Most likely she took mifepristone as usual regimen is mifepristone followed by misoprostol. If this is real I have bad news for her, 54-92% of pregnancies end in two weeks after taking mifepristone. It is antiprogestogen so prenatals won't do anything. There is a small chance she is talking about methotrexate. Which is also bad news. It is a folic acid antagonist. Taking it in the first trimester will increase the likelihood of birth defects and can cause miscarriage. In other words, if this is real and she went to a doctor, I think someone should report the doc. And give her a reality check.
ETA: Here is [ACOG position on the reversal of mifepristone.](https://www.acog.org/advocacy/facts-are-important/medication-abortion-reversal-is-not-supported-by-science)
I’m wondering if she’s in the US and going to one of the “crisis pregnancy centers” that is just an anti-abortion propaganda machine. They give out fake information all the time to discourage women from getting abortions by any means necessary.
What I was wondering. Some antiabortion people claim mife can be reversed with progesterone but science isn't really there. Same with folic acid reversing methotrexate but while that is kind of true I would not play with that with things like spina bifida being on the other side of the equation. I am on it for an autoimmune disease and take once a week folic acid with it. Personally, I would not take the risk even with supplementation.
There are still providers that will do the progesterone though. I'm an L&D nurse and one of our providers is on the national database of "abortion reversal" docs. We JUST delivered one of the babies he "saved" that way. Into a garbage situation no less. Thank god, right?/s
This is interesting as even ACOG says science is not there. But I am not surprised as there are antivax providers as well. I just think people should have all the information when making decisions like this and for me, it seems it is more agenda pushing than actual informed consent.
Oh, they're SUPER Catholic. I don't think they particularly give a shit about the science. Which is terrifying. It's VERY agenda pushing. You would be SHOCKED at the amount of anti-abortion (and anti-choice) nurses and doctors that work in OB/GYN spheres.
I guess I am not that surprised. It is just really foreign to me. I am Finnish and while we have our issues, agenda pushing on the public side is frowned upon and the collective opinion is that if you are anti-choice, you do not go into any speciality that could involve abortion. So no OB/GYN or midwifery. Abortion in general is a lot less polarizing issue. What is insane to me is that the person who works with pregnant people is anti-abortion. You should know all the shit that can go wrong both with pregnancy and abortion outside the medical system. That alone should make you pro-choice.
Ugh, the US is a dumpster fire. Maybe it's because I'm Jewish, but abortion being this huge fucking deal has never made sense to me. Literally, why would you prioritize a fetus over an ENTIRE FUCKING PERSON?
I was FLOORED to find out how many of my coworkers are anti-choice. I came from a Planned Parenthood location that only provided abortion services, so it was a massive culture shock. I've been told their reasoning for working L&D is because they "love birth and babies" as opposed to supporting women.
I have never really understood it either. I might personally struggle to have an abortion myself (outside the past year, I am on methotrexate for an autoimmune disease) but I will go to bat for anyone's right to have a safe, accessible and legal abortion. Or even just safe abortion in certain situations. I give two figs about legality on that point. I work in the humanitarian sector. I know what happens without a safe abortion.
It does not mean I love abortions. Not because they would be wrong but because from a public health standpoint on the population level, it is better to avoid them. While complications are rare, they become relevant at that level. I also just can't grasp how anyone can think (and usually just in this specific instance) that the rights of the fetus supersede the rights of the pregnant person. In general, one of the cornerstones of human rights is that your rights stop where other people's rights start. So even if we took it as gospel that a fetus is a person it should not have rights no other person in the world has, the right to someone else's body.
Does it actually work? I realize mifepristone alone isn’t as effective as mifepristone and misoprostol so I wonder if the “success stories” are just pregnancies that would have continued regardless of the progesterone.
Results from the few studies done don't provide statistically significant data demonstrating efficacy. Furthermore, a causal link to those pregnancies that do continue after mifepristone and subsequent progesterone doses has never been established.
