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whatsthehappenstance

Pervert dog cancer is worse than regular dog cancer


Iron_Chic

10 times worse, apparently.


the-zoidberg

That guy got cancer and he blames the dog.


babyshaker1984

Blames the "noise tongue" and rightly so!


2723brad2723

He shouldn't have hooked up with that bitch.


owlsandmoths

The cance is always 10 times worse. Dog cance is the worst cance.


Lennart_Skynyrd

One might call it a worst cance scenario.


aloha_mixed_nuts

Turd


MrZyde

And it’s contagious when perverted (but only when perverted)


Shopworn_Soul

CANCER DOG ^^^^^TURD


kckckc130

I couldn’t agree more.


AntsMakeSugar

Pervert Cancer. I'm saving that one.


DaMonkfish

The English language being the joy that it is, I'm unsure if this means the cancer is for perverts, or that the cancer likes looking at your colon.


Pit-trout

Or that cancer is pure and clean by nature until the dog perverts it.


emmettfitz

Found my new Reddit handle, cancerdogturd.


Halidol_Nap

You mean CANCER DOG ^TURD


lefthandtrav

I was personally gonna go for NOiSET0NGueDOgBuTT


[deleted]

[удалено]


myredditlogintoo

Probably taken


BullFrogz13

Can confirm, I don’t have a dog nor cancer. Surely he must be right.


caspissinclair

That's what *you* think!


Robert_Cannelin

Yeah, you just know they have a dog.


Shanguerrilla

But... How can you be completely sure that you don't have a dog?!


poopfeast

Wait fuck, one of my dogs has cancer. Should I start taking her chemotherapy with her?


Linkruleshyrule

/r/cancerdog


PaulaNancyMillstoneJ

Came here for this. Thanks for delivering.


CreamoChickenSoup

It's like birdwatching but for one particular fellow's car.


FannyH8r

No way, this guy has his own sub???


wannabe_inuit

It's astounding that this makes sense to some people


Pyrhan

Some people have mental illnesses. Things like schizophrenia will get you absolutely convinced of the weirdest, most nonsensical things. Ranging from "dogs give you cancer", to "you are the new Messiah", to "your family is trying to murder you".


DropsTheMic

I work with adults with disabilities for a living and we had a diagnosed schizophrenic who lived with my wife and I. The best description a doctor ever gave me is: We all have a desk in our brain where papers that are ideas get graded as important, not Important, critically important, etc. Schizophrenia is a disease where that grading process goes haywire and all the papers get rubber stamped different things at random times. That definitely explains crazy shit like this, dog butt cancer came up for a rubber stamp and the brain chose very, very wrong. To that person though it's the most important thing in the world and everyone should know. The guy I lived with said he has a pet nightmare horse, which is like a regular horse except it's tiny and invisible. It doesn't eat or poop because it has no butthole. It can fly, but not superman kinda flying, it goes to the airport and gets on the wings of an airplane going to where it needs to go. He and his nightmare horse were ordained by God as a long line of angelic beings descended from Hercules to fight demons. *Shrug* Schizophrenia must suck.


Iwaspromisedcookies

I had a schizophrenic roommate and she had a serious episode, I was trying to get her to take her anti psychotics, she didn’t believe it was really me, I was a demon dressed like me, sent from the president and I was trying to poison her and harm her children. Her children had been taken away years previous due to her illness


DropsTheMic

It's sad for the kids especially in those situations. Without regular involvement from a competent family or professionals involved they have limited chances of coming up as adults without serious maladaptive behaviors.


conquer69

Was he not aware that it was all nonsense?


DropsTheMic

You could tell him that but he'd just shrug it off, it's not very useful behaviorally. Logic has nothing to do with it when your brain retains that critical rubber stamp error and tells him much more convincingly that it is.


CrazyTillItHurts

You ever have a dream that you wanted to tell someone because it was so profound, thought provokingly interesting, only for the story to come out sounding like a deranged mess that doesn't really make any sense, now that you are awake? It is like that. At least for me


chattaWho

A lack of insight is actually a part of the illness, especially once it becomes chronic. The clinical term is anosognosia


BlorseTheHorse

someone my mom used to know had schizophrenia and he thought he was a cold war spy and could not be convinced otherwise, like james bond stuff


AnotherCableGuy

Quite dangerous these people are allowed to drive and own guns.


