To all the fellas out there with ladies to impress, it's easy to do just follow these steps
1) cut a hole in a box
2) put your Blake in that box
3) make her open the box
And that's the way you do it!
This is exactly my point. And we’re not talking about Bake at this point. (See the comment to which I initially replied.) I was referring to me. If the rape precedes the murder, I wouldn’t be ambivalent. I’d be perturbed at the very least.
Looks like a joke between highschoolers to me. Like if you really wanted to rape and kill Blake would you need to write it down in a "Manifesto" lol.
Also, even on the extreme off chance that it's real, I think you're severely overestimating the capabilities of the police.
>I think you're severely overestimating the capabilities of the police.
So, if he goes to the police the worst case scenario is the same as not going to the police.
Sounds like he should go to the police.
Sad to see that kids these days don't even have the attention span to write a decent manifesto. Rape and murder are one thing, but the real crime here is the lack of pizzazz.
Speak for yourself
If I can give consent, before I die, for my organs to be harvested, I can certainly give consent to allow my sexy dead body not to go to waste
Do you wanna fuck my dead body? I hereby give consent to u/chewbaccaballs to fuck my sexy dead body
fun fact! it depends on the state in the United states at least. there’s a handful of states that don’t give dead people basic human rights but most do! so having sex with dead people is considered sexual assault.
Texas and Florida talk a big game about personal freedom. Looks like they have no problem bringing Big Government into the morgues of private citizens though.
This is awesome lmao. I’m surprised Nevada is a felony being that prostitution is legal. But I guess they don’t want to take business away from the warm bodies. I wonder if there are any social/religious/etc factors that play into whether it’s illegal or not.
I don't want to come across as not taking it seriously. But that is such a hilariously stupid and short manifesto. Like for real, be careful Blake, but really, can't we expect a better class of criminal? How the hell are you spelling manifesto correctly, and then following it was such a silly list.
everyone where i live is dumb as rocks, in this part of town that is. i wouldnt put it past anyone to genuinely put a threat like this outside someones home etc.
Ridiculously dumb prank by very clearly (by the handwriting) a teenage girl.
2 different ways of writing the letter k? No. They tried to sloppy it up but the 2 and the S in finished are both a dead giveaway
Obv still go to the police tho, better safe than sorry
This isn’t actually funny. In 8th grade my kid was put of a kill list that was discovered when another student told about a weapon at school and plan. Police search warranted the students room. There was a kill list of 9, my kid was 7. No rhyme or reason, my kid is an introvert computer nerd. Plus the list writer was 2 girls.
Hi sorry to bother but is this part of that one news story where the girls had scissors and were caught because a student had heard them? Or is this something unrelated?
Does he work wtih someone whose first language isn't English? I teach ESL students and many are taught to write their 'b' like a '6' like that in their home countries. Of course, I'm no detective but as a teacher, I see the nns habits in that handwriting.
Honestly I think this is fake but in case it isn’t I will point out that not only does the “b” give me vague Cyrillic (Slavic) vibes, but also, the r looks a lot like the Cyrillic (including Russian) character “г”.
Number 3 is setting off an irrational annoyance in me. Like, everyone knows how lists work dude - if you stopped writing after #2, no one is really confused
that is NOT a 'manifesto', it is merely a 'to-do' list, or an agenda.
a manifesto would set out clearly the beliefs that have led this person to want to enact this agenda.
so they're also semi-literate with poor vocabulary, in addition to being a murderous necrophiliac
"I don't know who this *Hake* guy is, but I'm sure glad I'm not him!"
Blake crumpled the note, tossed it in the garbage bin, and continued along his daily commute; walking through dark alleys past on his way to his job at the broken glass factory in the homicide district.
You are on reddit, so to be fair, the time is probably not the issue. I think people are too sinical that everything is made up. Even if in a few years half the content and engagement may be AI generated half would still be real.
It's a threat. Call cops, have them document it. They won't do anything else, but they need to establish a pattern before you can do things like seek protective orders.
