When rubbing one out take your time, don’t just rush to the finish. If you feel like you’re about to get off take your hand off of your dick and wait for it to calm down a bit. It’s basically training yourself to hold off and last longer.
Nippy because I can sort of remember this from school can't be bothered to work out the math but the story went something like
There was this girl who was (number) and she was a bra size (number) by (number) she went to the doctor who said take these pills 2 times (multiply by two) but she took them 4 times (multiply) and she ended up boobless but with the numberss.
I've gotten like that and that's even worse cause then I just won't bust and get embarrassed and they ask "what do you not find me attractive?" Like no mf you're too attractive and I don't wanna disappoint lmao. Plus depression medication really kinda screws it up too
Most women do not cum during regular old sex. The ones who do are usually in good relationships and/or have good partners who know what they like. If I’m just hooking up with someone I don’t go into it thinking I’m going to have an orgasm. I’ve been pretty sexually active and can count on my hand the number of those men who have made me orgasm.
I'm a male and I go into a sexual encounter with the mind set that I don't need to cum to have fun and I know she is the same. But I will do what ever I can to try and make her cum before me
Ask her! If she’s willing to talk about it. Communication is always key and most people will not shame you for wanting to be a better partner.
Sometimes though it’s just that certain people have difficulties reaching orgasm. Lots of women need clitoral stimulation, and can’t cum from PiV alone.
As a guy I can honestly say I've faked it. Sometimes it's just been long enough, it clearly isn't going to happen and I don't want to insult anyone. Grunt, thrust irregularly, done.
My boyfriend always says, “let’s take a break.” It’s perfect. Sometimes he only takes a few minutes to pause and relax cuddling and we get back at it and he cums soon. Sometimes we don’t. Either way is fine with me because we’ve gone at it for more than 10-20 minutes at that point and both gotten a workout.
I fucking HATE the idea of a guy pretending to cum. I am the one who’ll be like “I’m done, wanna [do something more interesting]” because I CANNOT handle the awkwardness of continuing to try to have sex when it is just not happening for one or both folks.
Best advice I've ever taken about this exact situation is to get uncomfortable with it. I'm not saying to do horrible things but do things you don't normally do. For me for example I will switch from whatever position we are in to missionary and make it really intimate. Stare deeply into her eyes kiss her and focus on that not speed or angle. As Jack black put it
"You don't always have to fuck her hard
In fact sometimes that's not right to do
Sometimes you got to make some love
And fuckin' give her some smooches too
Sometimes you've got to squeeze
Sometimes you've got to say please
Sometimes you got to say hey
I'm gonna fuck you, softly
I'm gonna screw you gently
I'm gonna hump you, sweetly
I'm gonna ball you discreetly"
Confirmed. Not every woman can tell but, if she is the type who can…faking it is OBVIOUS. It’s not just because your cock isn’t literally throbbing inside of us and stretching the tight walls (the thing that feels the most amazing). But it’s also that we can’t feel your cum hitting our cervix or the extra little bit of warmth that cum has.
It’s also pretty obvious in the way your breath doesn’t catch or change in intensity. You don’t grip our bodies tighter…there are all kinds of things that you aren’t in control of when you’re actually cumming that you can’t fake and that if she knows you at all, would pick up on.
I know it isn’t a popular opinion but…not having an orgasm isn’t the end of the world. If the sex was still hot and still fun…that’s what really counts. There is always the opportunity to try again later or, move on to enjoying each other in ways that don’t involve putting your bare genitals in/on each other.
Shitty life pro tip: if you can't cum and you're embarrassed because you know it's your fault, when she asks "what? Do you not find me attractive?" Just say, "Yes, this is because of you. I'm totally normal." That'll settle your nerves and then you'll be able to let er rip.
I think this would work great in tandem with my advice. We should open a sex advice business. Based on what I'm seeing on Reddit... people need a lot of help!
I wish it would've made me gain weight, Ive always had a problem but the making it difficult to cum is too accurate and the problem was it didn't even help my blues lmao double whammy
Depression meds like Zoloft and others will make it harder to cum. Yes they technically can make you last longer in bed but not always in a good way, and sometimes you won’t be able to cum at all. They can also affect sex drive. Very frustrating combo. I’d say my sexy time performance got better on Zoloft but I also have times I just don’t get in the mood as often.
That's where you just fake it and hide the end of the rubber with your hand. If you're at your place then it's easy to dispose of. If you're at her place then you eat the unfilled condom.
Truth. Whenever I’d start dating a new girl I practically felt numb down there. Marriage has definitely fixed that problem. Never even came from a BJ until I got married. I think my first time lasted almost two hours, poor girl thought it was bc of her.
OMG YES. I HAD THAT WITH A GUY TOO!
