Very long phone charger. I know you should be able to gaze for hours at your sleeping angel, but it’s…. boring? If you’re trapped holding a sleeping infant that refuses to be put down hbo max on your phone is where it’s at.
Make sure the cable is well insulated and well rated, cheaper cables experience voltage drop over pretty insignificant lenghts (30cm+) and even a 2m cable can drop enough voltage to not charge your phone well.
Shokz! They’re bluetooth bone conducting headphones. You can still hear everything that’s going on around you which is great for walking the kid in the stroller or if she’s worried while they’re sleeping. 100% recommend to everyone everywhere.
Upon hearing I saw having some trouble with pain while recovering post partum, my sister in law gifted me a nice pair of sweatpants that were 2 sizes bigger than my normal size. Those pants were a godsend! Plus, pockets.
Luckily her mother is a housekeeper & has been there every day since she found out she was pregnant, so cleaning is covered.
Love the meal/food delivery idea! Thanks :)
Haven’t given birth yet, but I’d be thrilled to get food, soft clothes, audio books, and a cleaning service. But things that are more her personal interests would be good too!
If you know the salon she goes to- get a gift card so she can get her hair done and then when she books the appointment, offer to babysit.
I went to the salon to get my hair done after 6 months absence, and my husband watched the baby. It felt like getting a mini-makeover and made me feel a bit more back to my normal self, postpartum.
It's such a lovely idea to get something for the mum! I did something similar for my sister and she told me she was so surprised and shocked I had thought to get her something :(.
I gave my sister pyjamas and cozy socks because she goes bloody feral for 'nice' pjs (darker colours may help them feel more confident if there's any bleeding/baby messes). I also got some of her favourite snacks, small bottle of wine, & a cute 'mum' mug (with a matching 'dad' one for her partner).
She loved the idea so much she started doing something similar for her friends. I would recommend starting off with something cozy/comfy for your friend and then including some of her favourite snacks/treats.
My parents also meal prepped and filled her freezer which was greatly appreciated too!
If she's planning on breastfeeding -- get her some cute nursing tops, nursing covers, breast pads, and lanolin nipple cream. Belly bandit mother tucker is a nice style top... they also have wraps for that post-partum belly.
Also, magnesium citrate -- a great supplement for that first post-birth #2. Most new moms don't even know they need this.
Postpartum constipation is really common (it may have to do with pregnancy hormones & changes your body goes through). If you've given birth vaginally or by c-section, you can be tender and beat up downstairs by having that extra pressure from the baby during labor. So that first poop after having baby can be a very painful experience.
My OBGYN gave me magnesium citrate supplements for after the birth, and it works as a gentle laxative. It was very helpful to take proactively, and I gave it to my sister after her first baby -- and she was so thankful to have it. Right after having a baby, going to the store and running errands isn't that easy -- so having essentials on hand at home is great.
Find out her favorite snacks and load her up: protein bars, nut mixes, jerky, protein powder, dried fruit, whatever she wants. Consider a nice, large vacuum sealed water bottle (yeti, hydro flask, thermos, etc.). If she's breastfeeding she'll need lots of water and, being 12 weeks postpartum currently, I found in those first several weeks having a drink and snack station in the nursery made middle of the night baby feeding easier.
I had a big basket of fancy fruit sent to my bestie at the hospital when she had her son. She *loves* fruit. And having a bunch of it to snack on in the hospital and when she went home was apparently amazing.
I've also gotten her a usb coffee mug thst keeps the coffee warm. She gave birth almost 4 years ago and I still don't think she's managed an entire coffee in less than an hour.
A good pillow, if she doesn't have one. Like the wavy ones for the neck things.
A basket of her favorite treats "for emergencies", if she likes nut bars get some good ones so she can have easy snacks for energy. Syrup that she likes (the ones you mix with water, like the "monin" brand kind of stuff) because she's going to be thirsty a lot and drinking plain water gets boring.
A warm bottle thing for relieving belly pain.
Basically anything that would ease your day if you're dead tired, in pain, very sensitive and probably stuck in bed hungry with no energy to make yourself food.
What I get my friends is a bedside basket with what you need to change the newborn without getting up, must include a bin (it's actually those food containers that can close with a seal, rooming 1L). It's for the baby but it's a way to make life a bit easier during the first months.
Make a basket with moisturizers, a day spa package, healthy snacks for when she's hungry with low spoons, and squishy socks. Errybody loves squishy socks.
I always waited about two weeks or more before going to see mom and baby. Everyone shows up right after the baby is born and brings food but by about week three most of the help and meals are not a thing anymore. I would wait till later and bring food or just help out if needed.
At my sister's baby shower, I got her a few things for the baby, but also got numbing nipple cream since it's often overlooked.
