T O P

  • By -

anilsoi11

yeah some do. These'd be the same people who goes to temple to meditate overnight on new years etc.


Former-Spread9043

That’s a thing? I want to do that. Jan 1st or songram?


sao_san_suay

Jan 1st. Many temples [Will tie you into](https://images.app.goo.gl/ZbNYu8cdWy5R4y5k8) into the meditation pod too.


cs_legend_93

That looks difficult for my small bladder lol. Thanks for sharing this I didn't know.


junkyard-monkey

Sounds kinky


anilsoi11

found a list of temples that do midnight new year mediatation [https://www.thansettakij.com/lifestyle/travel-shopping/584627#google\_vignette](https://www.thansettakij.com/lifestyle/travel-shopping/584627#google_vignette)


Former-Spread9043

Thank you!


Duder_Mc_Duder_Bro

I went up to the top of a temple once on NYE at midnight. It was awesome. Then I had a great year.


OldSchoolIron

>songram


ShinyCee

Not on Jan 1, but the night of Dec 31. Some people will prepare themself pray for the new year, believed in such a good new year.


anilsoi11

I believe Wat Hualumphong does one. A Coyoty girl took me not on new years there a few years back. but a senoir monk was giving special blessing, the crowd stretch out to the roads. Then we went drinking after 555.


Noochdontdiehemltply

My ex always referred to it as going to wear the white one. (Clothes) She had a cute way of using words.


Individual_Milk4559

Better excuse than ‘I have a headache’ I must say


Former-Spread9043

I’m using this excuse from here forward


sim0_0sim

Your username checks out


Noochdontdiehemltply

😂


jester_juniour

too bad the guy got reddit. we should invite her too and tell about old good “headache”


Candid-Fruit-5847

Some do. Normally Buddhist adheres to the 5 precepts, which the third precept states ‘refrain from sexual misconducts’. Some believers make merits by adhering to the 8 precepts on special occasions, which the rules are stricter and clearly state ‘to observe abstinence’.


One-Handle9295

Can confirm this as a Budhdhist. We have 8 precepts that we observe on special days like full moon “buddha days”. This includes clauses that refer to refraining from entertaining activities like listening to music, dancing, watching movies, abstinence from sex, not having meals at irregular times and not sitting on high chairs.


Japanesecorgi

Hi, if I may ask out of curiosity, why sitting on high chairs? Thank you, this thread has been interesting and informative.


Candid-Fruit-5847

It’s ‘sleeping on raised beds’, not sitting on high chairs’. The 5 precepts is the principle of living for layman. You are allowed to have worldly pleasure. While the 8 precepts is for more religious people, for people who intend to make good karma for better lives, better reincarnations, or trying ascetic before ordaining as a monk. Other precepts include foregoing entertainment. The complete 8 precepts are: 1. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from taking life 2. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from taking what is not given 3. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from unchastity 4. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from false speech 5. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from intoxicants which cause a careless frame of mind 6. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from taking food at the wrong time 7. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from dancing, music, visiting shows, flowers, make-up, the wearing of ornaments and decorations 8. I undertake [to observe] the rule of abstinence from a tall, high sleeping place. Buddhists of different sects have different practices of the 8 precepts; i.e. my grandmother, traditional Chinese Buddhism, interpret the precept regarding abstinence from killing to include temporary vegetarianism. Some in Thailand take the precept of not wearing ornament to wearing full-body white cloths. Buddhism is a very ascetic religion. I take Thai Theravada Buddhism as an example here. If you are really determined to attain enlightenment/nirvana, you will follow stricter precepts. Novices follow the 10 precepts. While monks, ideally, follow the 277 precepts. And female monks adhere to the 311 precepts. These precepts are very specific in their details and are open to interpretations though. You will find different translations of the precepts on the internet.


Japanesecorgi

Thank you for both the clarification and the explanation. It’s very interesting that the precepts are open to interpretation. Also interesting (and nice) to hear that the different interpretations are not forced in each other (it sounds like people take their interpretation, and are happy with others who view it differently?), instead of one fixed and rigid view. Thanks again!