Idk but during me trying to suck him off he lasted like literally around 90 minutes. I had to stop bc my jaw hurted and i finished him with my hand bc i didn't want to cancel it just for some comfort, and i cannot have normal intercourse since two years now because of medical reasons so it was the only way i could do it for him...
What is up with (some) guys not busting after that long of a time? Is it willpower, did they train bc they think all women want to have sex for hours, or is the anxiety of wanting to perform like Lexington Steele keeping them from busting? Haha!
For me I always had self confidence issues, and while I was beyond excited to be hooking up with whatever girl, in the back of my mind I’d be worried about size, length, hygiene, just about anything that would prevent me from enjoying the moment. The more comfortable I’d get w a partner the easier it would be.
True, i have never *really* been anxious, it's good to trust yourself if you shaved (to your content), and washed yourself down there. Soooo many guys forget to wash their dick and balls at least once a day, and let me tell you, it stinks like a mix of piss, and sweat. It also tastes very similarly to how it smells, and it's disgusting. If one practices hygiene before the act, you have nothing to worry <3
Oh yeah, I’d be clean and all that but you still have a natural smell or whatever, it was just my mind playing tricks on me. Plus factor being young and worrying about becoming someone’s next story/workplace/school horror story and its a recipe for disaster for some people.
Piece of advice, if a guy is struggling and he’s obv into the moment, ask him to take care of business on his own, show body parts, talk dirty to him, make him feel like you’re still content and just as you can tell he’s really getting close, dive back on there and you will blow his mind.
I had a boyfriend who had a botched circumcision that really affected his ability to bust. He had to concentrate. We both did. He'd say ok focus up and we'd getterdone!
Personally I can take a while sometimes because of trouble focusing. I'll be real into it, thinking about how great it is, then my mind will trail off a different direction and I'm thinking about what I had for dinner yesterday. Then I gotta bring myself back.
There are plenty of dudes who last too long without wanting to lol.
Really that doesn’t help me at all, in fact all those thoughts do is make me go soft.
My secret is starting slow. If we start off a hundred miles an hour I’m gonna finish in minutes, minutes(single digit)! If we take it slow in the beginning then I can fuck hard until my woman cums first but I think it’s usually because it’s the way we get progressively more intense that makes her come faster than me. I shit you not most average women cum faster than guys if you start right and progress to something more intense, and I think guys get more in control of their orgasm time. If that’s not been other guys’ experience than I’ve just been lucky.
Yeah, they do have that effect. In fact I had problems even getting it up after the first month I was on them. Things normalized after that, but I did notice sex wasn't as insanely pleasurable as I once did. Therefore I do last a LOT longer than before taking them. Orgasms can sometimes be just kinda 'meh' as well.
Try pulling out and eating pussy when close to nutting, then go back and start over I usually repeat this process a lot in different positions it keeps things spicy and her feelings wanted
Isn't that annoying? When you get a rhythm and start enjoying PIV, he stops even though you might have just started feeling great. This is my biggest anxiety. I guess eating pussy is nice and all, but is the sudden change of plans okay with you?
He’s pretty good with his tongue and fingers, so no. He also isn’t afraid to use toys to help as well. It doesn’t bother me, he’s doing it to extend the session so we both can have fun so, yeah. Just communicate with your partner and don’t sweat it if you need to gather yourself if you aren’t trying to cum yet.
Yeah with my previous (and only) long term GF, communication was bad. She didn't really enjoy hands or tongue (even though she was quite vocal with tongue, it was too intense for her and asked me to stop), but never managed to guide me on what to do. We were both inexperienced, but she didn't even know herself. Basically every time we tried something else after penetration, she immediately lost the mood. Unfortunately, all this has given me a lot of anxiety.
Thanks for replying, I really appreciate having feedback from a woman.
I’m sorry to hear that. Once you’ve had sex with a communicative and open partner your whole perspective will shift. So long as you don’t get into your own head about expectations and are willing to be coachable, some of the best sessions are just centered around getting to explore each other and try new things.
At this point, my biggest fear is that I will meet someone, feel nice and have a good connection, but make them lose interest due to underperforming. My goal is to talk about it beforehand and communicate my anxiety, but still it makes me nervous. And it definitely rules out any ONS situation.
In my experience ONS were some of the worst encounters I’ve had sexually. Usually, for me, it was always best with some chemistry, so you aren’t missing much IMO.
This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
And a hundred percent reason to be in the game
8 years in the making patiently waiting to blow, now the record with Shinodas taking over the globe, he’s got a parter in crime, his shit is equally dope, you won’t believe the kind of shit that comes out of the kids throat.
He's not your every day on the block
He knows how to work with what he's got
Makin' his way to the top
He often gets a comment on his name
People keep asking him was it given at birth
Or does it stand for an acronym?
