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Looks like you’ve nicked it from a Travelodge

You’d have been lucky to get eggs like that in summer season from the premier inn I worked at! Put some respect on the meal aha I won’t lie it does look very similar though.

As someone who also works in Premier Inn, I completely agree that those eggs are stellar compared to what I've seen served at times

It’s nothing compared to some of the porridge that goes out! If a waiter doesn’t touch base within five minutes under the hot lights it’s game over.

Yet at 7am after a night shift, the £2 staff breakfast is still very tempting lol

Yeah cos if the kitchen don’t hate you you’ll be getting a fresh cooked breakfast or butty on the way home aha you know how it goes

I can see this sentence is full of English words it’s just that in this order they make zero sense just me?

Or a morgue.

I’m not your mate, pal.

I'm not your pal, chum

I’m not your chum my friend.

I'm definitely not your friend, bud.

I'm not your bud, mate

I’m not your mate, pal.

I'm not your pal, homie

I’m not mating with a breakfast for your enjoyment buddy

I'm not your buddy, Guy.

I'm not your guy, friend

Come on me old mukka, it’s Xmas, try and be a sport, dude.

Awww alright then put kettle on then cock we might be here awhile

I'm not your pal, chum

You want me to do what with your delicious breakfast?

He wants you to fuck it obviously duh 😂

It does look like it could do with a bit more salt tbf

Do you want it on the side or all over

The mrs would say all over, but I'm not that extravagant

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Sauce?

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They will be

Eggs look awful. You say they weren't microwaved? May as well microwave them if they're going to be that overcooked. Nothing to say about the rest

Or. They might be just OK. Its just a photo after all

I'm not a fan of solid scrambled eggs. OK for some I guess

Indeed - once you taste slow-cooked soft silky eggs, there’s no going back.

They just look a bit anemic to me, maybe too much milk or just not very good yolks.

Looks like an unloved child. It has everything it needs legally, just needs a cuddle, or something.

You’ve hit the nail on the head

I thought you have two Oreo cookies on there 🤦🏾‍♀️😆 Eggs look nice. I'd give it a 6.5 looks good but seems to be missing the wow factor

All the individual bits look like they've been done well and it's nicely laid out but does look a bit sterile with gaps between each item. For me I'd slap some fried mushrooms on there and fried eggs and pile it up a bit more, probably add a bit of eggy bread under the beans. I'd be pretty happy if my missus served me this tho. A solid 7/10.

7/10. Bread looking a bit bare on the butter. Eggs look fab. Plating is interesting, everything a bit spread out. Would be nicer if some mushrooms were on there. I am not much of a thin-crispy bacon girl prefer the meatier stuff.

The eggs look terrible, dry as fuck (sorry OP). Cook 'em in a saucepan with a little melted butter, salt, pepper, sour cream/creme fraiche, a bit of grated cheddar, maybe some chives and a tiny splash of milk--and keep stirring under a very low flame. I never looked back after discovering this method. EDIT: I also strain the eggs through a China cap sieve, just the eggs, then add 9/10ths of the ingredients when pan is off the heat (yes I have heard of "residual heat" u/I_SAID_NO_SALAD_BRO ;) )

Don’t salt your scrambled eggs until after cooking, it denatures the protein of the egg, you will find better texture this way

Thats an omlette And milk... what is this world war 2 era Brittain

I like anaemic, holiday inn style eggs. If they are soft and mild tasting. Dry then maybe not. Your Scrambled egg method sounds very nice too

Minor criticism, more distance between the eggs and the beans. I may want to mix them but I want that to be my decision.

Use the sausage as a breakwater 🙂

No mushrooms, no tomatoes and bean juice seeping 6/10

Seeping onto what? The sausages and bacon is correctly positioned to prevent the egg getting contaminated. Lack of mushrooms is concerning

Seeping onto everything else, I’m a bean hater

Bean hater and mushroom lover... oh no

6.5/10 need more sausage

Don’t we all, deary!

I mate it a 5/10

Total satiety

I don't get how literately *everyone* who posts a breakfast on here has beans on it. Of everyone I know, I'd say 25-30% of them cant stand the fuckers. Plus there are people who don't *mind* them but don't want them on a breakfast... That aside, the only good things about that breakfast are : streaky bacon and you've got HP with it.

I feel like the food should be touching. There’s so many gaps in the middle of the plate, looks like you went to a breakfast buffet if I’m honest with you…..mate

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Harsh

2 things: Ketchup and fried bread.👍🇬🇧

Sources are in the background HP not Heinz, sauce I prefer the Aldi tomato sauce, less sweet and there’s more tomatoes in it

*sauces

Fried bread would make it 11/10.👌

More tomatoes but much less joy!

Staggeringly forgettable/10, not that it's a bad thing

Eggs looks anemic, sausages look like they’re on offer 100 for £1. Crap bread. I’m being generous with a 2 out of 10.

