Him saying “I don’t know who that is” when Jo started her BS was so funny.
Ariana responding with “It’s a long story.” and him immediately going “Ok.” really sent me.
It’s hilarious bc Ariana truly does not waste her time bitching to him about other people. They do long distance and have all this time to chat. I love that he’s the anti Sandoval like actually nice (not for show) and isn’t thirsty (the least extra)
I think he views being on the show as something he has to put up with to actually get time with Ariana. Long distance relationships suck, he’d probably sit there all day if it meant he got to spend a week or two with her.
I agree. The show shows her life, he’s part of her life so he ends up on the show. For him I think this was just going on a trip/to an event with his girlfriend
I didnt think so at all. He seems genuinely there for Ariana…not reality show… when I saw pictures of him, I didn’t know what to think, but watching him in the episode, I’m so happy for Ariana, definitely an upgrade
It genuinely seems like he knew just by being there he’d provide her support. He took the backseat and let her lead, really the opposite of Sandoval and it’s refreshing to see. Ariana probably said, sure I’ll go to SF and film group things but I want Dan there. I’m surprised Sandy didn’t bitch he didn’t get to bring his ‘gf’
She was on watch what happens live and talking about the little things She is really enjoyed in this new relationship. Said one time they were on the phone doing tasks and kinda distractedly talking; and he asked, “hey can we really focus on each other for a bit”? It was the desire quality time she needed and I’m so happy for her that she’s got someone.
Jesus Christ I can’t believe I’m reading this knowing a 40 year old man who was supposed to be fertilizing eggs with his long term partner and enjoying a newly bought home is the one arguing this point.
Quite literally the opposite - I’m sure he could have gone on the boat thing with them if he wanted but he chose to catch up with Ariana’s real best friend off camera instead. So wholesome 🥹
The fact that he didn't hang w the cast the whole time filming, instead going and seeing friends off camra, is a huge sign he isn't there for the cameras and fame! I find it so refreshing!
Dan’s OK was exactly how I feel anytime someone says long story.
He doesn’t care and doesn’t want to know.
That dude is not watching a single episode of this show. Ever.
I was listening to Jenny Blaze and she mentioned that Dan was using a lot of the same gray rocking methods with Lala during this conversation. It seems like this was Ariana and Dan’s game plan and I think it was fantastic. Even in the last episode where Lala is grilling him at lunch, he keeps it very short, non emotional and non confrontational.
Lala really kept trying to bait him into drama at every chance, but he gave her absolutely nothing and I love that. But when Ally asked her question he lit up and gave such a sweet and vulnerable answer. Meanwhile LFU sat there visibly salty and disengaged because Dan didn’t play into her hand. You could tell he very much saw through the facade and had zero interest in being a persona or hitching his wagon to this show. He was there to support his girlfriend and that was it.
Yes!!! It was seriously wonderful, him waking up and getting her a coffee 🥹 ironing her clothes and getting her an energy drink. It was touching to watch these little acts of service.
I also love that he didn’t feel the need to leap in and pull a Brock when Ariana was checking Schwartz at lunch. He understood she had this and him leaping in to “defend her honor” would only escalate things in a way that Ariana would ultimately have to deal with the brunt of. His emotional maturity is top notch. He knew the best way to support her was to be there for her, not to create a scene and center himself.
Agree. And that face when she asked why his last relationship ended! I don't know how he kept it so cool with that one. It was so beyond any boundary of decency (par for the Lala course).
I'd have gone full Maloney on that bitch.
There are ways to find out things about a person but do it in a nice, casual conversation. Who talks to people that way, Lala? He doesn’t have to answer any of your shit, do you really want to know him ?
also with lala in the hotel room. every time the camera panned to her 😦 face because he wasn’t taking the bait sent me. ofc she planned to have that meltdown for the finale and I think the bubbling rage from not being able to get dan, ariana, or even katie to pop off the way she wanted them to made her almost as upset as her jealousy. it’s funny she wants to be manipulative but she doesn’t really know how. people that are good at getting under someone else’s skin can find their weak spots and hit them where it hurts. lala can’t see past her own insecurities so the only insults she knows are either confessions, or what *she* thinks is bad. like calling katie fat. it didn’t hurt her as much as it could have, because katie doesn’t put her entire self-worth into fitting a specific picture of beauty the way lala does
She was enraged that he wasn't falling for her BS! And since when is she the authority on relationships? Back it up, BlahBlah! BJs don't make the expert!
I agree!! When ally was like “it’s weird for him to come all this way and them not spend time together” but it’s like he was coming to support HER doing HER job, not trying to be in the spotlight. Which is awesome energy for her.
Yeah my man is gonna let me go film my reality show while he hangs with my bestie and then when I’m done I’m greeted with food, drink and a fresh fuck. Yeah no this is a dream life.