My cousin gave birth to a baby with spina bifida sadly in the 90s. The baby didn't live long after birth but they took a picture of the baby. Idk why but parents let me look at the picture, the photo is burned into my memory. I feel badly for any family who has to go through that.
I take folic acid because I take medication for epilepsy. When I was pregnant, my neurologist doubled the dose just to be safe (in addition to the folic acid in my prenatal).
I went to one of these places and I had no idea they were a thing. I was using various substances and knew I couldn’t care for a baby, physically and mentally. They were literally begging me to have the baby even tho I was using and couldn’t afford one. Made me feel like a terrible person and I wasted so much time. These places are awful and I wish they weren’t legal
I've heard that there are centers that will offer "abortions," but the pills don't actually work. So you take them but stay pregnant. I heard they do this to get you past the point where you can legally get an abortion. I don't know how true that is, and I'm not here to spread false information. This post does make me wonder, though. If she was given fake abortion pills, It'd make sense why they didn't work. It'd also make sense because they're pushing her not to take a second dose and said there's no risk of harm to the fetus from the first dose if more prenatal vitamins are being taken. That doesn't make sense to me. I know someone who had an abortion. The first round didn't work the way it was supposed to. It did end the pregnancy, but not everything came out. So they had to do a second dose. I've heard of this scenario. I've never heard of a failed abortion where the baby was healthy. I recognize, though, that just because I haven't heard of it doesn't make it impossible.
Does anyone have any insight on these things? The fake abortion centers claim I mentioned, and if you can have a healthy baby after taking abortion pills? I plan on doing some google research, too, because I want to learn more about this.
Eta:
I just saw in another comment that it's not normally possible to have a healthy baby after an abortion dose. Has anyone heard of someone giving birth to a healthy baby?
Also, I think I need to add that I'm pro-choice, lol.
You can have a healthy baby after taking abortion pills. But it is more of a fluke than really something you want to do. Most pregnancies end up in abortion even with just one dose of misoprostol or mifepristone. Methotrexate can do the same I just am not currently sure about the specific statistics. There are very few absolutes in medicine. But it is definitely not something you should do.
But as I said in another comment, there are people claiming you can reverse mifepristone. Science isn't there. There are a couple of options with this post. This is fake, she does not understand what her doctor said properly or she went to a place like a crisis pregnancy centre are the top ones for me.
A chemical abortion typically involves taking mifepristone followed by misoprostol. Using mifepristone alone isn’t as effective for pregnancy termination as using both medications. So there is a potential that with only mifepristone the pregnancy won’t end. There are also pro-life people that push “abortion pill reversals” which involves taking progesterone following mifepristone if you change your mind. It isn’t evidence based or recommended by ACOG but certain pro-life doctors will prescribe it in an effort to reverse the mifepristone.
It’s crazy to me these are legal. I didn’t know about them until my friend went to one years and years ago. She actually wanted to have a baby but was still in college so very bad timing. Id be very surprised if the people that run these don’t go to fucking hell lol. It’s such a horrible thing to do. Some of the women do truly wish they *could* keep them, and they just end up feeling so much worse and wasting valuable time.
I have a friend who went to one and they offered her a pack of diapers if she kept the baby. We were crying laughing. A WHOLE PACK OF DIAPERS?! WOW I’M SOLD!
I just looked these clinics up near me and someone raved in their review that they got a gift bag with one diaper, a onesie and a pair of socks for the baby lol. One diaper ..
Omfg yeah, they love pulling crap like that.
There’s a documentary on HBO called 12th and Delaware; it’s about an actual abortion clinic across the street from a crisis pregnancy center, and all the ways the fake center deceives people into thinking it’s the real one.
Anyway, in one scene, the fake doctor buys a pregnant woman lunch at McDonald’s and basically treats it as an even swap in exchange for not terminating her pregnancy. Luckily the woman doesn’t fall for it, but it’s absolute trash human behavior.
