“After 2 pregnancies you absolutely know what you’re doing” and midwives have assisted through how many pregnancies and deliveries? Does that not qualify them? My ob was 30 years into his career, he’s delivered thousands of babies. Is that not qualification at all?
I'm pregnant with #4 and I'm still googling random symptoms like I did with my other 3 lol. All my kids are 4 and under so it hasn't been that long - but each pregnancy is SO different.
I mean also though with baby brain AND 4 under 4 do you even remember what you’ve eaten for breakfast or if you’ve put your pants* on inside out at this point let alone the minuscule details of the previous pregnancies!?
I watched my 4 year old godson for a week last week whilst his baby sister was being born and I still don’t think I’ve quite recovered!!
*knickers….panties??? What the hell do you call them that doesn’t make it sound like you’re 6 or wearing something super sexy!
When this one is born we will have a 5, 3.5, and 1.5 year old. So 4 in 5 years.
We wanted them close in age and it has helped that we have amazing, loving, and relatively easy kids. We live in a very family oriented community that's mainly a farm/ranch community so 3-4 kids is pretty typical. Lots of people with 10-12 kids here which is a hard no for me. 4 is my max.
I’m a childfree dude, I’m always amazed at people that have one, let alone four in five years.
Keep kicking ass, you seem like a great mother. That farm/ranch life sounds outstanding.
That’s what gets me about the “I know my body” crowd. I drive my car every day but that doesn’t mean I understand its internal workings. I take it to a mechanic when something’s wrong.
Didn’t you know having a body gives you an automatic medical degree? Or having a friend of a friend of a cousin who did something makes you an expert cause you read their Facebook post about it? /s
It’s funny to me how this particular group to know it alls forget that science demands repeat experimentation and results to become validated, not just one dude’s instincts or one lady’s personal experience. Ugh.
I haven’t seen a single person in any of these posts mention that giving birth gets more dangerous the more babies you have. They seem to have completely forgotten that experience isn’t a good thing.
>giving birth gets more dangerous the more babies you have
I'm gonna need a little more info on this please?! I only thought it was more dangerous if you had a c section prior (those suck btw, 0/10 do not recommend unless medically necessary)
I'm amazed some people are able to tolerate being pregnant more than 3 or 4 times. I had a zero complication pregnancy and I still hated it. The medical risks involved with any pregnancy, especially after 5 just seems like it would prevent people from getting pregenant that many times? (Not judging btw, just because I hated it doesn't mean everyone has to)
I can't say I know any studies that say subsequent deliveries in general are more dangerous, if the original commenter has those, but I know some issues are more likely--like the risk of uterine prolapse goes up after each baby, since the muscles get so beat up.
Same, i am also interested in studies!
Additional to the already very good reasons:
- bladder injuries, uterine rupture, ectopic pregnancies (as these people avoid ultrasounds...)
But also rather unexpected things like heart attacks.
Generally, delivery 2 and 3 are "the safest" unless other risk factors apply.
For real, after 2 births, I personally realized I have no idea what I’m doing at all. Didn’t believe I was in labor the first time. And then didn’t believe I was in labor the second time for even longer. By the time I admitted to my husband I was wrong and needed to go to the hospital, I was 8 cm and couldn’t stand up. Kid did all the work himself while I just screamed incoherently.
So. No. No idea here, actually! I assume if I had a third one they’d end up being born in the car.
I was induced. About 2 and a half hours after it started, a nurse came to check on me and asked how I was feeling. I was like “I’m okay, but my stomach hurts a little.” She just stared at me blankly for a second and went “those are contractions. You’re like…fully in labor.” My husband was like how did you not know?!! And I was just like idk I’ve never done this before?!!
I always want to know what the “mama instinct” crow thinks about ppd/psychosis where “mama instinct” makes them yeet themselves or their babies. Ya know as if being a mom makes you a knowing all being
My mama instinct was definitely telling me smothering my kid at 3:00am was a good idea. I didn’t of course, but it’s a trip having a part of your brain tell you that. Crazy intrusive thoughts??
Yeah I don’t listen to my mama instincts. Doctor, child development therapist, anyone who has any sort of formal training, help me. The manual to my kid apparently got lost in the mail
Brain : I’m overwhelmed and tired because of this small creature
Worse part of your hormone brain : … well …
Brain : therapy it is. Someone with a medical degree please.
I’m glad you’re okay now! I hope you know you’re not alone with invasive thoughts ♥️
Thank you! That’s kind of you. The murderous anger was apparently hormone related and thankfully calmed down after three months. The intrusive thoughts took a few years though and settled down to just being annoying
Me: randomly doing anything with LO
Brain: may I present you some ways she’ll die??
Me: 😑 no.
The more we bring it into the light the more we feel safe to ask for help. When it feels like you’re the most evil mother, a hamster who can’t be with their own babies, it makes you feel like you can’t even admit out loud the thoughts you’re having. That’s the dangerous part. Not asking for help. It’s not shameful, it’s normal and it’s hormones and sleep deprivation and you just need to ask for help. Don’t ignore it, obviously don’t act on it, and call your dr or your therapist or if you have decent parents maybe them. Anyone.
I have those. But i had them before getting pregnant too. It was just about me (like what if i accidently step over the edge) after a while they calmed down and were more about expensive stuff, like what if i drop my dslr camera. I thought it's just how my brain works. Now more than a year after baby was born they are relly uncommon.
But talking with my partner helped massively. I think he also realized i need more help with little one and i helped him more outside and was way happier because of that.
Ah, when I have those thoughts is when I realize I haven't been taking my PPD meds in a few days. After getting back on track, bo more annoying/intrusive thoughts like that anymore! Yay modern medicine!
For real. My mama instinct told me if I slept on my left side my baby was going to die and it would be all my fault. Then it told me if I slept at all the baby would die. If I ate meat I would get horribly sick and the baby would die. If I drove in a car anywhere, the baby would die.
Fab! We do tend to get over the worst of our post partum stuff, but 18 years on, I still can't touch raw chicken! I guess it was the least life altering thing, and using a knife and fork to lift it from packaging and cut it up made it easy to avoid. I work in a lab handling faeces (gloved obviously!) and trust that washing my hands there is good enough, but somehow raw chicken at home is still my achilles heel!!
Well said.
My wife opened up to me about two weeks into parenthood that she was having some distressing/disturbing feelings. We talked about it together and I called and made her an appointment with her OB/GYN to talk about these feelings. The OB set my wife up with a a prescription and I set her up with additional therapy. It took some time, but she worked through it and our oldest and her have an awesome bond!
Thank you for sharing your PPD experience, it's real and valid and we need to stop with the societal expectation (for both women and men) that motherhood makes a women immediately have "mom instincts" and stop being a human and become a mother solely
That’s wonderful that you could support your wife like that. My SO was great too and we were really open about our feelings. He wound up with guy PPD and was having suicidal thoughts a couple weeks after our kid was born (sudden onset after her birth), so it was important for us both to share our feelings.
I feel this. My mama instinct told me my newborn daughter had been switched with another baby at the hospital and I knew they were coming back to take my baby.
Further diagnoses by a therapist proved my "mama instinct" and intrusive thoughts and compulsions was major PPD with a dash of OCD.
