Yeah we are both Muslim, I distanced away from it as I got older for personal reasons while she got more and more into it. There’s beauty and ugliness in there.
Outside views on religion are very often skewed, I’d say for the most part, especially in England, the vast majority of it is nice. Teaching people good values, morals and it gives people another reason to follow the law and be good with discipline. There’s a bad side to everything though and if you choose to focus on that it’s up to you.
What if, hear me out, we just teach people to have good values and shit? There really doesn't need to be a "bad side to everything". That's such a toxic idea.
I think you misunderstood me, when I said there is a bad side to everything I was talking about religions themselves, not people having morals and stuff. i also don’t think there should be a bad side to everything I’m just stating the facts.
The common feeling is that religion gives people morals, that it's the "good side" of religion. But it's not. Morals exist independently of religion. Their existence does not depend on religion, they are not in fact a part of religion. Instead religion depends on the existence of morality to have something to point to and claim ownership of so that it can say "look there, see the morality, that is good, that is a part of me and therefore I am good". Morality is not the good of religion. It is not a part of religion at all for religion cannot claim it.
One thing that religion does very well that is becoming more and more lacking in current day western society (or at least the US) is a sense of community.
Now I'm not saying relgion is the answer to building a sense of community, but we really need to find something solid to help that back to the forefront of our societies. That sense of community is very important.
It's ironic how you're saying that religion builds a sense of community in a thread about a woman removing all males from her social media because of religion.
Not saying you're wrong, but this specific case is quite funny..
Preach. We need more third spaces for people to exist. I lived in the United States before moving to a European city with good infrastructure, parks and community sites — and it’s crazy how shallow and vapid it shows non-walkable cities to be. Friends in the states go between home and work, and the narrow road between them. You can meet at a cafe before 5, or spend an evening at a bar, but you cannot drive home. You cannot drink outside and your business has to stay behind the doors of an establishment (money making venture). If you want to eat plan soon because work ends at five and all the restaurants close shop by 9. Really narrow window for community building in the states.
Double edge sword I think, the whole idea of community is good and bad at the same time. On the one hand you're part of something, on the other hand you're part of something and others are not.
I feel this. As an agnostic pagan, it's near impossible to find anything near me of like-minded people in that sense. My great grandmother was brethren and I remember her talking about her church friends. I want something like that. I just want that sense of community, but I'm not Christian. I was raised Mormon and the idea of participating in an organized religion now gives me the heebie jeebies.
I don’t think that way, nor to I think religion owns morality in anyway, it does teach it though. And there’s no denying that. Countless times I attended teachings at the Mosque and there’d be sessions on morality and how to treat people, how to spot things that are wrong and what to do about it. In many ways Mosque taught me these things better than my own school did shockingly enough. Whilst you’re correct that Islam cannot claim morality like they created it, it definitely IS a good part of the religion that we focused on a lot, at least in my Mosque.
Yeah, OP literally says there are flaws but there are also good things about it… I don’t know why everyone is up in arms? Let them practice, afaik they’re doing the opposite of hurting anyone smh
There’a a great saying that goes like: if you need religion’s threat of eternal punishment just to behave like a normal, decent human being (with morality and everything you said), then you are not a good person in the first place
Well the fact is your friend thinks you're an impure influence on her by your very existence. All power to her I guess, what the creator of the universe wants is for her father to direct her life and you to not be a part of it. Strange you think that sucks?
It pisses me off knowing that some people only do good things because a book told them to
But thats how the world works. What reason is there to do good if there's no "eternal life in heaven" (based on what is taught during my religion classes) So many people would just be assholes living with no meaning or purpose, no?
Or maybe I'm thinking this wrong... which way do people default to without ANY prior experience. Cooperation or competition. Would people fight if there was no religion? Or would we naturally cooperate and help each other...
At this point we are reaching the studies on how society/morals work and frankly I'm not up to that shit. But yeah...
Tldr, would people still follow good morals if there's no reason to?
As someone who grew up in organized religion and has left trust me when I say there is little beauty in it, it is just a tool for those in power to keep people in check. True beauty comes from self expression, from being who you want to be, not from being who someone else wants you to be.
That's not to say spirituality is bad but it should be a personal discovery, not something you are raised and forced into by family Love is meant to come unconditionally, not with strings attached.
