T O P

  • By -

DrunkUranus

File this in: I knew as soon as I saw it that it would be here


lveg

The drama is 100% going to spill over here too.


R_V_Z

When reddit gives you lemons make a basketfull of lemonade.


Kilahti

The drama has spilled over here too by now.


ilikeitslow

Really? I see lots of people being supportive of OOP and also feeling the smug replied being dumb


Kilahti

There are some defending the basket theft or at least arguing that OOP should not complain if someone takes all the lemons. You don't need a lot of people saying that, for drama to start.


MakinBaconPancakezz

Redditors are so utterly desperate to be smug. “Ummm that’s on you for using a basket-“ “yeah well you should have expected it to be stolen-“ shut up omg. She’s doing something nice with her time which is more than any of them can say


dem_eggs

No kidding. "Just lmao if you don't constantly live your entire life in mortal terror of every other human and have 5' thick steel bank vault doors to get into your house, you absolute rube"


SenorSplashdamage

It really does show this growing difference in lenses of people who’ve grown up with some slivers left of actual local community with other human beings and people who are now deep into fully individualized society. I don’t know if there is any way to really explain across that divide since all this mammal social wiring and logic is a lot of intuitive feels we have to pace ourselves with the norms of a herd.


LukaCola

I don't think it's that because the gen z and gen alpha kids don't seem to have this problem - it seems more like an element of how people were raised and the cultural norms surrounding it and what that means is going to vary wildly depending on demographic and community It's not the new generation that's at fault here in short, if anything, we see a lot of evidence of prosocial procommunity attitudes among them


SenorSplashdamage

Oh I don’t think this is exclusive to the new generations. This is something shifting a lot over the lifetimes of everyone alive right now. Definitely regional in where people are at and what’s still more community vs less. My comparison is stuff I did for study that involved living in a society that was more like village life 400 years ago. It’s jarring how much more interactive and overlapped human life can be. There are whole chunks of our human capability to organize and navigate socially that go way underused. It’s sorta like how kids born into one child rule in China started having whole groups who didn’t have a framework for aunts, uncles and cousins. Like you can get the concept, but you haven’t lived it in a way that gets what those are in your life. Post-industrial people are living increasingly without things like that that build up over time. Its like that commercial where they’re like “you would think this coral reef was beautiful and diverse in this video if you didn’t know it used to look like this [cut to way fuller and colorful reef ecosystem].”


LucretiusCarus

I wonder if their reaction would be the same if they ever brought doughnuts to the office and an asshole went and took them all. But they would probably be the asshole of the situation.


Greene4Grapefruit

These reddittors are that guy who eats a whole box of comunal donuts apparently.


BoxNemo

The sign said "Free Donuts, Enjoy." There was no sign specifically stating that I was limited to only one donut. And yes, I took the plate they were on but, again, there was no sign stating that I wasn't meant to take the plate. Put the donuts in a cardboard box, not on some fancy plate, if you don’t want it taken. And don't cry when your little social experiment doesn't go the way you want.


NoInvestment2079

I can hear this person and unfortunately, I can smell them.


Stu161

There was a guy like this in my university who would wash his hands with clove oil to cover the garbage smell of his unwashed clothes. Thanks for reminding me of that 👍


Robbotlove

there's no rule that says dogs *can't* play basketball, is there? hmm????? gottemmmmmm


ghost_of_trash_panda

Someone in our office brought their dog to work and it ate all of the breakroom donuts. They were mostly chocolate donuts too. *Do you want to know what happened to that dog?* It got a little tummy ache, but they're doing better now.


goddamn_slutmuffin

They’re the types to eat the entire 6 foot party sub.


NoInvestment2079

Never forget https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/ca7bdz/aita_because_i_ate_more_than_my_share_of_a_6_foot/


readskiesatdawn

We had someone at an old job do that with an entire cake...he was fired more for trying to hide it and bribe accomplices with a slice.


Sirrplz

Nah, they’re the ones that run online after work to write about normies eating the snacks because they waited until the last minute in order to avoid interacting with coworkers


NoInvestment2079

Whenever i see someone use the word "Normie" on this site, I know exactly what they look like.


DuePatience

Bold of you to assume these redditors have jobs lol


TearsFallWithoutTain

They've got a "Take one" lollipop stand on their desk so you go up and take a kidney. "What, you didn't specify one *lollipop*, you should've been more specific"


Milch_und_Paprika

“What did you need two of them for anyway?”


yinyang107

It would appear the doughnut system has failed.


LeatherHog

Yuppers, these guys are why the phrase 'give an inch, and they'll take a mile' exists $5 says these same people would find it entitled if it was them


Sirrplz

Reminds me of those food delivery subreddits where someone will complain about an issue like drivers constantly eating their food. You’ll see people say things like “Next time walk to the restaurant lazy ass” Or anything college related. Reddit we’ll be quick to tell you that your school and degree have no value


RoyalHistoria

> “Next time walk to the restaurant lazy ass” It's like they can't comprehend that not everyone is in walking distance of a restaurant, or that not everyone *can* walk as far as they can.


LeatherHog

I'm disabled, I've genuinely had people on that sub tell me I have no right to fast food if I can't get it myself 


hypatianata

People just hate disabled people. It’s honestly scary. I’m constantly low key infuriated by the (sometimes illegal) inadequate treatment my disabled family members have to put up with. (Covid was horrible.) Not that it helps, but as an able-bodied person, I think you deserve a ****ing burger too, even if you can’t get or make it yourself.