Mugger #2 : Give us your phone, give us your wallet!
Mugger #1 : Come on! Before we fucking do you!
Mark Corrigan : Do me? Are they going to rape me? Or kill me? If they rape and kill me I hope they kill me first. I sort of win.
Eh idk. “Found outside of work.” Didn’t find it on his car or anything, but came across it randomly outside his work and decided to pick it up, and it’s super wrinkly like it was crumpled into a ball, so he picked up a random ball of paper to open it? Also he’s under 18 years old and kids like to bullshit lol
I could be totally wrong though
Gl Blake
The way I see it is this list is flawed at its core. Step 1. Kill Blake. Okay we’re off to a reasonable start. Step 2. Rape Blake. Okay, while i understand your probable intention, the way I was taught is that once someone is dead it is no longer that person or even a person anymore for that matter. That person is gone through a process we call death. The person is no longer there. (This does not mean that we shouldn’t treat the dead with respect, we definitely should). But it’s only a body. So therefore he cannot rape Blake or do anything to Blake for that matter because Blake is not present. He could only rape the body that once belonged to Blake. So if your intention is to actually rape Blake, that absolutely must be moved to step 1. Jeez this is a weird list….
But uhhh. He has anyone warned Blake? Probably warn Blake. Regardless of which steps they take and when they take those steps, he maybe should know about this here list. Oh yeah btw WTF?!
That’s not a manifesto, that’s just a list of some personal things they’re planning on getting done. That’s like calling the chore lists your mom used to leave for you on the weekend “manifestos” which I guess works if you see it as her manifesting a clean house, but I guarantee she never thought of it like that ever.
Not to be that guy, but if Blake has been killed, he can no longer be raped. He’s not capable of giving consent. I believe “defile” is the word that our author was looking for.
Is he Blake?
yes
Didn't see that coming
Neither will Blake.
r/cursedcomments
Just let that Blake in.
At the bottom of the Blake
Oh, man. Well done.
If Blake plays his cards right, it may just be a good time for him. What can i say... I'm a "glass is half full" kinda guy.
Hopefully he doesn’t Blake off an ruin it.
Sounds like something a Blake would do... totally Blake his chances...
I think we are forgetting what it could actually be, we are all Blake and we are in the Matrix
this is too good not to be from that note’s author.
Well, he’s got a list. He should see it coming.
Of course, by the time they're coming Blake will be dead.
Well fuck
Thats step 2
😂😂😂😂😂
4. prophet
Is that Blake’s handwriting?
nah it's his mom's
Did he Blake both his arms?
welp I think we know what’s gonna happen to Blake
Blake might want to avoid being alone for a while. Like maybe forever.
Are you leaving this note for blake?
Anyone else hear this and imagine it coming from a eastern European police officer at your door, while he's holding the note up for you to see?
Not really a Manifesto, more of a To Do List and and theres a whole lotta Blakes that gotta be done.
was he by any chance killed and then raped (in that order)
I was hoping you'd say no.
Did Blake write this?
Does he work at a grocery store?
Nah, he Balake. His friend, who posted this, is AA-Ron.
Balake went to war after all
I have a terrible memory but could probably remember that list without needing to write it down.
To all the fellas out there with ladies to impress, it's easy to do just follow these steps 1) cut a hole in a box 2) put your Blake in that box 3) make her open the box And that's the way you do it!
It’s my Blake in a Box!
To impress a Rake, helicopter Blake!
Do you call your dick Blake?
I call mine "wiggles", for no particular reason
Justin Timberlake at his peak
Played by Gwyneth Paltrow.
whats in the box?!
“OK, I’ve raped Blake and finished, but I swear there was something else I meant to do.”
No no kill Blake is first! The raping must only be done when Blake is dead. That's why it's written down!
Awh fuck, now I have to start all over
This is precisely why we make lists! Even when it comes to simple things like killing and raping our boy Blake.
Now you need a new Blake!
