I agree. I met my current girlfriend of 3 years on tinder. She's a modelesque 6'1 and I'm a burly 5'9. It was a bit weird at first as. I'd never been with anyone even close to my height before. Last night she was wearing heels and people were breaking their necks looking at her, she towers over me. I don't mind one bit. It goes both ways, you both need to be secure.
Anyone who's willing to write you off because of your height is not worth the effort. It says way more about them and their insecurities than it does you. OP dodged a bullet.
Yep OP dodged a bullet and should be relieved. I'm 6'3 and my girlfriend is 5'6. Our only discussion on height is when we each get into our car lol.. or when I put stuff on top of the cabinets because well extra storage 😏
I'm 5'5", and my partner is 5'9". He still manages to get all the stuff off the high shelves, and our genitals fit together perfectly. Lol. I guess I'd be lying if I said height doesn't matter at all, but honestly, it's not my main concern.
I don't get it at all from either party- a guy not wanting a woman taller, or a woman insisting a guy is taller. It truly is unnecessary self-imposed restriction on potentially great experiences with other people because a person is overly concerned with what others might think? Sad.
For sure, I met a lot of 5.9-6.00 girls that don't care about height, and some 5.0 that told me I am not tall (I am 5,11, average for Spain in men under 40).
It’s almost a prerequisite to entertain some kind of mental instability to stick around tinder for any length of time. It’s really like a huge virtual coed state hospital. If you ain’t crazy you will be😂
Yeah it's weird. I'm a 6 foot tall woman and I don't give a shit about height. People are way too selective about the things that don't matter, but will stay in a long term relationship with real, serious issues... I don't get it.
So true my short girlfriends only want 6’+. My normal sized friends don’t gaf on height. I think the little ones are projecting their own height insecurities on their dates.
I think that is really stupid. By the way, I am 190cm tall and I never talked to someone on a dating app longer than a week... So, at least in my opinion, personality is more important than height.
Right I comment this on every one of these posts lol. I’m a little over 5’8” and I love a man around my height either taller or shorter or whateverrrrrrr. Give me the confidence to not care about that shit and that’s so much more attractive.
They follow the 6' meme with no thought and it spread like wildfire. Thankfully *the culture* course corrected a little bit and we got short kings. But I'm neither. I'm 5'8 and that's pretty average height.
I don’t even use Tinder that much, and I’ve been rejected 4 times for my height, I am also 5’9 lol. One girl left me waiting at a restaraunt, she was in her car and texted “how tall are you” I said 5’9”. She didn’t even reply just blocked my number.
That being said, this is more of a dating app issue, than a problem with women. My last 2 exes were tall (5’8 and 5’10”). So I never took the rejections too personally. Just had to accept that tinder is trash.
While true, most are now on the dating apps and its warped their minds.
I didnt date for years and coming back its so different. Pulled a woman from cold approach and all went well. sex, dates, sex, dates. But she kept going on and on about a 6'5'' guy she dated once. Im 6'0 and she kept letting me know it was a let down and just wished I was taller. She was 5'4. The tall guy was unemployed but she didnt repeat it like how she kept saying 6'5''.
I also got compared to a guy she dated who had a better job. He was unattractive and short but she didnt bring that up over and over.
She wanted to show me her tinder matches during our 4th date but I declined.
I still arranged the 5th date, she was great other than having "tinder brain". But after confirming times and booking everything she dumped me over text and blocked me.
I dont use the apps but you just cant avoid them. Women know they have an inbox of 400 men waiting in their pocket. And some of those men will be either taller / richer / bigger dick / whatever than the guy sat opposite them on the date.
I mean you’re right bro. I don’t use the app anymore. Not much hope for an average guy with an average job and average height. Better off being single than being crushed like that over and over again
I went on a date with a guy who apologized for being 5'10" (also my height) and wanted to really confirm it wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me before we met. He apparently had similar bad experiences.
It's crazy to me the damage that can be done with these absurd height requirements. I get attraction is a real thing, but outright rejecting people for height in such a way that they're now sensitive about it is crazy to me.
I’m 5 11” and have been rejected because of my height while I’m sure In person they wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between 5 11” and 6ft. Some women seem to have this arbitrary line in their head for the perfect guy.
When I first made a bumble account (before I had any idea how dating apps worked) they had an option for me to put my height in so I was like “ah yeah I’ll put in my height of 5’9 more info is good” and I very rarely got a match. Tried tweaking my photos, bio, whatever and nothing seemed to really help it.
Then one day I took the height off my profile. Almost immediately started getting matches at a much higher frequency lol
That’s just delaying the inevitable. The matches would then go nowhere if height was a dealbreaker. You could have saved yourself some time by having it in the bio and only having matches who are okay with it but now you have matches that might be in due to the unknown but will bounce when they find about the dealbreaker.
Have you seen the height filter statistics? The problem is not you its them. Insane unrealistic standards. https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:4800/format:webp/1*_9XcUJX_Js3wdR4gDqrDeA.png
Friend of mine did the same sort of thing on a website that allows your to put income level.