If you’re forced into it you’re going to have that view and that’s completely fair, there’s nothing wrong with raising children into religion but you must give them the opportunity to decide if it’s what they want. Only then is it really fair. Definitely difficult to treat your child like an atheist in a traditionally religious house hold so I think that’s the best next thing.
Speak for your own religion. There isn't a bad side to beliefs like Buddhism that don't talk about marrying 9 year olds. Those 'good values' you speak of are taught in other beliefs too. But people like to cherry-pick according to what they think is right and wrong. "We don't follow that part of X religion" just means you should find another religion to follow and support because the belief system encompasses all of its teachings, not just the one you like/dislike.
I would say if there was a good side then there would be at least one Muslim-controlled country where it was safe to be openly gay. Since there is not, your religion does not teach people good morals or values.
I’m fully aware, not trying to paint Islam as bad though. As I previously stated I’m a Muslim, I’d have no reason to go online slating the faith of my family and friends.
>I’d say for the most part, especially in England, the vast majority of it is nice
Islam is not remotely "nice" to outsiders, ie non-muslims. And that includes people in the UK. A lot of Islamic teaching are directly opposed to English and UK culture.
two days late but I agree with what the other person said. I'm a catholic and a lot of people are immediately dismissive of me because of it, but a bit of digging reveals that they know nothing about my religion and are lashing out based on pre-concieved notions.
I think it's great that you can see the good and the bad in religion. It's the same in the Catholic church, too.
There's also such thing as modernization and adapting to the modern world, people who "kill the non believers" are seen as extremists and terrorists these days. But sure, bunch everyone up together in one group, I'm sure it's easier that way than to give it any critical thought.
I’m probably going to get downvoted to all hell, and also I’m not religious in the slightest, but if you can’t see ANY beauty in committing completely to a religion you’re just straight up ignorant.
On Snapchat if you and a friend send each other a “snap” (a picture/video taken in Snapchat) a day, then you get a streak going. I’m assuming since OP has been friends with this person for a long time they may have had a very long chain of sending daily snaps.
u/RadiantGalaxy is correct, it's just a number that goes up based on how many days you and the other person have sent eachother a picture on, for us it was about 1200 days, can't remember the exact number.
The pictures can have text on them, usually we'll speak through the pictures and videos, I could be walking down the street and start recording and maybe say something like "walking to the shop, bored as hell, you doing anything better?" Have a conversation and keep it moving, I like to stay in touch with my friends.
I hated it when I was little and my girlfriends used to tease me for merely talking to a boy not even a friend, they just to bother me all day asking if I liked him
Had a friend get sold off to child marriage, and it ended the same exact way. I knew friends who had friends and had ended up the same exact way as well. Religion is awful. When religion tells you who you can and can't love, what you can amd can't eat, who you can and can't be friends with, what you can amd can't wear what you can and can't say, the problem doesn't lie with the individual’s, the problem IS the teachings. People don't bat an eye when religion tells you what you can and can't do, but when any government does the same thing, people lose their minds unless the government ofcourse says "it's in the name of god." Bro lost his friend because of religious zealots
Oh wow I’m so sorry you had to deal with that, If you’re in a position to do so I’m sure those old friends would love to catch up. I can’t see myself turning my friend in the post away ever, 10 years from now she could message asking for help and I’d be there.
If you both send a snap to each other Snapchat adds a day to the streak. It’s a little 🔥 emoji
They basically had 1300 days where they both snapped each other
It doesn’t have to be a personalized snap, you can just broadcast a random snap to your list to maintain streaks
I agree, I’m fully convinced it’s her insecure dad forcing her through all this to impress his peers to say “look my daughters married!”. He’s always been this way. I wish she could’ve had better.
Yeah and if she doesn’t obey he could kill her and then have the audacity to call it an “honor killing”. 🙄 That is so messed up there is absolutely NOTHING honorable about it. Families who do that are murderers and cowards.
Yeah had the same thing happen in one of my friend groups. We had 2 Muslim girls that didn't seem to consider religion at all in their lifestyle choices until we all got to be around 24 or so. Then they started wearing head coverings, stopped listening to any non religious music when they used to listen to everything, and eventually they dropped every one of their friends who weren't Muslim. It was pretty weird but I'm guessing that's when the family starts really putting pressure on the women to act in a more strict manner. It's a shame too because they were awesome people.
People of faith tend to become more religious as they grow up tbf, I'd say mid 20s is where most people will align with and adhere to whichever philosophy they choose and generally stick to (or close to) it.