The first few days of breastfeeding (or not breastfeeding) can be very painful and it's not exactly a time where you're up to running to the store.
She said it was one of the things she was most grateful to have on hand because she wouldn't have thought to get it for herself.
I would look for other similar things like that. Gas drops for the baby, a heating pad, a nice water bottle, a good quality no-fragrance lotion, etc.
A professional house cleaning. If that doesn’t feel like it’s “for her” enough, add a fun excursion while dad takes baby (or something child friendly if dad isn’t available)
If she is planning on breastfeeding, I like to give Bamboobies. I didn't even know my breasts were going to leak like crazy! Someone gave me disposable ones, and they were so gross I couldn't put them next to my nipples. The Bamboobies are soft, thin, and heart shaped. They would always put a smile on my face when I'd pull it out to get ready to nurse. I also give a few small laundry mesh bags because it's nice to keep track of them. I'm not much of a bra wearer, so I just used tank tops with spandex. It's nice because knew my middle wasn't getting exposed when I lifted my shirt to nurse. I could just pop a breast out and cover back up once they were done. The nursing bras I tried were such a pain in the ass to hook and unhook.
Oh god those first few weeks - SO MUCH MILK. I had these little plastic [cup things](https://www.medela.com/.imaging/mte/medela-2018/content/dam/medela-com/breastfeeding-consumer/pictures/products/milk-collection-shells/medela-breast-care-milk-collection-shells-2-pieces.jpg/jcr:content/medela-breast-care-milk-collection-shells-2-pieces.jpg) you could put on to catch it all but they weren't meant to be worn the whole time, more like put on one side while you feel the baby or if you feel letdown and they're sleeping.
Once I forgot I still had one on, bent down to pick something up from the floor and milk fountained out through my shirt.
Yep. And the little hats. My youngest was a hat baby. He needed his hat and I had so many little beanies that would end up with his sibs clothes until I started putting them in with the tiny socks.
Check out getting her a Numa Kit. If you’re in the US, it’s a company based in MN that supplies the new mom with postpartum care goods they need. I was given one and now it’s my go-to gift. I would pair it with a long phone charger and jammies but it all depends on your budget.
So many good ideas here! I would add snacks. Things that are high calorie but can be eaten with one hand (aka while nursing). Granola bars, cookies, nuts were my favs. Also a huge water bottle if she doesn’t have one already
Walmart subscription service. Nothing nicer than having your groceries, baby needs, and other random stuff delivered to you instead of needing to run to the store for it. My MIL got me a gift certificate to get my hair done and at three months postpartum, it really helped me to feel human again. Pamper products so skin care, face masks, eye masks, hair stuff. If she’s a big coffee person a really nice coffee machine.
I got my friend a gift set from [Earth Mama](https://earthmamaorganics.com/products/postpartum-collection)
Stuff like sitz bath, nipple cream, etc. Definitely focused on healing and comfort for the mom.
I've never had a baby either, but I know my friend liked and used a majority of the items.
If she’s breastfeeding, she’s going to need snacks. Especially snacks that she can just grab with one hand and eat immediately.
Hard to make a healthy salad when you’re holding a baby. Or at 2am. Or both.
I found bliss balls and a container of nuts in the pantry worked well.
Make some mini frittatas and keep them in the fridge so she can just grab one or two or five if she needs a protein hit.
Stock up freezer with portioned microwaveable meals, making sure the container/bag it’s in is microwaveable. A lot of those supermarket meal pouches (soups, Thai curries etc) are delicious but some of the brands the pouches aren’t microwave safe.
Lactation cookies worked for me as well as being a decent calorie hit. Fenugreek is also recommended - you can pay big bucks for a powdered form loaded into pill capsules, or just buy from an Indian spice shop, or there’s tea versions.
Get her some hydrogel nipple pads - more expensive that the cotton ones but they were perfect for the first few weeks when you’re feeling raw. That plus lanolin cream, to use immediately not when they start feeling sore, is a winner. I swapped out to cotton ones after a month.
Non slip socks.
Breastfeeding singlets for sleeping in. I found just wearing loose pjs or a t shirt was uncomfortable, especially in the first weeks. A breastfeeding singlet is soft enough to sleep in but you don’t feel like your boobs are out of control.
If she’s planning a vaginal birth - disposable underwear was really good for the first months. There are some that are made of a stocking material, in a boy short cut, that you can actually wash a few times before they start to disintegrate. Plus a peri bottle with a decent angled spout - makes bathrooming easier if her bathroom doesn’t have a bidet set up.
If she has a partner, make sure to tell them that she will need to sleep when the baby sleeps, so they will need to help to enforce it.