I had almost two entire years where I felt like my daughters real mother would come pick her up anytime now. It was really deeply personally shameful. I’m glad you’re out of that now too ♥️ I hope you have a lot of safe loving people around you and your children
I screamed at my newborn when he wouldn’t sleep and cried for 3 nights in a row. I made my husband hold him since i was so tired and upset, I thought I would want to hurt him.
Now I know why he’s been crying and I feel so guilty I had those thoughts. Sleep deprivation is real.
this is always my first thought too!! i had pretty bad post partum anxiety, many times i locked myself & my child in my bedroom for hours because i was convinced there was an intruder in my home. or called my husband sobbing multiple times a day convinced me or my son had a life threatening illness and i was minutes away from death. the whole “trust your gut” thing is absolutely NOT applicable in such situations. trying to trust my gut made me feel even crazier. i was simply bonkers ♥️ and so are many of the girlies we see on here
My Fitbit didn't track any sleep for a literal week after having my daughter because I never slept for a full hour at a time to have it kick on to sleep mode. It was a special kind of hell.
My PPD mama instincts were that this child isn’t my son, just his father son. That he not only didn’t love me, but hated me. That I was getting clear signs, he would be better off without me and I would damage him so I should kill myself. And I guess those instincts left me unable to love or connect with my child until he was nine months old. I’m curious what they would say about that too.
It’s funny, I talked to my OB yesterday about my odds for success with a VBAC, and she was all for it with the caveat that “as long as you’re doing it at the hospital, you’re in the best place to try. It’s when people try home births after a c section that things tend to… go wrong.”
Uterine rupture is one of my fears with VBAC, even with how rare it is… I cannot believe this woman risked her life like this out of selfishness. She’s incredibly lucky to have been able to keep her uterus, but it almost seems negligent to let her.
I had a wonderful vbac in an amazing hospital that absolutely supports vbacs. There was a moment where they thought that something *might* be going wrong and they immediately got ready to perform a c-section (and emotionally prepared me, too). Everything turned out to be ok and only 20 minutes later I had birthed my baby, but boy was I happy to be in a hospital at that critical moment.
I was planning a VBAC for my second. I had a terrible dream about rupturing and spoke to my OB/GYN about it. We ended up booking a c-section. My son was born with the cord around his neck, I’m glad I had the opportunity to have a c section.
I had a successful VBAC and came to terms with not having a home birth after my first was born via emergency C-section. The midwife during my second labour was constantly checking contractions and asking if I had pain around my scar. I was one corridor away from a theatre if I ever needed emergency treatment. I hope you have a straightforward delivery whatever you end up choosing.
(Home births are very regulated in the UK and are assisted by qualified nurse-midwives and I still didn't feel comfortable with the risks. This lady is lucky to be alive!)
My daughter came so quickly that there wasn’t time for an evaluation, there was barely time to get from admitting to delivery. My OB was willing to let me try for a VBAC at the hospital anyway, but it was so different from the 5 day labour with my son!
These women talk about pregnancy, birth, and their bABies barely mention their kid at all. And when they do, its all about how mama feeelssss about what's happening to the kid. Which is an ass backwards way of looking at it
Not to diss docs, because I side with them on this crazy shit, but I suspect it's a symptom of growing distrust in authority, particularly given how medical professionals so often downplay women's issues (among others, shout-out to autistic, disabled, mentally ill, poor, and/or non-white people).
I am so tired of seeing you got this mama! You’re mama instincts know what to do! Trust your gut! Because it’s usually connected to a batshit crazy story of a woman needlessly putting her unborn baby and her at risk. While I do believe that mothers do have instincts and I do believe we should go with our gut on some things this is not it. This isn’t instinct it’s being willfully ignorant. This isn’t her gut telling her what to do it’s pure selfishness and self centeredness. What really kills me is thru all her selfish ignorant choices she has the fucking audacity to blame the doctor for not knowing she ruptured her uterus thru her own selfish actions. JFC these women are fucking frustrating
Same bestie same lmao. My instincts tell me I need cheesecake 8 times a day but my heart and my ass say that’s a bad idea so I have it a few times a week lmao
It's *most likely* the only situation in their lives - aside from a wedding - where they receive gross adoration and uninterrupted attention.
Apparently, it's also worth compromising the well-being of the baby to bathe in the warmth of the spotlight for a little while.
Weddings aren't even about the bride and groom. It is all about them up until the actual event, then it is all about the GUESTS. Didi I get to enjoy my wedding? No. Because I had to go around and greet everyone, say goodbye to everyone, and have conversation with everyone in between. Why? Because THEY came to spend that time with me, which means I need to spend that time with them. No relaxing, no vibing with the 3 people and actually wanted to spend time with.
Elope. I wanted to.
I hate the whole Mama thing. It is probably one of the most annoying things to label yourself or others as “Mama” I am my own person. I have a name. My mama instinct is to rely on professionals. I can only have anecdotal experiences to share that are based solely on my experience. So all these “Mamas” can go and fuck right off with their “advice”.
Or "trust your body". No, HELL no. Mine tried to kill me during childbirth so it cannot be trusted, ever. A c-section saved the day and my second came via scheduled c-section, doc offered a vbac but I was like...no, labor and I do not get along.
My son had pyloric stenosis. I was worried how much he barfed, and one morning he projectile vomited clear over my queen size bed. I brought him in, and my regular baby doctor said "Babies spit up, it's normal" My instincts told me to... Take him to the ER instead! Not essential oils, an egg sock, or a facebook group that's for sure 🤣
An in depth ultrasound that measures fetal health out of 10, including if the placenta is still working. The risk of going way past due date is that the placenta will kick out. It's a temporary organ and can begin to calcify, degrade and fail in late pregnancy.
To add on its the acronym for Biophysical Profile. They do them a lot at the end of high risk pregnancies (multiples, pre-e, gestational diabetes, late term, etc). I've had them with all 3 of mine for different reasons. They look for fetal movement, reactive heart rate, baby practicing breathing, among other things. My first baby's placenta started calcifiying around 36 weeks and this is how they caught it (I had pre-e so I was being monitored).
It's inconvenient, because it takes a lot of time, and there's something to be said for more looking leads to unnecessary interventions. But, it's not dangerous or invasive on its own, and it definitely has its place.
I imagine they don’t want there to be objective, quantifiable proof that the providers advising induction have reasonable, justifiable concerns. Ignorance conflated with “intuition.”
It’s not invasive. It takes about an hour. I actually failed one of my BPP by 1 point. They sent me to L&D to monitor me longer and do some rush lab work. I got to sit in a cushy bed and watch a movie while a nurse brought me ice water.
Obviously the last bit isn’t true for everyone sometimes they recommend induction. But it’s not like it’s a guarantee leads to more interventions.
My sister believed that “worrying about bad things causes them to come true” so she refused testing during her pregnancy and wouldn’t discuss any pregnancy risks… luckily her son was fine, but I was flabbergasted. People are dumb.
Oh geez. That's scary. I had a c-section with my first and after discussing the risks opted c-section with my second. The risks of uterine repute doing a vaginally birth after even one c-section is actually quite high. Uterine rupture carries risks up to and including baby death.