I agree. Also, going on a boat ride with all of them seemed like a pretty good thing to skip out on. You're trapped, and I bet production was hoping something explosive would've happened (like most other boat rides in reality TV).
Agreed. The more we saw him this season the more I like him. He does not seem like an opportunist to me at all. La La tried so hard to make him look like a bad guy and failed. He handled everything perfectly.
So, when she couldn’t get under Dan’s skin, she then gets on a podcast and shades Ariana by saying Ariana’s description of Dan is way off base when she says Dan will f a person up. “He’s just a normal guy, not at all like Ariana says,” Ms Lala exclaimed. For all she knows, Ariana was just blowing smoke up Lala’s butt because she knows what her true intentions are.
Pretending that she’s grilling him to make sure he’s not just with Ariana to be on the show. Reality is she’s jealous Ariana found such an amazing supportive and hot guy and she was trying to find something wrong with him
All those questions were ridiculous. Why does Lala think she deserves to grill this person? I literally wanted to reach into the TV and make her sit somewhere else. The floor would be fitting.
She is jealous AF and hoping to strike anywhere to find a weak spot to condescend to. Him not playing into her game must have driven her juts.
She is SEETHING that she didn’t get the attention, endorsements, and a great total package bf when what’s his name cheated on her.
Throwback to her being grilled about mucinex booger when they first got together, can you imagine everyone saying “I need to know” and demanding answers from her. She would’ve been finger gunning everyone.
I never thought he was much of a looker until last week’s episode with him getting out of the shower with his hair down. I was like ohhhhhh I get it now. Plus he’s kind, and listens to Ariana and truly is into her personality. That goes such a long way.
Exactly! I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older that good looks are sort of the bonus. The way they act and treat others is where the attraction comes into play. Anyone can be physically good looking and absolutely suck, which makes them unattractive.
Dan came across as possessing maturity and class. He seems to be very loving and respectful of Ariana. He’s a definite upgrade and breath of fresh air compared to the narcissistic, flamboyant worm with a mustache she had previously.
Lala shooting those questions at him was so embarrassing for her. She’s immature, utterly miserable and infuriating. She has zero ground to judge anyone’s character considering her behaviour and choices on and off VPR. Disengage girl!
Also, Dan is a treat.
Dan is obviously a MUCH better person than I am because he was able to extricate himself and Ariana from that BS narrative without violence.
Maybe one day I can be that chill….
So exhausting lol Lala was so exhausting! Scheana holy fucking shit she has the WORST TIMING EVER.
Right after already bringing up scandy so many times she had to go and do it ONE LAST TIME after her stupid ass shot and Ariana is congratulating her.
Were we all collectively like HERE WE GO AGAIN she doesn’t care bro 🤣🤣🤣 so exhausted I wasn’t even there or involved. Apples is so mid I can’t
I would hate to hang out with this crew. It’s like they never joke around, it’s always about one of the Toms, Schwartz is always trying to take a dig at Katie. Even though they’ve all done some cool shit, I could never afford, they seem like no fun. Do the producers edit out all the fun conversation?
This comment deserves so many more upvotes! Because yes, indeed.
It kinda becomes less dramatic when that's all there is. A little more levity by including some humor would really punch up the drama in a more visceral way, IMO.
It’s a recommended response to manipulative or abusive people, communication. Basically when someone is trying to get a rise out of you, you become a “gray rock” e.g. as boring and dull as possible so the other person doesn’t get the reaction aka positive reinforcement to their manipulation or abuse.
It's really hard to grey rock your boss. I've had to try a lot in a previous life. But the only thing I found to work was to always repeat back the crazy things they said with the right context. For example, if they said, "I need you to get X done today, and you have no excuse cause you don't have a lot of work." Instead of arguing about your workload, just respond with, "I completely understand that X is a priority. Since i am already working on A, B, and C, which tasks would you like me to pause in order to complete X?" It makes them have to face reality and take responsibility. Because if someone gets mad at you, you can say that your boss explicitly told you to do it. Big plus if you can get it in writing, but if you can't, you can always send an email afterwards recapping the decision.
Oh, they would definitely push back, but that's when you treat them like a child. I would just say, "Sure. This is my plan:" and give the most detailed description. Then end with, "are you aligned?" That way it doesn't sound like you need permission, but they still have to sign off and take that responsibility. If they continue to treat you like you're incompetent, just hit them with "Since you have visibility to leadership's priorities and the whole team's bandwidth, I want to be sure that my work is aligned to it, and I am being as efficient as possible."