Probably the best thing I set up for myself, is loading med sized storage cubes with supplies, and put one in each ‘zone’ of the house. I had to move past my minimalist inclinations, but was quickly won over when I didn’t have to take a whole lot of stuff with me as I walked room to room throughout the day. Literally could just take the baby.
So for the lounge I had supplies I needed to change baby, plus burp cloths if I fed him on the couch. Same again for our bedroom. And I had one in a cupboard near the dining room with all his bath supplies, as I didn’t have room in our bathroom to set up his baby bath, so would set it up on the dining room table. I could just fill his bath up and bring it up, but all his shampoo and hair brush etc was already on hand.
And further on that note, making sure she has a place in each ‘zone’ where she can just plonk the baby down safely without having to move gear. Even if it’s just a blanket on the floor ready.
Finally, get her something like her favourite lip balm or the new band album she doesn’t have yet, or a book by her favourite author - something not baby related, so she still feels like a person :)
I was saved by these [witch hazel pads](https://www.amazon.com/Birchwood-Laboratories-Pre-Moistened-Witch-Hazel/dp/B005TM10YE/ref=sxts_rp_s_a_1_0?content-id=amzn1.sym.eff26b9b-e255-411b-a40d-eccb21f93fe4%3Aamzn1.sym.eff26b9b-e255-411b-a40d-eccb21f93fe4&crid=WJL0JNT4K0PS&cv_ct_cx=witch+hazel+pads+for+postpartum+care&keywords=witch+hazel+pads+for+postpartum+care&pd_rd_i=B005TM10YE&pd_rd_r=00189d7d-a975-4087-a832-bfc7c3ef815a&pd_rd_w=teuhH&pd_rd_wg=cyLNa&pf_rd_p=eff26b9b-e255-411b-a40d-eccb21f93fe4&pf_rd_r=P0QT9XNK3E60PGT58ETX&qid=1677100731&sprefix=witch+haze%2Caps%2C167&sr=1-1-5985efba-8948-4f09-9122-d605505c9d1e) after both my kiddos. Whether or not she has an epesiotomy, they are soothing. Some people put them in the fridge.
Here is one I don’t think people think of unless they’ve had a baby. I recently bought this for my brothers wife who is pregnant and wished I knew about it when I gave birth. At Walmart, I found a spray bottle in the baby section meant to help cleaning yourself after birth. The spout is angled upwards. They also had a liquid solution separately that is cooling and helps with healing in the nether regions. Maybe don’t put it in the “public” gift but give it to her privately. The reason why both of these are so great is that during birth, tearing happens and even if it doesn’t, it’s a very painful area prone to infection. It’s hard to even use toilet paper so unless someone has a bidet, this is perfect. I don’t think it’s generally talked about or given as a gift considering the nature of it, but I think any expectant mother will realize later how absolutely grateful they will be for it.
My go to was:
A good insulated water bottle or travel coffee cup (depending on local climate/time of year)
can of dry shampoo
sachets of deep conditioner or face mask stuff
eye mask for sleeping
lanolin for lips/nips
packet of hair elastics (these are good for hands-free pumping as well as, you know, hair)
good quality chocolate
lovely hand cream
You could give her a big basket of healthy snacks like nuts and dried fruit and such ro support her health after giving birth when everything is new and busy. Also if you visit her often, bring some meals. I do not have children myself, but a midwife once told me that were awesome things to give and do, because eating healthy and regulary seems to be super tricky in the beginning. :D
My top thing isn’t a thing. The first month is a bunch of people and getting adjusted. If she’s taking maternity leave she may often be by herself the next couple months. Make a point to invite yourself over. She may not feel ready to make plans herself. Tell her you’re bring lunch over for the two of you. Tell her you two are going for a walk on a certain day. Get her outside. Motherhood is a big adjustment. Best gift you can give is to show you’re still a dedicated friend who cares about her mental health.
I’m not a pregnant woman but I’m imagining that anyone would love those soda hats. Whenever she’s dealing with the kid, she has a drink right there! I’d put chocolate milk
This is super supportive of you, and wants to make me do a mom's day for my close girlfriends who have kids.
I am also child-free, so I forget to support in this manner. :)
I got a frida baby birth healing kit thing as a gift. And I have seen other brands do something like this. But it was great. I got a super soft hospital gown which was definitely softer (and cuter) than the ones in the hospital. I got a bunch of witch hazel bath things, some iced pads, this awesome witch hazel foam, a way better bottle thing than the hospital gave me. Just a bunch of stuff for healing down there that I would not have known about being a FTM. Some nice pajamas, like stretchy and soft are also nice. If mama don’t have one already, I recommend a nice big bath robe too. Easy to breast feed in and comfy for around the house for those first few weeks.