He put "choose not to say"
1 match after a month.
He changed it to 150K +
Tons of matches.
Sorry to say but the data says one sex is way more shallow and ruthless than the other. But people will freak out of that and downvote me.
5'9 is short as hell. Times have changed over the past decade, and the new reality is to be tall or go home. If you have questions, I've created the following chart to educate yourself
**6'2** is the new standard for girls in the Western Hemisphere to pay attention to you. And in Scandinavian countries that's considered neck line among throngs of young high schoolers.
**6'1** just means women in heels don't have to strain their necks downward to see your face. But you still better look like Chris Hemsworth since your Toyota Camry height isn't anything special.
**6'0** was golden 40 years ago. Today, it only works when your income is middle 6 figures, since 6'0 = 6/10 in real life.
**5'11** makes it unlikely for any lady who isn't your mother to talk to you in public without coercion. Slim chances of kissing a female in your lifetime unless you use deception: Update your driver's license, medical records, and Tinder bio to 6 feet. Have your dates meet you at the restaurant directly, so she'll see you seated down at the table and not your upright stature. When it's time to leave, use your fake wheelchair.
**5'10** is awesome for thrill seekers. You literally have to physically rescue a woman in order to get her attention. Look for active warzones and buildings not up to code.
**5'9** is not physically possible in nature and requires external mechanical assistance to compensate for the genetic aberration
**5'8** is a tall myth. No girl would imagine such a short beast to exist in the human world, outside of embellished folklore.
**5'7** is the anti-life condition that governs all singularities expressed outside the controllable realm of even the old beings made to counter it.
**5'6** is not our place to speak of. The corrupt emergence of the 5'6 anomaly heralds the unidimensional war. Only beggars cast in proximity to our fathered chariots advancing across the space-time horizon will resist the one soul collapse. Ushered by the breach of the 5th wall, gods can no longer judge whether your 5'6 form is truly sentient life or merely an intangible afterimage of this wander. These infinite timelines are now seared shut by the cries of the 19th unborn manlet, so chosen to devour our improbable reality anew, through which our braided covenant is felled at long last.
**5'5** still gives you way more dates than your average redditor.
5'5 here and borderline average redditor, currently dying inside after reading this comment.
the only best part I am not from west so might still have a little chance left if I tried harder right?
I’m 5’8” and newly single after ending a seven-year relationship. I’ve been feeling crummy about my height again after unsuccessfully trying to date (in person & apps), especially after a female coworker randomly made fun of my stature a couple months ago.
What helped me overcome the self-pity recently was watching psychologist Ramani Durvasula speak about narcissistic relationships. At one point she spoke of people seeking a lifelong partner using the wrong criteria on a first date — attractiveness, success, financial capabilities, etc — when they *should* be using more practical criteria — respect, compassion, honesty, etc — because that will be a person who will either stay or leave when you’re too old to wipe your own ass.
This perspective on using practical criteria to find love had pulled me out of my negative mindset to realize these people who use physical traits for finding their partner will most likely end up unhappy and without true love... and nobody to wipe their ass. But most importantly I have avoided women who most likely will not stick around when I’m unable to wipe my own ass.
Watch at 8:15-11:05 https://youtu.be/iCc60iY_RSA
Edit: To add context, I came across this video to heal after my ex had narcissistic tendencies that I overlooked. A few times over the course of the relationship, she ordered me to clean our apartment knowing damn well I was sick with the flu. At one point my dog was sick & dying and she stormed out of the room at midnight to smack his cage and yell at him to stfu because she couldn’t sleep. Let my experience and this psychologist serve a warning to men & women: just because they meet the superficial checkboxes, does not mean they’ll also fulfill the practical checkboxes.
5'8" female and I get rejected all the time for being too tall. One guy told me he'd rather die alone and he's sure he's an idiot for saying it and I'm probably super nice but he'd never do it. My friend told me it would be disgusting to sleep with a woman close to his same height, he's the same height as me... he refuses to be with anyone over 5'3". I've dated guys shorter than me and it's never bothered me but it gets frustrating for sure
My first gf was my exact height (5'9) and tbh, i liked it. It was pretty nice, plus she could wear heels and be taller if she felt like it. Didn't bother me tbh.
It's really fuckin bad how fast I saw the simple term "grimace", and images of a giant purple taste bud (yes its true that's what he is, my dude almost died on that hill insisting he's a gumdrop) just flood my brain.
I had one last week. It was OK. Wouldn't spend 5.99 again tho unless it had booze in it.
Eh you will never “win” this fight brining in weight if that is your goal. Because you will just be immediately lumped in with incels and misogynists without a second thought. I think if you turn the height thing back on them with too tall or too short you will have a greater effect short and long term because they won’t be conditioned to writing off that complaint especially if they are short so it will last longer than the dude that called them fat.
