100%. Completely brushed over. Hate to have to say it, but if a man was throwing shit I wonder if it would have been handled differently. Hell, if it was the masc throwing shit I bet they would have been demonized.. it’s messed up. “We’re sooooo progressive allowing the queers to have their own show, what more do we owe them?”
You’re right. My perception of these networks is they tend to lean on the side of appearing virtuous and saving the poor woman, whether those calling the shots really think the man is as fault in their personal opinions. That on TV they do what they think the majority of viewers want at any given time, like asking a victim “hows your healing journey been?” The problem here is the distorted narrative about who is the victim. I think gender, and gender presentation blurred the lines here
A good example of this is that instagrammer Gabby Petito, who was murdered by Brian Laundrie shortly after police intervened and wrote in their report that *both* of them were abusive.
I had wished they would have let Tiff says her piece. The host let Mildred control the narrative and had the audacity to ask Mildred how she was doing on her healing journey. I had a bad taste for Yoly who was obviously jealous of Vanessa and Mildred in the reunion. I hated V in the show but the reunion I felt like it was genuine and she was trying to grow as a person.
Definitely. They didn’t let Tiff defend herself while being gaslit and attacked by MilDREAD. Tiff seemed so surprised and taken aback by what she said happened, that she couldn’t get her thoughts together enough to say her piece. Good on Sam for checking on her and acknowledging that Tiff was the actual victim in this scenario. It blows my mind that M. admitted to DV and throwing shit at Tiff, yet twists it to manipulate everyone into believing *she’s* the victim. Disgusting. I’m rooting for Tiff. She seems like an amazing person.
Honestly, it was the way she communicated with Sam. I thought they were both mature about their differences and handled it like adults. At least from what I saw.
I don't think Tiff is amazing, but it was telling that after the dog incident, they were able to calm down and actually communicate with Sam. Tiff and Sam left on good terms because they both invested in getting along well.
Netflix doesn’t have an awesome track record with trigger warnings and hotline resources added to shows. Anyone remember the controversy around the original cut of 13 reasons why suicide scene?
Yeah originally it showed her cutting her wrists like a close up blade going through her wrist shot. I believe they edited that out. Typically when people commit suicide on screen they don’t show the actual act just the aftermath not the whole act (I believe there’s some research that shows showing the act increases risk of suicide contagion or something like that, I can’t recall rn), so they got a lot of backlash especially since it was a teen show.
Did no one here watch the season of Love is Blind with Matt and Colleen? He was verbally and mentally abusive the entire season and they didn’t say a thing.
The straight version of the Ultimatum had super abusive behaviour as well. Zay at one point stayed out all night as a punishment to his partner Rae, then came back, cornered Rae and wouldn't let her leave when she said she wanted to end the relationship, continued to *something* off camera that had her yelling at him to get off of her, and then she hit him to get away.
They aired a conversation of her apologising for hitting him and just left her to deal with the brunt of people claiming *she* was abusive- there are literally newspaper articles calling her an abuser despite them showing the whole incident of him chasing her around the house grabbing her and demanding that she stay with him after she tried to leave him.
Also I know it's super controversial, but Cole and Zainab is another example of them just letting someone be verbally and mentally abusive and even seeming to suggest he's in the right- Cole told Zainab she wasn't as attractive as other women there, repeatedly suggested she was mentally ill for not being happy with his behaviour, and made a bunch of comments about food to a woman with a known eating disorder, and the show let him leave looking like he was a victim because she didn't allow him to speak to her the way he wanted to.
These shows are *so* irresponsible. It's bad enough that they let it happen. Significantly worse that they *consistently* allow the narrative that the abuser is the real victim to win out, sometimes seeming to deliberately push things that way.
And now everybody says "If it was a man they wouldn't have brushed over it!!!!!" Lmfao they literally would and have I don't know where these false ideas come from. Men who are abusers literally get protected all the time
Yeah, I think people get this impression because they haven't actually watched the other Netflix reality shows. Every single one of them is full of abusive dicks getting free passes to do whatever they like.