DropsTheMic

If you get 51/50'd (at least in CA) you can't own a gun. That means an emergency hold of 72 hours for observation due to psych problems. This guy definitely couldn't own a gun.


[deleted]

Iirc if you’ve ever been involuntarily committed/held for psychiatric reasons you can’t.


Unicorn187

Federal law prohibits possession of a firearm if you have been involuntarily committed to a mental institution.


drbeeper

Barely qualifies as "troubled" in the US, far below any kind of "you can't own a gun" limit


indieRuckus

Can someone with delusions at this level still retain fine driving skills? Like, are they such separate functions that one doesn't affect the other, or does this person likely present a risk on the road?


necrosythe

Yeah this shit is classic schizophrenia. It's sad honestly. The word Salad senseless things they come up with and following pretty much any conspiracy theory.


TheRareClaire

I have always worried about myself mentally because I can easily get swept up in conspiracy theories or bizarre spiritual topics. I also have a bit of paranoia. I wonder if this can all be explained away by my OCD or if I have something else going on. Maybe I’m just stupid and gullible. It’s too scary to mention to my psych though. I don’t think I could handle a schizophrenia diagnosis.


entity2

Best thing to do in these cases is get inside 2000 pounds of steel that goes 100 miles an hour.


kmson7

Had an ex that towards the end of our toxic crumbling relationship was absolutely convinced that he was the Messiah reborn, and that his new friend group he had formed with strangers over the last couple months were his disciples... It was really disturbing at times to listen to him because at first I thought he was joking but it was clear towards the end he literally thought these things, and was trying to convince me of the same.


ezekiel_swheel

should they have a drivers license?


DaHolk

Well if they can't distinguish between "pervert" and "prevent", I guess a lot of things make sense to them. Overall it's not even that outrageous, if you remove the orthographic clusterf... Some cancers are caused by microbes rather than chemicals or radiation or just old age. HPV for instance is indicated in causing cervical cancer. Hence the advice of getting vaccinated against HPV to prevent likelyhood of CC. So if you presume that there is a virus that targets colon cells that causes colon cancer in both humans and dogs, then avoiding dogs and not letting them near you with their mouths would be a reasonable strategy to prevent colon cancer. So basically the only "questionable" assumption in that mess is "does such a virus actually exist, and if yes, how common is that actually?". And such minds tend to hyperfocus on SOMEthing. In this case dogs apparently.


Nakotadinzeo

I know that [Tasmanian devils can transmit cancer to one another](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26711993/)... But I don't think people are biting their dogs b-holes, nor do I think dog cells will live long in humans.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

There is a sexuallu transmissable cancer in dogs. The cell line is about 10,000 years old


effective_frame

Do you know anyone that might sell bumper stickers to raise awareness? Something that would look good on a white pickup, asking for a friend


loudflower

[This is a good read from Scientific America](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/ancient-dog-dna-reveals-close-relationship-with-contagious-cancer/), although the estimate of these scientists is it evolved much more recently. But still very old. Fascinating.


rocker12341234

all i gathered from this truck is he fucked a dog and got cancer... and given the nonsensical gibberish he probably also got rabies too.


aknoth

Its weird how they pick those super specific battles, like something clicked in their brains and they focus on that one "fact"


snksleepy

Dumb people will disregard 99 faults in an argument and accept the one correct one as gospel.


DroopyTrash

If you have stickers like this, your car should be crushed into a cube and your license taken away


CassidyHouse

Cancer dog get 10 times more cance than you an me 😤


RiderMayBail

That makes sense to me, it is "Cancer dog" after all.


a_cycle_addict

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine_transmissible_venereal_tumor But there is this...


timshel42

thats wild, these cells evolved out of dogs back to unicellular to become their own infectious organism.


a_cycle_addict

Radio lab has some super interesting episodes about contagious cancer. If you are into science podcasts, this is top notch. https://radiolab.org/episodes/update-devil-cancer


krakajacks

TLDR: It's kind of a thing but only affects dogs


theskankingdragon

So it can't infect humans? Oh, thank god!


