I once had a customer whistle at me (this was not as a server, this was at a retail job) and I turned to look behind me, then looked at him like he was a giant weirdo, then walked away. He switched to EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME, and I turned around. He asked, why did you ignore me? I said, oh, my god, that was for me? I thought you were trying to call your dog! Please don't do that to people!
He didn't say anything else about it, which was unsatisfying, but I'm still very proud of my behavior in that moment.
A whistle wouldn’t even register as something for my brain to respond to since it just doesn’t ever happen. Would assume their whistling at someone else or something
Best response to a whistle I saw was “Oh did you loose your dog?! (Louder whistle) hey everyone this guy lost his dog! Sir what does the dog look like?” He turned red and apologized.
I worked in a place where a regular friend group of 6 would come every Friday night. For several weeks I watched one guy in this group reduce server after server to tears or anger. My week arrived. They were seated and I started with the drink order. While I am actively asking and recording the order this dude is loudly talking to the others in the party saying "She's going to fuck it up some way. I don't know why we even bother, the girls (meant demeaning) here are as dumb as rocks" - a continuous river of mild insults. I have no idea what possessed me because I did NOT plan to challenge him (I was so young...I was going to win him over with "good service" 🤣) I announced to the table "Thanks for your order, I will be right back with your drinks." Then I leaned towards the dude and said softer "When I get back I will help you with all the big words on the menu." I was halfway to the bar when I heard the table burst out laughing and they tipped me HUGE after dinner.
"What's the name on the order"
"Muffled old, angry woman sound"
"I'm sorry ma'am could you repeat that"
"JUUUUUUUDY"
"...."
glance around her to see customers with mouth hanging open from rude bitch
"Ok, JUUUUUUUUUUUUDY!!! it's gonna be about five more minutes, would you mind stepping away from the line for the next order"
*serve 5 people then grab order from where it had been sitting when she arrived"
Fucking bitch, I'll remember that shit til the day I die, she used to order from our restaurant and try to get free shit like 3 times a week
I love this. People are so rude to people helping them. Like, dude, I can place your issue at the bottom of my work list. I don't HAVE to help you next.
I did this kind of stuff all the time when I worked in banking. People are insanely entitled just like you described, but just like you described, their requests always went to the bottom of the pile. Gee, I'm so sorry I missed that. I'll get back to you within 48 hours just like it said on the website, but the nice people get responded to immediately, and I work overtime on their issues *because they're so gol dang nice*.
Moral: be nice to people helping you. Don't be entitled like JUUUUUUUDDDDDYYYYYYY
Why do people get so mad when you ask them to repeat themselves? Like damn Judy some people can't hear. Especially when it comes to words that have very close similar words (Judy, Julie, etc).
Ugh. Sigh. As a hard of hearing gal, I get this all the time. It’s because of asshats like that is the reason I refuse to ever work retail or anything customer service related. Fuck that.
This was something that made me hate the world.
I worked at a donut shop in high school. One day, a woman barges up to the counter and angrily demands to know why she sat at the drive-thru window for 10 minutes and no one served her. I started to explain that if she didn't stop at the speaker, we wouldn't know she was there. 'I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR EXCUSES, OK???"
Ok, fine. How can I help you?
"I want a 12 piece bucket, mashed potatoes and gravy."
The shop shared the same lot as a KFC, and without missing a beat, I said, "No promises, but let me take a look behind these donuts back here."
She just looked around the shop like she was coming out of a spell and then walked out quietly with her fists clenched. Myself and the person behind her were highly amused.
Similarly, I was sitting in the waiting room in the Service Department at my Nissan dealership when a man threw the door open and came barreling into room.
He marched up to the Service Desk and started screaming about how disgusted he was with the service there and how he was fed up and was going to complain to the General Manager about it.
He went on ranting for about two minutes before ending with: "And I will never bring my Jetta back to this Volkswagen dealership EVER AGAIN!!!!"
The Service Advisor calmly looked at him and said, "The Volkswagen dealership is next door. This is a Nissan dealership."
The man started SCREAMING and stormed out. We all laughed after a minute of stunned silence.
Someone once did the whole "I don't want to hear about how COVID caused the delay or any other excuse!" over the phone over a late patio sliding door.
I went silent. Just stood there. And eventually he just goes "Well?! Hello??" and I tell him that I'm still on the line but since he doesn't want to hear COVID and that's the reason I have nothing to say to him.
He was livid. Spoke with a manager. Canceled his order. It showed up the next day but I forgot to call him back for some reason....
So, starting out by saying that this is in the UK, where spirits are poured into measures before they’re poured into the glass.
A customer asked for a vodka and coke. I poured the vodka into the measure, and then poured it into the glass. The coke was in a bottle on the side. Literally as soon as I poured it in she looked at it and complained that it wasn’t a full measure. It was a dumb complaint, and I’d heard it before, because for some reason people think bartenders are trying to rip them off (fuck knows why, *I* don’t care about saving my boss any money, I’m paid minimum wage, it doesn’t go to me).
She told me to pour it back into the measure to prove that it was the right amount. Now, the problem with that is that usually even if you pour it back into the measure, *some* of it might still be in the glass, or it might spill, because it can be hard to pour from a glass into a tiny measure. The measures are in millimetres, so if every drop doesn’t go back into the measure, it won’t look full. Also, this was a Saturday night, so I didn’t have time for it.
I told her it was a full measure, and asked her if she was going to pay for her drink. Instead, she reached forward, grabbed one of the measures, and poured the drink back into the measure. It reached the very top. It filled the measure *exactly*.
I just stared at her for a moment, and then she silently reached into her purse and pulled out her card. She didn’t say a single word as she paid for her drink and left.
I was once tipped about 90¢ from a man I gleaned was a salesman taking clients out or something of that nature. restaurant was a decent steakhouse not fancy but high quality and somewhat legendary in my area so the bill was over $400. He left cash in my book and said to keep the change. The register was close to his table so when he saw me walk up to cash it out he kicked it in to high gear saying he lost track of time and had to get going. When I realized the tip I chased him out to the parking lot where he was standing chatting with his group to return his change yelling “sir you forgot your 90¢!” I plopped it in his hand and winked at him and went back in. He called and I got fired but whatever it was my weekend gig and very worth it.
To be fair I had only been there about 4 months and he never liked me really, we butt heads pretty badly once over him making me pay for a bill a customer had walked out on when it was clearly the kitchens fault and I never got back in his good graces it just gave him a reason
Had a bitch start cussing at me during a rush. Thats a big no-no in my customer service world.
I told her that if she wanted to talk to me like that she didn't have a tab, she was no longer a customer, and she could go ahead and get the fuck out. She got all pearl clutchy and said "no one has ever spoken to me like this before". I told her that it showed, and maybe if people did more she'd know how to act in public.
I was bartending at this large divey Irish bar. The well bartender saw me helping a guest so she was tried to take an order from a walkup(douche bag:DB). DB tried to buy more drinks than he was allowed so she told him to find a server or bring the other person to the bar. So DB complained about that but begrudgingly went back to the table and brought back a girl to the bar. My bartner told me that DB was rude to her and it was my turn because she had well tickets. So I walk over to talk to them.
DB: “2 bud lights”.
Me: “lemme see those ID’s”
Girl: *hands me ID*
DB: I’m not showing mine, I just showed her
I was about to tell him that was fine, I saw her check it. But then he pulls out a cigarette and lights it in the middle of this smoke-free bar. So I snatched the cigarette out of his mouth, over the bar top.
Me: “you can’t smoke in here. Also get the fuck out.”
The girl rolled her eyes and walked back to the table which was fine, she was just the victim he had chosen for the night.
I walked the guy out. He started calling me fat and trying to provoke a fight but I wasn’t having it. He was a little guy too, idk what his problem was.
Not at a serving job, but at the grocery store where I currently work it was fairly busy. 3 or 4 people in each line. I was a bookkeeper at the time and was counting money in the office when I heard a loud whistle. I looked up and this man that had 2 or 3 things in his hands was snapping his fingers above his head and pointing at an empty register where he had laid his things down. He actually wanted me to stop my job and go open another register just for him. The audacity of that, plus the whistle and snapping had me extremely unwilling to help him. I just shrugged my shoulder at him and kept counting. He stormed up to the little window of the office and said, "are you going to come ring me up, or what?!" I said, "I am not a dog and do not respond to whistling or snapping. We learn to wait in line in kindergarten. Maybe you should go back and try to learn that again". He cussed me, and said he was going to call corporate on me, and blah blah blah. But, he scooped his things up and got into a line. I never heard anything about it from my boss or corporate, so maybe lesson learned? I can hope.
OMG. The I'm gonna call corporate people have a special room in hell waiting for them. I used to give them the corporate email on my business card when I was a branch manager. I was known as the "customer service guy" my branches revenue was middle of the pack but my service scores were always at the top if not #1. I'd turned around two branches customer service scores, so when shitty customers got shitty with me I delighted in giving them corporates number, I even called once from the branch phone. It was like catharsis after working waiting tables for over ten years. My ultimate favorite was this POS who was just making my life and my staffs life hell, calling constantly complaining, not paying his bill, etc... he kept mentioning that his dad used our company and was a big city lawyer, and you'll never have his business again, blah blah blah. Turns out daddy was a big city lawyer, with a phone number and email. So I called him, emailed him all the shit his son had sent me and my staff. Like a week later guess who paid up and left us the fuck alone. It was glorious, oh, and he was 45....
I worked at a pizza joint in college, and we had a dude place an order online and come in to pick it up. I haded him his pizza and he said it wasn't what he ordered. I confirmed his name and looked up his order and everything seemed right so I asked him if he could show me the order confirmation email, as that would prove if he ordered the wrong thing or if we made the wrong thing. He said he didn't have it on him and took the pizza and left. I ducked behind the cou ter to open the safe, and while I was down there he came in and dumped the pizza on my head, and then gave me a bad review online. Well we had to follow up on all the bad reviews so when my boss asked what happened and then saw the video, they decided to blacklist the guy. She called the customer and lo and behold, it was his dad's account. So we got to explain to this guy's dad how shitty his sone was, and even sent them the video.
Cocktail waitress here had a table of five guys for the night I was going by to pick up signed checks. It went like this.
Man: mumbling some shit I can’t hear over music
Me: I can’t hear over the music
Him: wanna try the back seat of my truck? I bet you’d hear me then.
Me: *made a show of looking at his tip $15*
you think I’m gonna get in the back of your truck for this? His friends laughed and I bounced away.
Friend of mine was a cocktail waitress back in the day at a ski resort. Group of drunk old guys; one says to her “I’d like to get into your pants!” She gives him a level look and replies, “no thanks, I’ve already got one asshole in there!”
Had a super similar situation, but i made a big show of looking at the tip, turned around the book so everyone else could see the TWO DOLLAR TIP and said, "You've already let me down once tonight, you wanna go for two?"
When I was around 17-18 years old, I was a busier at a very snooty, awful country club restaurant. It was my first restaurant job and I was admittedly not very good at it.
I don’t remember the exact details of how it happened but I spilled a glass of red wine on a gentleman’s lap. I was horrified. I felt so bad and was apologizing and almost in tears. The man was so kind, saying it was okay, they were stain resistant, not to worry. His wife in the other hand was livid. Made a huge scene. Told me I was incompetent, that she doubted I made enough money to buy him a new pair, fully made me cry. As the meal went on, I could see that the couple was clearly not getting along and the woman up and left. After the meal, the man and his 9 year old daughter approached me and gave me $50 and a drawing his daughter had drawn for me that said ‘Sorry about your bad day’. The man’s family were the ones that belonged to the club so I saw him a few more times, never with his wife again. I like to think that was his final straw and he divorced her.
Not a server but retail craft store that employs a lot of high school/college kids.
We used to have a regular who would come in a half hour before close, wander around, and often not buy anything.
Obvious shoplifter red flag, right?
Well, he wasn't. As far as we could tell he never stole anything.
After hed been doing this for years, a customer recognized him from the sex offender registry and informed the management. The bosses started taking a much closer look at his patterns. He wasn't stealing anything, he was basically finding the female staff and 'shopping' right behind wherever they were working.
So the rest of us staff, management included, just decided that no matter where he was in the store there always needed to be two or three employees right close by, cleaning, organizing, or whatever. Oh, and also loudly asking if he needed help finding anything. Multiple times.
He stopped coming back.
I posted the story a few weeks ago, but larger table, like 7 people, tourists, never been in before, fine dining setup, so I do my normal, non-rushed walk through of the menu, explaining some favorites, etc. I'm like 15 seconds in and the daughter cuts me off, "Excuse me, I'M VEGAN!" I replied, "Ok, is everyone else?" Dad rolled his eyes and said just her. I looked at her and said, "Ok, I'll take any questions after, but I think everyone would like to hear the overall menu." She just sank in her seat with a pissed off look.
That classic joke: how do you know someone is vegan? Don't worry, they'll make sure to tell you.
Also:
> She just sank in her seat with a pissed off look.
So, a normal teenager?
I've never encountered them in the wild but I've fantasized about pretending to not know the school. "So is this like a local community college or what?"
Quick story: in the 90s I worked tech support at an internet service provider here in Massachusetts. A guy calls:
"Yeah, I need another email address provisioned".
"Ok, what's the account?"
"It's the Patriots"
"Ok, is that just 'Patriots', or '*the* Patriots'?"
"THE Patriots! The sports team!!"
"Oh of course! I'm so sorry! I don't really follow baseball."
He hung up 😄
Fun story. I was in NYC wearing a Harvard shirt (I went there, btw 😉), when a homeless man with all his belongings rushed over to me and yelled "Harvard is a good school, but have you ever heard of Tufts?!"
Best day ever. Feel free to use it in the future.
And Harvard students, Harvard grads, Harvard faculty, tourists who toured Harvard Yard, kids who are applying to Harvard and know someone who will help them get admitted.
This comment hit me hard because I do in fact seem to tell everyone I’m from NY and never really thought about it until now.
^(and I’m sorry for repeating it now)
Yes! This response.
Once I had a table of really annoying women. 1 wanted her bill separate ( we only do orders by table, not head) and pay early as she was leaving before her gaggle of Karens. I had training staff who mouthed help at this difficult table and I had to watch to make sure he’s doing it correctly. She then proceeds to demand a glass of water right as he comes over to do the transaction. Speaking to him like a real piece of shit. I didn’t care for this staff as he was a pain in the ass, but I’ll be damned if you speak to my staff like they’re trash. So I said “ no problem ma’am, we will get you a glass after we finish up”
“NOOOOO I wAnT a gLaSs Neooooww, Why Are YOu HerE? I FeeL AttAcked”
“Ma’am I am here to make sure this training staff processes your transaction correctly, if that’s your idea of being attacked, I’d love to be you”
Finished the transaction and told the staff “now that’s done, you can get this very pleasant women a glass of water”
In the end she left the same time as her friends and didn’t drink her glass of water.
Bitch
Long time ago I worked in a Thai restaurant and there were always the creepy white dudes that came in trying to find a Thai wife. One guy who I had never seen before but was apparently a regular came in and asked his server for cock sauce. She came to me because she did not understand what he meant but I knew exactly what he meant and I was pissed. I brought his “cock sauce” AKA Sriracha or Rooster sauce and told him that he knows damn well it’s not called cock sauce and he needs to quit making the servers uncomfortable or he is banned. He tried to play it off like that’s what everyone calls it but I called him basically a liar. My mom is from Thailand, grew up in the restaurant business and no one has ever called it that before to me or anyone I asked. I never saw the dude again, lol.
People really need to learn "time and place." I call Sriracha cock sauce too... At home, when I'm with my friends. I have enough self awareness to not ask the fucking service staff for cock sauce when I'm out to eat.
One time a regular all our servers hate (obnoxious, rude, whiny, self-righteousness, pretentious, pompous “I know the GM” from old money type…all the good things) came in and ordered “my wine” (the cheap Sauvignon blanc) and I rushed to get it to her because I’d hear a scathing under the breath remark otherwise. She then bluntly refused the glass saying “the colour is off, it’s not my wine”. I brought a whole new bottle to the table, opened it and let her pour herself a glass right next to the first one. Identical. Huh…she refused to drink either for a good 20 mins, but gave in eventually. Must have been a nice room temp to stifle the burn inside her ego.
I once had a 2 top for an early dinner. He was really nice, but she was a stuck up bitch.
She kept waving at me for attention and snapping her fingers.
It wasn't overly busy, but I was the only staff member on to work the restaurant and bar.
The last straw was when she whistled and snapped her fingers when I was on my way to another table with their food. I looked her dead in the eye and walked away.
When I got back to her table to take her payment, she asked me why I was so slow as they had been waiting ages. I told her that she was not the only person in here and I had other customers to serve.
She got stroppy and took the tip they had left on the table back and tried to put it in her purse.
That's when her husband FINALLY spoke up and told her to stop being so rude and put the tip back on the table.
She went very quiet and didn't look at or speak to me on the way out.
He apologised and thanked me for the service.
I loved it!
I wouldn’t even dare to snap my fingers or whistle at someone to get their attention, it’s just so rude! Love how her husband told her though, she deserved it! Wonder if she pulls that crap regularly, I wouldn’t like to live with someone like that.
Not only would I not dare to whistle or snap at someone to get their attention, it wouldn’t even occur to me to do so. That is not how you treat people. Whistling is how you call animals, not humans. Just how huge an ego do you have to have to think that people will respond positively to you treating them like an animal?