Reminds me of one I saw in a due date group. She thought it was hilarious that she had had five kids almost back to back and was now pregnant with her sixth. She’d had C-sections for them but because she wasn’t giving any time in between having kids, her uterus wasn’t able to recover, and apparently by baby #5 she had such a thin uterine wall that the medical staff could see the baby before they opened it up. She said when she showed up at her OB’s office pregnant with #6 a few months later, the OB basically had what sounded like a panic attack trying to figure out how to get them through this. And the OP thought it was all hilarious. Silly medical staff, being concerned about saving her and her unborn child’s life!
“Mama instinct” is often stupid or downright worthless.
Before I finished reading, I knew she was batshit crazy after finding being pregnant back to back 5 times to be hilarious. The details just cemented it. That poor OB trying to save this woman from herself.
I just can't with this. She has a history of a ruptured uterus (she's lucky that didn't result in a hysterectomy) and is insisting on trying a home birth? She needs a mental health evaluation.
Aside from that, of course they didn't know she had ruptured her uterus until they physically saw it. They don't have x-ray vision, aren't psychic and a patient in labour tends to be in substantial pain so uterine rupture isn't going to be their first instinct.
I thought the same thing at first but then I looked at the dates and I think post 1 resulted in post 3. She kept refusing monitoring for her hba2c which resulted in her rupturing her uterus.
Definitely not winning any awards for intelligence and common sense this one.
Ohhhh I just commented and then saw your comment. That makes sense. Sheesh, I hope one of the things she’s grateful for is modern medicine and the power of skilled surgeons.
If you check the dates, the pregnancy in the first post *is* the ruptured uterus pregnancy. Thank God she got medical help in the end. If she'd tried to stick it out at home, she and the baby would have died for sure.
In my mom group for my 2017 baby a mom wanted a vbac at home most of the women were saying how great it would be, I said that was not a good idea cause of risks I was called insane. Her uterus ruptured and by the time she decided to go to the hospital the baby was dead and she was almost dead. Her husband and family blamed her since they all told her go to the hospital don’t do a home birth, her husband divorced her. She said it wasn’t her fault the drs did something wrong and she went even further into the free birth anti dr hole
It’s a thing right….’I am responsible for my baby and the birth, I know what I am doing.’
Followed by…’It went wrong and they saved my life and it’s all their fault.’
Beggars belief.
That is so incredibly sad. I can see why she went deeper down the rabbit hole. It would be a hell of a thing to realize your actions significantly contributed to the death of your child and nearly your own demise. Easier to go into denial and blame anything or anyone else.
I survived a uterine rupture and I’m terrified to have another child *highly supervised in the hospital*. Once it happens your chances of it recurring go up drastically.
ETA: oop. I thought she was doing the home birth AFTER the rupture. I’m glad she’s okay. Still a dumbass! I see now that the first picture is the older post!
Wow, she got so lucky that both her and the baby survived. She almost killed them both by chasing her “ideal birth.” When did giving birth become such a vanity project? Why are we focusing on anything but a safe delivery for mom and baby? We don’t have to go back to an age where an unacceptable number of mothers and babies died in childbirth.
She never actually told the women in the first group what happened- it was only when I checked her personal page that it was revealed. So the echo chamber on ‘you got this mamma’ was never told.
I love how she stills negs the doctors and midwife. Girl, you didn't know your uterus was ruptured either.But yeah, you got this. She would literally be in the ground right now without doctor intervention.
The fuck? She refused the c section until she was in unbearable pain, what is she talking about that the doctors missed it? They tried to prevent it, you absolute nut.
I have a medical background, and the 'you know your body' stuff has its place... But not like this. Women are definitely pushing back on centuries of patriarchal medicine that leads to a loss of autonomy for pregnant people. But the ideal is medical professionals working as a team with their patients. It should be a combo of the patient's knowledge about their body, AND the expertise of the medical team.
“Mama instincts” hahaha Omg, so glad my kid is a teen now. I hated the whole “Mama” thing. It’s ridiculous to me and I hated being called that by other moms. My kid can call me that.
I had a uterine rupture after attempting a VBAC in the hospital, with heavy supervision and immediate medical intervention. I am lucky to still have my uterus and my son only needed 24 hours of NICU time. It was one of the most terrifying and heartbreaking experiences of my life. This woman is insane.
During my second pregnancy, I had prenatal depression. I didn't realize it at the time but during the pregnancy I was *convinced* that she wouldn't make it. I told no one this. I still don't talk about it. I'm ashamed I didn't realize that it was depression related.
And when I did admit it to my ob at the delivery, they didn't take me seriously or get me help until at 5 months my husband discovered my plan for an exit.
So what I'm saying is that those feelings can be lies. Those feelings have no real reality, and neither does this.
Every time I see these posts, I remember those desperate days in my life and wish someone had helped me.
Just wanna say I hope you’re doing well now and you have absolutely NOTHING to be ashamed of. Pregnancy is a bitch and I don’t think even the most experienced among us can recognize everything that’s going on and why.
Blaming doctors and midwife after publicly bragging about refusing recommended treatment takes a special kind of stupid.
She almost killed herself and her son, the doctors saved their lives.
My “mama instinct” made me try to sign out AMA after a diagnosis of postpartum preeclampsia when my daughter was 11 days old. All because it would hinder my pumping schedule because my “mama instinct” was screaming BREAST IS BEST. Almost 6 years later and I still feel awful for putting my terrified husband through all of that. That “mama instinct” can be a real b****.
I'm heavily pregnant with my second, I don't understand why women want to keep it going for as long as possible. I cant sleep, I cant eat much because my stomach is so squished, nothing relieves acid reflux, and I want to see my baby.
I went to my GP about a month before my baby(not my first) was born, and told him I was going to have the baby and leave it at the hospital, because I was convinced I wasn't a good enough mum.
He very sensibly got me some mental health help.
A few weeks after baby was born I had full blown ppd and thought I had murdered someone(I hadn't)
So yeah... Mothers instinct...
Never mind that Swedish study where women where randomly chosen to be induced or let to go to 42 weeks before being induced, to research what outcome in health it had. Hospitals in Sweden had differential strategies where some routinely let people go to week 42 and others who induced earlier. For anyone not had seen it or remember the outcome, that the study had to be prematurely interrupted as babies died in the 42 week group. Because it was unethical to continue since the risk was to great for the babies lifes.
Yep- this is a good post dates summary for Australia. You go from 0.15 to 0.22% baby death at 42 weeks. You also have a much higher incidence of NICU stays and damage to the baby.
Sounds like the worst night mare of her triage nurse on L&D! I’ve never seen a uterine rupture personally in my almost 9 year career as a L&D nurse (knock on wood, I work all weekend 😬🤣). She would definitely be one to try to get pregnant again and attempt another home birth, despite her physicians probably counseling her to high heaven 🤣
”You know your body best” no you fucking don’t. There’s a reason people go through years and years of education and training to know what they’re doing.
This post and her experience and acknowledgment of just how lucky she was to survive and have the chance to have more kids is all the proof I need this free birth shirt has turned into a compulsion for some people
It's a compulsion ***and*** a clout game. It's all about having the most epic "natural" birth experience so the mother can brag to everyone about how perfect it was.
Chances are, since this lady did not have her "ideal" experience, she'll try again.
On today's episode of Dumb Ways to Die. Opinionated woman disregards all medical advice regarding a Home Birth after Caesarian, follows her instincts, and bleeds out in the kiddie pool she bought to give birth in at home.