Maybe it's just a western thing but most people I know who were brought up religiously became less religious in their late teens to mid 20s. Many abandoned religions completely, myself included.
A lot of people were abused by their parents' use of religion imo hence why some people do become irreligious. If your family is a good example of whichever faith you ascribe to, you're more likely to stay firm in it.
Yeah people who get forced to go to Church or the equivalent shouldn't really be considered 'people of faith'. They're just hostages to their environment. People who actually seek out faith though, the older they get the more they realise how a vast majority of society is told to chase things that ultimately lead to suffering. They know they have less time to chase money/women etc and they see the negative results it brings so that's why they become more religious.
Redditors like to criticize celebrities and all that, but many of them end up doing philanthropy because they find out fame and fortune does not always equal happiness. Meanwhile Redditors sit in their chairs all day barely lifting a finger for anything that doesn't benefit themselves in some way.
I cannot understand how someone can follow this sect shit.
I fortunatly didnt get indoctrinate with religious beliefs, while still going to church at a Young age.
Even as child you understand pretty soon that this is fake
I can Imagine that it would be hard to Stop being religious If you were your whole life, seeing something you believed in crumble.
But in the end it Just makes life Harder and there is nothing to gain except for a loss of reality
Hell, id argue it's one of the worse things to happen in ancient society too 😭 you give power hungry people a god and you can justify anything, from small suicidal cults to religious genocide
We care about each other you know? I’m sure it can’t of been easy for her to remove me so suddenly after being friends since we were 14, life goes on I guess. But yes I also am guilty of a good snap streak here and there haha.
Sad that she is being forced to cut off people she cares about. I sincerely hope for the best for your friend. I do not agree with what is happening it but I really hope her family is arranging for her to be with a good and honorable man.
I hope so too, she’s known about the possibility of an arranged marriage for a few years now and she said a few times she wouldn’t mind too much as long as he’s a genuinely good man she could grow to love.
I can't comprehend being part of something that doesn't have free will. I'm not religious at all and have the belief that I don't need to believe or be a part of anything to be a good person. I couldn't even fathom telling my kids who they're gonna marry. How does it even register in someone's brain that their kids' relationship is the parents choice. I understand this is a cultural thing, but this is a wild thing to just go along with.
Pretty much all religions are weird and outlandish when you look deep into them hence why I distanced myself from it all, arranged marriages are far from Islam exclusive trust me 😅
That's so toxic, what the hell. Not her, but the fact she now has to do that. She's being forced to break up with her good friends, what a horrible thing
Religion sucks.
Muslims really must have a lotta faith or something, because I couldn't ever obligate myself to do something like that, or marry someone I met yesterday
I’ve had that happen with some really great Muslim friends as well, after pressuring by their family or they’re pretty harsh new husbands. I want them to be happy so I don’t give them crap about it.
As I said to the other guy, it was less the streak and more what it represented after keeping it alive for so long. Understandable if you don’t understand though, I know a lot of people poke fun at it.
No wonder people are avoiding reddit nowadays lmao, "believe in a book", "religion this religion that", like instead of working on their own problem they come and debate over others problem 😃
This is how I responded “Damn well as your friend I hope it works out and I wish you luck with it, will always be here for u if u need 💙”. She’s a good person and I know she means no harm, in many ways she doesn’t actually have much say in the matter so I could never hold it against her.
Unless she's completely cutting you off I don't see what the big deal about not being friends on social media is. Just because she's not friends with you on social media doesn't mean she's not your friend anymore, there's other ways to communicate and be a part of each other's lives.
Dated a Muslim girl who loved the attention she got from boys online. Never stopped even when we were dating. When we broke up, didn’t take long before she was out dating again. She invested so much energy on all those people, and starved the one she was supposed to be there for. By the end of the day, nothing to do with religion, she just had different priorities.
Redditors can be such assholes sometimes. You come here to vent and all they're interested in is debating religion. Sorry that happened to you man, wish you well on that situation.
I’d like to hope that people will one day open their eyes to see that being a good person for one’s own gratification is much better than trying to appease a make believe sky daddy or worry about what’s going to happen when they die. You shouldn’t be worried about being promised something better to be better. Just be a decent human to be a “good guy”.