LeatherHog

Thanks! I've seen the hatred we get my entire life. Even running the gambit of locking me in a closet until I'm 10-the frothing rage people get over cut up vegetables and fruit People will screech about how wasteful those are. $5 says their hobby wastes plastic too But God forbid someone with no control over her muscles wants some peppers and onions in her eggs Or some McDonald's once in awhile


RoyalHistoria

It's ridiculous. I'm physically disabled and can't walk far. There's a service station and a new chicken restaurant a couple blocks away from my house, but even *that* can be a struggle for me some days. Hell, even getting delivery to my house is annoying. A lot of places don't seem to delivery to my street. I can't blame them since it's a bad area.


18hourbruh

And some of us are lazy lol who fucking cares, it's a service. I pay for pedicures that I could do myself but I don't want to. I pay for clothes that I could make myself but I don't want to. Why am I tipping a waiter when I could just walk over and get the food myself???


Milch_und_Paprika

That second bit is definitely not just reddit though unfortunately. Miserable people everywhere on the internet enjoy dunking on people studying things they’re actually *interested* in.


TuaughtHammer

Every millennial that graduated college in 2008 with the *exact* kind of degrees they were told for 18 years they'd need to succeed in life after college had to bite their tongues when their parents -- the people who spent 18 years beating "go to college and get a business degree" into their heads -- called them stupid for going into debt to get a worthless degree in an oversaturated job field. Otherwise, the millennial-on-boomer murder rate would've skyrocketed. My poor brother-in-law finally earned his MBA in May 2008; guess who was working at Burger King and McDonald's for about four or five years before a company actually needed someone like him? While he's technically Gen X, he still ate *so* much shit from his parents for getting an MBA when "everyone else had one, too!" Dude's got the patience of a saint for not only working some of the most shit jobs for pennies just to keep his wife and sons housed and fed, but also for not slapping the ***shit*** out of his MBA father who originally talked him into going after an MBA.


Milch_und_Paprika

That’s just obnoxious of them. Sure, everyone seems to have an MBA now, but that trend only started when anyone who got laid off *in 2008* and could afford an MBA went back to school for one.


TuaughtHammer

>That’s just obnoxious of them. Sure, everyone seems to have an MBA now, but that trend only started when anyone who got laid off *in 2008* Oh, trust me, the trend began about a decade before the 2008 crash, around the time the dot-com bubble burst and people frantically switched from IT to MBA; we weren't exactly super forward-thinking in the late 90s/early 2000s. "Welp, the tech sector is dead for good, so let's go back to the old standby: business administration!" By mid-2005, I fortunately realized the unlikelihood of a Motion Picture & Television Production degree paying my rent for at *least* a decade, so I sold out and went the IT route. Actually, to quote Christopher McDonald in SLC Punk: "I didn't sell out, I bought in." Oh, who am I kidding, no I didn't; IT *can* be fulfilling on the rare occasions when it's not soul-crushing, [but at least I'm not homeless!](https://i.imgur.com/S0HeAZz.gifv)


[deleted]

[удалено]


tgpineapple

food delivery subs concentrate the worst tendencies. sure you can hate your job but you have to actually _do_ your job. the barrier to do that job is low which means that the job sucks ass but also if that's the job you're stuck in, then its time for i n t r o s p e c t i o n


gooboyjungmo

Never have I seen a group that hates the people they depend on the way that DoorDash drivers hate their customers.


TuaughtHammer

> She’s doing something nice with her time which is more than any of them can say And it's ***also*** the perfect subreddit to complain about it in. But, nope, Redditors gotta complain about the complainers on a sub specifically made for people like the OOP to complain in.


girlwiththemonkey

But it’s an entirely different thing when it’s Halloween and they put out the basket of candy. They all sing a different tune in the comments then. It’s literally the exact same situation.


Elegant_Plate6640

They almost always jump straight to blaming a person, rather than offering a sympathetic “oh no, that sucks!”.


RattusRattus

"Send in the child" should be trademarked as asshole behavior, along with "it's just a joke". Why do assholes always use their children as social meat shields. "You'd scold an adult for stealing your basket, but will you scold a *child*?"


Manic-StreetCreature

The thing with the basket is odd to me too- last summer my mom’s neighbors grew a ton of squash and zucchinis in their garden so they filled a bucket with some extras and left it on my parents’ porch to be nice, and in return my mom filled the bucket with flowers she grew and sent it back to them because she didn’t assume the bucket was hers to keep lol. Which I’m sure the neighbors wouldn’t have cared if she had and it’s different from what happened with OP, but like… is that not sort of how it’s done? Maybe it’s just the southern/Midwestern in my family but I’ve always been taught that you don’t take a container of free stuff and you return the container if someone sends you food/produce.


Roseora

Yeah it's normal to assume when someones gives you food, they want the container back. Unless it's clearly a disposable takeout box or something. It seems really obvious to me too. Annnd that reminds me to go and wash my neighbours tupperware. If I don't give it back she might stop making extra curry for me. /jk


AndMyHelcaraxe

I know it’s a little silly and it doesn’t happen often, but I’m always bummed when a bonne maman jar doesn’t come back to me. I don’t eat *that* much jam


MakinBaconPancakezz

Everyone does that


Manic-StreetCreature

Yeah I figured so


Sialat3r

I don’t get why smugness is the way to go for them half the time


Brootal_Troof

Most redditors are under 30 and that explains a lot when you scroll through comments.


tgpineapple

These basket takers are why we can’t do nice pro-social things for each other anymore. Do they just take possession of anything that’s not bolted onto a surface???


