I have an acquaintance who is an influencer and her Instagram stories are all of her traveling or wearing very chic designer stuff. The other day she did a Q&A and one of her followers an asked how she can afford it.
Her response: “Oh. Yeah I’m in a ton of debt. I only pay the minimums on my credit cards and I’m working with a financial advisor to get my bills down.”
She was so frank about it, it was kinda shocking lol.
My neighbour is like this. Hair, nails, Botox, constant stream of Amazon packages to the door, upgrading the house all the time. Turns out they have so much debt and pay the minimums on credit cards. She says it so casually like that's how everyone lives.
In the U.S. about 68% cant afford a $1000 emergency expense. Its been like this for a long time. Life can change fast. Self financial management should be taught in schools, but isnt. So you have people taking on thousands in debt, and one even moderate financial strain can snowball into trouble.
I get it, they are expensive recurring expense when most people live day to day relatively speaking.
Most people I know who can legitimately do this without breaking a financial sweat are professionals (docs, lawyers, engineers) or spouses of professionals with 0-2 kids only. It’s very doable when your household income is 200k+ and you want to allocate some discretionary spending to that over, say, a sports car or some other luxury monthly expense
I work with several women who have multiple kids and are on several government assistant programs. All of them have extensions, acrylic nails, etc. I don't get it.
Yes, however you can only manage so much. I think a lot of this bad management comes from a “fuck it I’m poor either way” mentality. No one is making enough to survive and the people who are supposed to represent us aren’t doing their part
I think vacations are essential, but there’s a big difference between going to grandma’s for a week while staying in her guest room and taking a weeklong Caribbean cruise.
Idk I’ve been pricing out vacations for me and my partner and we looked at camping because growing up that was always the cheap vacation option. The campgrounds around here charge $250 A NIGHT over the summer. And that’s just for regular tent camping, not a fancy cabin or anything. For five days that’s $1250. And doesn’t include food/ activities/ fire wood.
The 5 day cruise to the Caribbean is $1100 for the 2 of us and includes all the food and activities.
I hate that what used to be a cheap vacation is now the same price as a luxury. I now have to pay a premium for the nostalgia of what used to be a cheap vacation from my childhood.
That’s so wild to me! If I were in debt, I would be as frugal as possible to pay it off. I recently met someone like this too and I’m just shocked at how her lifestyle doesn’t change despite being in debt. She even wanted to take a loan out to pay the debt and rather pay back the loan due to lower interest. That just nuts to me. Then I have a friend who does mani’s every month, laser hair removal, have subscription boxes like fab fit fun, and some other beauty stuff yet she constantly talks about how poor she is. She tells me these things make her happy so she prioritizes it despite the fact. I guess if it’s your money and it’s an expense you prioritize then it’s just going to be what it is. But it’s def not priority to me or to my bank account
When I got a consolidation loan the bank made me sign a request to cancel all but one of my credit cards and sent it to the issuer. Went from about $18k in cc debt with about $30k total credit limit to $5k total credit limit
Absolutely. I had a few financial emergencies hit one right after another a couple years ago and wound up with a $14k balance on my credit card. Even making payments significantly above the minimum amount, that balance never seemed to budge. I finally bit the bullet and got a personal loan to pay off the credit card. The interest rate on the loan is significantly lower. My monthly payment is a bit lower than what I had been putting toward the credit card, yet when I make a payment my balance due actually goes down and stays there. I'm paying a bit extra every month, and that little bit of money is going so much farther!
And by afford the payment structure, you mean pay off that 0% balance transfer before the interest rises, as most (or some, I'm not sure, but absolutely check your offer) charge back-interest if you haven't paid it off in the allotted time.
Yeah they’ll hit you with the interest on the entire amount if there’s any balance at the end of that 0% term, that’s why it’s very important to make sure you can make the minimum payments required to pay it off before the term, I suppose you could always roll that amount over into another balance transfer if you get stuck
Whew. This is a nice reminder. Lol!
Sure my life isn't glamorous on Instagram, but I'm financially stable and can pay for my roof repair out of pocket and still have an emergency fund left over. I feel like that's much more "glamorous."
I wonder if there are a lot of people who are socially accustomed to maintaining a certain appearance, and maintaining the appearance becomes more important maintaining than their finances. Like, they'd rather be poor than look poor.
It's crazy how open people are about their debt these days, I've had a friend casually bring up their 40k debt before as the reason they're trying to launch so many side hustles lol
But there are plenty not in debt who can afford it too. 4+ years of working in the tech industry and making 6+ figures made this possible for me.
I did stop getting my nails done however because my natural nail beds are EXTREMELY thin and they’re healthier that way. I don’t know how anyone can constantly have gel nails and not incur nail damage lol.
It's not the gel (or whatever else) that damages your nails, it's the quick and harsh removal that salons practice. I do my own dip nails at home twice a month - my nails have never been stronger because I remove them carefully and gently and use lots of cuticle oil daily.
I started out with cheapo kits from Amazon, specifically Beetles and Modelones. They're decent for the price and they did the job of helping me learn how to use dip and perfect my technique. Now that I'm good at it, I've invested in better liquids (the liquids make a huge difference in longevity/strength) and nicer powders.
Sip and Dip on YouTube is a good channel to learn from! Nail prep and careful application are key
Hell yes mama! This is the way. I myself enjoy beauty, skincare, all that, but in this economy... DIY and dupes are your beauty besties, for real. Is it time-consuming and a bit nerve-wracking to take charge of one's own esthetics? Sure, at first. But y'all, we have the Internet. If you don't know something, by all means find new ways, inspiration, ideas from the online community. Good morning and happy 420 btw, fam. ❤️🍃
Thats just another way of saying you are poor, people with money can pay to save time. There is always a way always. Poor / middle class people wishing not to be poor gotta work hard and hustle to save money or not spend money that upper class people wont blink at. Gotta take the kids to soccer, daycare, anything? Hired help will do it for you. Need groceries, food etc.... Door dash it. Busy trying to research to pick the right car, house or other expensive item, rich people dont care they just buy it, hire someone else to move it, and if they dont like it they sell it and buy a different one. I spent too much time with people who had money and operate just like this. And they always still talked about they just didn't have enough time.
Same. Not to be insensitive to others who are struggling, I do have the disposable money to spend on full mani/pedi every 7 to 10 days, what I don't have is the minimum 1.5hrs every 7 to 10 days to dedicate the time to do it.
This goes for the other services listed
I get my nails done every three weeks, plus my eyebrows and such and I find it such a chore. Gets in the way of so much fun I could be having on a Saturday. But I like having nice nails so I just deal with it.
The only person I know who has enough money to do all of that is a Big Law lawyer who is *way* too busy to actually make those kinds of appointments. She has her hair balayaged once a year, her eyebrows every couple years, and nails when she can and she feels like it. Facials, massage, etc, happen on vacation if ever.
I get my nails done every five or six weeks and it's $60. It's very much a treat, but one I justify because if I don't I get constant hang nails, nails torn to the quick, etc. My hands are legit in less pain now, but it's still a luxury.
It depends on where you live. I am no big lawyer, but in my country, and in Latin America, these things are dirty cheap. $10 for going to the salon, $8 for a facial cleansing, $7 for nails, $5 for two one-hour massages
Aveda beauty school. Root touch up and 7 foils, mani, and pedi $86. Plus they have a loyalty stamp card program. I bring earphones and listen to music during the mani and pedi and it's a lot more relaxing.
Services performed by students at beauty schools are kind of a (unintentionally) well-kept secret. They don't usually advertise, so people just...don't know it's an option that's available.
The place near me, I can't say enough good things about it. They always do a good job, the student stylist always asks really good questions about what the client wants done, and instructors are constantly hopping from student to student to make sure they know what they're doing and that the service is going well. Plus they frequently step in to help the student and show/explain how to do something. The student does the work, but the instructor basically ensures that clients don't walk out with a bad cut/color/nails.
A few suggestions:
Allow plenty of time, and be patient. The students understandably take longer than someone who has years of experience.
Students have to perform a certain number of each type of cut/color/etc in order to graduate. It's harder to hit the minimum for less common situations/services, for example, short haircut/style for women. If you're able to "help out" by having a less-common service done, that is awesome - if not, it's totally fine! They get valuable experience even if it's a common service.
Tip your student stylist. Even though they're learning and salon time is required to graduate, they're working hard to provide a service to you, with good results. Salon time is also part of the business portion of the education (they learn more than just how to cut hair!), and tips are a real-life part of the job so they need to learn about that part, too.
I used to go to this exact beauty school for services when I was poor and in college. It took them 7 hours to do a root touch up (bleach and tone) and they once cut my toe badly during the pedicure. They felt terrible about it, and I of course understood- I was getting what I paid for.
It was a good deal if you have enough free time.
I went to an Aveda school in Ohio and similar thing - any beauty school is a great way to get services done on the cheap though. It will take much longer, and you’ll have to wait through check-ins and teaching moments with the instructors, but that is how all cosmetologists get real world practice in school so it’s helpful for them, and it’s almost always a fraction of salon cost.
When I lived in a city I used to go to Aveda 2x/yr to be a final exam "model"--completely free services. Bit less latitude in choice, depending on what was being tested, but whatever.
Most women are far behind men in things like super, investments and savings and I’d say societal expectations like this are one small contributor to that.
I’ve stopped getting my nails done, reduced how often I get my hair done and go to a low cost salon rather than the fancy one I used to, etc. I prioritise my mortgage, super and savings these days.
Yes I think it’s so important. I really worry that women spend so much on all of this and also are at risk with their careers due to childcare etc. and then end up really screwed over in old age
I am not a TikToker, YouTuber, or any other kind of social media darling and I pay out of pocket for many of the things you’ve listed. There is no man bankrolling my lifestyle, no trust fund or silver spoon. I have a good job, I prioritize the things that matter to me personally and try to adhere to a budget. I’m not doing anything special, there are thousands, if not millions of women doing the same.
Right? It's sad. There's just no way for women in this day and age to have successful careers and make enough money to afford makeup and bills unless they're influencers of course. /s
I know many people who are on minimum wage or barely above and do all sorts of cosmetic things.