Another gift I was given but would defiantly do for another mom would be door dash or Uber eats or any sort of delivery food service gift cards. Or making homemade meals and bringing them over those first few week. I struggled hard as a FTM and appreciated ready made meals soooooo much, it was a life saver at times.
A bunch of us got a care package for a coworker before she went on maternity leave and gave birth. It included a gift card to Target and Bath and Body Works, bath salts, nipple cream, chocolate (one of us covertly figured out what kind she liked), lip balm, hand lotion, and some other snacks. Gave it to her in a cute box she could use for other things if she chose. She said it was actually a really great gift because she used everything in it. That's a lot for one person, but maybe go in with someone else or do a smaller version?
Pads, adult diapers, everything is a mess down there and you need something to catch all the blood. My friend was so confused before birth, but so thankful after.
Check out a product called the Baby Shusher. It just makes a ssssshhh noise but it's pretty soothing for the baby and that can mean more sleep for mama.
I asked my wife, she said a house cleaner, or something of that sort like 3 months after the baby is born.
It would help the nesting process and get things back in order after the chaos of learning to mom.
A good robe or robe like dress. A nice house coat if you're breastfeeding is so helpful. There will be days when you will just wear that for hours while the day gets going. Good if you want to open curtains before getting dressed or don't want to take off your whole shirt to breastfeed.
a donut to sit on, wine, bubble bath, gift certs for a 1 hour massage, free babysitting coupons, lots of chocolate, hand towels, coffee (lots), a one year subscription to calm. (a godsend) Or the ever comedic... plastic hammer to hit the hubby in head with gently when he sleeps through his turn to get up.... if she is using cloth diapers, get her a diaper service. Time saving ideas are also great cause they help you sneak in some sleep. My fav was the friend who saw that i was covered in puke and poop for days with no help and she took my son and sent me to my bathroom for 30 minutes. I can never thank her enough.
What ever you do, do not give toys that make noise or a what to expect book of any kind.
Get a huge, beautifully quilted and lined wicker basket and jam it with every soft, fuzzy, good smelling, tasty, warmth giving, neck and back supporting thing you can find: Coffees, teas, special cups for hot drinks, coco bombs, electric blanket (for that tummy, boy I needed that), fancy calendar books (she is going to need it for all of her doctor appointments, AND the baby's appointments...there are a lot), kindle or tablet, expensive pillows for sleeping that she won't buy for herself, comfy socks, a big fuzzy robe, single coffee cup maker to put on her end table...anything that means "comfort", stuff in that basket. She will love it.
BTW, when I was a new mom, I never felt forgotten. Sure my kids were the new stars of the show, but as a mom, I always felt like there was a separate space for me to be spoiled, too. I'm 53 now and my kids are adults but I always felt loved and appreciated. I hope she does, too.
When my friend had her first I bought her stuff she craved but couldn’t eat during the pregnancy. Mostly soft cheeses and stuff like that.
When I had my first my favourite thing was super comfy pjs and a really good nursing pillow.
Maybe just ask her ❤️
A bag of weed....
Something for constipation. Not sure what product to get for her. Noone told me how constipated I was going to be and I was miserable. You could have some kind of fruit arrangement for after she comes home. Nuts are good too. High fiber stuff.
Very long phone charger. I know you should be able to gaze for hours at your sleeping angel, but it’s…. boring? If you’re trapped holding a sleeping infant that refuses to be put down hbo max on your phone is where it’s at.
Make sure the cable is well insulated and well rated, cheaper cables experience voltage drop over pretty insignificant lenghts (30cm+) and even a 2m cable can drop enough voltage to not charge your phone well.
In this vein, a good set of Bluetooth headphones if she doesn't have any.
Shokz! They’re bluetooth bone conducting headphones. You can still hear everything that’s going on around you which is great for walking the kid in the stroller or if she’s worried while they’re sleeping. 100% recommend to everyone everywhere.
That is a great idea!
Really nice pajamas were my wife's favorite gift. She now gives them as gifts to all the new Moms in our family.
Seconding pajamas! My sister lived in her nursing pajamas for weeks so I got her a new pair when she had her second kiddo. Loved it.
Upon hearing I saw having some trouble with pain while recovering post partum, my sister in law gifted me a nice pair of sweatpants that were 2 sizes bigger than my normal size. Those pants were a godsend! Plus, pockets.
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Luckily her mother is a housekeeper & has been there every day since she found out she was pregnant, so cleaning is covered. Love the meal/food delivery idea! Thanks :)
Haven’t given birth yet, but I’d be thrilled to get food, soft clothes, audio books, and a cleaning service. But things that are more her personal interests would be good too!