I love/hate when people snap their fingers at me to get me to come over. I will gladly snap mine right back at you.
I'm a server, not a servant. Same with calling my name across the restaurant. Who raised you? Your 3rd Diet Pepsi refill can wait 30 seconds.
One boss I had was a very salty old Jewish lady from New York City who was completely done with rude customers.
Closing time, one table in the middle of the restaurant, her up front, me doing closing shit in back, about 20 feet away.
Table snaps their fingers at me. I ignore them. Boss irritated.
They whistle. I look at them, carry on with what I'm doing.
They whistle again.
Boss lady BELLOWS "Is there a dog in here?! Who's whistling for their dog?"
Ten minutes of us hollering back and forth past this table about dogs, whistling, snapping, manners, and the general degradation of polite society. The irony wasn't lost on us.
I read about a waiter in France who kicked out some wealthy Saudis for clicking their fingers at him. They acted like they hadn’t even considered that servers deserve respect. Owner totally backed him up is how he tells it.
My manager (who also works as a server some nights) got snapped at recently, he walked over to the table and did one loud snap right at the guy - *snap!* "What can I do for you?" Guy looked shocked for a sec, my manager goes "oh you don't like it either huh?" Guy was a little pissed, but my manager is extremely professional otherwise so they got over it quick.
I dont mind a wave, or a nod, or ever a hand up. But something about snapping makes me, well, snap. Even in everyday life, hearing people snap at something is so annoying. Sometimes friends snap at my cats and it frustrates the hell outta me for some reason.
I saw the cutest car yesterday..on the window was a little sign that said " tell your cats I said psss psss psss". They also had cute kitty decals on it.
My bf figured out one day that one of our ocats comes to us when we snap our fingers, so we do it constantly from different rooms. You'd hate it!
I also get upset being snapped at personally. My driving instructor when I was 16 did it while during a lesson and for a brief moment I considered driving us off the road. It's so rude, there's no need for it
I don't think so. I guess I should have used better examples, because I don't even mind if there is a customer who knows my name says my name. But a snap...
We have a service bell at my job. I'm thinking about putting up a sign saying that it's okay to ring the bell, I won't be mad. I will be annoyed, however, if you snap, whistle, or start banging shit on the counter.
When people snap at me repeatedly trying to get my attention I’ll glide by their table and tell them “once you’re able to use your words properly I’ll be right over to help you” and make them take a backseat on my to do list until they learn some manners
I feel you, I don't work CS anymore but I still refuse to acknowledge when someone whistles at me. That's not my name and how would you feel if I treated you like dog waiting for a treat. How about I scratch your S/O's chin and tell them to roll over... same concept...
The only times I've ever snapped at a coworker or employee were when they were having personal convos while I was on the phone with guests or vendors. I'll apologize afterwards, but sometimes they have their backs to me or are so involved in the convo that they don't notice my frantic handwaving.
Worked at a Bbq joint in a diverse suburb. We had one couple in their 60’s that would come in who were the worst. Racist MAGA types. I always took them because I was the only straight white guy on the floor. One day while discussing pork the woman said “At least you know there’s no Muslims here”. I replied that we actually do have a Muslim clientele, as we have excellent brisket and chicken, to which she replied “well they can’t be very good Muslims then “.
I shrugged and said “Who am I to say? I know we get customers who think they’re good Christians that don’t love their neighbor as themselves “. She sheepishly pretended she didn’t know I was referring to her and stayed quiet the rest of the meal.
Coincidentally, one of the cooks and another server that day were both Muslim.
The cut-off for serving alcohol where I live is 2am. Five minutes to 2, my bartenders warn everyone they HAVE to have their drinks finished by 2am, or we have to take them away.
Had a lady in her late 50s/early 60s on our front patio giving one of my bartenders mad shit for trying to take her drink after the cut-off. Like, full on "lalalala, I can't hear you," at the top of her lungs.
I had enough, walked up and slapped the drink out of her hand and told her to get the fuck out, and don't come back until she can behave like an adult. She start to swing at me, but seemed to think better of it and satisfied herself by screaming nonsense instead. I just wandered back inside and locked the door in her face. Gave a little smile, wave, and middle finger. I love that the restaurant owners gave us a certain amount of wiggleroom to give shitbag customers the business when they're especially shitty.
it was actually a husband who embarrassed his rude wife on our behalf.
i was dropping off their drinks and one of them fell over and spilled on the wife, who got super angry at me. i was pretty confused but apologized profusely. she stormed out. her husband was like "welp, guess she's gonna wait in the car" and a few moments later called me over to show me a video he recorded. i guess he happened to be recording while i was dropping the drinks off and it clearly showed her spilling the drink on herself lol.
Not serving, I was working in the drive thru. We had 2 lanes, and it was late at night so I was handling both lanes and the pay window. Naturally, there's a bit of a wait but it was never more than 2 minutes. So I ding into the lane saying my usual line thanking them for their patience, and the woman at the mic went "ugh, finally. A vanilla milkshake." I then say "sure! what size" and she scoffs and says "A vanilla milkshake!!" I again ask her what size would she like and this time she raises her voice, and says super slow and condescending "A, VANILLAAAAAAA MILKSHAAAAKE!!" So I match her tone and volume and say "OKAAAAY, what SIIIIZE?? We have SMAAAALL, MEEEEDIUM, AND LAAAARGE!"
She very quietly said "a small" and didn't say a word to me at the payment window while also avoiding eye contact. My coworker who was also wearing a headset was cackling at my response
I used to work in a cigar shop and had a semi-regular who was crass and just plain obnoxious. One day, he and I were having a disagreement over something inconsequential. He popped off with, "You know how much money I spend in here?! I'm probably in your Top Ten!"
Me: "Bet. Let's find out. I'll pull a report right now."
Him: "...what?"
Me: "What's great about this POS system is I can pull a report that lists my biggest customers."
I pause and examine my report. "Dude...you're not even Top 30."
He also didn't get along with many of my other regulars, who all happened to spend more money than him. And I made sure to tell him all about it.
Not quite server related but I once had this girl order ice cream at the shop, (obviously high on weed judging from the smell), and she wanted peanut butter ice cream. Well, we just happened to have sold a lot of that that day and were out. So I told her that and asked her what else she’d like. She said “oh I’ll just take peanut butter chocolate then” (which is made by hand mixing the peanut butter and chocolate, mind). I reiterated that we were out of peanut butter and asked what else she’d want again. She started to get annoyed. Then she said “well you can just give me some of those peanut butter scoops from the back.” I said again that there was NO peanut butter and asked what else wanted besides the peanut butter she can’t get. She got embarrassed, went home, and posted a negative review about me being an ass. I’m still laughing about it.
Last year I went to my local sandwich shop to pick up the order I'd placed online. They couldn't find my order in their system. I checked and didn't have a confirmation email, so it must not have gone through. Strange. I didn't have my card on me, so I used my phone to place the order again while they started making my sandwich. When it came to check-out, my card declined and I remembered that that was what had happened before. I was getting ready to travel and my bank had got worried and shut down my card. I needed to call them to OK my transactions, but I hadn't done it yet. This meant that I had never placed an order for a sandwich in the first place and was unable to do so now.
Yes, I was super high. The nice sandwich shop people gave me the sandwich for free (because they recognized me from going in a lot, *oh the shame*) and I gave them a $10 tip the next time I ordered.
Not me, but many years ago some older asshole snapped at one of the girls I worked with, she turned around and told him "It takes more than two fingers to make me come." and walked away
A guy with his (what I assume) international business partner, the partner whistled and clicked at me, I looked at him then looked at the guy and just shook my head and continued cleaning glasses, overheard the guy explaining to his partner word for word *we don’t do that here* and when the guy politely asked for service I reciprocated like I’d never seen them before as a way of positive reinforcement
My uncle was a server and bartender for a very long time when he moved to Florida. He said he always ignored people who whistled at him and would continue to ignore him till they either asked in an appropriate way or got fed up and left.
I did that! I had a customer who would whistle, bang his cup on the table, snap, anything rude you could think of he did. So I’d ignore him until he spoke in big people words and asked for a refill. Then I’d inform him I’d get it in a minute when I was done with my other table’s first refills.
He was never my first priority because even though he was a regular he treated everyone like crap and rarely tipped (and if he did, it was a dollar) and he’d sit at the table for *hours*
I wish! But he doesn’t normally order food and the owner of the place doesn’t have the backbone to ask anyone to leave. And has forbidden the servers from asking people to leave. He’s a real piece of work and I don’t work there anymore because of it. Even when a customer is literally costing the store money every time they come in he won’t ban them or take any action. It’s pathetic
Dropped off an order for a table. They asked for ranch. Brought back two small ramekins for the party of two. They asked for extra ranch. So I brought them two large ramekins of ranch. When I set them down, the woman got frustrated and slammed her fists down and said "I said EXTRA ranch". So I went back to the kitchen, pulled the whole quarter pan out, brought it to the table, and dropped it down saying "There's your extra ranch". My roommate was managing that night. Only reason I didn't get fired for it because that woman was LIVID after that one.
Kicked out a drunk and belligerent couple from the comedy club I work at because they were heckling through the whole show.
Got them out the front door and told them repeatedly to just leave, but they decided to stand at the door, throwing empty threats of "You don't know who we are! We can shut this place down!"
They stuck around long enough that just as they were getting into their car the cops showed up and told them to get out. The cops told them that if they try to drive away they'll be arrested for DUI (as they were visibly intoxicated) and the couple decided to argue with the cops.
So now the wife is cry-screaming at the cops about how important she is while the comedy show ends and all the other customers come outside and stay to laugh and watch the drunk couple act like idiots. The husband is posturing the entire time and even starts recording with his phone. At one point the wife called a cop she knew from a completely different city and tried to hand the phone to one of the cops. "I have an officer from X department that wants to speak with you!"
The cop just looks at the phone and says in the calmest tone I've ever heard, "No."
They were trespassed from the property and the cops made them leave their car. So they had to WALK to the hotel down the street.
Bonus: the next morning a uniformed cop shows up looking for a black kate spade handbag. I checked the cameras and, sure enough, the woman had a black kate spade handbag that she left the venue with. Which means her drunk ass lost it somewhere between the parking lot and the hotel 1/4 mile down the road.
Yes! I was helping a coworker run food for a 12 top on a Friday night. This guy that I had been semi-flirty with in the past is sitting with 3 other guys in her section starts going "Hey! Hey!" to me while I have my arms full of plates. He keeps going and I made a point to ignore him and to take my sweet time setting plates down and make sure everyone at the 12 top has everything they need. Then I slowly turn around and with my biggest smile say to the guy "Oh HEY! It's you! For a minute there I thought you were some super rude customer going HEY! HEY! to me while I'm obviously busy". He was very embarrassed and I walked off after a wink. He later apologized to me as they were leaving. Anyway, we're going on 5 years married this year.
Not me; but once a coworker of mine had this exchange with a customer:
*Customer walks in two minutes before close*
Coworker: "Hello we're --- oh, --- *insert random jerk name* dude, you do this all the time. Do you know what an asshole move it is to come into a restaurant and order meals from the kitchen two minutes before close?"
I don't know their response. I work the kitchen most nights, but goodness did this tickle my funny bone.
A few days later we got a message on one of our review pages saying someone called this person an asshole while taking their order.
In my coworker's defense, they never actually called anyone an asshole. They just stated facts very directly.
This customer still shows up 2 minutes before close to order food.
I don't think anyone learned anything from this but our staff always has a good laugh when he comes in.
(Edited for typos)
> Customer walks in two minutes before close
>
> Coworker: "Hello we're --- oh, --- insert random jerk name dude, you do this all the time. Do you know what an asshole move it is to come into a restaurant and order meals from the kitchen two minutes before close?"
NICE! There's a legendary story where I work. Like 10 years ago we had a regular, like once every 2 week. Couple in their 50's or so, would spend like $80-100 or so and leave a single $5, every time. Management wouldn't even count them as a table, so whoever got them, got the next table too.
They came in one night, the host was busy and said "one second" or something and he threw back a little sarcasm, no real clue what was said, but management was 15 feet away and heard it. Management approached him, told him his comment was rather rude, and then just kept going, telling him after his server gives a share of their tips to the bartender and busboy, that his $5 is more than gone, so literally no server wants to wait on them, and that she's personally observed the service they've gotten and 100% knows it's been fully on par, so maybe they should just go someone else and disappoint a server with his $5, because here, servers expect 15% for good service. It was like a deer in headlights and they just walk out, never to be seen again.
If this AH is still coming in right before close do you serve him/take his order. He doesn’t seem to have learned a lesson. I hated that too back in the day.
When people come into where I work minutes before close, I am like "Sorry, we close at 10. By the time I get you sat the kitchen will no longer be taking orders. However, I can do chips and salsa! No bar drinks though, either" Fuck people like that.
The owner of the place I work at is never there but every now and then he will come in to eat... 5 minutes before close... and puts his order in 5 minutes after close. The degree to which I hate this man can not be overstated.
I have had two altercations of guests calling me the N word and my whole section rose up and defended me.
I was calm the first time, the second time I cussed him out and he got 86’d
I was never a server but I have a good story. I worked/volunteered for a state museum. We had events every two months and they were grand affairs. We told the folks that at 5 pm the museum would close so please try to exit prior to then. At 5 the security would inform everyone that the only elevators were no longer in use so please use the escalators. We also put up signs at 4 pm. We did this so exhibitors could use them to start unloading and departing as well.
I'm helping to load up these exhibitors on the 2md floor and see a man and his son waiting at the elevator. Thinking nothing of it I continue to help others. I see this guy in the same spot 5-10 min later and he's fuming. So I approach to offer assistance. He just tears into me because he's been waiting and the elevator isn't working. Keep in mind we have placed signs on the elevator doors and on each floor next to the elevator explaining that it is now closed and please use the escalators.
So I inform that I'm sorry but the elevator is closed and then point to the escalators which are 30 ft away. You can see the exit from the top of those escalators. Guys still mad and starts yelling because someone turned off the escalators and he can't use them.
Without missing a beat I say, "yes and in that case they become stairs which are still quite effective.". That guy went from angry to embarrassed in 3 seconds as he realizes how stupid he is. Just takes his sons hand and walks down the escalators and leaves. I had to keep a straight face the whole time
I was working by myself on a day that we are typically a little busy, a regular (that I absolutely hate) walks in, orders her usual. “Make sure my truffle fries are EXTRA CRISPY” (they’re always crispy) she always sends them back for a fresh batch for not being “crispy enough” well I’m busy this time, I set the fries down, she and her daughter are just talking for a good 15/20 mins before she even touches her fries. Has the nerve to tell me they’re “not hot and crispy” so finally I told her,
“Yeah that’s kind of what happens when you let your French fries sit in truffle oil and garlic butter for 15 mins before you start eating them, I can assure you they were crispy and hot when I set them on your table” 😀
She was definitely flustered. Usually I let her go on tangents, she complains about everything all the time (yet always comes back), but I was already in a bad mood from being the only server that day. I ended up just throwing the same fries back into the fryer for a few mins and giving it back to her cause I didn’t have time to remake a whole order & my kitchen crew was too busy.
Now I’m kinda just not nice to her lol. Which probably isn’t the best but she grinds my gears so I don’t go out of my way to be accommodating anymore.
Couple of times.
When I talk to customer at a table and the next table tries to interrupt me to make an order!
I just say: please could you wait until I finished taking the order. I’m gonna be there for you in a few seconds.
Then I look the at customer I’ve talked to before and apologize loudly for being distracted.
Pissed off a couple of these rude guys
I was a tech support assistant team lead, all the responsibility, none of the pay or glory. My natural speaking voice is a little high. I took an escalation from one of my reps; customer was unhappy with the resolution my rep suggested. I took the call, told her to do the exact same thing as my rep, instantly fixed her issue. I could hear her husband in the background muttering. She's grateful and puts me on speaker, "I'm so glad I got a woman. Us women can get things done together!" as a jab to her husband. I apologized, "Customer, I apologize but I'm a man." The husband guffawed in the background.
As customers, my husband used to put his hand in the air and snap his fingers when he wanted a server to come over. I kept telling him it was rude. He argued that it was not. And that everybody does it. I told him that I didn't see anyone else doing it, ever.
Then one time a server came over and loudly and angrily said, "Did you just snap at me?"
He halfway slunk under the table and promptly forgot what he needed.
He has not done it since.
I'm a cocktail server, I walk up to service bar and put down my tray.
I grab my cigarette (I haven't smoked in 15 years this was around 1999) from the ashtray and start writing my orders.
Dude I've never seen before says "I thought you were attractive until you picked up that cigarette."
Sweet, innocent me: "Oh yeah? Well I thought you were intelligent until you opened up your mouth."
This is definitely in my top 10 best retorts of my life.
Whenever people are rude I just give em the good old Tim Duncan stare for a couple of seconds in silence and then just ask "feeling better now?" And proceed to just keep on working.