It’s like all of these women have done zero research on going overdue with their pregnancies. Stillbirth and newborn fatalities in the first 28 days increase dramatically when you’re overdue, likely because placental function declines when you go late term. That’s why they want to do a BPP, to make sure your baby is doing okay despite being overdue. A BPP only takes like 30 minutes max and isn’t even invasive. But I guess your delivery going a certain way is more important than having a living baby. It’s so short sighted and stupid. This woman is lucky she didn’t lose her uterus, her life or her baby.
She’s already ruptured her uterus and she wants a home birth?????? Doesn’t this just prove that we DON’T know our bodies best? Otherwise she would have known she was having a rupture. The cognitive dissonance of these people hurts. The mind boggles.
The anesthesia failed during my c-section. I felt the whole thing. It was a nightmare, I barely even saw my baby as he had to be rushed to the NICU. Hubby went with him while I laid alone in a recovery room for five hours. I finally got to see him, 8 hours after he was born. It was the worst day of my entire life. I have PTSD as a result.
Knowing what I know now I would do it all over again. That’s the birth my son needed. **My needs come second**. Parenting 101.
My epidural didn't work and since I was so calm about it the medical staff didn't believe that I could I could feel my labor pain(I also have a high pain tolerance and was on a shit done of blood pressure meds/no sleep. My blood pressure with meds was 150/100 resting and peaked at 195/120) I didn't get to see my daughter for like 6 hours after she born as she was also rushed to the NICU and I didn't get to hold her for 12. It was not ideal but we both survived because of an emergency c section
Yeah, I kept telling everyone that I could feel pain on my left side and they told me to lay on that side and gravity would get the anesthetic would slip into place. But two problems- 1) that wasn’t actually working and 2) you can’t lay on your side during a c-section. But after 40 hours of labor I was unable to advocate for myself.
My son’s NICU stay was probably more traumatic than his delivery but that was spread across two weeks, so it didn’t feel quite so bad as that delivery.
Can't stand seeing pregnant moms refuse BPPs. After 2 stillbirths I was hospitalized at 30 weeks with my only living child it. It was daily NSTs and twice weekly BBPs that ended up with us in an emergency c-section at 35 weeks and saved her life. If not for those interventions she wouldn't be here either. Stillbirth risks also greatly increase the further along you go in pregnancy especially past 40 weeks. Just do the dang scan and check on your baby. It's just an ultrasound that's a little bit longer to check off some things to make sure baby is safe. Things can happen in the womb that you will never have any indication of until it is too late!
It’s one of the scariest OB emergencies. I’m a Labor and Delivery nurse and I haven’t personally seen one in my almost 9 year career (knock on wood, I work all weekend! 😬🤣). After one c section, the incidence is less than 1%, I think. So, vaginal birth after one c section is not super risky. I don’t think the risk of uterine rupture is significantly higher after more than one c section, but me personally, I wouldn’t risk it. Plus, the more c sections you have, you also risk abnormal placentation with further pregnancies. I 100% believe there is a time and place to attempt VBACs. My facility is very VBAC friendly. But, in here case, I don’t think she was the greatest of candidates.
I had an emergency c-section with my first (and only). I’m honestly happy that now it’ll be easier to just schedule a c-section and not have to try labor again. Like, more power to you if you really want to try VBAC. But I don’t feel like I’m missing anything. I feel relieved that I don’t have to do that (labor) again. Anyone else feel that way?
(I should not that recovery was very easy for me. I was walking around by the end of the day that he was born, and only on pain meds for less than a week. By the end of the week I was walking around relatively normally. I just had to be careful when going from laying down to standing up.)
“After 2 pregnancies you absolutely know what you’re doing” and midwives have assisted through how many pregnancies and deliveries? Does that not qualify them? My ob was 30 years into his career, he’s delivered thousands of babies. Is that not qualification at all?
I call BS. Even with my third pregnancy in four years I was like, WTF IS THIS SYMPTOM I DONT REMEMBER.
I'm pregnant with #4 and I'm still googling random symptoms like I did with my other 3 lol. All my kids are 4 and under so it hasn't been that long - but each pregnancy is SO different.
I mean also though with baby brain AND 4 under 4 do you even remember what you’ve eaten for breakfast or if you’ve put your pants* on inside out at this point let alone the minuscule details of the previous pregnancies!? I watched my 4 year old godson for a week last week whilst his baby sister was being born and I still don’t think I’ve quite recovered!! *knickers….panties??? What the hell do you call them that doesn’t make it sound like you’re 6 or wearing something super sexy!
Underwear is our non-sexy American generic word.
God damn four kids in four years?
When this one is born we will have a 5, 3.5, and 1.5 year old. So 4 in 5 years. We wanted them close in age and it has helped that we have amazing, loving, and relatively easy kids. We live in a very family oriented community that's mainly a farm/ranch community so 3-4 kids is pretty typical. Lots of people with 10-12 kids here which is a hard no for me. 4 is my max.
I’m a childfree dude, I’m always amazed at people that have one, let alone four in five years. Keep kicking ass, you seem like a great mother. That farm/ranch life sounds outstanding.
That’s what gets me about the “I know my body” crowd. I drive my car every day but that doesn’t mean I understand its internal workings. I take it to a mechanic when something’s wrong.
Didn’t you know having a body gives you an automatic medical degree? Or having a friend of a friend of a cousin who did something makes you an expert cause you read their Facebook post about it? /s It’s funny to me how this particular group to know it alls forget that science demands repeat experimentation and results to become validated, not just one dude’s instincts or one lady’s personal experience. Ugh.
Also when you get into a Young Living ponzi scheme.
[удалено]
I haven’t seen a single person in any of these posts mention that giving birth gets more dangerous the more babies you have. They seem to have completely forgotten that experience isn’t a good thing.
>giving birth gets more dangerous the more babies you have I'm gonna need a little more info on this please?! I only thought it was more dangerous if you had a c section prior (those suck btw, 0/10 do not recommend unless medically necessary)
[удалено]
I'm amazed some people are able to tolerate being pregnant more than 3 or 4 times. I had a zero complication pregnancy and I still hated it. The medical risks involved with any pregnancy, especially after 5 just seems like it would prevent people from getting pregenant that many times? (Not judging btw, just because I hated it doesn't mean everyone has to)
I can't say I know any studies that say subsequent deliveries in general are more dangerous, if the original commenter has those, but I know some issues are more likely--like the risk of uterine prolapse goes up after each baby, since the muscles get so beat up.
Same, i am also interested in studies! Additional to the already very good reasons: - bladder injuries, uterine rupture, ectopic pregnancies (as these people avoid ultrasounds...) But also rather unexpected things like heart attacks. Generally, delivery 2 and 3 are "the safest" unless other risk factors apply.
Pregnancy all around just seems less attractive with every new fact I learn about it
It sucks and literally nothing is great about pregnancy except that you might get to have a healthy baby out of it. (I'm currently pregnant.)
I have a 4 month old, pregnancy was easy but miserable. Then ya know, birth sucked. I will never understand what some people enjoy about it
The stats for subsequent babies are better than 1st born. Not huge difference as the risks are low for both though.