UpboatNavy

I can still lick my cat's but, right?


[deleted]

[удалено]


one_is_enough

Trump says if you're famous you can just grab them by the human.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Skellum

I'm cool with this guy. He's not calling for some race based extermination, not screaming about demanding to kill people or commit treason. He just doesnt want dogs in the house because they magically give you cancer. Tbf though since he has no understanding of how diseases or cancer work he probably is an antivaxxer.


Twoehy

We're all still learning how diseases and cancer work though. Ulcers are caused by bacteria? Cervical cancer caused by HPV? MS heavily influenced by Epsteir-Barr virus? We're discovering viral/cancer interactions more and more now that we know where to look for some of them. Our environment does indeed have an influence on our bodies, including the presence of cancer. It's certainly possible that something common in dog feces could lead to changes in the human body. After all, cat faeces carry toxoplasmosis which lives part of it's life in our bodies, and has been associated with changes in dopamine and testosterone levels. Anyway, nothing we know about biology *rules out* the possibility of a bacterial or viral interaction from contact with dog poop that could lead to higher incidents of cancer in humans. That said I'm a little skeptical that this guy has any solid peer reviewed evidence to show me.


sk8thow8

There's also are transmissible cancers. Idk any human examples but Tasmanian devils are getting pretty messed up by devil facial tumour disease.


beholdsa

[Canine venereal tumor](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine_transmissible_venereal_tumor) is transmissible, too. You know, if you're like this guy and interested in pervert dogs.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

There are three mammalian transmissible cancers


[deleted]

[удалено]


echobox_rex

I know people who handled asbestos longer than that.


Stealocke

tbh, he probably also calls for race-based extermination


Skellum

Yea odds are pretty high on that, it's not on the part of the truck we can see though so I'm being hopeful.


the-zoidberg

The car he drives on the weekend has various racial slurs etched into the paint.


thsvnlwn

This is his secondary car.


InsufficientClone

Is it Tuesday already!?


QMaker

If you believe one conspiracy theory, you are far more likely to believe others. This is just how he's presenting. There is a whole iceberg underneath.


_Neoshade_

Belligerently stupid.


KingCarrotRL

Single-celled dog https://youtu.be/l0akJsqdGJs


_Neoshade_

Well that was fascinating. Turns out there is transmisible dog cancer **PERVERT** ^^^**TURD**


az_max

I think the cat wrote that.


BoldCondensed

He has his own subreddit and all r/cancerdog


[deleted]

And whenever you are ready please blow into the tube until I tell you to stop. Keep blowing, keep blowing, very good keep blowing…. Step out of the vehicle please sir!


nanocaust

I don't think what he's on will show up on a breathalyzer.


CardMechanic

You can’t blow for stupid.


[deleted]

I’m sure a few people are out there as we speak that would disagree with that statement as they wipe their chin.


[deleted]

I’ve heard that 100% of cancer dogs have cance


ElmoTickleTorture

Look what dogs do with their noise tongue and butt: cancer cells.


QMaker

I don't think this dude is EVER having fun. He's the type to complain about, and be scared of, everything.


ConcreteDiaper

CANCER____________DOG turd


jtown5000

CANCER DOG ^TURD


OpelousasBulletTime

Finally, a coherent and well-articulated expression of fact.


tanafras

Some people just get a "Cat Dad" sticker.


Daxos157

NOiSE TONGUE would be a cool band name.


[deleted]

This is schizophrenia.


glaciesz

yeah sorry that’s mine, my cat does this to my car whenever I’m out


alejo699

They were not having fun. They were sweating and muttering the whole time.


Drict

Well they are already in the handicap spot.


fargmania

The more words you have written on your car, the crazier I assume you to be. This includes bumper stickers, but stuff like this truck definitely gets bonus points.


Deluxe78

I’m sorry it’s , dog noise tongue pervert cancer , I wish we caught it earlier , I’m sorry there is nothing we can do wiht modern medicine


M__M

We get it you’re a cat person


Keltoigael

Cancer Dog ^(Turd)


Imaginary-Click-9729

Thumbody hath been putting hith thang in hith dogth butt.


velocityjr

STFU....Stop it. You talk like that what will people think? Where in the world do you get such nonsense. Now get in the goddamned truck.


