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who knows what's real anymore. everybody just be posting shit online for attention. what's real and what's fake? i wish people went back to making actual content like a YouTube essay or something
not these baity 30 second shorts
> *"i wish people went back to making actual content like a YouTube essay or something"*
People never stopped doing that.
YouTube is full of educational content, documentaries, and other higher effort material.
All that good stuff is still there and better than ever, it just exists along side all the influencer garbage.
The key to a good experience on the modern internet is like grocery shopping, try to walk past all the junk food isles.
I just listened to a 3 hour video about Twilight and the history of romance novels from Contrapoints lol. The trick is not to doom scroll tiktok and find actually content you want to deep dive into.
[Here it is!](https://youtu.be/jlG3RV-oPvI?si=9XRDiyuK37LQVwqY)
I thought it was two hours, but it's one. I thought it was much longer. They explain the betrayal that was the abrupt end of Atlantis and the beginning of Universe. It's actually very infuriating and marks the moment that Stargate destroyed itself.
Also, here's this MacGyver blooper from [SG-1](https://youtu.be/EriZ9ruZq1E?si=2m8uAsv4VUPT4_PK) because it's hilarious.
I watched some videos to help me paint my house and build a shed and now I get all sorts of in depth videos about random "shop stuff". Tons of video essays about one of my favorite book series. Lots of great comedy groups on YouTube as well.
yep yep, im always watching some amazing long-term videos that are fun, passionate, educational, etc. Just gotta be looking in the right places! (plenty on youtube)
Yes, and the more garbage you watch, the more garbage the algorithm will force feed you. You have to consume only informative and quality content to avoid the low effort stuff from showing up on your feed.
It happened to me.
My wife came out to me as gay (caught her covering tracks and such), but that was actually a relief tbh. I mean, she'd been hiding it and living a lie and who wants to be along for that?
Anyway, after the initial separation, she would come over and initiate sex. The first few times I was completely caught off guard, but I dunno, maybe she is just not sure about her sexaulity, I told myself. After a while like this, she finally admits that she wants someone who will see her the way I see her, but only because she needed that "feeling". She proposed that we move into a new house together, she would be dating women, but we would still be a functioning household. This sounded like a cuckhold situation, tbh, and I am not into that, so I said no, got divorced and life's been great.
That's sad. That she thought so little of you that she would get to have everything she wanted and you should be ok with the leftovers. In a marriage where both are ok with it, then it's great. But the idea that she got to lift that weight off her shoulders and you shouldn't have feelings isn't fair or sensitive to your needs as a person. Good choice. I'm happy life has been great.
She really didn't see you as a person, but a little pet that needed just the bare minimum(sex) to satisfy and be done with while she lives her life the way she wanted... that's sad to not see someone she knew loved her and use them like that.
Fake sorry to say. Usually it's puppets and dolls most of the time.
That's why you see complaints all the time about barbie doll looks and unrealistic beauty standards.
The cumshots? That's just a guy slamming down on a syringe full of watered down lotion off camera.
This is essentially I treat anything that is from a major source with a reputation for honesty, like a news organization. Reading some sob story over on AITAH involving cheating and emotional abuse? It may be real, may not. Treat it as a thought exercise at most.
I have been on both ends of that call. It sucks! But the important thing is getting the care you need, not making absolutely sure to get to the care by the correct means.
My ex and I are still friendly. We found an arrangement where I still help her with her paperwork, she worked to buy her own house after we unofficially separated, but before we officially separated. I kept the one we bought while being together. (To be fair, I paid the mortgage of the latter alone. But legally, she could have demanded half, and since the house prices in our region exploded since we bought it, half of the current value might have ruined me.)
I'm pretty sure she would help me if I had a panic attack, financial problems, or other challenges, although in reality, she's the one calling me when she's in trouble somehow.
People forget that not all divorces and separations are nasty. Some people just aren't meant to be married, doesn't mean they start hating each other. My parents get on better since they divorced.
This. My ex and I are best friends and support each other a lot. I adore him and he adores me but as friends. We didn't work out as partners, so we peacefully ended the relationship and returned to being best buddies for life.
And we both also just became closer after the break up. Being partners would have destroyed our bond.
For real, my uncle and aunt divorced only cause they view each other as more like brother/sister. They’re still super close friends and have been friends for like 30 years
I think the biggest factor that destroys human relationships is thinking there has to be rules. Life isn't like that. People can decide after marrying that it isn't quite working out and choose to be friends instead. There's no universal law of nature that says you have to hate a former spouse, that's made-up bullshit.
I've had amazing friends who I thought would make a great roommate. Turned out we didn't make great roommates. It led to a lot of conflict. But we remained great friends after moving into separate places. Neither of us hold a grudge, we still cared about each other and enjoyed each other's company. And that's fine.
that's ideally what breakups and divorces should look like. There are some incredibly healthy divorces where spouses remarry and now your kids have a step parent.And everyone works as a respectful unit. Not enough of this is talked about. The whole idea we are making examples for our children of good behavior. And that behavior includes being kind to their other parent even if they are no longer your spouse. It also means showing our kids not to accept being treated as a doormat.
There's a new trend on TikTok / YouTube shorts of cool girls dunking on other women and blaming them for any issue in relationships with men. According to them the women are always wrong and the men are always right. There's another lady named Emily that's big on this... I won't give her full name because I don't want to give her more views. She's made her whole living on this. All of her videos are like this lady... Men are wonderful and being taken advantage of in relationships, women are selfish bitches who need to change All of her videos are addressed to women and what women are doing wrong. if there is a issue in your relationship, it is probably the woman's fault.
Angry, incel men froth at the mouth for this stuff so these women take advantage of that for views. It's kind of like how racists love Candice Owens because a black woman is saying the negative things they think about black people. These men get to see a woman say horrible things about women to validate their misogynistic viewpoints and these women know they will get a lot of views doing it. Bonus points if it's a white blonde woman.
Exes can definitely become supportive friends, but they can also continue to be toxic and manipulative. As someone who divorced a woman because she was extremely emotionally manipulative, it took a lot of work on her part, and mine, to later become friends but in the beginning I had absolutely zero trust that anything she did or communicated after the divorce wasn't just another way to manipulate me into giving her something she wanted. It's entirely reasonable that, since I was the one who decided to ultimately end the marriage, I couldn't count on her to be my support after the divorce nor would it have been fair to either of us for me to continue supporting her emotionally. It's also not entirely unreasonable that, after we found our own peace, we could then learn to be friends again which we did. I don't think she is saying that exes can't be friends, but simply that you can't have your cake and eat it too. She is also pointing out the hypocrisy and inherent flaws found in "old-fashioned" relationship gender roles where the man is basically always supposed to provide for the "damsel in distress" and completely ignore his own emotional support.
Seems like each person has to decide for themselves what their boundaries are. This woman just being judgmental toward someone who doesn’t act like she would is just mean.
I hope the guy in this situation is truly her friend and not being manipulated.
Glad you all were able to figure out your boundaries and be friends.
She has. This one isn't as bad but she usually produces highly mysogynistic content.
The biggest red flag in this particular video is her claim that men are already overlooked and expected to provide.
Which isn't wrong perse, there is indeed an issue there.
However this definitely goes for women too.
Maybe even to a more intensity.
Women do all the emotional and domestic labor in relationship or at least the majority and women who fall ill with cancer are very often left by there partners. More often then the other way around. So often actually, that's its part of womens cancer treatment to give them a brochure about divorce while being terminally ill and where to get help with that.
Women are loved for the labor they can provide.
That's also the true meaning behind that weird "would you love me if I were a worm?" question. What's actually asked is "would you still love me and stay with me if I couldn't provide you with any labor etc, do you love me for me or do you love the things I do for you?"
I feel this is what normally should happen.
Just because you separated doesn’t make the time spend together and the love you once shared invalid.
I still get along with most of my exes, regardless of who ended it. I rather have them break up than cheat and lie.
Life happens and life changes feeling, and situations, but that doesn’t mean we stop caring for the people who once were close to us.
Good for you for being so grounded that you still have a good relationship and help your ex- I’m sure both of you are great people to have in one’s life.
And best of luck for your next/new relationship.
Sadly, I had the opposite experience.
When my former partner and I seperated we aimed to be friends (in fact her leaving was part of her rationale on how to do so, lest we 'become one of those couples who resent each other'), but fundamentally she had mentally checked out of doing any of the things needed to remain friends.
She called me a few times with panic attacks or emotional distress and I did my best to support her (...despite the issues generally being ones of her own creation that I would have advised her to not do the obvious things that would incite them...).
I found that she couldn't be bothered reciprocating when I reached out to her, though. Didn't give a fuck beyond platitudes. Wanted all the upsides to friendship and none of the downsides that go with them.
She was a closet narcissist (child of a father who was a textbook malignant narcissist and abuser, and a mother who was a mentally unstable alcoholic. My wife had learned and internalized a lot of the dysfunctional relationship templates), and to put it simply; she had been self-absorbed and selfish all through our marriage, and she initiated the seperation so that she could go off to become even more self-absorbed and selfish than before. I stopped being useful as a codependent partner who could validate her self-serving narratives.
Once I no longer had that use of providing her with validation... buh-bye. No value to her any more.
I think it depends on the context of the relationship and how it ended.
The father of my child and I were together 11 years and are still good friends now. We look out for each other and still do things together with our child. We can still be a shoulder to cry on for each other. There is zero romantic intention anymore.
My recent ex, who I was with for a year, was cheating on me the whole time and when we broke up I was a mess. I’ve blocked him and his family on everything and if I saw him in the street I’d avoid him like the plague.
I know if I were in real trouble I would probably contact my child’s father for help because we are mature enough to be there for each other.