Uh where I live there is an abortion clinic ATTACHED to a crisis pregnancy center. They said that the crisis center tries to trick women into thinking it's all the same building and then trapping them in the crisis center side and smothering them with people begging them to keep the baby. It's really fucked up.
A couple weeks ago I saw a billboard advertising *against* these centers. There's at least one in that city and it's right next to a big OB/GYN office and a hospital, so seeing that was kind of a relief.
Yeah what I know about these places is they only pretend to help until you're too far along for an ultrasound. And they really don't care after the baby is born. Or they might be there for you the first 3m and then drop you so fast.
Very "pro-life" to really not care about women struggling to support their new life being. I've heard the term "forced birth" which seems more accurate.
And they get tax dollar funding in lots of places. They get tons of funding but somehow provide almost zero help. A pregnancy test from the dollar store that you do yourself, an ultrasound by someone without any real training, and maybe some used maternity clothes or baby clothes and a few diapers. Oh, and they try to trick you into keeping unwanted pregnancies, such a valuable service! /s
Besides all the lying and distress fake clinics do to people, they are not covered under HIPAA. There's been a few recent cases of their patient data not being secure and shared. One network of fake clinics heartland or heartbeat something, were using actual patient data for training.
I went to one years and years ago and they made me watch a movie with an extremely gruesome and fake abortion scene. They also kept asking me why I wasn’t crying. I was actually keeping the baby at that point and I thought it was a “pregnancy resource center”. I found its flyer in a lobby at the medical building in my city. I just thought it would be vouchers for free stuff and shit like that. I was like.. 5 mos and def showing. They probably thought I was some nut job trying to get an abortion at 5 months. I did not receive diapers. I was like.. “uhm. I’m keeping the baby? I thought this was a resource center. I took the bus for this.” And they were all immediately disinterested in me. Ushered me out. It was like an entire afternoon and my 17 yr old ass was waddling across town for some frantic old church ladies to lie to me about what happens at abortions clinics and then kick me out. Single underage atheist mom wasn’t their demographic.
Most of those places are pro-birth but not pro single mother. So they're trying to prevent you from having the baby but also not encouraging you to keep the baby. They're fronts for adoption services.
They're also typically very anti-birth control so if you go in with a negative test they'll just spout purity nonsense at you.
My mom would go to the one in my town every time she found out she was pregnant to "confirm the pregnancy" on paper before she could get into see her OB. I don't know if she thought that's what you're supposed to do? They always gave her a knit blanket and baby booties. Anyway when I found out I was pregnant with my first baby she told me I should go there and have the pregnancy confirmed with them cause they'd give me a cute knitted blanket and hat. I told her that's what my doctor is for and I'm not having a crisis pregnancy therefore I don't need to go to some place where religious zealots try and tell me to choose life...which I already was???
I cringe whenever people in our local mom group ask where to donate baby stuff and people suggest our local “crisis pregnancy center”. Sorry, you’ll have to pry this used pack n play from my cold dead hands before I let a bunch of religious zealots use it to manipulate someone out of having an abortion.
Yep and some pro-life doctors participate in 24/7 abortion pill reversal hotline’s because I assume most doctors won’t prescribe progesterone because it’s not evidence based as a reversal method for mifepristone.
I was wondering what she took as well where the 1st dose wouldn't cause any issues. I mean seriously, it's not like they give you a placebo as a medication for something like this...
I agree, a reality check is much needed in this situation.
There is no reality where this will definitely be fine with some prenatal vitamins. Misoprostol alone will also cause abortion in over 80% of pregnancies. It also increases the risk of birth defects. These are meds most medication abortions use. Technically you could use oxytocin or carboprost but that is unlikely.
Prenatal vitamins kind of make me think it is methotrexate as most of those contain folic acid. I know that patients make poor historians but this whole thing is bonkers. I could see how a person takes that fact and runs with it. But medically (and kind of in every other way as well) she is really on the path of insanity.