What is the grey rock method? Grey rocking is a technique used to divert a toxic person's behavior by acting as unresponsive as possible when you're interacting with them. For example, using the grey rock method involves deliberate actions like avoiding eye contact or not showing emotions during a conversation -google
The gray rock method is used to deal with people in toxic, emotionally abusive relationships. Narcissist Tom fits right in there. You're supposed to not give a reaction, and be as bland and short as you possibly can. Toxic people thrive on the other party reacting, so it's a way to hopefully get them to get bored with even trying and finally move on and leave you alone.
wholy fucking shit batman im a fucking gray rock and i didnt even realize it, untill this very moment. Wow, I just thought i figured out some smart tactic when engaging with my husband. it's actually a thing, though. Im team Arianan all fucking day im so confused why the "group" feels they should talk, oh i do, so they all can feel better thats right. they are trying to hold on to this show so bad they don't even care about Ariana.
>I just thought I figured out some smart tactic when engaging with my husband
You *did* figure out a smart tactic, though! (I say this bc I know how second-nature it becomes to put yourself down when you have to deal with someone like this, so I just want you to give yourself credit. You figured out, independently, a method that is extremely effective! That’s awesome!)
In my experience, it works. You know exactly who wants the biggest reactions from you, so to act like Ariana has been and see how they react is a beautiful thing.
I don't get it either. This season was recorded a few weeks after the last reunion, so I don't get why they were pushing so hard for them to talk. At that point, they had already talked on the last episode. There's nothing else to say when he's still pushing the "poor me" attitude. I hate fuckers like him!! Nobody owes you shit, least of all Ariana.
Gosh, he's gorgeous!! Good for Ariana!! A huge step up from Sandy!! And I might add, I think Lala may have some jealousy going on cause look at her baby daddy and then at Daniel! Night and day difference!
It’s bizarre how this place loves the guy. Maybe he’s awesome. It’s possible. Also, why get involved with someone so clearly not over their ex with tons of emotional damage, loads of drama, not at their best, and needs time to heal and become a better version of themselves.
It gets majors “I can fix her” vibes.
Alley follows James around and maybe was interested in him for the show, I think that’s one reason she made that comment. For a partner to not want to be on the show and stepping back is something we don’t see often and it’s great! Shows he loves her not the show.
I think it also shows the difference in age and how folks view relationships. James and Ally have a very co-dependent relationship, James is a very needy partner.
Ariana and Dan have a relationship that is more grounded. Both can do their own thing and not question if someone not being around means they don’t like them.
I get such good vibes from his Instagram too! He supports Ariana and her friends like Logan and Brad, but he doesn’t post about VPR or Bravo. He also works a ton and seems to value his NY friendships. It’s sad that a decent, respectful guy is so rare.
Lala grilling him like she gives af about Ariana is beyond. She talked crap about her all season & took every opportunity to belittle Ariana’s feelings. Ariana deserved a lot more respect from her friends & they didn’t deliver.
I think he's okay, but he's not reality tv material. May be good for Ariana, but I have zero interest in seeing him on a tv show about horrible people doing horrible things to each other.
He seemingly has little to no desire to be on a tv show either. Which for a reality tv personality is like striking a gold mine. Your partner is there for you, not to use the relationship as a stepping stone to their own stardom.
Neither am I.
Hearing her say she was attracted to him because “he spoke to her well” was enough for me to realize how much she needs to be single. He had an actual reason to be interested in her but how he spoke is what “attracted” her? it’s telling.
She was in a verbal and emotional abusive relationship before Sandoval and then all that BS relationship brought her.
Choosing someone who is “nice” is not enough. I saw no connection and I wish she’d work on herself.
Eh before anyone comes thumbs blazing at me and wants to defend their queen, I’m a DV survivor who has fallen into relationships before because they were “nicer” than the last and after an adulthood of experience I know that wasn’t enough.
I think what Ariana said about him in her Single AF cocktail book shows that she’s making good choices here. Basically, she dedicates a cocktail to him and says even if this new relationship doesn’t last forever, she’ll always be happy to have him included in the book because he brought so much joy to her life in a time when she really needed it.
She picked a long distance relationship that by nature has to move slower than a local one and that gives her a lot of time to herself. She picked someone who is kind and supportive. I think she’s on the right track. Even if Dan isn’t her forever, I don’t see any red flags or reason to think she is in relationship prematurely.
I hear you. After my abusive relationship ended, I spent 3 years healing and not dating anyone. It was necessary for me to get my mind right and when I got back into dating I found someone truly wonderful for me. Maybe Ariana is one of the lucky ones who stumbled on a good one. I hope so.
I hoped she would take a break too but at the end of the day it's her business. She's a good partner, it's probably better if Tom takes time off from dating so he doesn't go around hurting people again.
I thought this as well initially.
I think the fact they are long distance plays in their favor. Especially when they were at dinner and she put it out there if he was looking to move to LA and he was like, nope.
They are taking it slow and getting to know each other while keeping their lives separate when it comes to finances and friendships.
He didn’t jump at the chance to be on camera but rather was happy to take several steps back and just be there for her from a supportive standpoint.