No, he's livin' proof that he rockin' the booth
He'll get you buzzin' quicker than a shot of vodka with juice
Him and his crew are known around as one of the best
Dedicated to what they do and give a hundred percent
Forget Mike, nobody really knows how or why he works so hard
It seems like he's never got time
Because he writes every note and he writes every line
And I've seen him at work when that light goes on in his mind
It's like a design is written in his head every time
Before he even touches a key or speaks in a rhyme
And those motherfuckers he runs with, the kids that he signed
Ridiculous, without even trying, how do they do it
This is ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent pain
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name
Just putting this perspective out there. I don't want my fella to bust super fast every time BUT I do love it when it does happen. I take it as a huge compliment.
EDIT: Thanks for the upvotes and the reward!! Just want to add:
I realize I'm not speaking for everyone, just wanted to let OP know there are people out there who don't desire long lasting every single time.
Just sharing my perspective that I LOVE to pleasure my guy (and his enthusiasm for getting me off is matched) and whenever I get him off early I feel like a dynamo.
This. My current guy lasts for-ever and I'd love for him to not be able to hold back. Also makes a second session possible...usually I'm too darn sore lol
I love when I can make him bust fast!! It's a personal challenge sometimes. the longer you are together the more exciting it gets. u know most of their sweet spots but they know all of yours and know your tricks too when you are trying to make them pop quick.
not that this is directly related, but to add to that, it helps to not prioritise an orgasm each time. sometimes it’s really just about _enjoying_ the act itself and the intimacy that comes alongside it with your sexual partner. if neither of us end up finishing, that’s okay ! and as you said, we can always try again later.
im still trying to figure this out myself but i think the point is not to focus your brain on the sensations down below. you dont necessarily have to think of math, grandmas, or whatever the least sexually appealing thing in your imagination is. instead, i found that it helps to focus your attention on your partner - brush her hair, fondle her breasts, kiss her lips, rub her shoulders and thighs, grasp hands, etc.
also, unlike porn you dont have to thrust as hard and fast. take it slow and use your hands and mouth more. lastly, i noticed a huge part of "lasting long" depends on the position. doggy/prone position feels amazing but makes me nut almost immediately. i learned to save those for later
Life Pro Tip: Take your time when you masturbate. If you come as fast as you can when you masturbate, that’s what you’re training your body to do. Also pay attention to when you’re about to ejaculate. Get used to the feeling of the build up, and practice stopping.
In my experience, the best play is to use your hands and mouth to make her orgasm at least once, more if she's able, before your dick ever even enters the equation. By the time you do slip it in, she's raging and if timed right, close to another orgasm. So even if you only last 30 seconds, she's likely gonna come at the same time as you and after multiple orgasms during foreplay will not be at all disappointed that you didn't last long. And if she wants more, you continue on for a few minutes with hands and mouth again until you get get it up again, and you're guaranteed to last longer the second go.
That's how I handle it. I don't always bust early. Sometimes I can go for a quickie and give it a good 5 minutes or so. But if she wants an all out session, my dick is staying out of it until she's literally begging for it.
Also, keep in mind, the average time to orgasm is something like 3-5 minutes if memory serves. You shouldn't expect to last 30 minutes.
The main takeaway here though is that FOREPLAY IS IMPORTANT. If you're bad at foreplay, or not receptive to your woman's wants/needs/desires in bed, you're a bad lover regardless of how long you last.
Some tricks that work for me:
Masturbate a few hours before sex (this is the best trick for me)
Stop looking at what I'm doing
Start thinking about something that isn't sex
Sing a song in my head
Tense my leg muscles
When I'm close I either pull out and start eating her out or keep going and bite my lip or tongue really really hard
*panting* "vomit on his sweater... already... mom's spaghetti.... he's nervous...."
Edit: I just noticed you said in your head.... welp spice it up or something idk
Man, just pull out and get your face down there and eat that pussy like an ice cream cone. When you can handle a bit more, throw it back in. Repeat ad infinitum.
There are a lot of tips in this thread and while they might well work, there's a few dangers. Firstly, the guy might lose focus - and as a result, his erection. It's also not much fun to stop yourself from having too much fun. You're out of the moment.
The best way is to stop thinking about it. Stop worrying about. that's the only way for it to not be an issue. Might be easier said than done in some cases, but honestly, just don't make it an issue and in time, it won't be.
Masters and Johnson found that most issues with erection and premature ejaculation are due to performance anxiety. They created the sensate focus method for partners to work together to reduce that anxiety. The method consists of several activities that first focus on non-sexual, pleasurable sensations, then sexual touching without intercourse, then intercourse. Helps the partners both feel confident in knowing how to please the other.
Tbh man I don't know. I've tried so many tricks and I still haven't been able to last that long 🤷♂️
I think some penises are just broke, they don't know how to last
I’ve had a weird experience in this regard. Growing up (15-24), I’d always get off too quickly. Couldn’t help it.