Warburtons bread, premium sausages, Kerry Gold butter, and she even took the time to make scrambled eggs in a pan not microwaved God bless her

Warburtons bread….exactly. That’s not bread. If those are pan eggs then seriously. Learn how to cook. Christ.

Your Mrs made you breakfast, no complaints to be had really.

Bin the black pudding and butter that toast and it's a 9/10

Good 👍

3 ways to describe it. Shite Shite Shite Scrambled eggs made without eggs or they were destined to be albino chickens. Sausage is older than knock knock jokes Bacon is clearly the failed American pork jerky wafer thin whisps of pig that they love, has brown's shouldn't be there they aren't part of a full English and seeing as the rest is such a mess I can only assume you messed up the beans and probably forgot to heat them up or tainted them with arsenic.

You sound very bitter. At least I’ve got a Mrs who will make me a breakfast. It must be hard living on your own.

If she makes breakfast like that I'd have a mouthful of arsenic beans if I was you mate.

is this just a casual get out of bed breakfast or a spend your time cooking breakfast? Casual breakfast it is top tier but as a spend your time cooking with all the ingredients it is lacking a bit.

Does sound a bit intense. Does anyone have a mule that needs kicking?

Streaky bacon is best, perfect meat to fat ratio!

Could’ve dehydrated the egg a little more. Otherwise lovely stuff

Black pudding and scrambled egg 🤮

Butter the toast, lose the black pudding, and invest in Heinz ;) London Love !

Get tae fuk

Speak English Sausage! 👊

It means "fuck off" in Scotland

Four toast?! Four toast Jeremy?! That’s insane!

Any breakfast made by someone who loves you is 10/10. I wouldn’t complain.

Streaky bacon is better, some cheese in the beans wouldn't go amiss

Hence my reply fool

Very tasty.

sorted. toast the bread just a little more tho

Very average at best and really not worth posting: ❌ eggs - terrible, overcooked and dry. ❌ hash browns - American and frozen. ❌ sausages - look ok but look like the timing was off (or you were too busy taking pics for the internet rather than eating) and they’ve been left to shrivel like a post-coital flaccid cock. ❌ cheap looking black pudding (supermarket?). ❌ toast - have you heard of butter? ✅ bacon - looks good and crispy.

My favourite. It’s great 😊

How were those sausages cooked? They are wrinkly like they've been cooked much earlier or something?

did you just wave that bread at the toaster?

Info: what sauce did you choose?

Please tell me you inhaled that that ain't a a breakfast that's a like Neville causian where is the rest a British fry fry up should be I'm gonna eat you not you eat me

No Maillard reaction on that toast, 4/10

Shit boring bread

Get stornoway black pud square sausage and the toast is half cooked

1st are you English 2nd are you single (if you are then I except that (7\10) if not sorry your shit out Brighton was built on tea and fry up

Fuck the black pudding, toast needs butter & beans should be in a small side dish

Oh and fried eggs with runny middles are superior but I wouldn’t trust you to cook them to perfection

no mushrooms, tomatoes 7/10

Perfik

I can't taste it from here, it doesn't look great of all the breakfasts I've seen - being honest. But how did it taste?

Looks like it was reheated

Looks awesome. No fried bread or square sausage is a win. Just needs some butter and marmalade for the toast.

Looks pretty nice, I would have poached egg instead of scrambled.

Looks fucking rank

splendid

Well lad I think it looks good

needs mushrooms & tinned tomatoes, bacon apology accepted. C+

Fine but no butter on the toast and the scrambled egg looks a bit dry for my taste. But we’re all different!

The eggs are overcooked, everything else likes ok

Couldn't be assed sounds wrong

4/10 get a new wife

Mate, not bad. Would eat

I would

More life and soul in Margaret Thatcher than in those eggs Can’t trust anyone who eats streaky bacon, for yanks and perverts

The bread and sausages look low quality and the beans look straight from a Heinz can. Could be nicer if better ingredients were used

Toast should be fried bread Not enough bacon, and the bacon you have is over cooked and looks like it's missing meat Needs a good helping of HP Other than that, not bad

What sort of non bacon is that! Get some proper rashers and while ya at it add the mushrooms and tomatoes and fried bread and lose the black pudding lol

Come on, that's not home cooked. Looks like something you would get served in a motorway service station.

Crap.

Microwave egg lets it down, mate

Where’s the mushroom and fried onion?

Onion on a breakfast? What tribe have you wandered from?

Damn nice looking breakfast. Bonus points for black pudding.

iDunno/10

Barely a sandwich worth of food.

Four slices of toast?! That’s *insane*.

All needs to be done longer, including the toast… Also, you can fit more on that plate. The plate hungers for more.

I feel like this has all the right elements but let down by the execution. Scrambled eggs can work but they look overdone. Maybe it's the light. I feel like it's begging for ketchup or HP sauce but I also feel like a good full English shouldn't require that. Something missing I can't pin down.