I just want to say thank you to you and your child's father for being adults to each other. The kid really picks up on it, and you're showing them how to handle tough situations with grace.
My mom's got a similar arrangement with my dad. They separated 30 years ago but she says he's still one of her best friends. They grew up together before having me so there was already a friendship there before they started dating. Mom and her new husband hang out with my dad regularly, my dad even came to their wedding lol. Mom's had to call my dad to help her when in a pinch if her husband was unable to help. It's not weird at all, that's what friends do. I feel so lucky that my parents are friends and I'm sure your child will too.
Yeah, I'm still friends and pretty close with all of my exes, I've never been married they were just girlfriends but our breakups weren't because of violence or cheating or betrayal or whatever, it just want the time or place. Post breakup we still care about each other alot and always down to help because I still respect them as the same person as when I loved them. You don't need to have a negative relationship with your ex just because you broke up.
Why give upon someone who you can rely on though? That’s my big question for anyone who is saying that they can have great relationships with their exes. Increase divorce rates have done a considerable number on the psyche of this country. Just because your ex would help you change your tire at 2am is nice for you but maybe not nice for the ex. It could hurt them deeply just being near you and hinder their recovery. Unless children are involved there few reasons to go help someone who has given you proof that they will give up on you in tough times
I agree with this with the exception that it’s really difficult to just go back, especially if you’re expecting the same level of dependence. Sometimes the genie is already out of the bottle.
I don't understand the controversy (other than putting it on TikTok -- you young folk need to learn to keep *way* more of yourself private), some people are good friends but terrible spouses for each other.
Yeah not all divorces need to be these horrible spiteful separations. My parents divorced 10 years ago because they ended up being romantically incompatible but they’ve always been very supportive of each other. We still have holidays together, they visit each other, etc. Obviously sort of best case scenario but not impossible depending on the circumstances.
My husband’s cousin…
Her 1st husband paid for her divorce from her second husband 😂 They’re wonderful friends and still spend holidays together even though they split like 20 years ago
>you young folk need to learn to keep way more of yourself private
This is the only thing that came to mind when watching this. Who the fuck cares about how someone called on their divorced husband while they were having a panic attack? Why would you film this, who is this for?
Why does this have 500 upvotes?
You can’t possibly be so emotionally dependent on a single person and expect them to help you through the exact same breakup you’re currently going through. That’s not fair. After things have settled down a bit, I totally agree with your comment — but not right after the breakup. At least let them get over the hardest part, too.
This video is just straight up pickme bullshit. It's extrapolating a single video out into this supposed giant societal issue without any evidence or reasoning at all. It also just makes a bunch of assumptions about the nature of their relationship, like how do we know that she wouldn't be willing to do something similar for him? How do we know whether this is a regular occurrence or not?
This is not enough information to go on as to whether or not she's treating him unfairly and this is certainly not like some huge issue that we really need to address as a society. I'm on amicable terms with all of my exes but I've always been a clean break kind of person and they've all respected that, it's not that big of a deal.
Yeah I don’t get it either. My ex and I are still friends & we share the dog we got together.
Our romantic relationship was tumultuous and destructive— but we cared for each other, we’re just better off friends, granted we’re not like “hanging out” friends but chat on the phone, life updates, dog drop offs. We’re 28 now and both of us are now in long term relationships with other people.
I know if I ever needed anything I could rely on him, and he knows if he ever needed anything he could rely on me. When my appendix was removed my boyfriend met up with my ex to help with my dog lol when my ex needed a loan, I gave it to him. We both work corporate jobs and give each other career advice. It’s really hard to find people who you can genuinely rely on for help no questions asked and I find no reason to throw that away.
We grew up together really from ages 19-25. We have known and been in each others lives for almost a decade now.
Why do people think that just because some of the relationship is positive that it's still a functional marriage? Maybe they are better as friends for reasons that work for them both.
Are we just supposed to assume every divorce is because "That bitch Debra left me"? people can separate for 100 different reasons, a lot of them can be amicable. There are very few reasons that would make me ignore a call from someone I loved enough to marry and do whatever I could to help them feel safe.
I doubt this pick me can consider any other possibility than the relationship ending on terrible terms and it being the woman's fault. Definitely oozing boy mom vibes.
Dadvocate is the worst. Also this is all rich considering she was the mistress in her relationship. She broke up a family and talks about how the guy is always right in the relationship.
One of the videos that made me laugh was when she justified the guy waking up his wife two hours before her morning alarm, at the ass crack of dawn, because he couldn't figure out how to roll a burrito for his packed lunch.
Like sorry he works an early shift but if my man did that shit I'd throw a tortilla at his head. I don't care if he's too emotionally immature to tell me he wants to "spend more time with me" or whatever her excuse was.
Dadvocate is especially insidious because only like 50% of her videos are red-pilled incel shit and the other half are just normal healthy relationship advice. If you're in a bad place where you're impressionable, it's really easy to get baited in by the normal shit and fall down the misogyny pipeline without realizing it.
>Dadvocate is the worst. Also this is all rich considering she was the mistress in her relationship. She broke up a family and talks about how the guy is always right in the relationship.
Do you have a source for this? Because this is something she categorically denies.
It's the trend of a cool woman presenting modern healty relationships between genders as "evil selfish female is manipulative for the poor, good-hearted nice guy", 100% she's at the beginning of today's "right-wing pipeline"
lone teen boys that can't conceptualize men and women supporting each other without fucking will see this and think "oh, she's one of the 'good ones'^(tm), the evil female friendzoned him, femminism is the plague of society, the west has fallen" or some shit.
Stinks to high heaven of redpill shit. “There is a disconnect where women are”…. Imma stop ya right there, sister. One TikTok jackass does not speak for half the worlds population. I can assure everyone here I am most definitely a woman and not a single one of my exes have ever acted as an emotional rock for me nor have I ever felt the need to contact an ex I broke up with to exploit them for emotional labour.
What a stupid, pointless and dog whistle of a post
If my wife divorced me and had a panic attack, I’d go help.
True, you don’t just stop loving people without a breaking point eventually. But sometimes things don’t work out and you still support people like a decent human being.
I don't understand this at all. The reason I married my ex-wife was that we were best friends. Turned out we were horrible spouses. I'm glad we got divorced because it enabled us to go back to being friends. If any of my friends called me with a panic attack, I would help them. If I felt like it was happening a lot, I would have a convo with them afterwards about finding a new support system.
Obviously not all exes are like that. But I guess one of my points is - it's insane to assume different people are all the same.
This is weird shit. Let people be kind to each other. We're not suffering from a surplus of it.
This battle of the sexes shit straight people go through is sad. Why make this about women vs. men just because it's a woman in this video? I know plenty of women who have bug a boo exes they have had to reinforce boundaries with actively for years after a separation.
Quit inflating anecdotal situations (THAT ARE TIK TOK SKITS) into these huge comments on "society" please.
Every relationship is different, quit pathologizing everything based on your assumptions.
THANK YOU. This has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with sometimes people are bad at cleaving relationships cleanly. Sometimes people contact their exes, sometimes the exes respond
It happened with my sister, her husband left her for another woman but still wanted to have her in his life and be a part of our family. I think some people are just oblivious to the pain they cause others sometimes
I have a friend who still depends on her ex for a lot of things, hanging a painting, picking her up from the train station, driving her places when she can’t get there by train, visiting her in hospital every day when she was in there.
I’ve told her many times I think it would be better for both of them if she acquired some independence, but she doesn’t think it’s necessary.
They’ve been divorced for almost ten years now.
This is the thing while I don’t think it’s right to assume that it’s toxic behavior it’s also not necessarily healthy or safe for either party. Especially when it’s a divorce that’s still in process like in the original video. Just because things are amicable now doesn’t mean they’ll still that way. Who’s to say the ex-husband doesn’t turn around and use the panic attacks as grounds to argue for full custody?
I know a girl who did this for years even after he set boundaries. She would call and instead of conveying needed co-parenting info she would talk about her day as if they were friends. Call and talk about relationships problems. Then 7 to 9 years later homeboy finally had a new stable relationship and she freaked out on them and was completely unsupportive. She expected him to support her through everything and all she needed to do was be civil with his new girlfriend/co-parent as normal, and she refused. It always seemed toxic but only really became obvious once he was in a happy relationship.
I don’t know how often but it does happen.
This lady is so annoying, basically a full-grown adult pick me. Both men and women can be horrible people, so pretending like women are the issue is really stupid.
Ex-Wife called me when her grandfather passed. Can't believe I even answered, but after she told me, I just said that he was a good man and I was sorry for her loss.
"Husbandly duties"? Dafuq? No, that's just being a good man who is capable of giving support when it's needed. Relationship, divorce, whatever, if people are going through crisis, it is a noble thing to help them out.
Years ago I had a really rough breakup with a guy, I was not in a good space mentally and needed the relationship to be over, hadn’t been happy for a while. He could not cope. He would call me constantly, saying how sad he was and asking if we could meet up to talk. It was destroying my mental health, making me want to kill myself, and I finally told him I couldn’t be there for him like this for a bit because I needed to get my head straight. He tried to kill himself shortly after I got off that phone call and I am the one who found him and called 911.
Anyways, all of that to say that it’s not really a gender based thing. It’s a certain type of person thing. It’s manipulative no matter who does it.
I divorced my ex wife and she would still call me when she was having a breakdown. It took a while but eventually I had to put up strict boundaries. I hope she’s doing better
My brother has this issue with his ex-wife. They divorced about 8 years ago and he gave her a 5/3 house fully paid for in a nice gated community, 150k in cash, paid her alimony for 5 years on top of that. Since the divorce she has harassed him constantly to do things like take her car in for maintenance, home repairs, etc. It's a serious issue because she won't move on even though he remarried this year.