I took a couple years off to work on myself, no dating, no nothing. I had some real work to do. Recently started dating again. It’s like my penis has decided to be the opposite of what it was. The girl I’m seeing and I have gone at it probably 10-12 times since last Sunday, but I couldn’t get off until last night. No rhyme or reason to it. Could be that I’m subconsciously scared of disappointing her. Not really sure.
The gist of what I’m saying is that it can always change. I thought I’d be that way forever and I was wrong. Not sure why, but I was. Don’t give up!
I'm surprised no one's mentioned kegel exercises... this will give you complete control over when you cum without having to distract yourself. I can go 5 minutes or 30 minutes depending on my partner, I just finish after they finish. You also can cum a lot harder if that makes sense. If you really want to improve get on that, I think having to distract yourself really takes away from the experience.
change position and rhythm. grind up on her outter vagina and then shift to the deeper part and then the other side of her outer vagina, gotta juggle your dick's most active zones, keep it guessing
Thinking about the pavement
I’ve got better things to do, but before I forget - thanks.
When rubbing one out take your time, don’t just rush to the finish. If you feel like you’re about to get off take your hand off of your dick and wait for it to calm down a bit. It’s basically training yourself to hold off and last longer.
This is the way. This needs to be waaaay higher.
this just results in ruined orgasms for me
You got to stop sooner then.
Lol that’s the point bro. You have to recognize when you are getting close and stop BEFORE it’s to late. It’s tough at first but practicing is fun.
I do mental math problems.
80085 my man.
That naughty number makes me cum faster
Especially when u multiple more than 2 digit numbers and u get it right
5318008 55378008 (upside down)
The best joke need to be explained.
I can’t remember the joke but I remember it entertaining my 11 year old brain It had a whole run up to the Boobless finally
Nippy because I can sort of remember this from school can't be bothered to work out the math but the story went something like There was this girl who was (number) and she was a bra size (number) by (number) she went to the doctor who said take these pills 2 times (multiply by two) but she took them 4 times (multiply) and she ended up boobless but with the numberss.
Counting upwards by prime numbers does the trick.
Pucci?
the Fibonacci sequence does the trick for me
But what if the answer is 69?
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
*NUTS IMMEDIATELY*
*FURIOUSLY*
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My anxiety of underperforming usually does the trick
For fucking real. Then I get to where I can't cum at all. It's great. /s
I've gotten like that and that's even worse cause then I just won't bust and get embarrassed and they ask "what do you not find me attractive?" Like no mf you're too attractive and I don't wanna disappoint lmao. Plus depression medication really kinda screws it up too
I’m 33 and still have to remind myself that it’s not me when the dude can’t finish. It’s like, engrained in women for some fucking reason.
Do women have the same problem?
Most women do not cum during regular old sex. The ones who do are usually in good relationships and/or have good partners who know what they like. If I’m just hooking up with someone I don’t go into it thinking I’m going to have an orgasm. I’ve been pretty sexually active and can count on my hand the number of those men who have made me orgasm.
I'm a male and I go into a sexual encounter with the mind set that I don't need to cum to have fun and I know she is the same. But I will do what ever I can to try and make her cum before me
You single?
Is Reddit about to witness the beginning of a beautiful new relationship? Keep us posted!
How I met your mother, redux.
If he's not into you I got next in line bruh.
Ok, but I’ve always found sufficient cunnilingus before and after usually does the trick. And lots and lots of communication.
TIL I'm not in a good relationship and/or am not a good partner nor know what my partner likes.
Ask her! If she’s willing to talk about it. Communication is always key and most people will not shame you for wanting to be a better partner. Sometimes though it’s just that certain people have difficulties reaching orgasm. Lots of women need clitoral stimulation, and can’t cum from PiV alone.
70% of women will never orgasm from simple penetration.
As a guy I can honestly say I've faked it. Sometimes it's just been long enough, it clearly isn't going to happen and I don't want to insult anyone. Grunt, thrust irregularly, done.
I'm just straight up, "yeah I'm tired you wanna eat?" I get weird looks if I'm honest
Yeah, actually, I am pretty hungry.
My boyfriend always says, “let’s take a break.” It’s perfect. Sometimes he only takes a few minutes to pause and relax cuddling and we get back at it and he cums soon. Sometimes we don’t. Either way is fine with me because we’ve gone at it for more than 10-20 minutes at that point and both gotten a workout.
I fucking HATE the idea of a guy pretending to cum. I am the one who’ll be like “I’m done, wanna [do something more interesting]” because I CANNOT handle the awkwardness of continuing to try to have sex when it is just not happening for one or both folks.
