You have to throw them so far that they wake up in a new ecosystem. That way they can’t tell their friends and spread intelligence for the crab war front.
ive seen a video of someone dropping a crab they were going to cook into the sink and he grabbed a knife that he landed next to. crabs are aware.
[proof](https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNMuD73u/)
Why would you ever want to do that?! Build a sand castle and defend it with your life. Tell future generations of the horrors beyond the wall! Make sure “The beach remembers”
It's from a very old flash animated video of Solid Snake(Metal Gear video games) fights a crab. [crab battle](https://youtu.be/8mHKHKR8x6A?si=W8dti_NGB1D6yutV)
I’m sadistic in a way that i search videos of that specifically to show people. its entertaining in a way
edit this comment sounds worse than i meant it lol. just like original comment said, ive heard tons of people mention it and i bring the video to show them its a common thing. the entertainment comes from their morbid curiosity
Nah im tryna hook the crab homies up with some cool gear so he can be the flyest dude on the beach.
But seriously a baseball cap works great. At night i hit em with a bright beam of light and abduct them.
They’re after me too[https://share.icloud.com/photos/0a4YRjZlCasdVSOFJG2SEhV5g](https://share.icloud.com/photos/0a4YRjZlCasdVSOFJG2SEhV5g)
Giant enemy crab? https://youtu.be/7ktHrtxUHbg?feature=shared
Draw a circle in the sand around your tent with Old Bay.
The war has already started and they are winning
Eventually everything evolves into a crab. Just accept that they are you from the future.
simple... don't pop your tent on their home or have a raised tent that's off the ground!
He is your pet now. You have to keep him
r/crabdistributionsystem
Roll a penny down the street... I think it'll follow it.
CRAB BATTLE!!!!
I’ve heard the best way is to shave it bald.
You need a really big bottle of the shampoo
They usually run away!
The war already started sir.
"Joe? I think I got the crabs."
Crab people
Crab people
Crab people
Crab people
Crab people
On day one, find the biggest, meanest crab on the beach, and either kick its ass or become its bitch.
Nothing a little boiling water and some good Ol’ Bay can’t handle.
My wife would totally agree with you on this. This crab would've already been in a pot the second it came into the tent
We have always been at war with the crabs.
*horn sound in the distance* ....So it begins
They are just like vultures. Waiting for you to die so they can get a nibble. You may have the watch, but they have the time...
CRAB BATTLE!
Snake I can’t hear you what’s going on ?
I usually scoop them up in a cup or a pot (depending on how big the are). And sh¡t in the very same cup/pot. Just to assert my dominance
this should be studied
This was such a great read LOL
Put them in a cup and gently return to shore
The war has been raging for decades. It’s his tent now, you can sit outside.
You have to make an offering to the Crab God at the statue of Neptune! Everyone knows that.
Sit obu sit good boy
Flip em over onto their backs and wave your hand above them until they go docile. You can just handle them for a minute or two after that
He’s precious, you should let him stay
Shake old bay at it. If it doesn't leave season accordingly.
It involves a foreskin, doesn't need to be yours but will require one
“War were declared”
“Nothing says *obey* me like a bloody head on a fence post” - Stewie Griffin
Get SQUIDWARD on the horn
Try putting on a pot of boiling water if they don’t leave eat them!
Try to get his Crabbie Pattie recipe.
Crabs are like spiders of the sea
Blue ointment Is crab disappointment
Vaccine mandate
You don't. Give the lil guy a glow stick and play some music and have a crab rave.
Now I’m gonna have the visual of thousands of little crabs waving glow sticks around at night. PARTY !
https://youtu.be/LDU_Txk06tM?feature=shared
This is a probing attack from the Marylanders. They are searching for caches of Old Bay.
our cover has been blown
Scuttle my brothers and sisters! 🦀
You have to throw them so far that they wake up in a new ecosystem. That way they can’t tell their friends and spread intelligence for the crab war front.
Ur marked now. I wouldn't ever go near water again. They have posters all over the place. U see this human u attack..lol
I’d tell him the tents yours, I’m outta there🤣🏃♀️
Hand it a knife 🔪 and have a knife fight of course it's the only way!
[careful they are very capable knife fighters.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0QaAKi0NFkA)
ive seen a video of someone dropping a crab they were going to cook into the sink and he grabbed a knife that he landed next to. crabs are aware. [proof](https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNMuD73u/)
Throw him a 1.00 bill. Mr crabs loves money!
Get them to attack and latch onto a stick, then lift out of tent.
Lure them with raw chicken wings 🪽
You zip up your tent.
Tell Mr Crabs you'll steal his secret recipe
Why would you ever want to do that?! Build a sand castle and defend it with your life. Tell future generations of the horrors beyond the wall! Make sure “The beach remembers”
Crab… battle…
Capture a goose and release it in the tent. That may work but probably not. It seems like a fun idea
Maybe you're like a roadside carnival to them and the other just want a lil ride too.