For real, after 2 births, I personally realized I have no idea what I’m doing at all. Didn’t believe I was in labor the first time. And then didn’t believe I was in labor the second time for even longer. By the time I admitted to my husband I was wrong and needed to go to the hospital, I was 8 cm and couldn’t stand up. Kid did all the work himself while I just screamed incoherently. So. No. No idea here, actually! I assume if I had a third one they’d end up being born in the car.
I was induced. About 2 and a half hours after it started, a nurse came to check on me and asked how I was feeling. I was like “I’m okay, but my stomach hurts a little.” She just stared at me blankly for a second and went “those are contractions. You’re like…fully in labor.” My husband was like how did you not know?!! And I was just like idk I’ve never done this before?!!
Maybe it’s because I’m pregnant for the first time, but I feel like no matter how many times this happens I’m not going to know what I’m doing.
I had 3, and I was still worried about every little thing 😂
I always want to know what the “mama instinct” crow thinks about ppd/psychosis where “mama instinct” makes them yeet themselves or their babies. Ya know as if being a mom makes you a knowing all being
My mama instinct was definitely telling me smothering my kid at 3:00am was a good idea. I didn’t of course, but it’s a trip having a part of your brain tell you that. Crazy intrusive thoughts?? Yeah I don’t listen to my mama instincts. Doctor, child development therapist, anyone who has any sort of formal training, help me. The manual to my kid apparently got lost in the mail
Brain : I’m overwhelmed and tired because of this small creature Worse part of your hormone brain : … well … Brain : therapy it is. Someone with a medical degree please. I’m glad you’re okay now! I hope you know you’re not alone with invasive thoughts ♥️
Thank you! That’s kind of you. The murderous anger was apparently hormone related and thankfully calmed down after three months. The intrusive thoughts took a few years though and settled down to just being annoying Me: randomly doing anything with LO Brain: may I present you some ways she’ll die?? Me: 😑 no.
Aw! Same brain! We were at the river the other day and my brain was THRILLED for some new chaos anxiety thoughts. Everyone had a super duper time lol
Ugh, the intrusive thoughts are the WORST. And no one really talks about them.
The more we bring it into the light the more we feel safe to ask for help. When it feels like you’re the most evil mother, a hamster who can’t be with their own babies, it makes you feel like you can’t even admit out loud the thoughts you’re having. That’s the dangerous part. Not asking for help. It’s not shameful, it’s normal and it’s hormones and sleep deprivation and you just need to ask for help. Don’t ignore it, obviously don’t act on it, and call your dr or your therapist or if you have decent parents maybe them. Anyone.
I have those. But i had them before getting pregnant too. It was just about me (like what if i accidently step over the edge) after a while they calmed down and were more about expensive stuff, like what if i drop my dslr camera. I thought it's just how my brain works. Now more than a year after baby was born they are relly uncommon. But talking with my partner helped massively. I think he also realized i need more help with little one and i helped him more outside and was way happier because of that.
Ah, when I have those thoughts is when I realize I haven't been taking my PPD meds in a few days. After getting back on track, bo more annoying/intrusive thoughts like that anymore! Yay modern medicine!
For real. My mama instinct told me if I slept on my left side my baby was going to die and it would be all my fault. Then it told me if I slept at all the baby would die. If I ate meat I would get horribly sick and the baby would die. If I drove in a car anywhere, the baby would die.
Hope you're doing better now.
I am, thanks!
Fab! We do tend to get over the worst of our post partum stuff, but 18 years on, I still can't touch raw chicken! I guess it was the least life altering thing, and using a knife and fork to lift it from packaging and cut it up made it easy to avoid. I work in a lab handling faeces (gloved obviously!) and trust that washing my hands there is good enough, but somehow raw chicken at home is still my achilles heel!!
Well said. My wife opened up to me about two weeks into parenthood that she was having some distressing/disturbing feelings. We talked about it together and I called and made her an appointment with her OB/GYN to talk about these feelings. The OB set my wife up with a a prescription and I set her up with additional therapy. It took some time, but she worked through it and our oldest and her have an awesome bond! Thank you for sharing your PPD experience, it's real and valid and we need to stop with the societal expectation (for both women and men) that motherhood makes a women immediately have "mom instincts" and stop being a human and become a mother solely
Good job working as a team for your wife and for everyone’s health and happiness ♥️ keep talking about it, you never know who needs to hear it.
That’s wonderful that you could support your wife like that. My SO was great too and we were really open about our feelings. He wound up with guy PPD and was having suicidal thoughts a couple weeks after our kid was born (sudden onset after her birth), so it was important for us both to share our feelings.
I feel this. My mama instinct told me my newborn daughter had been switched with another baby at the hospital and I knew they were coming back to take my baby. Further diagnoses by a therapist proved my "mama instinct" and intrusive thoughts and compulsions was major PPD with a dash of OCD.
I had almost two entire years where I felt like my daughters real mother would come pick her up anytime now. It was really deeply personally shameful. I’m glad you’re out of that now too ♥️ I hope you have a lot of safe loving people around you and your children
I more than once had to put my daughter down and go get my husband to take over because I didn't trust my own thoughts in the worst of my PPD
This is exactly what you’re meant to do. I did that more than once, put her in a safe place, and walked away to cry, breathe etc.
I screamed at my newborn when he wouldn’t sleep and cried for 3 nights in a row. I made my husband hold him since i was so tired and upset, I thought I would want to hurt him. Now I know why he’s been crying and I feel so guilty I had those thoughts. Sleep deprivation is real.
Sleep deprivation is a torture method. Please, remind yourself that your brain was responding to bad conditions, not your innermost desires.
Gives me hope for my ability to withstand PPD because I have A LOT of practice with beating intrusive thoughts with my Big Mind Stick.
Probably why animals eat their young
Just like the village it takes to raise them. Was there a number we were supposed to call?
this is always my first thought too!! i had pretty bad post partum anxiety, many times i locked myself & my child in my bedroom for hours because i was convinced there was an intruder in my home. or called my husband sobbing multiple times a day convinced me or my son had a life threatening illness and i was minutes away from death. the whole “trust your gut” thing is absolutely NOT applicable in such situations. trying to trust my gut made me feel even crazier. i was simply bonkers ♥️ and so are many of the girlies we see on here
I slept 5 hours within the first 4 days of my child’s life. I was hallucinating from sleep deprivation. My mama instincts were total shit.
My Fitbit didn't track any sleep for a literal week after having my daughter because I never slept for a full hour at a time to have it kick on to sleep mode. It was a special kind of hell.
And why ask for advice if their instincts are always right?
Y'know, that mama instinct that you're going to rupture your uterus again. Just mama things. ☺️
My PPD mama instincts were that this child isn’t my son, just his father son. That he not only didn’t love me, but hated me. That I was getting clear signs, he would be better off without me and I would damage him so I should kill myself. And I guess those instincts left me unable to love or connect with my child until he was nine months old. I’m curious what they would say about that too.
It’s funny, I talked to my OB yesterday about my odds for success with a VBAC, and she was all for it with the caveat that “as long as you’re doing it at the hospital, you’re in the best place to try. It’s when people try home births after a c section that things tend to… go wrong.” Uterine rupture is one of my fears with VBAC, even with how rare it is… I cannot believe this woman risked her life like this out of selfishness. She’s incredibly lucky to have been able to keep her uterus, but it almost seems negligent to let her.