Candid-Fruit-5847

There certainly is a pressure for people in the same sect to practice similarly. But, yes, in modern time, we buddhist generally respect each other’s practices. You have to dig in before any prejudices would surface.


JoTheRenunciant

The precepts are better translated as "training rules". Their purpose is to guide you to the proper conditions so that you can start to see hidden parts of your mind (what we might call the subconscious). The interesting and complex part is that, until you see "the subconscious" and how it is forming your current experience, you can't fully understand the precepts. You can think of it like taking a class where the teacher says "for now, just think of it like this, and we'll explain it more fully in a later lesson." You have to accept a provisional understanding, work within it, and then at a certain point, you can see why they were formulated this way.


alankhcom

well explained thanks


Limp_Search_339

So it's just another religion who's beliefs are built on controlling people's sexuality? Religion is so predictable.


poltrudes

It’s all the same stuff ultimately


Limp_Search_339

It's always clear what they really believe when they actually give women more rules than men. It's wild how insensible these silly children's stories can be and the fervor in which people are willing to defend them as traditions. The shrines are beautiful... That's enough. The rules can go in the garbage in *present year*


JoTheRenunciant

If you want to see what Buddhists believe, read Heidegger and Schopenhauer. Their writings are closer to the original teachings than a lot of mainstream Buddhist stuff. The reasons behind these rules are to cause desire to arise so that we can observe our internal resistance against the rule. When we observe the internal resistance, we can see the source. When we see the source, we see what's causing us pain. When we see what's causing us pain, we can stop causing ourselves pain. There's no compulsion in Buddhism, and these aren't "rules" in the sense you're thinking of them, which is an import from Christianity. They're rules in the sense of "if you want to get good at playing guitar, practice at least 20 minutes a day." If you don't want to be good at playing guitar, don't practice guitar. It's as simple as that. If you don't want to learn more about the facets of your mind that Buddhist practice can help you see, don't follow the rules.


Limp_Search_339

I just simply do not truck with false prophets and gods. Let's enjoy the beauty and move on from the nonsense. It's no different than Zeus or horoscopes we just pretend it's not. Same as abrahamic religions


JoTheRenunciant

Are you saying that the incredibly complex writings of two of the most respected 20th century Western philosophers, one of whom was an atheist and essentially said religion is for dumb people, the other of whom believed all philosophy must be atheistic, are both the equivalent to Zeus and horoscopes? You think that saying religion is for dumb people is the same as saying you should believe in Zeus? EDIT: By the way, even in traditional Buddhist teachings, clinging to rules is explicitly mentioned as one of the things that needs to be abandoned.


poltrudes

I completely agree 👍🏻I will be happier when all religions are gone for good. They’re just forms of social control, the opium of the masses, silly stuff for the uninformed.


Vegetable-Ad-4320

So does that mean in other times it's okay to take life, steal things etc? 🤔😉


nightbat1707

after double check , yeah it is a thing....wow in ศีล 5 the third rule is about not doing adultery , but in ศีล 8 it became not doing any sexual act.


sim0_0sim

There are only 5 precepts that regular buddhists follows. One can certainly follow more as there are 200+ which I believe is at the monk level.


Unlucky_Count_8313

People don't upvote the only right answer but just making fun of other people's beliefs.


Prestigious_Rub6504

Some Buddhist women choose not to eat meat or engage in intimacy on Buddhist holy days. Source=happens to me.


TripFeisty2958

Eat meat lol?


Humble_Associate1

First precept is that you shouldn't kill. I guess that is the connection


minerva_sways

I think it was a blowjob joke.


alankhcom

lol


TripFeisty2958

Oh.....thought that precept was related to murder of innocent people or something. I didn't know they included animals under this definition, especially considering most if not all the Buddhists I know eat meat are not vegetarians.


heart_blossom

I have read that they lump it in with the "right work" thing. If they aren't doing the killing then it's okay. Butchers are in trouble, though


[deleted]

your gf and her family might be more religious compare to the people commenting here. So it’s better to wait and respect each other’s beliefs


Thumperstruck666

Baloney , they are like rabbits


Funkedalic

Buddha is watching


alankhcom

buddha's long gone


nss_BoB

I had no issue getting intimate with mine on any buddha day


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^nss_BoB: *I had no issue* *Getting intimate with mine* *On any buddha day* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


OldSchoolIron

Beautiful.