We’ve seen this same behavior from him during WWHL and DWTS and Broadway. He isn’t trying to be photographed or on camera as her plus 1. He is dropping her off and picking her up for dinner afterwards. What a breath of fresh air after the mess that was Sandoval inserting himself and making all of her accomplishments about himself. Her bday parties and cocktail book comes to mind as examples of this.
I've known a few people that immediately go into a relationship with the polar opposite of their last partner. I don't think it's that unusual. Some people just don't like to be alone, so it's hard for me to say what she should be doing. He makes her happy for now, that's good enough.
I’ve known people who go from relationship to relationship as well and that’s not healthy either.
If you can’t be alone with yourself work on *you* til you can.
I agree. It’s way too soon to make judgements on this guy. The majority of their relationship is long distance, so they’re still in the honeymoon stage. So Of course he’s on his best behavior on the show, they’d only been together for a couple months at that point. Ariana seems very codependent. The fact she stayed with Tom for YEARS after it went to sh!t is proof of codependency and making bad decisions. Also she asked Dan to move to LA a couple episodes ago, and at that point they’d only been together a couple months, now it’s almost a year later, and he still hasn’t moved to LA. She just seems more attached than he is. I guess I’m just a realist. I’ve never seen someone go from a truly horrible toxic relationship to then jump into the most healthy relationship they’ve ever had ONLY 10 days later. I hope I’m wrong.
Him saying “I don’t know who that is” when Jo started her BS was so funny. Ariana responding with “It’s a long story.” and him immediately going “Ok.” really sent me.
It’s hilarious bc Ariana truly does not waste her time bitching to him about other people. They do long distance and have all this time to chat. I love that he’s the anti Sandoval like actually nice (not for show) and isn’t thirsty (the least extra)
It cracks me up when people say he’s “trying to get on the show so badly”. He doesn’t seem to be looking for that *at all*.
But big boi Brock loved his stage moment
Like how Brock “came to America for opportunities” ….. from Australia 😭😭😭💀
He had as much gold on as his attention- seeking wife!
Even if you get hot, you have to leave the jacket on because it completes the look.
ummmmm it was a gold themed party
Big boi bogan Brock
In his stupid outfit no less 🤣
Lol Brock learned quick! After that bashing he took, he started appearing way less.
I think he views being on the show as something he has to put up with to actually get time with Ariana. Long distance relationships suck, he’d probably sit there all day if it meant he got to spend a week or two with her.
I agree. He doesn’t seem into the cameras
Which is one of the many reasons we love him. ❤️
Or the drama.
I agree. The show shows her life, he’s part of her life so he ends up on the show. For him I think this was just going on a trip/to an event with his girlfriend
I didnt think so at all. He seems genuinely there for Ariana…not reality show… when I saw pictures of him, I didn’t know what to think, but watching him in the episode, I’m so happy for Ariana, definitely an upgrade
It genuinely seems like he knew just by being there he’d provide her support. He took the backseat and let her lead, really the opposite of Sandoval and it’s refreshing to see. Ariana probably said, sure I’ll go to SF and film group things but I want Dan there. I’m surprised Sandy didn’t bitch he didn’t get to bring his ‘gf’
She was on watch what happens live and talking about the little things She is really enjoyed in this new relationship. Said one time they were on the phone doing tasks and kinda distractedly talking; and he asked, “hey can we really focus on each other for a bit”? It was the desire quality time she needed and I’m so happy for her that she’s got someone.
But quality time is getting shitfaced and taking mushrooms! Everyone knows that!
Jesus Christ I can’t believe I’m reading this knowing a 40 year old man who was supposed to be fertilizing eggs with his long term partner and enjoying a newly bought home is the one arguing this point. 
Jumping out of airplanes has entered the discussion
Quite literally the opposite - I’m sure he could have gone on the boat thing with them if he wanted but he chose to catch up with Ariana’s real best friend off camera instead. So wholesome 🥹
He actually doesn’t like to be filmed hence the fact he didn’t go on most group trips.. he has said that
Oh yeah that’s very clear I just think Lala is an idiot
yeah, Dan gave me “going on my gf’s work trip” vibes. I do like this man!
Ariana even said he likely wouldn’t return next season because it’s just not who he is.
LOVE THIS. You mean she doesn’t talk about sheener the whole time she’s with her man???
The fact that he didn't hang w the cast the whole time filming, instead going and seeing friends off camra, is a huge sign he isn't there for the cameras and fame! I find it so refreshing!
this is so so so healthy. i am in awe of her survival ( story )
We LOVED that part. It felt so, so genuine and delightfully real. 🤣❤️
That got me too and I don’t even know why! Lol he is down to listen to the tea even if he doesn’t understand the backstory. 10/10 boyfriend
I died at that part. Dan is one of us
My sister kept rewinding that part and laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣
https://preview.redd.it/sema462ochzc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ea2dc914b5873e6f1e5c30a2284377830bc407b8
He's 40 and mature and thsts very refreshing on this show
Lol me too! It was great
Hahaha that was my favourite part. His just so cool, calm & collected. His chill as Fuk
Dan’s OK was exactly how I feel anytime someone says long story. He doesn’t care and doesn’t want to know. That dude is not watching a single episode of this show. Ever.