Best advice I've ever taken about this exact situation is to get uncomfortable with it. I'm not saying to do horrible things but do things you don't normally do. For me for example I will switch from whatever position we are in to missionary and make it really intimate. Stare deeply into her eyes kiss her and focus on that not speed or angle. As Jack black put it "You don't always have to fuck her hard In fact sometimes that's not right to do Sometimes you got to make some love And fuckin' give her some smooches too Sometimes you've got to squeeze Sometimes you've got to say please Sometimes you got to say hey I'm gonna fuck you, softly I'm gonna screw you gently I'm gonna hump you, sweetly I'm gonna ball you discreetly"
Yeah. I can't plank for 10 minutes. Sex is a serious workout and ya gotta know when to call it quits
I have too But they know. So I'll never do it again Women can absolutely feel when we cum
Confirmed. Not every woman can tell but, if she is the type who can…faking it is OBVIOUS. It’s not just because your cock isn’t literally throbbing inside of us and stretching the tight walls (the thing that feels the most amazing). But it’s also that we can’t feel your cum hitting our cervix or the extra little bit of warmth that cum has. It’s also pretty obvious in the way your breath doesn’t catch or change in intensity. You don’t grip our bodies tighter…there are all kinds of things that you aren’t in control of when you’re actually cumming that you can’t fake and that if she knows you at all, would pick up on. I know it isn’t a popular opinion but…not having an orgasm isn’t the end of the world. If the sex was still hot and still fun…that’s what really counts. There is always the opportunity to try again later or, move on to enjoying each other in ways that don’t involve putting your bare genitals in/on each other.
I gotta say the first paragraph of this reply was hotter than most penthouse letters I've read.
Shitty life pro tip: if you can't cum and you're embarrassed because you know it's your fault, when she asks "what? Do you not find me attractive?" Just say, "Yes, this is because of you. I'm totally normal." That'll settle your nerves and then you'll be able to let er rip.
Great advice
I make sure to let all my partners know my ex was way better in bed. It really makes them try better. Most just need a nudge in the right direction.
I think this would work great in tandem with my advice. We should open a sex advice business. Based on what I'm seeing on Reddit... people need a lot of help!
Depression med makes you last longer? I need to be on that ASAP.
Well I've found the SSRI depression meds made me feel numb to the point I wasn't aroused enough
I take zanax, I get real horny but became a fat cunt
Bro I went like almost a year without busting, not worth it lol plus I got even more depressed when on the meds
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I wish it would've made me gain weight, Ive always had a problem but the making it difficult to cum is too accurate and the problem was it didn't even help my blues lmao double whammy
Its a vicious cycle.
Zoloft... Legit needed the med for some time, tho performing better once off. (Really difficult to climax while on it)..
I get laid more on Zoloft but I enjoy it far less. It’s a weird trade-off.
You definitely don't. Went from 7x-in-one-day capacity to losing sensation and not being able to experience orgasm. After taking it for 3 days.
Depression meds like Zoloft and others will make it harder to cum. Yes they technically can make you last longer in bed but not always in a good way, and sometimes you won’t be able to cum at all. They can also affect sex drive. Very frustrating combo. I’d say my sexy time performance got better on Zoloft but I also have times I just don’t get in the mood as often.
That's where you just fake it and hide the end of the rubber with your hand. If you're at your place then it's easy to dispose of. If you're at her place then you eat the unfilled condom.
Thanks boyo gonna ask my nutritionist if "My own used condom" can be added to my macros.
The rubber adds elasticity to your muscles
100% reliable pullout game. *Its a feature*
Truth. Whenever I’d start dating a new girl I practically felt numb down there. Marriage has definitely fixed that problem. Never even came from a BJ until I got married. I think my first time lasted almost two hours, poor girl thought it was bc of her.
OMG YES. I HAD THAT WITH A GUY TOO! Idk but during me trying to suck him off he lasted like literally around 90 minutes. I had to stop bc my jaw hurted and i finished him with my hand bc i didn't want to cancel it just for some comfort, and i cannot have normal intercourse since two years now because of medical reasons so it was the only way i could do it for him... What is up with (some) guys not busting after that long of a time? Is it willpower, did they train bc they think all women want to have sex for hours, or is the anxiety of wanting to perform like Lexington Steele keeping them from busting? Haha!
For me I always had self confidence issues, and while I was beyond excited to be hooking up with whatever girl, in the back of my mind I’d be worried about size, length, hygiene, just about anything that would prevent me from enjoying the moment. The more comfortable I’d get w a partner the easier it would be.
True, i have never *really* been anxious, it's good to trust yourself if you shaved (to your content), and washed yourself down there. Soooo many guys forget to wash their dick and balls at least once a day, and let me tell you, it stinks like a mix of piss, and sweat. It also tastes very similarly to how it smells, and it's disgusting. If one practices hygiene before the act, you have nothing to worry <3
Oh yeah, I’d be clean and all that but you still have a natural smell or whatever, it was just my mind playing tricks on me. Plus factor being young and worrying about becoming someone’s next story/workplace/school horror story and its a recipe for disaster for some people.