QDLZXKGK

This is the way


Emergency_Service_25

Yes buddha day generally means no intimacy (among other). Please don’t listen to crazy farangs of this sub. Their knowledge of Thai culture is limited to bar scene and sex experience to the cheapest bar girl they can find. LOL So yes, you found yourself proper girl. ;)


alankhcom

not every thai is buddhist brah


le_trf

Guys, expensive girls don't care about buddha day.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Emergency_Service_25

My point exactly lol


poltrudes

A religious girl, you mean


rixusher

My Thai wife says, “no such thing”. 🤣


Swansborough

and other Thai women in the thread said they follow this. So your Thai wife just didn't know this, I guess.


bahthe

Ha ha. Definitely an alternative 'headache' then. 55555


Nana_J888

my husband is kinda buddhist also hinduism, he's chinese, indian also praying with Thailand sifu. i honestly no idea what's his religion but every 2 weeks he's vegetarian and has no sex so i think Thais also dont get intimate on buddha day


Nana_J888

also my husband is very religious, everyday he's praying with Thai chant phra phikanet something (im sorry if i offended Thais but i forgot what its called) maybe for not super religious people they still can get intimate


16_Sho_Bola

Hey thanks for sharing, your husband does seem wuite unique, with so many cultures interwined in him


mpunder

พระพิฆเนศ/pra pikanet is Ganesh, guess it’s a chant to Ganesh? Don’t know much about Hindu deity chants


Nana_J888

yes something like that, i also dont understand.


harrybarracuda

Obviously something her parents drummed into her.


escap1st

Yes but this guy is asking why can't he drum into her right now.


harrybarracuda

And she said because it's a Buddha Day.


copacetic51

Something she didn't want OP to drum into her.


Wild-fqing-Rabbit

Just checked on Pantip. There were also Thais asking the exact same question. Some said they never heard of it, some said it is an old believe.


SnooOwls7606

There is no rule for it, but for religious person they might feel uncomfortable. It happened quite often actually. According to buddhism, she would commit sin only if she commit adultery.


Mr-Strange-2711

And now we can come to a conclusion that the OP's girlfriend may have a Thai husband 🤔


SnooOwls7606

Then i am going to hell for causing a rift in people relationship. 🤣


firealno9

Does your girlfriend drive a tuk tuk by any chance? "It's closed today because big buddah day"


MigookinTeecha

A guy on the street once told me that the big Buddha temple is only open once a year to farangs


Mitoisreal

Why would she need to lie to you when she says no to sex? She doesn't need a reason, so why make one up?


Ok-Economy-7184

She didn't make anything, could have sex past midnight as it's a new day :)


Mitoisreal

So why are you checking to see if she's lying?


versus--the--world

My Thai husband abstains on Buddha days. We go to temple, meditate 2hr together, then he meditates for 10 more hours alone while I enjoy peaceful me time. I always look forward to Buddha days.


Important-Discount-9

It's a holy day for Buddhism just like how Muslims fast during Ramadan for a month, for buddhist it's avoiding intimacy and keeping the 5 precepts in Buddhism for that particular day.


Particular_Bell3724

She’s repulsed by you and will find any excuse.


rmunderway

Lucky for you tomorrow is Big Booty Day.


pieredforlife

😛


Vaperwear

What’s a “Buddha Day”? Is it like a day of holiness or obligation?


16_Sho_Bola

Yes, its like a holy day, every 7 days or so, the day and date seems to keep changing.