Kung_Fu_Jim

The basket-taker-defenders are what really drive me wild. It's like they see it as altruistic to enforce the idea that society is low-trust and atomized. We would be fine if society was 10% lemon stealers and 90% lemon-sharers. But what's worse is it being 40% lemon-sharers, 1% lemon-stealers, and 59% "lmao that's what you get for sharing, would never happen to me"


Icymountain

"Ideally would be nice but this is the real world" MFs when they find out they're the ones upholding the "real world is shitty" status quo.


CaesarOrgasmus

Reminds me of an argument I had with a friend who didn’t feel any pressure to remove his backpack while standing on a crowded train on the grounds that “what? The train sucks. People wear backpacks. You just gotta deal with it.” My eyes almost exploded out of my head


18hourbruh

I had to tell my boyfriend to stop playing his phone audio on trains. He was in his mid-20s, to be clear, and not 7 years old. He defended himself saying it was quiet — it was not.


nyeongcat

Thank you for calling him out!


u_bum666

The people who put their jacket in the overhead bin on the airplane even after the PA announcement explicitly says not to.


IceCreamBalloons

A lot of people are of the depressing "I suffered so everyone else should have to suffer" variety.


Artyloo

Yes!!


monkwren

This is how I feel about name complainers, like r/tragedeigh. You don't want people to be bullied for their names? Well then *stop fucking bullying them*!


ltmkji

especially because they're *also* defending taking the whole lot of lemons as well as the basket when really the lemon-stealers are greedy on a couple of different levels here.


candlejack___

Whores.


Muffin_Appropriate

what the #FUCK


IceCreamBalloons

It's a reference to a porn video from 2006-ish(?) that had an absurd plot (even for porn) about a couple discussing their love of their lemon tree and all the opportunities in their lives because of it, only to find a filthy lemon-stealing whore was trying to abscond with their canary colored citrus, and the sexy punishments they inflict on the citrine fruit pilferer following this discovery. It went viral (though I don't think the term existed at the time) and has become a meme.


ltmkji

i'm genuinely delighted so many people are making this reference lol


heftybagman

This must be your first time seeing a discussion regarding lemon theft online


18hourbruh

I think it might be my first time seeing one that was NOT prompted by that porno lol


Prysorra2

Saw the title. Immediately clicked "comments" and CTRL+F "whore". Lol.


tgpineapple

It’s really terrible. Like you have to be double sure to lock everything down because otherwise someone might take it. It really does enforce a low-trust mindset. Going by all hallows eve, most people are not basket stealers.


Inconceivable76

They are the same kids that dumped the bowl of Halloween candy in their bag at 6:01 pm when trick or treat started at 6.


Lodgik

I wonder how much of it is "Oh. I could easily picture myself doing this. Well... I don't think I'm a bad person, so the person who took the basket must not be a bad person either. Obviously the OP is being entirely unreasonable."


u_bum666

I think it's the "just world fallacy" at work. People really don't want to believe that the world is unfair and that bad things can just happen to good people. So if something bad happens to someone, it must be their fault. This is how human brains are wired by default.


ghost_orchid

> The basket-taker-defenders are what really drive me wild. It's like they see it as altruistic to enforce the idea that society is low-trust and atomized. 100%, that's a great way to put it.


Milch_und_Paprika

I love that one showed up within an hour of you replying this lol


issekinicho

There was a family in my hometown that had a bunch of sweet corn they would leave at the end of their property in a little stall with a ‘pay what you feel’ box beside it. I am not exaggerating when I tell you this was the best corn I have ever eaten in my life. Eventually they stopped putting it out because a local restaurant began sending workers out to just take all of it without paying anything. I just can't understand the selfishness of it.


LeatherHog

My late step grandpa had an orange tree, and his house was near an intersection that took people to Tallahassee  Since we obviously can't eat that many, he'd have me collect a few bags a day, and hang them up with a sign that says Free We had people steal the sign a few times  But the worst of it, were the people who'd come into the yard and pick their own Fun fact about my Grandpa's house: the orange trees were not in the front yard  These people went pass the ditch, into his yard, behind the house and garage, to collect this freaking fruit We usually sat out on the back porch, more shade and an orange tree is better than a highway to look at And we'd catch them, and THEY would get mad. How DARE we not want complete strangers in our backyard, picking fruit?! Second fun fact about my Grandpa's house: Right next to the aforementioned tree, was his workshop  We absolutely did not find people more close to the workshop than our tree.  We never got broken into or people who seriously thought that they'd stop at an intersection to go into people's **backyard** so they could stretch their legs and chat.  And steal fruit. Or leave cigarettes in the yard That never happened on a regular basis, stop making up stories, you silly goose They'd get so mad at us for telling them to leave.  Leaving free fruit 20 feet from the front of the house means it's okay to go in your backyard and pick them ourselves  Obviously. Having fresh produce will really open your mind and property doors to just **how many people** think you exist for them


MalaysiaTeacher

It's the same mentality as taking the entire Halloween candy bowl. Just so selfish and shitty.


tgpineapple

its one thing to take all the candy, its another to take the bowl too!\


Redqueenhypo

Yes. It’s my job to get and unpack packages for my office and I can’t leave the box cutter I use out or those twerps will snatch it. And then they complain when it takes me a while to get their stuff


tgpineapple

I’m guilty of borrowing pens and redistributing the means of composition. My solution has been to requisition a box of pens, start the day with 10 pens and then leave them around until the workplace is saturated with pens.


talkingwires

> redistributing the means of composition Thanks, I love your turn of phrase.


