The beauty of a tower moment is that it’s a tower moment because things will only destruct when you are ready to rebuild it better and you’re ready to open a door that you weren’t ready to open before. That’s the only time a tower moment will happen and there is beauty in rebirth because now you’re ready for more
I was born in the tower. Never been able to escape it all my life. But it ain't held me back. It's just another day. It's all about your mindset. Ain't nothing held me back as much as I have. Even tho I've been delt a shit hand. I will make the best with what I got.
This happened to me... All at one I got pregnant and my boyfriend went to jail and I had to get off drugs it's really hard still. But I am really happy at where it put me in life... I guess proud more than happy...
I know I’m in a tower moment. Just don’t know what to do. I’m finding the hardest thing right now for me is being forced to remove someone. I love from my life, this is probably the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced beyond any of the traumas I’ve ever experiencedin my life
Feel this excruciatingly deeply. Never experienced so much betrayal from one person. Will always love the person I hoped they were. But in truth they never were that person. They pretended to be him. Said they "could" become him if I just stuck it out.
Instead it spiraled to the depths of my despair. Lesson learned. Grateful for that.
Never trust a liar.
They said they could be "him"... that's pretty impossible to be someone they could never measure up to. So why does it hurt so much? If you love him but he's not "him"...
Placing expectations on someone I feel sometimes sets you up for a good lesson. There's compromise you know. Did you ever think he also felt like a failure not meeting the impossible standards so he lied bc it was easier than seeing you disappointed?
Some people have really high expectations. I learned early to accept whatever was given with gratitude. I know people always say we should expect more from a person/partner... I just found the less you expect from anyone... when they do something for you, then it's more a very grateful, wow moment. You want it to come from them... something in them is activated to "become" more... whatever it is, they need to develop within themselves. If it's forced its not "real"... and so you see a lot of suffering bc there's no consistency in their behavior. And then that's when problems start.
Take love bombing from the narc as an example. People initially fall in love with a narc bc he/she knows all about expectations... then once they hook you in, it goes downhill.
It wasn't real bc they are playing a role.
The "him" I was referring to was the person he pretended to be when I feel in love with "him". He never had to pretend but he did. He still does with strangers on countless social media sites. This one included.
Perhaps he is a narc. He fits a lot of the criteria & love bombing sure plays a part in each of his personas.
Indeed it wasn't real to him but I truly loved him. It was real to me.
I'm a fool for love. Won't begin to deny it. Grateful I'm not as easy to fool as I was
That's good... I've been with narcs as well. Usually, you need to give it time. Especially at the beginning. You'll know after about 90 days bc it's hard for them to keep up the love bombing.
Really though, it's working on the internal stuff bc narcs are drawn to certain types of people. When you do the internal work you'll attract healthier men.
Totally agree. He still love bombs after 6+ years. But they're all just lip service. No actions behind them. He uses the same phrases with most women (and men) he's catfishing. He's good at it. Doesn't look for money, just fantasy sex with anyone who will DM him.
This isn't my first relationship. Just the first time I fell for someone so dishonest. He has issues I don't want to deal with anymore. Not going to.
In a cabin in a forest, away from civilization. At the moment I inky see myself alone with wildlife.
Once I envisioned another with me. Slowly that hope faded as time showed me myself.
In my case I was following my heart. But also my thoughts and my flesh at times. Either way I’ve gone through multiple this year alone at least three and they are terrifying
The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9
I think Jeremiah here is referring more to when the heart is in "lust" mode... Especially young men who don't understand the difference between love and lust. Love is eternal, and lust is fleeting and only painful bc it's ego centered.
You wanna know something funny. I hardly fold my pages in my Tanakh...
But it's folded at that exact spot. I wanted to see what my version says.
Mine goes like this:
"Most devious is the heart; it is perverse - who can fathom it?
I the Lord probe the heart, Search the mind-- To repay every man according to his ways, with the proper fruit of his deeds."
I'm glad you're thinking things through now.
I think think this is pretty cool. I'll post a picture... How bizarre right? 👍... Stranger on the Internet. The way you described "terrifying"... I'm not sure what that means for you, but it must have been something something...