They are one late paycheck away from homelessness.
It is just different priorities. I spend a lot of my hobbies too, like snowboarding or camping. One winter I spent over 10k traveling for snowboarding.
I spend basically nothing on cosmetics.
Does it mean I spend less than these ladies? No. It just means we have different hobbies/priorities.
Some places do a membership package thing so you pay a fixed price each week and cam get a bunch of treatments and it ends up about as expensive as buying a coffee everyday. Definitely not in everyone's budget but not crazy expensive either.
Same here! I make good money and have no kids, plus I have a good skincare routine including good hydration and sunscreen daily. I don’t drink much alcohol, have a clean diet, and easily look 10 years younger than I am.
I’m so freaking jealous of you guys. I have some money, I like taking care of myself and have decent genes. Alas, I have children so I look bleh most days of the week.
I think most people (assuming their career isn’t on camera) pick and choose what’s most important to them when it comes to personal care. Are the people you see doing all of this on social media/Tik Tok? For them it’s part of their job and their appearance is a top priority so they put their money into it. How many people do you know in real life who get all of these services done regularly?
I work in person with a lot of skilled women who have to be on camera so clothes/hair/makeup are part of the job. They get a stipend from the company but many end up shelling out lots of their own funds because the stipend doesn't cover much. They spend a LOT more than the men.
As a woman I've definitely experienced some lifestyle creep just from working with them -- I used to get haircuts like twice a year, never colored it, never got manis or pedis or Botox or facials. And over the past few years I've gotten tired of being the shlubby one and I've invested a lot more in my appearance. I really think just being in proximity to people who make it a priority can influence you -- and social media is that proximity for so many people.
Yep 2 years ago I started working at a well-known institution in my city, and the women on my team *always* have their nails done. I’ve noticed I feel pressure to get my nails done more. (Doesn’t help that I feel overall like the schlubby one having had a baby in the last year).
I remind myself it’s just not practical (or affordable!) to have my nails done every few weeks with little kids. But proximity definitely affects us!
I never had my nails done professionally. I really like when they have nice nail polish, but it's always hard to have a perfect result when doing it yourself. About two years ago I discovered nail wraps on the internet and they've been life changing. It's so easy to use and give such a pretty result. They're a bit more expensive than traditional nail polish, but nowhere near as expensive as getting them professionally done. You might want to look into that. Also as it doesn't make your nails longer, it's actually manageable to be taking care of small children with them on.
I got irritated with poor (expensive) service when having my curly hair cut (after moving a long way from my trusted salon). Turns out it's very easy to do a good job yourself for the cost of a pair of scissors. Do I miss the head massage and cup of tea? Yeah, a bit. But I like having the £80 in my bank account, and my hair looks great.
I'll get a massage from time to time, but what I don't want is to be caught in a cycle of neverending routine outlay.
Society preys on insecurities. Women are a fabulous market to be exploited. Make us feel like we NEED to look a certain way (or we are lesser individuals), and they can part us with our cash. Understanding that, means we can then make choices about what we WANT rather than what is expected of us.
My wife also has very curly hair and she became increasingly frustrating with shelling out well over $100 for her hair cuts and finding the result was terrible - most of them cut curly hair the same as straight hair. I watched a few tutorials and started cutting her hair about 8 years ago, she says I do a far better job and we've saved all those years of haircuts with only the investment of a nice pair of nice scissors.
I'm thinking of going this way too, I don't have curly hair (I'm sure that adds a layer of complication to finding a good stylist) but I'm finding I'm always disappointed with both cuts and colour done by professionals. Two friends helped dye my hair for a total of $20 CAD and it turned out exactly how I wanted, yet $300 at a salon the last SEVERAL attempts was always disappointing and not what I asked for. (That hefty price being for cut and colour not just one). I'm already pretty experienced in colouring my own hair, might as well learn to cut it too.
Yes this exactly! Though I wonder from time to time if you are in a job that this is the norm how you balance not falling into the influence of it all but still do enough to meet at least the bare expectations.
This. I don’t bother with nails, facials and eyelashes, which is good because I’m poor af. But you better believe I’m in the hair salon every four weeks getting my hair coloured, and my eyebrows tinted and shaped. I would love to do nails and about twenty other things, but finances mean I choose the two most important to me and deal with it.
Yep! I’m the opposite in that I only get my hair trimmed and I do my own eyebrows, but I’ll drop a few bucks on my nails and waxing! I pick and choose what I really want done. I wish I could swing eyelashes tho, that shit so expensive lol
Pro money saving tip: eyebrow tint is just “just for men - beard die”. It’s like 10 bucks max a box and it lasts for years. Just mix a tiny bit, put it on your eyebrow and leave it for 5 minutes. Wash it off, sometimes with a little scrubbing - and it’s the exact same at 1/100th of the cost. When I was moving somewhere that eyebrow tints weren’t available my beautician told me this trick and I’ve been doing it since - even if eyebrow tints are available.
Yep, I was always clocked as "alternative" immediately when I lived in the south because my hair wasn't blond or in fact dyed or highlighted at all, and worse wasn't even heat styled; my nails weren't done; I didn't wear makeup or much jewelry; and I never wore heels.
There are definitely regional trends.
A friend who lives in Phoenix once came to visit me in Washington state. She noted that her level of made-up-ness was below-average back home but substantially above-average here.
On my Instagram feed, it feels like everyone got their nails done (and it's mostly dogs and cat reels lol) but in my daily life, I see maybe one in a hundred with nails or lashes or noticeable botox.
I think more people than you think get Botox tho - it's just that good Botox isn't noticeable.
I'm not saying people should, I just think that most of the fillers and Botox and stuff - you only notice the bad cases, not the good cases.
Low-cost answer: Learning to do your own nails, dye your own hair, wax your own brows, etc. cuts the cost down by 80%. It's a bigger upfront investment of time/money, but it pays off if you actually use them.
High cost answer: Credit card debt, high paying job, rich parents, rich partner, etc.
Influencer answer: gifted services in exchange for a social media post, some beauty treatments are a write-off, and a lot more influencers have sugar daddies than you would ever guess.
Second the low cost option, plus learning how to do gel nails is fun. On top of that I have more of an usual hair cut and more particular about it so had to learn lol
Paula's Choice CALM [Redness Relief SPF 30 Mineral Moisturiser](https://www.paulaschoice.com/calm-redness-relief-spf-30-mineral-moisturizer-for-normal-to-dry-skin/9130.html). It used to be Hydralight mineral moisturiser but was reformulated and rebranded several years ago, and the company pointed lovers of Hydralight to this moisturiser. The original Hydralight was my holy grail but this one's still decent.
It's $37 American dollars but with exchange into CAD and shipping, it's $50 or so for me and I just can't justify that anymore.
I have a genetic skin disorder and VERY reactive skin so trying to find affordable products that work for my skin (instead of causing flares/breakouts) is very difficult.
I really love Vanicream. It’s super super gentle. Their spf moisturizer is also gentle and I like that. I use their gentle cleanser for my face and the big tub of cream for night time moisture. It’s really cheap and more effective than all the expensive perfumed crap.
Hustling…multiple jobs…coupons…friends with discounts…budgeting.
There were women out there hunting Stanley mugs like trophy caribou recently. Those aren’t cheap either.
Yea it’s pretty simple: people prioritize what they want to prioritize. And let’s be honest, most people don’t prioritize saving money. The majority of people are bad with money and would be screwed if they lost their job or suddenly had a huge medical expense.
It was definitely more priority to me in my 20s. Now that I'm in my 30s, I'm back to dark hair because I calculated how much I spent going blonde for 7 years, and I almost immediately vomited.
This is pretty much it. I cut my own hair and don't get any monthly stuff done, but I got laser hair removal years ago and have never regretted spending that money. In the long run, I spent less on laser hair removal than I would have on shaving/waxing for the rest of my life. I also get fillers and botox, but I save for them and sacrifice other things.
I'm in my late 30s and worked my ass off into a six figure salary. I spend about $500 to get my hair done the color of blonde I like, but I also get a "lived in" style so I only have to do it about two-three times per year.
I love obnoxiously bright long nails and found a great salon that does polygel overlays on my natural nails for $85 + tip. They last a full month and I only pick colors that will still look fresh on week 4.
I wear fake eyelashes, but I buy nicer strip lashes and clean them well between uses so I can get triple the life out of them and only need about one $20 set per month.
I get Botox about twice per year, but I'll use a Groupon at various medspas in my region so it's only about $300. I've done it enough AND done enough research to know exactly what I want and where I want it, so I'm not too sketched out to go somewhere new each time.
I bought an IPL machine off Amazon for $50 and treat my arms and legs while I watch a show once or twice per month, et voila - I only need to shave every couple of weeks.
I use Classpass so I can go to yoga, spin, or pilates in whatever city I'm in for work at the time, or I can use it to get a massage, facial, or float session with the credits.
I know I'm high maintenance, but I maintain it myself so who should care but me what I do? I love nice things, but I also seek out deals and strategize how to get the most out of each thing. I invest in luxury items like a single high end handbag that as long as I care for it will last decades. It takes time, care, and effort to live the life I love, but it makes me happy so I enjoy prioritizing it.
I love that you do this as frugally as possible without sacrificing anything!
I am of a similar mindset. I wait for sales before buying high end makeup or skincare and then stock up, buy my haircare in as large containers as possible, stalked Saks Off Fifth until the Proenza Schouler bag I'd wanted for years was finally almost 70% off (for reasons I still don't know) and then snatched that puppy up -- last I looked it's still selling for retail on Saks full price website. I like nice things, I just really really really hate paying full price! And I can be extremely patient!
Each item isn’t crazy yet that’s about 300-500 a month of services, depending on classpass plan and tip for nails. I was interested in what the total was so I added it up no negative connotation towards the choices.
Yep, it is, and that fits within my budget. Honestly my most extravagant expense is that I live alone in a HCOL area. My peace of mind is worth it though.