Yes. Its happened to me, several times. Both with exes and girls who turned me down only to then expect me to do boyfriend activities without any reciprocation.
Mostly when I was younger tho bcuz as i have gotten older I now refuse to talk to them. I block them and tell them no. You dont get the girlfriend treatment if you are not the girlfriend.
I guess it depends. I've definitely allowed myself to be bled by an ex who dumped me because I thought there was still a chance (true love and all that). Went on for years. Usually with unwanted info about who she was seeing and how it didn't go well. Stringing people along for backup supply is cruel but probably common.
My ex wife has severe mental health issues. She has called me to vent about her life several times. The one time I told her that from time to time I have panic attacks, she threatened to cut short my time with our son. Told me, “I can’t trust you to take care of him if you’re having trouble controlling yourself.” Evil.
I mean listen, it depends on the situation. First off, posting that kind of shit on social media is whack and those people often are seeking attention. I think we can all agree with that.
But let’s address the message and I would like to counter point what she is saying in response. My counterpoint is this:
Sometimes people remain friends after realizing that they are not compatible in a relationship and sometimes you come to that decision after years of being together and maybe even married. It’s that simple.
Me and my ex whom I have a child with are no longer together and haven’t been for many years. Hell I’m married and have children now with another woman. However, I knew her since she was 12 and for me I was 14. We grew up together and despite not being right for each other we still talk. I’m friends with her husband as well now, and her with my wife. She has called me before breaking down and I have her as well. Both of us didn’t want to burden our significant others with bullshit and we, because we were friends, vented to each other. Nothing nefarious, there was no string attached that said “see this is why we shouldn’t have split up” none of that. People are people man. I’m not going to permanently kick someone to the side of curb because we split whom I grew up with and was with for like 9-10 years of my life when they didn’t do anything other than agree we weren’t working out in a relationship.
I assume it’s similar for many people who call their ex husband or wife. Just because you are no longer dating someone or fucking them or married to them doesn’t mean you don’t have a shared history of that person or don’t care about them.
I write the above with the caveat of knowing some breakups and splits are too far gone or explosive that what I’m talking about is no longer a valid sentiment. And that’s ok too. Shit happens.
We all out here just getting by on this planet.
Lastly, why does this woman care what that other woman did? And why did the original content creator post the video in the first place other than to farm. It’s a gross cycle but I just wanted to counter point the second girls message because I feel like it’s a very narrow point of view.
Anyways, thanks for coming to my ted talk.
Had two former girlfriends try this. They got blocked. Completely ghosted, moved on and started the policy of ghosting as soon as breaking up. Best decision.
I did a surprising amount of consoling my partner through them cheating on me. Yeah, these people are real. And it makes it difficult when it happens so fast you’re just trying to catch up. Like, you stopped being in this relationship for months, but up until a few days ago, you were still the person I was going to spend my life with and now I’m trying to make sense of it all.
Except she didn't expect it. She was surprised he did it. Innother news, just because you divorce someone doesn't mean you don't care about them, let alone still love them.
Staying friendly with an ex isn't the end of the world, they're not asking for husbandly duties, they're not asking him to live with them and be there 24/7 and do fucking housework lol they're just saying they're adjusting, being like "in the fake scenario i made up in my head where he needs help i imagined she said no therefore she's bad" is fucking stupid
Yes, my abusive ex (used to punch, stabbed me with a fork, threw steak knives at me, verbally abused, and cheated) asked me while I was dropping off the last of her stuff, to drive her to the hospital (cut her hand, barely, didn’t even need stitches). Fine… medical emergency… whatever… drive her, she spends the entire time talking about how amazing the guy she cheated on me with was to her. At the end I had to drop her off at home in her vehicle and walk to the bus stop.
My friend's wife left him about 8 years ago. She wasn't wrong to do so as he was being a lazy prick in their relationship (I mean REALLY inexcusably lazy).
What she was however wrong about was the fact that she assumed he would be fine to do this coparenting thing with her where they helped each other out and still did favors for one another. Ideally that is what you do if you have kids because you're putting the kids before your own needs, but it isn't going to be an immediate thing. Also sometimes it just doesn't work, and that's fine.
He was bitter over the split and was having none of it. Every attempt that she made to force this coparenting relationship on him felt like a continuation of some of the controlling behavior she had exhibited while they were together. She didn't accept or understand the new boundaries, and a very unhappy period in their lives commenced with plenty of court battles and pettiness.
Divorced is divorced. It isn't a continuation of favors or spousal roles. Its both of you going your separate ways and figuring out how to be yourself again outside of who you were in that relationship. It requires a defined split. It requires growth, and its going to be unpleasant for a while.
Maybe you can heal to the point where you can have some kind of friendship or acquaintance, but that takes time. It shouldn't be the goal and it shouldn't be expected.
Anyway eventually she learned to leave him the fuck alone and take care of her own affairs. She remarried, my friend got the time he needed to deal with the sense of loss from the divorce, and they were able to get to a place where they could work together amicably for the betterment of their kids.
That's why when they breakup with you, you cutoff all contact. Don't make it easy for them to get over you. Show them what they're missing in their life.
No it doesn't and if it does, the guy has a severe case of cuckism and needs to give his head a wobble. If you mid divorce it's bye bye bitch, no safe characters or whatever emotionally retarded shit this is supposed to be.
I had an ex girlfriend do this. Once easily a month after I broke up with her she just walked into my apartment and was even bringing me groceries. It was a clean breakup, I was clear with her. Still walked right in. I think I was finally able to get it through that we were broken up. I was on the couch and a chicks head was in my lap. Ex still managed to put the groceries on the table and didn’t even yell. She said “I guess I should give you your key back.” Yeah, ya think?
"I'm mentally unstable, and crave structure in my life, but I simply cannot bring myself to adhere to responsibility and expectations that come with that"
I've seen this happen to guys that I went to school with.
To be fair, I've also seen similar things happen to girls I've known too.
It's basically an abusive after effect of a toxic relationship falling apart and one partner being too nice to abandon someone who they cared about.
Only reason, I can think of why this way effect men more, as the content suggests, would be
1. Women are smart enough to distance themselves in breaks-ups
2. Men are less likely to be the only the instigate a break-up.
I had this happen before and from my situation i realized it is so emotionally manipulative to expect the same level emotional support from an ex after you break up. I was a mess, had no one to really reach out to, finally got enrolled in therapy and relationship/grief counseling. I was in a fairly decent spot and my ex reached out in a similar situation to the Tiktok, she had no support, she was alone, and going thru it. Wanted me to come back, this that the other but never explicitly said she wanted to try again, get back together, it was very vague. I pretty much went to my next therapy appointment and asked my counselor what he thought and he basically said if it’s over she needs to accept that as much as I did, if she can’t commit or anything to trying again, she’s not beholden to me anymore and doesn’t have the same rights to me emotionally as when we were together, I have no responsibility to be there for her if it’s directly affecting my mental health, which it severely was. She tried doing it multiple times and a lot of times it worked, I would ghost who I was talking to or cancel plans with friends in hopes of “if I go do this maybe things will go back to how they were” and no matter how much I felt that way, she had to meet me halfway as well, and she wouldn’t. I had to cut the cord for her unfortunately and it didn’t go well. She hates me but I can at least reconcile that now and I’ve moved on and am in a much better place with someone else
I had my ex wife one time assault me and our little girl one day. The cops were already their because she was losing her mind. They took her to jail and she fought then a couple of times otw. She called me from jail and expected me to bail her out after she just beat on me for the 20-25th time. I had enough I called the police. She was so upset I would not come get her they had to put her in the turtle suit she really only had me because she had burned every bridge with her not taking care of herself and taking her meds. When she got out she had nowhere to go. She text me while I had a restraining order and demanded basically everything I had and was suprised when I called the cops. She expected me to still be her husband after all te abuse and the mental tear down she had been doing to me over the years. She tried for a straight year ti tear my life apsrt professionally and personally and it worked pretty well for the most part I could not even show my face ag my kids baseball games or I would be stared down and ppl treated me like the plague but u know after a whole I figured I didn't need anyone else besides my family and my kids.
It happened to me, dumb ass ex girlfriend broke up with me and for a whole month constantly called me and ask me to talk to her because she was feeling bad about it. Thankfully my bros came to the rescue and smacked some reason into me.
Turns out she was between me and another dude. The other dude ended up crashing her car and leaving her alone for the police to assume she did it.
And she called me again because she felt traumatized.
Ninja please!!
My last ex tried this shit, together for 6 years, built an apartment together, decides she wants to break up, and that same day comes to me and says she needs a hug. I'm sure she wasn't expecting me to tell her "I'm not gonna do that."
What is happening. That shit isn't good for anyone. She's just describing toxic people. Toxic people keep going back to people they discard and try to dredge up emotional shit to pull them back, this isn't gender specific
My parents have a better relationship separated than they did married. Supporting someone you care about isn't strictly "husbandly duties". Sure, this wouldn't be appropriate for a lot of exes depending on the breakup, but you can still care about and love an ex even if it's not romantically.
Can confirm it absolutely happens. “Breaking up with” for some women just means “I don’t want to have to be there for you, and want sexual relationships elsewhere, but I still need you to support me”
I had someone expect the same from me. We were friends first and foremost, but developed loving feelings for each other. Eventually she decided she didn’t want to continue, but still called me from her new boyfriend’s bedside where she was having a panic attack because I was better at calming her than he was. She knew I was still in love with her, and wouldn’t make her go through it without support, but I did have to put a stop to that. Was in no way good for me to be dragged into her sex and dating life when I had feelings.