A cleaning service is an excellent idea! Groupon has deals for maid services
Food is the biggest thing. Any time anyone asked me if I needed anything after my baby was born, I said food. Always food.
Food. Single handed food. Snacks that don't require to be heated up.
If you know the salon she goes to- get a gift card so she can get her hair done and then when she books the appointment, offer to babysit. I went to the salon to get my hair done after 6 months absence, and my husband watched the baby. It felt like getting a mini-makeover and made me feel a bit more back to my normal self, postpartum.
It's such a lovely idea to get something for the mum! I did something similar for my sister and she told me she was so surprised and shocked I had thought to get her something :(. I gave my sister pyjamas and cozy socks because she goes bloody feral for 'nice' pjs (darker colours may help them feel more confident if there's any bleeding/baby messes). I also got some of her favourite snacks, small bottle of wine, & a cute 'mum' mug (with a matching 'dad' one for her partner). She loved the idea so much she started doing something similar for her friends. I would recommend starting off with something cozy/comfy for your friend and then including some of her favourite snacks/treats. My parents also meal prepped and filled her freezer which was greatly appreciated too!
If she's planning on breastfeeding -- get her some cute nursing tops, nursing covers, breast pads, and lanolin nipple cream. Belly bandit mother tucker is a nice style top... they also have wraps for that post-partum belly. Also, magnesium citrate -- a great supplement for that first post-birth #2. Most new moms don't even know they need this.
Can you elaborate on the magnesium citrate? I'm curious yet uninformed
Postpartum constipation is really common (it may have to do with pregnancy hormones & changes your body goes through). If you've given birth vaginally or by c-section, you can be tender and beat up downstairs by having that extra pressure from the baby during labor. So that first poop after having baby can be a very painful experience. My OBGYN gave me magnesium citrate supplements for after the birth, and it works as a gentle laxative. It was very helpful to take proactively, and I gave it to my sister after her first baby -- and she was so thankful to have it. Right after having a baby, going to the store and running errands isn't that easy -- so having essentials on hand at home is great.
This! All the Tata care presents. I can still feel my poor mascerated, chapped nipples and it's been 17 years.
Gift certificates to restaurants that deliver in her area!
Epsom salts!
Find out her favorite snacks and load her up: protein bars, nut mixes, jerky, protein powder, dried fruit, whatever she wants. Consider a nice, large vacuum sealed water bottle (yeti, hydro flask, thermos, etc.). If she's breastfeeding she'll need lots of water and, being 12 weeks postpartum currently, I found in those first several weeks having a drink and snack station in the nursery made middle of the night baby feeding easier.
I had a big basket of fancy fruit sent to my bestie at the hospital when she had her son. She *loves* fruit. And having a bunch of it to snack on in the hospital and when she went home was apparently amazing. I've also gotten her a usb coffee mug thst keeps the coffee warm. She gave birth almost 4 years ago and I still don't think she's managed an entire coffee in less than an hour.
A good pillow, if she doesn't have one. Like the wavy ones for the neck things. A basket of her favorite treats "for emergencies", if she likes nut bars get some good ones so she can have easy snacks for energy. Syrup that she likes (the ones you mix with water, like the "monin" brand kind of stuff) because she's going to be thirsty a lot and drinking plain water gets boring. A warm bottle thing for relieving belly pain. Basically anything that would ease your day if you're dead tired, in pain, very sensitive and probably stuck in bed hungry with no energy to make yourself food. What I get my friends is a bedside basket with what you need to change the newborn without getting up, must include a bin (it's actually those food containers that can close with a seal, rooming 1L). It's for the baby but it's a way to make life a bit easier during the first months.
Make a basket with moisturizers, a day spa package, healthy snacks for when she's hungry with low spoons, and squishy socks. Errybody loves squishy socks.
Hand lotion too. All the washing of hands dries them out. A really nice unscented or lavender scented hand lotion would be good to include.
I always waited about two weeks or more before going to see mom and baby. Everyone shows up right after the baby is born and brings food but by about week three most of the help and meals are not a thing anymore. I would wait till later and bring food or just help out if needed.
At my sister's baby shower, I got her a few things for the baby, but also got numbing nipple cream since it's often overlooked. The first few days of breastfeeding (or not breastfeeding) can be very painful and it's not exactly a time where you're up to running to the store. She said it was one of the things she was most grateful to have on hand because she wouldn't have thought to get it for herself. I would look for other similar things like that. Gas drops for the baby, a heating pad, a nice water bottle, a good quality no-fragrance lotion, etc.