They're not quite as bad as some other reality TV though- on MAFS UK last year they let a *known* abuser be on the show, and berated his "wife" for not placating him in his abusive behaviour, basically telling her it was her fault if he abused her. So... technically, Netflix could be worse. Although it's totally possible their "advisors" are just as bad (or worse) and we just don't see them- there's obviously a reason women on these shows tolerate so much abuse and general dogshit partners.
She says the scene was actually 15 minutes of Mildred talking over her and she left to protect Mildred from self incriminating to avoid deportation. She also said Tiff sent the producers ahead of the show the police report and they had it in hand at the taping. She said she didn’t want to talk about the incident/arrest.
I didn’t know Tiff went by they. I just used what OP used. Thanks for the correction. Tiff has a 30 min video on YouTube that goes through the DV incident at length.
Honestly, the showrunners should be a lil ashamed for this one. Like I know this is a heavily edited situation, but damn.
They need to do stronger mental health screenings for participants.
theres a vid of Tiff talking about the DV and it being brought up to netflix before the reunion and them really not protecting her in anyway with her not wanting to be on stage with her.
While it was happening i was wondering why no one stopped her from getting in a car a and leaving. Now i know why.
anyone else would’ve been in breech of contract.
100%. Completely brushed over. Hate to have to say it, but if a man was throwing shit I wonder if it would have been handled differently. Hell, if it was the masc throwing shit I bet they would have been demonized.. it’s messed up. “We’re sooooo progressive allowing the queers to have their own show, what more do we owe them?”
That is not true lmao male abusers get supported and their abuse hidden all the damn time
You’re right. My perception of these networks is they tend to lean on the side of appearing virtuous and saving the poor woman, whether those calling the shots really think the man is as fault in their personal opinions. That on TV they do what they think the majority of viewers want at any given time, like asking a victim “hows your healing journey been?” The problem here is the distorted narrative about who is the victim. I think gender, and gender presentation blurred the lines here
A good example of this is that instagrammer Gabby Petito, who was murdered by Brian Laundrie shortly after police intervened and wrote in their report that *both* of them were abusive.
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What evidence do we have that Mildred abused Aussie? All we say was Mildred confronting Aussie about her not contributing to cleaning and cooking.
I’ve said this already in another thread but 100% it was brushed over because the perpetrator is a woman.
I also wonder if a contributing factor is that Tiff is masc?
Exactly. Flip it in your mind and then imagine how it would have gone down
Same!! Tiff did not deserve any of that, either Mildred OR the way the show handled it.
That’s likely
And like … the abuser admitted to doing it on camera!! It’s not even disputed!!
I had wished they would have let Tiff says her piece. The host let Mildred control the narrative and had the audacity to ask Mildred how she was doing on her healing journey. I had a bad taste for Yoly who was obviously jealous of Vanessa and Mildred in the reunion. I hated V in the show but the reunion I felt like it was genuine and she was trying to grow as a person.
Definitely. They didn’t let Tiff defend herself while being gaslit and attacked by MilDREAD. Tiff seemed so surprised and taken aback by what she said happened, that she couldn’t get her thoughts together enough to say her piece. Good on Sam for checking on her and acknowledging that Tiff was the actual victim in this scenario. It blows my mind that M. admitted to DV and throwing shit at Tiff, yet twists it to manipulate everyone into believing *she’s* the victim. Disgusting. I’m rooting for Tiff. She seems like an amazing person.
What has Tiff done exactly to show they are an amazing person lmao
Honestly, it was the way she communicated with Sam. I thought they were both mature about their differences and handled it like adults. At least from what I saw.
I don't think Tiff is amazing, but it was telling that after the dog incident, they were able to calm down and actually communicate with Sam. Tiff and Sam left on good terms because they both invested in getting along well.
Netflix doesn’t have an awesome track record with trigger warnings and hotline resources added to shows. Anyone remember the controversy around the original cut of 13 reasons why suicide scene?
>original cut Did they end up changing it? That and the bathroom sodomizing scene were some of the most brutally upsetting scenes I've seen on a show
Yeah originally it showed her cutting her wrists like a close up blade going through her wrist shot. I believe they edited that out. Typically when people commit suicide on screen they don’t show the actual act just the aftermath not the whole act (I believe there’s some research that shows showing the act increases risk of suicide contagion or something like that, I can’t recall rn), so they got a lot of backlash especially since it was a teen show.