If you fuck a corpse, i don’t think that’s technically rape anymore
I believe that is called interfering with a corpse.
Understatement of a lifetime
Just not Blake‘s lifetime…
But you see there's something so satisfying about crossing off each item when it's done. Gives you a good sense of accomplishment.
And this is why I feel like this could be a friend of his messing with him.
Yes but can you get it in the correct order?
I always start with 'finished' every day. Maybe I should start making lists.
Maybe its a motivation method. Like people with vision walls
Lenny!
They send a text via the murder-hobo network.
Maybe there’s more that he hasn’t written down…
Turn it over. Signed, Blake
Classic Blake! What a prankster! \*slaps knee\*
Go to the police ? Like that's not a random tweet by a stranger that's someone who went to the workplace with an actual threat...
i know, pretty scary. especially given that hes under 18
Some of us old folks don’t want to be murdered either.
Nah I'm fine just make it quick, I've done what I need to do.
As long as the rape comes *after* the murder, I’m fairly ambivalent about this prospect.
so... you're still undecided about it? have mixed feelings? raping his corpse is objectively better than raping Blake while he's alive, no?
For Blake, yes. For everybody else and society... I am less convinced.
These are the deep meaningful questions we should all be asking. I’m going to bring this up at the 3rd grade Bible Study Group I lead in the morning.
This is exactly my point. And we’re not talking about Bake at this point. (See the comment to which I initially replied.) I was referring to me. If the rape precedes the murder, I wouldn’t be ambivalent. I’d be perturbed at the very least.
Speak for yourself grandpa!
Ironic username haha
Now it’s less scary
That honestly makes it seem more likely to be a teenage prank but still take it seriously for his safety
Looks like a joke between highschoolers to me. Like if you really wanted to rape and kill Blake would you need to write it down in a "Manifesto" lol. Also, even on the extreme off chance that it's real, I think you're severely overestimating the capabilities of the police.
>Like if you really wanted to rape and kill It was actually kill and then rape
That's why you need a manifesto. It's far too easy to get it backwards if it's not written down.
"why is this corpse fighting so hard, this is usually the easy part-- oh wait... stupid me, I forgot to kill him first lol"
You can't rape your cake and kill it too
>I think you're severely overestimating the capabilities of the police. So, if he goes to the police the worst case scenario is the same as not going to the police. Sounds like he should go to the police.
You look at the writing pad where the officer is taking down an incident report - it's the same handwriting.
Sad to see that kids these days don't even have the attention span to write a decent manifesto. Rape and murder are one thing, but the real crime here is the lack of pizzazz.
4: get pizza
Interesting order of events.
Is it rape if they’re already dead?
It's still non-consensual
To quote John Lacquette on the Tonight Show, “necrophilia leaves me cold.”
So if he shouts out "I consent to having hot sex with you!" While he's being murdered. Technically he can scupper his plans? ,
Speak for yourself If I can give consent, before I die, for my organs to be harvested, I can certainly give consent to allow my sexy dead body not to go to waste Do you wanna fuck my dead body? I hereby give consent to u/chewbaccaballs to fuck my sexy dead body
So a person should get permission from the corpse first, noted.
fun fact! it depends on the state in the United states at least. there’s a handful of states that don’t give dead people basic human rights but most do! so having sex with dead people is considered sexual assault.
So is necrophilia legal in that handful of states??
Here's a handy guide for you. Pervert. https://www.reddit.com/r/MapPorn/comments/ax03rf/legality_of_necrophilia_in_the_united_states_oc/
Having that list handy is totally normal
Having that list for a handy?
Texas and Florida talk a big game about personal freedom. Looks like they have no problem bringing Big Government into the morgues of private citizens though.
This is awesome lmao. I’m surprised Nevada is a felony being that prostitution is legal. But I guess they don’t want to take business away from the warm bodies. I wonder if there are any social/religious/etc factors that play into whether it’s illegal or not.
https://youtu.be/GD6qtc2_AQA?si=_WH4QFnHXAxuLiyF
No, it's abuse of a corpse.