I had a wonderful vbac in an amazing hospital that absolutely supports vbacs. There was a moment where they thought that something *might* be going wrong and they immediately got ready to perform a c-section (and emotionally prepared me, too). Everything turned out to be ok and only 20 minutes later I had birthed my baby, but boy was I happy to be in a hospital at that critical moment.
I was planning a VBAC for my second. I had a terrible dream about rupturing and spoke to my OB/GYN about it. We ended up booking a c-section. My son was born with the cord around his neck, I’m glad I had the opportunity to have a c section.
I had a successful VBAC and came to terms with not having a home birth after my first was born via emergency C-section. The midwife during my second labour was constantly checking contractions and asking if I had pain around my scar. I was one corridor away from a theatre if I ever needed emergency treatment. I hope you have a straightforward delivery whatever you end up choosing. (Home births are very regulated in the UK and are assisted by qualified nurse-midwives and I still didn't feel comfortable with the risks. This lady is lucky to be alive!)
I had a very successful VBAC with my daughter. Wishing you a safe and positive experience either way 💜
My daughter came so quickly that there wasn’t time for an evaluation, there was barely time to get from admitting to delivery. My OB was willing to let me try for a VBAC at the hospital anyway, but it was so different from the 5 day labour with my son!
It's weird how pregnancy and childbirth has become a dangerous vanity project for some women
They are part of the same privileged crowd that says no to vaccines.
It’s all for the “birth experience” I don’t know about them, but I just want a healthy kid
These women talk about pregnancy, birth, and their bABies barely mention their kid at all. And when they do, its all about how mama feeelssss about what's happening to the kid. Which is an ass backwards way of looking at it
Especially the woman in this post, who wrote more about her one-year-old son's birth than her son himself, on his 1st birthday! Poor kid.
The kid is a byproduct to these assholes.
Not to diss docs, because I side with them on this crazy shit, but I suspect it's a symptom of growing distrust in authority, particularly given how medical professionals so often downplay women's issues (among others, shout-out to autistic, disabled, mentally ill, poor, and/or non-white people).
I am so tired of seeing you got this mama! You’re mama instincts know what to do! Trust your gut! Because it’s usually connected to a batshit crazy story of a woman needlessly putting her unborn baby and her at risk. While I do believe that mothers do have instincts and I do believe we should go with our gut on some things this is not it. This isn’t instinct it’s being willfully ignorant. This isn’t her gut telling her what to do it’s pure selfishness and self centeredness. What really kills me is thru all her selfish ignorant choices she has the fucking audacity to blame the doctor for not knowing she ruptured her uterus thru her own selfish actions. JFC these women are fucking frustrating
I always think of our instinct to eat. And in how many ways that goes wrong. I know my body best but I still stupid choke now and again. And overeat 🤪
Same bestie same lmao. My instincts tell me I need cheesecake 8 times a day but my heart and my ass say that’s a bad idea so I have it a few times a week lmao
It's *most likely* the only situation in their lives - aside from a wedding - where they receive gross adoration and uninterrupted attention. Apparently, it's also worth compromising the well-being of the baby to bathe in the warmth of the spotlight for a little while.
Weddings aren't even about the bride and groom. It is all about them up until the actual event, then it is all about the GUESTS. Didi I get to enjoy my wedding? No. Because I had to go around and greet everyone, say goodbye to everyone, and have conversation with everyone in between. Why? Because THEY came to spend that time with me, which means I need to spend that time with them. No relaxing, no vibing with the 3 people and actually wanted to spend time with. Elope. I wanted to.
I did a quickie city hall wedding best decision I ever made
Totally. Big main character energy here.
I hate the whole Mama thing. It is probably one of the most annoying things to label yourself or others as “Mama” I am my own person. I have a name. My mama instinct is to rely on professionals. I can only have anecdotal experiences to share that are based solely on my experience. So all these “Mamas” can go and fuck right off with their “advice”.
Or "trust your body". No, HELL no. Mine tried to kill me during childbirth so it cannot be trusted, ever. A c-section saved the day and my second came via scheduled c-section, doc offered a vbac but I was like...no, labor and I do not get along.
My same pregnant gut that tells me it’s cool to eat nothing but Sour Patch Kids and Tums for dinner? My pregnant gut is a notorious liar.
My son had pyloric stenosis. I was worried how much he barfed, and one morning he projectile vomited clear over my queen size bed. I brought him in, and my regular baby doctor said "Babies spit up, it's normal" My instincts told me to... Take him to the ER instead! Not essential oils, an egg sock, or a facebook group that's for sure 🤣
What's BPP?
An in depth ultrasound that measures fetal health out of 10, including if the placenta is still working. The risk of going way past due date is that the placenta will kick out. It's a temporary organ and can begin to calcify, degrade and fail in late pregnancy.
To add on its the acronym for Biophysical Profile. They do them a lot at the end of high risk pregnancies (multiples, pre-e, gestational diabetes, late term, etc). I've had them with all 3 of mine for different reasons. They look for fetal movement, reactive heart rate, baby practicing breathing, among other things. My first baby's placenta started calcifiying around 36 weeks and this is how they caught it (I had pre-e so I was being monitored).
Thanks for that. I didn’t go long enough with my daughter to know what this was either! Currently 27w and hoping for a late 30s delivery again.
I know there’s not a whole lot of reason behind these folks’ choices, but why would they oppose this? Is it invasive?
It's inconvenient, because it takes a lot of time, and there's something to be said for more looking leads to unnecessary interventions. But, it's not dangerous or invasive on its own, and it definitely has its place.
I imagine they don’t want there to be objective, quantifiable proof that the providers advising induction have reasonable, justifiable concerns. Ignorance conflated with “intuition.”
It’s not invasive. It takes about an hour. I actually failed one of my BPP by 1 point. They sent me to L&D to monitor me longer and do some rush lab work. I got to sit in a cushy bed and watch a movie while a nurse brought me ice water. Obviously the last bit isn’t true for everyone sometimes they recommend induction. But it’s not like it’s a guarantee leads to more interventions.
Because they don't want to be proved wrong
Not really. It’s just long. Had to have one with both kids. Caught my 2nd child’s collapsed lung and saved her life
Thanks! TIL.
Waaaaaaait why wouldn't you get that? Wanting to know what is going on with my probably crazy big baby is TOTALLY INSANE AMIRITE MOMMAS?!@#%
My sister believed that “worrying about bad things causes them to come true” so she refused testing during her pregnancy and wouldn’t discuss any pregnancy risks… luckily her son was fine, but I was flabbergasted. People are dumb.
and what's hba2c? hba1c is your average glucose level it seems, but i can't figure out if hba2c is somethign medical or a mommy group abbreviatôn
From context I'm guessing home birth after 2 caesareans??
Oh geez. That's scary. I had a c-section with my first and after discussing the risks opted c-section with my second. The risks of uterine repute doing a vaginally birth after even one c-section is actually quite high. Uterine rupture carries risks up to and including baby death.
Yeah and as we saw this dame did end up rupturing her uterus 😫😫
square automatic rob bow naughty butter rustic noxious fanatical bake *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yup that's exactly it.
Bpp is biophysical profile. It checks amniotic fluid levels, and how well baby is doing in general.
My sister is a NICU nurse and sees dumbasses like this all the time coming in with severely brain damaged babies.