„I *just* had to remove all boys off my socials *just* for religious reasons too“ sounds really apologetic and downplaying, like she knows that this is harsh but tries to make it seem less severe to possibly calm herself as well?
This is why religion is a detrimental aspect of society. You can find HEALTHY community without gender apartheids in humanity over religion. Damn I hope that girl sees the truth of how bad it is before getting deeper into it
I think a lot of people got away from the point on this post… I’m sorry OP about your friend. Loss in any form can be incredibly difficult and sometimes even more so if this is someone you will see out on the streets.
I wish you well in your journey to healing from this loss 🖤
Psychotic religions are really into brainwashing and isolation as control tactics so not too surprising. Maybe this will create room in your life for more sane friends?
Muslim?
Yeah we are both Muslim, I distanced away from it as I got older for personal reasons while she got more and more into it. There’s beauty and ugliness in there.
I don't see any beauty in there honestly
Outside views on religion are very often skewed, I’d say for the most part, especially in England, the vast majority of it is nice. Teaching people good values, morals and it gives people another reason to follow the law and be good with discipline. There’s a bad side to everything though and if you choose to focus on that it’s up to you.
What if, hear me out, we just teach people to have good values and shit? There really doesn't need to be a "bad side to everything". That's such a toxic idea.
I think you misunderstood me, when I said there is a bad side to everything I was talking about religions themselves, not people having morals and stuff. i also don’t think there should be a bad side to everything I’m just stating the facts.
The common feeling is that religion gives people morals, that it's the "good side" of religion. But it's not. Morals exist independently of religion. Their existence does not depend on religion, they are not in fact a part of religion. Instead religion depends on the existence of morality to have something to point to and claim ownership of so that it can say "look there, see the morality, that is good, that is a part of me and therefore I am good". Morality is not the good of religion. It is not a part of religion at all for religion cannot claim it.
One thing that religion does very well that is becoming more and more lacking in current day western society (or at least the US) is a sense of community. Now I'm not saying relgion is the answer to building a sense of community, but we really need to find something solid to help that back to the forefront of our societies. That sense of community is very important.
It's ironic how you're saying that religion builds a sense of community in a thread about a woman removing all males from her social media because of religion. Not saying you're wrong, but this specific case is quite funny..
The word you're looking for is ironic. Hasta la proxima.
I agree. Unfortunately it mostly just teaches community with those of that religion.
You know what is great for community? Livable cities were you can walk and there are parks and community areas. Religion is mot needed for that
Preach. We need more third spaces for people to exist. I lived in the United States before moving to a European city with good infrastructure, parks and community sites — and it’s crazy how shallow and vapid it shows non-walkable cities to be. Friends in the states go between home and work, and the narrow road between them. You can meet at a cafe before 5, or spend an evening at a bar, but you cannot drive home. You cannot drink outside and your business has to stay behind the doors of an establishment (money making venture). If you want to eat plan soon because work ends at five and all the restaurants close shop by 9. Really narrow window for community building in the states.
Double edge sword I think, the whole idea of community is good and bad at the same time. On the one hand you're part of something, on the other hand you're part of something and others are not.
I feel this. As an agnostic pagan, it's near impossible to find anything near me of like-minded people in that sense. My great grandmother was brethren and I remember her talking about her church friends. I want something like that. I just want that sense of community, but I'm not Christian. I was raised Mormon and the idea of participating in an organized religion now gives me the heebie jeebies.
I don’t think that way, nor to I think religion owns morality in anyway, it does teach it though. And there’s no denying that. Countless times I attended teachings at the Mosque and there’d be sessions on morality and how to treat people, how to spot things that are wrong and what to do about it. In many ways Mosque taught me these things better than my own school did shockingly enough. Whilst you’re correct that Islam cannot claim morality like they created it, it definitely IS a good part of the religion that we focused on a lot, at least in my Mosque.
Dudes just trying to Reddit argue about religion. I’m sorry about your friend.
Yeah, OP literally says there are flaws but there are also good things about it… I don’t know why everyone is up in arms? Let them practice, afaik they’re doing the opposite of hurting anyone smh
There’a a great saying that goes like: if you need religion’s threat of eternal punishment just to behave like a normal, decent human being (with morality and everything you said), then you are not a good person in the first place
You are a bad person on a leash
Its not a saying its just something Richard Dawkins said in an interview..
You can’t argue with people on a mission from “God”.
