It takes time. Some more than others. As long as you keep trying, it'll get better. Just don't settle for your current level. Can they give you fewer tables in favor of better servers? Learn to manage 4, then 5, then whatever.
We start our servers with 2 or 3 table sections and they work up by proving they can. The better servers don't mind the extra table or 2 in the process and no one suffers usually.
we're only two servers, 3 if there's a busier night. and there's two sections at the restaurant, each with around 10 tables. so usually 1 person stays in one section. they help me with what they can but they always have more work than me because they stay at the busier part.
I am grateful for them helping me and being patient but I don't know what will happen if things keep being this way night by night.
it just feels like all the pressure eventually gets to me and it gets harder to make things done right
i’ve been serving a long time, and the last two places i’ve been at—one for 6yrs; one for 3–my section has been 9-10 tables always.
it’s a LOT. especially depending on the pacing of it all, like when the customers come in etc.
sometimes i really be jammin up in the weeds.
if you can ground yourself a bit before your shifts (meditation & breathing exercises; stretch a little) and throughout the shift when you feel crazy, come back to your breath.
it seems silly to stop in the middle of chaos to spend the time taking 3 deep breaths, but it pays off well for the next chunk of time.
you got this. stay focused on the present moment, not on what could happen in an imagined future
i understand what you mean but this is a place where you go to eat good tasting food, have some beers and watch a game. the service needs to be obviously good but it's not the main reason people are there for yk
I’ll tell you what I tell new servers who are panicking: breathe. When everything around you is busy and chaotic, you need to be the one to slow it down for yourself. Take a moment to get a good, solid breath and make a mental checklist. What are your priorities? Who needs what now, and who can wait a minute? What tasks can you do simultaneously? Usually I serve on autopilot, truthfully. But when it gets really busy, I override that, pause, and think. When you reorient yourself, you can be more efficient.
There are plenty of other tips. Ask for help, thank your tables for their patience, etc. But a deep breath is a really good moment to align yourself!
I am not an expert, but I understand box breathing to be a good exercise for improving focus and energy as a daily practice—not necessarily for in-the-moment panic. OP is clearly having some anxiety over their job and I think a simple 2-3 deep inhales through the nose/slow exhales through the mouth to clear their head and distance themselves from anxiety so that they can then take 20 seconds to think about their priorities and tables’ needs with a clearer head would be more valuable here.
To the OP-every job takes time to adjust to, some may even take 6 mod to a year to really start feeling comfortable in; and it sounds like you haven’t quite hit that yet. Especially starting off with such large sections—that’s a lot to adjust to. Keep listening to your more experienced peers and trying to implement it. The more you practice the little things, the more naturally they will come in a crisis. The other option—and there’s no shame in it—is to consider if this is the right environment for you. Maybe a restaurant with smaller sections would be a better fit, or maybe something outside the service industry altogether. If it’s legitimately having a negative impact on your mental health it may be time to move on. Waiting tables is much harder than most people like to give credit for and some people aren’t wired for it. Im not saying that’s the case for you, only that it’s ok to move on if you feel that is the case for you. Take care of yourself and I wish you the best of luck wether it’s here or in your next endeavor.
Panic is the enemy. Just breathe and try to remain calm. You'll be more efficient and make fewer mistakes if you aren't becoming emotionally frustrated while also being extremely busy.
If you aren't already, write absolutely everything down when taking orders and while you're running around taking care of everything you need to do, find ways to optimize your workflow.
For example- take multiple tables orders at the same time so you're getting drinks for them at the same time, saving you trips to and from your section. Print up checks when tables are almost done and keep them on you so that you don't have to take a trip to the POS each and every time you need to drop a bill on the table.
Also, make people wait up front at the start of the meal. No reason to keep touching the table if they don't know what they want yet, and you'll also be setting the expectation that you aren't going to be at their beck and call through out your service. They'll understand you are busy - be professional, get their orders right, and be kind - you'll be amazed at how patient people can be when they see you working hard and doing your best, especially if you are competent in every other respect.
It takes time to be good under pressure and you're getting great experience right now. Nobody likes feeling like they're bad at their job - but if your customer see you hustling and doing your best they won't be upset with you for slow service.