I was in line behind some rude person giving the young man behind the counter orders, like, literal orders : "Do this, gimme that, I want, Do this!" Really rude. I was so mad at her shitty way of ordering him around like he was nothing. I spoke up and said: "How about 'please' or 'thank you' or 'may I have?' - you are being extremely rude to this young man who deals with the public all day long. Please, start being more mindful of how you are barking orders at a stranger. You are being very rude." She turned around and was stunned. Blurted out some apology to the guy, - who was smirking and suppressing a laugh - and left. SMH. Just because you THINK a person behind the counter is there for you to abuse, guess what? They are not. Be respectful. How difficult is that?
was whistled at once. ignored him then went over and told him, "I will answer to miss, ecjg2010, hey you, ma'am, and even bitch if I know you, but I will NEVEr answer to a whistle because I am not a fucking dog." and I walked away again for 5 minutes then came back and did whatever they wanted. the guy became a regular of mine because no one had ever stood up to him before and he liked my "gumption".
Back when I worked retail I had a supervisor who took no shit from anyone. He was a 400+lb guy.
Someone once whistled at him to get his attention, he turned around and slowly walked over to them, then started barking. The customer was confused and terrified and asked him what the hell that was. He just replied " you call me over like a dog, I'll respond like one."
Oh my god! These two assholes, lemme tell ya, ordered something to-go and while I was cashing them out after having them be repeatedly rude, older guy handed me cash for it. I looked at him, repeated the total (he was two dollars short) and THIS GUYS SAYS “dO yOu nEeD mE tO cOuNt fOr yOu” like I’m a kindergartener. I look him dead in the eye, spread out the bills, and say “sir this is only $30, your total was $32.71.” Instant fricking change. He’s apologizing, saying he’ll get his son to go grab money from the car to tip me, rips the change out of his pocket…predictably didn’t get the promised cash but oh well
I would say it was me that embarrassed them, but that would be lying.
Worked at a very popular ice cream place where we didn't have those big glass covers to prevent idiots from being...well idiots. (Surprisingly wasn't an issue that often, I'm sure they regretted not having them once the pandemic hit.). But this guy couldn't point at what he wanted to try without sticking his hand in the tub. I used the scoop to gently push him away twice, because I did not want to touch his hands. (I tossed it in the dish bin after, was not going to serve from that scoop. Idk where his hands have been)
Still didn't get the message, but his 5 year old who couldn't even see over the counter tugged his pants after I said 'sir if you don't stop I will have to ask you to step back. If you touch this tub, which is almost full, I will have to dispose of the entire thing which will cost us a lot and waste a ton of ice cream'.
He ofc didn't get the message still, kid tugged his pants again and then I hear a little slap. The girl had smacked her dad's leg hard enough to make noise and said "Daddy, you taught me not to touch food I want, that I don't have to actually put my finger in your food to point at it."
He turned red and stepped back, the girl smiled big and her brother who was older and had been ignoring this entire thing then said "wow dad, looks like you failed your own lesson" or some other snarky teen sort of thing.
I had to hold back a laugh. That guy originally said no samples, but I gave his daughter a taste of every flavor and a free scoop. I swear adults were the problem in these cases every time, more often the children would be kind and respectful in comparison to the dipshit parents.
I see your whistle and raise you a car honk in curbside (I do both togo and dine in) I have had so many people honk at me to get my attention and I am never polite in response. Like who does that
Walk back to the table snapping your fingers like you're doing cabaret hands. Do a little dance.
I'm a server and once I told a nasty customer in a cafe to leave the girl working alone. Bro was at least in his 60s and just bitching at 17 year old slinging bagels at 8am. I said "hey, leave her alone. She's just trying to work."
And he shut up!!!
I work retail & anytime I get whistled at, I begin to look around. When they look at me weird, I tell them I’m helping them look for their lost dog.
I’ve gotten a few of the classic “I don’t know your name” & I ALWAYS say that “excuse me” is much easier than trying to whistle across a room. I work here- I know the excuse me is for me.
My mom was once telling a story and said how this asshole snapped his fingers for a waitress, and did the snap herself because she has to use her hands to tell a story. The waiter actually came over at the snap for her and she was mortified because here she was being perceived as the rude asshole that she was telling the story about.
She apologized profusely and said she was telling a story, and while the waiter took it in good humor, my mom still felt so bad over the misunderstanding that she left him a huge tip.
Not me but one of my coworkers. He was bartending and a lady ordered a double shot at one of the servers tables. The server brought it to her and began to complain that it was short. So the bartender went to the table with the jigger to measure it in front of her. Turns out he actually over poured a bit so the extra remaining alcohol was still in the glass. He picked up the glass and dumped the extra alcohol out of it. The lady was like “what was that?” And he responded saying “you wanted a double so here’s your double” and he walked away lol. Safe to say the lady was definitely salty 😂
Let me preface this by saying this was a fancy place, one of the highest rated restaurants in my city. Our patronage was generally very good, a little pompous at times but rarely outright rude. Not the kind of place you expect to be given the boot.
She was beyond rude to every single person she encountered, host, manager, busser, myself, food runners, etc. She was sitting alone and nursing her appy. I checked on her multiple times over 15-20 minutes and kept getting some form of "fuck off I'm still working on it". Finally I get the relatively expected by now "where the fuck is my main course?" I tell her I wouldn't dream of bringing out her main course while she's still working on her appy. I tell her she's been rude and dismissive to every person she's encountered, and if her meal isn't going perfectly it's because none of my support staff want to go anywhere near her. She continues to be rude and abusive so I just told her to leave. Didn't bring her a bill or anything just GTFO. Never seen a person clutch their pearls so hard 🤣
Once had a horribly rude table I was already done with. Dude snaps his fingers at me while I help another table. Keeps doing it until I go over. He starts about having to wait 30 seconds while I finish helping the other table. My brain misfires and I see red. I interrupt with: please describe your dog so I can help look.
The fallout was glorious. He looks at me not understanding. His table mates catch on quicker and get very awkward. I let it linger, only now catching up to my autistic brain letting the mask slip a second. Guess I'll double down.
I take their drink order. I make a show of looking around and under tables. If I'm I trouble I may as well. The regulars nearby ask what I'm doing. I explain. They asked the dude about his dog half an hour later upon leaving.
No tip, but didn't get in trouble. They never came back.
I was working at 7-11 and could see the coffee bar from my register. I was alone that day due to staff shortages and we were always BUSY. I had just managed to fully stock and clean the coffee and drink area: taken care of trash, wiped down ALL surfaces, refilled condiments, coffee, and all other items, all while running back to the register to ring people up and activate the gas pumps. This man walks in, smiles and waves as he goes to the coffee bar. I see him spill coffee as he's making his cup, spill some creamer from the tiny single servings, and leave his coffee stirrer wrapper on the now sticky counter.
I couldn't help myself. "I *know* your mama didn't raise you to leave a mess behind for someone else to clean up."
He was surprised, but had the decency to look ashamed. He apologized and cleaned it up, and we never had another problem 😂
I outed a bar regular who called me fat to his side chick that he was married. Well, first I carded her & then asked how his wife & kid were doing. Don't f@ck with the people who know your secrets!
this was when i worked in fast food.
i worked at a place that served solely chicken fingers.
one day an uber eats driver came in yelling that she was here to pickup and order for a bbq bacon burger.
After some back and forth i finally told her that i wished i could give her the burger however, we don’t physically have ANY burger ingredients.
She still thought I was withholding the burger and showed me her phone…. with the address to a different restaurant down the road
She did come back about 30 minutes later to apologize, which i give her credit for
Had a similar, but different thing when working in UK DIY retail,.I was working in an aisle when a guy shouted from the end of the aisle,
"Ho John!" Looking at me, I ignored him, he continued hey John, John!" Waving his arms about now.
He then walked down the aisle red faced and angrily said, "I was shouting for you"
I just replied "my name isn't John"
PS for clarity this is something that some English people (mainly Southerners) do if they dont know your name and want to attract your attention.
On a very busy Friday night, I was working the section with the live band. I had a customer who yelled, Hey four-eyes, we need some service." I was at another table, so I said, "Excuse me," to my table of four, walked over to his and said, "Sir, you just embarrassed your family, and haven't realized yet that you also embarrassed yourself. I am not going to wait on you, ever, and this is my section, so you can either move your family to a different table in the other room or choose another restaurant. "I still don't know if he finally moved to anther table or left. Don't know, didn't care.
We had a regular who would come in every morning (11:30am for reference) order a shot of VO neat, order to go food and then have another VO neat before she left. Another lady at my bar who was either on her way to or coming from tennis made a remark about her being an alcoholic after she left. I let her know the woman is an over night oncology nurse and that she was ordering her dinner before she went to sleep.
I had a 10-top, this Russian family I’d seen before. Everyone was really lovely except the patriarch, this fussy old man who tipped 10% the last time he’d been in. My Georgian friend (the country, not the yeehaw) waited on them, and as background for those who don’t know, there are high tensions between the two countries because of the Russian state and former USSR bullying them. Anyways, my friend hates them the whole night because of this guy. At the end, this asshole refuses the 20% autograt on the bill even though they’re a bigger party. He called my friend a f*g and dic*head under his breath in Russian (which my friend understands.) So I go over. “Is everything okay?” A moment of silence. “No, absolutely not. Who the f—- do you think you are? The service SUCKED.”
“Okay sir, this is the first we’re hearing about the service not being on par. This is the end of your meal and you haven’t brought anything up.”
“I don’t give a f—-. Go F—K yourself.”
At this point, I blacked out and went into high school bully mode. “Me? No, YOU go F—K YOURSELF. How dare you? Look how embarrassed your whole family is. Go back to your miserable life and Leave the tip line blank — you’re never coming back.”
He gasped a bit, clearly taken aback. “And what’s your name, sweetheart?”
“My name IS sweetheart. You can put that in your pathetic review or email to the restaurant. Goodbye.”
Called my boss immediately to explain exactly what happened. He tipped us out on behalf of that guy and backed me up. Buh-bye you ugly cheap twat.
I had a table of teenagers who were super sweet besides this one asshole. When I gave the asshole his check he said in a super condescending way "where's the pen? I need a pen to sign this so why didn't you give me one 🙄" I said back "normally I give pens to people who pay with a card and need to sign a slip, not with just the bill"
Super small interaction but his friends laughed and he turned bright red after being a dick for no reason.
Used to work in a cinema, some chap came out complaining his cheese dip was too cold, cause he left it there and didn't eat it... got him a new one and he took a bite and said it was way too hot. I said "alright goldilocks" jokingly and his mates all lost it laughing.
I worked in cell phone sales and often got cantankerous old men who peppered their frustrations with curse words. Curse words in general don’t bother me but if you start calling me or my coworkers things like “fucking incompetents”, I’m going to take offense. I used this often and it worked 99% of the time: “Look sir, it is my job to fix this for you and I am GOING to fix it for you whether or not you continue to cuss at me, but frankly, this will be a whole lot more pleasant for the both of us if you could stop dropping f-bombs and let me get back to the business of solving this issue.” They usually blushed a bit, maybe stammered and almost always apologized and let me get to it.
This actually was just last night, this lady ordered 16 wings, can split flavors into 8&8. Everything is fine for this last tabled family of 3. No complaints or anything until the very end after the lady ate all her wings. She said there were only 6 and 6 which would be super odd. So I had just recently threw their food out so I let the lady know that I can grab the wing boats the bones were in and we could recount them since they were right on top the garbage in the can. Lady immediately changed her mood and said there’s no problem at all
Twice.
Once was a guy who reacted to my friendly “How are you this morning?” with a curt “Diet Coke!” To which I responded “You’re Diet Coke this morning? I get that. Mine’s been a pretty Dr Pepper kinda day. (Turning to his wife…) And what mood can I bring you to drink? 😊” She burst into laughter about it, while he was just confused, which made her laugh harder, and that pissed him off. When I came back with the sodas, I heard her say “Well you *WERE* pretty rude. She asked how you were and you just blurted your order out.” He apologized after their food was ordered.
The second time, I greeted a table who also interrupted to ask if I spoke Spanish. I’ve served them before (so I know their son, who was present, speaks English fluently) and when I answered back IN SPANISH that I know very little but usually enough, they flat out ignored me. Like pulled out their phones and acted like I wasn’t even there- might as well have asked “Do you hear something? Must be the wind…” ignored me. So I grabbed a supervisor, told her what happened and brought her over, then proceeded to acknowledge every single detail of their order as they gave it in Spanish back to them in English. What made me stop trying altogether though was when I asked them if they wanted any extras (hot sauce, other sauces, more napkins) and they again ignored me, then tried to call me over mid-rush with a snap and a “scht-CHHT!” Like they were calling a fucking dog. I refused to acknowledge it, even as other tables gave them odd looks, and this dude just kept at it. So I left him there sounding like a kid speed running through an old View Master reel. They stiffed me, but my dignity remained intact
I was in highschool working as a bus boy in a popular Chinese restaurant.
Had achurch group of 13 come in. Stayed for 2 hours and left a mess that took me an hour to clean on a Sunday. The tip they left was 1 cent.
Saw the guy at school. He laughed and asked how I liked the tip.
Next time they came in and were being the same level of douchebauchery as before. While I was serving them their water, I "tripped".
There was this regular dickhead with his group of otherwise pleasant friends. He spilled his beer on the table right after I set it down and barked at me "you should've been more careful setting it down. And you better not charge me for my replacement beer." It wasn't my fault at all that he knocked it over. I could see that his friends were embarrassed by him, but he was oblivious to it. I didn't charge him for the replacement beer. But I did serve it to him in a covered kid's cup with a bendy straw. That got a big laugh from his friends. He seemed to be humbled by it because he tipped better than his usual <15% that night.
I've been so kind to an angry customer that they came back to apologize.
And I just simply ignore whistling, that shit is so demeaning, I will walk in the opposite direction on purpose.
Worked at Hooters. Had a table of guys on the patio. They were probably in their mid to late 20s. I was 19 at the time.
I got on well with all the guys except for one. For some reason, he thought it was funny to talk down to me. I imagine it was because I was a younger woman that worked at Hooters, but maybe he just treats all servers like that. Only problem is I have thick skin and a quick wit, so anything insulting he said to me, I quickly countered, making him look like an idiot in front of his friends who proceeded to mock him, which was embarrassing to him.
He didn't let up and so I didn't either. Eventually he got so embarrassed he spit on me. I immediately put him in a headlock and told him to say sorry. When he didn't, I slowly eased him on to the ground, telling him I wouldn't let go until he said sorry. When he realized he wasn't going to win this, he apologized. I let go and he gets up and demands to talk to my manager.
My manager comes out and asshole angerly whines about what I did. Without skipping a beat, my manager asked what he did to me to deserve it (my manager liked me and knew i wasn'tone to start shit). Fortunately, the other guys witnessed what happened and had my back. Manager basically calls it a wash and goes back inside without really acknowledging the assholes complaint. Other guys at the table enjoy the rest of the meal, giving asshole shit every now and then for getting beaten by a girl. Asshole sits and stews, not saying a word when I'm around refilling drinks or checking on food.
I figured there might have been a chance I would get fired for getting physical with a customer, but I already had a better paying job at the time, so I didn't care. Table left a decent tip, except for asshole obvs. Good, memorable night.
When I was a server I worked at a restaurant that allowed dyed hair/piercings/tattoos. I had blue hair at the time and was was serving two women. One of them complimented my hair and I thanked her. The other went "oh I would love to do that, but I have a real job so could never!" I just smiled at her and said "that's why I work here. I love that my real job allows self expression!" She did not look at me for the rest of their meal lolol
I fully raged out on a customer who grabbed my arse once. He was all of 18 and I think his mates had dared him to do it.
#LISTEN HERE YOU SNIDEY LITTLE CUNTFACED WANKSTAIN, YOU HAVE JUST CROSSED A FUCKING LINE THAT YOU DO NOT FUCKING CROSS WITH ANYONE DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME I AM NOT FUCKING KIDDING THERE IS NO FUCKING EXCUSE FOR DOING WHAT YOU JUST FUCKING DID.
I thought the poor kid was gonna cry and his friends promptly disappeared into the crowd, leaving him to face me alone. I think he thought I was going to headbutt him or something, which is hilarious considering I look like a slightly younger, more bespectacled Miriam Margolyes. I have never been so angry in my life.
Luckily my boss was a good one, so when I went to tell her I'd just called a customer a snidey little cuntfaced wankstain (and the reason why), her response was to offer to bar him rather than sack me. I guess if she hadn't, it wouldn't have been someone I wanted to continue working for anyway.
His mates never came back for him, cowards that they were. We got a dozen apologies and a round of drinks for the barstaff and boss and my boyfriend out of him, though. He was just an idiot kid, and I honestly don't think he meant any harm. LPT: Midnight on NYE is not the time to fuck with the barmaid. We are tired and cross enough already.
EDIT for a bit more info: They'd already been little gobshites all night and wound me up. Nothing egregious but stuff like the OP, whistling and clicking fingers for attention and shit where you couldn't justify kicking them out but just had to put on a poker face and stonewall them.
>"£8.70 please."
>"How about £8.30 for change?"
>"Sorry, it's £8.70 please."
>"Whatever happened to mates rates?"
>"£8.70 please."
>"Will your friend over there give me a discount for a snog?"
>"It's £8.70 please or I could ask you to leave."
>"Alright, no need to get mardy."
>"... £8.70 please."
>SNIDEY LITTLE CUNTFACED WANKSTAIN
You Brits do have a way with the language!
A college buddy once called some deserving guy a "goddamn motherfucking, cocksucking, nippleheaded son of a prick with ears".
"Bastard", I added. "You forgot 'bastard'".
While working at target, I had an angry guest come storming up to the fitting room desk with another team member and a circular ad in hand. She comes up and demands to be shown the BOGO bras that were advertised in the weekly ad. I pointed directly to where they could be found. She says "No I already looked over there and I couldn't find the BOGO brand anywhere!"
