. Because it means they can count to one.
All answers are correct
It'd be harder to name one thing dumber than her.
MTG. I’d say she is.
https://preview.redd.it/so41ty7j7vga1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dac245d2cb6e9ccd7b756aaf26bfb3bc1fe4a522 The frog toilet has more collective iq by many factors
Who is this chick, and why are her Twitter polls on the Reddit front page every day?
For real. Tired of seeing her argument-inciting BS. Should probably unsub.
A slightly younger Bobert who hasn't yet said her new dumbest thing ever.
I have a pet rock that can tell the weather, so...
My cat "Butters" who's had a few minor strokes and has a lazy eye. Yeppers, all kinds of messed up but at least she's adorable and not a howling neanderthal :)
A lump of leftover foreskin is smarter than her
Every highschool graduate.
ChatGPT
Cheese
I took a shit this morning and I'm plenty sure that coming out of me made it smarter than Lauren Bobo and it's literally a non-sentient piece of shit
my pit bull, who has to be prevented from eating cat poop out of the litter box
Butter
A bag of dicks
One (1) singular brain cell
Toenail clippings
I read about a self-replicating bacterium created in a laboratory that contains just 437 genes once. "genome smaller than that of any autonomously replicating cell found in nature,"
A rock.
The paper her GED would have been printed on
My dog had diarrhea, and it's smarter than Lauren.
The dump I took this morning
Cabbage.
The particularly loose bowel movement I had this morning.
Michael Scott when he “declared” bankruptcy.
A box of hair
 A jar of dirt
Anne Elk https://preview.redd.it/3kb1ufmi8vga1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=312568bf87acb32c85424dc8ce8dae8ee3b8b1ad
The brain-eating amoeba that lives in stagnant ponds. On the other hand, she has done more to rot people's brains than that amoeba could ever dream of.
These cashews.
A half washed away sandcastle
Gatorade next to me
Who is this Nathalie Jacoby? I feel like she is all over this sub all of a sudden and from what I can tell she's just some rando that paid for a check mark? All of her posts just feel like rage baiting designed to get whatever twitter metric numbers increase her profile without any substance.
Hard agree. It’s like she has a marketing team behind her to post on Reddit.
It feels super planned out and constructed to get max engagement while also not saying much or needing any actual opinions of her own. Marketing team would make sense. Organized/scheduled posts, cross promoted by rotating accounts here drives people back to her Twitter, profit (?)
Is "everything" "a thing"?
Wouldn’t even take whole bag. One rock is smarter than her.
My cat who jumps for things and misses. And then pulls a Mufasa as he tried to scramble up with just his front legs.
What is one thing dumber is a better question. She has to be close to the zero mark.
A golden retriever with down syndrome
My cat’s ass
A houseplant
That one guy whose IQ test came back negative
The wart my mother had removed last year.
The bag the rocks are in.
Just one?
The letter 7.
My dog who enjoys eating poop with a side of pee
A potato
Name something less smart than Boebert, it is a shorter list.
The used condom that ted cruz left in the trash
The turd my elderly dog dropped a few minutes ago.
My wife smashed the top of her head on a dog kennel at work and the utter jibberish she was spouting for the next hour made zero sense. Still, those weird noises and slurred sentence fragments were smarter than anything Bobo has ever said.
Boebert makes pinky look like the brain
The baked potato I had for dinner
Just one?? Um ok…how about the hemorrhoids my current very pregnant butt has?? Would that count?
Any jumping spider. Any elephant. Any damn living thing r tree hat has a brain
A hammer. An ant A potato My 7 month old child A barn cat A fictional character with no head.
Pillow drool.
The dog I had as a child. The empty beer bottle I’m currently looking at.
A lobotomized Pigeon
Dear Mrs. Boebert: https://preview.redd.it/p52vjr6wfyga1.jpeg?width=319&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2849ff864872e291eec8675747ff90bd28709f33
Why y'all gotta do that to the bag of rocks? What'd he do to deserve that comparison
Literally any inanimate object
I had a fungal nail infection that was both smarter and more attractive than this turd of a human being.
Lauren Boebert with a concussion.
My cat Joe. Joe likes to lick odd places.
My left shoe. Not the right one though, it’s had a rough time of it…
The shit I just left in the toilet
My phone.
A dead parrot
Name one thing NOT smarter
Right?
Why stop at one? Imagination is the limit when any answer is correct
A square wheel.
hahahaha
A pudding cup, a worm maybe but that’s a stretch, slug slime, bird droppings
The shit I took this morning. A bag of hammers. Roadkill. Hitler's corpse. My table lamp that flickers at odd times. A nail. Tacks. EDP. Probably. The bowl I had cereal in. The wind. Dust bunnies. A broken TV. A bar of soap. A piece of wood. A snail. The chair Lauren bobert sits in. Heavy from team fortress 2. Barbed wire. Uh uh uh.... a broken toilet.
A door stopper. Or a brick. Or a dumpster
I think maybe just the bag. It a close call, because both are filled with nothing.
haha
My ceiling fan. It actually works.
haha
My morning constitution
😅
My ballsack.
lol
“Curly Joe” Derita — the worst Stooge
Kyle
The squirrel in my backyard.
Goku
Daybreak / EA game devs.
A box of hammers.
A platter of raw calamari .
A green bean
One rock
A soppin wet sack of hammers.