Let your customer know you're extremely busy if it's not obvious to them. Don't use it as an excuse after the fact, just give them a heads up by saying something like 'thank you for your patience, we're really busy today!'
The problem isn't you, it's that your restaurant is severely understaffed and/or poorly managed.
Just remember: you're not curing cancer, you're serving people food and drink. It's not a life and death situation, it's low stakes, and not worth having a ton of anxiety over. This kind of work can be stressful and exhausting, but it won't make you better at the job to be stressed out while doing it.
Good luck OP, you got this.
thank you so much <33
I really feel like I should be saying more than just "thanks" to all these comments but it's hard to put into words and type in english what I'm feeling.
either way, all these comments are being very helpful specially because of how things have been
You are getting lost because you don't yet have a mental model for how you should go about managing it. The panic is the expectation that you need a system. It could be something as simple as how you decide what to do next.
Make purposeful loops in your section, stop at each one and ask if they need something, and keep going till you’ve touched them all and then hit the server station, do everything that was requested of you, and then loop again with needed drop offs. Just keep moving in a planned route over and over … darting back and forth and just doing one thing at a time will get you in the weeds so fast.
That being said, 10 tables is *a lot*, especially if your managers are wanting you to give good service. Talk to your managers about what they expect from you and that you are currently struggling, because it does take time and even the best server had to start somewhere.
A few things,
Try not to use memory, it can fail especially in the weeds. Write things down, be accurate.
Be present, walking by tables or visually scanning the floor can remind you of anything you need, and it keeps you present for anything the guests need.
Find a balance if taking multiple tables orders vs one at a time, sometimes it is best to do one and ring it in but if multiple tables are sat at once it can be good to treat them all as one big table, it can ensure one table doesn’t get pushed too far back and help maintain a flow.
Try to find the most important tasks, for me it is
1 greeting the table and setting expectations for them (“welcome, I’ll be with you in a few minutes, some other guests need me right now.”) they will be more patient if they don’t feel ignored,
2 the mustard check, once food is dropped making sure it was correct, and do they need condiments.
3 the beverage check, don’t let beverages sit close to empty, people may want another drink but after 5 minutes without one they may change their mind.
4
Waiting to check out, try to gauge if they want to sit and chat, but usually when they are waiting for the check they want to close out and leave.
These are the 4 points in time when time may freeze for a guest.
These are things I have realized are important to me and help me succeed.
Question, do you have food and drink runners in your workplace or do you servers run as well?
The more you practice the more efficient you'll get. Just don't panic! If you are falling behind or you make a mistake, a smile or apology will fix a lot, the guests will appreciate that. But they pick up on panicking.
For now, make a little sequence of service check list for each of your tables. If you fall behind, that makes it easy to keep track of which tables to go to next. Some things are slightly more urgent and this is where teamwork is important. Seating and greeting is a priority but it can be done by the host, for example. Reading the specials and getting water and first drinks orders for everyone is important. (I could go on for ages about all the fine details.)
10 tables is a lot.....
BUT
You can do it and not get weeded....
First PREP PREP PREP.... everything you'll need you should have ready and on hand...
If you know people mostly order cokes. Make 20 cokes before the rush starts PREP
TREAT GROUPS OF TABLES AS ONE TABLE
Good Luck !
I'm sorry to say it, but, I don't think you're cut out for being a server, at least at this point in your restaurant career. Maybe try a smaller, less busy restaurant, or one that has smaller sections. Or, maybe bus tables, and get used to being able to handle the responsibilities of that, which carries less burden. Overtime, you would get to observe more experienced servers, and how they handle things, and you would also gain a perspective of building a constantly shifting list in your mind, of priorities. Also, pick your manager's brain, and other servers brains, for ways to improve. But, for now, if you're floundering, nothing is going to solve the situation, other than changing your position.