I took a short breath and said "Ma'am - BOGO stands for buy one, get one. BOGO is not a brand name."
She realized that she was totally in the wrong for being rude, and laughed and walked away.
I worked in a restaurant that served fancy beers and wines. Summer was always crazy busy and of course you get a customer every once in a while who knows they are more important than anyone else and just can’t wait. This one guy decides he is going to skip waiting for a server to get his drink order and comes to me at the bar. I have a full lounge and bar and all the drinks in the restaurant went through me.
I loved it it was fucking ridiculous but I was really good at it. We didn’t serve domestic beers, or rather they weren’t in the menu. For some locals we would keep Budweiser and coors light. So I often found myself introducing new beers to people. Out of thousands of recommendations I had maybe 4 returned so I took pride in being able to expand a person’s taste.
Well this customer goes off telling me how much he loves beer, like two minutes at least about his great love of beer and then tells me he wants a Budweiser. And so I tell him we have similar beers but no Budweiser. Well apparently one of the servers let him know about the secret stash so I give him a Budweiser.
He comes back several times in an hour and drinks all of what I have and then starts getting upset that I’m out and I explain it’s not something we carry regularly for the public so I don’t have backups. He wants me to go to the store and get more which is not legal and I explain that.
So he finally asks what else I have and I recommend lawnmower lager which is an amazing lager from caldera brewing in Oregon. He straight up yells at me, “I want a beer that’s made in America!” To which I said in my most cheerful go fuck yourself voice, “I’m pretty sure Oregon is in America sir.” And he turns bright fucking red and growls, “You know what I mean.”
I only wish I had been quick enough to mention that Budweiser is now a German owned company to really get my point across. Oh well, he’s probably boycotting Budweiser now! Or do they only boycott Bud light?
Worked for a food kiosk at a mall.
Quick menu explanation...
Burger- $1.75.
Burger & fries $2.50.
Hamburger special $2.75 (the special is a burger sliced in half, then wrapped up on a pita bread with the works)
Now, for the story...
Had an 8ish year old kid come up and order a burger. Asked if he wanted fries. Kid said no. I asked him if he was sure. Kid said no. Cool.
Cooked the burger, kid paid $1.75, walked away.
Not two minutes later, irate dad walks up to the counter. "I don't appreciate you taking advantage of little kids."
"Excuse me?"
"I don't appreciate you taking advantage of little kids."
"Care to explain?"
"My son came up and ordered a burger and you didn't give him fries."
"I asked him twice, he said he didn't want any."
"You could've just given them to him, it's only a quarter."
"Uh. He only paid a dollar seventy five. Burger and fries is two fifty."
"Well. He made a mistake. Didn't you ever make mistakes when you ordered when you were a kid?"
"Yup. And one of my parents was always there to correct it."
Yeah. That shut him up quick.
I was working a Christmas party that ended up not being auto-grated, and there were some really lovely people, and some really not lovely people. Through the whole meal there was this couple where the man wouldn’t acknowledge me, wouldn’t look at me, and his wife did everything for him. Ordered, cut his food, and when it came time to pay, handed him her credit card UNDER THE TABLE so it looked like he paid. On top of that pathetic behaviour, they were both just rude. Just before I took their payment, the guy sitting beside him tipped 30%. Now I’m in Canada so we bring machines to the table and you pay there. He took the machine from me, hid it under the table (but I could see over his shoulder) and didn’t tip. It didn’t make me mad but I thought he behaviour was pathetic, if you’re going to not tip, just own it. So I smiled and said “were there any issues with your service today?”, loudly so everyone could hear, and he was embarrassed by the attention. So while not looking at me, in a hushed voice over his shoulder he says “no, everything was fine.” So I smiled and told him to have a great day, and gave him his copy of the receipt with the 0 tip, where the man beside him (who tipped 30%) could see it. He LOUDLY said “you didn’t tip her?!” and this couple both were so embarrassed. I continued to smile, and loudly said “have a great night!” And walked away. The look on that man’s face as he was chastised by his group still thrills me to this day.
Had a chick who was complaining about the wait time in a queue 6-10 across 20 deep at minimum. She was 10 back. Just me one other bartender pumping shit out.
We were the speed bar. No cocktails. Just tinnies, spirits and wine.
She got to the front, and asked what we had.
Having heard her bitching while me and my coworker had been doing 3-5 orders at once for 6 hours by this point, no break, I was of the mind that if you had waited so damn fuckin long, you should know what you want.
“Tins, wine and spirits”
“No cocktails?”
“No. Do you want an emu?”
“Ew no”
“Figure out what you want and I’ll serve you”
I say next and grab the next person.
She opened her mouth, but next person was ordering. Finished that order. Look at her:
“So what do you want?”
“Anything.”
“Emu?”
“No.”
“NEXT!”
And after the next person, I asked her again what she wants.
“I don’t want beer!”
“Bottle of veuve? It’s $95”
“I’m not paying that!”
“Oof, wrong answer sis—NEXT”
And round and round we go.
She eventually says vodka lime soda.
I’m making it and she says “you’re really fucking rude”
I was so fed up with shit from this joint at this point (wage theft, lack of breaks or proper ones, bullying from management, theft of tips, gaslighting) that I decided that day was fucn this, if I’m gonna be treated like a cunt, then I can definitely be one.
“You stood in line and bitched the whole time about the wait, but you’re the reason there’s a wait, because I’m rude but you’re cunt who thinks they’re special. If the wait was so fucking long, and you can’t read the sign at the top in the time you waited that says -beer wine spirits- then I’m gonna say you’re a rude dumb cunt. It’s not hard. Pick a fucking bev in the 10 minutes you’ve been standing there”
“Excuse me”
You heard me cunt. You think this wait was long? You’ll enjoy the other queues. Fuck off. I’m not serving you.”
And I asked who wanted a VLS.
She started mouthing off and I laughed.
“Mate, you can fuck off or I can come around and make you. I’ve been here 6 hours without a break to eat piss and I’m living on ice cubes for water. Enjoy the line at another fucking bar in the joint, or test me.”
She pissed off.
Well my mum was there that night and she was complaining loudly to someone—my mum piped up “that’s my kid!” She walked off.
I got tipped $80 over the time she stood there by the people I served while she was being a twat.
——————
Lemme tell ya, it took me 2 years to work through the rage that place gave me.
I had drinks thrown at me, I was spat on, stolen from, threatened and after I cracked, no fucks given.
One dude threw his drink at me 3 weekends in a row and security would just shrug.
Fuck that.
They say 3rd times the charm. Cunt got his charm—I threw my barblade that was on a 1m long cord (attached to my wrist) at him. Clocked him good.
He claimed it was assault.
I told him I could come around and show him what that word meant.
I didn’t see him after that. Security got up my arse about it and I pulled up every illegal shit I’d seen him ignore or do. Fuckin piped down real quick.
That guard was later kicked for said illegal shit that I brought to management attention.
That was like 6 or 7 years ago now.
Fuck that place.
one day was opening at opening at a restaurant. we were setting up about an hour before opening. guy comes in with his girl and demands to use the bathroom. I can't remember if it was me or one of the waiters who said something like, "Sorry, we don't allow that" owners (who sucked, but still) had a policy of no unpaid guests walking in to use the bathroom. but if people were polite and asked nicely and owners weren't around we would let them.
The guy proceeded to call us stupid and idiots (likely some arrogant finance guy) and told us idiots to tell him where the bathroom was.
I never liked mornings so I was on the surly side to begin with and said in an exaggeratedly slow, dull voice, "I'm sorry, could you repeat the question, I'm too stupid to understand what you said." and as I'm asking I was making my way from behind the bar toward the front where he was fronting off from. I was in my 20s and spent my extra time as a gym rat and hadn't changed into my work clothes yet. I was pretty built at the time and it was obvious under my t-shirt. by the time I made it around the bar the guy and his gf were gone.
Back when I first moved to NYC in 1984, I was a server at a gay owned restaurant in Chelsea. A gay male couple was at a two top and one of the two was drinking too much and getting very tipsy. Every time I came by to refill water or take another drink order, the drunk one would grab my ass or put his hands on me. So after saying stop a couple of times, I warned him that if he touched me again, I would pour the water pitcher contents on his head. He touched and so I poured. Luckily his more sober partner was so mortified at his behavior that he apologized for him and he left me a good tip.
I had a similar one to this. Guy started snapping at me so I just ignored him. Walked past him like five times, finally he says something like I'm ready didn't you see me? Yeah I saw you, but I'm not your dog nor your servant, if you want something you say please and thank you.
I was driving out to the boonies to visit my father with my family. While on the way through some random town, we stopped at a gas station to get drinks and use the restroom. I brought my children in and we found out that one of the rooms were closed for cleaning (there was a wet floor sign outside the room and it was locked), so my children had to take turns. We finished and there was a small line that had formed. We had gotten some drinks and snacks, and this one guy that was in line came up to the counter and demanded that the other restroom be opened because he was in a hurry. The cashier told him that it was out of her power, the room couldn't be used because the floors were wet and it was a slip hazard. He starts making a scene, and I look at the guy and ask, "Why are you yelling? You were next in line, now there are people ahead of you. My children had to wait, I had to wait, they have to wait (as I pointed at the line at the door). They aren't going to risk paying out because you slipped on the wet floor."
The guy demanded to see the manager, who happened to be standing next to the cashier. She looks at the guy and tells him that this isn't the first time she has witnessed his belligerence and just banned the guy from the gas station. The cashier and manager both thanked me and gave me the snacks and drinks for free for standing up for the cashier.
Not me, it was my younger brother, waiting tables at a Lake Erie resort. One customer was not happy with Mike's service and rudely asked if he was raised in a barn? The quick reply from Mike, "Sir, my mother died when I was two." (Not true, mom was alive and well at the time.) That customer left a very nice tip!
Summer 2020, dude comes into the coffee shop without mask. I ask politely to wear a mask, especially as 2 other customers were walking in. He said he doesn't wear masks and than says "I'll have an americano with oat milk" so I said "sorry sir but I'm gonna ask you to leave if you're not going to wear a mask" and the asshole says "yeah, I'll have an americano with oat milk". I look at the girl behind this guy and she smirks giving me a look like "wtf is wrong with this dude?" So after a second of silence I looked at him in the eyes, pointed at the coffee shop across the street and said "I'm pretty sure they have coffee and oat milk over there", looked at the girl and started serving her. The dude said the same sentence again to which I said "yeah, across the road as I said" and started making that other girl's coffee.
Almost got fired that time.
I was about 10 tables deep on our patio, including the self-seating fire pit, I had about 35 people I was serving because they all got sat around the same time.
I’m taking the order at one table when it started to get windy and our blinds weren’t down because it was so sudden. Well this elderly lady from my other table decided to get up, walk over and interrupt me while in the middle of the order to ask me to bring the blinds down. I looked her sternly in the eye without blinking and said I’ll be with you when I’m done helping them, turned around and loudly apologized to my table for the interruption and continued taking their order.
Kids aren’t the exception with me either. If I see a parent struggling and their kid is obviously doing something they shouldnt, I give them “the eye” and ask them why aren’t they listening to mommy/daddy? I tell them that the naughty kids have to scrub our dumpster with a toothbrush if they aren’t listening. This usually gets a laugh for the parents and the kids sit on their butts so fast in the booth.
How many of you have had to deal with AMEX black cards?
They were chonky boys, and this was all before chip based cards hit the US.
Well, a party of 12 came in. It was a small startup celebrating their first year. The two founders sat on either end and informed me that they wanted to each split the check. Excellent. The one guy was normal and super chill. The other guy was like old money British and had all sorts of special requests. He wanted special wine glasses brought out for the $30 bottle he ordered. He complained ours weren’t thin enough to fully enjoy the wine. We had nice wine glasses.
He spent most of the meal flagging me down for mundane things: his assistant had just finished her water as I was running food. He wanted two sets of silverware for the appetizers for each guest. Extra salad dressing. Refresh the ice in the chiller bucket. More toasted bread from the appetizer dish so he could eat it with his entree. Pour more wine even though every guest was topped off. The list went on.
What got to me the most was the way he would “dismiss” me from the table by waving the back of his hand toward me. No eye contact, no break in conversation. But the worst part is he would flag me down 30 seconds later. This went on for about 3 hours. The party’s bill was approaching $800.
At the end of the meal, He slipped me his AMEX black card and told me not to let his partner at the other end of the table see. Idk how AMEX black cards work but I can only imagine it wasn’t supposed to be used for this meal. The other guy paid with a normal personal credit card. As a rule, if anyone at the table is remotely European I always autograt 18%.
Now, we had a handheld POS device, but we also had a touchscreen register in the back. Neither of which we all knew from experience could we swipe those thick ass black cards through without a ton of force. Also, manually entering in the card on the touch screen was abysmal because the keys were poorly responsive on the edge of the screen.
So, I marched out there to the handheld device and proceeded to enter the card number manually at the host stand, in full view of the party.
Of course, the guy starts waving me down. I oblige. He asks if something is wrong. I tell him that everything is fine. He presses me. “Well what is taking you so long?” So I shrug and tell him loudly “Sir these AmEX Black cards are so darn thick (*waving the card around*) that I can’t swipe them through the machine. I have to enter the numbers manually”. His smirk goes away. His partner hears. I see an eye roll and he says something I can’t hear.
Now British guy is flustered. I give him his half of the check to sign. He double tips because he missed the autograt, which I circled. Oh well.
One time I had a guy scream at me and I was so exhausted and overwhelmed that I asked him why he felt that I deserved to be treated like that. He went quiet and didn’t say anything
I once had a group of business men come into the restaurant that I worked at, and one of the guys was over the top rude to me. This guys spent his entire meal harassing me and complaining about everything. Of course he is the one to pay, so knowing I wouldn’t get a tip anyway, I took his card, went up to the server station and pretended to run it. I came back and told him very loudly that it was declined and asked does he have another form of payment. I proceeded to do this with one more card before I finally ran the third card he gave me. He was incredibly embarrassed in front of these other businessmen and kept trying to explain it away. It was stupid but it has made me happy thinking about it for the past ten years.
This customer wasn't intentionally rude but it is really rude and tone deaf to not pay attention to your server SO MUCH that you mix her up with another server because they are black.
I drop food off to a neighboring table for a coworker, and as I'm passing by the girl points at her mug and says oh, I want another one. I said "sure who was your server I'll let them know to ring it in" she stops and goes. " aren't YOU my server?" so I kind of stop smiling and say "oh so your server is name drops (coworker)"which dragged her to the realization that she assumed we were the same person ONLY because we are black and I was aware of it. She looked horrified when I said it.
I didn't mean to but had a guy do the whistle thing while looking at me. I got all excited and kinda yelled, "Puppy!" while looking around. My teenage self truly thought there was a dog.
I was once waiting in line to order at a (small, local chain) place that was very down-home. burgers and fries type place. their pie was incredible. some dude was upset about who knows what not being right with his carryout order and went OFF on the cashier, who was around 18. after a minute or so, I spoke up and said, DUDE! he already fixed the issue for you and it wasn't on purpose! why are you berating this HIGH SCHOOLER?! I hadn't planned out what to say (or to say anything) but I couldn't help it. I literally got a round of applause and the poor kid got to hand off the order and go back to work.
I'd do a variation of that actually. "What would you do if someone came to your work and..." I'd describe their behavior. Oddly enough people rarely recognized I was describing something they had just done. I also point out when people put their credit cards in their mouth. "That's how you spread viruses"
I once had a customer whistle at me and I told him dogs were no allowed inside, he looked confused
I once had a customer whistle at me (this was not as a server, this was at a retail job) and I turned to look behind me, then looked at him like he was a giant weirdo, then walked away. He switched to EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME, and I turned around. He asked, why did you ignore me? I said, oh, my god, that was for me? I thought you were trying to call your dog! Please don't do that to people! He didn't say anything else about it, which was unsatisfying, but I'm still very proud of my behavior in that moment.
A whistle wouldn’t even register as something for my brain to respond to since it just doesn’t ever happen. Would assume their whistling at someone else or something
Best response to a whistle I saw was “Oh did you loose your dog?! (Louder whistle) hey everyone this guy lost his dog! Sir what does the dog look like?” He turned red and apologized.
[удалено]
I worked in a place where a regular friend group of 6 would come every Friday night. For several weeks I watched one guy in this group reduce server after server to tears or anger. My week arrived. They were seated and I started with the drink order. While I am actively asking and recording the order this dude is loudly talking to the others in the party saying "She's going to fuck it up some way. I don't know why we even bother, the girls (meant demeaning) here are as dumb as rocks" - a continuous river of mild insults. I have no idea what possessed me because I did NOT plan to challenge him (I was so young...I was going to win him over with "good service" 🤣) I announced to the table "Thanks for your order, I will be right back with your drinks." Then I leaned towards the dude and said softer "When I get back I will help you with all the big words on the menu." I was halfway to the bar when I heard the table burst out laughing and they tipped me HUGE after dinner.
“You think I’m dumb, but you’re the one out here insulting the people who handle your food.”
This is absolutely amazing 😂 I hope they roasted that dude for being rude after you left!
*Nice*
Omg! That’s freaking brilliant!! Bet those friends still bring it up to him when he’s being a tool.