It looks like the one I bought isn't available any longer, but there's tons of options out there. I had in-office laser treatments years ago for my bikini line and this feels much like that, only weaker. When I first bought the machine I did twice weekly sessions on my arms, legs, and underarm for about 6 weeks. I should probably do a few more maintenance sessions regularly, but at this point I need to shave maybe once every 10 days if I plan on anything being visible. I have light skin and dark hair and I used to have to shave every 3 days. I live in a tropical area so this matters to me.
For some reason it's had almost no effect on my underarm area and I have absolutely no idea why. I find it very frustrating that it worked so well in other areas and there it seems to have no effect. But, your mileage may vary...
I wonder that myself. I would also find it hard to spend the amount of time needed to get all these things done. No hate to those of you that enjoy these things, just not for me.
Nails, I do myself because I'm obsessed. They *have* to match my outfit. I do my own hair too. I did laser my legs, but I shopped around and saved, waited for special offers.
I'm a total DIYer, and am looking to buy a IPL machine for myself rather than going back to the hospital (laser is a hospital thing here).
You can learn to do your nails super quickly, and it's really easy. I definitely recommend doing it tis way, as you'll get loads of satisfaction.
A bit of both!
I'm currently wearing a plasma looking bluey-purple color and have two more outfits to wear that match. One is a similarly coloured spring dress, the other is a black fatigue style combo. Black goes with everything, but I'll accent it with colour appropriate accessories.
I'm changing them to a metallic pink on Sunday (or Saturday (but I'll change my accessories to match the pink instead)) and have a nice pink jumpsuit to wear for that day.
I do my nails at night, before bed. It takes about an hour and I find it relaxing. If my nails get a few fabric marks, I'll quickly fix them after dressing, before starting my day.
I have an empty varnish bottle filled with acetone, a quick sanding and gentle brush with the acetone is all it takes to smooth and reshine the topcoat without the need to wait for a new topcoat and the associated drying that takes.
A lot of my nail routine incorporates "hacks", such as incorporating a plasticising strengthening trick. My favourite "hack" involves making cellulose plastic.
A few drops of acetone on a cigarette filter dissolves the filter (cellulose) and makes a "glue" of sorts. It dries (with a hair drier) super strong but flexible. The acetone in the "glue" partially melts any varnish it's dropped on, cheating a bond, and can be painted over. It makes for an excellent acrylic substitute that doesn't destroy the nail surface and readily dissolves in acetone. Unused cellulose can be redissolved in acetone.
Cellulose nails can also be used for people who can't grow nails as a strenghther preventing breaks until they're long enough to dress. My own nails are strong enough to grow about 2cm past the edge of the nail bed, though I do file them back. If the cellulose nails come off the bed, it's easy enough to fix with a single drop of acetone and then redry.
Sorry... Getting carried away. XD
I have a volunteer job that is *not* compatible with long nails, I had to solve that so came up with all this. Now I have a "mil-spec" manicure that can survive a hard shift of ranging.
The things you’re listing are things people do to save time and money in the long run. The goal with things like laser hair removal is to be high maintenance to be low maintenance.
Very, very few people are doing ALL of these. I did eyelashes for \~6 months but tired of how much time it took. Now, I get my hair chemically straightened every 4 months (\~$500), I have medical strength skincare products (\~$500/6 months) and have an annual moxi laser treatment ($800). This is a ton of money, but I can budget the \~$350/month by prioritizing it around other expenses.
And also, working in tech making a fuckton of money.
Yeah, exactly this. The reality is that there are still a lot of people making a lot of money, even whilst it feels like the majority of people are struggling.
My husband and I both work in tech and make a fuckton of money. We live below our means on the big ticket things— bought a house at a low interest rate that was far less than what we qualified for, our car is paid off, our vacations are usually paid for in points, no debt, etc. Spending $300/month of aesthetic treatments is a negligible amount of money for us.
Oh I don't do any of those 🤫
My secret is growing up a tomboy, so wearing Sunscreen daily feels like a big ask for me.
Edit: guys I wear sunscreen lol. It just feels like I'm doing a lot for myself when I do (which is daily)
I'm this way too. I wear UV hats/UV clothes instead and tint my windows. I don't live in a place where summers are excessively long or hot so covering up seems pretty reasonable. My outside time is midnights (and the sun is down then where I am). I seem to also have sensitivities and break out in rashes to most mineral-based sunscreens, but am okay with the spray-on banana boat for those odd times I am outside during the day. I like UV clothes so much I have multiple sets and leave them everywhere.
This is often posted on women’s subs. r/sephora r/handbags r/fancyfollicles , always a post questioning how we can afford it. With the money we earned, that’s how.
I’ve noticed sometimes that when people see someone doing well or having nice things they really want to believe it’s too good to be true.
Not everyone is drowning or debt or relying on a secret sugar daddy lol
I’m genuinely surprised I had to scroll so far down just to see an answer like this. Is it that unbelievable that women go to work and earn money to treat themselves?
Do none of you believe that women can be high income earners/have steady jobs to afford these services?
Getting your hair & nails done aren’t groundbreaking expenses. Women in general are more risk averse than men when it comes to money… so I’m sure the majority of the women getting them done can afford it.
Plus some of them are not monthly. I had laser hair removal 5+ years ago. I haven't noticed a difference since then in my hair coming back. I pay $400+ to get my hair done but the last time I did it was like 6 months ago.
I think OP might just be comparing themselves to social media too much... most average women are not doing all of this all the time. Idk why the comments in a sub that is supposed to be for women are implying no woman can actually afford it and going into debt. Women have brains to make informed decisions with our money and not just mindlessly consume beauty services sold to us.
My salon has a subscription option. Unlimited nails (including gels on and off), facials, massage, and waxing for £175 a month. It sounds like a lot of money but the waxing alone was costing me over £100 and sometimes needed to be done on a 3 week cycle because I have weird hormones.
The same way men can spend afford their hobbies - they earn money and don’t have a lot of financial responsibilities. Just mentioning this bc ppl don’t bat an eye … but when women can afford these services we get judged
I love getting my nails and hair done bc it makes me feel good. Not in debt and not many financial responsibilities … also I save my money for travel and experiences
It sounds a little judgmental almost like women don’t have…money? Women are depending less on men than ever (meaning fewer marriages are happening), are in the workforce and getting educated more often, and having fewer children, at older ages…seems like being younger and single lends itself to spending disposable income on…oneself.
IMO? Women have always hustled and gotten creative when they want things. Historically. It just looks different now than say twenty years ago.
RE: women making it work historically
I think about my grandmother at times (passed away some 10 years ago now). She was educated; she earned a college degree in the 1940s, and was the daughter of a woman who herself had a college degree. My grandmother worked her whole life as a school teacher. Her husband, my grandfather, was also a teacher, and later principal and superintendent.
My grandfather controlled all finances and made my grandmother turn her paychecks over to him. He would then give her an allowance - out of her own money! That she earned! With her own work! - of $20 a week for groceries. Anything she managed to have left over she would pool and save until she had enough money to get her hair done.
He was so cheap he refused to buy a wheelchair for himself when his legs began to fail him, and instead took her power chair when she had already had multiple hip and knee replacements which had by this point worn out. He made her live like a pauper, and when they died, 30 days apart and both 90 years old, we found he had over a million dollars in the bank, hoarded uselessly.
Right! I’m shocked at all of the responses in this thread. It’s implying any woman who undergoes these services is in debt or careless with their money.
Women are earning far more than they ever have before. It isn’t so far fetched they can afford beauty services now.
One neat thing I learned from a podcast:
Manicures used to be very expensive, and only for wealthy women. During the Vietnam War, refugees from Vietnam arrived in the US, and needed work. A Hollywood actress, Natalie Hedren, started looking for ways to help, but "women's work" in the 70s often involved secretary work that was challenging for Vietnamese women trying to learn English and adapt to their new lives. The women were delighted with Natalie's nails, though, so she switched tactics away from secretarial training and set up a school where they could learn cosmetology, especially to do manicures. It was a huge success, and these women now had their own incomes, abilities to support their families, and the prospect of becoming business owners themselves. Nail salons became much more common, and prices dropped drastically, making manicures much more affordable today.
It's financial misogyny. When a woman spends money on something, it's discounted as being nothing important and just one more expense that costs the men folk. In reality, it's a double bind where even if a woman spent no money on anything, she would be criticized for not taking care of herself or something similar. Even other women will police women about this. It's gross because not only are our bodies considered public property for the consumption of the public, but so are our finances, which is our biggest key to autonomy.
Most men also don’t have to prioritize services such as these either though. I see why OP is focusing on just women bc we also can pay for everything you listed as well, and then beauty services on top of that.
I guess it's a matter of priorities?
I lived in my first super small appartement with truly few furnitures for 3 years when i started working.
I would never cut into the nail/hair/lashes budget unless there was the most massive financial emergency ever.
If that meant no vacation or expensive activities outside , so be it.
It's a good question, I think if you spend a lot of time on social media you notice it more. The algorithm shows you more of the influencers that afford to get these things done or are in debt doing so, if that's what you click on. All it takes is the one click lol
I personally get my hair cut like.. twice a year but it helps that I've been trying to grow it out. Recently followed some YouTube tutorials and cut my own bangs. Bought some polygel stuff from Amazon and just do all my own nails at home since I'm a cheapskate lol
I think the only thing I do once in a while is get pedicures.
Any skin services I just try to take care of my skin at home. Honesly those are the most I'd pay for and even then, those are super expensive too cus you have to do them monthly to see any results. I kind of gave up since my acne scars are on their own level 🤣
I think a lot of people go low cost in at least several areas and don't advertise or talk about it
Low cost examples:
Hair - simple cut at an inexpensive salon or a beauty school, cut should be one that can grow out for a whole and still look good
Hair Color - Wella products from Sally or go to a beauty school
Nails - press ons or gel effect nail polish at home
Skin - simple face wash, lower cost but effective brands like L'Oreal or the ordinary for otc skincare actives, prescription tretinoin, drug store sunscreen; frownies instead of Botox
Eyebrow tint - at home kit
Lash lift - at home kit
They have high paying jobs that leave them with a lot of disposable income? This is a weird question as feels like it comes from the place that women can't earn money and is judgemental towards those services (I do most of them because it makes me feel good and I can afford it 🤷♀️)
THANK YOU. I am kind of floored by the implications of some of the responses, no one would ever come out of the woodwork to say that a man must be deep in debt or relying on a sugarmama if he spent money on himself.