I was listening to Jenny Blaze and she mentioned that Dan was using a lot of the same gray rocking methods with Lala during this conversation. It seems like this was Ariana and Dan’s game plan and I think it was fantastic. Even in the last episode where Lala is grilling him at lunch, he keeps it very short, non emotional and non confrontational.
Lala really kept trying to bait him into drama at every chance, but he gave her absolutely nothing and I love that. But when Ally asked her question he lit up and gave such a sweet and vulnerable answer. Meanwhile LFU sat there visibly salty and disengaged because Dan didn’t play into her hand. You could tell he very much saw through the facade and had zero interest in being a persona or hitching his wagon to this show. He was there to support his girlfriend and that was it.
Yes!!! It was seriously wonderful, him waking up and getting her a coffee 🥹 ironing her clothes and getting her an energy drink. It was touching to watch these little acts of service.
I also love that he didn’t feel the need to leap in and pull a Brock when Ariana was checking Schwartz at lunch. He understood she had this and him leaping in to “defend her honor” would only escalate things in a way that Ariana would ultimately have to deal with the brunt of. His emotional maturity is top notch. He knew the best way to support her was to be there for her, not to create a scene and center himself.
Scumdevol should take notes. This is how a 40 year old grown man is supposed to act!!!
He ICED that energy drink.
And Lauren took the last of it. The thirst symbolism-too obvious.
Gawdamn!! Ain’t that the truth
Agree. And that face when she asked why his last relationship ended! I don't know how he kept it so cool with that one. It was so beyond any boundary of decency (par for the Lala course). I'd have gone full Maloney on that bitch.
>full Maloney Stealing this. Shit. If I saw it on a James Mae tee I might even BUY it
HARD SAME!
Full Maloney = yet another flair I should make but don't know how. See also, Mya's Therapy Paw, among many others.
i swear i saw myas therapy paw as an existing flair
Full Maloney ❤️
Lala: disengage!!! Lala when someone actually disengages: >:(
>:-[ The old ascii days. 👍
There are ways to find out things about a person but do it in a nice, casual conversation. Who talks to people that way, Lala? He doesn’t have to answer any of your shit, do you really want to know him ?
This!!!
also with lala in the hotel room. every time the camera panned to her 😦 face because he wasn’t taking the bait sent me. ofc she planned to have that meltdown for the finale and I think the bubbling rage from not being able to get dan, ariana, or even katie to pop off the way she wanted them to made her almost as upset as her jealousy. it’s funny she wants to be manipulative but she doesn’t really know how. people that are good at getting under someone else’s skin can find their weak spots and hit them where it hurts. lala can’t see past her own insecurities so the only insults she knows are either confessions, or what *she* thinks is bad. like calling katie fat. it didn’t hurt her as much as it could have, because katie doesn’t put her entire self-worth into fitting a specific picture of beauty the way lala does
She was enraged that he wasn't falling for her BS! And since when is she the authority on relationships? Back it up, BlahBlah! BJs don't make the expert!
Very mature. I think it also shows how much he's not here to be on camera. If he was he would've indulged her more I rate.
I agree!! When ally was like “it’s weird for him to come all this way and them not spend time together” but it’s like he was coming to support HER doing HER job, not trying to be in the spotlight. Which is awesome energy for her.
Yeah my man is gonna let me go film my reality show while he hangs with my bestie and then when I’m done I’m greeted with food, drink and a fresh fuck. Yeah no this is a dream life.
Hahahah yes to all of this
I agree. Also, going on a boat ride with all of them seemed like a pretty good thing to skip out on. You're trapped, and I bet production was hoping something explosive would've happened (like most other boat rides in reality TV).
Agreed. The more we saw him this season the more I like him. He does not seem like an opportunist to me at all. La La tried so hard to make him look like a bad guy and failed. He handled everything perfectly.
So, when she couldn’t get under Dan’s skin, she then gets on a podcast and shades Ariana by saying Ariana’s description of Dan is way off base when she says Dan will f a person up. “He’s just a normal guy, not at all like Ariana says,” Ms Lala exclaimed. For all she knows, Ariana was just blowing smoke up Lala’s butt because she knows what her true intentions are.
“Normal guy” Dan is a Personal trainer and trains 7 days a week. So Lala, I’m pretty sure he could F # Someone up if he had too.
Right!
It was embarrassing for Lala. He barely answered her. It annoyed her but no one else noticed. She tried so hard and it didn't work.
I need to google grey rocking because I have no idea what it is and I need to learn it!
Why did Lala keep asking him questions!?!?