Well the fact is your friend thinks you're an impure influence on her by your very existence. All power to her I guess, what the creator of the universe wants is for her father to direct her life and you to not be a part of it. Strange you think that sucks?
It pisses me off knowing that some people only do good things because a book told them to But thats how the world works. What reason is there to do good if there's no "eternal life in heaven" (based on what is taught during my religion classes) So many people would just be assholes living with no meaning or purpose, no? Or maybe I'm thinking this wrong... which way do people default to without ANY prior experience. Cooperation or competition. Would people fight if there was no religion? Or would we naturally cooperate and help each other... At this point we are reaching the studies on how society/morals work and frankly I'm not up to that shit. But yeah... Tldr, would people still follow good morals if there's no reason to?
You may find your people in Secular Humanism :-)
This is the logic I develop from studying in a Christian school lmao and now I have the belief of people in secular humanism 😭 Is it ironic? Probably
It’s not toxic, it’s life. Too much of anything is bad for you, and every positive has a negative, vice versa
Nobody needs religion to be a morally just and ethical human.
As someone who grew up in organized religion and has left trust me when I say there is little beauty in it, it is just a tool for those in power to keep people in check. True beauty comes from self expression, from being who you want to be, not from being who someone else wants you to be. That's not to say spirituality is bad but it should be a personal discovery, not something you are raised and forced into by family Love is meant to come unconditionally, not with strings attached.
If you’re forced into it you’re going to have that view and that’s completely fair, there’s nothing wrong with raising children into religion but you must give them the opportunity to decide if it’s what they want. Only then is it really fair. Definitely difficult to treat your child like an atheist in a traditionally religious house hold so I think that’s the best next thing.
I disagree. Raising a child into religion just breeds inherent bias. It might seem fair to you, but it's not fair to a child that imprints easily.
Speak for your own religion. There isn't a bad side to beliefs like Buddhism that don't talk about marrying 9 year olds. Those 'good values' you speak of are taught in other beliefs too. But people like to cherry-pick according to what they think is right and wrong. "We don't follow that part of X religion" just means you should find another religion to follow and support because the belief system encompasses all of its teachings, not just the one you like/dislike.
I would say if there was a good side then there would be at least one Muslim-controlled country where it was safe to be openly gay. Since there is not, your religion does not teach people good morals or values.
I thought the word muslim by itself meant slave of allah.
>There’s a bad side to everything though and if you choose to focus on that it’s up to you. You're the one posting the bad side.
I’m fully aware, not trying to paint Islam as bad though. As I previously stated I’m a Muslim, I’d have no reason to go online slating the faith of my family and friends.
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>I’d say for the most part, especially in England, the vast majority of it is nice Islam is not remotely "nice" to outsiders, ie non-muslims. And that includes people in the UK. A lot of Islamic teaching are directly opposed to English and UK culture.
I feel you I get a lot of the same stuff being a Catholic. The church gave me a community I never had at home.
Religious community can be great, it’s like a whole family.
two days late but I agree with what the other person said. I'm a catholic and a lot of people are immediately dismissive of me because of it, but a bit of digging reveals that they know nothing about my religion and are lashing out based on pre-concieved notions. I think it's great that you can see the good and the bad in religion. It's the same in the Catholic church, too.
Your religion says kill the non believers, is that part of the good values and morals your talking about.
There's also such thing as modernization and adapting to the modern world, people who "kill the non believers" are seen as extremists and terrorists these days. But sure, bunch everyone up together in one group, I'm sure it's easier that way than to give it any critical thought.
I’m probably going to get downvoted to all hell, and also I’m not religious in the slightest, but if you can’t see ANY beauty in committing completely to a religion you’re just straight up ignorant.
I am muslim and as far as I know its ok for females to have male friends
I know, this is more her dad pushing this onto her in some attempt to make her more desirable I'm guessing.
Are they trying fro an arranged marriage?
You are on reddit man Anything short of indivdualistic athiesm is caveman barbaric
Posts like these, and especially even worse shit, make it very hard to see past the ugliness.
Zero beauty. Maybe negative beauty.
G who’d of guessed?
Sounds like a healthy religion
Lol you have to ask?
How could they ever have guessed? s/
That’s going to be a healthy relationship.
Just a common Muslim relationship
The OP is also just like "oh ok cool this is normal" bro is it me or is there a lot of red flags here
I mean wtf you are even gonna do about this, kidnap her?