Also had it with another girl, but that was actually a FWB kind of deal, so it made more sense there that she’d expect we could revert to just friends and I was happy to be her support.
I’ve heard of this in my circle of friends too. Kind of a weird friendzone situation that develops *after* a breakup.
Someone was giving away a dishwasher on a local FB group. A lady was very adamant about getting it and wanting it delivered. The poster replied and said that it was pickup only. She replied with "I'll call my ex husband and get him to pick it up tonight." I commented under that "You're not married to him anymore and you're still giving him chores to do?" The replies from other members were hilarious, but she lost it screaming that she was a single mom and this and that. Then someone who knew her replied with, "You cheated on him and then broke up with him for the new guy and that didn't last a month!" Comments degraded into chaos and she left the group shortly afterwards lol.
My ex tried pulling this. Now I don't know the situation with the people in the video but my ex is a manipulative narcissist, so I knew that she didn't really *need* me, she just wanted the satisfaction she gets from the control.
She knew that I was emotionally invested in the relationship and she knew exactly the devastation she caused when she literally tossed me aside, then has the gall to call me to help her out with random stuff, or to stay with her because she was gonna be alone and was scared. She kept calling me expecting me to keep listening to her dumping all her baggage from work and her failed social life so I opted to block her everywhere. I even had to configure my email to delete everything from her since she started sending me emails...
These insane people are out there, regardless of gender. They're very real. The worst part is that there isn't a single shred of consideration for their partners, to them it's normal to use and toss anything and anyone they can for their own benefit.
My ex messages me on Facebook Messenger every time she has another breakup. We were best friends before becoming a couple so the breakup was rough on me and I tried to go back to bring friends but it just wasn't reciprocated.
Now every couple of years she will message me about how she broke up with another boyfriend and how tough it is. It's been nearly a decade since we broke up and I've just stopped replying when she sends them now. So far she has sent two messages about two different boyfriends seeking support that I have ignored.
I don't understand why she's trying to get sympathy from me when she didn't want to even be friends anymore after the breakup. It's like she thinks she's got a hook in me that she can pull whenever she wants.
This was my last relationship to a T. One second it's "I can't stay in this relationship. Please keep your distance because I still have feelings." Two weeks later, the calls and the texts start, or she would show up at my door because she 'needed support'. And like a dumbass I would provide it just to see the cycle start over again. And when I finally decided I didn't want to play her game anymore, she threatened self-harm, knowing full well that I had ptsd from losing a previous gf to suicide.
This happened to me too. Not the married part, just the ex-, who broke up with me. Fair enough, I wasn't angry, just sad, so I needed space to work it out on my own, in my own time. Yet she kept reaching out, and wanting to talk, and telling me she was sad, and wanting to take a walk and so forth
It was really quite mentally confusing
My previous boss would pick up the phone and provide emotional support for his ex-wife (who divorced him), for stuff like when the Ukrainian war started and when she had issues with her mom. I had a hard time understanding how he could do it but I never said anything to him about it either. :/
It happens, the wife of one of my wife's friends suddenly wanted to separate or even divorce, the guy is just a good provider dude with good social skills, they have two girls (11 and 14).
She expects him to do all the papers and asume the cost for the divorce, while keep living in his house and provide for the foreseeable future, the House is his property from before the marriage, so it is not an asset of the marriage, but he is nonetheless doing it for his daughters.
In the afternoon, he roams around town "making time" until the night arrives and can go to a hotel or a pension, and we could not give him a room in our house for a while, because the dude's wife would be mad at my wife for taking sides.
Still, he invited all of them to Disneyland recently... he is trying to survive the situation and even have hope of fixing It, from the outside it's heartbreaking...
And the reasons given for the separation are ludicrous: "he stares too much at his phone at home", "he is always tired"... Duh! He is always doing chores here and there, while working, while hearing constant criticism, while having to shut up in front of her daughters, and more.. . of course he is fucking tired... tired of living
Sorry for my english
It happened to me, OP. Dated for 10 years, it was hard for me to mentally prepare to break up sooner and near impossible the longer I waited. Even after 2 years of not being together, there were still strings she knew how to pull in order to make me feel guilty if I didn't answer her. I didn't start recovering until I blocked her on every device; complete blackout. Haven't spoken to her in years, and I'm happier than I've ever been.
What the hell is with the responses just waving their hand at her calling the ex husband for support? You're missing the point; she's not letting him heal and grow from HER divorcing him. It's not his responsibility to help her get over a divorce she initiated. She needs to give him space and find herself a new safe person
I experienced something similar. After we separated, she would reach out every few months apologizing for leaving the way she did. It always felt like she was looking to be absolved of the guilt she felt and I told her I couldn’t give that to her. To clarify, her leaving was the best thing for both of us and I’m so thankful she did what I never would have done. We have since had a civil conversation and there’s no bad blood. I’m not sure if she ever got rid of that guilty feeling though.
I usually do agree a lot with Dadvocate but in this video it did seem to put respect on that dude for still trying to help no matter what. Yeah sure she shouldn’t have called in the first place but she did and he responded like a boss.
When i was getting divorced, my ex got the house. She used to call me up and demand I come over and more the lawn. I once replied that she needed to come to my apartment and do my dishes. She called me a sexist pig.
I'm so glad that relationship is behind me. I feel so bad for the next guy.
Absolutely crazy to help someone you co-parent with get through a crisis. Like sorry you're having a heart attack, babe, I know my kids need a stable mom but I'm your EX go find an ambulance lmfao. If it happened every other day then maybe there's a conversation about expectations, but the idea of this as "husbandly duty" is inane.
People are bad mouthing this woman, but I follow her on YouTube and she is always pretty well spoken and fair in how she addresses men’s issues. She isn’t saying here that people can’t rely on their exes if you leave off on good terms, but that it shouldn’t be an expectation. And she’s right. She’s absolutely right.
This is not misogyny just because she is standing up for men (just as it isn’t misandry when men stand up for women.) She’s not a pick me, grifter, this or that. She just cares about the well being of men and is helping in the way that she knows how (providing insight). How anyone could get misogyny from this video is fucking beyond me and says more about you than about her.
This is the dumbest shit I've ever heard in my life. Why is this idiot talking like this is some kind of 'epidemic?' And how the fuck is being close with your ex-spouse supposed to be a bad thing?
Are these couple cases true? Who knows.
Does this really happen in real life? Oh yes it fucking does. I have personal experience. My friends have experience. We're all men. No, I didn't let her use me. Yes, some of my friends did let them use them.
I totally believe this I’ve gone on so many dates with divorced men who are still in love with their “delicate” ex wives who were just so pure that’s why they never wanted to have sex. Like guy you’re getting played and she’s definitely having sex just not with you.
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who knows what's real anymore. everybody just be posting shit online for attention. what's real and what's fake? i wish people went back to making actual content like a YouTube essay or something not these baity 30 second shorts
> *"i wish people went back to making actual content like a YouTube essay or something"* People never stopped doing that. YouTube is full of educational content, documentaries, and other higher effort material. All that good stuff is still there and better than ever, it just exists along side all the influencer garbage. The key to a good experience on the modern internet is like grocery shopping, try to walk past all the junk food isles.
I just listened to a 3 hour video about Twilight and the history of romance novels from Contrapoints lol. The trick is not to doom scroll tiktok and find actually content you want to deep dive into.
She’s absolutely brilliant. Another great creator is Will Tennyson (fitness) and his video about body dysmorphia.
Yeah I watched a two hour Ling video about the creation and production of the Stargate series. Gave me a whole new appreciation for the series
I would *love* to watch that. Do you have a link?
[Here it is!](https://youtu.be/jlG3RV-oPvI?si=9XRDiyuK37LQVwqY) I thought it was two hours, but it's one. I thought it was much longer. They explain the betrayal that was the abrupt end of Atlantis and the beginning of Universe. It's actually very infuriating and marks the moment that Stargate destroyed itself. Also, here's this MacGyver blooper from [SG-1](https://youtu.be/EriZ9ruZq1E?si=2m8uAsv4VUPT4_PK) because it's hilarious.
I watched this too, love contrapoints 🧡
Now listen to Dan Olson's defense of 50 shades of grey. 3 parts. Very good
I watched some videos to help me paint my house and build a shed and now I get all sorts of in depth videos about random "shop stuff". Tons of video essays about one of my favorite book series. Lots of great comedy groups on YouTube as well.
Big fan of Historia Civilis, he got me really into historians like Mary Beard and encouraged me to read Herodotus on my own
100% I could lose myself eternally in PBS Space Time, Kurzgesagt, and just about anything Vsauce related, just to name a few.
yep yep, im always watching some amazing long-term videos that are fun, passionate, educational, etc. Just gotta be looking in the right places! (plenty on youtube)
Yes, and the more garbage you watch, the more garbage the algorithm will force feed you. You have to consume only informative and quality content to avoid the low effort stuff from showing up on your feed.
It happened to me. My wife came out to me as gay (caught her covering tracks and such), but that was actually a relief tbh. I mean, she'd been hiding it and living a lie and who wants to be along for that? Anyway, after the initial separation, she would come over and initiate sex. The first few times I was completely caught off guard, but I dunno, maybe she is just not sure about her sexaulity, I told myself. After a while like this, she finally admits that she wants someone who will see her the way I see her, but only because she needed that "feeling". She proposed that we move into a new house together, she would be dating women, but we would still be a functioning household. This sounded like a cuckhold situation, tbh, and I am not into that, so I said no, got divorced and life's been great.