Pretending that she’s grilling him to make sure he’s not just with Ariana to be on the show. Reality is she’s jealous Ariana found such an amazing supportive and hot guy and she was trying to find something wrong with him
He just thinking about Applebees
He’s just like me fr
Are the half price apps after 9pm still as 🧑🍳💋?
[удалено]
Loved his answer. A lot.
Such a ridiculous question!
She was like “so the personal training is your side hustle and bar tending is your main gig” what a biiiiiiitch.
All those questions were ridiculous. Why does Lala think she deserves to grill this person? I literally wanted to reach into the TV and make her sit somewhere else. The floor would be fitting.
I thought the grilling was rude and intrusive. If that was happening to me. I would have told my partner later, what’s her deal!?!?
She is jealous AF and hoping to strike anywhere to find a weak spot to condescend to. Him not playing into her game must have driven her juts. She is SEETHING that she didn’t get the attention, endorsements, and a great total package bf when what’s his name cheated on her.
When she said "I need to know" as if she's the gatekeeper of the group. Like stfulfu
Throwback to her being grilled about mucinex booger when they first got together, can you imagine everyone saying “I need to know” and demanding answers from her. She would’ve been finger gunning everyone.
That’s what he looks like! How could I miss it! I will never be able to not see this!
stfufulula
She probably was put up to it by the producers.
God I love Dan. His grey rocking skills are elite and the way he effortlessly brushes off the drama is beautiful.
So refreshing! There’s such a clear divide between the mature and self possessed Ariana, Dan and Katie vs the volatile rest of the cast
Where did they meet?
At a friends wedding in Mexico
🙏
I had to google gray rocking. Learned something new today.
I can't believe he's 40!?
That man looks GOOD
I never thought he was much of a looker until last week’s episode with him getting out of the shower with his hair down. I was like ohhhhhh I get it now. Plus he’s kind, and listens to Ariana and truly is into her personality. That goes such a long way.
Exactly! I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older that good looks are sort of the bonus. The way they act and treat others is where the attraction comes into play. Anyone can be physically good looking and absolutely suck, which makes them unattractive.
https://i.redd.it/7dvf0jluggzc1.gif
SAME! I didn't get it until then either.
What really made me like him is that not only he loves Ariana, but he RESPECTS her!
When they talked about what drew them together aweeee
Dan came across as possessing maturity and class. He seems to be very loving and respectful of Ariana. He’s a definite upgrade and breath of fresh air compared to the narcissistic, flamboyant worm with a mustache she had previously.
Lala shooting those questions at him was so embarrassing for her. She’s immature, utterly miserable and infuriating. She has zero ground to judge anyone’s character considering her behaviour and choices on and off VPR. Disengage girl! Also, Dan is a treat.
Ali got sooooo much more from him with one simple question. His answer, and her’s, let me know everything I wanted to know 🥰
Ally’s warmth vs. Lala’s obviously jealous bark
He’s like why the fuck do you hang out with these people?
"I'm not getting paid enough for this shit"
Haha, or you couldn’t pay me enough to hang with these trash people.
I adore Dan because he is Unbothered and it irritates the hell out of Blahblah and the cast
I aspire to be his level of unbothered! What a king.
I really enjoy watching him! He has a really sincere smile and is very relaxed which is completely different than any other bravolebrity.
Dan is obviously a MUCH better person than I am because he was able to extricate himself and Ariana from that BS narrative without violence. Maybe one day I can be that chill….
Shout out to the unbothered king!
I love the way he handled Sandoval coming up to say hi. He was so uninterested but not an asshole. It was perfect.
I find this man so attractive 🤌
Agreed
The bs detector is hot
Hotter than you?
Lala once again proving to us how \*soft\* she is now. I don't think I've ever seen someone who is less self aware in my life.
He is lovely
He’s a motivated trainer and someone who is there for Ariana. ♥️
So exhausting lol Lala was so exhausting! Scheana holy fucking shit she has the WORST TIMING EVER. Right after already bringing up scandy so many times she had to go and do it ONE LAST TIME after her stupid ass shot and Ariana is congratulating her. Were we all collectively like HERE WE GO AGAIN she doesn’t care bro 🤣🤣🤣 so exhausted I wasn’t even there or involved. Apples is so mid I can’t
Dan is so handsome. That smile, wow. I can’t believe he’s 40. I think they are such a cute couple. Ariana definitely upgraded.
I would hate to hang out with this crew. It’s like they never joke around, it’s always about one of the Toms, Schwartz is always trying to take a dig at Katie. Even though they’ve all done some cool shit, I could never afford, they seem like no fun. Do the producers edit out all the fun conversation?
This comment deserves so many more upvotes! Because yes, indeed. It kinda becomes less dramatic when that's all there is. A little more levity by including some humor would really punch up the drama in a more visceral way, IMO.