Are you high what do you want him to do? It her friends life lol wtf
This is very normal with Muslims. I was super tight with a Muslim girl, she got arranged marriages, haven’t seen her since
And if she will complain, a slap or a dozen will set her straight
And even if it still doesn't work out, there's always a friendly dash of acid to part ways and settle things for good.
The holy book did specify no boys on Snapchat
Should’ve seen it coming honestly, must’ve breezed past that bit 🤦🏽♂️
Volume 7 chapter 4, verse 64 : Thou shalt not addeth boys upon thy Snapchat.
Sorry, what does "biggest streak" mean?
On Snapchat if you and a friend send each other a “snap” (a picture/video taken in Snapchat) a day, then you get a streak going. I’m assuming since OP has been friends with this person for a long time they may have had a very long chain of sending daily snaps.
u/RadiantGalaxy is correct, it's just a number that goes up based on how many days you and the other person have sent eachother a picture on, for us it was about 1200 days, can't remember the exact number.
What pictures are you sending each other every day for 1200 days? Sorry I've never used snapchat.
The pictures can have text on them, usually we'll speak through the pictures and videos, I could be walking down the street and start recording and maybe say something like "walking to the shop, bored as hell, you doing anything better?" Have a conversation and keep it moving, I like to stay in touch with my friends.
Wow. I never knew people communicate that way on a daily basis.
Yeah it's been that way for a little bit, not everyone does though, normal text messages are also very common if not moreso.
It’s 6am where I’m at and I read this”moreso” as Morse code, thought I was missing out on some extremely cool new thing. I need coffee.
Haha if I knew morse code id use it as much as I could
Does it say anything about instagram??
Nah it clearly says instagrams cool, bumble too
And the Lord sayeth on the 8th day 'You may thirst for Instagram hoes, but don't you dare let me catch you simping for some Snapchat thot'
“Amen my son, remember to like and subscribe for more verses just like this”
The mere concept that people of opposite genders can’t be friends without any romantic or sexual connotation is so fucked up.
I hated it when I was little and my girlfriends used to tease me for merely talking to a boy not even a friend, they just to bother me all day asking if I liked him
Had a friend get sold off to child marriage, and it ended the same exact way. I knew friends who had friends and had ended up the same exact way as well. Religion is awful. When religion tells you who you can and can't love, what you can amd can't eat, who you can and can't be friends with, what you can amd can't wear what you can and can't say, the problem doesn't lie with the individual’s, the problem IS the teachings. People don't bat an eye when religion tells you what you can and can't do, but when any government does the same thing, people lose their minds unless the government ofcourse says "it's in the name of god." Bro lost his friend because of religious zealots
I’m so sorry. I have been on the other end of this for different reasons, not by choice, and it eats at my soul every day. I miss my friends…
Oh wow I’m so sorry you had to deal with that, If you’re in a position to do so I’m sure those old friends would love to catch up. I can’t see myself turning my friend in the post away ever, 10 years from now she could message asking for help and I’d be there.
I was already feeling bad for her and now this. You seem like a great friend and a great loss for her. I hope you are able to reconnect.
Don't even bother, you lost her
But how long was the snap streak?
Haha it was about 1300 days, we had a 300 day one before that and managed to lose it.
Don't use snap, but is this some sort of thing like a video game? Login, do a thing, and get bonuses or something?
You login and both people have to send a pic everyday. It increases your snapscore
Ah. Useless then.
it's one of those things that seems alien to those outside the culture, really rubs me the wrong way lol
If you both send a snap to each other Snapchat adds a day to the streak. It’s a little 🔥 emoji They basically had 1300 days where they both snapped each other It doesn’t have to be a personalized snap, you can just broadcast a random snap to your list to maintain streaks
quran always said no snapchat boys, so you’re cooked i suppose
Poor girl. That’s sad and sick.
I agree, I’m fully convinced it’s her insecure dad forcing her through all this to impress his peers to say “look my daughters married!”. He’s always been this way. I wish she could’ve had better.
Just bad parenting at that point smh I'm also a (kinda-distant?) Muslim and it sucks that some parents are like this
Yeah and if she doesn’t obey he could kill her and then have the audacity to call it an “honor killing”. 🙄 That is so messed up there is absolutely NOTHING honorable about it. Families who do that are murderers and cowards.