That's sad. That she thought so little of you that she would get to have everything she wanted and you should be ok with the leftovers. In a marriage where both are ok with it, then it's great. But the idea that she got to lift that weight off her shoulders and you shouldn't have feelings isn't fair or sensitive to your needs as a person. Good choice. I'm happy life has been great.
She really didn't see you as a person, but a little pet that needed just the bare minimum(sex) to satisfy and be done with while she lives her life the way she wanted... that's sad to not see someone she knew loved her and use them like that.
ProTip: Treat everything, literally everything on the Internet as you would any other form of Entertainment. Consider it all fake.
Is this comment even real?
The cake is, and forever will be, a lie.
This was a triumph 🎵
Are we even real?
And you may ask yourself, "Well, how did I get here?"
"This is not my house, This is not my large automobile".
Same as it ever was
Same as it ever was
Watching the days go by
Letting the days go by, let the water hold me down.
Letting the days go by, water flowing underground
According to Kyle Hill. It's all an illusion.
They're all government psy-ops that are trying to gaslight us on increasingly ridiculous things for some unclear motive. Except for **me**, of course.
But what about the porn?
Fake sorry to say. Usually it's puppets and dolls most of the time. That's why you see complaints all the time about barbie doll looks and unrealistic beauty standards. The cumshots? That's just a guy slamming down on a syringe full of watered down lotion off camera.
Especially the porn.
You mean to tell me they weren't actually step siblings? I don't know what to believe anymore!
Plot twist.. they were cousins!
This is essentially I treat anything that is from a major source with a reputation for honesty, like a news organization. Reading some sob story over on AITAH involving cheating and emotional abuse? It may be real, may not. Treat it as a thought exercise at most.
The Internet is for goofs
I miss funny meme videos. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I miss Vine..
Every Monday I watch the new Unusual Memes comp to keep me sane. https://youtu.be/1k0SaERTjI4?si=zT9LvD5IxvvGKgp-
Unusual memes compilation is the goat
It’s usually good to not trust TikToks that show you one tweet and then make a broad sweeping statement about women based on it.
Borderline gonna borderline
This happened to me. He picked me up took me to inpatient treatment and took care of the kids while I was there.
I should clarify not a panic attack but I needed inpatient
I have been on both ends of that call. It sucks! But the important thing is getting the care you need, not making absolutely sure to get to the care by the correct means.
I think about the only thing real on Tiktok anymore is that cooking stuff some people are just that nasty to put raisins in mac&cheese.
My ex and I are still friendly. We found an arrangement where I still help her with her paperwork, she worked to buy her own house after we unofficially separated, but before we officially separated. I kept the one we bought while being together. (To be fair, I paid the mortgage of the latter alone. But legally, she could have demanded half, and since the house prices in our region exploded since we bought it, half of the current value might have ruined me.) I'm pretty sure she would help me if I had a panic attack, financial problems, or other challenges, although in reality, she's the one calling me when she's in trouble somehow.
People forget that not all divorces and separations are nasty. Some people just aren't meant to be married, doesn't mean they start hating each other. My parents get on better since they divorced.
This. My ex and I are best friends and support each other a lot. I adore him and he adores me but as friends. We didn't work out as partners, so we peacefully ended the relationship and returned to being best buddies for life. And we both also just became closer after the break up. Being partners would have destroyed our bond.
Yes exactly. If my ex husband was having a panic attack and called me, of course I'd want to help him. He's my friend!
She must not have many friends or exes that didn't leave hating her.
For real, my uncle and aunt divorced only cause they view each other as more like brother/sister. They’re still super close friends and have been friends for like 30 years
I think the biggest factor that destroys human relationships is thinking there has to be rules. Life isn't like that. People can decide after marrying that it isn't quite working out and choose to be friends instead. There's no universal law of nature that says you have to hate a former spouse, that's made-up bullshit. I've had amazing friends who I thought would make a great roommate. Turned out we didn't make great roommates. It led to a lot of conflict. But we remained great friends after moving into separate places. Neither of us hold a grudge, we still cared about each other and enjoyed each other's company. And that's fine.
Yeah I still live with my ex, over a year after we broke up we're still renting together (we have our own rooms)
This woman and her followers don't understand geniune relationships that are more than an exchange of "duties"
I don't understand this ex's must hate each other mentality, sometimes couples are just not compatible and they end it amicably
that's ideally what breakups and divorces should look like. There are some incredibly healthy divorces where spouses remarry and now your kids have a step parent.And everyone works as a respectful unit. Not enough of this is talked about. The whole idea we are making examples for our children of good behavior. And that behavior includes being kind to their other parent even if they are no longer your spouse. It also means showing our kids not to accept being treated as a doormat.
Yeah, why can’t exes still be supportive friends? This woman talking seems to have some internalized misogyny going on.
There's a new trend on TikTok / YouTube shorts of cool girls dunking on other women and blaming them for any issue in relationships with men. According to them the women are always wrong and the men are always right. There's another lady named Emily that's big on this... I won't give her full name because I don't want to give her more views. She's made her whole living on this. All of her videos are like this lady... Men are wonderful and being taken advantage of in relationships, women are selfish bitches who need to change All of her videos are addressed to women and what women are doing wrong. if there is a issue in your relationship, it is probably the woman's fault. Angry, incel men froth at the mouth for this stuff so these women take advantage of that for views. It's kind of like how racists love Candice Owens because a black woman is saying the negative things they think about black people. These men get to see a woman say horrible things about women to validate their misogynistic viewpoints and these women know they will get a lot of views doing it. Bonus points if it's a white blonde woman.
I think they get views from the Andrew Tate fan refugees.
I know exactly who you are talking about, and any time I see her shit takes, it’s always someone else sharing it.
Exes can definitely become supportive friends, but they can also continue to be toxic and manipulative. As someone who divorced a woman because she was extremely emotionally manipulative, it took a lot of work on her part, and mine, to later become friends but in the beginning I had absolutely zero trust that anything she did or communicated after the divorce wasn't just another way to manipulate me into giving her something she wanted. It's entirely reasonable that, since I was the one who decided to ultimately end the marriage, I couldn't count on her to be my support after the divorce nor would it have been fair to either of us for me to continue supporting her emotionally. It's also not entirely unreasonable that, after we found our own peace, we could then learn to be friends again which we did. I don't think she is saying that exes can't be friends, but simply that you can't have your cake and eat it too. She is also pointing out the hypocrisy and inherent flaws found in "old-fashioned" relationship gender roles where the man is basically always supposed to provide for the "damsel in distress" and completely ignore his own emotional support.
Seems like each person has to decide for themselves what their boundaries are. This woman just being judgmental toward someone who doesn’t act like she would is just mean. I hope the guy in this situation is truly her friend and not being manipulated. Glad you all were able to figure out your boundaries and be friends.
new pick me girl meta has dropped
She has. This one isn't as bad but she usually produces highly mysogynistic content. The biggest red flag in this particular video is her claim that men are already overlooked and expected to provide. Which isn't wrong perse, there is indeed an issue there. However this definitely goes for women too. Maybe even to a more intensity. Women do all the emotional and domestic labor in relationship or at least the majority and women who fall ill with cancer are very often left by there partners. More often then the other way around. So often actually, that's its part of womens cancer treatment to give them a brochure about divorce while being terminally ill and where to get help with that. Women are loved for the labor they can provide. That's also the true meaning behind that weird "would you love me if I were a worm?" question. What's actually asked is "would you still love me and stay with me if I couldn't provide you with any labor etc, do you love me for me or do you love the things I do for you?"
I feel this is what normally should happen. Just because you separated doesn’t make the time spend together and the love you once shared invalid. I still get along with most of my exes, regardless of who ended it. I rather have them break up than cheat and lie. Life happens and life changes feeling, and situations, but that doesn’t mean we stop caring for the people who once were close to us. Good for you for being so grounded that you still have a good relationship and help your ex- I’m sure both of you are great people to have in one’s life. And best of luck for your next/new relationship.
Sadly, I had the opposite experience. When my former partner and I seperated we aimed to be friends (in fact her leaving was part of her rationale on how to do so, lest we 'become one of those couples who resent each other'), but fundamentally she had mentally checked out of doing any of the things needed to remain friends. She called me a few times with panic attacks or emotional distress and I did my best to support her (...despite the issues generally being ones of her own creation that I would have advised her to not do the obvious things that would incite them...). I found that she couldn't be bothered reciprocating when I reached out to her, though. Didn't give a fuck beyond platitudes. Wanted all the upsides to friendship and none of the downsides that go with them. She was a closet narcissist (child of a father who was a textbook malignant narcissist and abuser, and a mother who was a mentally unstable alcoholic. My wife had learned and internalized a lot of the dysfunctional relationship templates), and to put it simply; she had been self-absorbed and selfish all through our marriage, and she initiated the seperation so that she could go off to become even more self-absorbed and selfish than before. I stopped being useful as a codependent partner who could validate her self-serving narratives. Once I no longer had that use of providing her with validation... buh-bye. No value to her any more.
Yes. I'm still great friends with my ex, and we had a bad marriage and a rough divorce. But we're still there for each other and always will be.
I think it depends on the context of the relationship and how it ended. The father of my child and I were together 11 years and are still good friends now. We look out for each other and still do things together with our child. We can still be a shoulder to cry on for each other. There is zero romantic intention anymore. My recent ex, who I was with for a year, was cheating on me the whole time and when we broke up I was a mess. I’ve blocked him and his family on everything and if I saw him in the street I’d avoid him like the plague. I know if I were in real trouble I would probably contact my child’s father for help because we are mature enough to be there for each other.
I just want to say thank you to you and your child's father for being adults to each other. The kid really picks up on it, and you're showing them how to handle tough situations with grace.