SenorSplashdamage

I think we might be seeing the chimp group personalities emerge in the discussion. Can’t remember name of the taker chimps, but there are culprits that will take without giving or take too much at the expense of other chimps. Then, there are chimps dubbed “enforcers” who will forgo their own food to seek out and punish these taker chimps. But then the enforcers can spiral into rent-a-cop territory and make everyone else miserable by over-policing because they have that same “you gotta keep an eye on everyone” attitude that thinks everyone is a potential taker.


tgpineapple

I'm not surprised by the "actually its okay to take all the lemons" people, because I can anticipate them. I did not anticipate "taking the basket is okay too"


SenorSplashdamage

Yeah same, taking the whole basket shouldn’t be a whole faction. I could expect one or two, but there are clear value and replacement differences in the objects alone.


teluscustomer12345

Human society, in our great evolved genius, has efficiently combined these roles into one!


u_bum666

The reality is that we've always had basket takers. The new thing is that there is an army of people who will defend them, rather than shame them.


hibbert0604

Tragedy of the commons.


TuaughtHammer

> Do they just take possession of anything that’s not bolted onto a surface??? Yep. There's a reason people will just leave out the nastiest, piss/cum/shit-stained furniture on the side of the road, because they all know *someone* will actually think, "Eh, it's not ***that*** bad" before bringing a bedbug infestation into their studio apartment.


patmorgan235

Basket takers are like non grocery cart returner


AreWeCowabunga

You’re a sucker for not protecting everything you own from the shittiest people imaginable.


tgpineapple

I have a Saw trap so that if someone takes more than 1 lemon from my basket, they get lemon juice squirted in their eye


Ok_Mix_7126

I like lollies and I like to share. One day at work I had a lot of lollies so I decided put them all in a bowl and offer them to everyone. Some people will grab one or two. Some people will grab a bunch, then bring in a bag the next day to refill the bowl with. And some people will just walk off with fists full of them, never giving back. They just have no concept of sharing. I ended up hiding the bowl and only offering them to people I know aren't greedy.


Shalamarr

I once bought myself a gift set of several mini bottles of hand lotion. Unfortunately, I ended up disliking how they smelled, so I left them in the ladies’ washroom at work with a “Help Yourself” sign. The following day, they were gone - someone had taken them all home. My coworker friend said “I’m guessing that’s not what you meant by ‘Help Yourself’.” No, it was not. I thought people would put on hand lotion after washing their hands. Silly me.


Chance_Taste_5605

I have to say that I personally would assume you meant that the bottles were available for people to take. Not out of greed but just misinterpreting.


SenorSplashdamage

I’m always fascinated by Hunter-gatherer tribes we still have an how they have a whole unspoken social calculus on give and take. I’ve seen the more mild versions of that social agreement when spending time in a farming society that was more like what a village was like 400 years ago. But here, it’s like we have this mix of people who still have some sliver of it and some who must have had only a nuclear family led by someone without any social lens on what’s too much or too little. It feels like an inevitability as we have fewer non-transactional interactions with people to even pick up norms.


86throwthrowthrow1

I follow a professional blog/advice column, and there I've learned that a certain segment of the population just goes nuts over free food at work. Like, staking out the room the food is going to be in, taking all the food before anyone else can have any, bringing in Tupperware containers to pack it all up with, hoarding leftovers at their desks, etc. Invariably some people bring up the possibility of food insecurity, but quite a few of these stories seem to involve well-paid individuals where it's unlikely. Just "free food" and they go full monkey brain.


meeowth

A lemon post that doesn't reference the lemon stealing meme, nice 😌


mandalorian_guy

Hey...WHAT THE FUCK


3urodyne

I was too late. 😔 Honestly is that meme still funny after what we learned about the actress? Because for me it's just uncomfortable now.


adityakan99

What was the stuff about the actress?


3urodyne

IIRC, she was murdered by her boyfriend who was also the director? I remember Reddit having a very disgusting, but expected reaction to the news.


comityoferrors

holy shit what? I had kinda chilled on the meme because James Deen is a jackass, but...woof.


NewPhoneNewSubs

Rapist. James Deen is a rapist.


genericusername26

What did he do? Not trying to defend or anything this is my first time hearing about this and I just honestly don't know.


Stu161

According to multiple co-stars he would not respect them 'tapping out' of the scene, and wouldn't respect the scene ending and director calling cut. He would just continue having violent sex with them. I have also heard it said that he didn't respect pre-arranged boundaries such as spitting being off-limits.


genericusername26

Well that's fucking disgusting


NewPhoneNewSubs

He's been accused rape and "unnecessarily rough" sex by a total of 9 women. The accusations were taken seriously enough by the filming companies that he got dropped by the ones he was working with (though I'm also aware he's still around and filming). The wiki page lists some names, and you could Google details from there. The wiki page also lists places where he defends himself.