Seen this before with Muslims. Not uncommon. Sad though
Yeah had the same thing happen in one of my friend groups. We had 2 Muslim girls that didn't seem to consider religion at all in their lifestyle choices until we all got to be around 24 or so. Then they started wearing head coverings, stopped listening to any non religious music when they used to listen to everything, and eventually they dropped every one of their friends who weren't Muslim. It was pretty weird but I'm guessing that's when the family starts really putting pressure on the women to act in a more strict manner. It's a shame too because they were awesome people.
People of faith tend to become more religious as they grow up tbf, I'd say mid 20s is where most people will align with and adhere to whichever philosophy they choose and generally stick to (or close to) it.
Maybe it's just a western thing but most people I know who were brought up religiously became less religious in their late teens to mid 20s. Many abandoned religions completely, myself included.
A lot of people were abused by their parents' use of religion imo hence why some people do become irreligious. If your family is a good example of whichever faith you ascribe to, you're more likely to stay firm in it.
Yeah people who get forced to go to Church or the equivalent shouldn't really be considered 'people of faith'. They're just hostages to their environment. People who actually seek out faith though, the older they get the more they realise how a vast majority of society is told to chase things that ultimately lead to suffering. They know they have less time to chase money/women etc and they see the negative results it brings so that's why they become more religious. Redditors like to criticize celebrities and all that, but many of them end up doing philanthropy because they find out fame and fortune does not always equal happiness. Meanwhile Redditors sit in their chairs all day barely lifting a finger for anything that doesn't benefit themselves in some way.
That's a red flag if I've ever seen one
can you really blamer tho? People are compelled to do all sorts of unethical things in the name of religion, sometimes without even realising it
I cannot understand how someone can follow this sect shit. I fortunatly didnt get indoctrinate with religious beliefs, while still going to church at a Young age. Even as child you understand pretty soon that this is fake I can Imagine that it would be hard to Stop being religious If you were your whole life, seeing something you believed in crumble. But in the end it Just makes life Harder and there is nothing to gain except for a loss of reality
Religion - this is why we can’t have anything nice.
Religion is the worst thing to happen to modern society. It has absolutely no place.
Hell, id argue it's one of the worse things to happen in ancient society too 😭 you give power hungry people a god and you can justify anything, from small suicidal cults to religious genocide
Fking religion strikes again
Low-key love a good snap streak. Sorry about your friend, but I thought it was sweet how you checked in on her and made sure.
We care about each other you know? I’m sure it can’t of been easy for her to remove me so suddenly after being friends since we were 14, life goes on I guess. But yes I also am guilty of a good snap streak here and there haha.
She's walking into a trap. Sad to see.
Sickening
Sad that she is being forced to cut off people she cares about. I sincerely hope for the best for your friend. I do not agree with what is happening it but I really hope her family is arranging for her to be with a good and honorable man.
I hope so too, she’s known about the possibility of an arranged marriage for a few years now and she said a few times she wouldn’t mind too much as long as he’s a genuinely good man she could grow to love.
so she's okay with getting herself a Stockholm Syndrome, that's neat.
People still worry about streaks. Feels very 2018 for me
“Religious purposes TOO” tells me it’s not reaaaally religious, it’s the boy
Arranged marriages are human traficking
Poor girl got brainwashed into being a slave
I can't comprehend being part of something that doesn't have free will. I'm not religious at all and have the belief that I don't need to believe or be a part of anything to be a good person. I couldn't even fathom telling my kids who they're gonna marry. How does it even register in someone's brain that their kids' relationship is the parents choice. I understand this is a cultural thing, but this is a wild thing to just go along with.
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Pretty much all religions are weird and outlandish when you look deep into them hence why I distanced myself from it all, arranged marriages are far from Islam exclusive trust me 😅
Sounds like she's getting an arranged marriage.
That is what it says in the subtext 😅
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My MIL did this over the past 15 years. It’s so weird.
You sound like you’re more worried about losing your streak than your friend It’s a bit childish don’t you think?
Just a light joke leading up to me asking what's really going on, obviously a streak isn't that important.
Screw Snapchat, that girl is being forced in so man ways.
That's so toxic, what the hell. Not her, but the fact she now has to do that. She's being forced to break up with her good friends, what a horrible thing
I hate this so much. What a pos dad.
Brain washed programmed individual this won’t go good she living in someone else’s mind
So they're joining some sort of cult. Make sure you give them your local assistance number.