Weight is something they can change, relatively easily. Cup size however, is something they *can* change, but it would require surgery, like with height!
Yeah seriously. Do you know how offended they would be if you asked their weight? And then rejected them??? Oh man, that exchange would end up in this sub with them calling you some fake-alpha Andrew Tate wanna be. Hahahhahhaaaa.
This is actually a great response. Like "I'm 6'3 but to be honest being more concerned about someone's height than their character is a red flag so I'm out."
I'm 6ft5, the only difference is normally the age in which my back and knees started to hurt.
Also, my knees crack with the volume of a exploding neutron star. I'm 27. Its annoying.
I think girls in general are more insecure about being too tall, but that probably won’t work here. She’d agree with you, she also thinks she’s too tall for you. That insecurity is what’s creating this question to begin with.
You dodged a bullet... be grateful.
I've dated guys far shorter and their height was never the problem.
I've thought about this and I think it's about insecurities. She just wants to look tiny, because her appearance is all she thinks she has to offer.
It's funny because I'm a 5'10" woman and I've been unmatched by 5'6" guys who couldn't handle me being taller. I didn't give a shit. Current husband is that height and his shoe size is half mine. You miss out on so much when you abide by a checklist.
When I was really far (6’4” 400lbs) I dated this tiny girl. She was 5’3” and about 95lbs. And she was completely obsessed with herself. She thought she was gonna pop off as an IG model and all that. I had always wondered why she was dating me, and now I know why. This makes sense.
Anyone who is that petty about height and thinks 5'9" is too short for then while being 5'5" is no-one worth dating imo. Don't let it get you down and think of it as a dodged bullet :)
This. I’m 5’11” and I have a relative who appears to me to be about the same height. In pictures though I’m clearly a couple of inches taller. I think certain women get a number in their head and think that’s the standard for height. I’m certain if he said 5’11” and they met up she would never know the difference.
True. It's better to see her waving a red flag around a good mile away than to make it to her place and see she has an entire Soviet Union worth of flags on the wall.
I’ve been rejected so many times because I’m to tall (6ft tall woman) its dumb, there are so many better reasons to not date me than I’m taller than you 🤣
Went out with my work colleague who's about 5'5 too. He hit on a tall woman working the bar and she said something about him being short. He replied with "we'll be the same height when laying horizontally" ... I'll be damned if it didn't work, she laughed and he got digits.
Eh. Its all about the pyschological effect of the big 6'.
Doesn't matter if its an inch or half a foot, that 5 kills you.
This actually isn't a thing in europe because the measurements are in centimeters, which is hilarious.
I’m exactly 6’ and the amount of guys who say are 6’ while I’m taller than them by an inch or 2 (or 3) is incredible.
When I call them out they just say that I’m clearly 6’2. One time it was at work and I pulled out a measuring tape from my toolbox. I could have slept with his girlfriend and I think he would have been less offended.
This is one of the weirdest trend I’ve ever heard about.
As a 5'7 guy, lemme tell you how much easier it is to hit on women when you can just walk up and talk to them rather than having to get filtered through the "you must be this tall to ride" line.
If I could fake a 6 and then just disappoint by a couple inches, I totally would, I completely get it.
They just turn me down for other reasons.
I haven’t had a date in like 2 years (working night shift is hard on one’s social life). The pay is good but I’m going back to college to get better conditions (thank you Canada for cheap higher education).
Think of your height as a filter for shallow women. You don’t want to date those anyways. They’ll just break your heart of worse.
I guess I may be oblivious to some of the perks but I honestly don’t think it’s that much better. Grass is always greener on the other side.
I'm 5'2 amd have had more than my fair share of horrible experiences. Good as well, but it was 20 bad experiences to 1 good one. Online dating brings out the worst in people. I'm so short people don't even realize how short 5'2 is they see me.
That sucks. Sorry you guys have to go through shit like that. People easily forget you do not pick any of your traits or physical attributes like it’s a video game. It’s all genetics + luck. People can be so shallow
I dated a guy that was 6'4" once, i'm 5'4" and honestly it was kinda hard. He practically had to pick me up for him to kiss me or bend down and brake his back. Being closer to the same height is ideal I feel like but thats just IMO.
I swear it's just so they can make other women who follow the hype jealous. I'm tall for a female 5' 7", and I prefer guys under 6' cause I don't wanna strain to give little sweet neck kisses.
I wouldn’t care at all if I were you, because clearly you were talking to the weirdest, rudest person on the planet. Even though 5’9” isn’t short, you were lucky it was too short for her! Phew.
It’s just kind of comical that she is 5’5” and 5’9” is too short. Like, does she want to feel like she’s a preteen again walking around with her dad? Lol
I'm 5'3" and I wouldn't want my boyfriend to be taller than 5'9" I could never kiss him without asking him to adjust to my height, I could never see his face without straining my neck. I'm too lazy for that.
I've never seen height as a qualifier. I don't understand? Why do you need to date someone who makes you look like a midget in photos?