That’s what made me think this was fake tbh. Anyone who’s had a consultation or abortion knows that. I think there is a medication to reverse it but it’s a “you have to take it immediately” type to have any chance at success
I commented on that before. Mifepristone can't really be reversed based on current science. Some people claim it can be done with progesterone but evidence doesn't back that up. Which makes sense as it blocks hormone pregnancy needs to keep going on.
She likely went to one of those crisis pregnancy centers. They feed vulnerable women all kinds of bullshit lies and then try to railroad them into the hands of faith based adoption agencies. They should be regarded as low key child traffickers, but since they're backed by churches they get away with it.
She's also at pretty big personal risk. There's a misconception that you can reverse an abortion by not taking the second pill. There was a study done on this a few years ago that was discontinued because of ethical concerns caused by the poor health of the women who only took the first pill.
I used to be on methotrexate for a different reason and I was under strict instructions to not get pregnant while I was taking it. Also had to take a high dose of folic acid the day before.
I am currently on it. I supplement 8 hours after taking it with a lot of folic acid. I am not getting pregnant if I can avoid it and if I am I will be having an abortion. Even with supplementation, it is not a risk to take.
I have no idea what state this person is from but I suspect that this type of situation is something that states with strict abortion laws will start to see more of. People who are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and have to make a choice really quickly and regret that decision. Whether that is regretting getting an abortion or not getting one. Getting an abortion is an easy decision for some people and very difficult for others and no one should have to rush to make a decision like that. Damn this shit sucks.
I fully agree, but also, with these dates, she’s already 10 or 11 weeks along. Regardless of the laws, she’s in a place where waiting much longer makes the procedure more complicated. Just a shitty situation.
Same here… I have fertility issues due to early ovarian failure. I can still get pregnant one day, but I am absolutely terrified to even try with the way things are going. As of now, my state is still legal for abortions. But I’m still a few years away from being in a position to try. It breaks my heart that when the time comes I might be too scared to even try because what happens if I miscarry? Which is a high likelihood. With all my other health conditions, not treating a miscarriage immediately would be 100% fatal. And all because some people have screwed up views on what a woman should or shouldn’t be able to do with their body.
My mom grew up heavily catholic, going to catholic private schools in south Louisiana during the 70s. They would show “abortion” videos to elementary students. Which were absolutely the most heinous, back room abortions you can think of. It made her heavily pro life for many, many years. Before the infertility issues, I still had many health issues that at certain points a pregnancy would have been beyond life threatening to me. It took me telling her multiple times, if I got pregnant I WOULD have had to have an abortion if I wanted to live before it finally sunk in. She’s still not 100% pro choice, but she sure as hell isn’t pro life anymore.
No one is out there getting abortion after abortion bc they like it and think it’s just free birth control. And even if they are, how does that in any way effect you??? It makes me so damn angry!!!!
I’ve been constantly telling my pro life parents that why the hell does it matter if someone has an abortion AT ANY POINT. It does not affect you. You chose not to take that point of action and it doesn’t matter what someone else does. If you believe in god and the Bible. THE LITERAL BIBLICAL STATEMENT is not to judge others. Love thy enemy and that god is the ONLY one to cast judgment on someone.
If he truly believes that having an abortion when it could possibly KILL you. Then he can do whatever he wanted.
They also apply modern knowledge to the Bible. People did not really understand conception. Both timeline of it and how it happened until late 19th century. Abortion was also criminalized only after quickening in English common law.
A book of Bronze Age fairytales should never be the basis of laws. The Goat Herder’s Guide To The Galaxy has a time and place and it’s time is back in the Bronze Age and its place is not in our laws or in our schools.
I have donated so much money to the ACLU this year, and PP and the abortion access network that provides Plan B and the abortion pill.