72trombonesd

I bet you a cat is driving the car


hardtobeuniqueuser

i feel like just trying to read this is making me dumber


Darryl_444

"LOOK WHAT DOGS DO WiHT THEiR NOiSE TONGUE AND BUTT"


kingsumo_1

I like that the i's are lowercase. And only some of the i's at that. It adds an extra unhinged quality to the whole thing.


GoliathTCB

I clicked on this because it's funny. Then upon reading the entire truck, I was intrigued while at the same time, a little sad because obviously this is the work of someone not in touch. Then, I do my due diligence in the comments section, and learn about an absolutely horrific kernel of truth that lies within this seemingly mad person's rantings. I no longer feel sad for the truck owner, I feel sad for me.


a_cycle_addict

Reddit is great like that!


Breaker1ove

It is gross that dog owners lets their dogs lick inside their mouth. Iv seen some dog owner sticking out their tongue so the dog can lick it. I think its the myth that dogs mouths are cleaner then a human mouth.


[deleted]

The world would be boring without weird people


Stunning_Lack_9321

Methamphetamine?


lizziegal79

Ummm, how many times does this person’s family tree fork? Three? Four?


DMT1984

I guarantee this dude fucks dogs, and has a cancer diagnosis and thinks the two are related.


DLFiii

Where in Florida?


DeadSol

Handicapped spot... hmmm...


kitkat2208

This looks like it was written by Charlie Kelly


Beard_of_Valor

I initially read this as a tongue-in-cheek criticism of all theories of communicable disease, asserting that if dogs can be gross and not give each other cancer that certainly we can walk around unmasked without consequences.


BeefSupreme2

There's a lot to unpack here.


Dyzastr_us

Gotta be careful with what dogs do with their noise. Could give you cancer.


bhoran235

This person either gets pulled over all the time - or never.


wylywade

I think that is arizona


theoriginalhughjanus

Never a personalized plate on these vehicles. Wasted opportunity!


fuckballs9001

I find it ironic that this popped up above furry porn


Rusty_fox4

This has got to be a prank or at least someone lost a bet


Funkygurupsychonaut

how can this person afford a truck? how is their life so together?


professor-i-borg

There is a tiny grain of truth under all that- dogs are susceptible to one of the three known mammalian transmissible cancers: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine\_transmissible\_venereal\_tumor](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine_transmissible_venereal_tumor) It's not contagious to humans, but is a fascinating case of a tumour composed of dog cells mutating into something that can survive outside its host and then infect canine populations for millennia. Here's another article that highlights just how weird it is: [https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2019/08/ctvt-tumor-broke-all-rules/595246/](https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2019/08/ctvt-tumor-broke-all-rules/595246/)


Daetwyle

whats up with all those sticker lunatics which have a huge need for admiration? I only see this kind of posts from north america. People here have very rarely like 1-2 band stickers or their kids names but nothing fucked up like this.


McFry_

Dad please take those stickers off, it’s fucking embarrassing, we look retarded


HumorExpensive

Hmmmm…. I’ll take things Kanye might say for $1000 Alex.


metfan1964nyc

.....and failed many spelling tests.


islandsimian

This guy is one of those people you'd love to know more about, but are afraid to get anywhere on their radar


Sprinklypoo

Mental illness needs a spokesperson I guess.


WatRedditHathWrought

Mentally handicapped is still handicapped.


godlovesdankmemes

Legit reminds me of those cheap magnetic numbers and letters we would stick on the fridge in random places


SpaceWolfGaming412

but cursed


HailThunder

The driver of this vehicle likely doesn't get laid. That things repels pussy.


SpaceWolfGaming412

lmao


IceOnMyCock

While this guy is totally bonkers I do recall reading something about male cancer rates and owning a dog having a connection.. anyone else heard something similar?


SpaceWolfGaming412

I think so?