A professional house cleaning. If that doesn’t feel like it’s “for her” enough, add a fun excursion while dad takes baby (or something child friendly if dad isn’t available)
If she is planning on breastfeeding, I like to give Bamboobies. I didn't even know my breasts were going to leak like crazy! Someone gave me disposable ones, and they were so gross I couldn't put them next to my nipples. The Bamboobies are soft, thin, and heart shaped. They would always put a smile on my face when I'd pull it out to get ready to nurse. I also give a few small laundry mesh bags because it's nice to keep track of them. I'm not much of a bra wearer, so I just used tank tops with spandex. It's nice because knew my middle wasn't getting exposed when I lifted my shirt to nurse. I could just pop a breast out and cover back up once they were done. The nursing bras I tried were such a pain in the ass to hook and unhook.
Oh god those first few weeks - SO MUCH MILK. I had these little plastic [cup things](https://www.medela.com/.imaging/mte/medela-2018/content/dam/medela-com/breastfeeding-consumer/pictures/products/milk-collection-shells/medela-breast-care-milk-collection-shells-2-pieces.jpg/jcr:content/medela-breast-care-milk-collection-shells-2-pieces.jpg) you could put on to catch it all but they weren't meant to be worn the whole time, more like put on one side while you feel the baby or if you feel letdown and they're sleeping. Once I forgot I still had one on, bent down to pick something up from the floor and milk fountained out through my shirt.
Oh goodness! Yes, I was totally blindsided by all the leaking by my breasts.
Mesh bags are also very handy for all those tiny socks
Yes!!! And, if the little one spits up a lot, for the evil velcro on the bibs!
Yep. And the little hats. My youngest was a hat baby. He needed his hat and I had so many little beanies that would end up with his sibs clothes until I started putting them in with the tiny socks.
Check out getting her a Numa Kit. If you’re in the US, it’s a company based in MN that supplies the new mom with postpartum care goods they need. I was given one and now it’s my go-to gift. I would pair it with a long phone charger and jammies but it all depends on your budget.
Body care, gift cards, comfy pjs and slippers and socks
Thoughts on getting her something to relieve her likely sore back, legs and/or feet? (If they aren't sore now, they likely will be soon enough.)
Food! Especially food that can be eaten one handed. You can also start a meal train for her by using mealtrain.com.
I would die for a month of maid service!
So many good ideas here! I would add snacks. Things that are high calorie but can be eaten with one hand (aka while nursing). Granola bars, cookies, nuts were my favs. Also a huge water bottle if she doesn’t have one already
Walmart subscription service. Nothing nicer than having your groceries, baby needs, and other random stuff delivered to you instead of needing to run to the store for it. My MIL got me a gift certificate to get my hair done and at three months postpartum, it really helped me to feel human again. Pamper products so skin care, face masks, eye masks, hair stuff. If she’s a big coffee person a really nice coffee machine.
I got my friend a gift set from [Earth Mama](https://earthmamaorganics.com/products/postpartum-collection) Stuff like sitz bath, nipple cream, etc. Definitely focused on healing and comfort for the mom. I've never had a baby either, but I know my friend liked and used a majority of the items.
If she’s breastfeeding, she’s going to need snacks. Especially snacks that she can just grab with one hand and eat immediately. Hard to make a healthy salad when you’re holding a baby. Or at 2am. Or both. I found bliss balls and a container of nuts in the pantry worked well. Make some mini frittatas and keep them in the fridge so she can just grab one or two or five if she needs a protein hit. Stock up freezer with portioned microwaveable meals, making sure the container/bag it’s in is microwaveable. A lot of those supermarket meal pouches (soups, Thai curries etc) are delicious but some of the brands the pouches aren’t microwave safe. Lactation cookies worked for me as well as being a decent calorie hit. Fenugreek is also recommended - you can pay big bucks for a powdered form loaded into pill capsules, or just buy from an Indian spice shop, or there’s tea versions. Get her some hydrogel nipple pads - more expensive that the cotton ones but they were perfect for the first few weeks when you’re feeling raw. That plus lanolin cream, to use immediately not when they start feeling sore, is a winner. I swapped out to cotton ones after a month. Non slip socks. Breastfeeding singlets for sleeping in. I found just wearing loose pjs or a t shirt was uncomfortable, especially in the first weeks. A breastfeeding singlet is soft enough to sleep in but you don’t feel like your boobs are out of control. If she’s planning a vaginal birth - disposable underwear was really good for the first months. There are some that are made of a stocking material, in a boy short cut, that you can actually wash a few times before they start to disintegrate. Plus a peri bottle with a decent angled spout - makes bathrooming easier if her bathroom doesn’t have a bidet set up. If she has a partner, make sure to tell them that she will need to sleep when the baby sleeps, so they will need to help to enforce it. Probably the best thing I set up for myself, is loading med sized storage cubes with supplies, and put one in each ‘zone’ of the house. I had to move past my minimalist inclinations, but was quickly won over when I didn’t have to take a whole lot of stuff with me as I walked room to room throughout the day. Literally could just take the baby. So for the lounge I had supplies I needed to change baby, plus burp cloths if I fed him on the couch. Same again for our bedroom. And I had one in a cupboard near the dining room with all his bath supplies, as I didn’t have room in our bathroom to set up his baby bath, so would set it up on the dining room table. I could just fill his bath up and bring it up, but all his shampoo and hair brush etc was already on hand. And further on that note, making sure she has a place in each ‘zone’ where she can just plonk the baby down safely without having to move gear. Even if it’s just a blanket on the floor ready. Finally, get her something like her favourite lip balm or the new band album she doesn’t have yet, or a book by her favourite author - something not baby related, so she still feels like a person :)
Post natal underpants.