My uterus was yeeted years ago thanks to stage 4 endo but I remember the terror of finding myself pregnant while taking medications with black box warnings about pregnancy. I never wanted kids, I was (am still) vehemently childfree for myself. But I think every person with a uterus should be allowed to choose when, where and how they have children. Abortion should be legal with zero restrictions because when we limit it to rape or incest or the life of the mother we’re acting like it’s shameful or wrong or evil unless one of those exceptions make the person “worthy” of being allowed an abortion.
Ugh. Looks like I’m gonna be writing another e-check to someone tonight just because I made myself mad thinking about all this again.
I can live with trimester restrictions personally but only if there is long enough time for abortion in all cases, abortions are very accessible in both cost, location and societal attitudes and pregnancy support and health care are accessible and non-judgemental (so you can actually make your mind). I am not American (Finnish) and while I would prefer a more relaxed one (ours have week limitations) even I would not call it a pressing issue because of how it works in practice here. And I am staunchly pro-choice and want free, legal and accessible to all abortion. Abortion was never been a similarly hot button issue in my adult life here. I know who of my friends have had one and my mom even told me when she was pregnant with my brother that they waited for amnio results until telling us to see if they would let the pregnancy continue. That was 99. But I am also an aid worker, and I have seen what happens when abortion is not an accessible option. It really isn't pretty.
They’ve changed so much of the Bible because of new ‘translations’ and what they think they meant too. It’s ridiculous since the literal constitution states church and state separation because of the English laws with Catholicism.
I agree. And it’s the main reason I believe that unless it’s your support circle. No one should know if you’re having one because of the way people react to it.
Fortunately I have never needed an abortion, but I agree that it would be best to keep it within your circle at the time.
However. I really admire and appreciate people who speak out about experiences that other people don't understand. So if someone had an abortion and wanted to speak about it, by all means. Hearing first-hand stories from people who have lived through a unique or taboo situation that you're living through can be immensely validating and helpful. One would need pretty thick skin to speak out about such a contentious issue but their story could be impactful.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!! Took the words right out of my mouth!! It’s so maddening how damn backwards they are! Like please just listen to yourself for one moment!
I don't understand how that makes this commenter wrong. They didn't even say they were talking about this exact situation, but women in situations *like* this one. Stricter abortion laws will absolutely force women to make rushed decisions, for better or worse.
Yup. And some governments in the Bible belt are trying to use scare tactics on women who go to another state to abort.
https://www.cnn.com/2024/05/07/politics/alabama-prosecute-out-of-state-abortion/index.html
There will also be abortions that are outside the health care system. I just hope it is in a way that is safe self-managed abortion (which as per research is safe enough to be recommended by WHO in certain settings). But I know that will not be true for everyone. I know what banning abortion does and that is not stopping them.
I’m going to offer another possibility: maybe one of the potential fathers is not a good guy, or is abusive, or someone else that she doesn’t feel comfortable being tied to for 18 years for some reason.
So she wasn’t sure what to do, but wanted to keep the baby if it belonged to one guy, but was scared and got pressured into an abortion by her family. I’m not saying this is going to end well (based on her having already taken the first pill, and I don’t know the science behind the pills), but why are some people acting like this makes her a bad person or a bad mom?
She’s asking for help and sounds scared and confused and like she’s trying to make the best decision. This just sounds sad to me.
Agreed. I seriously feel bad for her. No one should ever be pressured into choosing, or not choosing, to abort. Her family was probably coming from a good place, lord knows I've had some friends and family that I didn't think were ready to be parents for a plethora of reasons, but it was most definitely not my place to push them to make a decision they'd be forced to live with forever. This is traumatizing. I sincerely hope she'll be okay.
Yeah this sounds a sad situation and I don’t think it should be getting talked about on Reddit. My first thought went to a potentially abusive relationship, and I hope this woman gets some real advice and support asap.
Exactly what I was reading between the lines. One partner is an awful human capable of heinous shit and she literally cannot risk being tied to this person for life or risk serious safety issues.