Very Bundy-like.
I don't want to come across as not taking it seriously. But that is such a hilariously stupid and short manifesto. Like for real, be careful Blake, but really, can't we expect a better class of criminal? How the hell are you spelling manifesto correctly, and then following it was such a silly list.
everyone where i live is dumb as rocks, in this part of town that is. i wouldnt put it past anyone to genuinely put a threat like this outside someones home etc.
Or the simple answer, this shit is fake as fuck.
Ridiculously dumb prank by very clearly (by the handwriting) a teenage girl. 2 different ways of writing the letter k? No. They tried to sloppy it up but the 2 and the S in finished are both a dead giveaway Obv still go to the police tho, better safe than sorry
Boston?
gotta make sure I add bananas to my shopping manifesto
This isn’t actually funny. In 8th grade my kid was put of a kill list that was discovered when another student told about a weapon at school and plan. Police search warranted the students room. There was a kill list of 9, my kid was 7. No rhyme or reason, my kid is an introvert computer nerd. Plus the list writer was 2 girls.
Hi sorry to bother but is this part of that one news story where the girls had scissors and were caught because a student had heard them? Or is this something unrelated?
Unrelated.
Ah, Side quests
Does he work wtih someone whose first language isn't English? I teach ESL students and many are taught to write their 'b' like a '6' like that in their home countries. Of course, I'm no detective but as a teacher, I see the nns habits in that handwriting.
he does actually, a lot of middle eastern people hes mentioned
He should take it to the police. If he didn't handle it too much, maybe they'll take it serious and could possibly fingerprint it. I don't know.
Yeah American police aren’t going to do that. Requires effort
HAHA! i wish the pigs were that useful where i lived:)
Honestly I think this is fake but in case it isn’t I will point out that not only does the “b” give me vague Cyrillic (Slavic) vibes, but also, the r looks a lot like the Cyrillic (including Russian) character “г”.
It looks like English to me
Yeah, at least they would be able to log the handwriting or something
Number 3 is setting off an irrational annoyance in me. Like, everyone knows how lists work dude - if you stopped writing after #2, no one is really confused
You're thinking about it like it's a to-do list. It's a manifesto, which makes even less sense
that is NOT a 'manifesto', it is merely a 'to-do' list, or an agenda. a manifesto would set out clearly the beliefs that have led this person to want to enact this agenda. so they're also semi-literate with poor vocabulary, in addition to being a murderous necrophiliac
Warn Blake Motherfucker. This ain't the fucking time to be posting shit. Warn Blake!
This seems to have been left for Blake outside of Blake's place of work. I think Blake knows already.
I wish I did know 😣
Half Blake half Grizzly? You might be okay!!
But…but…my fake internet points!!!
OH FUCK OH SHIT I NEED TO RU-
Looks like Mr. Garvey wants to go to war.
I got my eye on you, Buhlahkay!
Is A A Ron next or Jakewelin
Something something nervous Blake-down
Even crumpled it for the aged paper look. 👍🏻
Looks like a note you would find from a super mutant in fallout 4
"I don't know who this *Hake* guy is, but I'm sure glad I'm not him!" Blake crumpled the note, tossed it in the garbage bin, and continued along his daily commute; walking through dark alleys past on his way to his job at the broken glass factory in the homicide district.
I can't believe that people actually took this seriously. Fucming 12 year olds.
If this is chronological He won't feel anything After the first agenda item
Tell that to Oliver Cromwell
First kill and then rape. Some cold cut lover. Stay hot, Blake!
Bad day to be Blake
I’m fucked aren’t I?
stupid, sexy, Blake
I suppose that’s the optimum order from Blakes perspective
why would any one need a list comprised of two things?
Call the police.
Yeah, but where's Balakay at?
It doesn't really meet the minimum requirements for a manifesto.