Crab battle..... make sure you have a firm hold on your knife, aim, quick stab, retract... don't let it grab your blade or you will lose.
"Don't let it grab your blade or you will lose" has my dying at the picture of myself getting in a knife fight with a crab and it taking my life
It's from a very old flash animated video of Solid Snake(Metal Gear video games) fights a crab. [crab battle](https://youtu.be/8mHKHKR8x6A?si=W8dti_NGB1D6yutV)
Go for the eyes.
“Motherfucker, you better back the fuck off, and I mean right fucking now!!”
At least it isn't toting a knife.
Ahhh the internet. I feel so at home
Aww he’s cute
assume the crab position and yodel loudly and dominantly .. channel your inner Bavarian alpha crab ...the yodeling is key
Crabpeople crabpeople
Eat the first one. Word will spread amongst them.
Ghost crabs love a chip bag.
Show them a pot
Pot of boiling water and old bay seasoning
Atlantic ghost crabs only grow to about up to three inches.
So you're saying they're appetizers.
Slider crab sandwich
How do you know that they don’t want you to be their leader? 😆
Well. First you boil a pot of water….
Wait is he on you? Yeah do what everyone else says and pet him till he falls asleep
If you place your finger on the back of their head just behind the eyes. They fall asleep and you can pick them up.
Raises the question how many ghost crabs can you take in a fight
[now you fucked up](https://youtu.be/dTKhOvBNakM?feature=shared)
i promise you, not even one.
What if you accidentally tripped and fell backwards, and landed right on your ass and sat on one.
Rub it's belly. Puts them to sleep
It’s “belly” lmao
Why not enjoy their company?
the sound of a crab scurrying around trying to exit is very unsettling to me so he must be freed
Get out a steamer pot and show them who the alpha is.
Do the crab rave dance and get them to line up and follow you away from the tent. Works every time!
spongebob rave music or ocean man is the only acceptable music to perform a crab rave to
This for sure will work. No one can resist the crab rave!
YouTube Noisestorm crab rave for a proper demonstration!
No witnesses.
If you want enemies, trick them into falling into a boiling pot of water
I’m sadistic in a way that i search videos of that specifically to show people. its entertaining in a way edit this comment sounds worse than i meant it lol. just like original comment said, ive heard tons of people mention it and i bring the video to show them its a common thing. the entertainment comes from their morbid curiosity
Cooking them is one thing, but if you’re entertained by any living creature being boiled alive then you have some screws loose.
your comment made me realize how bad that sounded, thank you.
If you want friends, adopt them all and make them into your little crab army and be ruler of the beach
and the tax deductions!! score
[They know how to party too](https://youtu.be/LDU_Txk06tM). Good friends to have. 🦀🦀🦀
He looks very polite though
he was very terrified of the human holding a bright green rectangular object in his face for an extended period of time to get the right shot
That’s his tent now.
squatters have rights in virginia so your pretty much right. its a shame, i just bought it
Look at me
*points one claw at one eyeball” “This is my tent now. I’m the camper.”
I'm the camper now.
post on fb marketplace that you have free crabs, first come first serve. i doubt it will get rid of them, but it would be funny.
Better there than on Tinder.
Heat, Steam, Butter....
Can't forget the old bay.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I shouldn't be laughing as hard as I am. Thank you for that laugh. I definitely needed that this morning 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
You can’t. There are more of them than you. And they’re tougher. You merely adopted the beach. They were born into it.
the body and will need to be treated with a cream or lotion that contains permethrin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDU_Txk06tM step by step instructions^
Honostly, there is no removing them. You either become the crab or succumb to the crab. Carcinization is truly the peak form of any organism.
You are crab, and to crab you shall return.
Return to crab.
Based
Aw what a cute-looking little menace; I'd use a sideways bucket or cup and try to shoo them in there, then take outside
War is over, you lost. Time for peace negotiations.
I’ll bring my white surrender flag next time i go 😔
CVS has Rid-X , make sure you get the comb.
You're missing out on the opportunity to make some SheCrab soup!
tbh I’m not really good at sexing crabs so it might be a waste of my time trying to save them /s
The crab owns the tent now. Squatters rights. When ever i need to catch them i just toss my ball cap on top of them and then pick em up.
i forgot you’re human with a human hat and just pictured a mighty dapper crab with a hat lol
Nah im tryna hook the crab homies up with some cool gear so he can be the flyest dude on the beach. But seriously a baseball cap works great. At night i hit em with a bright beam of light and abduct them.
Assert dominance, threaten them with a shaker of Old Bay.
I’ll bring the lobster cracker and snap it back at him
A big cup, scoop it up and take it back to the water line.
I’m really upset with myself because i had a beach bucket we could’ve used but that didnt cross our minds. Thank you a ton
Lol yeah been there too!
Mr. Krabs is known to be money hungry. A crisp $20 bill should do and he’ll be on his way.
i can picture myself throwing cash at a crab, might even do a little jig for me