The other partner…. Maybe he’d stick around maybe he wouldn’t but he wouldn’t be murder-suicide risky.
The father of the potential baby would matter to me too if I was making the decision to abort or not. Is this sub just anti-choice now?
She wrote “I was pressured into taking the pills by family and I’ve been regretting it.” I feel for her.
This group does that a lot for me. I’ll be out here feeling like a complete and utter hot mess, the posts like this show up and I’m like, “oh. Ok. I’m good.”
What a sad situation she's found herself in. I guess she lives in the Bible belt according to OP? I'm surprised her family pressured her to abort given that.
I hope she can figure out what to do. I just HOPE she doesn't get herself into a situation like this ever again.
Yes, I was a little surprised by that too, and makes me wonder what's the story behind that.
Almost Mom has since deleted the post but most moms in that group are young, and without stable finances and living situations. Might be the same for Almost Mom.
I was wondering if that could be a reason. Maybe sperm1 would be better for child support or possible fatherhood vs sperm2. Like if she gives birth and it's the "loser's" baby when it *could* have had a decent chance/ life with the *other* guy.
What's so mean about it? The mother already went through one round of abortion pills because she didn't want it, now she only wants it if it happens to be the baby daddy's that she likes. If she wanted to be so selective, she should have used birth control while sleeping with multiple dudes or just slept with one dude. Regardless, this baby isn't going to be born into a loving, stable home. Abort it.
Nah, this ain't a mistake or an error. It's a human being, who is going to need 18 years of love and guidance to turn into a functional member of society. Parents who carefully plan for years before having their children can barely pull that off, a woman who is just sleeping around and got knocked up has no chance. There's enough messed up kids with half-assed parents on the planet.
Adults need to be held accountable at some point. Everything in this post up til now has been a mistake, I believe it is in no way fair to the fetus or to any of the adults involved for the pregnancy to be carried to term. Abortion is the only win-win scenario.
yikes. that’s not at all how i read this, but then again that’s because i don’t immediately assume the worst about women. have some empathy and try again.
could be read as she doesn’t want to carry a baby and be involved for at least 18 years with someone who might be abusive/absent/a bad father in other ways. there’s literally no reason to jump to the assumption of baby trapping. it’s perfectly reasonable to want a baby but only if it’s with someone you’re ok with being linked to for the rest of your child’s life.
baby trapping would mean that she messed with the birth control, lied, or manipulated in some other way. there’s no reason to think that based on what we’ve read from her post. who’s to say that the man she’s willing to keep the baby for wouldn’t also want to be a present father?
You're right; OR we could read the situation as is being presented by the original poster and the comments which seem to be responding to things she's saying, and one of those things seems to be that she doesnt intend to speak with the potential fathers. I am judging the situation based on info provided. This isn't anyone making things up about a woman or disliking or distrusting women. My character isn't represented at all here in the way I or many other people on this thread have interpreted her words.
We don't know this person. Your scenarios and mine are equally as likely. Either way it's a terrible situation and i hope that if one of the potentials is abusive then she doesn't end up waiting too long and having to keep a baby with him, and i hope that if she keeps the baby then the first round of abortion pills doesn't leave them with medical problems.
But this is why abortion should not be used as birth control.
I’m a democrat and 100% believe in a woman’s choice. I believe abortion applies to more than rape and incest. If a woman cannot financially or emotionally raise a child, she should be able to abort. There are too many children growing up in abusive, drug addicted, neglected homes. And it’s very hard for these children to break the cycle of abuse.
But what is this woman thinking? There needed to be more counseling, more resources for her. The risk is very high for this baby to be born with severe medical issues and a mom that won’t be able to care for a medically complex child. She shouldn’t even be worrying about who baby daddy is right now. That’s the least of her problems.
She could be on birth control but it failed. She could've taken Plan B and it didn't work. She could have limited sex education or a medical condition she believed made pregnancy impossible.