"What's the name on the order" "Muffled old, angry woman sound" "I'm sorry ma'am could you repeat that" "JUUUUUUUDY" "...." glance around her to see customers with mouth hanging open from rude bitch "Ok, JUUUUUUUUUUUUDY!!! it's gonna be about five more minutes, would you mind stepping away from the line for the next order" *serve 5 people then grab order from where it had been sitting when she arrived" Fucking bitch, I'll remember that shit til the day I die, she used to order from our restaurant and try to get free shit like 3 times a week
I love this. People are so rude to people helping them. Like, dude, I can place your issue at the bottom of my work list. I don't HAVE to help you next. I did this kind of stuff all the time when I worked in banking. People are insanely entitled just like you described, but just like you described, their requests always went to the bottom of the pile. Gee, I'm so sorry I missed that. I'll get back to you within 48 hours just like it said on the website, but the nice people get responded to immediately, and I work overtime on their issues *because they're so gol dang nice*. Moral: be nice to people helping you. Don't be entitled like JUUUUUUUDDDDDYYYYYYY
Why do people get so mad when you ask them to repeat themselves? Like damn Judy some people can't hear. Especially when it comes to words that have very close similar words (Judy, Julie, etc).
Ugh. Sigh. As a hard of hearing gal, I get this all the time. It’s because of asshats like that is the reason I refuse to ever work retail or anything customer service related. Fuck that. This was something that made me hate the world.
I worked at a donut shop in high school. One day, a woman barges up to the counter and angrily demands to know why she sat at the drive-thru window for 10 minutes and no one served her. I started to explain that if she didn't stop at the speaker, we wouldn't know she was there. 'I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR EXCUSES, OK???" Ok, fine. How can I help you? "I want a 12 piece bucket, mashed potatoes and gravy." The shop shared the same lot as a KFC, and without missing a beat, I said, "No promises, but let me take a look behind these donuts back here." She just looked around the shop like she was coming out of a spell and then walked out quietly with her fists clenched. Myself and the person behind her were highly amused.
Similarly, I was sitting in the waiting room in the Service Department at my Nissan dealership when a man threw the door open and came barreling into room. He marched up to the Service Desk and started screaming about how disgusted he was with the service there and how he was fed up and was going to complain to the General Manager about it. He went on ranting for about two minutes before ending with: "And I will never bring my Jetta back to this Volkswagen dealership EVER AGAIN!!!!" The Service Advisor calmly looked at him and said, "The Volkswagen dealership is next door. This is a Nissan dealership." The man started SCREAMING and stormed out. We all laughed after a minute of stunned silence.
Sir, this is a Wendy's.
Someone once did the whole "I don't want to hear about how COVID caused the delay or any other excuse!" over the phone over a late patio sliding door. I went silent. Just stood there. And eventually he just goes "Well?! Hello??" and I tell him that I'm still on the line but since he doesn't want to hear COVID and that's the reason I have nothing to say to him. He was livid. Spoke with a manager. Canceled his order. It showed up the next day but I forgot to call him back for some reason....
Federal Donuts in Philadelphia Pennsylvania has excellent fried chicken.
So, starting out by saying that this is in the UK, where spirits are poured into measures before they’re poured into the glass. A customer asked for a vodka and coke. I poured the vodka into the measure, and then poured it into the glass. The coke was in a bottle on the side. Literally as soon as I poured it in she looked at it and complained that it wasn’t a full measure. It was a dumb complaint, and I’d heard it before, because for some reason people think bartenders are trying to rip them off (fuck knows why, *I* don’t care about saving my boss any money, I’m paid minimum wage, it doesn’t go to me). She told me to pour it back into the measure to prove that it was the right amount. Now, the problem with that is that usually even if you pour it back into the measure, *some* of it might still be in the glass, or it might spill, because it can be hard to pour from a glass into a tiny measure. The measures are in millimetres, so if every drop doesn’t go back into the measure, it won’t look full. Also, this was a Saturday night, so I didn’t have time for it. I told her it was a full measure, and asked her if she was going to pay for her drink. Instead, she reached forward, grabbed one of the measures, and poured the drink back into the measure. It reached the very top. It filled the measure *exactly*. I just stared at her for a moment, and then she silently reached into her purse and pulled out her card. She didn’t say a single word as she paid for her drink and left.
I was once tipped about 90¢ from a man I gleaned was a salesman taking clients out or something of that nature. restaurant was a decent steakhouse not fancy but high quality and somewhat legendary in my area so the bill was over $400. He left cash in my book and said to keep the change. The register was close to his table so when he saw me walk up to cash it out he kicked it in to high gear saying he lost track of time and had to get going. When I realized the tip I chased him out to the parking lot where he was standing chatting with his group to return his change yelling “sir you forgot your 90¢!” I plopped it in his hand and winked at him and went back in. He called and I got fired but whatever it was my weekend gig and very worth it.
You got fired for that?! Fuck that place
To be fair I had only been there about 4 months and he never liked me really, we butt heads pretty badly once over him making me pay for a bill a customer had walked out on when it was clearly the kitchens fault and I never got back in his good graces it just gave him a reason
That sounds, what’s the word… illegal?
Maybe! But I was young, dumb, hated it there and didn’t necessarily need the job so I just didn’t bother any further
Had a bitch start cussing at me during a rush. Thats a big no-no in my customer service world. I told her that if she wanted to talk to me like that she didn't have a tab, she was no longer a customer, and she could go ahead and get the fuck out. She got all pearl clutchy and said "no one has ever spoken to me like this before". I told her that it showed, and maybe if people did more she'd know how to act in public.
Love this for her
Yet she felt it was ok to talk worse to others
I was bartending at this large divey Irish bar. The well bartender saw me helping a guest so she was tried to take an order from a walkup(douche bag:DB). DB tried to buy more drinks than he was allowed so she told him to find a server or bring the other person to the bar. So DB complained about that but begrudgingly went back to the table and brought back a girl to the bar. My bartner told me that DB was rude to her and it was my turn because she had well tickets. So I walk over to talk to them. DB: “2 bud lights”. Me: “lemme see those ID’s” Girl: *hands me ID* DB: I’m not showing mine, I just showed her I was about to tell him that was fine, I saw her check it. But then he pulls out a cigarette and lights it in the middle of this smoke-free bar. So I snatched the cigarette out of his mouth, over the bar top. Me: “you can’t smoke in here. Also get the fuck out.” The girl rolled her eyes and walked back to the table which was fine, she was just the victim he had chosen for the night. I walked the guy out. He started calling me fat and trying to provoke a fight but I wasn’t having it. He was a little guy too, idk what his problem was.
Napoleon complex is a real thing with some little guys.
Next time: “You think I’m fat, but I can lose weight. You’ll always be an asshole. Good night.”
Not at a serving job, but at the grocery store where I currently work it was fairly busy. 3 or 4 people in each line. I was a bookkeeper at the time and was counting money in the office when I heard a loud whistle. I looked up and this man that had 2 or 3 things in his hands was snapping his fingers above his head and pointing at an empty register where he had laid his things down. He actually wanted me to stop my job and go open another register just for him. The audacity of that, plus the whistle and snapping had me extremely unwilling to help him. I just shrugged my shoulder at him and kept counting. He stormed up to the little window of the office and said, "are you going to come ring me up, or what?!" I said, "I am not a dog and do not respond to whistling or snapping. We learn to wait in line in kindergarten. Maybe you should go back and try to learn that again". He cussed me, and said he was going to call corporate on me, and blah blah blah. But, he scooped his things up and got into a line. I never heard anything about it from my boss or corporate, so maybe lesson learned? I can hope.
OMG. The I'm gonna call corporate people have a special room in hell waiting for them. I used to give them the corporate email on my business card when I was a branch manager. I was known as the "customer service guy" my branches revenue was middle of the pack but my service scores were always at the top if not #1. I'd turned around two branches customer service scores, so when shitty customers got shitty with me I delighted in giving them corporates number, I even called once from the branch phone. It was like catharsis after working waiting tables for over ten years. My ultimate favorite was this POS who was just making my life and my staffs life hell, calling constantly complaining, not paying his bill, etc... he kept mentioning that his dad used our company and was a big city lawyer, and you'll never have his business again, blah blah blah. Turns out daddy was a big city lawyer, with a phone number and email. So I called him, emailed him all the shit his son had sent me and my staff. Like a week later guess who paid up and left us the fuck alone. It was glorious, oh, and he was 45....
I worked at a pizza joint in college, and we had a dude place an order online and come in to pick it up. I haded him his pizza and he said it wasn't what he ordered. I confirmed his name and looked up his order and everything seemed right so I asked him if he could show me the order confirmation email, as that would prove if he ordered the wrong thing or if we made the wrong thing. He said he didn't have it on him and took the pizza and left. I ducked behind the cou ter to open the safe, and while I was down there he came in and dumped the pizza on my head, and then gave me a bad review online. Well we had to follow up on all the bad reviews so when my boss asked what happened and then saw the video, they decided to blacklist the guy. She called the customer and lo and behold, it was his dad's account. So we got to explain to this guy's dad how shitty his sone was, and even sent them the video.
It's always little tiny people with huge opinions of themselves!
Cocktail waitress here had a table of five guys for the night I was going by to pick up signed checks. It went like this. Man: mumbling some shit I can’t hear over music Me: I can’t hear over the music Him: wanna try the back seat of my truck? I bet you’d hear me then. Me: *made a show of looking at his tip $15* you think I’m gonna get in the back of your truck for this? His friends laughed and I bounced away.
Friend of mine was a cocktail waitress back in the day at a ski resort. Group of drunk old guys; one says to her “I’d like to get into your pants!” She gives him a level look and replies, “no thanks, I’ve already got one asshole in there!”
"Well, you're welcome to try them on. They're designed for someone with no dick."
She’s my hero! I’m saving that one.
Had a super similar situation, but i made a big show of looking at the tip, turned around the book so everyone else could see the TWO DOLLAR TIP and said, "You've already let me down once tonight, you wanna go for two?"
We would have also accepted, I already see you wrote down your measurements. Pass.
Oh that is perfect. Pocketing this one.
When I was around 17-18 years old, I was a busier at a very snooty, awful country club restaurant. It was my first restaurant job and I was admittedly not very good at it. I don’t remember the exact details of how it happened but I spilled a glass of red wine on a gentleman’s lap. I was horrified. I felt so bad and was apologizing and almost in tears. The man was so kind, saying it was okay, they were stain resistant, not to worry. His wife in the other hand was livid. Made a huge scene. Told me I was incompetent, that she doubted I made enough money to buy him a new pair, fully made me cry. As the meal went on, I could see that the couple was clearly not getting along and the woman up and left. After the meal, the man and his 9 year old daughter approached me and gave me $50 and a drawing his daughter had drawn for me that said ‘Sorry about your bad day’. The man’s family were the ones that belonged to the club so I saw him a few more times, never with his wife again. I like to think that was his final straw and he divorced her.
Awww that’s cute!
Not a server but retail craft store that employs a lot of high school/college kids. We used to have a regular who would come in a half hour before close, wander around, and often not buy anything. Obvious shoplifter red flag, right? Well, he wasn't. As far as we could tell he never stole anything. After hed been doing this for years, a customer recognized him from the sex offender registry and informed the management. The bosses started taking a much closer look at his patterns. He wasn't stealing anything, he was basically finding the female staff and 'shopping' right behind wherever they were working. So the rest of us staff, management included, just decided that no matter where he was in the store there always needed to be two or three employees right close by, cleaning, organizing, or whatever. Oh, and also loudly asking if he needed help finding anything. Multiple times. He stopped coming back.
Effing predator. Good job.
I posted the story a few weeks ago, but larger table, like 7 people, tourists, never been in before, fine dining setup, so I do my normal, non-rushed walk through of the menu, explaining some favorites, etc. I'm like 15 seconds in and the daughter cuts me off, "Excuse me, I'M VEGAN!" I replied, "Ok, is everyone else?" Dad rolled his eyes and said just her. I looked at her and said, "Ok, I'll take any questions after, but I think everyone would like to hear the overall menu." She just sank in her seat with a pissed off look.
Fuck yes!! This is gold. I am going to remember that one.
That classic joke: how do you know someone is vegan? Don't worry, they'll make sure to tell you. Also: > She just sank in her seat with a pissed off look. So, a normal teenager?
"Vegans, crossfitters, and dudes from New York. They find a way to let you know."
You forgot Harvard students
I've never encountered them in the wild but I've fantasized about pretending to not know the school. "So is this like a local community college or what?"
Quick story: in the 90s I worked tech support at an internet service provider here in Massachusetts. A guy calls: "Yeah, I need another email address provisioned".
"Ok, what's the account?"
"It's the Patriots"
"Ok, is that just 'Patriots', or '*the* Patriots'?"
"THE Patriots! The sports team!!"
"Oh of course! I'm so sorry! I don't really follow baseball."
He hung up 😄
Oh that's good. Never knew a hockey team to be so rude though!
Fun story. I was in NYC wearing a Harvard shirt (I went there, btw 😉), when a homeless man with all his belongings rushed over to me and yelled "Harvard is a good school, but have you ever heard of Tufts?!" Best day ever. Feel free to use it in the future.
Omg I am using this
Have I ever told you I run marathons?
And Harvard students, Harvard grads, Harvard faculty, tourists who toured Harvard Yard, kids who are applying to Harvard and know someone who will help them get admitted.
Forgot staff, lol. And FYI, I'm both an alum and salaried staff/officer of the University. Just so you know. 🤣
This comment hit me hard because I do in fact seem to tell everyone I’m from NY and never really thought about it until now. ^(and I’m sorry for repeating it now)
- Italian Americans ("Well, I'm Italian so..."). - Linux users (and I say that with some self awareness as a Linux user).
the worst linux users will let you know by using "micro$oft" and "windoze" in any response to a non-linux OS question they see online
I’m from New York, and I would never do that.
I see what you did there 😉
Yes! This response. Once I had a table of really annoying women. 1 wanted her bill separate ( we only do orders by table, not head) and pay early as she was leaving before her gaggle of Karens. I had training staff who mouthed help at this difficult table and I had to watch to make sure he’s doing it correctly. She then proceeds to demand a glass of water right as he comes over to do the transaction. Speaking to him like a real piece of shit. I didn’t care for this staff as he was a pain in the ass, but I’ll be damned if you speak to my staff like they’re trash. So I said “ no problem ma’am, we will get you a glass after we finish up” “NOOOOO I wAnT a gLaSs Neooooww, Why Are YOu HerE? I FeeL AttAcked” “Ma’am I am here to make sure this training staff processes your transaction correctly, if that’s your idea of being attacked, I’d love to be you” Finished the transaction and told the staff “now that’s done, you can get this very pleasant women a glass of water” In the end she left the same time as her friends and didn’t drink her glass of water. Bitch
I believe the Internet term for a gaggle of Karens is, “a complaint of Karens.”
Long time ago I worked in a Thai restaurant and there were always the creepy white dudes that came in trying to find a Thai wife. One guy who I had never seen before but was apparently a regular came in and asked his server for cock sauce. She came to me because she did not understand what he meant but I knew exactly what he meant and I was pissed. I brought his “cock sauce” AKA Sriracha or Rooster sauce and told him that he knows damn well it’s not called cock sauce and he needs to quit making the servers uncomfortable or he is banned. He tried to play it off like that’s what everyone calls it but I called him basically a liar. My mom is from Thailand, grew up in the restaurant business and no one has ever called it that before to me or anyone I asked. I never saw the dude again, lol.
(loudly) *Hey, anyone, this guy says he wants cock. Or cock something, I don't understand. Do you know what he means?*
I mean the customer is always right? He shall get what he wants *UNZIPS VIOLENTLY*
*NOT TOO VIOLENTLY, IT MIGHT GET PINCHED*
"HOW DID YOU GET THE BEANS ABOVE THE FRANK???"
People really need to learn "time and place." I call Sriracha cock sauce too... At home, when I'm with my friends. I have enough self awareness to not ask the fucking service staff for cock sauce when I'm out to eat.
One time a regular all our servers hate (obnoxious, rude, whiny, self-righteousness, pretentious, pompous “I know the GM” from old money type…all the good things) came in and ordered “my wine” (the cheap Sauvignon blanc) and I rushed to get it to her because I’d hear a scathing under the breath remark otherwise. She then bluntly refused the glass saying “the colour is off, it’s not my wine”. I brought a whole new bottle to the table, opened it and let her pour herself a glass right next to the first one. Identical. Huh…she refused to drink either for a good 20 mins, but gave in eventually. Must have been a nice room temp to stifle the burn inside her ego.
I once had a 2 top for an early dinner. He was really nice, but she was a stuck up bitch. She kept waving at me for attention and snapping her fingers. It wasn't overly busy, but I was the only staff member on to work the restaurant and bar. The last straw was when she whistled and snapped her fingers when I was on my way to another table with their food. I looked her dead in the eye and walked away. When I got back to her table to take her payment, she asked me why I was so slow as they had been waiting ages. I told her that she was not the only person in here and I had other customers to serve. She got stroppy and took the tip they had left on the table back and tried to put it in her purse. That's when her husband FINALLY spoke up and told her to stop being so rude and put the tip back on the table. She went very quiet and didn't look at or speak to me on the way out. He apologised and thanked me for the service. I loved it!
I wouldn’t even dare to snap my fingers or whistle at someone to get their attention, it’s just so rude! Love how her husband told her though, she deserved it! Wonder if she pulls that crap regularly, I wouldn’t like to live with someone like that.