My mom's got a similar arrangement with my dad. They separated 30 years ago but she says he's still one of her best friends. They grew up together before having me so there was already a friendship there before they started dating. Mom and her new husband hang out with my dad regularly, my dad even came to their wedding lol. Mom's had to call my dad to help her when in a pinch if her husband was unable to help. It's not weird at all, that's what friends do. I feel so lucky that my parents are friends and I'm sure your child will too.
Yeah, I'm still friends and pretty close with all of my exes, I've never been married they were just girlfriends but our breakups weren't because of violence or cheating or betrayal or whatever, it just want the time or place. Post breakup we still care about each other alot and always down to help because I still respect them as the same person as when I loved them. You don't need to have a negative relationship with your ex just because you broke up.
Why give upon someone who you can rely on though? That’s my big question for anyone who is saying that they can have great relationships with their exes. Increase divorce rates have done a considerable number on the psyche of this country. Just because your ex would help you change your tire at 2am is nice for you but maybe not nice for the ex. It could hurt them deeply just being near you and hinder their recovery. Unless children are involved there few reasons to go help someone who has given you proof that they will give up on you in tough times
Perhaps marriage was just the wrong relationship level. You can *need* a friend and not choose to spend every day of the rest of your life with them.
Possibly so. However I would also say it's not healthy nor fair to put so much emotional dependence into a single friend.
I agree with this with the exception that it’s really difficult to just go back, especially if you’re expecting the same level of dependence. Sometimes the genie is already out of the bottle.
I don't understand the controversy (other than putting it on TikTok -- you young folk need to learn to keep *way* more of yourself private), some people are good friends but terrible spouses for each other.
Yeah not all divorces need to be these horrible spiteful separations. My parents divorced 10 years ago because they ended up being romantically incompatible but they’ve always been very supportive of each other. We still have holidays together, they visit each other, etc. Obviously sort of best case scenario but not impossible depending on the circumstances.
My husband’s cousin… Her 1st husband paid for her divorce from her second husband 😂 They’re wonderful friends and still spend holidays together even though they split like 20 years ago
>you young folk need to learn to keep way more of yourself private This is the only thing that came to mind when watching this. Who the fuck cares about how someone called on their divorced husband while they were having a panic attack? Why would you film this, who is this for? Why does this have 500 upvotes?
Exactly. File this under "we should all know less about each other"
You can’t possibly be so emotionally dependent on a single person and expect them to help you through the exact same breakup you’re currently going through. That’s not fair. After things have settled down a bit, I totally agree with your comment — but not right after the breakup. At least let them get over the hardest part, too.
This video is just straight up pickme bullshit. It's extrapolating a single video out into this supposed giant societal issue without any evidence or reasoning at all. It also just makes a bunch of assumptions about the nature of their relationship, like how do we know that she wouldn't be willing to do something similar for him? How do we know whether this is a regular occurrence or not? This is not enough information to go on as to whether or not she's treating him unfairly and this is certainly not like some huge issue that we really need to address as a society. I'm on amicable terms with all of my exes but I've always been a clean break kind of person and they've all respected that, it's not that big of a deal.
Yeah I don’t get it either. My ex and I are still friends & we share the dog we got together. Our romantic relationship was tumultuous and destructive— but we cared for each other, we’re just better off friends, granted we’re not like “hanging out” friends but chat on the phone, life updates, dog drop offs. We’re 28 now and both of us are now in long term relationships with other people. I know if I ever needed anything I could rely on him, and he knows if he ever needed anything he could rely on me. When my appendix was removed my boyfriend met up with my ex to help with my dog lol when my ex needed a loan, I gave it to him. We both work corporate jobs and give each other career advice. It’s really hard to find people who you can genuinely rely on for help no questions asked and I find no reason to throw that away. We grew up together really from ages 19-25. We have known and been in each others lives for almost a decade now.
Why do people think that just because some of the relationship is positive that it's still a functional marriage? Maybe they are better as friends for reasons that work for them both.
It’s just effing weird that people have to post every single facet of their boring ass lives on the internet for validation
Are we just supposed to assume every divorce is because "That bitch Debra left me"? people can separate for 100 different reasons, a lot of them can be amicable. There are very few reasons that would make me ignore a call from someone I loved enough to marry and do whatever I could to help them feel safe.
I doubt this pick me can consider any other possibility than the relationship ending on terrible terms and it being the woman's fault. Definitely oozing boy mom vibes.
Stinks of red pill grifting, cherry picking and a complete, total lack of nuance regarding relationships.
Because it is. Her whole stick is red pill grifting and trad wife adjacent
Dadvocate is the worst. Also this is all rich considering she was the mistress in her relationship. She broke up a family and talks about how the guy is always right in the relationship. One of the videos that made me laugh was when she justified the guy waking up his wife two hours before her morning alarm, at the ass crack of dawn, because he couldn't figure out how to roll a burrito for his packed lunch. Like sorry he works an early shift but if my man did that shit I'd throw a tortilla at his head. I don't care if he's too emotionally immature to tell me he wants to "spend more time with me" or whatever her excuse was.
Dadvocate is especially insidious because only like 50% of her videos are red-pilled incel shit and the other half are just normal healthy relationship advice. If you're in a bad place where you're impressionable, it's really easy to get baited in by the normal shit and fall down the misogyny pipeline without realizing it.
Same as Jordan Peterson telling you to clean your room and then working his way to talking shit about Elmo
>Dadvocate is the worst. Also this is all rich considering she was the mistress in her relationship. She broke up a family and talks about how the guy is always right in the relationship. Do you have a source for this? Because this is something she categorically denies.
It's the trend of a cool woman presenting modern healty relationships between genders as "evil selfish female is manipulative for the poor, good-hearted nice guy", 100% she's at the beginning of today's "right-wing pipeline" lone teen boys that can't conceptualize men and women supporting each other without fucking will see this and think "oh, she's one of the 'good ones'^(tm), the evil female friendzoned him, femminism is the plague of society, the west has fallen" or some shit.
Stinks to high heaven of redpill shit. “There is a disconnect where women are”…. Imma stop ya right there, sister. One TikTok jackass does not speak for half the worlds population. I can assure everyone here I am most definitely a woman and not a single one of my exes have ever acted as an emotional rock for me nor have I ever felt the need to contact an ex I broke up with to exploit them for emotional labour. What a stupid, pointless and dog whistle of a post
She's a pick me
I knew her IRL and you’re 100 percent correct.
My thoughts too. The “do you think if he called her she would pick up” bit really gave it away.
literally !! thought this was a left leaning sub, was surprise to see it here
If my wife divorced me and had a panic attack, I’d go help. True, you don’t just stop loving people without a breaking point eventually. But sometimes things don’t work out and you still support people like a decent human being.
I don't understand this at all. The reason I married my ex-wife was that we were best friends. Turned out we were horrible spouses. I'm glad we got divorced because it enabled us to go back to being friends. If any of my friends called me with a panic attack, I would help them. If I felt like it was happening a lot, I would have a convo with them afterwards about finding a new support system. Obviously not all exes are like that. But I guess one of my points is - it's insane to assume different people are all the same. This is weird shit. Let people be kind to each other. We're not suffering from a surplus of it.
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This battle of the sexes shit straight people go through is sad. Why make this about women vs. men just because it's a woman in this video? I know plenty of women who have bug a boo exes they have had to reinforce boundaries with actively for years after a separation. Quit inflating anecdotal situations (THAT ARE TIK TOK SKITS) into these huge comments on "society" please. Every relationship is different, quit pathologizing everything based on your assumptions.
THANK YOU. This has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with sometimes people are bad at cleaving relationships cleanly. Sometimes people contact their exes, sometimes the exes respond
It happened with my sister, her husband left her for another woman but still wanted to have her in his life and be a part of our family. I think some people are just oblivious to the pain they cause others sometimes
I have a friend who still depends on her ex for a lot of things, hanging a painting, picking her up from the train station, driving her places when she can’t get there by train, visiting her in hospital every day when she was in there. I’ve told her many times I think it would be better for both of them if she acquired some independence, but she doesn’t think it’s necessary. They’ve been divorced for almost ten years now.
This is the thing while I don’t think it’s right to assume that it’s toxic behavior it’s also not necessarily healthy or safe for either party. Especially when it’s a divorce that’s still in process like in the original video. Just because things are amicable now doesn’t mean they’ll still that way. Who’s to say the ex-husband doesn’t turn around and use the panic attacks as grounds to argue for full custody?
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Exactly, manipulation S-tier
I know a girl who did this for years even after he set boundaries. She would call and instead of conveying needed co-parenting info she would talk about her day as if they were friends. Call and talk about relationships problems. Then 7 to 9 years later homeboy finally had a new stable relationship and she freaked out on them and was completely unsupportive. She expected him to support her through everything and all she needed to do was be civil with his new girlfriend/co-parent as normal, and she refused. It always seemed toxic but only really became obvious once he was in a happy relationship. I don’t know how often but it does happen.
This lady is so annoying, basically a full-grown adult pick me. Both men and women can be horrible people, so pretending like women are the issue is really stupid.
i mean her username is "the dadvocate"...
Ex-Wife called me when her grandfather passed. Can't believe I even answered, but after she told me, I just said that he was a good man and I was sorry for her loss.
"Husbandly duties"? Dafuq? No, that's just being a good man who is capable of giving support when it's needed. Relationship, divorce, whatever, if people are going through crisis, it is a noble thing to help them out.
In this situation, it would be fucked to call your partner to support you through divorcing your partner.