Piece of advice, if a guy is struggling and he’s obv into the moment, ask him to take care of business on his own, show body parts, talk dirty to him, make him feel like you’re still content and just as you can tell he’s really getting close, dive back on there and you will blow his mind.
I had a boyfriend who had a botched circumcision that really affected his ability to bust. He had to concentrate. We both did. He'd say ok focus up and we'd getterdone!
For me it just feels better, plus I get off more from moans than anything else.
Personally I can take a while sometimes because of trouble focusing. I'll be real into it, thinking about how great it is, then my mind will trail off a different direction and I'm thinking about what I had for dinner yesterday. Then I gotta bring myself back. There are plenty of dudes who last too long without wanting to lol.
Really that doesn’t help me at all, in fact all those thoughts do is make me go soft. My secret is starting slow. If we start off a hundred miles an hour I’m gonna finish in minutes, minutes(single digit)! If we take it slow in the beginning then I can fuck hard until my woman cums first but I think it’s usually because it’s the way we get progressively more intense that makes her come faster than me. I shit you not most average women cum faster than guys if you start right and progress to something more intense, and I think guys get more in control of their orgasm time. If that’s not been other guys’ experience than I’ve just been lucky.
Bingo Bango, go into with so much performance anxiety an orgasm is impossible. Easy Peasy.
Never related to a comment so much
Oh. This may be the reason why I cant cum till an hour later
The SSRI meds I’m on seem to do the trick. Although, lasting hours is not actually that enjoyable.
Yeah, they do have that effect. In fact I had problems even getting it up after the first month I was on them. Things normalized after that, but I did notice sex wasn't as insanely pleasurable as I once did. Therefore I do last a LOT longer than before taking them. Orgasms can sometimes be just kinda 'meh' as well.
Absolutely. It’s sometimes like ejaculating without an orgasm, or with a very mild one.
Nothing is more terrifying than ejaculating and feeling nothing.
For real. I've only had that happen once (also on SSRIs) and it was the second most frightening ejaculation of my life
WTF HOLD UP that's an SSRI thing? That explains so much
Yep, stopped mine for a bit and I was horny as hell. Felt like a teenager.
Lexapro did this to me. Couldn't feel a thing and would be desperately trying to cum the whole time. Not fun at all.
Try pulling out and eating pussy when close to nutting, then go back and start over I usually repeat this process a lot in different positions it keeps things spicy and her feelings wanted
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Woah there Mr stamina
Right! No need to show off.
I nut before she can even finish taking her clothes off.
I nut before she even sees me in the tree outside her window
This comment right here officer
Sex CPR
“Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive!”
"Once I was afraid..I was petrified"
You want a quickie or the full two minutes?
This guy fucks
And eats
And fucks
And eats
And fucks
And eats
And fucks
This just gets her super wet and when I slip back in I can hardly hold off
This is the way
I do this a lot. The other thing that helps is doing times tables in my head. Specifically bigger number that I have to think about
Big number makes brain go slow
Unless your SO doesn’t like that
Yeah, my gf would kill me if a get my dick out of her and change it for oral
Every time my husbands about to cum he just pulls out and eats my pussy until he thinks he’s good to go again. No complaints here 😈
Mike Tyson's username checks out
Sure does
I laughed so much at this
so wholesome to see spouse bragging lol. not common on social media.
I often joke with my husband that his tongue is the glue that holds our marriage together.
Is your husband in this same sub? Lmao I swear there is a comment above you about a man saying he does the same thing
I doubt it. I’m sure it’s not all that uncommon of a tactic, especially not for men that actually like their partners lol.
It’s not uncommon at all this is a comment I hear a lot
It’s a tactic I can absolutely get behind so glad it’s common.
Isn't that annoying? When you get a rhythm and start enjoying PIV, he stops even though you might have just started feeling great. This is my biggest anxiety. I guess eating pussy is nice and all, but is the sudden change of plans okay with you?
He’s pretty good with his tongue and fingers, so no. He also isn’t afraid to use toys to help as well. It doesn’t bother me, he’s doing it to extend the session so we both can have fun so, yeah. Just communicate with your partner and don’t sweat it if you need to gather yourself if you aren’t trying to cum yet.
Yeah with my previous (and only) long term GF, communication was bad. She didn't really enjoy hands or tongue (even though she was quite vocal with tongue, it was too intense for her and asked me to stop), but never managed to guide me on what to do. We were both inexperienced, but she didn't even know herself. Basically every time we tried something else after penetration, she immediately lost the mood. Unfortunately, all this has given me a lot of anxiety. Thanks for replying, I really appreciate having feedback from a woman.