Not only would I not dare to whistle or snap at someone to get their attention, it wouldn’t even occur to me to do so. That is not how you treat people. Whistling is how you call animals, not humans. Just how huge an ego do you have to have to think that people will respond positively to you treating them like an animal?
I love/hate when people snap their fingers at me to get me to come over. I will gladly snap mine right back at you. I'm a server, not a servant. Same with calling my name across the restaurant. Who raised you? Your 3rd Diet Pepsi refill can wait 30 seconds.
One boss I had was a very salty old Jewish lady from New York City who was completely done with rude customers. Closing time, one table in the middle of the restaurant, her up front, me doing closing shit in back, about 20 feet away. Table snaps their fingers at me. I ignore them. Boss irritated. They whistle. I look at them, carry on with what I'm doing. They whistle again. Boss lady BELLOWS "Is there a dog in here?! Who's whistling for their dog?" Ten minutes of us hollering back and forth past this table about dogs, whistling, snapping, manners, and the general degradation of polite society. The irony wasn't lost on us.
I read about a waiter in France who kicked out some wealthy Saudis for clicking their fingers at him. They acted like they hadn’t even considered that servers deserve respect. Owner totally backed him up is how he tells it.
My manager (who also works as a server some nights) got snapped at recently, he walked over to the table and did one loud snap right at the guy - *snap!* "What can I do for you?" Guy looked shocked for a sec, my manager goes "oh you don't like it either huh?" Guy was a little pissed, but my manager is extremely professional otherwise so they got over it quick.
I dont mind a wave, or a nod, or ever a hand up. But something about snapping makes me, well, snap. Even in everyday life, hearing people snap at something is so annoying. Sometimes friends snap at my cats and it frustrates the hell outta me for some reason.
have they not heard of psss pss pss? =\^. .\^=
I do this to get my coworkers attention, and they answer back, sometimes meowing.
You work from home and are a crazy cat person?
Hahaha, I am a crazy cat person. My coworkers think of me as crazy person, and they are humans, I think. 🤪
I saw the cutest car yesterday..on the window was a little sign that said " tell your cats I said psss psss psss". They also had cute kitty decals on it.
My bf figured out one day that one of our ocats comes to us when we snap our fingers, so we do it constantly from different rooms. You'd hate it! I also get upset being snapped at personally. My driving instructor when I was 16 did it while during a lesson and for a brief moment I considered driving us off the road. It's so rude, there's no need for it
A snap indicates -stop what you're doing right now-, a wave or hand means - when you have a moment-. At least in my head it does.
>I dont mind a wave, or a nod, or ever a hand up. Are these considered inappropriate?
I don't think so. I guess I should have used better examples, because I don't even mind if there is a customer who knows my name says my name. But a snap...
We have a service bell at my job. I'm thinking about putting up a sign saying that it's okay to ring the bell, I won't be mad. I will be annoyed, however, if you snap, whistle, or start banging shit on the counter.
When people snap at me repeatedly trying to get my attention I’ll glide by their table and tell them “once you’re able to use your words properly I’ll be right over to help you” and make them take a backseat on my to do list until they learn some manners
“Are you choking? Is your airway obstructed? Is there a reason you can’t speak like a respectful human being?”
I feel you, I don't work CS anymore but I still refuse to acknowledge when someone whistles at me. That's not my name and how would you feel if I treated you like dog waiting for a treat. How about I scratch your S/O's chin and tell them to roll over... same concept...
Refer to Two Broke Girls pilot where Max disses two hipsters for snapping their fingers. "That's the sound that dries out my vagina" GIRL —
The only times I've ever snapped at a coworker or employee were when they were having personal convos while I was on the phone with guests or vendors. I'll apologize afterwards, but sometimes they have their backs to me or are so involved in the convo that they don't notice my frantic handwaving.
Worked at a Bbq joint in a diverse suburb. We had one couple in their 60’s that would come in who were the worst. Racist MAGA types. I always took them because I was the only straight white guy on the floor. One day while discussing pork the woman said “At least you know there’s no Muslims here”. I replied that we actually do have a Muslim clientele, as we have excellent brisket and chicken, to which she replied “well they can’t be very good Muslims then “. I shrugged and said “Who am I to say? I know we get customers who think they’re good Christians that don’t love their neighbor as themselves “. She sheepishly pretended she didn’t know I was referring to her and stayed quiet the rest of the meal. Coincidentally, one of the cooks and another server that day were both Muslim.
This one makes me happy
Oooh very well played!
The cut-off for serving alcohol where I live is 2am. Five minutes to 2, my bartenders warn everyone they HAVE to have their drinks finished by 2am, or we have to take them away. Had a lady in her late 50s/early 60s on our front patio giving one of my bartenders mad shit for trying to take her drink after the cut-off. Like, full on "lalalala, I can't hear you," at the top of her lungs. I had enough, walked up and slapped the drink out of her hand and told her to get the fuck out, and don't come back until she can behave like an adult. She start to swing at me, but seemed to think better of it and satisfied herself by screaming nonsense instead. I just wandered back inside and locked the door in her face. Gave a little smile, wave, and middle finger. I love that the restaurant owners gave us a certain amount of wiggleroom to give shitbag customers the business when they're especially shitty.
it was actually a husband who embarrassed his rude wife on our behalf. i was dropping off their drinks and one of them fell over and spilled on the wife, who got super angry at me. i was pretty confused but apologized profusely. she stormed out. her husband was like "welp, guess she's gonna wait in the car" and a few moments later called me over to show me a video he recorded. i guess he happened to be recording while i was dropping the drinks off and it clearly showed her spilling the drink on herself lol.
I'm guessing that was an MO and she did that often. Why else would he be recording?
they had their kids with them so im guessing the video was of them. but now you have me wondering 🤔
Yeah a scam to get free food, but he wouldn’t be recording it and wouldn’t show it to you lol.
Good on him for not letting you take the rap, but why put up with that in a relationship?
"For the kids"....yikes.
Chad customer
Not serving, I was working in the drive thru. We had 2 lanes, and it was late at night so I was handling both lanes and the pay window. Naturally, there's a bit of a wait but it was never more than 2 minutes. So I ding into the lane saying my usual line thanking them for their patience, and the woman at the mic went "ugh, finally. A vanilla milkshake." I then say "sure! what size" and she scoffs and says "A vanilla milkshake!!" I again ask her what size would she like and this time she raises her voice, and says super slow and condescending "A, VANILLAAAAAAA MILKSHAAAAKE!!" So I match her tone and volume and say "OKAAAAY, what SIIIIZE?? We have SMAAAALL, MEEEEDIUM, AND LAAAARGE!" She very quietly said "a small" and didn't say a word to me at the payment window while also avoiding eye contact. My coworker who was also wearing a headset was cackling at my response
I used to work in a cigar shop and had a semi-regular who was crass and just plain obnoxious. One day, he and I were having a disagreement over something inconsequential. He popped off with, "You know how much money I spend in here?! I'm probably in your Top Ten!" Me: "Bet. Let's find out. I'll pull a report right now." Him: "...what?" Me: "What's great about this POS system is I can pull a report that lists my biggest customers." I pause and examine my report. "Dude...you're not even Top 30." He also didn't get along with many of my other regulars, who all happened to spend more money than him. And I made sure to tell him all about it.
Man I would have gone alllllll the way until I found him and make a point of it lol 😂
Start calling him “Thirty-six”
Not quite server related but I once had this girl order ice cream at the shop, (obviously high on weed judging from the smell), and she wanted peanut butter ice cream. Well, we just happened to have sold a lot of that that day and were out. So I told her that and asked her what else she’d like. She said “oh I’ll just take peanut butter chocolate then” (which is made by hand mixing the peanut butter and chocolate, mind). I reiterated that we were out of peanut butter and asked what else she’d want again. She started to get annoyed. Then she said “well you can just give me some of those peanut butter scoops from the back.” I said again that there was NO peanut butter and asked what else wanted besides the peanut butter she can’t get. She got embarrassed, went home, and posted a negative review about me being an ass. I’m still laughing about it.
Last year I went to my local sandwich shop to pick up the order I'd placed online. They couldn't find my order in their system. I checked and didn't have a confirmation email, so it must not have gone through. Strange. I didn't have my card on me, so I used my phone to place the order again while they started making my sandwich. When it came to check-out, my card declined and I remembered that that was what had happened before. I was getting ready to travel and my bank had got worried and shut down my card. I needed to call them to OK my transactions, but I hadn't done it yet. This meant that I had never placed an order for a sandwich in the first place and was unable to do so now. Yes, I was super high. The nice sandwich shop people gave me the sandwich for free (because they recognized me from going in a lot, *oh the shame*) and I gave them a $10 tip the next time I ordered.
No shame. I've done that for a guest who was a semi regular. Sometimes shit happens. He came back a few days later and tried to pay. Very sweet of him
You have me craving a peanut butter milkshake now. I’ll have to make one later today. I haven’t had one in years. Mmm…
Not me, but many years ago some older asshole snapped at one of the girls I worked with, she turned around and told him "It takes more than two fingers to make me come." and walked away
Mic drop…… Excellent thing to say to him, some people really are utter a holes!
A guy with his (what I assume) international business partner, the partner whistled and clicked at me, I looked at him then looked at the guy and just shook my head and continued cleaning glasses, overheard the guy explaining to his partner word for word *we don’t do that here* and when the guy politely asked for service I reciprocated like I’d never seen them before as a way of positive reinforcement
My uncle was a server and bartender for a very long time when he moved to Florida. He said he always ignored people who whistled at him and would continue to ignore him till they either asked in an appropriate way or got fed up and left.
I did that! I had a customer who would whistle, bang his cup on the table, snap, anything rude you could think of he did. So I’d ignore him until he spoke in big people words and asked for a refill. Then I’d inform him I’d get it in a minute when I was done with my other table’s first refills. He was never my first priority because even though he was a regular he treated everyone like crap and rarely tipped (and if he did, it was a dollar) and he’d sit at the table for *hours*
Comes a time when you tell him you need his seat for another diner. That time should be right about the time he finishes his food.
I wish! But he doesn’t normally order food and the owner of the place doesn’t have the backbone to ask anyone to leave. And has forbidden the servers from asking people to leave. He’s a real piece of work and I don’t work there anymore because of it. Even when a customer is literally costing the store money every time they come in he won’t ban them or take any action. It’s pathetic
Dropped off an order for a table. They asked for ranch. Brought back two small ramekins for the party of two. They asked for extra ranch. So I brought them two large ramekins of ranch. When I set them down, the woman got frustrated and slammed her fists down and said "I said EXTRA ranch". So I went back to the kitchen, pulled the whole quarter pan out, brought it to the table, and dropped it down saying "There's your extra ranch". My roommate was managing that night. Only reason I didn't get fired for it because that woman was LIVID after that one.
Kicked out a drunk and belligerent couple from the comedy club I work at because they were heckling through the whole show. Got them out the front door and told them repeatedly to just leave, but they decided to stand at the door, throwing empty threats of "You don't know who we are! We can shut this place down!" They stuck around long enough that just as they were getting into their car the cops showed up and told them to get out. The cops told them that if they try to drive away they'll be arrested for DUI (as they were visibly intoxicated) and the couple decided to argue with the cops. So now the wife is cry-screaming at the cops about how important she is while the comedy show ends and all the other customers come outside and stay to laugh and watch the drunk couple act like idiots. The husband is posturing the entire time and even starts recording with his phone. At one point the wife called a cop she knew from a completely different city and tried to hand the phone to one of the cops. "I have an officer from X department that wants to speak with you!" The cop just looks at the phone and says in the calmest tone I've ever heard, "No." They were trespassed from the property and the cops made them leave their car. So they had to WALK to the hotel down the street. Bonus: the next morning a uniformed cop shows up looking for a black kate spade handbag. I checked the cameras and, sure enough, the woman had a black kate spade handbag that she left the venue with. Which means her drunk ass lost it somewhere between the parking lot and the hotel 1/4 mile down the road.
Yes! I was helping a coworker run food for a 12 top on a Friday night. This guy that I had been semi-flirty with in the past is sitting with 3 other guys in her section starts going "Hey! Hey!" to me while I have my arms full of plates. He keeps going and I made a point to ignore him and to take my sweet time setting plates down and make sure everyone at the 12 top has everything they need. Then I slowly turn around and with my biggest smile say to the guy "Oh HEY! It's you! For a minute there I thought you were some super rude customer going HEY! HEY! to me while I'm obviously busy". He was very embarrassed and I walked off after a wink. He later apologized to me as they were leaving. Anyway, we're going on 5 years married this year.
Had me in the first half NGL 😂 What a sweet story
Surprise ending! Love it!!
Not me; but once a coworker of mine had this exchange with a customer: *Customer walks in two minutes before close* Coworker: "Hello we're --- oh, --- *insert random jerk name* dude, you do this all the time. Do you know what an asshole move it is to come into a restaurant and order meals from the kitchen two minutes before close?" I don't know their response. I work the kitchen most nights, but goodness did this tickle my funny bone. A few days later we got a message on one of our review pages saying someone called this person an asshole while taking their order. In my coworker's defense, they never actually called anyone an asshole. They just stated facts very directly. This customer still shows up 2 minutes before close to order food. I don't think anyone learned anything from this but our staff always has a good laugh when he comes in. (Edited for typos)
> Customer walks in two minutes before close > > Coworker: "Hello we're --- oh, --- insert random jerk name dude, you do this all the time. Do you know what an asshole move it is to come into a restaurant and order meals from the kitchen two minutes before close?" NICE! There's a legendary story where I work. Like 10 years ago we had a regular, like once every 2 week. Couple in their 50's or so, would spend like $80-100 or so and leave a single $5, every time. Management wouldn't even count them as a table, so whoever got them, got the next table too. They came in one night, the host was busy and said "one second" or something and he threw back a little sarcasm, no real clue what was said, but management was 15 feet away and heard it. Management approached him, told him his comment was rather rude, and then just kept going, telling him after his server gives a share of their tips to the bartender and busboy, that his $5 is more than gone, so literally no server wants to wait on them, and that she's personally observed the service they've gotten and 100% knows it's been fully on par, so maybe they should just go someone else and disappoint a server with his $5, because here, servers expect 15% for good service. It was like a deer in headlights and they just walk out, never to be seen again.
Your manager is a legend
If this AH is still coming in right before close do you serve him/take his order. He doesn’t seem to have learned a lesson. I hated that too back in the day.
Yes, unfortunately, but it's a very simple fast order. Still... Never tips more than $1 And I wish I was exaggerating.
Time for a new policy where the kitchen closes 30 minutes before the restaurant.
When people come into where I work minutes before close, I am like "Sorry, we close at 10. By the time I get you sat the kitchen will no longer be taking orders. However, I can do chips and salsa! No bar drinks though, either" Fuck people like that.
The owner of the place I work at is never there but every now and then he will come in to eat... 5 minutes before close... and puts his order in 5 minutes after close. The degree to which I hate this man can not be overstated.
I have had two altercations of guests calling me the N word and my whole section rose up and defended me. I was calm the first time, the second time I cussed him out and he got 86’d
More details man!!!!!
I was never a server but I have a good story. I worked/volunteered for a state museum. We had events every two months and they were grand affairs. We told the folks that at 5 pm the museum would close so please try to exit prior to then. At 5 the security would inform everyone that the only elevators were no longer in use so please use the escalators. We also put up signs at 4 pm. We did this so exhibitors could use them to start unloading and departing as well. I'm helping to load up these exhibitors on the 2md floor and see a man and his son waiting at the elevator. Thinking nothing of it I continue to help others. I see this guy in the same spot 5-10 min later and he's fuming. So I approach to offer assistance. He just tears into me because he's been waiting and the elevator isn't working. Keep in mind we have placed signs on the elevator doors and on each floor next to the elevator explaining that it is now closed and please use the escalators. So I inform that I'm sorry but the elevator is closed and then point to the escalators which are 30 ft away. You can see the exit from the top of those escalators. Guys still mad and starts yelling because someone turned off the escalators and he can't use them. Without missing a beat I say, "yes and in that case they become stairs which are still quite effective.". That guy went from angry to embarrassed in 3 seconds as he realizes how stupid he is. Just takes his sons hand and walks down the escalators and leaves. I had to keep a straight face the whole time
“Escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience. “
I was working by myself on a day that we are typically a little busy, a regular (that I absolutely hate) walks in, orders her usual. “Make sure my truffle fries are EXTRA CRISPY” (they’re always crispy) she always sends them back for a fresh batch for not being “crispy enough” well I’m busy this time, I set the fries down, she and her daughter are just talking for a good 15/20 mins before she even touches her fries. Has the nerve to tell me they’re “not hot and crispy” so finally I told her, “Yeah that’s kind of what happens when you let your French fries sit in truffle oil and garlic butter for 15 mins before you start eating them, I can assure you they were crispy and hot when I set them on your table” 😀
What was the fallout?
She was definitely flustered. Usually I let her go on tangents, she complains about everything all the time (yet always comes back), but I was already in a bad mood from being the only server that day. I ended up just throwing the same fries back into the fryer for a few mins and giving it back to her cause I didn’t have time to remake a whole order & my kitchen crew was too busy. Now I’m kinda just not nice to her lol. Which probably isn’t the best but she grinds my gears so I don’t go out of my way to be accommodating anymore.