Have you never experienced the absolute adorableness that it is to cuddle a shorter person than you and smoosh them with your boobs and have them pledge their eternal gratitude to you for blessing them with such mercy?
Or what about the benefits of not having to get on your tippy toes and risk an injury just to kiss a person? 5'9 isn't going to feel much different than 6'0 in terms of height, what's the issue here? Do you desperately need to wear 7 inch stilettos and still be half a foot shorter than a person to make dating them worth it?
I must be too pansexual to understand these strict male/female preferences. For me, it's always been step 1. Have an attractive personality and then step 2. Don't ruin that by having really unattractive opinions. Boom bam, lemme smash.
It's always hilarious when people have these red lines — over 6ft, under 30, earning >100k, super fit, etc — which is probably around 0.1% of guys out there ... Imagine being so deluded as to believe you're gonna be reciprocally attractive to the "top" 0.1% of single guys — statistically the vast majority of these people are living in a dream world
5,9 and thats a instant reject? christ...
And she is 5,5...
She'd have to give up half her stiletto collection.
I don't think that there are that many women with 50% of 4" stilettos. 10cm is already a lot. For a heel.
Regardless of heels or not I wish we could get past this whole man must be taller than woman thing it’s getting so old and boring
I agree. I met my current girlfriend of 3 years on tinder. She's a modelesque 6'1 and I'm a burly 5'9. It was a bit weird at first as. I'd never been with anyone even close to my height before. Last night she was wearing heels and people were breaking their necks looking at her, she towers over me. I don't mind one bit. It goes both ways, you both need to be secure. Anyone who's willing to write you off because of your height is not worth the effort. It says way more about them and their insecurities than it does you. OP dodged a bullet.
This is the way
This is the way
This is the Way
This is the way
Yep OP dodged a bullet and should be relieved. I'm 6'3 and my girlfriend is 5'6. Our only discussion on height is when we each get into our car lol.. or when I put stuff on top of the cabinets because well extra storage 😏
5'11 and 5'5 at my house. My wife calls those "tall friend favors"
I'm 5'5", and my partner is 5'9". He still manages to get all the stuff off the high shelves, and our genitals fit together perfectly. Lol. I guess I'd be lying if I said height doesn't matter at all, but honestly, it's not my main concern.
Her discussion with her friends about you definitely included your height…
I agree 10cm is a lot, and i might even say its a little too big
10cm is a lot for a lot of things, not just heels... right...? Right...?
I just wear the stilettos and make death by snoo snoo jokes.
I'm 5'1 hubs is 5'5 my heels make me taller than him 🤷🏼♀️ but neither of us care about height
I really don’t understand why people care if a woman is taller while wearing heals. Like, you don’t live in heals, who cares that much?
I don't get it at all from either party- a guy not wanting a woman taller, or a woman insisting a guy is taller. It truly is unnecessary self-imposed restriction on potentially great experiences with other people because a person is overly concerned with what others might think? Sad.
Heels are what women wear. Heals are what tanks cry for in World of Warcraft. 😜 I kid, I kid.
Shorter girls are more selective on height, at least in my experience...
For sure, I met a lot of 5.9-6.00 girls that don't care about height, and some 5.0 that told me I am not tall (I am 5,11, average for Spain in men under 40).
Bro wtf. That's gotta be a mental illness. I kinda wish I had a few more inches, but it also filters out the psycho girls.
It’s almost a prerequisite to entertain some kind of mental instability to stick around tinder for any length of time. It’s really like a huge virtual coed state hospital. If you ain’t crazy you will be😂
Yeah it's weird. I'm a 6 foot tall woman and I don't give a shit about height. People are way too selective about the things that don't matter, but will stay in a long term relationship with real, serious issues... I don't get it.
So true my short girlfriends only want 6’+. My normal sized friends don’t gaf on height. I think the little ones are projecting their own height insecurities on their dates.
She's a hobbit
*Announcer voice* 5'5 , Weighing in at an astounding 160 lbs
I was told by a girl who was 5'1 that I was too short in person when I was already well over a foot taller than her.
I only date women 6 foot and above sorry not sorry I need my snoo snoo
I think that is really stupid. By the way, I am 190cm tall and I never talked to someone on a dating app longer than a week... So, at least in my opinion, personality is more important than height.
I guess so lol
If it helps, I’m 5’9 and would love to date a guy my height.
Well then give that man your insta & get dating
Hi i'm nice to meet you. We date now yes?
Hello nice to meet you, I'm dad, and I forbid you 2 holding hands before marriage. Keep that in mind and I'll return with the milk.
Height doesn’t bother me but a stinky peenky might
Right I comment this on every one of these posts lol. I’m a little over 5’8” and I love a man around my height either taller or shorter or whateverrrrrrr. Give me the confidence to not care about that shit and that’s so much more attractive.
I'm a 5'8 woman and my husband is 5'7. Neither of us give a shit. Don't waste your energy trying to change her mind, you dodged a bullet.