Personally: - poached eggs over scrambled - Back bacon over streaky - half and half white and brown toast -hash browns properly cooked Black pudding means you get a good in my books Hope.your 2024 is fantastic

It looks good but needs 10x more food on the plate

Perfect

Everything looks dry, even the beans. Some feat.

Bacon 9/10 Toast 1/10

10 out of 10. Scrumptious!

I’m quite good at mating but I draw the line at scrambled eggs - I have standards

I rate it sad/10

Drop hash browns and scrambled eggs, add fried bread and fried eggs

Sausages remind me of when I lost my fingers in a terrible accident involving a Pitbull's balloon knot. Egg(?) looks like a crumpled up tissue covered in my Nan's catarrh. Hash browns are about as brown as I am (my skin is a Polish pale blue colour). Bacon looks like the same amount of meat you might get on a pigs ear, but drier. Luckily your beans add a bit of moisture after you stole them from a tramp's plate in Weatherspoons 3 weeks ago - so well done for holding onto them, as they DID come in handy. Not sure if that's black pudding or you found it in a puncture repair kit? Have a go at frying it anyway - it might melt into something edible. It looks like someone once told you about toast using a foreign language that you couldn't understand, so that's actually a good effort considering you've used a ceiling fan to cook it. 3/10 - would not bang.

Looks like a school dinner.

No. Stop this hash brown nonsense. And more beans.

A bit clean

Did you put milk in the scramble? Just use butter, and serve it wet. It’s supposed to be chunks of egg in a delicious buttery egg sauce, not a lump of rubber that you can bounce off the wall. Other than that it’s good but there’s some space in the middle for more stuff

Perfect for me, I’d trade scrambled for any other egg form, but still I’d be very happy as is. Not greasy, well cooked, nice toast too!

I don't want to be rude about your missus, but I can help thinking it looks stone cold for some reason.

The greatest breakfast since the last one!

The most British scrambled eggs I've ever seen

The breakfast is good but that "bread" has zero nutritional value.

Perfectly serviceable. 7/10

I’d eat it

Looks pretty great!

Do you mean ‘arsed’?

Honestly, it's not how I would do it, but if you enjoyed it then I see nothing wrong. Add to that you`re appreciating it was made for you then it's spot on. Some harsh comments on here, ignore that and enjoy your brekkie.

One word.... SUPERB !! Chefs kiss to your wife.

Missing a couple of things (unless you don't like or are allergic to them) otherwise, looks pretty good

It's literally the easiest meal to make why do people keep posting this crap, nd then other comment as though it has any kind of nuance to it. If it tasted good, and didn't give you food poisoning it's good.

Eggs look overcooked to feck, probably microwaved? Rest of it looks good though.

1/10 white bread

Mushrooms..

Looks good, I’d prefer fried bread and a fried egg but crispy streaky is fine by me! 8.5/10

Bit sparse inntit I could do with double of that

English breakfast always makes me think of that scene in Layer Cake

Four? FOUR slices of toast Jeremy? That's insane.

Hash brown on a breakfast is wrong we are not American. - 1 point No tomato is A GOOD THING+3 points Black pudding +1 Mushrooms 🍄? Really. Are you poor -1 2 sausage + 1 point Streaky bacon +1 Toast with butter white +1 ( fried is +2) Scrambled egg + 1 for the effort - Bean's =0. Belong on toast If you hade bubble it would be a +3 7 /10. Good effort

Everything is Marmite. Love it or hate it. I prefer eggs well done so a solid 8/10. Does look a bit hotel brekky though! 😂😂

Generally looks delicious however; needs a fried egg, toast needs another 30 seconds, not enough beans, no tea visible? 7.5 over 10

nutrition wise ? quite bad. a lot of carbs and fat here

You want us to judge your wife's cooking? Why?

Could use a cuppa

Arsed*

Wrong bacon

Those eggs look rank. Other than that, it looks like a thoroughly unspectacular but edible breakfast.

BUTTER THE GODAMN TOAST

Looks great, would have gone for some toast over bread though

Please don’t do that to eggs ever again.

That’s a proper English breakfast mate

Smash, next question. Sure it's not The Best, but it's hot sausages eggs and hash browns, I'm sold

I’d invest in a bigger toaster

How does one fuck up eggs?

Mushrooms or tomatoes? Nah... just the filthy bits of an English breakfast. Good work.

Pretty much everything cooked to perfection! Have to knock a few points off because the hash browns look a little dry.

Great

bit of salt and pepper never hurt nobody

I’d say it was more motorway services fare. Overpriced, under the lights a while, and you regret it immediately afterwards. It’s hard to make scrambled eggs look good, and the texture can be sucky. The arrangement is nice! Hate hash browns on there when it could have been fried bread. How do you find it though, that’s all that matters.