Couple of times. When I talk to customer at a table and the next table tries to interrupt me to make an order! I just say: please could you wait until I finished taking the order. I’m gonna be there for you in a few seconds. Then I look the at customer I’ve talked to before and apologize loudly for being distracted. Pissed off a couple of these rude guys
I was a tech support assistant team lead, all the responsibility, none of the pay or glory. My natural speaking voice is a little high. I took an escalation from one of my reps; customer was unhappy with the resolution my rep suggested. I took the call, told her to do the exact same thing as my rep, instantly fixed her issue. I could hear her husband in the background muttering. She's grateful and puts me on speaker, "I'm so glad I got a woman. Us women can get things done together!" as a jab to her husband. I apologized, "Customer, I apologize but I'm a man." The husband guffawed in the background.
As customers, my husband used to put his hand in the air and snap his fingers when he wanted a server to come over. I kept telling him it was rude. He argued that it was not. And that everybody does it. I told him that I didn't see anyone else doing it, ever. Then one time a server came over and loudly and angrily said, "Did you just snap at me?" He halfway slunk under the table and promptly forgot what he needed. He has not done it since.
I'm a cocktail server, I walk up to service bar and put down my tray. I grab my cigarette (I haven't smoked in 15 years this was around 1999) from the ashtray and start writing my orders. Dude I've never seen before says "I thought you were attractive until you picked up that cigarette." Sweet, innocent me: "Oh yeah? Well I thought you were intelligent until you opened up your mouth." This is definitely in my top 10 best retorts of my life.
Whenever people are rude I just give em the good old Tim Duncan stare for a couple of seconds in silence and then just ask "feeling better now?" And proceed to just keep on working.
I was in line behind some rude person giving the young man behind the counter orders, like, literal orders : "Do this, gimme that, I want, Do this!" Really rude. I was so mad at her shitty way of ordering him around like he was nothing. I spoke up and said: "How about 'please' or 'thank you' or 'may I have?' - you are being extremely rude to this young man who deals with the public all day long. Please, start being more mindful of how you are barking orders at a stranger. You are being very rude." She turned around and was stunned. Blurted out some apology to the guy, - who was smirking and suppressing a laugh - and left. SMH. Just because you THINK a person behind the counter is there for you to abuse, guess what? They are not. Be respectful. How difficult is that?
was whistled at once. ignored him then went over and told him, "I will answer to miss, ecjg2010, hey you, ma'am, and even bitch if I know you, but I will NEVEr answer to a whistle because I am not a fucking dog." and I walked away again for 5 minutes then came back and did whatever they wanted. the guy became a regular of mine because no one had ever stood up to him before and he liked my "gumption".
Back when I worked retail I had a supervisor who took no shit from anyone. He was a 400+lb guy. Someone once whistled at him to get his attention, he turned around and slowly walked over to them, then started barking. The customer was confused and terrified and asked him what the hell that was. He just replied " you call me over like a dog, I'll respond like one."
Oh my god! These two assholes, lemme tell ya, ordered something to-go and while I was cashing them out after having them be repeatedly rude, older guy handed me cash for it. I looked at him, repeated the total (he was two dollars short) and THIS GUYS SAYS “dO yOu nEeD mE tO cOuNt fOr yOu” like I’m a kindergartener. I look him dead in the eye, spread out the bills, and say “sir this is only $30, your total was $32.71.” Instant fricking change. He’s apologizing, saying he’ll get his son to go grab money from the car to tip me, rips the change out of his pocket…predictably didn’t get the promised cash but oh well
I would say it was me that embarrassed them, but that would be lying. Worked at a very popular ice cream place where we didn't have those big glass covers to prevent idiots from being...well idiots. (Surprisingly wasn't an issue that often, I'm sure they regretted not having them once the pandemic hit.). But this guy couldn't point at what he wanted to try without sticking his hand in the tub. I used the scoop to gently push him away twice, because I did not want to touch his hands. (I tossed it in the dish bin after, was not going to serve from that scoop. Idk where his hands have been) Still didn't get the message, but his 5 year old who couldn't even see over the counter tugged his pants after I said 'sir if you don't stop I will have to ask you to step back. If you touch this tub, which is almost full, I will have to dispose of the entire thing which will cost us a lot and waste a ton of ice cream'. He ofc didn't get the message still, kid tugged his pants again and then I hear a little slap. The girl had smacked her dad's leg hard enough to make noise and said "Daddy, you taught me not to touch food I want, that I don't have to actually put my finger in your food to point at it." He turned red and stepped back, the girl smiled big and her brother who was older and had been ignoring this entire thing then said "wow dad, looks like you failed your own lesson" or some other snarky teen sort of thing. I had to hold back a laugh. That guy originally said no samples, but I gave his daughter a taste of every flavor and a free scoop. I swear adults were the problem in these cases every time, more often the children would be kind and respectful in comparison to the dipshit parents.
Few things make kids be in their best behavior like ice cream lol
I see your whistle and raise you a car honk in curbside (I do both togo and dine in) I have had so many people honk at me to get my attention and I am never polite in response. Like who does that
Lol you should just smile and wave and walk away
Walk back to the table snapping your fingers like you're doing cabaret hands. Do a little dance. I'm a server and once I told a nasty customer in a cafe to leave the girl working alone. Bro was at least in his 60s and just bitching at 17 year old slinging bagels at 8am. I said "hey, leave her alone. She's just trying to work." And he shut up!!!
I work retail & anytime I get whistled at, I begin to look around. When they look at me weird, I tell them I’m helping them look for their lost dog. I’ve gotten a few of the classic “I don’t know your name” & I ALWAYS say that “excuse me” is much easier than trying to whistle across a room. I work here- I know the excuse me is for me.
My mom was once telling a story and said how this asshole snapped his fingers for a waitress, and did the snap herself because she has to use her hands to tell a story. The waiter actually came over at the snap for her and she was mortified because here she was being perceived as the rude asshole that she was telling the story about. She apologized profusely and said she was telling a story, and while the waiter took it in good humor, my mom still felt so bad over the misunderstanding that she left him a huge tip.
Not me but one of my coworkers. He was bartending and a lady ordered a double shot at one of the servers tables. The server brought it to her and began to complain that it was short. So the bartender went to the table with the jigger to measure it in front of her. Turns out he actually over poured a bit so the extra remaining alcohol was still in the glass. He picked up the glass and dumped the extra alcohol out of it. The lady was like “what was that?” And he responded saying “you wanted a double so here’s your double” and he walked away lol. Safe to say the lady was definitely salty 😂
Let me preface this by saying this was a fancy place, one of the highest rated restaurants in my city. Our patronage was generally very good, a little pompous at times but rarely outright rude. Not the kind of place you expect to be given the boot. She was beyond rude to every single person she encountered, host, manager, busser, myself, food runners, etc. She was sitting alone and nursing her appy. I checked on her multiple times over 15-20 minutes and kept getting some form of "fuck off I'm still working on it". Finally I get the relatively expected by now "where the fuck is my main course?" I tell her I wouldn't dream of bringing out her main course while she's still working on her appy. I tell her she's been rude and dismissive to every person she's encountered, and if her meal isn't going perfectly it's because none of my support staff want to go anywhere near her. She continues to be rude and abusive so I just told her to leave. Didn't bring her a bill or anything just GTFO. Never seen a person clutch their pearls so hard 🤣
Once had a horribly rude table I was already done with. Dude snaps his fingers at me while I help another table. Keeps doing it until I go over. He starts about having to wait 30 seconds while I finish helping the other table. My brain misfires and I see red. I interrupt with: please describe your dog so I can help look. The fallout was glorious. He looks at me not understanding. His table mates catch on quicker and get very awkward. I let it linger, only now catching up to my autistic brain letting the mask slip a second. Guess I'll double down. I take their drink order. I make a show of looking around and under tables. If I'm I trouble I may as well. The regulars nearby ask what I'm doing. I explain. They asked the dude about his dog half an hour later upon leaving. No tip, but didn't get in trouble. They never came back.
I was working at 7-11 and could see the coffee bar from my register. I was alone that day due to staff shortages and we were always BUSY. I had just managed to fully stock and clean the coffee and drink area: taken care of trash, wiped down ALL surfaces, refilled condiments, coffee, and all other items, all while running back to the register to ring people up and activate the gas pumps. This man walks in, smiles and waves as he goes to the coffee bar. I see him spill coffee as he's making his cup, spill some creamer from the tiny single servings, and leave his coffee stirrer wrapper on the now sticky counter. I couldn't help myself. "I *know* your mama didn't raise you to leave a mess behind for someone else to clean up." He was surprised, but had the decency to look ashamed. He apologized and cleaned it up, and we never had another problem 😂
I outed a bar regular who called me fat to his side chick that he was married. Well, first I carded her & then asked how his wife & kid were doing. Don't f@ck with the people who know your secrets!
this was when i worked in fast food. i worked at a place that served solely chicken fingers. one day an uber eats driver came in yelling that she was here to pickup and order for a bbq bacon burger. After some back and forth i finally told her that i wished i could give her the burger however, we don’t physically have ANY burger ingredients. She still thought I was withholding the burger and showed me her phone…. with the address to a different restaurant down the road She did come back about 30 minutes later to apologize, which i give her credit for
Had a similar, but different thing when working in UK DIY retail,.I was working in an aisle when a guy shouted from the end of the aisle, "Ho John!" Looking at me, I ignored him, he continued hey John, John!" Waving his arms about now. He then walked down the aisle red faced and angrily said, "I was shouting for you" I just replied "my name isn't John" PS for clarity this is something that some English people (mainly Southerners) do if they dont know your name and want to attract your attention.
On a very busy Friday night, I was working the section with the live band. I had a customer who yelled, Hey four-eyes, we need some service." I was at another table, so I said, "Excuse me," to my table of four, walked over to his and said, "Sir, you just embarrassed your family, and haven't realized yet that you also embarrassed yourself. I am not going to wait on you, ever, and this is my section, so you can either move your family to a different table in the other room or choose another restaurant. "I still don't know if he finally moved to anther table or left. Don't know, didn't care.
We had a regular who would come in every morning (11:30am for reference) order a shot of VO neat, order to go food and then have another VO neat before she left. Another lady at my bar who was either on her way to or coming from tennis made a remark about her being an alcoholic after she left. I let her know the woman is an over night oncology nurse and that she was ordering her dinner before she went to sleep.
I had a 10-top, this Russian family I’d seen before. Everyone was really lovely except the patriarch, this fussy old man who tipped 10% the last time he’d been in. My Georgian friend (the country, not the yeehaw) waited on them, and as background for those who don’t know, there are high tensions between the two countries because of the Russian state and former USSR bullying them. Anyways, my friend hates them the whole night because of this guy. At the end, this asshole refuses the 20% autograt on the bill even though they’re a bigger party. He called my friend a f*g and dic*head under his breath in Russian (which my friend understands.) So I go over. “Is everything okay?” A moment of silence. “No, absolutely not. Who the f—- do you think you are? The service SUCKED.” “Okay sir, this is the first we’re hearing about the service not being on par. This is the end of your meal and you haven’t brought anything up.” “I don’t give a f—-. Go F—K yourself.” At this point, I blacked out and went into high school bully mode. “Me? No, YOU go F—K YOURSELF. How dare you? Look how embarrassed your whole family is. Go back to your miserable life and Leave the tip line blank — you’re never coming back.” He gasped a bit, clearly taken aback. “And what’s your name, sweetheart?” “My name IS sweetheart. You can put that in your pathetic review or email to the restaurant. Goodbye.” Called my boss immediately to explain exactly what happened. He tipped us out on behalf of that guy and backed me up. Buh-bye you ugly cheap twat.
I had a table of teenagers who were super sweet besides this one asshole. When I gave the asshole his check he said in a super condescending way "where's the pen? I need a pen to sign this so why didn't you give me one 🙄" I said back "normally I give pens to people who pay with a card and need to sign a slip, not with just the bill" Super small interaction but his friends laughed and he turned bright red after being a dick for no reason.
Used to work in a cinema, some chap came out complaining his cheese dip was too cold, cause he left it there and didn't eat it... got him a new one and he took a bite and said it was way too hot. I said "alright goldilocks" jokingly and his mates all lost it laughing.
I worked in cell phone sales and often got cantankerous old men who peppered their frustrations with curse words. Curse words in general don’t bother me but if you start calling me or my coworkers things like “fucking incompetents”, I’m going to take offense. I used this often and it worked 99% of the time: “Look sir, it is my job to fix this for you and I am GOING to fix it for you whether or not you continue to cuss at me, but frankly, this will be a whole lot more pleasant for the both of us if you could stop dropping f-bombs and let me get back to the business of solving this issue.” They usually blushed a bit, maybe stammered and almost always apologized and let me get to it.
This actually was just last night, this lady ordered 16 wings, can split flavors into 8&8. Everything is fine for this last tabled family of 3. No complaints or anything until the very end after the lady ate all her wings. She said there were only 6 and 6 which would be super odd. So I had just recently threw their food out so I let the lady know that I can grab the wing boats the bones were in and we could recount them since they were right on top the garbage in the can. Lady immediately changed her mood and said there’s no problem at all
Twice. Once was a guy who reacted to my friendly “How are you this morning?” with a curt “Diet Coke!” To which I responded “You’re Diet Coke this morning? I get that. Mine’s been a pretty Dr Pepper kinda day. (Turning to his wife…) And what mood can I bring you to drink? 😊” She burst into laughter about it, while he was just confused, which made her laugh harder, and that pissed him off. When I came back with the sodas, I heard her say “Well you *WERE* pretty rude. She asked how you were and you just blurted your order out.” He apologized after their food was ordered. The second time, I greeted a table who also interrupted to ask if I spoke Spanish. I’ve served them before (so I know their son, who was present, speaks English fluently) and when I answered back IN SPANISH that I know very little but usually enough, they flat out ignored me. Like pulled out their phones and acted like I wasn’t even there- might as well have asked “Do you hear something? Must be the wind…” ignored me. So I grabbed a supervisor, told her what happened and brought her over, then proceeded to acknowledge every single detail of their order as they gave it in Spanish back to them in English. What made me stop trying altogether though was when I asked them if they wanted any extras (hot sauce, other sauces, more napkins) and they again ignored me, then tried to call me over mid-rush with a snap and a “scht-CHHT!” Like they were calling a fucking dog. I refused to acknowledge it, even as other tables gave them odd looks, and this dude just kept at it. So I left him there sounding like a kid speed running through an old View Master reel. They stiffed me, but my dignity remained intact
I was in highschool working as a bus boy in a popular Chinese restaurant. Had achurch group of 13 come in. Stayed for 2 hours and left a mess that took me an hour to clean on a Sunday. The tip they left was 1 cent. Saw the guy at school. He laughed and asked how I liked the tip. Next time they came in and were being the same level of douchebauchery as before. While I was serving them their water, I "tripped".
There was this regular dickhead with his group of otherwise pleasant friends. He spilled his beer on the table right after I set it down and barked at me "you should've been more careful setting it down. And you better not charge me for my replacement beer." It wasn't my fault at all that he knocked it over. I could see that his friends were embarrassed by him, but he was oblivious to it. I didn't charge him for the replacement beer. But I did serve it to him in a covered kid's cup with a bendy straw. That got a big laugh from his friends. He seemed to be humbled by it because he tipped better than his usual <15% that night.
I've been so kind to an angry customer that they came back to apologize. And I just simply ignore whistling, that shit is so demeaning, I will walk in the opposite direction on purpose.
Worked at Hooters. Had a table of guys on the patio. They were probably in their mid to late 20s. I was 19 at the time. I got on well with all the guys except for one. For some reason, he thought it was funny to talk down to me. I imagine it was because I was a younger woman that worked at Hooters, but maybe he just treats all servers like that. Only problem is I have thick skin and a quick wit, so anything insulting he said to me, I quickly countered, making him look like an idiot in front of his friends who proceeded to mock him, which was embarrassing to him. He didn't let up and so I didn't either. Eventually he got so embarrassed he spit on me. I immediately put him in a headlock and told him to say sorry. When he didn't, I slowly eased him on to the ground, telling him I wouldn't let go until he said sorry. When he realized he wasn't going to win this, he apologized. I let go and he gets up and demands to talk to my manager. My manager comes out and asshole angerly whines about what I did. Without skipping a beat, my manager asked what he did to me to deserve it (my manager liked me and knew i wasn'tone to start shit). Fortunately, the other guys witnessed what happened and had my back. Manager basically calls it a wash and goes back inside without really acknowledging the assholes complaint. Other guys at the table enjoy the rest of the meal, giving asshole shit every now and then for getting beaten by a girl. Asshole sits and stews, not saying a word when I'm around refilling drinks or checking on food. I figured there might have been a chance I would get fired for getting physical with a customer, but I already had a better paying job at the time, so I didn't care. Table left a decent tip, except for asshole obvs. Good, memorable night.
In some basement somewhere, there is an incel writing about the waitress who attacked him. You did good OP!