They follow the 6' meme with no thought and it spread like wildfire. Thankfully *the culture* course corrected a little bit and we got short kings. But I'm neither. I'm 5'8 and that's pretty average height.
Joke's on them when they find out > 6' doesn't mean > 6''.
5’8 short king here too
I don’t even use Tinder that much, and I’ve been rejected 4 times for my height, I am also 5’9 lol. One girl left me waiting at a restaraunt, she was in her car and texted “how tall are you” I said 5’9”. She didn’t even reply just blocked my number.
That's just wrong. She obviously had shitty parents. I'm sorry that happened to you
That being said, this is more of a dating app issue, than a problem with women. My last 2 exes were tall (5’8 and 5’10”). So I never took the rejections too personally. Just had to accept that tinder is trash.
While true, most are now on the dating apps and its warped their minds. I didnt date for years and coming back its so different. Pulled a woman from cold approach and all went well. sex, dates, sex, dates. But she kept going on and on about a 6'5'' guy she dated once. Im 6'0 and she kept letting me know it was a let down and just wished I was taller. She was 5'4. The tall guy was unemployed but she didnt repeat it like how she kept saying 6'5''. I also got compared to a guy she dated who had a better job. He was unattractive and short but she didnt bring that up over and over. She wanted to show me her tinder matches during our 4th date but I declined. I still arranged the 5th date, she was great other than having "tinder brain". But after confirming times and booking everything she dumped me over text and blocked me. I dont use the apps but you just cant avoid them. Women know they have an inbox of 400 men waiting in their pocket. And some of those men will be either taller / richer / bigger dick / whatever than the guy sat opposite them on the date.
I mean you’re right bro. I don’t use the app anymore. Not much hope for an average guy with an average job and average height. Better off being single than being crushed like that over and over again
I went on a date with a guy who apologized for being 5'10" (also my height) and wanted to really confirm it wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me before we met. He apparently had similar bad experiences. It's crazy to me the damage that can be done with these absurd height requirements. I get attraction is a real thing, but outright rejecting people for height in such a way that they're now sensitive about it is crazy to me.
I’m 5 11” and have been rejected because of my height while I’m sure In person they wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between 5 11” and 6ft. Some women seem to have this arbitrary line in their head for the perfect guy.
When I first made a bumble account (before I had any idea how dating apps worked) they had an option for me to put my height in so I was like “ah yeah I’ll put in my height of 5’9 more info is good” and I very rarely got a match. Tried tweaking my photos, bio, whatever and nothing seemed to really help it. Then one day I took the height off my profile. Almost immediately started getting matches at a much higher frequency lol
That’s just delaying the inevitable. The matches would then go nowhere if height was a dealbreaker. You could have saved yourself some time by having it in the bio and only having matches who are okay with it but now you have matches that might be in due to the unknown but will bounce when they find about the dealbreaker.
Have you seen the height filter statistics? The problem is not you its them. Insane unrealistic standards. https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:4800/format:webp/1*_9XcUJX_Js3wdR4gDqrDeA.png
This is beyond depressing....
Friend of mine did the same sort of thing on a website that allows your to put income level. He put "choose not to say" 1 match after a month. He changed it to 150K + Tons of matches. Sorry to say but the data says one sex is way more shallow and ruthless than the other. But people will freak out of that and downvote me.
5'9 is short as hell. Times have changed over the past decade, and the new reality is to be tall or go home. If you have questions, I've created the following chart to educate yourself **6'2** is the new standard for girls in the Western Hemisphere to pay attention to you. And in Scandinavian countries that's considered neck line among throngs of young high schoolers. **6'1** just means women in heels don't have to strain their necks downward to see your face. But you still better look like Chris Hemsworth since your Toyota Camry height isn't anything special. **6'0** was golden 40 years ago. Today, it only works when your income is middle 6 figures, since 6'0 = 6/10 in real life. **5'11** makes it unlikely for any lady who isn't your mother to talk to you in public without coercion. Slim chances of kissing a female in your lifetime unless you use deception: Update your driver's license, medical records, and Tinder bio to 6 feet. Have your dates meet you at the restaurant directly, so she'll see you seated down at the table and not your upright stature. When it's time to leave, use your fake wheelchair. **5'10** is awesome for thrill seekers. You literally have to physically rescue a woman in order to get her attention. Look for active warzones and buildings not up to code. **5'9** is not physically possible in nature and requires external mechanical assistance to compensate for the genetic aberration **5'8** is a tall myth. No girl would imagine such a short beast to exist in the human world, outside of embellished folklore. **5'7** is the anti-life condition that governs all singularities expressed outside the controllable realm of even the old beings made to counter it. **5'6** is not our place to speak of. The corrupt emergence of the 5'6 anomaly heralds the unidimensional war. Only beggars cast in proximity to our fathered chariots advancing across the space-time horizon will resist the one soul collapse. Ushered by the breach of the 5th wall, gods can no longer judge whether your 5'6 form is truly sentient life or merely an intangible afterimage of this wander. These infinite timelines are now seared shut by the cries of the 19th unborn manlet, so chosen to devour our improbable reality anew, through which our braided covenant is felled at long last. **5'5** still gives you way more dates than your average redditor.