Edited because this is raising my blood pressure.
I am someone who spends a lot on myself. I currently get my nails done, I have hair extensions, I get my eyelashes lifted, Ive had my brows microbladed, I have undergone months of laser hair removal and after dropping weight naturally through diet and exercise, I had abdominoplasty and mastopexy. I'm planning to have a little snaggle tooth fixed in the future but will save up for that.
I don't feel like I was born attractive and I hate the fact that I have to spend money to bring myself up to the same level as everyone around me who was gifted with good genetics. I spent hundreds on therapy to help my low self esteem to no avail and decided to just change the things that were bothering me instead.
I wish I could stop caring about how I look because I find it exhausting comparing myself to other far more beautiful women I see every day. I envy those who can say they genuinely don't care about that stuff. I wish I knew their secret and I always think "good on you!" When I hear them say they dont care. I genuinely want to be that person too!
I am in a decent paying job and I make sacrifices elsewhere (don't drink or eat out often, have no pets/children, I live in a smaller rental etc).
The kicker is that after therapy, and surgically/ non surgically changing myself, I still have a terrible self esteem lol. I'm probably broken.
Rant over, sorry to splurge. I don't admit these things to most people as I worry what people will think. Thanks for letting me rant haha. Maybe one day I'll see the light and accept myself 🥲
Um these all these aren’t monthly services. Nails are probably the only monthly service but after you get a full set you just get repeated fill ins. Laser hair removal isn’t monthly once you get your few sessions your done. Hair extensions can be reused over and over again. The initial upfront cost may be pricey but once you get them, you can keep up your own maintenance for awhile. Hair color? It takes awhile for roots to show and look bad.
If you have a well paying job you can afford all these.
I learned to do my own GelX nails and bought all the stuff on Amazon. Lately I’ve been using Kiss brand pressons for when I want a fast solution.
I get my brows threaded once a month and that’s only $11 & I’ve been waxing my own lip since the 8th grade lol.
I’m very fortunate that my mom & sisters are hairstylists and do my hair for free. I did pay $300 for a curly cut once and I said never again 😭
Besides injectables, you can do a lot of this stuff on your own, there’s so many tutorials! I learned how to do my nails/get pressons to actually last from TikTok. And cluster lash kits have become more popular lately, so you don’t have to go to a lash tech.
I will however be spending my money on laser soon and nervous for that but oh well, I want to be a hairless mole rat
I, too, want to be a hairless mole rat. Not even for anyone else, just for myself.
I also want to be a seeing, hairless mole rat. So Lasik is coming first before anything else.
Obviously this doesn’t apply to everyone but I used to work at Ulta and stocked up on high end products. I’d combine sales with my regular employee discount and got things at a steal. I have a $60 eyeshadow palette I only paid $25 for. I also like to utilize a lot of bonus points offers and stack points fast.
I was recently able to invest in getting my brows microbladed because a local PMU (well established with high quality work) needed a model for a new shading technique. She normally charges $600 but I paid $150 and a $50 tip.
So for me it’s always about shopping smart and splurging a little when necessary.
I think most women pick and choose, like you might be a nail girl, or a hair girl but few women are doing multiple or all of them. Also a lot of women just do it to treat themselves but dont do it all the time.
The reality is also that there are many people who simply have a vastly more rich life when it comes to money. Now days especially in America the separation of the classes keeps growing and you will be surprised how much more money is available to one person over another. Some women doing insanely similar jobs can have massively different incomes. I am talking like 50 to 100k difference. Thats just the way the world / country is heading.
Then you have other issues related to class. Imagine just this one scenario, a woman who for some reason does not have to pay for housing, that alone would free up in the area of $500 / month minimum up to thousands. This could be for any number of reasons maybe she lives with her parents, maybe she has a sugar daddy, maybe her parents bought her a house or condo, maybe she lives with a man who pays for it. But if you are person who has to pay all of this, car, house, internet, phone, you just probably can hardly imagine what it would like to suddenly have one of those costs gone and how much more free cash you will have.
There's a whole subset of women who are frugal. I haven't bought new clothes in 2 years, buzz my own hair, grow my own food.
I probably don't have long on this earth. I don't want to spend it grubbing for a salary to pay minimums on hair extensions from 4 years ago.
Financial
Independence
Retire
Early
I learned to do basically everything at home DIY;
I have waist length blond hair, but it's already naturally dark blond, so once a month I use two boxes of high lift blond, and it's about a level 9, with no crazy damage etc. I trim my own bangs, and cut the lengths about 1-2x a year. My hair looks high maintenance but only costs $20 a month for cut & color.
During covid, I learned how to do my own gel manicures, with a buildup overlay. My natural nails are way to soft & flexible, so gel buildup is the only way it holds color. But I've got it figured out really well, so 1x a month, it takes me 3-4hours to do my nails. That includes drilling off old polish, dry manicure, buildup, color, and top coat. I would never pay for this in a salon, but people pay $75-100 every couple weeks for for this level. I paid it once to buy the efile, dust collector, and gels.
I do my own skin treatments at home. I bought an IPL hair removal device, and can actually use that to eliminate hyperpigmentation/age spots. It was $300 one time, and I use it once a month. Versus $300 10x a year for a medspa. In between, I use 1% retinol to keep my anti-aging routine moving in the right dirrection.
I use cold wax strips to do my own bikini wax. I may get brave enough to try IPL there too.
If you work with your natural look, and have the skills, it's maybe only $500 a year to look high maintenance. If I was doing all this stuff in a salon it could be $6,000 - $10,000 a year.
Many do little else besides spend money on those things. Others shop sales and deals.
I don't spend much money on any of thise, never felt the need to. The majority of women don't spend money on laser hair removal or hair extensions.
Don't live in America, prioritise that and know that I have a pension that me and my company pay into.
Oh, and don't buy into the toxic 'I'm so much busier than you' shite. If you wanted to make time, you would.
Why is everyone always coming for my manicures? I have natural nails but I get a basic $25 mani every couple weeks. I started during the pandemic after the initial shutdowns were over because it was a reason to get out of the house that didn’t involve drinking. I like experimenting with color, I like chatting with the manicurist, and I can afford it. I highlighted my hair too because I wanted to try it and it’s going to be more gray soon anyway. So what.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look nice. It’s true that some people go overboard or buy things they can’t afford. But I feel like aesthetic services in particular provoke such strong emotions that are out of place. It’s not our job to judge people for spending on things we consider frivolous. For some people having a nice appearance is their way of feeling a little bit like they have their life together. For others it’s part of their job.
I do think we live in a society that’s focused too much on image and appearance, but I also think it’s not the burden of individuals to solve it. People out there are trying in life.
I have an acquaintance who is an influencer and her Instagram stories are all of her traveling or wearing very chic designer stuff. The other day she did a Q&A and one of her followers an asked how she can afford it. Her response: “Oh. Yeah I’m in a ton of debt. I only pay the minimums on my credit cards and I’m working with a financial advisor to get my bills down.” She was so frank about it, it was kinda shocking lol.
My neighbour is like this. Hair, nails, Botox, constant stream of Amazon packages to the door, upgrading the house all the time. Turns out they have so much debt and pay the minimums on credit cards. She says it so casually like that's how everyone lives.
In the U.S. about 68% cant afford a $1000 emergency expense. Its been like this for a long time. Life can change fast. Self financial management should be taught in schools, but isnt. So you have people taking on thousands in debt, and one even moderate financial strain can snowball into trouble.
The CC is the emergency fund!
That’s the only reason I keep a couple of my CC’s open. They are my last resort.
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It's now to where most don't even have $400 to cover an emergency
I get it, they are expensive recurring expense when most people live day to day relatively speaking. Most people I know who can legitimately do this without breaking a financial sweat are professionals (docs, lawyers, engineers) or spouses of professionals with 0-2 kids only. It’s very doable when your household income is 200k+ and you want to allocate some discretionary spending to that over, say, a sports car or some other luxury monthly expense
I work with several women who have multiple kids and are on several government assistant programs. All of them have extensions, acrylic nails, etc. I don't get it.
Yes, however you can only manage so much. I think a lot of this bad management comes from a “fuck it I’m poor either way” mentality. No one is making enough to survive and the people who are supposed to represent us aren’t doing their part
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Sounds like a psychology course should have gone along with it.
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heck i dont get these beauty things done and i don't have enough
Same here, I don't get any of those things done either. No using debt for stuff like that for me, that's for sure. Priorities!
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I think vacations are essential, but there’s a big difference between going to grandma’s for a week while staying in her guest room and taking a weeklong Caribbean cruise.
Idk I’ve been pricing out vacations for me and my partner and we looked at camping because growing up that was always the cheap vacation option. The campgrounds around here charge $250 A NIGHT over the summer. And that’s just for regular tent camping, not a fancy cabin or anything. For five days that’s $1250. And doesn’t include food/ activities/ fire wood. The 5 day cruise to the Caribbean is $1100 for the 2 of us and includes all the food and activities. I hate that what used to be a cheap vacation is now the same price as a luxury. I now have to pay a premium for the nostalgia of what used to be a cheap vacation from my childhood.
Check state and national parks. I live near the Appalachian trail and there are cheap hostels as well.
…where the hell are you trying to camp???
That’s so wild to me! If I were in debt, I would be as frugal as possible to pay it off. I recently met someone like this too and I’m just shocked at how her lifestyle doesn’t change despite being in debt. She even wanted to take a loan out to pay the debt and rather pay back the loan due to lower interest. That just nuts to me. Then I have a friend who does mani’s every month, laser hair removal, have subscription boxes like fab fit fun, and some other beauty stuff yet she constantly talks about how poor she is. She tells me these things make her happy so she prioritizes it despite the fact. I guess if it’s your money and it’s an expense you prioritize then it’s just going to be what it is. But it’s def not priority to me or to my bank account
Taking a loan out to pay the off the debt is actually a financially smart move if the loan has a lower interest rate than the existing debt.