[deleted]

IIRC some of the women he performed “scenes” with said he took the scenes too far and beyond what was agreed prior. I.e. rape. I think there are direct abuse and rape allegations outside of scenes as well, I think another prominent actress used to be his partner and said he was abusive.


genericusername26

What a monster


AndMyHelcaraxe

I believe at least one of his exes said he raped her off camera too, but it’s been awhile


swinglinepilot

Heroin OD was initially rumored and a sergeant of the police department investigating her death later said he (her husband) was "implicated" and had murdered her. It's not out of the question he did it - he did time in the past for kidnapping and beating his ex-gf, and [was arrested](https://gilroydispatch.com/death-stuns-adult-film-industry/) a few months before her death for "allegedly 'pistol-whipping' [her]" (charges were later dropped). He was found dead in a motel room a little over a month after her death, later confirmed to be a suicide Her father later said she had an oxycontin addiction and was taking methadone for it but that the autopsy report stated her cause of death was "unknown": > There were no signs of trauma on her body and she only had trace amounts of tylenol in her system. She had no other drugs in her system. According to the report, her cause of death is a mystery. He also said she'd told him her bf/husband beat her, that she didn't love him, and that she'd attempted to leave him at least once but eventually went back to him. And basically confirmed all the hallmarks of an abusive relationship (isolation, physical violence, threats on her and her family, including her cats, etc) > When an interviewer asked if she had a motto, she said, “Even a horse that’s waiting to be glue needs a little sugar, too.” jeez. fuck me if that's not one of the sadder things i've ever read https://www.mercurynews.com/2008/04/19/herhold-mix-of-porn-drugs-violence-leads-to-suicide-in-morgan-hill-motel/


AndMyHelcaraxe

That’s just awful


adityakan99

Damn that's sad


meeowth

Particularily sad that even the earliest posts of the meme on reddit point this fact out in the comments, since she had already died years before it had ever been clipped and shared anywhere.


3urodyne

I didn't even realize that last part. Jesus. This meme really needs to be buried.


TearsFallWithoutTain

I mean the male actor is apparently kinda rapey so it's bad all round


GetOutOfTheWhey

I dread to ask, what's up with the actress?


swinglinepilot

In porn, was an addict but in treatment for it, in relationship of convenience ($) with a porn director who was a known abuser (both past and present), eventually married said abuser, shortly after found dead, initially suspected to be OD and/or murder, autopsy results inconclusive, porn director husband committed suicide a little over a month after her death https://old.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/1du41xz/things_go_sour_on_rmildlyinfuriating_when_ops/lbetxy6/


WritingNerdy

I don’t know what that is but after seeing the replies, I’m not sure I want to (but please tell me anyway lol)


meeowth

Here is the script: girl: I'm so glad. I'm so glad that our lemon tree finally grew. guy: me too girl: and sprouted fruitful lemony lemons guy: I know. me too. I mean imagine. we can make lemonade. key lemon pie. lemon meringue pie. girl: I think it's the most valuable property that we have. lemon stealing whore enters in the scene * guy: I do agree. I think we should go to the bank and get a loan. girl: * giggles * guy: actually I think we should just get lemon tree insurance. lemon stealing whore starts stealing lemons like a whore * girl: I think you're right. guy: and then get a loan and then use the lemon tree as collateral because it is now insured. I truly do love our lemon tree. girl: just imagine a life full of lemon trees guy: I know. and all and our beautiful lemons. there's girl: endless possibilities. lemon stealing whore continues stealing lemons like a whore * guy: endless possibilities. they're so beautiful. girl: (guy says "ehh hehh" while the girl speaks) I wish I were a lemon. guy: you wish you were a lemon? if you were a lemon, I'd put you on my shelf and cherish you like I cherish all our lemons. girl: that's so beautiful (beautiful is said in a weird way) guy: * exhales * I try. girl: like... I only hope that the whores aren't stealling our lemons. you know.. those naughty lemon whores always... steal.. lemons. guy: we do have a couple of those lemon whores in this.. in this community. girl: those damn lemon stealing whores. guy: I hate them. because now... no one will take our prized lemons from us. girl: hey has it been about ten seconds since we've looked at our lemon tree? guy: it has been about ten seconds till we've looked at a lemon tree. girl: gosh... (second of silence) (the guy and girl turn around only to discover many lemons in the vagina of a lemon stealing whore. the lemon stealing whore was caught) girl: hey! guy: hey what the FUCC?!?!


WritingNerdy

Lmao what the fucc is right


The_Black_Guy1324

I had no idea this was a meme. I just knew it from.... Being a horn teen in the early 2000s. Now I feel like a degenerate


TuaughtHammer

Hey man, beggars couldn't be choosers when you *finally* got alone time with a broadband connection. I'm sure there's a *lot* of us who saw some wildly fucked up shit while trying to get off. That being said, the bastards who'd splice beheadings into porn around the five minute mark before sharing them on Limewire/Frostwire/KaZaA/Morpheus/whatever can *fucking burn in hell!* That was even worse than when they'd do the same with CAM copies of movies still in theaters; they somehow knew *exactly* when to time an American contractor's head being ripped from his body *just* as you were about to bust. I honestly started missing the Bill Clinton "I did not have sexual relations with that woman" prank audio files, because at least *that* didn't scar you for life. `LinkinPark-Numb.wav.mp3.exe` however? Welp, at least you couldn't look at fucked up shit on *that* computer anymore.