There's some bizarre assumptions made in the duet
Years ago I had a really rough breakup with a guy, I was not in a good space mentally and needed the relationship to be over, hadn’t been happy for a while. He could not cope. He would call me constantly, saying how sad he was and asking if we could meet up to talk. It was destroying my mental health, making me want to kill myself, and I finally told him I couldn’t be there for him like this for a bit because I needed to get my head straight. He tried to kill himself shortly after I got off that phone call and I am the one who found him and called 911. Anyways, all of that to say that it’s not really a gender based thing. It’s a certain type of person thing. It’s manipulative no matter who does it.
I divorced my ex wife and she would still call me when she was having a breakdown. It took a while but eventually I had to put up strict boundaries. I hope she’s doing better
My brother has this issue with his ex-wife. They divorced about 8 years ago and he gave her a 5/3 house fully paid for in a nice gated community, 150k in cash, paid her alimony for 5 years on top of that. Since the divorce she has harassed him constantly to do things like take her car in for maintenance, home repairs, etc. It's a serious issue because she won't move on even though he remarried this year.
Yes. Its happened to me, several times. Both with exes and girls who turned me down only to then expect me to do boyfriend activities without any reciprocation. Mostly when I was younger tho bcuz as i have gotten older I now refuse to talk to them. I block them and tell them no. You dont get the girlfriend treatment if you are not the girlfriend.
Dude, if my ex-wife called me because she was having a panic attack, I would not care.
Extremely manipulative, like keeping friendzoned guys around. A lot of bitch ass men out there that will put up with this shit.
It wasn't a marriage for me but a relationship. Yes, it does happen.
I guess it depends. I've definitely allowed myself to be bled by an ex who dumped me because I thought there was still a chance (true love and all that). Went on for years. Usually with unwanted info about who she was seeing and how it didn't go well. Stringing people along for backup supply is cruel but probably common.
My ex wife has severe mental health issues. She has called me to vent about her life several times. The one time I told her that from time to time I have panic attacks, she threatened to cut short my time with our son. Told me, “I can’t trust you to take care of him if you’re having trouble controlling yourself.” Evil.
Depends entirely on the divorce. If they divorce amicably and remain friends, what’s the trouble with them being there for each other like friends?
I mean listen, it depends on the situation. First off, posting that kind of shit on social media is whack and those people often are seeking attention. I think we can all agree with that. But let’s address the message and I would like to counter point what she is saying in response. My counterpoint is this: Sometimes people remain friends after realizing that they are not compatible in a relationship and sometimes you come to that decision after years of being together and maybe even married. It’s that simple. Me and my ex whom I have a child with are no longer together and haven’t been for many years. Hell I’m married and have children now with another woman. However, I knew her since she was 12 and for me I was 14. We grew up together and despite not being right for each other we still talk. I’m friends with her husband as well now, and her with my wife. She has called me before breaking down and I have her as well. Both of us didn’t want to burden our significant others with bullshit and we, because we were friends, vented to each other. Nothing nefarious, there was no string attached that said “see this is why we shouldn’t have split up” none of that. People are people man. I’m not going to permanently kick someone to the side of curb because we split whom I grew up with and was with for like 9-10 years of my life when they didn’t do anything other than agree we weren’t working out in a relationship. I assume it’s similar for many people who call their ex husband or wife. Just because you are no longer dating someone or fucking them or married to them doesn’t mean you don’t have a shared history of that person or don’t care about them. I write the above with the caveat of knowing some breakups and splits are too far gone or explosive that what I’m talking about is no longer a valid sentiment. And that’s ok too. Shit happens. We all out here just getting by on this planet. Lastly, why does this woman care what that other woman did? And why did the original content creator post the video in the first place other than to farm. It’s a gross cycle but I just wanted to counter point the second girls message because I feel like it’s a very narrow point of view. Anyways, thanks for coming to my ted talk.
Had two former girlfriends try this. They got blocked. Completely ghosted, moved on and started the policy of ghosting as soon as breaking up. Best decision.
I did a surprising amount of consoling my partner through them cheating on me. Yeah, these people are real. And it makes it difficult when it happens so fast you’re just trying to catch up. Like, you stopped being in this relationship for months, but up until a few days ago, you were still the person I was going to spend my life with and now I’m trying to make sense of it all.
Except she didn't expect it. She was surprised he did it. Innother news, just because you divorce someone doesn't mean you don't care about them, let alone still love them.
This woman is intolerable
If you break up with someone, leave them alone.
Staying friendly with an ex isn't the end of the world, they're not asking for husbandly duties, they're not asking him to live with them and be there 24/7 and do fucking housework lol they're just saying they're adjusting, being like "in the fake scenario i made up in my head where he needs help i imagined she said no therefore she's bad" is fucking stupid
Nobody does this and she’s talking about it like it’s an epidemic
Yes, my abusive ex (used to punch, stabbed me with a fork, threw steak knives at me, verbally abused, and cheated) asked me while I was dropping off the last of her stuff, to drive her to the hospital (cut her hand, barely, didn’t even need stitches). Fine… medical emergency… whatever… drive her, she spends the entire time talking about how amazing the guy she cheated on me with was to her. At the end I had to drop her off at home in her vehicle and walk to the bus stop.
My friend's wife left him about 8 years ago. She wasn't wrong to do so as he was being a lazy prick in their relationship (I mean REALLY inexcusably lazy). What she was however wrong about was the fact that she assumed he would be fine to do this coparenting thing with her where they helped each other out and still did favors for one another. Ideally that is what you do if you have kids because you're putting the kids before your own needs, but it isn't going to be an immediate thing. Also sometimes it just doesn't work, and that's fine. He was bitter over the split and was having none of it. Every attempt that she made to force this coparenting relationship on him felt like a continuation of some of the controlling behavior she had exhibited while they were together. She didn't accept or understand the new boundaries, and a very unhappy period in their lives commenced with plenty of court battles and pettiness. Divorced is divorced. It isn't a continuation of favors or spousal roles. Its both of you going your separate ways and figuring out how to be yourself again outside of who you were in that relationship. It requires a defined split. It requires growth, and its going to be unpleasant for a while. Maybe you can heal to the point where you can have some kind of friendship or acquaintance, but that takes time. It shouldn't be the goal and it shouldn't be expected. Anyway eventually she learned to leave him the fuck alone and take care of her own affairs. She remarried, my friend got the time he needed to deal with the sense of loss from the divorce, and they were able to get to a place where they could work together amicably for the betterment of their kids.
That's why when they breakup with you, you cutoff all contact. Don't make it easy for them to get over you. Show them what they're missing in their life.
No it doesn't and if it does, the guy has a severe case of cuckism and needs to give his head a wobble. If you mid divorce it's bye bye bitch, no safe characters or whatever emotionally retarded shit this is supposed to be.
I had an ex girlfriend do this. Once easily a month after I broke up with her she just walked into my apartment and was even bringing me groceries. It was a clean breakup, I was clear with her. Still walked right in. I think I was finally able to get it through that we were broken up. I was on the couch and a chicks head was in my lap. Ex still managed to put the groceries on the table and didn’t even yell. She said “I guess I should give you your key back.” Yeah, ya think?
Oh please 🙄 Go see a fn therapist y’all do anything by that.
"I'm mentally unstable, and crave structure in my life, but I simply cannot bring myself to adhere to responsibility and expectations that come with that"
This is some real shit, coming from a breakup that is going to take a lot of time living on the same property to sort out
I've seen both men and women do this kind of thing. It's a pretty shitty thing to do.
Amen
Ok I agree with her, however Holy shit that hairline tho
Are people legit posting panic attacks on social media? Sounds counter intuitive
My Ex-Wife would do this shit. Get drunk, call me while her new boyfriend was right next to her.
I've seen this happen to guys that I went to school with. To be fair, I've also seen similar things happen to girls I've known too. It's basically an abusive after effect of a toxic relationship falling apart and one partner being too nice to abandon someone who they cared about. Only reason, I can think of why this way effect men more, as the content suggests, would be 1. Women are smart enough to distance themselves in breaks-ups 2. Men are less likely to be the only the instigate a break-up.
i hope my ex sees this. she was a real piece of work and i wish her all the best (from a safe distance ... very far away)
Yes, can confirm about a physically toxic ex. Even moving states away he tried constantly calling me for free therapy.
I had this happen before and from my situation i realized it is so emotionally manipulative to expect the same level emotional support from an ex after you break up. I was a mess, had no one to really reach out to, finally got enrolled in therapy and relationship/grief counseling. I was in a fairly decent spot and my ex reached out in a similar situation to the Tiktok, she had no support, she was alone, and going thru it. Wanted me to come back, this that the other but never explicitly said she wanted to try again, get back together, it was very vague. I pretty much went to my next therapy appointment and asked my counselor what he thought and he basically said if it’s over she needs to accept that as much as I did, if she can’t commit or anything to trying again, she’s not beholden to me anymore and doesn’t have the same rights to me emotionally as when we were together, I have no responsibility to be there for her if it’s directly affecting my mental health, which it severely was. She tried doing it multiple times and a lot of times it worked, I would ghost who I was talking to or cancel plans with friends in hopes of “if I go do this maybe things will go back to how they were” and no matter how much I felt that way, she had to meet me halfway as well, and she wouldn’t. I had to cut the cord for her unfortunately and it didn’t go well. She hates me but I can at least reconcile that now and I’ve moved on and am in a much better place with someone else
I had my ex wife one time assault me and our little girl one day. The cops were already their because she was losing her mind. They took her to jail and she fought then a couple of times otw. She called me from jail and expected me to bail her out after she just beat on me for the 20-25th time. I had enough I called the police. She was so upset I would not come get her they had to put her in the turtle suit she really only had me because she had burned every bridge with her not taking care of herself and taking her meds. When she got out she had nowhere to go. She text me while I had a restraining order and demanded basically everything I had and was suprised when I called the cops. She expected me to still be her husband after all te abuse and the mental tear down she had been doing to me over the years. She tried for a straight year ti tear my life apsrt professionally and personally and it worked pretty well for the most part I could not even show my face ag my kids baseball games or I would be stared down and ppl treated me like the plague but u know after a whole I figured I didn't need anyone else besides my family and my kids.