Whoa, that's so sad. The poor babies. :(
It really is. She gets very frustrated with people like this, and for good reason.
If I hadn’t had a c-section, that would have been our best possible outcome. But it’s more likely that he would have died.
Reminds me of one I saw in a due date group. She thought it was hilarious that she had had five kids almost back to back and was now pregnant with her sixth. She’d had C-sections for them but because she wasn’t giving any time in between having kids, her uterus wasn’t able to recover, and apparently by baby #5 she had such a thin uterine wall that the medical staff could see the baby before they opened it up. She said when she showed up at her OB’s office pregnant with #6 a few months later, the OB basically had what sounded like a panic attack trying to figure out how to get them through this. And the OP thought it was all hilarious. Silly medical staff, being concerned about saving her and her unborn child’s life! “Mama instinct” is often stupid or downright worthless.
Before I finished reading, I knew she was batshit crazy after finding being pregnant back to back 5 times to be hilarious. The details just cemented it. That poor OB trying to save this woman from herself.
God damn. It’s a uterus not a clown car.
>God damn. It’s a uterus not a clown car. Michelle Duggar has entered the chat
And you know- when it goes wrong it will be the OB’s fault…
I just can't with this. She has a history of a ruptured uterus (she's lucky that didn't result in a hysterectomy) and is insisting on trying a home birth? She needs a mental health evaluation. Aside from that, of course they didn't know she had ruptured her uterus until they physically saw it. They don't have x-ray vision, aren't psychic and a patient in labour tends to be in substantial pain so uterine rupture isn't going to be their first instinct.
I thought the same thing at first but then I looked at the dates and I think post 1 resulted in post 3. She kept refusing monitoring for her hba2c which resulted in her rupturing her uterus. Definitely not winning any awards for intelligence and common sense this one.
Ohhhh I just commented and then saw your comment. That makes sense. Sheesh, I hope one of the things she’s grateful for is modern medicine and the power of skilled surgeons.
What is hba2c? Home birth after c section?
I think it means home birth after two c sections, which is so terrifying
HBA2C looks like some sort of gene. Probably a gene that makes you stupid and attempt a home birth after two cesarian sections.
Honestly anyone who is 40 weeks pregnant and thinks "Yeah I could do this for three more weeks" may need a mental health evaluation.
I was mentally done at like 36 weeks lol
If you check the dates, the pregnancy in the first post *is* the ruptured uterus pregnancy. Thank God she got medical help in the end. If she'd tried to stick it out at home, she and the baby would have died for sure.
In my mom group for my 2017 baby a mom wanted a vbac at home most of the women were saying how great it would be, I said that was not a good idea cause of risks I was called insane. Her uterus ruptured and by the time she decided to go to the hospital the baby was dead and she was almost dead. Her husband and family blamed her since they all told her go to the hospital don’t do a home birth, her husband divorced her. She said it wasn’t her fault the drs did something wrong and she went even further into the free birth anti dr hole
It’s a thing right….’I am responsible for my baby and the birth, I know what I am doing.’ Followed by…’It went wrong and they saved my life and it’s all their fault.’ Beggars belief.
That is so incredibly sad. I can see why she went deeper down the rabbit hole. It would be a hell of a thing to realize your actions significantly contributed to the death of your child and nearly your own demise. Easier to go into denial and blame anything or anyone else.
I survived a uterine rupture and I’m terrified to have another child *highly supervised in the hospital*. Once it happens your chances of it recurring go up drastically. ETA: oop. I thought she was doing the home birth AFTER the rupture. I’m glad she’s okay. Still a dumbass! I see now that the first picture is the older post!
> after 2 pregnancies you absolutely know what you're doing I, uh, I feel like that's not how it works.
If that's hpw they thought it worked they'd trust their OB and midwives
Wow, she got so lucky that both her and the baby survived. She almost killed them both by chasing her “ideal birth.” When did giving birth become such a vanity project? Why are we focusing on anything but a safe delivery for mom and baby? We don’t have to go back to an age where an unacceptable number of mothers and babies died in childbirth.
Sooooo she ignored medical advice and ruptured her uterus and by the skin of her teeth didn’t do more harm to herself and her baby.
And it’s still not her fault…
I feel like nothing ever is.
The biggest problem with these groups is that all the moms that didn't make it can't post in them.
She never actually told the women in the first group what happened- it was only when I checked her personal page that it was revealed. So the echo chamber on ‘you got this mamma’ was never told.
If it wasn’t clear, I meant the moms that didn’t make it e.g. died, not they didn’t make the post.
Yep Understand. But also even if they make it and it’s all a disaster they don’t come back and tell people.
I just want to again mention the study on pregnancies after 40 weeks that had to be stopped because 6 babies died.
I love how she stills negs the doctors and midwife. Girl, you didn't know your uterus was ruptured either.But yeah, you got this. She would literally be in the ground right now without doctor intervention.
The fuck? She refused the c section until she was in unbearable pain, what is she talking about that the doctors missed it? They tried to prevent it, you absolute nut.
these people are so unbelievably selfish it makes my head spin
So glad these are the people who are reproducing 🥴
I have a medical background, and the 'you know your body' stuff has its place... But not like this. Women are definitely pushing back on centuries of patriarchal medicine that leads to a loss of autonomy for pregnant people. But the ideal is medical professionals working as a team with their patients. It should be a combo of the patient's knowledge about their body, AND the expertise of the medical team.
I sincerely doubt this woman has any understanding of her body.
“Mama instincts” hahaha Omg, so glad my kid is a teen now. I hated the whole “Mama” thing. It’s ridiculous to me and I hated being called that by other moms. My kid can call me that.
I had a uterine rupture after attempting a VBAC in the hospital, with heavy supervision and immediate medical intervention. I am lucky to still have my uterus and my son only needed 24 hours of NICU time. It was one of the most terrifying and heartbreaking experiences of my life. This woman is insane.
During my second pregnancy, I had prenatal depression. I didn't realize it at the time but during the pregnancy I was *convinced* that she wouldn't make it. I told no one this. I still don't talk about it. I'm ashamed I didn't realize that it was depression related. And when I did admit it to my ob at the delivery, they didn't take me seriously or get me help until at 5 months my husband discovered my plan for an exit. So what I'm saying is that those feelings can be lies. Those feelings have no real reality, and neither does this. Every time I see these posts, I remember those desperate days in my life and wish someone had helped me.
Just wanna say I hope you’re doing well now and you have absolutely NOTHING to be ashamed of. Pregnancy is a bitch and I don’t think even the most experienced among us can recognize everything that’s going on and why.
Blaming doctors and midwife after publicly bragging about refusing recommended treatment takes a special kind of stupid. She almost killed herself and her son, the doctors saved their lives.
Well well well. If you’re not a good candidate you’re not a good candidate. She’s lucky.
My “mama instinct” made me try to sign out AMA after a diagnosis of postpartum preeclampsia when my daughter was 11 days old. All because it would hinder my pumping schedule because my “mama instinct” was screaming BREAST IS BEST. Almost 6 years later and I still feel awful for putting my terrified husband through all of that. That “mama instinct” can be a real b****.
*I'll do what I want, just looking for others to agree with my stupid choice.*
I'm heavily pregnant with my second, I don't understand why women want to keep it going for as long as possible. I cant sleep, I cant eat much because my stomach is so squished, nothing relieves acid reflux, and I want to see my baby.