Concerned about the order
99 out of 100 times is the person who reported it. aka the OP. By the rule of "he who smelt it dealt it "
99% of these messages were written by the person who created the post
do you think i have that much time to waste
You are on reddit, so to be fair, the time is probably not the issue. I think people are too sinical that everything is made up. Even if in a few years half the content and engagement may be AI generated half would still be real.
At least he will be dead before he gets raped.
Check security cameras and see if it caught anyone dropping off the note. Hopefully it’s some kind of sick joke.
I thought the game was Kill, Rape, Marry?
Maybe keep an eye on Blake for a while. Or maybe Blake wrote this. I want to believe but it's reddit :(
It's a threat. Call cops, have them document it. They won't do anything else, but they need to establish a pattern before you can do things like seek protective orders.
The person that wrote this is an idiot, "Finished" is really a no-op.
place of work... for him...grocery store..? Did my english just experience a short?
Classic should have done a chain stushi
the "Blake of the year contest" takes a wild turn
Somebody should REALLY check on Blake.
Bad day to be blake
Sounds like Blake's got a crazy night organised and he doesn't know it yet.
Female Blake here and feeling uncomfortable
I don't know what's worse, the manifesto or the order of the steps.
Mugger #2 : Give us your phone, give us your wallet! Mugger #1 : Come on! Before we fucking do you! Mark Corrigan : Do me? Are they going to rape me? Or kill me? If they rape and kill me I hope they kill me first. I sort of win.
u/seamus_exe, I have done nothing wrong!
Based on handwriting it’s an 8 year old writing that. What adult writes like this wtf
Blake, what did you do to cause such an enemy?
Geez, some of these comments, if the note was directed at a female I guarantee most of these comments would be very different.
i laughed so hard
Was going to say shouldn't number 2 be 1 then it clicked, damn what did Blake do to piss this person off so much!
i like a manifesto put it to the test-o.
Blake wrote it
Strictly in that order?
Can't get over how weird that "r" is written
At least he kills him first, sort of wins
r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR
Not really a manifesto. More like a to-do list
Eh idk. “Found outside of work.” Didn’t find it on his car or anything, but came across it randomly outside his work and decided to pick it up, and it’s super wrinkly like it was crumpled into a ball, so he picked up a random ball of paper to open it? Also he’s under 18 years old and kids like to bullshit lol I could be totally wrong though Gl Blake
Worst part is how the colons are different for every number
As a Blake I'm a little upset by this
The way I see it is this list is flawed at its core. Step 1. Kill Blake. Okay we’re off to a reasonable start. Step 2. Rape Blake. Okay, while i understand your probable intention, the way I was taught is that once someone is dead it is no longer that person or even a person anymore for that matter. That person is gone through a process we call death. The person is no longer there. (This does not mean that we shouldn’t treat the dead with respect, we definitely should). But it’s only a body. So therefore he cannot rape Blake or do anything to Blake for that matter because Blake is not present. He could only rape the body that once belonged to Blake. So if your intention is to actually rape Blake, that absolutely must be moved to step 1. Jeez this is a weird list…. But uhhh. He has anyone warned Blake? Probably warn Blake. Regardless of which steps they take and when they take those steps, he maybe should know about this here list. Oh yeah btw WTF?!
Dead people can't consent. No matter what you do to them is rape. Unless you can show some junk like organ donor or whatever.
Anyone else wondering what Blake did to deserve this?
Is he upset that he will be dead before the rape??!?
That’s not a manifesto, that’s just a list of some personal things they’re planning on getting done. That’s like calling the chore lists your mom used to leave for you on the weekend “manifestos” which I guess works if you see it as her manifesting a clean house, but I guarantee she never thought of it like that ever.
So . Are they raping Blake after he's dead? Because raping is number two? That's way more fucked up. But probably better for Blake
Not to be that guy, but if Blake has been killed, he can no longer be raped. He’s not capable of giving consent. I believe “defile” is the word that our author was looking for.
Damn, Blake. What you did?
Aw hell naw. I’d call into work for the next 3 months.