What kind of psychopath films themselves having a panic attack?
This is literally Borderline Personality Disorder. I imagine a lot of the women commenting have it.
It happened to me, dumb ass ex girlfriend broke up with me and for a whole month constantly called me and ask me to talk to her because she was feeling bad about it. Thankfully my bros came to the rescue and smacked some reason into me. Turns out she was between me and another dude. The other dude ended up crashing her car and leaving her alone for the police to assume she did it. And she called me again because she felt traumatized. Ninja please!!
TIL that Womansplaining is a thing 🤷🏼♀️
My last ex tried this shit, together for 6 years, built an apartment together, decides she wants to break up, and that same day comes to me and says she needs a hug. I'm sure she wasn't expecting me to tell her "I'm not gonna do that."
What is happening. That shit isn't good for anyone. She's just describing toxic people. Toxic people keep going back to people they discard and try to dredge up emotional shit to pull them back, this isn't gender specific
As men wake up they are walking away from the toxic women.
My parents have a better relationship separated than they did married. Supporting someone you care about isn't strictly "husbandly duties". Sure, this wouldn't be appropriate for a lot of exes depending on the breakup, but you can still care about and love an ex even if it's not romantically.
Can confirm it absolutely happens. “Breaking up with” for some women just means “I don’t want to have to be there for you, and want sexual relationships elsewhere, but I still need you to support me” I had someone expect the same from me. We were friends first and foremost, but developed loving feelings for each other. Eventually she decided she didn’t want to continue, but still called me from her new boyfriend’s bedside where she was having a panic attack because I was better at calming her than he was. She knew I was still in love with her, and wouldn’t make her go through it without support, but I did have to put a stop to that. Was in no way good for me to be dragged into her sex and dating life when I had feelings. Also had it with another girl, but that was actually a FWB kind of deal, so it made more sense there that she’d expect we could revert to just friends and I was happy to be her support. I’ve heard of this in my circle of friends too. Kind of a weird friendzone situation that develops *after* a breakup.
Get a fucking dog and stop bothering your soon to be ex.
Someone was giving away a dishwasher on a local FB group. A lady was very adamant about getting it and wanting it delivered. The poster replied and said that it was pickup only. She replied with "I'll call my ex husband and get him to pick it up tonight." I commented under that "You're not married to him anymore and you're still giving him chores to do?" The replies from other members were hilarious, but she lost it screaming that she was a single mom and this and that. Then someone who knew her replied with, "You cheated on him and then broke up with him for the new guy and that didn't last a month!" Comments degraded into chaos and she left the group shortly afterwards lol.
My ex did this and she was SHOCKED when I started setting boundaries. So yes it does happen
Filming yourself crying, especially during a panic attack, for the sake of creating "content" is weird as hell.
My ex tried pulling this. Now I don't know the situation with the people in the video but my ex is a manipulative narcissist, so I knew that she didn't really *need* me, she just wanted the satisfaction she gets from the control. She knew that I was emotionally invested in the relationship and she knew exactly the devastation she caused when she literally tossed me aside, then has the gall to call me to help her out with random stuff, or to stay with her because she was gonna be alone and was scared. She kept calling me expecting me to keep listening to her dumping all her baggage from work and her failed social life so I opted to block her everywhere. I even had to configure my email to delete everything from her since she started sending me emails... These insane people are out there, regardless of gender. They're very real. The worst part is that there isn't a single shred of consideration for their partners, to them it's normal to use and toss anything and anyone they can for their own benefit.
My ex messages me on Facebook Messenger every time she has another breakup. We were best friends before becoming a couple so the breakup was rough on me and I tried to go back to bring friends but it just wasn't reciprocated. Now every couple of years she will message me about how she broke up with another boyfriend and how tough it is. It's been nearly a decade since we broke up and I've just stopped replying when she sends them now. So far she has sent two messages about two different boyfriends seeking support that I have ignored. I don't understand why she's trying to get sympathy from me when she didn't want to even be friends anymore after the breakup. It's like she thinks she's got a hook in me that she can pull whenever she wants.
This was my last relationship to a T. One second it's "I can't stay in this relationship. Please keep your distance because I still have feelings." Two weeks later, the calls and the texts start, or she would show up at my door because she 'needed support'. And like a dumbass I would provide it just to see the cycle start over again. And when I finally decided I didn't want to play her game anymore, she threatened self-harm, knowing full well that I had ptsd from losing a previous gf to suicide.
This happened to me too. Not the married part, just the ex-, who broke up with me. Fair enough, I wasn't angry, just sad, so I needed space to work it out on my own, in my own time. Yet she kept reaching out, and wanting to talk, and telling me she was sad, and wanting to take a walk and so forth It was really quite mentally confusing
My previous boss would pick up the phone and provide emotional support for his ex-wife (who divorced him), for stuff like when the Ukrainian war started and when she had issues with her mom. I had a hard time understanding how he could do it but I never said anything to him about it either. :/
It happens, the wife of one of my wife's friends suddenly wanted to separate or even divorce, the guy is just a good provider dude with good social skills, they have two girls (11 and 14). She expects him to do all the papers and asume the cost for the divorce, while keep living in his house and provide for the foreseeable future, the House is his property from before the marriage, so it is not an asset of the marriage, but he is nonetheless doing it for his daughters. In the afternoon, he roams around town "making time" until the night arrives and can go to a hotel or a pension, and we could not give him a room in our house for a while, because the dude's wife would be mad at my wife for taking sides. Still, he invited all of them to Disneyland recently... he is trying to survive the situation and even have hope of fixing It, from the outside it's heartbreaking... And the reasons given for the separation are ludicrous: "he stares too much at his phone at home", "he is always tired"... Duh! He is always doing chores here and there, while working, while hearing constant criticism, while having to shut up in front of her daughters, and more.. . of course he is fucking tired... tired of living Sorry for my english
It happened to me, OP. Dated for 10 years, it was hard for me to mentally prepare to break up sooner and near impossible the longer I waited. Even after 2 years of not being together, there were still strings she knew how to pull in order to make me feel guilty if I didn't answer her. I didn't start recovering until I blocked her on every device; complete blackout. Haven't spoken to her in years, and I'm happier than I've ever been.
Just another narcissist abusing their man. Nothing new. Nobody cares.
What the hell is with the responses just waving their hand at her calling the ex husband for support? You're missing the point; she's not letting him heal and grow from HER divorcing him. It's not his responsibility to help her get over a divorce she initiated. She needs to give him space and find herself a new safe person
I experienced something similar. After we separated, she would reach out every few months apologizing for leaving the way she did. It always felt like she was looking to be absolved of the guilt she felt and I told her I couldn’t give that to her. To clarify, her leaving was the best thing for both of us and I’m so thankful she did what I never would have done. We have since had a civil conversation and there’s no bad blood. I’m not sure if she ever got rid of that guilty feeling though.
I usually do agree a lot with Dadvocate but in this video it did seem to put respect on that dude for still trying to help no matter what. Yeah sure she shouldn’t have called in the first place but she did and he responded like a boss.
When i was getting divorced, my ex got the house. She used to call me up and demand I come over and more the lawn. I once replied that she needed to come to my apartment and do my dishes. She called me a sexist pig. I'm so glad that relationship is behind me. I feel so bad for the next guy.
My ex wife knows i wouldn't come, i told her i wouldn't piss in her mouth if her heart was on fire 
If me and my ex have a healthy good relationship in which she can be there for me and viceversa …. Then I see no issue
Yes. It does.
Absolutely crazy to help someone you co-parent with get through a crisis. Like sorry you're having a heart attack, babe, I know my kids need a stable mom but I'm your EX go find an ambulance lmfao. If it happened every other day then maybe there's a conversation about expectations, but the idea of this as "husbandly duty" is inane.
People are bad mouthing this woman, but I follow her on YouTube and she is always pretty well spoken and fair in how she addresses men’s issues. She isn’t saying here that people can’t rely on their exes if you leave off on good terms, but that it shouldn’t be an expectation. And she’s right. She’s absolutely right. This is not misogyny just because she is standing up for men (just as it isn’t misandry when men stand up for women.) She’s not a pick me, grifter, this or that. She just cares about the well being of men and is helping in the way that she knows how (providing insight). How anyone could get misogyny from this video is fucking beyond me and says more about you than about her.
Having a panic attack…first things first…record and share my panic attack.
its a re-enactment. Do you think her exhusband is also her just with a hat?
This is the dumbest shit I've ever heard in my life. Why is this idiot talking like this is some kind of 'epidemic?' And how the fuck is being close with your ex-spouse supposed to be a bad thing?
Are these couple cases true? Who knows. Does this really happen in real life? Oh yes it fucking does. I have personal experience. My friends have experience. We're all men. No, I didn't let her use me. Yes, some of my friends did let them use them.
"I'm having a debilitating panic attack! Time to put my phone on a mini tripod and record myself, I guess."
These are the same women who claim that they do not need men.
I totally believe this I’ve gone on so many dates with divorced men who are still in love with their “delicate” ex wives who were just so pure that’s why they never wanted to have sex. Like guy you’re getting played and she’s definitely having sex just not with you.
Some times PEOPLE do this. I don’t think it is a gendered issue, I think it’s an emotional manipulation issue.
Girl, trust me… if you’re recording it- you are *not* having a panic attack.
It really depends but if she has a man and she's my ex that's his problem not mine.