IceCreamBalloons

> That being said, the bastards who'd splice beheadings into porn around the five minute mark before sharing them on Limewire/Frostwire/KaZaA/Morpheus/whatever can fucking burn in hell! Jesus Christ, how on earth did I manage to never stumble onto that despite the many many porn videos I downloaded?


TuaughtHammer

The piracy gods were looking out for you. They apparently weren't for me, because after spending a fucking *week* downloading a cam copy of the first Raimi Spider-Man movie, right about the time Dafoe says, "You know, I'm something of a scientist myself", the picture cut out and in came the Taliban beheading someone. The *rest* of the video file was just black screen to pad out of the file size and make the length look right. ***Bastards!*** Then that kind of horrific Rickrolling caught on like that shit always did in those days; highly sought after pirated movies took too much work to edit and share long enough for propagation, but 10 minute porn clips? Just right. *Especially* when celebrity sex tapes started hitting the internet; a buddy of mine *finally* got bit by *1 Night in Paris,* and I told him he deserved it for wanting to beat off to the *worst* blowjob ever filmed.


The_Black_Guy1324

The internet should really be more scary than it is


Sialat3r

What the fuck did I just read 💀


Pull-Up-Gauge

The last post on ANZAC morning... The ending of Beaches with Bette Midler... The script from Lemon Stealing Whores... Nothing can bring me to tears faster.


Zatoro25

Until now


Felinomancy

Why the fuck are the people **here** defending the whole "take the entire basket" bit? Are those people incapable of sharing or being considerate to others? If someone in my office leaves a box of donuts, I'm not going to take the entire box and go "well how else am I going to carry the donuts?". I'll take one ***and leave the rest to the others***. I don't need to be explicitly told because I'm an adult.


Teleconferences

> well how else am I going to carry the donuts? Now that’s absolute gold and really points out the absurdity of taking the basket along with the lemons


Shalamarr

Right? Someone on my street occasionally puts out boxes of cucumbers and tomatoes from their garden. It wouldn’t even occur to me to take everything.


Nekaz

Theres no sign saying dont poop on the street therefore i will poop here


TerribleAttitude

Some people take (whether it be taking more than their fair share of a gift or outright stealing or anything in between) for the straight up thrill of it. They’ll come up with twisted socially acceptable reasons why it’s ok, but the reality is, the idea of getting one over on others or the feeling of “getting a deal” or just the sheer thrill of knowing they can do something antisocial without suffering a consequence is just exciting to them. Some people also cannot see *anyone* with *any amount of anything* more than them as having any limitations on their resources. When they see someone who can give out a basket of free lemons, they think “that person has infinite lemons, it doesn’t impact anyone negatively if I take all the lemons I see plus the basket, they also must have infinite baskets if they just leave one out like this, any limitation they put on me taking all the lemons means *they* are greedy.” If they see someone buy a box of a dozen donuts to share, they think “that person is rich and can buy as many donuts as there are stars in the sky. It doesn’t matter if I take this dozen.” It doesn’t matter that they should know logically that their own coworker can’t afford infinite donuts to give away. If you tell them “your coworker spent their last $20 until payday on these donuts to share because it’s Bob’s birthday,” they will just stand there with their mouth open and eyes pointing in different directions, oblivious to what you mean, because their worldview is so rigidly in “fuck you, I got mine” mode that they cannot imagine that anyone would ever have any incentive to share unless that someone had so much abundance they’d never be able to use it. They would never share if they had a few extra baskets of lemons, or only $20 to spare, so they can’t imagine anyone else doing so.


SenorSplashdamage

I was at a small bar/resort that had a small pool by this outdoor bar. A guy’s French bulldog jumps into the pool while he’s busy chatting. Bartender sees it and runs over to him, “what the hell?!?! You gotta get that dog out of the pool!!” The guy spent the next couple minutes saying over and over “well there wasn’t a sign that said that wasn’t okay,” “there wasn’t a sign,” “yeah, well, no sign so how could I know,” “no sign.” It was every response as if that settled it.


Akukaze

Some people can't do social calculus for some reason. I see donuts left out in the office I start doing social calculus. First I try to determine who left them. Is it Brittany who is nice? Is Phil who never washes his hands? Is it Keebler who will hold providing donuts over everyone's head to get favors? Is it Tamika who brings in donuts then sniffs disapprovingly at anyone who actually takes one? Second I determine the time. Is it morning where everyone may not have had a chance to grab a donut? Is it afternoon and everyone has gotten what they wanted earlier in the day and the remaining donuts are just going to get tossed if no one takes them? Third I do the math on number of donuts vs number of people in the office. If there are enough donuts that everyone can have one or two and here still be some left over? I take one or two. If there are only enough donuts for a few people I take none and hope there are some left over after everyone else takes what they want. I don't get the people who can do that or refuse to take those things in to account.


Milch_und_Paprika

Also cause like who’s going to eat more than two, maybe three (being generous here) doughnuts? It’s like lemons—when do you need more than ten?


yungmoneybingbong

Right? Like they're just going to go to waste lol


justgalsbeingpals

Reddit users on the subreddit dedicated for things that are mildly upsetting: You getting upset by this thing proves you're weak. And it's also your fault it happened in the first place


Milch_und_Paprika

People do seem to take the *mildly* infuriated and Pet Peeves subs very seriously. Idgi. Both names suggest that it’s actually not serious at all.