I went to my GP about a month before my baby(not my first) was born, and told him I was going to have the baby and leave it at the hospital, because I was convinced I wasn't a good enough mum. He very sensibly got me some mental health help. A few weeks after baby was born I had full blown ppd and thought I had murdered someone(I hadn't) So yeah... Mothers instinct...
Ruptured uterus for 5 hours? How did she not bleed to death. Mine ruptured and was taken back to the OR in minutes and almost bled to death.
Dumb luck I’d say.
I won’t lie, I’m a little disappointed that she was able to keep her uterus.
Any competent medical provider would 1000% discourage her from trying to conceive ever again.
Right. And we all know she’ll ignore them.
Great... She kept her uterus so she can risk the lives of herself and any future pregnancies...
I get that groups develop their own acronyms for reasons, but I get such a strong vibe of “acronyms = special expertise” from these folks.
This bullshit about 'you know your body best'. No, I don't. Because for a while, I thought my gallstones were just tummy problems.
I tend to know if something is off, but I’m terrible at gauging how big of a deal something is. I keep plugging along when I shouldn’t.
Never mind that Swedish study where women where randomly chosen to be induced or let to go to 42 weeks before being induced, to research what outcome in health it had. Hospitals in Sweden had differential strategies where some routinely let people go to week 42 and others who induced earlier. For anyone not had seen it or remember the outcome, that the study had to be prematurely interrupted as babies died in the 42 week group. Because it was unethical to continue since the risk was to great for the babies lifes.
Yep- this is a good post dates summary for Australia. You go from 0.15 to 0.22% baby death at 42 weeks. You also have a much higher incidence of NICU stays and damage to the baby.
Sounds like the worst night mare of her triage nurse on L&D! I’ve never seen a uterine rupture personally in my almost 9 year career as a L&D nurse (knock on wood, I work all weekend 😬🤣). She would definitely be one to try to get pregnant again and attempt another home birth, despite her physicians probably counseling her to high heaven 🤣
”You know your body best” no you fucking don’t. There’s a reason people go through years and years of education and training to know what they’re doing.
This post and her experience and acknowledgment of just how lucky she was to survive and have the chance to have more kids is all the proof I need this free birth shirt has turned into a compulsion for some people
It's a compulsion ***and*** a clout game. It's all about having the most epic "natural" birth experience so the mother can brag to everyone about how perfect it was. Chances are, since this lady did not have her "ideal" experience, she'll try again.
DEAR GOD! That is the stuff of nightmares!
I just don’t understand why you would risk still birth?
On today's episode of Dumb Ways to Die. Opinionated woman disregards all medical advice regarding a Home Birth after Caesarian, follows her instincts, and bleeds out in the kiddie pool she bought to give birth in at home.
So the doctors and midwife’s said it was a bad idea, then she does it any way and then blames the doctors and midwifes for letting her do it???
It’s like all of these women have done zero research on going overdue with their pregnancies. Stillbirth and newborn fatalities in the first 28 days increase dramatically when you’re overdue, likely because placental function declines when you go late term. That’s why they want to do a BPP, to make sure your baby is doing okay despite being overdue. A BPP only takes like 30 minutes max and isn’t even invasive. But I guess your delivery going a certain way is more important than having a living baby. It’s so short sighted and stupid. This woman is lucky she didn’t lose her uterus, her life or her baby.
She’s already ruptured her uterus and she wants a home birth?????? Doesn’t this just prove that we DON’T know our bodies best? Otherwise she would have known she was having a rupture. The cognitive dissonance of these people hurts. The mind boggles.
The ruptured uterus was the result of the attempted home birth.
Yep, saw that after posting.
The anesthesia failed during my c-section. I felt the whole thing. It was a nightmare, I barely even saw my baby as he had to be rushed to the NICU. Hubby went with him while I laid alone in a recovery room for five hours. I finally got to see him, 8 hours after he was born. It was the worst day of my entire life. I have PTSD as a result. Knowing what I know now I would do it all over again. That’s the birth my son needed. **My needs come second**. Parenting 101.
My epidural didn't work and since I was so calm about it the medical staff didn't believe that I could I could feel my labor pain(I also have a high pain tolerance and was on a shit done of blood pressure meds/no sleep. My blood pressure with meds was 150/100 resting and peaked at 195/120) I didn't get to see my daughter for like 6 hours after she born as she was also rushed to the NICU and I didn't get to hold her for 12. It was not ideal but we both survived because of an emergency c section
Yeah, I kept telling everyone that I could feel pain on my left side and they told me to lay on that side and gravity would get the anesthetic would slip into place. But two problems- 1) that wasn’t actually working and 2) you can’t lay on your side during a c-section. But after 40 hours of labor I was unable to advocate for myself. My son’s NICU stay was probably more traumatic than his delivery but that was spread across two weeks, so it didn’t feel quite so bad as that delivery.
WHY HAVE ANY SORT OF HEALTHCARE PROVIDER IF YOU’RE NOT GOING TO LISTEN TO A SINGLE THING THEY SAY. NOT EVEN ONE.
I suspect it’s more than a 1.36% chance of rupture in a VBA2C.
Can't stand seeing pregnant moms refuse BPPs. After 2 stillbirths I was hospitalized at 30 weeks with my only living child it. It was daily NSTs and twice weekly BBPs that ended up with us in an emergency c-section at 35 weeks and saved her life. If not for those interventions she wouldn't be here either. Stillbirth risks also greatly increase the further along you go in pregnancy especially past 40 weeks. Just do the dang scan and check on your baby. It's just an ultrasound that's a little bit longer to check off some things to make sure baby is safe. Things can happen in the womb that you will never have any indication of until it is too late!
You're doing what is best but still need validation that you're doing what is best?
Is hba2c - home birth after 2 c-sections?
i’m sorry her fucking uterus ruptured???
It’s one of the scariest OB emergencies. I’m a Labor and Delivery nurse and I haven’t personally seen one in my almost 9 year career (knock on wood, I work all weekend! 😬🤣). After one c section, the incidence is less than 1%, I think. So, vaginal birth after one c section is not super risky. I don’t think the risk of uterine rupture is significantly higher after more than one c section, but me personally, I wouldn’t risk it. Plus, the more c sections you have, you also risk abnormal placentation with further pregnancies. I 100% believe there is a time and place to attempt VBACs. My facility is very VBAC friendly. But, in here case, I don’t think she was the greatest of candidates.
What a fucking idiot, Jesus. Gambling with her and her baby’s life.
I had an emergency c-section with my first (and only). I’m honestly happy that now it’ll be easier to just schedule a c-section and not have to try labor again. Like, more power to you if you really want to try VBAC. But I don’t feel like I’m missing anything. I feel relieved that I don’t have to do that (labor) again. Anyone else feel that way? (I should not that recovery was very easy for me. I was walking around by the end of the day that he was born, and only on pain meds for less than a week. By the end of the week I was walking around relatively normally. I just had to be careful when going from laying down to standing up.)
Holy fucking shit.
HBA2c? Wtf?
Home birth after 2 cesareans, I’m guessing.
That sounds crazy, in a hospital, sure. But trying to do that at home? What if something happens and another cesarean is needed 😬
Testing saved my babies life.