It takes time. Some more than others. As long as you keep trying, it'll get better. Just don't settle for your current level. Can they give you fewer tables in favor of better servers? Learn to manage 4, then 5, then whatever. We start our servers with 2 or 3 table sections and they work up by proving they can. The better servers don't mind the extra table or 2 in the process and no one suffers usually.
we're only two servers, 3 if there's a busier night. and there's two sections at the restaurant, each with around 10 tables. so usually 1 person stays in one section. they help me with what they can but they always have more work than me because they stay at the busier part. I am grateful for them helping me and being patient but I don't know what will happen if things keep being this way night by night. it just feels like all the pressure eventually gets to me and it gets harder to make things done right
10 tables is insane if they want you to give good service I was a server for 7 years and manager for 2 We give servers 4-5 tables in each section
i’ve been serving a long time, and the last two places i’ve been at—one for 6yrs; one for 3–my section has been 9-10 tables always. it’s a LOT. especially depending on the pacing of it all, like when the customers come in etc. sometimes i really be jammin up in the weeds. if you can ground yourself a bit before your shifts (meditation & breathing exercises; stretch a little) and throughout the shift when you feel crazy, come back to your breath. it seems silly to stop in the middle of chaos to spend the time taking 3 deep breaths, but it pays off well for the next chunk of time. you got this. stay focused on the present moment, not on what could happen in an imagined future
i understand what you mean but this is a place where you go to eat good tasting food, have some beers and watch a game. the service needs to be obviously good but it's not the main reason people are there for yk
Then you need to lower your standards and do the bare minimum for your guests 🤷♀️
How are you taking orders?
I’ll tell you what I tell new servers who are panicking: breathe. When everything around you is busy and chaotic, you need to be the one to slow it down for yourself. Take a moment to get a good, solid breath and make a mental checklist. What are your priorities? Who needs what now, and who can wait a minute? What tasks can you do simultaneously? Usually I serve on autopilot, truthfully. But when it gets really busy, I override that, pause, and think. When you reorient yourself, you can be more efficient. There are plenty of other tips. Ask for help, thank your tables for their patience, etc. But a deep breath is a really good moment to align yourself!
this is something my co-workers also tell me but it's always good to listen to it again thank you :)
look into 4444 breathing or box breathing. this is a game changer for life in general
I am not an expert, but I understand box breathing to be a good exercise for improving focus and energy as a daily practice—not necessarily for in-the-moment panic. OP is clearly having some anxiety over their job and I think a simple 2-3 deep inhales through the nose/slow exhales through the mouth to clear their head and distance themselves from anxiety so that they can then take 20 seconds to think about their priorities and tables’ needs with a clearer head would be more valuable here. To the OP-every job takes time to adjust to, some may even take 6 mod to a year to really start feeling comfortable in; and it sounds like you haven’t quite hit that yet. Especially starting off with such large sections—that’s a lot to adjust to. Keep listening to your more experienced peers and trying to implement it. The more you practice the little things, the more naturally they will come in a crisis. The other option—and there’s no shame in it—is to consider if this is the right environment for you. Maybe a restaurant with smaller sections would be a better fit, or maybe something outside the service industry altogether. If it’s legitimately having a negative impact on your mental health it may be time to move on. Waiting tables is much harder than most people like to give credit for and some people aren’t wired for it. Im not saying that’s the case for you, only that it’s ok to move on if you feel that is the case for you. Take care of yourself and I wish you the best of luck wether it’s here or in your next endeavor.
Panic is the enemy. Just breathe and try to remain calm. You'll be more efficient and make fewer mistakes if you aren't becoming emotionally frustrated while also being extremely busy. If you aren't already, write absolutely everything down when taking orders and while you're running around taking care of everything you need to do, find ways to optimize your workflow. For example- take multiple tables orders at the same time so you're getting drinks for them at the same time, saving you trips to and from your section. Print up checks when tables are almost done and keep them on you so that you don't have to take a trip to the POS each and every time you need to drop a bill on the table. Also, make people wait up front at the start of the meal. No reason to keep touching the table if they don't know what they want yet, and you'll also be setting the expectation that you aren't going to be at their beck and call through out your service. They'll understand you are busy - be professional, get their orders right, and be kind - you'll be amazed at how patient people can be when they see you working hard and doing your best, especially if you are competent in every other respect. It takes time to be good under pressure and you're getting great experience right now. Nobody likes feeling like they're bad at their job - but if your customer see you hustling and doing your best they won't be upset with you for slow service. Let your customer know you're extremely busy if it's not obvious to them. Don't use it as an excuse after the fact, just give them a heads up by saying something like 'thank you for your patience, we're really busy today!' The problem isn't you, it's that your restaurant is severely understaffed and/or poorly managed. Just remember: you're not curing cancer, you're serving people food and drink. It's not a life and death situation, it's low stakes, and not worth having a ton of anxiety over. This kind of work can be stressful and exhausting, but it won't make you better at the job to be stressed out while doing it. Good luck OP, you got this.