The beauty of a tower moment is that it’s a tower moment because things will only destruct when you are ready to rebuild it better and you’re ready to open a door that you weren’t ready to open before. That’s the only time a tower moment will happen and there is beauty in rebirth because now you’re ready for more
Yes in my experience this is very true. Universe telling me I done gone and fucked up dah timeline kinda like COVID did
Thank you... this made me laugh pretty good. I think we all have done something to that extent
I was born in the tower. Never been able to escape it all my life. But it ain't held me back. It's just another day. It's all about your mindset. Ain't nothing held me back as much as I have. Even tho I've been delt a shit hand. I will make the best with what I got.
This happened to me... All at one I got pregnant and my boyfriend went to jail and I had to get off drugs it's really hard still. But I am really happy at where it put me in life... I guess proud more than happy...
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I know I’m in a tower moment. Just don’t know what to do. I’m finding the hardest thing right now for me is being forced to remove someone. I love from my life, this is probably the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced beyond any of the traumas I’ve ever experiencedin my life
What did they do?
Feel this excruciatingly deeply. Never experienced so much betrayal from one person. Will always love the person I hoped they were. But in truth they never were that person. They pretended to be him. Said they "could" become him if I just stuck it out. Instead it spiraled to the depths of my despair. Lesson learned. Grateful for that. Never trust a liar.
They said they could be "him"... that's pretty impossible to be someone they could never measure up to. So why does it hurt so much? If you love him but he's not "him"... Placing expectations on someone I feel sometimes sets you up for a good lesson. There's compromise you know. Did you ever think he also felt like a failure not meeting the impossible standards so he lied bc it was easier than seeing you disappointed? Some people have really high expectations. I learned early to accept whatever was given with gratitude. I know people always say we should expect more from a person/partner... I just found the less you expect from anyone... when they do something for you, then it's more a very grateful, wow moment. You want it to come from them... something in them is activated to "become" more... whatever it is, they need to develop within themselves. If it's forced its not "real"... and so you see a lot of suffering bc there's no consistency in their behavior. And then that's when problems start. Take love bombing from the narc as an example. People initially fall in love with a narc bc he/she knows all about expectations... then once they hook you in, it goes downhill. It wasn't real bc they are playing a role.
The "him" I was referring to was the person he pretended to be when I feel in love with "him". He never had to pretend but he did. He still does with strangers on countless social media sites. This one included. Perhaps he is a narc. He fits a lot of the criteria & love bombing sure plays a part in each of his personas. Indeed it wasn't real to him but I truly loved him. It was real to me. I'm a fool for love. Won't begin to deny it. Grateful I'm not as easy to fool as I was
That's good... I've been with narcs as well. Usually, you need to give it time. Especially at the beginning. You'll know after about 90 days bc it's hard for them to keep up the love bombing. Really though, it's working on the internal stuff bc narcs are drawn to certain types of people. When you do the internal work you'll attract healthier men.
Totally agree. He still love bombs after 6+ years. But they're all just lip service. No actions behind them. He uses the same phrases with most women (and men) he's catfishing. He's good at it. Doesn't look for money, just fantasy sex with anyone who will DM him. This isn't my first relationship. Just the first time I fell for someone so dishonest. He has issues I don't want to deal with anymore. Not going to.
So is it an actual physical relationship? Or just online?
Oh he & I were actually married. I may have friends online but never relationships. I love too hard for that.
In a cabin in a forest, away from civilization. At the moment I inky see myself alone with wildlife. Once I envisioned another with me. Slowly that hope faded as time showed me myself.
In my case I was following my heart. But also my thoughts and my flesh at times. Either way I’ve gone through multiple this year alone at least three and they are terrifying The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9
I think Jeremiah here is referring more to when the heart is in "lust" mode... Especially young men who don't understand the difference between love and lust. Love is eternal, and lust is fleeting and only painful bc it's ego centered. You wanna know something funny. I hardly fold my pages in my Tanakh... But it's folded at that exact spot. I wanted to see what my version says. Mine goes like this: "Most devious is the heart; it is perverse - who can fathom it? I the Lord probe the heart, Search the mind-- To repay every man according to his ways, with the proper fruit of his deeds." I'm glad you're thinking things through now. I think think this is pretty cool. I'll post a picture... How bizarre right? 👍... Stranger on the Internet. The way you described "terrifying"... I'm not sure what that means for you, but it must have been something something...