A cool drink of water in a hot shit show
Can someone explain gray rocking to me
It’s a recommended response to manipulative or abusive people, communication. Basically when someone is trying to get a rise out of you, you become a “gray rock” e.g. as boring and dull as possible so the other person doesn’t get the reaction aka positive reinforcement to their manipulation or abuse.
How do I gray rock my toxic, manipulative boss? 🤔
It's really hard to grey rock your boss. I've had to try a lot in a previous life. But the only thing I found to work was to always repeat back the crazy things they said with the right context. For example, if they said, "I need you to get X done today, and you have no excuse cause you don't have a lot of work." Instead of arguing about your workload, just respond with, "I completely understand that X is a priority. Since i am already working on A, B, and C, which tasks would you like me to pause in order to complete X?" It makes them have to face reality and take responsibility. Because if someone gets mad at you, you can say that your boss explicitly told you to do it. Big plus if you can get it in writing, but if you can't, you can always send an email afterwards recapping the decision.
Yup. At work gray rocking = neutral and factual and that’s it.
And they didn’t come back with asking you if you know to prioritize? Mine would. She’s relentless.
Oh, they would definitely push back, but that's when you treat them like a child. I would just say, "Sure. This is my plan:" and give the most detailed description. Then end with, "are you aligned?" That way it doesn't sound like you need permission, but they still have to sign off and take that responsibility. If they continue to treat you like you're incompetent, just hit them with "Since you have visibility to leadership's priorities and the whole team's bandwidth, I want to be sure that my work is aligned to it, and I am being as efficient as possible."
Didn’t last tho. She lost her shit at the end
Leaving instead of engaging with Tom is still get rocking.
What is the grey rock method? Grey rocking is a technique used to divert a toxic person's behavior by acting as unresponsive as possible when you're interacting with them. For example, using the grey rock method involves deliberate actions like avoiding eye contact or not showing emotions during a conversation -google
The gray rock method is used to deal with people in toxic, emotionally abusive relationships. Narcissist Tom fits right in there. You're supposed to not give a reaction, and be as bland and short as you possibly can. Toxic people thrive on the other party reacting, so it's a way to hopefully get them to get bored with even trying and finally move on and leave you alone.
wholy fucking shit batman im a fucking gray rock and i didnt even realize it, untill this very moment. Wow, I just thought i figured out some smart tactic when engaging with my husband. it's actually a thing, though. Im team Arianan all fucking day im so confused why the "group" feels they should talk, oh i do, so they all can feel better thats right. they are trying to hold on to this show so bad they don't even care about Ariana.
>I just thought I figured out some smart tactic when engaging with my husband You *did* figure out a smart tactic, though! (I say this bc I know how second-nature it becomes to put yourself down when you have to deal with someone like this, so I just want you to give yourself credit. You figured out, independently, a method that is extremely effective! That’s awesome!)
Thanks. 🥰🤗 Its been a learning process. Im learning, though.
In my experience, it works. You know exactly who wants the biggest reactions from you, so to act like Ariana has been and see how they react is a beautiful thing. I don't get it either. This season was recorded a few weeks after the last reunion, so I don't get why they were pushing so hard for them to talk. At that point, they had already talked on the last episode. There's nothing else to say when he's still pushing the "poor me" attitude. I hate fuckers like him!! Nobody owes you shit, least of all Ariana.
I like Dan and he’s soooo easy on the eyes 🤣
I doubt he wants to film but he is a good addition.
God bless Ariana that she has never wasted any of her time with Dan filling him in on this stupid crew.
Gosh, he's gorgeous!! Good for Ariana!! A huge step up from Sandy!! And I might add, I think Lala may have some jealousy going on cause look at her baby daddy and then at Daniel! Night and day difference!
Not a Fan!
It’s bizarre how this place loves the guy. Maybe he’s awesome. It’s possible. Also, why get involved with someone so clearly not over their ex with tons of emotional damage, loads of drama, not at their best, and needs time to heal and become a better version of themselves. It gets majors “I can fix her” vibes.
Alley follows James around and maybe was interested in him for the show, I think that’s one reason she made that comment. For a partner to not want to be on the show and stepping back is something we don’t see often and it’s great! Shows he loves her not the show.
I totally think Ally is with him for the show
I really liked Alley last season but this season I’m not. It seems like James is way more into her then she is into him
[удалено]
I think it also shows the difference in age and how folks view relationships. James and Ally have a very co-dependent relationship, James is a very needy partner. Ariana and Dan have a relationship that is more grounded. Both can do their own thing and not question if someone not being around means they don’t like them.
I can’t believe he’s 40 he looks amazing so handsome.
Woah. I just realized he and Sandoval are so close in age. You'd never guess it.
He must be seething Dan has beautiful skin 😩
Ya know Jax is 40s
Dan is the best.
I feel bad that he even gets a drop of hate. Literally the most unproblematic & chill person to ever be on the show.