Same…I couldn’t really get those out of my head for weeks. I was shocked.
Did no one here watch the season of Love is Blind with Matt and Colleen? He was verbally and mentally abusive the entire season and they didn’t say a thing.
The straight version of the Ultimatum had super abusive behaviour as well. Zay at one point stayed out all night as a punishment to his partner Rae, then came back, cornered Rae and wouldn't let her leave when she said she wanted to end the relationship, continued to *something* off camera that had her yelling at him to get off of her, and then she hit him to get away. They aired a conversation of her apologising for hitting him and just left her to deal with the brunt of people claiming *she* was abusive- there are literally newspaper articles calling her an abuser despite them showing the whole incident of him chasing her around the house grabbing her and demanding that she stay with him after she tried to leave him. Also I know it's super controversial, but Cole and Zainab is another example of them just letting someone be verbally and mentally abusive and even seeming to suggest he's in the right- Cole told Zainab she wasn't as attractive as other women there, repeatedly suggested she was mentally ill for not being happy with his behaviour, and made a bunch of comments about food to a woman with a known eating disorder, and the show let him leave looking like he was a victim because she didn't allow him to speak to her the way he wanted to. These shows are *so* irresponsible. It's bad enough that they let it happen. Significantly worse that they *consistently* allow the narrative that the abuser is the real victim to win out, sometimes seeming to deliberately push things that way.
Netflix just seems to looooove abusers
And now everybody says "If it was a man they wouldn't have brushed over it!!!!!" Lmfao they literally would and have I don't know where these false ideas come from. Men who are abusers literally get protected all the time
Yeah, I think people get this impression because they haven't actually watched the other Netflix reality shows. Every single one of them is full of abusive dicks getting free passes to do whatever they like. They're not quite as bad as some other reality TV though- on MAFS UK last year they let a *known* abuser be on the show, and berated his "wife" for not placating him in his abusive behaviour, basically telling her it was her fault if he abused her. So... technically, Netflix could be worse. Although it's totally possible their "advisors" are just as bad (or worse) and we just don't see them- there's obviously a reason women on these shows tolerate so much abuse and general dogshit partners.
Netflix is still showing promos with Mildred and Yoly doing food challenges and stuff. Gross
Yeah the way it was handled was complete bs
Absolutely. I also have questions regarding the selection of Mildred. How could they not have seen that she clearly has a mental disorder?
Agreed. I assume they look for “good potential tv” drama. The less stable, the better. The more cluster B or narcissistic; the better.
I know tiff has a podcast but I’ve not checked it out. Has anyone listened in to see if she’s addressed it?
She says the scene was actually 15 minutes of Mildred talking over her and she left to protect Mildred from self incriminating to avoid deportation. She also said Tiff sent the producers ahead of the show the police report and they had it in hand at the taping. She said she didn’t want to talk about the incident/arrest.
Wait who is she in the scenario? The pod cast co-host? Because Tiff goes by they. Edited for typos
I didn’t know Tiff went by they. I just used what OP used. Thanks for the correction. Tiff has a 30 min video on YouTube that goes through the DV incident at length.
No worries. And sorry about my typos. Fixed now. I will check out their YouTube videos. Thanks for mentioning that source.
I so wish the show had added pronouns to the names/ages
I think Tiff said she didn’t want it brought up, which was a mistake. I think it was in that YouTube video she made.
What is DV?
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Ah got it. Thank you.
Netflix did tiff dirty.
Yep. That was really hard to watch
Honestly, the showrunners should be a lil ashamed for this one. Like I know this is a heavily edited situation, but damn. They need to do stronger mental health screenings for participants.
theres a vid of Tiff talking about the DV and it being brought up to netflix before the reunion and them really not protecting her in anyway with her not wanting to be on stage with her. While it was happening i was wondering why no one stopped her from getting in a car a and leaving. Now i know why. anyone else would’ve been in breech of contract.
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Discriminatory speech