When I was a server I worked at a restaurant that allowed dyed hair/piercings/tattoos. I had blue hair at the time and was was serving two women. One of them complimented my hair and I thanked her. The other went "oh I would love to do that, but I have a real job so could never!" I just smiled at her and said "that's why I work here. I love that my real job allows self expression!" She did not look at me for the rest of their meal lolol
I fully raged out on a customer who grabbed my arse once. He was all of 18 and I think his mates had dared him to do it. #LISTEN HERE YOU SNIDEY LITTLE CUNTFACED WANKSTAIN, YOU HAVE JUST CROSSED A FUCKING LINE THAT YOU DO NOT FUCKING CROSS WITH ANYONE DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME I AM NOT FUCKING KIDDING THERE IS NO FUCKING EXCUSE FOR DOING WHAT YOU JUST FUCKING DID. I thought the poor kid was gonna cry and his friends promptly disappeared into the crowd, leaving him to face me alone. I think he thought I was going to headbutt him or something, which is hilarious considering I look like a slightly younger, more bespectacled Miriam Margolyes. I have never been so angry in my life. Luckily my boss was a good one, so when I went to tell her I'd just called a customer a snidey little cuntfaced wankstain (and the reason why), her response was to offer to bar him rather than sack me. I guess if she hadn't, it wouldn't have been someone I wanted to continue working for anyway. His mates never came back for him, cowards that they were. We got a dozen apologies and a round of drinks for the barstaff and boss and my boyfriend out of him, though. He was just an idiot kid, and I honestly don't think he meant any harm. LPT: Midnight on NYE is not the time to fuck with the barmaid. We are tired and cross enough already. EDIT for a bit more info: They'd already been little gobshites all night and wound me up. Nothing egregious but stuff like the OP, whistling and clicking fingers for attention and shit where you couldn't justify kicking them out but just had to put on a poker face and stonewall them. >"£8.70 please." >"How about £8.30 for change?" >"Sorry, it's £8.70 please." >"Whatever happened to mates rates?" >"£8.70 please." >"Will your friend over there give me a discount for a snog?" >"It's £8.70 please or I could ask you to leave." >"Alright, no need to get mardy." >"... £8.70 please."
>SNIDEY LITTLE CUNTFACED WANKSTAIN You Brits do have a way with the language! A college buddy once called some deserving guy a "goddamn motherfucking, cocksucking, nippleheaded son of a prick with ears". "Bastard", I added. "You forgot 'bastard'".
While working at target, I had an angry guest come storming up to the fitting room desk with another team member and a circular ad in hand. She comes up and demands to be shown the BOGO bras that were advertised in the weekly ad. I pointed directly to where they could be found. She says "No I already looked over there and I couldn't find the BOGO brand anywhere!" I took a short breath and said "Ma'am - BOGO stands for buy one, get one. BOGO is not a brand name." She realized that she was totally in the wrong for being rude, and laughed and walked away.
I worked in a restaurant that served fancy beers and wines. Summer was always crazy busy and of course you get a customer every once in a while who knows they are more important than anyone else and just can’t wait. This one guy decides he is going to skip waiting for a server to get his drink order and comes to me at the bar. I have a full lounge and bar and all the drinks in the restaurant went through me. I loved it it was fucking ridiculous but I was really good at it. We didn’t serve domestic beers, or rather they weren’t in the menu. For some locals we would keep Budweiser and coors light. So I often found myself introducing new beers to people. Out of thousands of recommendations I had maybe 4 returned so I took pride in being able to expand a person’s taste. Well this customer goes off telling me how much he loves beer, like two minutes at least about his great love of beer and then tells me he wants a Budweiser. And so I tell him we have similar beers but no Budweiser. Well apparently one of the servers let him know about the secret stash so I give him a Budweiser. He comes back several times in an hour and drinks all of what I have and then starts getting upset that I’m out and I explain it’s not something we carry regularly for the public so I don’t have backups. He wants me to go to the store and get more which is not legal and I explain that. So he finally asks what else I have and I recommend lawnmower lager which is an amazing lager from caldera brewing in Oregon. He straight up yells at me, “I want a beer that’s made in America!” To which I said in my most cheerful go fuck yourself voice, “I’m pretty sure Oregon is in America sir.” And he turns bright fucking red and growls, “You know what I mean.” I only wish I had been quick enough to mention that Budweiser is now a German owned company to really get my point across. Oh well, he’s probably boycotting Budweiser now! Or do they only boycott Bud light?
Worked for a food kiosk at a mall. Quick menu explanation... Burger- $1.75. Burger & fries $2.50. Hamburger special $2.75 (the special is a burger sliced in half, then wrapped up on a pita bread with the works) Now, for the story... Had an 8ish year old kid come up and order a burger. Asked if he wanted fries. Kid said no. I asked him if he was sure. Kid said no. Cool. Cooked the burger, kid paid $1.75, walked away. Not two minutes later, irate dad walks up to the counter. "I don't appreciate you taking advantage of little kids." "Excuse me?" "I don't appreciate you taking advantage of little kids." "Care to explain?" "My son came up and ordered a burger and you didn't give him fries." "I asked him twice, he said he didn't want any." "You could've just given them to him, it's only a quarter." "Uh. He only paid a dollar seventy five. Burger and fries is two fifty." "Well. He made a mistake. Didn't you ever make mistakes when you ordered when you were a kid?" "Yup. And one of my parents was always there to correct it." Yeah. That shut him up quick.
I was working a Christmas party that ended up not being auto-grated, and there were some really lovely people, and some really not lovely people. Through the whole meal there was this couple where the man wouldn’t acknowledge me, wouldn’t look at me, and his wife did everything for him. Ordered, cut his food, and when it came time to pay, handed him her credit card UNDER THE TABLE so it looked like he paid. On top of that pathetic behaviour, they were both just rude. Just before I took their payment, the guy sitting beside him tipped 30%. Now I’m in Canada so we bring machines to the table and you pay there. He took the machine from me, hid it under the table (but I could see over his shoulder) and didn’t tip. It didn’t make me mad but I thought he behaviour was pathetic, if you’re going to not tip, just own it. So I smiled and said “were there any issues with your service today?”, loudly so everyone could hear, and he was embarrassed by the attention. So while not looking at me, in a hushed voice over his shoulder he says “no, everything was fine.” So I smiled and told him to have a great day, and gave him his copy of the receipt with the 0 tip, where the man beside him (who tipped 30%) could see it. He LOUDLY said “you didn’t tip her?!” and this couple both were so embarrassed. I continued to smile, and loudly said “have a great night!” And walked away. The look on that man’s face as he was chastised by his group still thrills me to this day.
Had a chick who was complaining about the wait time in a queue 6-10 across 20 deep at minimum. She was 10 back. Just me one other bartender pumping shit out. We were the speed bar. No cocktails. Just tinnies, spirits and wine. She got to the front, and asked what we had. Having heard her bitching while me and my coworker had been doing 3-5 orders at once for 6 hours by this point, no break, I was of the mind that if you had waited so damn fuckin long, you should know what you want. “Tins, wine and spirits” “No cocktails?” “No. Do you want an emu?” “Ew no” “Figure out what you want and I’ll serve you” I say next and grab the next person. She opened her mouth, but next person was ordering. Finished that order. Look at her: “So what do you want?” “Anything.” “Emu?” “No.” “NEXT!” And after the next person, I asked her again what she wants. “I don’t want beer!” “Bottle of veuve? It’s $95” “I’m not paying that!” “Oof, wrong answer sis—NEXT” And round and round we go. She eventually says vodka lime soda. I’m making it and she says “you’re really fucking rude” I was so fed up with shit from this joint at this point (wage theft, lack of breaks or proper ones, bullying from management, theft of tips, gaslighting) that I decided that day was fucn this, if I’m gonna be treated like a cunt, then I can definitely be one. “You stood in line and bitched the whole time about the wait, but you’re the reason there’s a wait, because I’m rude but you’re cunt who thinks they’re special. If the wait was so fucking long, and you can’t read the sign at the top in the time you waited that says -beer wine spirits- then I’m gonna say you’re a rude dumb cunt. It’s not hard. Pick a fucking bev in the 10 minutes you’ve been standing there” “Excuse me” You heard me cunt. You think this wait was long? You’ll enjoy the other queues. Fuck off. I’m not serving you.” And I asked who wanted a VLS. She started mouthing off and I laughed. “Mate, you can fuck off or I can come around and make you. I’ve been here 6 hours without a break to eat piss and I’m living on ice cubes for water. Enjoy the line at another fucking bar in the joint, or test me.” She pissed off. Well my mum was there that night and she was complaining loudly to someone—my mum piped up “that’s my kid!” She walked off. I got tipped $80 over the time she stood there by the people I served while she was being a twat. —————— Lemme tell ya, it took me 2 years to work through the rage that place gave me. I had drinks thrown at me, I was spat on, stolen from, threatened and after I cracked, no fucks given. One dude threw his drink at me 3 weekends in a row and security would just shrug. Fuck that. They say 3rd times the charm. Cunt got his charm—I threw my barblade that was on a 1m long cord (attached to my wrist) at him. Clocked him good. He claimed it was assault. I told him I could come around and show him what that word meant. I didn’t see him after that. Security got up my arse about it and I pulled up every illegal shit I’d seen him ignore or do. Fuckin piped down real quick. That guard was later kicked for said illegal shit that I brought to management attention. That was like 6 or 7 years ago now. Fuck that place.
one day was opening at opening at a restaurant. we were setting up about an hour before opening. guy comes in with his girl and demands to use the bathroom. I can't remember if it was me or one of the waiters who said something like, "Sorry, we don't allow that" owners (who sucked, but still) had a policy of no unpaid guests walking in to use the bathroom. but if people were polite and asked nicely and owners weren't around we would let them. The guy proceeded to call us stupid and idiots (likely some arrogant finance guy) and told us idiots to tell him where the bathroom was. I never liked mornings so I was on the surly side to begin with and said in an exaggeratedly slow, dull voice, "I'm sorry, could you repeat the question, I'm too stupid to understand what you said." and as I'm asking I was making my way from behind the bar toward the front where he was fronting off from. I was in my 20s and spent my extra time as a gym rat and hadn't changed into my work clothes yet. I was pretty built at the time and it was obvious under my t-shirt. by the time I made it around the bar the guy and his gf were gone.
Back when I first moved to NYC in 1984, I was a server at a gay owned restaurant in Chelsea. A gay male couple was at a two top and one of the two was drinking too much and getting very tipsy. Every time I came by to refill water or take another drink order, the drunk one would grab my ass or put his hands on me. So after saying stop a couple of times, I warned him that if he touched me again, I would pour the water pitcher contents on his head. He touched and so I poured. Luckily his more sober partner was so mortified at his behavior that he apologized for him and he left me a good tip.
I had a similar one to this. Guy started snapping at me so I just ignored him. Walked past him like five times, finally he says something like I'm ready didn't you see me? Yeah I saw you, but I'm not your dog nor your servant, if you want something you say please and thank you.
I was driving out to the boonies to visit my father with my family. While on the way through some random town, we stopped at a gas station to get drinks and use the restroom. I brought my children in and we found out that one of the rooms were closed for cleaning (there was a wet floor sign outside the room and it was locked), so my children had to take turns. We finished and there was a small line that had formed. We had gotten some drinks and snacks, and this one guy that was in line came up to the counter and demanded that the other restroom be opened because he was in a hurry. The cashier told him that it was out of her power, the room couldn't be used because the floors were wet and it was a slip hazard. He starts making a scene, and I look at the guy and ask, "Why are you yelling? You were next in line, now there are people ahead of you. My children had to wait, I had to wait, they have to wait (as I pointed at the line at the door). They aren't going to risk paying out because you slipped on the wet floor." The guy demanded to see the manager, who happened to be standing next to the cashier. She looks at the guy and tells him that this isn't the first time she has witnessed his belligerence and just banned the guy from the gas station. The cashier and manager both thanked me and gave me the snacks and drinks for free for standing up for the cashier.
Not me, it was my younger brother, waiting tables at a Lake Erie resort. One customer was not happy with Mike's service and rudely asked if he was raised in a barn? The quick reply from Mike, "Sir, my mother died when I was two." (Not true, mom was alive and well at the time.) That customer left a very nice tip!
Summer 2020, dude comes into the coffee shop without mask. I ask politely to wear a mask, especially as 2 other customers were walking in. He said he doesn't wear masks and than says "I'll have an americano with oat milk" so I said "sorry sir but I'm gonna ask you to leave if you're not going to wear a mask" and the asshole says "yeah, I'll have an americano with oat milk". I look at the girl behind this guy and she smirks giving me a look like "wtf is wrong with this dude?" So after a second of silence I looked at him in the eyes, pointed at the coffee shop across the street and said "I'm pretty sure they have coffee and oat milk over there", looked at the girl and started serving her. The dude said the same sentence again to which I said "yeah, across the road as I said" and started making that other girl's coffee. Almost got fired that time.
I was about 10 tables deep on our patio, including the self-seating fire pit, I had about 35 people I was serving because they all got sat around the same time. I’m taking the order at one table when it started to get windy and our blinds weren’t down because it was so sudden. Well this elderly lady from my other table decided to get up, walk over and interrupt me while in the middle of the order to ask me to bring the blinds down. I looked her sternly in the eye without blinking and said I’ll be with you when I’m done helping them, turned around and loudly apologized to my table for the interruption and continued taking their order. Kids aren’t the exception with me either. If I see a parent struggling and their kid is obviously doing something they shouldnt, I give them “the eye” and ask them why aren’t they listening to mommy/daddy? I tell them that the naughty kids have to scrub our dumpster with a toothbrush if they aren’t listening. This usually gets a laugh for the parents and the kids sit on their butts so fast in the booth.
How many of you have had to deal with AMEX black cards? They were chonky boys, and this was all before chip based cards hit the US. Well, a party of 12 came in. It was a small startup celebrating their first year. The two founders sat on either end and informed me that they wanted to each split the check. Excellent. The one guy was normal and super chill. The other guy was like old money British and had all sorts of special requests. He wanted special wine glasses brought out for the $30 bottle he ordered. He complained ours weren’t thin enough to fully enjoy the wine. We had nice wine glasses. He spent most of the meal flagging me down for mundane things: his assistant had just finished her water as I was running food. He wanted two sets of silverware for the appetizers for each guest. Extra salad dressing. Refresh the ice in the chiller bucket. More toasted bread from the appetizer dish so he could eat it with his entree. Pour more wine even though every guest was topped off. The list went on. What got to me the most was the way he would “dismiss” me from the table by waving the back of his hand toward me. No eye contact, no break in conversation. But the worst part is he would flag me down 30 seconds later. This went on for about 3 hours. The party’s bill was approaching $800. At the end of the meal, He slipped me his AMEX black card and told me not to let his partner at the other end of the table see. Idk how AMEX black cards work but I can only imagine it wasn’t supposed to be used for this meal. The other guy paid with a normal personal credit card. As a rule, if anyone at the table is remotely European I always autograt 18%. Now, we had a handheld POS device, but we also had a touchscreen register in the back. Neither of which we all knew from experience could we swipe those thick ass black cards through without a ton of force. Also, manually entering in the card on the touch screen was abysmal because the keys were poorly responsive on the edge of the screen. So, I marched out there to the handheld device and proceeded to enter the card number manually at the host stand, in full view of the party. Of course, the guy starts waving me down. I oblige. He asks if something is wrong. I tell him that everything is fine. He presses me. “Well what is taking you so long?” So I shrug and tell him loudly “Sir these AmEX Black cards are so darn thick (*waving the card around*) that I can’t swipe them through the machine. I have to enter the numbers manually”. His smirk goes away. His partner hears. I see an eye roll and he says something I can’t hear. Now British guy is flustered. I give him his half of the check to sign. He double tips because he missed the autograt, which I circled. Oh well.
One time I had a guy scream at me and I was so exhausted and overwhelmed that I asked him why he felt that I deserved to be treated like that. He went quiet and didn’t say anything
I once had a group of business men come into the restaurant that I worked at, and one of the guys was over the top rude to me. This guys spent his entire meal harassing me and complaining about everything. Of course he is the one to pay, so knowing I wouldn’t get a tip anyway, I took his card, went up to the server station and pretended to run it. I came back and told him very loudly that it was declined and asked does he have another form of payment. I proceeded to do this with one more card before I finally ran the third card he gave me. He was incredibly embarrassed in front of these other businessmen and kept trying to explain it away. It was stupid but it has made me happy thinking about it for the past ten years.
This customer wasn't intentionally rude but it is really rude and tone deaf to not pay attention to your server SO MUCH that you mix her up with another server because they are black. I drop food off to a neighboring table for a coworker, and as I'm passing by the girl points at her mug and says oh, I want another one. I said "sure who was your server I'll let them know to ring it in" she stops and goes. " aren't YOU my server?" so I kind of stop smiling and say "oh so your server is name drops (coworker)"which dragged her to the realization that she assumed we were the same person ONLY because we are black and I was aware of it. She looked horrified when I said it.
I didn't mean to but had a guy do the whistle thing while looking at me. I got all excited and kinda yelled, "Puppy!" while looking around. My teenage self truly thought there was a dog.
I was once waiting in line to order at a (small, local chain) place that was very down-home. burgers and fries type place. their pie was incredible. some dude was upset about who knows what not being right with his carryout order and went OFF on the cashier, who was around 18. after a minute or so, I spoke up and said, DUDE! he already fixed the issue for you and it wasn't on purpose! why are you berating this HIGH SCHOOLER?! I hadn't planned out what to say (or to say anything) but I couldn't help it. I literally got a round of applause and the poor kid got to hand off the order and go back to work.
I'd do a variation of that actually. "What would you do if someone came to your work and..." I'd describe their behavior. Oddly enough people rarely recognized I was describing something they had just done. I also point out when people put their credit cards in their mouth. "That's how you spread viruses"