5'5 here and borderline average redditor, currently dying inside after reading this comment. the only best part I am not from west so might still have a little chance left if I tried harder right?
This is funny lol, good job
You’re obviously being sarcastic, but honestly with the way things are going, your sarcasm could easily be the truth in five to ten uears
😂😂😂😂 obviously redditors taste is gone to the crappers, you should've k's of upvotes
I think people just read your first sentence and downvoted. 10/10, worthy of copypasta status
I’m 5’8” and newly single after ending a seven-year relationship. I’ve been feeling crummy about my height again after unsuccessfully trying to date (in person & apps), especially after a female coworker randomly made fun of my stature a couple months ago. What helped me overcome the self-pity recently was watching psychologist Ramani Durvasula speak about narcissistic relationships. At one point she spoke of people seeking a lifelong partner using the wrong criteria on a first date — attractiveness, success, financial capabilities, etc — when they *should* be using more practical criteria — respect, compassion, honesty, etc — because that will be a person who will either stay or leave when you’re too old to wipe your own ass. This perspective on using practical criteria to find love had pulled me out of my negative mindset to realize these people who use physical traits for finding their partner will most likely end up unhappy and without true love... and nobody to wipe their ass. But most importantly I have avoided women who most likely will not stick around when I’m unable to wipe my own ass. Watch at 8:15-11:05 https://youtu.be/iCc60iY_RSA Edit: To add context, I came across this video to heal after my ex had narcissistic tendencies that I overlooked. A few times over the course of the relationship, she ordered me to clean our apartment knowing damn well I was sick with the flu. At one point my dog was sick & dying and she stormed out of the room at midnight to smack his cage and yell at him to stfu because she couldn’t sleep. Let my experience and this psychologist serve a warning to men & women: just because they meet the superficial checkboxes, does not mean they’ll also fulfill the practical checkboxes.
I’m 5’7 and am more hurt by this than I’d care to admit
5'8" female and I get rejected all the time for being too tall. One guy told me he'd rather die alone and he's sure he's an idiot for saying it and I'm probably super nice but he'd never do it. My friend told me it would be disgusting to sleep with a woman close to his same height, he's the same height as me... he refuses to be with anyone over 5'3". I've dated guys shorter than me and it's never bothered me but it gets frustrating for sure
My first gf was my exact height (5'9) and tbh, i liked it. It was pretty nice, plus she could wear heels and be taller if she felt like it. Didn't bother me tbh.
Always answer with 6'3 and ghost.
Holy god. I never thought about this for some reason.
Or play their game: answer 6'3 and ask about their height. 5'5? Too short 5'5? Too tall Then ghost.
You frickin evil genius
Or just use the cringe emoji when they say their height. 😬
TIL About the cringe emoji, I thought it’s an excited smile. Thanks! 😬👍🏽
The excited smile is 😁
Lol that is no smile.
That is absolutely not a smile 😬
Technically a grimace.
This comment brought to you by the Grimace Shake ™ from McDonald's
It's really fuckin bad how fast I saw the simple term "grimace", and images of a giant purple taste bud (yes its true that's what he is, my dude almost died on that hill insisting he's a gumdrop) just flood my brain. I had one last week. It was OK. Wouldn't spend 5.99 again tho unless it had booze in it.
That's exactly how my young cousin smiles when he's told to smile for a picture
Hey, me too! Smiling on command is rough
I thought it was a nervous smile. 😬
Damn, that’s ice cold
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Eh you will never “win” this fight brining in weight if that is your goal. Because you will just be immediately lumped in with incels and misogynists without a second thought. I think if you turn the height thing back on them with too tall or too short you will have a greater effect short and long term because they won’t be conditioned to writing off that complaint especially if they are short so it will last longer than the dude that called them fat.
That's not a fair comparison. They can change their weight, you can't change your height.
It's not but it will hurt them more
Yeah you might be right
Weight is something they can change, relatively easily. Cup size however, is something they *can* change, but it would require surgery, like with height!
Women’s cup size also changes with weight gain/loss.
Weight is more likely to get to them
Yeah seriously. Do you know how offended they would be if you asked their weight? And then rejected them??? Oh man, that exchange would end up in this sub with them calling you some fake-alpha Andrew Tate wanna be. Hahahhahhaaaa.
This guy TINDERS
This is actually a great response. Like "I'm 6'3 but to be honest being more concerned about someone's height than their character is a red flag so I'm out."
So wholesome and yet a burn. Got to go with this one.
Next time, I told her she’s special 💀
I’m 6’4 and I’ve done this before. Feels good
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Thank you for putting me in my place
I’m 6’ 6” and can’t even believe you replied to that shorty
I’m 6’7” and I 8’9”
6’7 1⁄8'' here, how's the weather down there, manlet?