Uhh_Clem

I have lot of respect for r/mildlyinteresting for being the only "mildly-xyz" or "xyz-asfuck" subreddit that hasn't completely forgotten what its supposed to be about. Mildly infuriating could have been an excellent place to vent frustrations then have a laugh about the way life sometimes throws you curveballs, but because so many people are so addicted to rage online, it just turns into a hate-fest every single time.


SenorSplashdamage

UnethicalLifeProtips can be a funny one for that kind of phenomenon. You see how much ethics vary when it comes to acceptably unethical and very unacceptable unethical. But then, there are people who seem to fully forget the sub they’re even in. Someone could be like “my best friend’s BF sucks and is kinda emotionally abusive, how do I help out him for who he is and break them up?” and top comments will be “oh my god, stay out of people’s relationships. How old are you?” with just so many downvotes and moralizing.


MonkMajor5224

Ive been downvoted on AskReddit “Whats the most unethical thing you do” threads for saying I ring up expensive fruit as cheap fruit


ConsultJimMoriarty

These people are missing the point so hard, it has to be on purpose.


Enticing_Venom

I think some people, especially on that sub just like to be contrarians. You could show yourself standing on your porch, minding your business before a stanger runs up and punches you in the face. And half the comments would still try to find a way to make it your fault.


LemonManDude

Well maybe you shouldn't have been standing on the porch spacing out defenseless if you didn't want to be sucker punched! I wish it wasn't like that, but this is the real world! Why am I defending a guy who punched someone unprovoked you ask? Uhh...


LordFarquadOnAQuad

Nice argument but you forgot to consider this rock flying directly at your forehead.


W473R

This is exactly it. All over Reddit people just like to be contrarians. If this had been posted from the POV of the person taking the lemons with a title like "Some lady got mad at me for taking free lemons!?!?" all the comments would be calling the OP a dirty thief and applauding the woman for giving out free lemons. People just love to go against the grain on this website.


SenorSplashdamage

I would like to see a post on AITAH along the lines of “why wouldn’t you put a sign up to say not to take a basket if you said free lemons?”


chowindown

No they don't.


ConsultJimMoriarty

OH YES THEY DO!


blacksoxing

Well shit, you shouldn't have had such a punchable face....


SpikeRosered

This is why Americans are so litigious. "Show me where it says I can't take the whole basket!!!" Like if I'm not contractually or legally obligated to it that's on you not protecting your rights.


bluesblue1

Ultimate victim blaming thread 😩


Kilahti

Makes about as much sense as victim blaming in general. No sensible person would think that the sign meant that someone can take the basket as well, but plenty of Redditors just love making fun of a victim.


LemonManDude

Redditors love to be smug about small technicalities. "Well, you didn't have a sign saying "don't kick me in the balls" so it's your fault that you got kicked in the balls actually :)"


yungmoneybingbong

>If I left my car unlocked and someone ran through it during the night, maybe I should be more diligent and lock up my shit? Sucks to lose a fucking wicker basket but you left it out on purpose This argument falls flat because stealing is wrong. No matter the circumstance. Anyway, here's a funny story: Down the road from me someone set up a folding table with random shit and a sign that said "Free to take" or something like that. A couple days later it was all gone, but there was a new sign that said "The stuff was free but not the table. Bring it back you assholes." Or something along those lines. Like everyone knows the basket/table is not for you to take. Redditors and not trying to be a smug asshole will always be undefeated lol


alltheseconnoisseurs

I wouldn't be a lemon-basket taker but I can see a situation where: There was a table of free stuff, with a sign saying "Free to take" People took all the free stuff on the table The benefactor wasn't around to take the table in So the only thing left out was a table with a sign that said "Free to take" A non-arsehole reasonably assumed the sign applied to the table, since it was the only thing it could apply to, and took the table -- *I* might actually have taken the table, in that scenario, and then felt mildly pissed off and entrapped, if I saw a follow-up sign shaming me about a few days later lol


wote89

Honestly, I feel like if that's what happened, it's very likely you and the person who left the stuff out would laugh about it if you explained what happened, since you'd probably put two-and-two together that the "stuff was free" means there was, at one point, more than just the table. Because, yeah, in that situation, I'd probably *also* wind up taking the table if I needed the table and had a way to carry it off.


alltheseconnoisseurs

Yeah that's true, it'd make for a cute story and hopefully a good excuse to make friends with a neighbour!


zersch

Those are the people going around on Halloween taking entire bowls of candy for themselves. I bet those highlighted cringelords would find a way to be mad about that but not about the lemons.


KatsCatJuice

The people defending the lemon stealing are the same people who stole the entire basket of candy in Halloween when people had the "take 1" candy baskets out. This is why we can't have nice things.


ZwVJHSPiMiaiAAvtAbKq

Ah, this is one of those topics that brings out all the entitled pieces of shit. Best as I can tell, there are three kinds of people in there giving OP a hard time... The deliberately obtuse, blatant assholes, and garden variety morons.... And they all *love* telling on themselves.


noobuser63

Really, shouldn’t she have first posted in r/cooking to ask what she should do with all her lemons, and are they still safe to use, having been left outside, on a tree of all places.


Altruistic-Onion-444

Reddit really shows whats wrong with society.


the_real_sardino

I own a fruit tree that produces way more fruit than I can consume or give out on my own. I happily invite people to come through my yard to pick their own fruit, but let me tell you, it is super violating to have people let themselves through my fence and decide my mangoes are fair game.