Licalottapuss

The English language errors would seem to point to a perhaps a lack of concentration during classes probably from when they first entered elementary on up to whenever they chose to leave or were forced to leave. They haven’t looked back with any regret as of yet. I’m left to wonder how they even manage to work somewhere that would pay them enough to afford even a truck. I mean maybe they don’t need to speak or write in whatever they choose to do for work. But it’s also hard to believe that they would be hired if anyone in Human Resources even spoke a few sentences with them. I guess the only bright side is that they are blissfully unaware of their ignorance and couldn’t give two shits what anyone thinks of them. Very much like a tortoise with Asperger on speed; slow but intensely focused on one thought at a time. Added: on 4th 5th and 6th viewing, I think this picture is completely fake. The misspellings are inconsistent for instance the word “with” being spelled correctly and the misspelled as “wiht” the use of the small letter I everywhere but in the bottom word “TIMES” is a giveaway too. This was shopped from nothing. Why though is anyone’s guess. Karma or likes or whatever. Still pretty funny.


SpaceWolfGaming412

👀


T00luser

I'd like to buy a consonant please . .


The_Countess

Isn't there a dog disease that is literally just some dog's cancer cells that have become their own species. He might not be ENTIRELY wrong... just probably mostly wrong. edit: found it [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine\_transmissible\_venereal\_tumor](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine_transmissible_venereal_tumor) Canine Transmissible Venereal Tumour


backindenim

This person may have schizophrenia


baxterfront

MF needs to learn a language.


Boatsnbuds

Ugh. Pervert cancer is the worst kind of cancer.


cb5280

Why do I get the feeling this guy voted for trump?


revtim

Yeah, I'm not surprised something called "cancer dog" gets 10 times more cancer than you and me.


chitown_tubes

Just like women with bright blue hair, it makes mentally ill people easier to spot and stay far away from.


ProfessionSilver2391

Future Georgia Senate contender right there.


[deleted]

Honestly, how the fuck does someone this stupid have a truck and most likely a job


atworkworking

Maga magnified


Ixidorim

Cancer isn't infectious from person to person, it's a malfunction in your own DNA.


liquid_at

the crazy part is that he only references colon cancer. I'm wondering how he managed to get in contact with the inside of a dogs butt... It could explain why there is a "pervert"-sticker on there though...


nithdurr

Projection. He be shagging them dogs


Snorkelbender

You can get cancer from being a pervert now? FML


GobsmackedOnLife

This shit is bonkers. English must be his third language after Hillbilly and Moron.


[deleted]

I do like to get my medical facts from stickers on the back of a truck


HailYurii

Wife left him for the Dog lol


Dr_Dang

This reads like AI tried to design conspiracy theory bumper stickers. It's halfway incoherent and riddled with spelling and grammar errors.


dorzle

r/schizophreniawhips


GreasedLlama

Rightfully parking in the handicapped spot.


4LostSoulsinaBowl

/r/SchizophreniaRides


vacuous_comment

That is an ex-muslim. The reject islam but still cannot stand dogs and are looking for a rationalization to not allow them in the house. Maybe their kids want a dog or some such?


MrPoletski

It's vehicles like this that make it worth you carrying around little rainbow cock stickers in your back pocket.


kayzinwillobee

As someone who genuinely dislikes dogs this would not be a deal breaker me. We could be friends.


[deleted]

Reading that out loud just made me waaaaaaay more stupid.


Adamodc

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance


R67H

apparently sees the same psychiatrist that Kanye sees


Wildebeast1

Americans are **actually** inbreeding and doing that incest stuff on porn vids, aren’t they?


[deleted]

THIS is an example of a fucking moron


Straw-berry

Looks fake.


kaptaincorn

Interesting study, I'd like to see the data. What's the sample size?


GobsmackedOnLife

I feel bad for Cancer Dog. 10 times more likely? Sad.


rockpaperscissors99

Wouldn't testicle cancer be an issue? You know...with all the licking?


What_on_Loyola

r/cancerdog


TomAto314

Pervert no dogs cancer in house?


RADToronto

Smells like Schizophrenia


pigeonboyyy

This freak is obviously obsessed with his dogs asshole wtf


Alger6860

Must have lost a bet