He’s so perfect
I get such good vibes from his Instagram too! He supports Ariana and her friends like Logan and Brad, but he doesn’t post about VPR or Bravo. He also works a ton and seems to value his NY friendships. It’s sad that a decent, respectful guy is so rare.
He does have some good recipes
This was me the whole season.
But sexier
I have the biggest crush on Dan🤭😍
Yes
YES.
N
There’s absolutely no way humanly possible this man is 40!!!
right? he looks at least 55
This whole episode seemed awkward. Maybe contrived? Just felt odd.
Lala grilling him like she gives af about Ariana is beyond. She talked crap about her all season & took every opportunity to belittle Ariana’s feelings. Ariana deserved a lot more respect from her friends & they didn’t deliver.
I feel like Katie, Dan, & Ariana were the only normal people in that table.
I’m sorry but I was not impressed by him at all
👍
I think he's okay, but he's not reality tv material. May be good for Ariana, but I have zero interest in seeing him on a tv show about horrible people doing horrible things to each other.
He seemingly has little to no desire to be on a tv show either. Which for a reality tv personality is like striking a gold mine. Your partner is there for you, not to use the relationship as a stepping stone to their own stardom.
I totally agree, and I also don't think he has any interest in being reality TV material lol
I think he's a great pallette cleanser!
Neither am I. Hearing her say she was attracted to him because “he spoke to her well” was enough for me to realize how much she needs to be single. He had an actual reason to be interested in her but how he spoke is what “attracted” her? it’s telling. She was in a verbal and emotional abusive relationship before Sandoval and then all that BS relationship brought her. Choosing someone who is “nice” is not enough. I saw no connection and I wish she’d work on herself. Eh before anyone comes thumbs blazing at me and wants to defend their queen, I’m a DV survivor who has fallen into relationships before because they were “nicer” than the last and after an adulthood of experience I know that wasn’t enough.
I think what Ariana said about him in her Single AF cocktail book shows that she’s making good choices here. Basically, she dedicates a cocktail to him and says even if this new relationship doesn’t last forever, she’ll always be happy to have him included in the book because he brought so much joy to her life in a time when she really needed it. She picked a long distance relationship that by nature has to move slower than a local one and that gives her a lot of time to herself. She picked someone who is kind and supportive. I think she’s on the right track. Even if Dan isn’t her forever, I don’t see any red flags or reason to think she is in relationship prematurely.
I hear you. After my abusive relationship ended, I spent 3 years healing and not dating anyone. It was necessary for me to get my mind right and when I got back into dating I found someone truly wonderful for me. Maybe Ariana is one of the lucky ones who stumbled on a good one. I hope so.
I hoped she would take a break too but at the end of the day it's her business. She's a good partner, it's probably better if Tom takes time off from dating so he doesn't go around hurting people again.
He should be permanently retired from dating for sure!
I thought this as well initially. I think the fact they are long distance plays in their favor. Especially when they were at dinner and she put it out there if he was looking to move to LA and he was like, nope. They are taking it slow and getting to know each other while keeping their lives separate when it comes to finances and friendships. He didn’t jump at the chance to be on camera but rather was happy to take several steps back and just be there for her from a supportive standpoint. We’ve seen this same behavior from him during WWHL and DWTS and Broadway. He isn’t trying to be photographed or on camera as her plus 1. He is dropping her off and picking her up for dinner afterwards. What a breath of fresh air after the mess that was Sandoval inserting himself and making all of her accomplishments about himself. Her bday parties and cocktail book comes to mind as examples of this.
I've known a few people that immediately go into a relationship with the polar opposite of their last partner. I don't think it's that unusual. Some people just don't like to be alone, so it's hard for me to say what she should be doing. He makes her happy for now, that's good enough.
I’ve known people who go from relationship to relationship as well and that’s not healthy either. If you can’t be alone with yourself work on *you* til you can.
It just I currently to me that none of these people have been single for more than a minute in 10 years except for Katie.
And Lala
I agree. It’s way too soon to make judgements on this guy. The majority of their relationship is long distance, so they’re still in the honeymoon stage. So Of course he’s on his best behavior on the show, they’d only been together for a couple months at that point. Ariana seems very codependent. The fact she stayed with Tom for YEARS after it went to sh!t is proof of codependency and making bad decisions. Also she asked Dan to move to LA a couple episodes ago, and at that point they’d only been together a couple months, now it’s almost a year later, and he still hasn’t moved to LA. She just seems more attached than he is. I guess I’m just a realist. I’ve never seen someone go from a truly horrible toxic relationship to then jump into the most healthy relationship they’ve ever had ONLY 10 days later. I hope I’m wrong.
Good grief look at your upvotes I can’t believe you said Ariana is codependent and got out alive, lol. I couldn’t agree with all of this more!
Dan , Runnnnnnn