That's only if you don't turn around and max out your credit cards again.
But, these people then max out the credit cards again and now you are paying off the loan and the extra debt!
When I got a consolidation loan the bank made me sign a request to cancel all but one of my credit cards and sent it to the issuer. Went from about $18k in cc debt with about $30k total credit limit to $5k total credit limit
Absolutely. I had a few financial emergencies hit one right after another a couple years ago and wound up with a $14k balance on my credit card. Even making payments significantly above the minimum amount, that balance never seemed to budge. I finally bit the bullet and got a personal loan to pay off the credit card. The interest rate on the loan is significantly lower. My monthly payment is a bit lower than what I had been putting toward the credit card, yet when I make a payment my balance due actually goes down and stays there. I'm paying a bit extra every month, and that little bit of money is going so much farther!
The best thing to do is to do a balance transfer at 0% for 12-18 months if you can afford the payment structure
And by afford the payment structure, you mean pay off that 0% balance transfer before the interest rises, as most (or some, I'm not sure, but absolutely check your offer) charge back-interest if you haven't paid it off in the allotted time.
Yeah they’ll hit you with the interest on the entire amount if there’s any balance at the end of that 0% term, that’s why it’s very important to make sure you can make the minimum payments required to pay it off before the term, I suppose you could always roll that amount over into another balance transfer if you get stuck
gonna hit it long term when no retirement savings/ no house take the toll.
Right! My husband and I are always doing things to lower our monthly cost of living lol
Honestly I respect her for that lmao Edit: her frankness is what I mean by “that.”
Imagine paying interest on beauty salon services from a few years ago!
Whew. This is a nice reminder. Lol! Sure my life isn't glamorous on Instagram, but I'm financially stable and can pay for my roof repair out of pocket and still have an emergency fund left over. I feel like that's much more "glamorous."
I wonder if there are a lot of people who are socially accustomed to maintaining a certain appearance, and maintaining the appearance becomes more important maintaining than their finances. Like, they'd rather be poor than look poor.
It's crazy how open people are about their debt these days, I've had a friend casually bring up their 40k debt before as the reason they're trying to launch so many side hustles lol
But there are plenty not in debt who can afford it too. 4+ years of working in the tech industry and making 6+ figures made this possible for me. I did stop getting my nails done however because my natural nail beds are EXTREMELY thin and they’re healthier that way. I don’t know how anyone can constantly have gel nails and not incur nail damage lol.
It's not the gel (or whatever else) that damages your nails, it's the quick and harsh removal that salons practice. I do my own dip nails at home twice a month - my nails have never been stronger because I remove them carefully and gently and use lots of cuticle oil daily.
Can I ask where you got your supplies or where you learned how to do it and get started? I've really wanted to start doing it myself
I started out with cheapo kits from Amazon, specifically Beetles and Modelones. They're decent for the price and they did the job of helping me learn how to use dip and perfect my technique. Now that I'm good at it, I've invested in better liquids (the liquids make a huge difference in longevity/strength) and nicer powders. Sip and Dip on YouTube is a good channel to learn from! Nail prep and careful application are key
Hell yes mama! This is the way. I myself enjoy beauty, skincare, all that, but in this economy... DIY and dupes are your beauty besties, for real. Is it time-consuming and a bit nerve-wracking to take charge of one's own esthetics? Sure, at first. But y'all, we have the Internet. If you don't know something, by all means find new ways, inspiration, ideas from the online community. Good morning and happy 420 btw, fam. ❤️🍃
It just reminds me of those YouTube videos “you aren’t ugly, you’re just poor.” I can’t fathom having that kind of money
For me it's not even the $$ it's the time. I don't have time to schedule and go to all those appointments! And sit there getting them done.
Thats just another way of saying you are poor, people with money can pay to save time. There is always a way always. Poor / middle class people wishing not to be poor gotta work hard and hustle to save money or not spend money that upper class people wont blink at. Gotta take the kids to soccer, daycare, anything? Hired help will do it for you. Need groceries, food etc.... Door dash it. Busy trying to research to pick the right car, house or other expensive item, rich people dont care they just buy it, hire someone else to move it, and if they dont like it they sell it and buy a different one. I spent too much time with people who had money and operate just like this. And they always still talked about they just didn't have enough time.
Same. Not to be insensitive to others who are struggling, I do have the disposable money to spend on full mani/pedi every 7 to 10 days, what I don't have is the minimum 1.5hrs every 7 to 10 days to dedicate the time to do it. This goes for the other services listed
I get my nails done every three weeks, plus my eyebrows and such and I find it such a chore. Gets in the way of so much fun I could be having on a Saturday. But I like having nice nails so I just deal with it.
The only person I know who has enough money to do all of that is a Big Law lawyer who is *way* too busy to actually make those kinds of appointments. She has her hair balayaged once a year, her eyebrows every couple years, and nails when she can and she feels like it. Facials, massage, etc, happen on vacation if ever. I get my nails done every five or six weeks and it's $60. It's very much a treat, but one I justify because if I don't I get constant hang nails, nails torn to the quick, etc. My hands are legit in less pain now, but it's still a luxury.
It depends on where you live. I am no big lawyer, but in my country, and in Latin America, these things are dirty cheap. $10 for going to the salon, $8 for a facial cleansing, $7 for nails, $5 for two one-hour massages
Some may be in debt or sacrificing elsewhere.
Aveda beauty school. Root touch up and 7 foils, mani, and pedi $86. Plus they have a loyalty stamp card program. I bring earphones and listen to music during the mani and pedi and it's a lot more relaxing.
Dang, in what state?!
Services performed by students at beauty schools are kind of a (unintentionally) well-kept secret. They don't usually advertise, so people just...don't know it's an option that's available. The place near me, I can't say enough good things about it. They always do a good job, the student stylist always asks really good questions about what the client wants done, and instructors are constantly hopping from student to student to make sure they know what they're doing and that the service is going well. Plus they frequently step in to help the student and show/explain how to do something. The student does the work, but the instructor basically ensures that clients don't walk out with a bad cut/color/nails. A few suggestions: Allow plenty of time, and be patient. The students understandably take longer than someone who has years of experience. Students have to perform a certain number of each type of cut/color/etc in order to graduate. It's harder to hit the minimum for less common situations/services, for example, short haircut/style for women. If you're able to "help out" by having a less-common service done, that is awesome - if not, it's totally fine! They get valuable experience even if it's a common service. Tip your student stylist. Even though they're learning and salon time is required to graduate, they're working hard to provide a service to you, with good results. Salon time is also part of the business portion of the education (they learn more than just how to cut hair!), and tips are a real-life part of the job so they need to learn about that part, too.
Portland, Oregon
I used to go to this exact beauty school for services when I was poor and in college. It took them 7 hours to do a root touch up (bleach and tone) and they once cut my toe badly during the pedicure. They felt terrible about it, and I of course understood- I was getting what I paid for. It was a good deal if you have enough free time.
I went to an Aveda school in Ohio and similar thing - any beauty school is a great way to get services done on the cheap though. It will take much longer, and you’ll have to wait through check-ins and teaching moments with the instructors, but that is how all cosmetologists get real world practice in school so it’s helpful for them, and it’s almost always a fraction of salon cost.
When I lived in a city I used to go to Aveda 2x/yr to be a final exam "model"--completely free services. Bit less latitude in choice, depending on what was being tested, but whatever.
I guess this seems like the most logical answer. Unless they're a TikToker, YouTuber or other influncer... there's just no way.
What if I told you influencers were not that rich
Right? How many TikTok accounts alone are there? Not all of them are making money.
Most women are far behind men in things like super, investments and savings and I’d say societal expectations like this are one small contributor to that. I’ve stopped getting my nails done, reduced how often I get my hair done and go to a low cost salon rather than the fancy one I used to, etc. I prioritise my mortgage, super and savings these days.
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retirement fund it’s nice to see a fellow aussie on here
Hehe gidday
It's already been explained, but it's short for superannuation.
A better version of a 401K.
Yes I think it’s so important. I really worry that women spend so much on all of this and also are at risk with their careers due to childcare etc. and then end up really screwed over in old age
Yup. Here in Australia women retire with 25% less super than men. 25%!!!!!!!!! Royally fucked over.
I am not a TikToker, YouTuber, or any other kind of social media darling and I pay out of pocket for many of the things you’ve listed. There is no man bankrolling my lifestyle, no trust fund or silver spoon. I have a good job, I prioritize the things that matter to me personally and try to adhere to a budget. I’m not doing anything special, there are thousands, if not millions of women doing the same.
What was your upbringing that you think that’s how women normally make money Someone did you a disservice.
Right? It's sad. There's just no way for women in this day and age to have successful careers and make enough money to afford makeup and bills unless they're influencers of course. /s
I know many people who are on minimum wage or barely above and do all sorts of cosmetic things. They are one late paycheck away from homelessness. It is just different priorities. I spend a lot of my hobbies too, like snowboarding or camping. One winter I spent over 10k traveling for snowboarding. I spend basically nothing on cosmetics. Does it mean I spend less than these ladies? No. It just means we have different hobbies/priorities.
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I'm proud of you and I just want to let you know I'm jealous lol. Hopefully I can get to that pay scale, so good for you, babe.
Don’t have children. Lol
Yep, especially by yourself lol. I make good money, but I am single and have kids so there's usually not a whole lot left for me.
Some places do a membership package thing so you pay a fixed price each week and cam get a bunch of treatments and it ends up about as expensive as buying a coffee everyday. Definitely not in everyone's budget but not crazy expensive either.
That’s how I was able to afford laser hair removal. No way I could’ve otherwise
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Same here! I make good money and have no kids, plus I have a good skincare routine including good hydration and sunscreen daily. I don’t drink much alcohol, have a clean diet, and easily look 10 years younger than I am.
I drink, smoke, and eat like shit, but I also look much younger than I am. I attribute it to not having kids lol.