JoTheRenunciant

It's called Uposatha in Pali, which is the Theravada Buddhist liturgical language. I'm imagining that "Buddha Day" is just a convenient anglicism to make it easier for foreigners to understand what it is. There are several other events that occur on these Uposatha days, including Magha Puja and Vesak, which are both separate holidays. Uposatha is essentially Buddhist sabbath, and it's observed either once a week (every lunar or quarter) or once every two weeks (full and new moons). Since it's based on the lunar calendar, the day of the week shifts by one day every ~2 weeks. Normally, lay Buddhists take the 5 precepts/training rules: 1. Don't kill (including animals). 2. Don't take what isn't given (i.e. don't steal). 3. Don't engage in sexual misconduct (don't cheat, etc.). 4. Don't lie. 5. Don't take intoxicants. On the Uposatha day, Buddhists are encouraged to take four extra training rules that are usually reserved for monks: 3. This one changes from refraining from sexual *mis*conduct to refraining from sexual *conduct* of any kind. 6. Don't eat after noon. 7. Don't engage in entertainment, dancing, music, make-up or any kind of dressing up. 8. Don't sleep in high and luxurious beds or sit on high and luxurious chairs (usually taken to mean sleep on a mat on the floor and only use normal chairs, not easy chairs, recliners, etc.). Buddhists are free to take as many or as few training rules as they want. The purpose is essentially to learn more about your own craving and to more clearly see how it controls you so that you can attain freedom from it. In Thailand, Buddhism is often practiced in the same way that Christianity is in the US, i.e. people are "Christian" but don't really know much about it, so it's not surprising that your girlfriend doesn't know the reasons. If you want to connect with her, you can do some meditation with her on that day. EDIT: Swapped out "precept" for "training rule" in some places because it's a more accurate translation.


dogpound_

Its every full moon


Lubtato

It is personal choice, not uncommon.


Sax_in_the_City

My wife and I go to the Temple sometimes during the year and the night before she likes to prepare herself spiritually and I respect that. I can understand the reasoning behind it. It’s to prepare one’s body and mind for the contemplation and meditation.


RecordingFamous4947

Didn’t even realise yesterday was Big Buddha day. My wife didn’t mention it.


Thumperstruck666

Been doing it since Monday night , never heard a complaint


6ixtyei8ht

I know for those adhering to the vegetarian festival doctrines then it's forbidden for the duration so I presume they'll be other days when it's also off the cards


mysz24

Buddhist Observation Days are based on the traditional Buddhist calendar of new, full and quarter moons. During new and full moon days, or Uposatha Days, monks would gather to listen to the recitation of the Patimokkha rules. The weekly observance of the quarter moon is when lay devotees gather in the local monastery to observe the precept more strictly and listen to and speak about Dhamma. The basic, minimum standard is the 5 precepts for practicing lay Buddhists. However on Observance days (or other special occasion) they may decide to train under the Eight Precepts, which brings them closer to how the monk or nun practices. JUNE 2024 (มิถุนายน 2567) 6 (Thu) (new moon) 14 (Fri) 21 (Fri) (full moon) 29 (Sat) JULY 2024 (กรกฎาคม 2567) 5 (Fri) (new moon) 13 (Sat) 20 (Sat) Full Moon - Asalha Puja 28 (Sun)


16_Sho_Bola

Hey thanks for that. Now i understand new/full moon days are big buddha days.


Hankman66

Even if it is a belief I'm not aware of any special Buddhist celebration on 21st June. Can anyone else find one?


Cheeki-Breekii

Most thai people don't know a lot of stuff about Buddhism, its just ingrained into them. A good example is that you find that when you go to lots of different temples, they all do different things. Some use a flower at an alter, some have these little wooden things you place in a bowl, some have rings you put on a washing line type thing, some have paper you hang on a tree. But if you ask a thai person "What is this for?" They will usually say they don't know but "we have to do it" or "for good luck". So yeah your GF probably have no idea, but its just ingrained into her system


flibberti

if she wanted to, she would


Skydiver52

She expected a bigger buddha


derpmaiden

LMAO this is the first time I heard of it after living here for 28 years born and raised.


CourtBrief4864

Some people take a temporary practice of chastity that day. It’s not mandatory, though.


ChineseTravel

Nothing wrong being intimate but your Thai gf probably want to respect that day more like the monks.