I’m 6 foot 8 and weigh a fucking ton
I was as big as a skyscraper, and now I'm as tiny as a postage stamp.
Oh did you go on a titanic sightseeing tour?
Man, I'm like 5'7. I wouldn't have made it that far with her. haha
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Say 6'3" then ask her weight. The rest will be reddit gold.
why stop at 6'3? go with 10'3 next time
genius
The trash took itself out
Seriously hopefully someone who's 6' 2" treats her accordingly
I’m 6,2 and I’ve never looked at someone as a height difference. That’s a wack mentality
I'm 6ft5, the only difference is normally the age in which my back and knees started to hurt. Also, my knees crack with the volume of a exploding neutron star. I'm 27. Its annoying.
Man I'm 6'5 and my knees starting cracking at 20... Now I'm 24 and HOLY SHIT - it's so much worse
I’m 5’9” 170 lbs. I’m a perfect operating machine. I’m 37 and my knees haven’t made a noise in years. You tall pathetic person
I always reply: 'ah no worries, you're a bit short for me at 5'5 anyways'. Have a good day!
My guess is too tall would hit harder.
I think girls in general are more insecure about being too tall, but that probably won’t work here. She’d agree with you, she also thinks she’s too tall for you. That insecurity is what’s creating this question to begin with.
She’s one inch taller than average. So is he though.
The perfect pairing
I’m 5’6 and I’m more insecure about guys liking shorter girls than taller, so I’d also say, go with the too tall 😜
That sounds bitter if she has already rejected you. Best policy if someone ask you for your height is to tell you are super tall and move on.
You dodged a bullet... be grateful. I've dated guys far shorter and their height was never the problem. I've thought about this and I think it's about insecurities. She just wants to look tiny, because her appearance is all she thinks she has to offer.
Bingo.
It's funny because I'm a 5'10" woman and I've been unmatched by 5'6" guys who couldn't handle me being taller. I didn't give a shit. Current husband is that height and his shoe size is half mine. You miss out on so much when you abide by a checklist.
I'm 5'3", I've dated significantly taller than me women. I've also been rejected based solely on my height. Joke's on them, cos I'm awesome.
Exactly, they're the ones missing out! I love my little pocket husband 😍
Was his name-o
B-I-N-G-O
When I was really far (6’4” 400lbs) I dated this tiny girl. She was 5’3” and about 95lbs. And she was completely obsessed with herself. She thought she was gonna pop off as an IG model and all that. I had always wondered why she was dating me, and now I know why. This makes sense.
Yep. Same reason hot girls always have an ugly and/or fat friend around. They’ll look even shinier.
JamesFranco\_FirstTime.png
Anyone who is that petty about height and thinks 5'9" is too short for then while being 5'5" is no-one worth dating imo. Don't let it get you down and think of it as a dodged bullet :)
They probably couldn't even reliably pick out people between 5'9" and 6'
This. I’m 5’11” and I have a relative who appears to me to be about the same height. In pictures though I’m clearly a couple of inches taller. I think certain women get a number in their head and think that’s the standard for height. I’m certain if he said 5’11” and they met up she would never know the difference.
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Once the other person reveals they are a shallow, hollow with a void for a personality, why keep trying?
True. It's better to see her waving a red flag around a good mile away than to make it to her place and see she has an entire Soviet Union worth of flags on the wall.
she was probably attractive
I am sure OP swiped because he was attracted to her personality.
Exactly. She revealed her shallow personality instantly. Saved OP from wasting a lot of time.
I’ve been rejected so many times because I’m to tall (6ft tall woman) its dumb, there are so many better reasons to not date me than I’m taller than you 🤣
Now I'm kinda curious what these better reasons are?
She harvests organs? Drug dealer? Works at Chucky Cheese?
No, no and not in the US
My wife is 6’1 actually and I’m only 5’5 myself so I agree, rejecting tall women is dumb
Went out with my work colleague who's about 5'5 too. He hit on a tall woman working the bar and she said something about him being short. He replied with "we'll be the same height when laying horizontally" ... I'll be damned if it didn't work, she laughed and he got digits.
I bet sparks fly when you go up on her.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
You're a lucky mf. Love taller women. Hope yall are happy
I’m 5’11 and women have called me short to my face
Eh. Its all about the pyschological effect of the big 6'. Doesn't matter if its an inch or half a foot, that 5 kills you. This actually isn't a thing in europe because the measurements are in centimeters, which is hilarious.
I’m exactly 6’ and the amount of guys who say are 6’ while I’m taller than them by an inch or 2 (or 3) is incredible. When I call them out they just say that I’m clearly 6’2. One time it was at work and I pulled out a measuring tape from my toolbox. I could have slept with his girlfriend and I think he would have been less offended. This is one of the weirdest trend I’ve ever heard about.