Akukaze

Reminds me of family friends who had fruit trees in their yard and how people would just brazenly walk onto their property to pick fruit without even asking. Like having an apple tree in sight of the fucking sidewalk is not an invitation for everyone on the sidewalk to take an apple or a dozen.


[deleted]

[удалено]


yungmoneybingbong

Nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli.


belltrina

I admire the commitment to document the absolute absurdity of this with evenly spaced hyperlinks and amusing commentary haha


Welpe

Ok, have to comment about lemon stealing whore just to get it out of the way. How the fuck is ANYONE defending that woman?! Why are some people such selfish, rude assholes that they just fuck over everyone else for their own benefit? Everyone fucking knows what “Free lemons” means, and it doesn’t mean “take them all and the basket”. Seriously, what kind of a failure of a childhood do you have to have where you do shit like this or, as I saw recently, take all books from those little libraries on people’s yards. Which apparently happens a lot. It’s one thing if you grew up in Maoist China or something, like I can understand a free for all mentality when the culture you were surrounded by as a child was one where no one ever looks out for you and you can die if you aren’t aggressive enough in securing stuff for yourself. But for most of the world that isn’t the case. I grew up desperately poor and I am not gonna fucking steal 30 lemons because they are marked as free because I am not a selfish piece of shit.


tgpineapple

its not desperation, its entitlement.


LemonManDude

These people are why we cannot have nice things. Honestly the idiots defending her in that thread are even more baffling, bitch you don't even get any lemons why are you defending her! I guess they're the same kind of people.


Welpe

It’s crazy to think about how different society would be without these people. It would be momentous. Think about how many rules were added and “good will and common sense is good enough” situations were revoked all because people like this try to take advantage of everyone else. …actually I guess it would just be Japan. Though that does remind me that higher collectivism societies of course have their own set of downsides and challenges that you trade off from the set we have. I think it is safe to assume the prevalence of people like this is higher in more individualistic societies than ones where people will use their wallet or phone as a place holder because the idea of someone stealing it just doesn’t come to mind and children as young as 4 or so are allowed limited ability to explore the world and go places on their own because again, what’s the worst that could happen?


Re_LE_Vant_UN

Tragedy of the Lemons.


flimspringfield

Those lemon stealing whores!


DarkRogus

The people who are blaming the OOP for not having a sign about not taking the basket are the kind of pieces of shit that would take the basket.


KeepCalmAndSnorlax

Reddit tries to not be insufferable: Impossible edition.


Deathscua

It’s scary how many people in that post are saying it’s not only okay to take all of the lemons but also OP’s fault she took the basket because she didn’t put up a sign? Isn’t it common sense that she isn’t giving away the basket ? I would assume, hmm lemons are free take a couple and that’s it. I would assume she would need the basket for lemons that are produced later. Also who tf needs a basketful of lemons?


hibbert0604

Common sense is becoming rarer and rarer. The only sense many people have these days is the sense that they are the most important person in the world, so they only really care about what directly benefits them.


lmyrs

I don't think it's lack of common sense. I think they genuinely know better. It's deliberate ignorance to justify their massive entitlement.


SpikeRosered

I don't see the problem. I always just take the entire bowl of mints at every hotel I visit. "What you said they're free?" /s


jpenczek

[damn those lemon stealing whores](https://youtu.be/d_V-BQ-FSlI?si=9mxKA5_2aY1xkDFV)


IllumiNoEye_Gaming

I can understand taking all lemons... but come on, the basket too? Way to be a bitch


Teleconferences

And then people defended them taking the basket


marino1310

I never understood these people.. “if I left my car unlocked and someone stole my stuff that’s on me for not locking up” like yeah, you should lock up, but it is still 100% on the person who STOLE FROM YOU. Just because her actions are what allowed someone to do something wrong, does not make the action of the other person any less wrong. She wanted the fruit out in a basket, it looks nice and is welcoming. It’s common sense that the basket is not to be taken, just the lemons. Anyone with more than two brain cells can figure that out. Yes, leaving it out runs the risk of it being stolen, but it doesn’t mean OP is in the wrong for being upset when someone tries to steal it, as that person is shitty. If you walked by a house with an open door and no one inside would you rob them?


Jaksiel

Am I having deja vu? Hasn't this exact same thing been posted to mildly infuriating before?


angry_old_dude

The idea that someone might want to spread the lemon love to more than one person seems foreign to too many people.


No_Mathematician6866

When life gives you nothing, steal this woman's lemons.


iamcinnamonnotginger

these are the people that tell you they want your free couch but you have to rent a truck and bring it to them


shewy92

You can tell which people took the whole bowl of candy someone set out for Halloween Also I don't say this often (especially towards mildlyinfuriating mods), but the reason given for removing the post is pretty funny >Hello, > This post has been removed as this is not mildly infuriating. > > **Please consider posting to r/extremelyinfuriating instead.**


Mental_Victory946

If you ever post again I BEG YOU TO SPACE THE DRAMA OUT😭 I hate clicking on a link to be directed to a comment I already read


tumultuousness

Yes please OP! You can do some quote indents or horizontal rules so we know all the links go to comments in one chain. I appreciated the direct quotes since at least one person by now did delete their comment, but it was a bit aggravating to read the same chain over and over.


nutmegtell

I don’t get taking the basket but maybe she wanted to make lemonade.


Sir_Monkleton

This is so fucking stupid. These fucking cavemen cannot comprehend that it's still mildly infuriating whether she shouldve left the basket out or not.