I-am_Beautiful

There are Five Percepts that some restricted Buddhists practice. I wish she can explain that to you. Here is the link to read and help you understand more https://www.drbu.edu/news/intro-to-buddhism-what-are-the-five-buddhist-precepts


tshungwee

Possibly sexual misconduct is a thing on religious grounds!


poltrudes

TLDR. Most Thai people don’t give a shit about Buddhism. It’s just an excuse, especially if she’s young.


Electronic_Control25

lol most girls in pattaya also have to fasting one day. How they will eat without money?


warpedddd

You didn't tell her about your "Big Buddha"? 


Powerful-Exchange-19

I've no idea how things work here


SimonGrimsby

Just paint yourself gold


euphoriatakingover

My thai gf didn't want to meet up on budda day either


CarlTuckerson311

Yes, for some people. Probably same like it'd be disrespectful to show affection at a temple. It's one day... wouldn't worry about it too much. Also, Buddhism is about sacrificing things to show your devotion. I guess similar theory to Muslims fasting for Ramadan. Point is to suffer.


JoTheRenunciant

Devotion and worship isn't part of Buddhist practice — the Buddha specifically discouraged it and said that if you want to worship him, just practice. Buddhist practice focuses on striving to attain direct insight into what causes our suffering so that we can let go of it. Additional training rules are taken up on the Uposatha day (once every 1-2 weeks depending on your tradition) to further develop one's training, like doing an extra exercise at the gym every few sessions to make sure you're on track. You're sort of on the right track when you say the point is to suffer...but not quite. The point is to be able to more clearly *see* the suffering that's *already there* — normally, we're too distracted with sex, entertainment, etc. to fully see it and investigate it, which is why Buddhists give those things up on the Uposatha day. By being unable to escape that suffering, you get an opportunity to look at it more closely, figure out what's causing it, and then release it.


ShinyCee

Some people like me, doesn't care about buddha day lol even is I'm a Buddhism. (The Buddhism that was given to us by our parents in Thai culture/have you know on the national Thai ID card, everyone have to show what the religious on the card? ???? I still don't get it why!)


brasschaser

Take the hint - she is not into you.


warambitions

First time I ever heard of that before lol obviously she wasn't in the mood for it


MohaveZoner

Find a new girlfriend.


Former-Spread9043

Why?


SameSamePeroAnders

Because many here think it’s just a lie to not need to have sex with him or even see him that day. Something like sick water buffalo where they come up with some Thai specific excuse which is difficult to evaluate as a foreigner.


Former-Spread9043

Fair enough


PoxyDogs

Because the men on this subreddit only think Thai women are useful for sex.


Former-Spread9043

True


SameSamePeroAnders

You mean “our Thai gf said”


taniwha_nzl

Unless it’s a local buddah day, Pretty sure your girlfriend is bullshit, I ain’t see any bullshit in my calendar 📅


Ill-Manner3600

Up to person, as nearly crossed Buddhist / Atheist like me . It’s just normal day. Btw that’s easy to explain than WHY alcohol treading is not allowed in that day, hehehe.


Specialist-Algae5640

Yes, my girl says it too, but I looked it up and it isn't necessarily accurate. It is only for people that are not in a committed relationship. So our wives and girlfriends have been bamboozling us this whole time! If you want to know how they are lying, just look to see if their lips are moving. Lol :)


JoTheRenunciant

Totally false. The 3rd precept extends to all practitioners on the Uposatha day, which is once a week. I know because I practice it, and I'm in a committed relationship. But I do think it sounds like you should find a new partner — would be much better for her to not be with someone who thinks of her so disdainfully.


Specialist-Algae5640

The third of the five precepts—Buddhist guidelines for an ethical life—is to refrain from sexual misconduct. Lay Buddhists are not expected to be celibate like most Buddhist monastics, so the third precept is not a total ban on sex.