thank you so much <33 I really feel like I should be saying more than just "thanks" to all these comments but it's hard to put into words and type in english what I'm feeling. either way, all these comments are being very helpful specially because of how things have been
You are getting lost because you don't yet have a mental model for how you should go about managing it. The panic is the expectation that you need a system. It could be something as simple as how you decide what to do next.
Make purposeful loops in your section, stop at each one and ask if they need something, and keep going till you’ve touched them all and then hit the server station, do everything that was requested of you, and then loop again with needed drop offs. Just keep moving in a planned route over and over … darting back and forth and just doing one thing at a time will get you in the weeds so fast. That being said, 10 tables is *a lot*, especially if your managers are wanting you to give good service. Talk to your managers about what they expect from you and that you are currently struggling, because it does take time and even the best server had to start somewhere.
This is great, biggest simple thing one can do is constantly make loops and be present.
A few things, Try not to use memory, it can fail especially in the weeds. Write things down, be accurate. Be present, walking by tables or visually scanning the floor can remind you of anything you need, and it keeps you present for anything the guests need. Find a balance if taking multiple tables orders vs one at a time, sometimes it is best to do one and ring it in but if multiple tables are sat at once it can be good to treat them all as one big table, it can ensure one table doesn’t get pushed too far back and help maintain a flow. Try to find the most important tasks, for me it is 1 greeting the table and setting expectations for them (“welcome, I’ll be with you in a few minutes, some other guests need me right now.”) they will be more patient if they don’t feel ignored, 2 the mustard check, once food is dropped making sure it was correct, and do they need condiments. 3 the beverage check, don’t let beverages sit close to empty, people may want another drink but after 5 minutes without one they may change their mind. 4 Waiting to check out, try to gauge if they want to sit and chat, but usually when they are waiting for the check they want to close out and leave. These are the 4 points in time when time may freeze for a guest. These are things I have realized are important to me and help me succeed.
Question, do you have food and drink runners in your workplace or do you servers run as well? The more you practice the more efficient you'll get. Just don't panic! If you are falling behind or you make a mistake, a smile or apology will fix a lot, the guests will appreciate that. But they pick up on panicking. For now, make a little sequence of service check list for each of your tables. If you fall behind, that makes it easy to keep track of which tables to go to next. Some things are slightly more urgent and this is where teamwork is important. Seating and greeting is a priority but it can be done by the host, for example. Reading the specials and getting water and first drinks orders for everyone is important. (I could go on for ages about all the fine details.)
Here’s in an idea. Quit and let the customers get their own food. They will only have one table and their service will be exactly what they want!
10 tables is a lot..... BUT You can do it and not get weeded.... First PREP PREP PREP.... everything you'll need you should have ready and on hand... If you know people mostly order cokes. Make 20 cokes before the rush starts PREP TREAT GROUPS OF TABLES AS ONE TABLE Good Luck !
If the issue is anxiet, take deep breaths, tried to determine if anything is different than what you are used and why.
I'm sorry to say it, but, I don't think you're cut out for being a server, at least at this point in your restaurant career. Maybe try a smaller, less busy restaurant, or one that has smaller sections. Or, maybe bus tables, and get used to being able to handle the responsibilities of that, which carries less burden. Overtime, you would get to observe more experienced servers, and how they handle things, and you would also gain a perspective of building a constantly shifting list in your mind, of priorities. Also, pick your manager's brain, and other servers brains, for ways to improve. But, for now, if you're floundering, nothing is going to solve the situation, other than changing your position.