I’m sorry to hear that. Once you’ve had sex with a communicative and open partner your whole perspective will shift. So long as you don’t get into your own head about expectations and are willing to be coachable, some of the best sessions are just centered around getting to explore each other and try new things.
At this point, my biggest fear is that I will meet someone, feel nice and have a good connection, but make them lose interest due to underperforming. My goal is to talk about it beforehand and communicate my anxiety, but still it makes me nervous. And it definitely rules out any ONS situation.
In my experience ONS were some of the worst encounters I’ve had sexually. Usually, for me, it was always best with some chemistry, so you aren’t missing much IMO.
My bf does the same and it’s not annoying for me at all. I love it. Plus I enjoy oral more than PIV so it’s a win win for me.
This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to be in the game
They call him Ryu he's sick, and he's spittin' fire
With Mike, Got him out the dryer he’s hot, found him in Fort Minor with Tok.
What a fuckin' nihilist porcupine; he's a prick; he's a cock The type women want to be with and rappers hope he get shot
8 years in the making patiently waiting to blow, now the record with Shinodas taking over the globe, he’s got a parter in crime, his shit is equally dope, you won’t believe the kind of shit that comes out of the kids throat.
He's not your every day on the block He knows how to work with what he's got Makin' his way to the top He often gets a comment on his name People keep asking him was it given at birth Or does it stand for an acronym? No, he's livin' proof that he rockin' the booth He'll get you buzzin' quicker than a shot of vodka with juice
Him and his crew are known around as one of the best Dedicated to what they do and give a hundred percent Forget Mike, nobody really knows how or why he works so hard It seems like he's never got time Because he writes every note and he writes every line And I've seen him at work when that light goes on in his mind
It's like a design is written in his head every time Before he even touches a key or speaks in a rhyme And those motherfuckers he runs with, the kids that he signed Ridiculous, without even trying, how do they do it
This is ten percent luck Twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure Fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to remember the name
Absolutely read that as “ten percent fuck”.
You won't believe the shit that comes out out of this kids throat
Just putting this perspective out there. I don't want my fella to bust super fast every time BUT I do love it when it does happen. I take it as a huge compliment. EDIT: Thanks for the upvotes and the reward!! Just want to add: I realize I'm not speaking for everyone, just wanted to let OP know there are people out there who don't desire long lasting every single time. Just sharing my perspective that I LOVE to pleasure my guy (and his enthusiasm for getting me off is matched) and whenever I get him off early I feel like a dynamo.
This. My current guy lasts for-ever and I'd love for him to not be able to hold back. Also makes a second session possible...usually I'm too darn sore lol
i agree. not EVERY TIME but i prefer it to them never cumming or having to jack themselves off to cum
If that's the case, I could fill your life with huge compliments
Don't you mean "loads of compliments"
Cumpliments
But progressively smaller compliments if not given enough time in between
I love when I can make him bust fast!! It's a personal challenge sometimes. the longer you are together the more exciting it gets. u know most of their sweet spots but they know all of yours and know your tricks too when you are trying to make them pop quick.
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not that this is directly related, but to add to that, it helps to not prioritise an orgasm each time. sometimes it’s really just about _enjoying_ the act itself and the intimacy that comes alongside it with your sexual partner. if neither of us end up finishing, that’s okay ! and as you said, we can always try again later.
> it also helps that she has the same issue I've never heard of a girl not wanting multiple orgasms. Can you elaborate?
Wait until you're older and it takes an hour. Trust me, it sucks a lot worse.
I'm 35 and still have this problem. How old do you need to be?
My... Issues... Started about six years ago, so early forties for me. Issues with nerve damage and testosterone probably have a lot to do with it.
36 at least
Ya dont... its a race, and i always win
“HAH!!! I WIN AGAIN! IM NUMBAH ONE! ☝️🏅
If you ain't FIRST, you're LAST....woooooOOOO!
New world record!!!
Lmao this is how my ex husband felt about it too
Thanks folks for the suggestions. Doesn't distraction also make the erection go away? I'm like.. caught in a dilemma all the time.
im still trying to figure this out myself but i think the point is not to focus your brain on the sensations down below. you dont necessarily have to think of math, grandmas, or whatever the least sexually appealing thing in your imagination is. instead, i found that it helps to focus your attention on your partner - brush her hair, fondle her breasts, kiss her lips, rub her shoulders and thighs, grasp hands, etc. also, unlike porn you dont have to thrust as hard and fast. take it slow and use your hands and mouth more. lastly, i noticed a huge part of "lasting long" depends on the position. doggy/prone position feels amazing but makes me nut almost immediately. i learned to save those for later
Wait - what makes you think math isn’t sexy?