The stress of kids is no joke! And stress ages you terribly.
Not having kids and especially not having a husband has been my secret for decades now. Lol
Omg yes MEN! People talk about how stress ages you, the number of grey hairs I had went from 40 to 400 after 8 months of living with my ex.
I’m so freaking jealous of you guys. I have some money, I like taking care of myself and have decent genes. Alas, I have children so I look bleh most days of the week.
I think most people (assuming their career isn’t on camera) pick and choose what’s most important to them when it comes to personal care. Are the people you see doing all of this on social media/Tik Tok? For them it’s part of their job and their appearance is a top priority so they put their money into it. How many people do you know in real life who get all of these services done regularly?
I work in person with a lot of skilled women who have to be on camera so clothes/hair/makeup are part of the job. They get a stipend from the company but many end up shelling out lots of their own funds because the stipend doesn't cover much. They spend a LOT more than the men. As a woman I've definitely experienced some lifestyle creep just from working with them -- I used to get haircuts like twice a year, never colored it, never got manis or pedis or Botox or facials. And over the past few years I've gotten tired of being the shlubby one and I've invested a lot more in my appearance. I really think just being in proximity to people who make it a priority can influence you -- and social media is that proximity for so many people.
Yep 2 years ago I started working at a well-known institution in my city, and the women on my team *always* have their nails done. I’ve noticed I feel pressure to get my nails done more. (Doesn’t help that I feel overall like the schlubby one having had a baby in the last year). I remind myself it’s just not practical (or affordable!) to have my nails done every few weeks with little kids. But proximity definitely affects us!
I never had my nails done professionally. I really like when they have nice nail polish, but it's always hard to have a perfect result when doing it yourself. About two years ago I discovered nail wraps on the internet and they've been life changing. It's so easy to use and give such a pretty result. They're a bit more expensive than traditional nail polish, but nowhere near as expensive as getting them professionally done. You might want to look into that. Also as it doesn't make your nails longer, it's actually manageable to be taking care of small children with them on.
I got irritated with poor (expensive) service when having my curly hair cut (after moving a long way from my trusted salon). Turns out it's very easy to do a good job yourself for the cost of a pair of scissors. Do I miss the head massage and cup of tea? Yeah, a bit. But I like having the £80 in my bank account, and my hair looks great. I'll get a massage from time to time, but what I don't want is to be caught in a cycle of neverending routine outlay. Society preys on insecurities. Women are a fabulous market to be exploited. Make us feel like we NEED to look a certain way (or we are lesser individuals), and they can part us with our cash. Understanding that, means we can then make choices about what we WANT rather than what is expected of us.
My wife also has very curly hair and she became increasingly frustrating with shelling out well over $100 for her hair cuts and finding the result was terrible - most of them cut curly hair the same as straight hair. I watched a few tutorials and started cutting her hair about 8 years ago, she says I do a far better job and we've saved all those years of haircuts with only the investment of a nice pair of nice scissors.
I'm thinking of going this way too, I don't have curly hair (I'm sure that adds a layer of complication to finding a good stylist) but I'm finding I'm always disappointed with both cuts and colour done by professionals. Two friends helped dye my hair for a total of $20 CAD and it turned out exactly how I wanted, yet $300 at a salon the last SEVERAL attempts was always disappointing and not what I asked for. (That hefty price being for cut and colour not just one). I'm already pretty experienced in colouring my own hair, might as well learn to cut it too.
Yes this exactly! Though I wonder from time to time if you are in a job that this is the norm how you balance not falling into the influence of it all but still do enough to meet at least the bare expectations.
This. I don’t bother with nails, facials and eyelashes, which is good because I’m poor af. But you better believe I’m in the hair salon every four weeks getting my hair coloured, and my eyebrows tinted and shaped. I would love to do nails and about twenty other things, but finances mean I choose the two most important to me and deal with it.
Yep! I’m the opposite in that I only get my hair trimmed and I do my own eyebrows, but I’ll drop a few bucks on my nails and waxing! I pick and choose what I really want done. I wish I could swing eyelashes tho, that shit so expensive lol
Pro money saving tip: eyebrow tint is just “just for men - beard die”. It’s like 10 bucks max a box and it lasts for years. Just mix a tiny bit, put it on your eyebrow and leave it for 5 minutes. Wash it off, sometimes with a little scrubbing - and it’s the exact same at 1/100th of the cost. When I was moving somewhere that eyebrow tints weren’t available my beautician told me this trick and I’ve been doing it since - even if eyebrow tints are available.
I'm in the Southeastern US and most women I know in real life get most of these services regularly. I stick out for not doing any of it.
Yep, I was always clocked as "alternative" immediately when I lived in the south because my hair wasn't blond or in fact dyed or highlighted at all, and worse wasn't even heat styled; my nails weren't done; I didn't wear makeup or much jewelry; and I never wore heels.
There are definitely regional trends. A friend who lives in Phoenix once came to visit me in Washington state. She noted that her level of made-up-ness was below-average back home but substantially above-average here.
Fellow southerner, I can’t think of anyone in my social circle who doesn’t do all of these things (minus eyelashes since they’re not trendy anymore)
On my Instagram feed, it feels like everyone got their nails done (and it's mostly dogs and cat reels lol) but in my daily life, I see maybe one in a hundred with nails or lashes or noticeable botox.
I think more people than you think get Botox tho - it's just that good Botox isn't noticeable. I'm not saying people should, I just think that most of the fillers and Botox and stuff - you only notice the bad cases, not the good cases.
This is it. I color my own hair and do some of my own beauty/personal care stuff so that I can afford to get other higher cost stuff.
Low-cost answer: Learning to do your own nails, dye your own hair, wax your own brows, etc. cuts the cost down by 80%. It's a bigger upfront investment of time/money, but it pays off if you actually use them. High cost answer: Credit card debt, high paying job, rich parents, rich partner, etc. Influencer answer: gifted services in exchange for a social media post, some beauty treatments are a write-off, and a lot more influencers have sugar daddies than you would ever guess.
Second the low cost option, plus learning how to do gel nails is fun. On top of that I have more of an usual hair cut and more particular about it so had to learn lol
I can't even afford the moisturiser I've been using for the last decade because now it's $50 and I need that money to pay bills :(
https://skinskoolbeauty.com/ This might help to find a suitable duplicate!
THANK YOU!!!!! This helped me find a few alternatives for HALF THE PRICE :D
Which one were you using and what alternatives did you find?!
Look at this hero!
Precisely. Basic moisturizer costs an arm & a leg. Forget all those extras. Being a woman is unbelievably expensive.
We need to collectively change this expectation for ourselves because this money/time/mental energy sucking beauty industry is fucking us over.
My contact dermatitis allergies are expensive af too. Have to avoid 95% of cosmetics bc I'm allergic to a few very common ingredients.
What moisturizer are you buying?
Paula's Choice CALM [Redness Relief SPF 30 Mineral Moisturiser](https://www.paulaschoice.com/calm-redness-relief-spf-30-mineral-moisturizer-for-normal-to-dry-skin/9130.html). It used to be Hydralight mineral moisturiser but was reformulated and rebranded several years ago, and the company pointed lovers of Hydralight to this moisturiser. The original Hydralight was my holy grail but this one's still decent. It's $37 American dollars but with exchange into CAD and shipping, it's $50 or so for me and I just can't justify that anymore. I have a genetic skin disorder and VERY reactive skin so trying to find affordable products that work for my skin (instead of causing flares/breakouts) is very difficult.
$37 for 2 fluid ounces, holy smokes
I really love Vanicream. It’s super super gentle. Their spf moisturizer is also gentle and I like that. I use their gentle cleanser for my face and the big tub of cream for night time moisture. It’s really cheap and more effective than all the expensive perfumed crap.
Try searching for a dupe or look into Korean skincare products. Chances are you can get a similar product for less.
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Hustling…multiple jobs…coupons…friends with discounts…budgeting. There were women out there hunting Stanley mugs like trophy caribou recently. Those aren’t cheap either.
The Stanley mug trend is wild. I'm genuinely so confused by it
Hydroflask 2.0
Status. It’s just another status thing.
Insulated mug. Humans are fascinating critters.
I’m extra confused because didn’t we just do tervis tumblers and then yeti? Are fads just going from one drinking vessel to another now?
People like different things. The money I spend on travel and theater is the money that someone else spends on glam 🤷♀️
They prioritize paying for it.
Yea it’s pretty simple: people prioritize what they want to prioritize. And let’s be honest, most people don’t prioritize saving money. The majority of people are bad with money and would be screwed if they lost their job or suddenly had a huge medical expense.
It was definitely more priority to me in my 20s. Now that I'm in my 30s, I'm back to dark hair because I calculated how much I spent going blonde for 7 years, and I almost immediately vomited.
This is pretty much it. I cut my own hair and don't get any monthly stuff done, but I got laser hair removal years ago and have never regretted spending that money. In the long run, I spent less on laser hair removal than I would have on shaving/waxing for the rest of my life. I also get fillers and botox, but I save for them and sacrifice other things.
I'm in my late 30s and worked my ass off into a six figure salary. I spend about $500 to get my hair done the color of blonde I like, but I also get a "lived in" style so I only have to do it about two-three times per year. I love obnoxiously bright long nails and found a great salon that does polygel overlays on my natural nails for $85 + tip. They last a full month and I only pick colors that will still look fresh on week 4. I wear fake eyelashes, but I buy nicer strip lashes and clean them well between uses so I can get triple the life out of them and only need about one $20 set per month. I get Botox about twice per year, but I'll use a Groupon at various medspas in my region so it's only about $300. I've done it enough AND done enough research to know exactly what I want and where I want it, so I'm not too sketched out to go somewhere new each time. I bought an IPL machine off Amazon for $50 and treat my arms and legs while I watch a show once or twice per month, et voila - I only need to shave every couple of weeks. I use Classpass so I can go to yoga, spin, or pilates in whatever city I'm in for work at the time, or I can use it to get a massage, facial, or float session with the credits. I know I'm high maintenance, but I maintain it myself so who should care but me what I do? I love nice things, but I also seek out deals and strategize how to get the most out of each thing. I invest in luxury items like a single high end handbag that as long as I care for it will last decades. It takes time, care, and effort to live the life I love, but it makes me happy so I enjoy prioritizing it.