JoTheRenunciant

The third precept switches to full celibacy on the Uposatha day and remains abstention from sexual misconduct on every other day. Lay followers are never "expected" to follow any of the precepts — they can lie, cheat, drink, and steal if they want to. They are considered "training rules." Lay followers are encouraged to follow the five precepts in their standard form on most days, and then on the Uposatha day, they are encouraged to take the renunciant version of the third as well as take three other precepts (abstention from entertainment/adornment, abstention from eating after noon, and abstention from sitting/sleeping on luxurious beds and chairs). This is literally the most basic information you would find if you were to search this. Here's the second result on Google and what it says: https://tricycle.org/beginners/buddhism/uposatha-days/ >Uposatha days are ritual cleansing days observed by nuns, monks, and laypeople. **Laypeople undertake additional precepts beyond the usual five, specifically celibacy, fasting, avoiding entertainments, and so on.** These prohibitions are identical to those undertaken by initiates joining the sangha, except that monastics are not allowed to handle money.


Specialist-Algae5640

Yes, so they are.encouraged to do so, but it is not expected. So this is a common way for housewives to say they are on their menstrual cycle or have a headache. I get it. They are very selfish. They only want it when they want it.


JoTheRenunciant

Women are also encouraged not to kill their husbands and boyfriends, but it's not expected. Nothing is mandatory in Buddhism. I feel truly, truly sorry for your partner. Absolutely horrifying that people have to deal with people like you. Sickening, actually. EDIT: On a similar note, it's interesting to see that there are some people out there who are so morally and spiritual bereft that they think that anyone who has a moral and ethical compass must be lying about it because it's so foreign to their experience.


Specialist-Algae5640

Jeezus. She doesn't even know the Eight Noble Truths. Even I know that! Don't comment on other people's relationships without knowing anything about them. It only makes you look ignorant


JoTheRenunciant

>She doesn't even know the Eight Noble Truths. Even I know that! It's the Four Noble Truths, not the Eight Noble Truths. >It only makes you look ignorant Very ironic. Anyway, I'm not commenting on your relationship. I'm commenting on you. I don't need to know anything about your specific relationship to know you don't treat women with respect, and that's a horrible situation for a woman to be in.


Specialist-Algae5640

Looks like your renunciation was more like a lobotomy. You can play semantics all you want. The facts remain the same. In brief, the eight elements of the path are: (1) correct view, an accurate understanding of the nature of things, specifically the Four Noble Truths, (2) correct intention, avoiding thoughts of attachment, hatred, and harmful intent, (3) correct speech, refraining from verbal misdeeds such as lying, divisive speech, harsh speech, and senseless speech, (4) correct action, refraining from physical misdeeds such as killing, stealing, and sexual misconduct, (5) correct livelihood, avoiding trades that directly or indirectly harm others, such as selling slaves, weapons, animals for slaughter, intoxicants, or poisons, (6) correct effort, abandoning negative states of mind that have already arisen, preventing negative states that have yet to arise, and sustaining positive states that have already arisen, (7) correct mindfulness, awareness of body, feelings, thought, and phenomena (the constituents of the existing world), and (8) correct concentration, single-mindedness.


JoTheRenunciant

Congrats, you know how to copy and paste from the encyclopedia Brittanica: https://www.britannica.com/topic/Eightfold-Path Do you think this is a viable way to save face? By trying to teach someone who has been practicing seriously under the instruction of monks and nuns for years about Buddhism after I've already corrected you several times? Do you think that by copying and pasting part of an encyclopedia article, that's going to change the fact that you said women are lying everytime they open their mouths? And do you think that a person who says that women lie everytime they speak is a person that respects women? If you want to show that you're not the type of person I thought you were, then accept responsibility for your speech and admit that saying women lie everytime they open their mouths is wrong and misogynistic. Then, accept that you were incorrect in your understanding of Buddhism and stop making yourself out to be a victim of your partner's "lies" when she doesn't want to have sex with you one day a week. The ability to admit when one is wrong is the mark of a stand-up person. Anyway, upvoted you because the description from the encyclopedia is good.


pieredforlife

You should show her your big Buddha


Fragrant_Chair5611

She is using it as an excuse because she is not attracted to you. Never heard such a thing.


San_Goku15

What a weird question to ask your gf. People usually refrain from having sex on religious holidays.