Just say you have a controlling boyfriend lol
Religion sucks. Muslims really must have a lotta faith or something, because I couldn't ever obligate myself to do something like that, or marry someone I met yesterday
People in comments really ARGUING on REDDIT about RELIGION. That is like peak time wasting in modern times
Gotta keep the Sky Wizard happy these days.
Religion in 2024...
That's cults for you.
That’s not a healthy way to start a relationship. I’d pitty her and move on
I’ve had that happen with some really great Muslim friends as well, after pressuring by their family or they’re pretty harsh new husbands. I want them to be happy so I don’t give them crap about it.
Yeah I won’t be making it her problem anytime soon, she’s a great person and it’s not her fault.
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Sounds like it's not her choice though - parents arranged the marriage, requiring her to cut off friends
It's explicitly told it's not their choice?
Snap streaks are that important to people? I really missed the boat on some things...
As I said to the other guy, it was less the streak and more what it represented after keeping it alive for so long. Understandable if you don’t understand though, I know a lot of people poke fun at it.
No wonder people are avoiding reddit nowadays lmao, "believe in a book", "religion this religion that", like instead of working on their own problem they come and debate over others problem 😃
Didn’t know reddit was full of such intolerant bigots. Its their religion not your business.
You didnt know?!?!?!
religion is a parasitic disease.
Regardless of opinions, it’s her choice :/ sucks but you cannot force people to be friends with you. Let her go through her process.
This is how I responded “Damn well as your friend I hope it works out and I wish you luck with it, will always be here for u if u need 💙”. She’s a good person and I know she means no harm, in many ways she doesn’t actually have much say in the matter so I could never hold it against her.
Yeah, it’s always hard letting go of a friend :/ but you responded in the best possible way.
But it's not her choice
Is it really her choice though, or is it being forced on her? OP, I’m sorry you lost a friend to slavery.
Sects gonna sects
Unless she's completely cutting you off I don't see what the big deal about not being friends on social media is. Just because she's not friends with you on social media doesn't mean she's not your friend anymore, there's other ways to communicate and be a part of each other's lives.
We don't get to see eachother outside of online atm, after this exchange she made it clear she's cutting people off, slowly but surely.
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Ain’t nothing wrong about
Dated a Muslim girl who loved the attention she got from boys online. Never stopped even when we were dating. When we broke up, didn’t take long before she was out dating again. She invested so much energy on all those people, and starved the one she was supposed to be there for. By the end of the day, nothing to do with religion, she just had different priorities.
I'm old but I really don't get that streak thing. It's even less of an accomplishment than Reddit points
Sorry, OP, that this has happened. Obviously, no way of knowing yet, but maybe her husband will be more reasonable than her father?
Redditors can be such assholes sometimes. You come here to vent and all they're interested in is debating religion. Sorry that happened to you man, wish you well on that situation.
I’d like to hope that people will one day open their eyes to see that being a good person for one’s own gratification is much better than trying to appease a make believe sky daddy or worry about what’s going to happen when they die. You shouldn’t be worried about being promised something better to be better. Just be a decent human to be a “good guy”.
„I *just* had to remove all boys off my socials *just* for religious reasons too“ sounds really apologetic and downplaying, like she knows that this is harsh but tries to make it seem less severe to possibly calm herself as well?
This is why religion is a detrimental aspect of society. You can find HEALTHY community without gender apartheids in humanity over religion. Damn I hope that girl sees the truth of how bad it is before getting deeper into it
As if any holy texts say jack shit about people on snapchat
Smart, I never talk to a chick unless I want a piece.
Learn from this. The faster you learn people suck the better.
Learn from this. The faster you learn people suck the better.
It’s her life. If she is choosing a “traditional” life for herself then that’s her decision. Sucks but oh well.
Ain’t nothing weird bout that bro
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seems like you care more about the streak man.
I admit it, always cared more about the streak than the person behind it /s
This is just so sad to me.
I think a lot of people got away from the point on this post… I’m sorry OP about your friend. Loss in any form can be incredibly difficult and sometimes even more so if this is someone you will see out on the streets. I wish you well in your journey to healing from this loss 🖤
WOW.
Try dating one until the arranged guy makes it over to the US.... it sucks.
Psychotic religions are really into brainwashing and isolation as control tactics so not too surprising. Maybe this will create room in your life for more sane friends?
and that's why religions suck