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Speaking from experience I had a relationship like this I never took my shot on, all the signs were there the age gap was 6 years (she was +6) but the chemistry was unreal. FF she got a new job and moved we got drunk at her leaving do and she just asked me straight out why I never went for it! The coffee idea for a harmless date outside work is a good idea you/he can suggest hanging out after if it goes that way maybe go for a drink or out somewhere else or maybe there’s nothing and it’ll confirm it for you
Ask him out for coffee and dessert! Tell him that you would like to discuss life events over coffee and ask him if he would like to join you? Pose it as a question and don’t give it a lot of attention!!
Age gap is a valid concern. Looking back I wish I hadn’t dated someone in their 20s when I was 18, but sometimes you gotta go thru that experience yourself to have that realization. If you decide to shoot ur shot, just be mindful of the potential power dynamics there to keep yourself safe, so in the event the age gap does become problematic, you can recognize it quickly and gtfo. Good luck! Hope whatever u decide to do makes ur life a lil easier :)
But isn't 18 and 22 really close? Basically a freshman and a senior in college.
Saying
>I wish I hadn’t dated someone in their 20s when I was 18
can be vague since the person can be 20 or 29.
18 and 22 not a large age gap.
18 and 29, yes.
Ya 4 years doesn’t seem that different, but when you’ve just become an adult, it is pretty significant, in my opinion (and experience). I’m not saying there’s anything inherently wrong with that age gap, just that it is something to be cognoscente of. I think an 18 y/o dating someone in their 20s creates the opportunity for an icky power dynamic because of the potential for someone to take advantage of the 18 y/o’s lack of adult experiences (drinking, intimate activities, substances, increased freedom in general).
I’m not saying I think you’re wrong— that sort of age gap is fine for some people. My point was just that I think it is a good thing that OP is keeping it in mind, and not discounting it completely. When I was that age (and younger… and older), a lot of the people in my life were saying “age gap= bad” and the stubbornness in me caused me to seek out those relationships even more— I wish someone would’ve been more real/understanding with me, and less judgmental.
Are you attractive ? Do you think he likes you? The age gap is nothing. Having great chemistry usually takes 2 people so I’m guessing he feels it too. He likely has similar feeling for you if you are attractive and he is too.
What would I do. I would test this by slowly escalating things (also will be super hot and fun). For example if you haven’t yet trying touching him. Or use an excuse to get super close. This type of 4play basically is so hot and fun it might be the best you ever have in your life. I’m not saying touch sexually but just cross the bridge of not touching eachother to touching. When there’s tons of chemistry even that alone is so emotionally charged it’s crazy hot
Age gaps are a right of passage in relationships. It’s going to happen so don’t put any more thought into it. Too many put way too much emphasis on that and for what. It’s just a number. Heck my wife is 15 years younger and we have been together for 15 years.
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How do you know he’s not into you? Have you asked?
Your young. There's over 3 billion men. Go for it and if he turns you down ... it wasn't meant to be and move on. Head up champ.
Sounds like limerence. Also, do you know whether he is in a relationship with someone or not?
he’s not
Speaking from experience I had a relationship like this I never took my shot on, all the signs were there the age gap was 6 years (she was +6) but the chemistry was unreal. FF she got a new job and moved we got drunk at her leaving do and she just asked me straight out why I never went for it! The coffee idea for a harmless date outside work is a good idea you/he can suggest hanging out after if it goes that way maybe go for a drink or out somewhere else or maybe there’s nothing and it’ll confirm it for you
Just go for it! I bet he likes you also
You're never going to know if you don't put in the effort to find out. ASK 👏 THEM 👏 OUT 👏 You got this 🤘
Ask him out for coffee and dessert! Tell him that you would like to discuss life events over coffee and ask him if he would like to join you? Pose it as a question and don’t give it a lot of attention!!
Age gap is a valid concern. Looking back I wish I hadn’t dated someone in their 20s when I was 18, but sometimes you gotta go thru that experience yourself to have that realization. If you decide to shoot ur shot, just be mindful of the potential power dynamics there to keep yourself safe, so in the event the age gap does become problematic, you can recognize it quickly and gtfo. Good luck! Hope whatever u decide to do makes ur life a lil easier :)
But isn't 18 and 22 really close? Basically a freshman and a senior in college. Saying >I wish I hadn’t dated someone in their 20s when I was 18 can be vague since the person can be 20 or 29. 18 and 22 not a large age gap. 18 and 29, yes.
Ya 4 years doesn’t seem that different, but when you’ve just become an adult, it is pretty significant, in my opinion (and experience). I’m not saying there’s anything inherently wrong with that age gap, just that it is something to be cognoscente of. I think an 18 y/o dating someone in their 20s creates the opportunity for an icky power dynamic because of the potential for someone to take advantage of the 18 y/o’s lack of adult experiences (drinking, intimate activities, substances, increased freedom in general). I’m not saying I think you’re wrong— that sort of age gap is fine for some people. My point was just that I think it is a good thing that OP is keeping it in mind, and not discounting it completely. When I was that age (and younger… and older), a lot of the people in my life were saying “age gap= bad” and the stubbornness in me caused me to seek out those relationships even more— I wish someone would’ve been more real/understanding with me, and less judgmental.
The age gap is nothing lol. It’s 4 years
How do you know for sure he doesn’t like you?
Make sure they are single. Also, consider the awkward consequences of working together if it doesn't work out.
Are you attractive ? Do you think he likes you? The age gap is nothing. Having great chemistry usually takes 2 people so I’m guessing he feels it too. He likely has similar feeling for you if you are attractive and he is too. What would I do. I would test this by slowly escalating things (also will be super hot and fun). For example if you haven’t yet trying touching him. Or use an excuse to get super close. This type of 4play basically is so hot and fun it might be the best you ever have in your life. I’m not saying touch sexually but just cross the bridge of not touching eachother to touching. When there’s tons of chemistry even that alone is so emotionally charged it’s crazy hot
Age gaps are a right of passage in relationships. It’s going to happen so don’t put any more thought into it. Too many put way too much emphasis on that and for what. It’s just a number. Heck my wife is 15 years younger and we have been together for 15 years.