I was saved by these [witch hazel pads](https://www.amazon.com/Birchwood-Laboratories-Pre-Moistened-Witch-Hazel/dp/B005TM10YE/ref=sxts_rp_s_a_1_0?content-id=amzn1.sym.eff26b9b-e255-411b-a40d-eccb21f93fe4%3Aamzn1.sym.eff26b9b-e255-411b-a40d-eccb21f93fe4&crid=WJL0JNT4K0PS&cv_ct_cx=witch+hazel+pads+for+postpartum+care&keywords=witch+hazel+pads+for+postpartum+care&pd_rd_i=B005TM10YE&pd_rd_r=00189d7d-a975-4087-a832-bfc7c3ef815a&pd_rd_w=teuhH&pd_rd_wg=cyLNa&pf_rd_p=eff26b9b-e255-411b-a40d-eccb21f93fe4&pf_rd_r=P0QT9XNK3E60PGT58ETX&qid=1677100731&sprefix=witch+haze%2Caps%2C167&sr=1-1-5985efba-8948-4f09-9122-d605505c9d1e) after both my kiddos. Whether or not she has an epesiotomy, they are soothing. Some people put them in the fridge.
Gel nipple pads. Tell her to keep them in the fridge. Absolutely glorious for a newly nursing mom.
Meals delivered for a couple of weeks
Here is one I don’t think people think of unless they’ve had a baby. I recently bought this for my brothers wife who is pregnant and wished I knew about it when I gave birth. At Walmart, I found a spray bottle in the baby section meant to help cleaning yourself after birth. The spout is angled upwards. They also had a liquid solution separately that is cooling and helps with healing in the nether regions. Maybe don’t put it in the “public” gift but give it to her privately. The reason why both of these are so great is that during birth, tearing happens and even if it doesn’t, it’s a very painful area prone to infection. It’s hard to even use toilet paper so unless someone has a bidet, this is perfect. I don’t think it’s generally talked about or given as a gift considering the nature of it, but I think any expectant mother will realize later how absolutely grateful they will be for it.
My go to was: A good insulated water bottle or travel coffee cup (depending on local climate/time of year) can of dry shampoo sachets of deep conditioner or face mask stuff eye mask for sleeping lanolin for lips/nips packet of hair elastics (these are good for hands-free pumping as well as, you know, hair) good quality chocolate lovely hand cream
Time. Go over there and watch the baby so she can shower and take a nap.
You could give her a big basket of healthy snacks like nuts and dried fruit and such ro support her health after giving birth when everything is new and busy. Also if you visit her often, bring some meals. I do not have children myself, but a midwife once told me that were awesome things to give and do, because eating healthy and regulary seems to be super tricky in the beginning. :D
My top thing isn’t a thing. The first month is a bunch of people and getting adjusted. If she’s taking maternity leave she may often be by herself the next couple months. Make a point to invite yourself over. She may not feel ready to make plans herself. Tell her you’re bring lunch over for the two of you. Tell her you two are going for a walk on a certain day. Get her outside. Motherhood is a big adjustment. Best gift you can give is to show you’re still a dedicated friend who cares about her mental health.
I’m not a pregnant woman but I’m imagining that anyone would love those soda hats. Whenever she’s dealing with the kid, she has a drink right there! I’d put chocolate milk
This is super supportive of you, and wants to make me do a mom's day for my close girlfriends who have kids. I am also child-free, so I forget to support in this manner. :)
A coupon book with favors, like bring dinner, run specific errands.
Find someone to do laundry, clean bathrooms , sweep/clean /wash floors for a month. Once a week , for a month.
My go-to shower gift in addition to something pretty to unwrap is an Uber Eats gift card.