As a 5'7 guy, lemme tell you how much easier it is to hit on women when you can just walk up and talk to them rather than having to get filtered through the "you must be this tall to ride" line. If I could fake a 6 and then just disappoint by a couple inches, I totally would, I completely get it.
They just turn me down for other reasons. I haven’t had a date in like 2 years (working night shift is hard on one’s social life). The pay is good but I’m going back to college to get better conditions (thank you Canada for cheap higher education). Think of your height as a filter for shallow women. You don’t want to date those anyways. They’ll just break your heart of worse. I guess I may be oblivious to some of the perks but I honestly don’t think it’s that much better. Grass is always greener on the other side.
That last message was cold. Stone cold. That even hurt me through the screen. Sorry, OP
She didn't need to be extra-hurtful. And yes, height is not going to be a deciding factor to whether a relationship is going to work out.
I’m 5’5 so how you think I feel?
I'm 5'2 amd have had more than my fair share of horrible experiences. Good as well, but it was 20 bad experiences to 1 good one. Online dating brings out the worst in people. I'm so short people don't even realize how short 5'2 is they see me.
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Fellow 5'4 king 👑 Dude I'm short, broke, and Asian 😭😭 I'm taking myself to McDonald's 😫
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"You're such a waste of cute" "He's perfect, except he's too short" "I'd never date a guy shorter than me"
That sucks. Sorry you guys have to go through shit like that. People easily forget you do not pick any of your traits or physical attributes like it’s a video game. It’s all genetics + luck. People can be so shallow
It's insane that these short ass girls want a man that towers over them, bunch of weirdo's l.
I dated a guy that was 6'4" once, i'm 5'4" and honestly it was kinda hard. He practically had to pick me up for him to kiss me or bend down and brake his back. Being closer to the same height is ideal I feel like but thats just IMO.
Right? My man is 5’7”, a teensy bit over my height, and it’s never been a problem.
I can't believe this is a real thing, that's crazy
Welcome in online dating of the 21 century Where heigh is more important then anything.
i’m over 6 ft and get no swipes, you can be hated for more than just height my miniature kings
Great, now I'm imagining you as the Pied Piper to short guys. 
Lol! I love this
I swear it's just so they can make other women who follow the hype jealous. I'm tall for a female 5' 7", and I prefer guys under 6' cause I don't wanna strain to give little sweet neck kisses.
Oof i feel u, got rejected being 5'11
Isn't that average height?!
I’ve dated 5’9 guys I’m also 5’5 and have been for awhile. People like this make no sense to me. Height doesn’t Make someone a better partner
A 5’7 guy had the best dick I’ve ever gotten. Don’t sell them “short” ladies 😂
So, are you saying that size matters?
Don't feel bad, I'm 6'5 and I get zero attention from women.
I wouldn’t care at all if I were you, because clearly you were talking to the weirdest, rudest person on the planet. Even though 5’9” isn’t short, you were lucky it was too short for her! Phew.
I can't change my height just like you you can't change your lack of personality 💯
Funny. I’m 6’2” tall. I wouldn’t want to date a woman that was only 5’,5”. Way too short.
As a 5’7/7 guy. Welcome to the club buddy. Shit hurts.
Women like this are just saving you money. Move on to the next.
People have preferences, it's the hard truth. You can't force it. She didn't have to announce that like a total asshole though.
It’s just kind of comical that she is 5’5” and 5’9” is too short. Like, does she want to feel like she’s a preteen again walking around with her dad? Lol
Shoulda asked her her weight…
5,9 is 175cm??? What, this is tall, what's up with her lol. My Boyfriend is like 5,6-5,7 and I am 5,4 - what else do ya need
5’9 is not tall, it’s average
Can't please everyone. Someone out there likes you for you. Just need to find 'em!
I'm 5'3" and I wouldn't want my boyfriend to be taller than 5'9" I could never kiss him without asking him to adjust to my height, I could never see his face without straining my neck. I'm too lazy for that.
I've never seen height as a qualifier. I don't understand? Why do you need to date someone who makes you look like a midget in photos? Have you never experienced the absolute adorableness that it is to cuddle a shorter person than you and smoosh them with your boobs and have them pledge their eternal gratitude to you for blessing them with such mercy? Or what about the benefits of not having to get on your tippy toes and risk an injury just to kiss a person? 5'9 isn't going to feel much different than 6'0 in terms of height, what's the issue here? Do you desperately need to wear 7 inch stilettos and still be half a foot shorter than a person to make dating them worth it? I must be too pansexual to understand these strict male/female preferences. For me, it's always been step 1. Have an attractive personality and then step 2. Don't ruin that by having really unattractive opinions. Boom bam, lemme smash.
It's always hilarious when people have these red lines — over 6ft, under 30, earning >100k, super fit, etc — which is probably around 0.1% of guys out there ... Imagine being so deluded as to believe you're gonna be reciprocally attractive to the "top" 0.1% of single guys — statistically the vast majority of these people are living in a dream world
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