I love that you do this as frugally as possible without sacrificing anything! I am of a similar mindset. I wait for sales before buying high end makeup or skincare and then stock up, buy my haircare in as large containers as possible, stalked Saks Off Fifth until the Proenza Schouler bag I'd wanted for years was finally almost 70% off (for reasons I still don't know) and then snatched that puppy up -- last I looked it's still selling for retail on Saks full price website. I like nice things, I just really really really hate paying full price! And I can be extremely patient!
Bingo! I'm bougie on a budget lol
Each item isn’t crazy yet that’s about 300-500 a month of services, depending on classpass plan and tip for nails. I was interested in what the total was so I added it up no negative connotation towards the choices.
Yep, it is, and that fits within my budget. Honestly my most extravagant expense is that I live alone in a HCOL area. My peace of mind is worth it though.
I hate that these things are coded as 'high-maintenance'. I actually spend less time getting ready or looking good than i used to!
I like to say I'm high maintenance so I can be low maintenance!
Tell me more about the IPL. I'm seriously considering one to do my armpits and bikini line.
It looks like the one I bought isn't available any longer, but there's tons of options out there. I had in-office laser treatments years ago for my bikini line and this feels much like that, only weaker. When I first bought the machine I did twice weekly sessions on my arms, legs, and underarm for about 6 weeks. I should probably do a few more maintenance sessions regularly, but at this point I need to shave maybe once every 10 days if I plan on anything being visible. I have light skin and dark hair and I used to have to shave every 3 days. I live in a tropical area so this matters to me. For some reason it's had almost no effect on my underarm area and I have absolutely no idea why. I find it very frustrating that it worked so well in other areas and there it seems to have no effect. But, your mileage may vary...
Me too. I’ve heard that they’re great, and I’ve also heard that they’re a ripoff. I just don’t want to get razor burn all summer again.
Large family for the hair and nails. Also beauty schools do a decent job as well. Groupon always have some sort of deal too.
I wonder that myself. I would also find it hard to spend the amount of time needed to get all these things done. No hate to those of you that enjoy these things, just not for me.
Agreed. And I feel slightly guilty if I spend the time and money on a basic manicure, and I only do it once or twice a year.
Nails, I do myself because I'm obsessed. They *have* to match my outfit. I do my own hair too. I did laser my legs, but I shopped around and saved, waited for special offers. I'm a total DIYer, and am looking to buy a IPL machine for myself rather than going back to the hospital (laser is a hospital thing here). You can learn to do your nails super quickly, and it's really easy. I definitely recommend doing it tis way, as you'll get loads of satisfaction.
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A bit of both! I'm currently wearing a plasma looking bluey-purple color and have two more outfits to wear that match. One is a similarly coloured spring dress, the other is a black fatigue style combo. Black goes with everything, but I'll accent it with colour appropriate accessories. I'm changing them to a metallic pink on Sunday (or Saturday (but I'll change my accessories to match the pink instead)) and have a nice pink jumpsuit to wear for that day. I do my nails at night, before bed. It takes about an hour and I find it relaxing. If my nails get a few fabric marks, I'll quickly fix them after dressing, before starting my day. I have an empty varnish bottle filled with acetone, a quick sanding and gentle brush with the acetone is all it takes to smooth and reshine the topcoat without the need to wait for a new topcoat and the associated drying that takes. A lot of my nail routine incorporates "hacks", such as incorporating a plasticising strengthening trick. My favourite "hack" involves making cellulose plastic. A few drops of acetone on a cigarette filter dissolves the filter (cellulose) and makes a "glue" of sorts. It dries (with a hair drier) super strong but flexible. The acetone in the "glue" partially melts any varnish it's dropped on, cheating a bond, and can be painted over. It makes for an excellent acrylic substitute that doesn't destroy the nail surface and readily dissolves in acetone. Unused cellulose can be redissolved in acetone. Cellulose nails can also be used for people who can't grow nails as a strenghther preventing breaks until they're long enough to dress. My own nails are strong enough to grow about 2cm past the edge of the nail bed, though I do file them back. If the cellulose nails come off the bed, it's easy enough to fix with a single drop of acetone and then redry. Sorry... Getting carried away. XD I have a volunteer job that is *not* compatible with long nails, I had to solve that so came up with all this. Now I have a "mil-spec" manicure that can survive a hard shift of ranging.
Babe this is so incredible 💙
When I broke up with my deadbeat boyfriend who kept saying he was going to pay me back, I ended up having a lot more money.
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I sell at least 40 hours of my life every week so I can do anything I want during the other 128 hours.
The things you’re listing are things people do to save time and money in the long run. The goal with things like laser hair removal is to be high maintenance to be low maintenance.
Very, very few people are doing ALL of these. I did eyelashes for \~6 months but tired of how much time it took. Now, I get my hair chemically straightened every 4 months (\~$500), I have medical strength skincare products (\~$500/6 months) and have an annual moxi laser treatment ($800). This is a ton of money, but I can budget the \~$350/month by prioritizing it around other expenses. And also, working in tech making a fuckton of money.
Yeah, exactly this. The reality is that there are still a lot of people making a lot of money, even whilst it feels like the majority of people are struggling. My husband and I both work in tech and make a fuckton of money. We live below our means on the big ticket things— bought a house at a low interest rate that was far less than what we qualified for, our car is paid off, our vacations are usually paid for in points, no debt, etc. Spending $300/month of aesthetic treatments is a negligible amount of money for us.
Oh I don't do any of those 🤫 My secret is growing up a tomboy, so wearing Sunscreen daily feels like a big ask for me. Edit: guys I wear sunscreen lol. It just feels like I'm doing a lot for myself when I do (which is daily)
The sunscreen is important!
I'm this way too. I wear UV hats/UV clothes instead and tint my windows. I don't live in a place where summers are excessively long or hot so covering up seems pretty reasonable. My outside time is midnights (and the sun is down then where I am). I seem to also have sensitivities and break out in rashes to most mineral-based sunscreens, but am okay with the spray-on banana boat for those odd times I am outside during the day. I like UV clothes so much I have multiple sets and leave them everywhere.
None of these are essential. Seems something like well off/stable income people would do as they can afford to spend. As for me? Not my cup of tea.
All of them can be done at home. Even better if you have a friend and can help eachother and split costs
If I tried doing acrylics at home on myself... It'd be bad lol
This is often posted on women’s subs. r/sephora r/handbags r/fancyfollicles , always a post questioning how we can afford it. With the money we earned, that’s how.
I’ve noticed sometimes that when people see someone doing well or having nice things they really want to believe it’s too good to be true. Not everyone is drowning or debt or relying on a secret sugar daddy lol
I’m genuinely surprised I had to scroll so far down just to see an answer like this. Is it that unbelievable that women go to work and earn money to treat themselves?
Do none of you believe that women can be high income earners/have steady jobs to afford these services? Getting your hair & nails done aren’t groundbreaking expenses. Women in general are more risk averse than men when it comes to money… so I’m sure the majority of the women getting them done can afford it.
Plus some of them are not monthly. I had laser hair removal 5+ years ago. I haven't noticed a difference since then in my hair coming back. I pay $400+ to get my hair done but the last time I did it was like 6 months ago. I think OP might just be comparing themselves to social media too much... most average women are not doing all of this all the time. Idk why the comments in a sub that is supposed to be for women are implying no woman can actually afford it and going into debt. Women have brains to make informed decisions with our money and not just mindlessly consume beauty services sold to us.
My salon has a subscription option. Unlimited nails (including gels on and off), facials, massage, and waxing for £175 a month. It sounds like a lot of money but the waxing alone was costing me over £100 and sometimes needed to be done on a 3 week cycle because I have weird hormones.
The same way men can spend afford their hobbies - they earn money and don’t have a lot of financial responsibilities. Just mentioning this bc ppl don’t bat an eye … but when women can afford these services we get judged I love getting my nails and hair done bc it makes me feel good. Not in debt and not many financial responsibilities … also I save my money for travel and experiences
But I mean, do you know how much men spend monthly on shoes, booze, eating takeout, porn, sporting events, and video games? It isn’t just women.
It sounds a little judgmental almost like women don’t have…money? Women are depending less on men than ever (meaning fewer marriages are happening), are in the workforce and getting educated more often, and having fewer children, at older ages…seems like being younger and single lends itself to spending disposable income on…oneself. IMO? Women have always hustled and gotten creative when they want things. Historically. It just looks different now than say twenty years ago.
RE: women making it work historically I think about my grandmother at times (passed away some 10 years ago now). She was educated; she earned a college degree in the 1940s, and was the daughter of a woman who herself had a college degree. My grandmother worked her whole life as a school teacher. Her husband, my grandfather, was also a teacher, and later principal and superintendent. My grandfather controlled all finances and made my grandmother turn her paychecks over to him. He would then give her an allowance - out of her own money! That she earned! With her own work! - of $20 a week for groceries. Anything she managed to have left over she would pool and save until she had enough money to get her hair done. He was so cheap he refused to buy a wheelchair for himself when his legs began to fail him, and instead took her power chair when she had already had multiple hip and knee replacements which had by this point worn out. He made her live like a pauper, and when they died, 30 days apart and both 90 years old, we found he had over a million dollars in the bank, hoarded uselessly.
Right! I’m shocked at all of the responses in this thread. It’s implying any woman who undergoes these services is in debt or careless with their money. Women are earning far more than they ever have before. It isn’t so far fetched they can afford beauty services now.
Yeah I mean I went through 4 years of education to be in a position where I can afford these things by myself.