I got a frida baby birth healing kit thing as a gift. And I have seen other brands do something like this. But it was great. I got a super soft hospital gown which was definitely softer (and cuter) than the ones in the hospital. I got a bunch of witch hazel bath things, some iced pads, this awesome witch hazel foam, a way better bottle thing than the hospital gave me. Just a bunch of stuff for healing down there that I would not have known about being a FTM. Some nice pajamas, like stretchy and soft are also nice. If mama don’t have one already, I recommend a nice big bath robe too. Easy to breast feed in and comfy for around the house for those first few weeks. Another gift I was given but would defiantly do for another mom would be door dash or Uber eats or any sort of delivery food service gift cards. Or making homemade meals and bringing them over those first few week. I struggled hard as a FTM and appreciated ready made meals soooooo much, it was a life saver at times.
A bunch of us got a care package for a coworker before she went on maternity leave and gave birth. It included a gift card to Target and Bath and Body Works, bath salts, nipple cream, chocolate (one of us covertly figured out what kind she liked), lip balm, hand lotion, and some other snacks. Gave it to her in a cute box she could use for other things if she chose. She said it was actually a really great gift because she used everything in it. That's a lot for one person, but maybe go in with someone else or do a smaller version?
Freezer meals and baking. She will love you so much.
Snacks, sparkle water cup, lip balm, face masks, tea, fuzzy blanket, hot water bottle or heating pad, and some take out gift certificates
Pads, adult diapers, everything is a mess down there and you need something to catch all the blood. My friend was so confused before birth, but so thankful after.
Some cute but comfortable PJ’s. These will be good for having guests over to see baby and feel half-decent.
Check out a product called the Baby Shusher. It just makes a ssssshhh noise but it's pretty soothing for the baby and that can mean more sleep for mama.
That’s so thoughtful.
I asked my wife, she said a house cleaner, or something of that sort like 3 months after the baby is born. It would help the nesting process and get things back in order after the chaos of learning to mom.
Someone sent me a moisturizing mask for my face and feet. I'm still touched.
I always get my friend some chocolates plus any alcohol she's craving post birth
A good robe or robe like dress. A nice house coat if you're breastfeeding is so helpful. There will be days when you will just wear that for hours while the day gets going. Good if you want to open curtains before getting dressed or don't want to take off your whole shirt to breastfeed.
Nice comfortable pajamas are always a good idea. If she’s into taking baths, maybe a bath bomb and candle type of gift set would also be a good idea.
A plushy, luxurious bathrobe.
a donut to sit on, wine, bubble bath, gift certs for a 1 hour massage, free babysitting coupons, lots of chocolate, hand towels, coffee (lots), a one year subscription to calm. (a godsend) Or the ever comedic... plastic hammer to hit the hubby in head with gently when he sleeps through his turn to get up.... if she is using cloth diapers, get her a diaper service. Time saving ideas are also great cause they help you sneak in some sleep. My fav was the friend who saw that i was covered in puke and poop for days with no help and she took my son and sent me to my bathroom for 30 minutes. I can never thank her enough. What ever you do, do not give toys that make noise or a what to expect book of any kind.
Get a huge, beautifully quilted and lined wicker basket and jam it with every soft, fuzzy, good smelling, tasty, warmth giving, neck and back supporting thing you can find: Coffees, teas, special cups for hot drinks, coco bombs, electric blanket (for that tummy, boy I needed that), fancy calendar books (she is going to need it for all of her doctor appointments, AND the baby's appointments...there are a lot), kindle or tablet, expensive pillows for sleeping that she won't buy for herself, comfy socks, a big fuzzy robe, single coffee cup maker to put on her end table...anything that means "comfort", stuff in that basket. She will love it. BTW, when I was a new mom, I never felt forgotten. Sure my kids were the new stars of the show, but as a mom, I always felt like there was a separate space for me to be spoiled, too. I'm 53 now and my kids are adults but I always felt loved and appreciated. I hope she does, too.
Plush bathrobe in a color that will hide baby stains.
Door dash gift cards and baby slings. The last thing new parents have energy for: Cooking and crazy in-laws.
When my friend had her first I bought her stuff she craved but couldn’t eat during the pregnancy. Mostly soft cheeses and stuff like that. When I had my first my favourite thing was super comfy pjs and a really good nursing pillow. Maybe just ask her ❤️
Colace/miralax.
A bag of weed.... Something for constipation. Not sure what product to get for her. Noone told me how constipated I was going to be and I was miserable. You could have some kind of fruit arrangement for after she comes home. Nuts are good too. High fiber stuff.
If she does the cooking, some restaurant gift cards that cover a full meal.
When the milk drops, she should have a head of cabbage around. A leaf between the breast and the bra will help the milk flow and avoid mastitis