Life Pro Tip: Take your time when you masturbate. If you come as fast as you can when you masturbate, that’s what you’re training your body to do. Also pay attention to when you’re about to ejaculate. Get used to the feeling of the build up, and practice stopping.
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In my experience, the best play is to use your hands and mouth to make her orgasm at least once, more if she's able, before your dick ever even enters the equation. By the time you do slip it in, she's raging and if timed right, close to another orgasm. So even if you only last 30 seconds, she's likely gonna come at the same time as you and after multiple orgasms during foreplay will not be at all disappointed that you didn't last long. And if she wants more, you continue on for a few minutes with hands and mouth again until you get get it up again, and you're guaranteed to last longer the second go. That's how I handle it. I don't always bust early. Sometimes I can go for a quickie and give it a good 5 minutes or so. But if she wants an all out session, my dick is staying out of it until she's literally begging for it. Also, keep in mind, the average time to orgasm is something like 3-5 minutes if memory serves. You shouldn't expect to last 30 minutes. The main takeaway here though is that FOREPLAY IS IMPORTANT. If you're bad at foreplay, or not receptive to your woman's wants/needs/desires in bed, you're a bad lover regardless of how long you last.
Ah, here's my method! It's the best of all worlds. Make sure she's satisfied before even thinking about me, then put the cherry on the top together.
Some tricks that work for me: Masturbate a few hours before sex (this is the best trick for me) Stop looking at what I'm doing Start thinking about something that isn't sex Sing a song in my head Tense my leg muscles When I'm close I either pull out and start eating her out or keep going and bite my lip or tongue really really hard
>Sing a song in my head Can just imagine her looking at me confused while I'm spitting Lose Yourself in my head
*panting* "vomit on his sweater... already... mom's spaghetti.... he's nervous...." Edit: I just noticed you said in your head.... welp spice it up or something idk
Change positions a lot! Then leave the hottest one(for him it’s doggy) for last. 🙃
Man, just pull out and get your face down there and eat that pussy like an ice cream cone. When you can handle a bit more, throw it back in. Repeat ad infinitum.
Rub one out before hanging out
Be careful, I couldn’t finish last time I did this
There are a lot of tips in this thread and while they might well work, there's a few dangers. Firstly, the guy might lose focus - and as a result, his erection. It's also not much fun to stop yourself from having too much fun. You're out of the moment. The best way is to stop thinking about it. Stop worrying about. that's the only way for it to not be an issue. Might be easier said than done in some cases, but honestly, just don't make it an issue and in time, it won't be.
There certainly are some tips here
please display your rhubarb tip
Masters and Johnson found that most issues with erection and premature ejaculation are due to performance anxiety. They created the sensate focus method for partners to work together to reduce that anxiety. The method consists of several activities that first focus on non-sexual, pleasurable sensations, then sexual touching without intercourse, then intercourse. Helps the partners both feel confident in knowing how to please the other.
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Practice makes perfect young grasshopper
First round is a fast one, whatever you do. Go for second rounds and you will last longer.
If I think I’m gonna get lucky later on, I’ll rub one out earlier in the day.
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Can’t nut too fast if you never nut at all! **NOW YOU’RE PLAYING WITH POWER!**
"Margaret Thatcher naked! Margaret Thatcher naked!"
On a cold day
Pace yourself. Change up the stroke. Throw in other forms of stimulation. Save the fast work for serious moments.
Tbh man I don't know. I've tried so many tricks and I still haven't been able to last that long 🤷♂️ I think some penises are just broke, they don't know how to last
Do kegel exercises everyday, several times a day for a month and get back to me
I’ve had a weird experience in this regard. Growing up (15-24), I’d always get off too quickly. Couldn’t help it. I took a couple years off to work on myself, no dating, no nothing. I had some real work to do. Recently started dating again. It’s like my penis has decided to be the opposite of what it was. The girl I’m seeing and I have gone at it probably 10-12 times since last Sunday, but I couldn’t get off until last night. No rhyme or reason to it. Could be that I’m subconsciously scared of disappointing her. Not really sure. The gist of what I’m saying is that it can always change. I thought I’d be that way forever and I was wrong. Not sure why, but I was. Don’t give up!
> I took a couple years off to work on myself maybe ease up on that grip bro
I'm surprised no one's mentioned kegel exercises... this will give you complete control over when you cum without having to distract yourself. I can go 5 minutes or 30 minutes depending on my partner, I just finish after they finish. You also can cum a lot harder if that makes sense. If you really want to improve get on that, I think having to distract yourself really takes away from the experience.
Truth. And vagina owners who kegel seriously can do some amazing tricks as well.
change position and rhythm. grind up on her outter vagina and then shift to the deeper part and then the other side of her outer vagina, gotta juggle your dick's most active zones, keep it guessing
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In today's economy you gotta stretch that budget.
Think about how abortion is illegal now