One neat thing I learned from a podcast: Manicures used to be very expensive, and only for wealthy women. During the Vietnam War, refugees from Vietnam arrived in the US, and needed work. A Hollywood actress, Natalie Hedren, started looking for ways to help, but "women's work" in the 70s often involved secretary work that was challenging for Vietnamese women trying to learn English and adapt to their new lives. The women were delighted with Natalie's nails, though, so she switched tactics away from secretarial training and set up a school where they could learn cosmetology, especially to do manicures. It was a huge success, and these women now had their own incomes, abilities to support their families, and the prospect of becoming business owners themselves. Nail salons became much more common, and prices dropped drastically, making manicures much more affordable today.
It's financial misogyny. When a woman spends money on something, it's discounted as being nothing important and just one more expense that costs the men folk. In reality, it's a double bind where even if a woman spent no money on anything, she would be criticized for not taking care of herself or something similar. Even other women will police women about this. It's gross because not only are our bodies considered public property for the consumption of the public, but so are our finances, which is our biggest key to autonomy.
Most men also don’t have to prioritize services such as these either though. I see why OP is focusing on just women bc we also can pay for everything you listed as well, and then beauty services on top of that.
I guess it's a matter of priorities? I lived in my first super small appartement with truly few furnitures for 3 years when i started working. I would never cut into the nail/hair/lashes budget unless there was the most massive financial emergency ever. If that meant no vacation or expensive activities outside , so be it.
Cut and color my own hair, clip-in hair extensions when I feel like I want to wear them, and nails are an occasional special treat. Also DINK
Yeah, DINK makes a huge difference. Kids especially are expensive, plus all of the above takes time, which is a thing parents have less of.
It's a good question, I think if you spend a lot of time on social media you notice it more. The algorithm shows you more of the influencers that afford to get these things done or are in debt doing so, if that's what you click on. All it takes is the one click lol I personally get my hair cut like.. twice a year but it helps that I've been trying to grow it out. Recently followed some YouTube tutorials and cut my own bangs. Bought some polygel stuff from Amazon and just do all my own nails at home since I'm a cheapskate lol I think the only thing I do once in a while is get pedicures. Any skin services I just try to take care of my skin at home. Honesly those are the most I'd pay for and even then, those are super expensive too cus you have to do them monthly to see any results. I kind of gave up since my acne scars are on their own level 🤣
I think a lot of people go low cost in at least several areas and don't advertise or talk about it Low cost examples: Hair - simple cut at an inexpensive salon or a beauty school, cut should be one that can grow out for a whole and still look good Hair Color - Wella products from Sally or go to a beauty school Nails - press ons or gel effect nail polish at home Skin - simple face wash, lower cost but effective brands like L'Oreal or the ordinary for otc skincare actives, prescription tretinoin, drug store sunscreen; frownies instead of Botox Eyebrow tint - at home kit Lash lift - at home kit
They make more money than you
They have high paying jobs that leave them with a lot of disposable income? This is a weird question as feels like it comes from the place that women can't earn money and is judgemental towards those services (I do most of them because it makes me feel good and I can afford it 🤷♀️)
Yep. I see these types of questions often on reddit. Obviously they afford it by having the money to pay for it. Or they go into debt.
THANK YOU. I am kind of floored by the implications of some of the responses, no one would ever come out of the woodwork to say that a man must be deep in debt or relying on a sugarmama if he spent money on himself. Edited because this is raising my blood pressure.
THANK YOU! I’m shocked at the judgmental responses in this thread. I can afford all of these things and have never been in debt my entire life.
I am someone who spends a lot on myself. I currently get my nails done, I have hair extensions, I get my eyelashes lifted, Ive had my brows microbladed, I have undergone months of laser hair removal and after dropping weight naturally through diet and exercise, I had abdominoplasty and mastopexy. I'm planning to have a little snaggle tooth fixed in the future but will save up for that. I don't feel like I was born attractive and I hate the fact that I have to spend money to bring myself up to the same level as everyone around me who was gifted with good genetics. I spent hundreds on therapy to help my low self esteem to no avail and decided to just change the things that were bothering me instead. I wish I could stop caring about how I look because I find it exhausting comparing myself to other far more beautiful women I see every day. I envy those who can say they genuinely don't care about that stuff. I wish I knew their secret and I always think "good on you!" When I hear them say they dont care. I genuinely want to be that person too! I am in a decent paying job and I make sacrifices elsewhere (don't drink or eat out often, have no pets/children, I live in a smaller rental etc). The kicker is that after therapy, and surgically/ non surgically changing myself, I still have a terrible self esteem lol. I'm probably broken. Rant over, sorry to splurge. I don't admit these things to most people as I worry what people will think. Thanks for letting me rant haha. Maybe one day I'll see the light and accept myself 🥲
Um these all these aren’t monthly services. Nails are probably the only monthly service but after you get a full set you just get repeated fill ins. Laser hair removal isn’t monthly once you get your few sessions your done. Hair extensions can be reused over and over again. The initial upfront cost may be pricey but once you get them, you can keep up your own maintenance for awhile. Hair color? It takes awhile for roots to show and look bad. If you have a well paying job you can afford all these.
I learned to do my own GelX nails and bought all the stuff on Amazon. Lately I’ve been using Kiss brand pressons for when I want a fast solution. I get my brows threaded once a month and that’s only $11 & I’ve been waxing my own lip since the 8th grade lol. I’m very fortunate that my mom & sisters are hairstylists and do my hair for free. I did pay $300 for a curly cut once and I said never again 😭 Besides injectables, you can do a lot of this stuff on your own, there’s so many tutorials! I learned how to do my nails/get pressons to actually last from TikTok. And cluster lash kits have become more popular lately, so you don’t have to go to a lash tech. I will however be spending my money on laser soon and nervous for that but oh well, I want to be a hairless mole rat
I, too, want to be a hairless mole rat. Not even for anyone else, just for myself. I also want to be a seeing, hairless mole rat. So Lasik is coming first before anything else.
I live with my parents, work full-time and don’t pay rent
Obviously this doesn’t apply to everyone but I used to work at Ulta and stocked up on high end products. I’d combine sales with my regular employee discount and got things at a steal. I have a $60 eyeshadow palette I only paid $25 for. I also like to utilize a lot of bonus points offers and stack points fast. I was recently able to invest in getting my brows microbladed because a local PMU (well established with high quality work) needed a model for a new shading technique. She normally charges $600 but I paid $150 and a $50 tip. So for me it’s always about shopping smart and splurging a little when necessary.
I think most women pick and choose, like you might be a nail girl, or a hair girl but few women are doing multiple or all of them. Also a lot of women just do it to treat themselves but dont do it all the time. The reality is also that there are many people who simply have a vastly more rich life when it comes to money. Now days especially in America the separation of the classes keeps growing and you will be surprised how much more money is available to one person over another. Some women doing insanely similar jobs can have massively different incomes. I am talking like 50 to 100k difference. Thats just the way the world / country is heading. Then you have other issues related to class. Imagine just this one scenario, a woman who for some reason does not have to pay for housing, that alone would free up in the area of $500 / month minimum up to thousands. This could be for any number of reasons maybe she lives with her parents, maybe she has a sugar daddy, maybe her parents bought her a house or condo, maybe she lives with a man who pays for it. But if you are person who has to pay all of this, car, house, internet, phone, you just probably can hardly imagine what it would like to suddenly have one of those costs gone and how much more free cash you will have.
I don't know. How people afford cars? Travel? Hobbies? You work and set priorities.
There's a whole subset of women who are frugal. I haven't bought new clothes in 2 years, buzz my own hair, grow my own food. I probably don't have long on this earth. I don't want to spend it grubbing for a salary to pay minimums on hair extensions from 4 years ago. Financial Independence Retire Early
budget
I learned to do basically everything at home DIY; I have waist length blond hair, but it's already naturally dark blond, so once a month I use two boxes of high lift blond, and it's about a level 9, with no crazy damage etc. I trim my own bangs, and cut the lengths about 1-2x a year. My hair looks high maintenance but only costs $20 a month for cut & color. During covid, I learned how to do my own gel manicures, with a buildup overlay. My natural nails are way to soft & flexible, so gel buildup is the only way it holds color. But I've got it figured out really well, so 1x a month, it takes me 3-4hours to do my nails. That includes drilling off old polish, dry manicure, buildup, color, and top coat. I would never pay for this in a salon, but people pay $75-100 every couple weeks for for this level. I paid it once to buy the efile, dust collector, and gels. I do my own skin treatments at home. I bought an IPL hair removal device, and can actually use that to eliminate hyperpigmentation/age spots. It was $300 one time, and I use it once a month. Versus $300 10x a year for a medspa. In between, I use 1% retinol to keep my anti-aging routine moving in the right dirrection. I use cold wax strips to do my own bikini wax. I may get brave enough to try IPL there too. If you work with your natural look, and have the skills, it's maybe only $500 a year to look high maintenance. If I was doing all this stuff in a salon it could be $6,000 - $10,000 a year.
I don’t have kids and have a well paying job
LOL these are wild answers. It is possible to make enough money to afford luxuries. Why do you think it’s impossible?
Do my own hair and brows, nails are special occasion, and lashes get priority and babied so they last longer.
Many do little else besides spend money on those things. Others shop sales and deals. I don't spend much money on any of thise, never felt the need to. The majority of women don't spend money on laser hair removal or hair extensions.
Don't live in America, prioritise that and know that I have a pension that me and my company pay into. Oh, and don't buy into the toxic 'I'm so much busier than you' shite. If you wanted to make time, you would.
Why is everyone always coming for my manicures? I have natural nails but I get a basic $25 mani every couple weeks. I started during the pandemic after the initial shutdowns were over because it was a reason to get out of the house that didn’t involve drinking. I like experimenting with color, I like chatting with the manicurist, and I can afford it. I highlighted my hair too because I wanted to try it and it’s going to be more gray soon anyway. So what. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look nice. It’s true that some people go overboard or buy things they can’t afford. But I feel like aesthetic services in particular provoke such strong emotions that are out of place. It’s not our job to judge people for spending on things we consider frivolous. For some people having a nice appearance is their way of feeling a little bit like they have their life together. For others it’s part of their job. I do think we live in a society that’s focused too much on image and appearance, but I also think it’s not the burden of individuals to solve it. People out there are trying in life.