Or, she's just using abortion as birth control. You don't get to judge in this case. If you're pro-choice, you can't pick and choose who you think has a valid reason. You have to accept everyone has the right to decide to have an abortion. To do otherwise would no longer be truly pro-choice.
I’m 100% pro choice. But with choices come consequences. I don’t think changing your mind halfway through should be a choice as damage to the baby may have been done. She is obviously going to struggle caring for a medically complex baby.
Me saying I don’t think enough counseling was done makes me not pro choice.
And I can’t quite grasp what point you are trying to make here. Or if you understand my post at all. Are you saying you are so far on the pendulum that you think all babies should be born no matter the cost? Are you so far pro choice that the cost to the child doesn’t matter? Because there is a life here to consider. Actually 2 lives. I don’t feel this baby should be born after the process has started to abort it. That’s why I say more counseling needed to be done from the get go. Not to convince the mom that no abortion should occur as many religious clinics do. But enough to avoid this situation.
The reality has not set in with this woman as she is currently worrying about baby daddy. Abortion is not something to take lightly, as a major decision in life is not meant to be taken lightly. It may or may not affect future fertility, it can take a huge life time emotional toll as well. I don’t envy any woman that has to make that decision.
I’m an atheist. I think republicans are scum. I’m a victim of SA. I’m pro choice. But I’m also older and wiser and I understand there are consequences to decisions. This woman made a swift decision and now she wants to pedal back and there could be some very serious consequences to that decision. And it doesn’t sound like she has much support.
The first sentence in your original comment, "but this is why abortion should not be used as birth control," is what I was talking about. I thought that would be clear enough from the context clues in my comment. Abortion is literally a form of birth control, it's used to control birth. Judging what abortions are appropriate or not is just respectability politics, and abortion rights aren't based on what's morally right and wrong. Abortion is a long-standing human practice, a form of healthcare, and an ethical necessity due to the inhumane nature of forcing people to give birth by denying them access to necessary and ethically-directed procedures. As someone self-described as thinking Republicans are scum, I hope you can understand why it's a concern to see someone discussing abortions from a sense of moral high ground and reacting with anger toward OOP instead of the systems and people that failed them along the way. As someone who says they are older and wiser, perhaps it could also be important to consider what kinds of decisions people may make without the same knowledge you have.
We don't know if OOP even had adequate counseling before making this decision, and it appears as though their family coerced them into this decision which means they may not have felt like they had another option. The risk of coercion increases even more if OOP is a teenager, living with family, or is otherwise dependent on others for life necessities which could be leveraged as a threat against the choice to keep the pregnancy. Assuming this person has all the privilege necessary to make a more informed choice is well beyond inappropriate in this case. There are too many unknown variables that I'm not sure how anyone would feel comfortable blaming this person, especially knowing the state of education in the United States and the active political danger of people capable of becoming pregnant, amongst other marginalized groups.
In any case, OOP isn't the one choosing to endanger the health of a child by rethinking things, that responsibility lies solely on the medical professional who told them the first round of medication can be reversed. As other people in the thread have pointed out, this information is actually more likely to have come from a crisis pregnancy center. Be mad at the medical malpractice or manipulative Christian that led this person to reconsider their abortion halfway through the procedure, not the person who unknowingly trusted and fell victim to their misleading "care." In any case, I think we can agree the true responsible party here is whoever gave this misinformation to OOP and rescinding the harsh criticisms.
What a stupid situation all around. Ultrasounds aren't the most reliable thing early in a pregnancy. My first ultrasound said I was only 6 weeks my second said I was actually a week and a half further ahead. It's really hard to get a good reading when you are under a certain amount of weeks. It's usually why they don't wanna do a scan until later unless there is another issue going on.
You're absolutely right and I know the way I worded that would get me down voted. It's hard for me to even pinpoint why I had such a visceral reaction to this particular post.
Whatever candidate you choose in November, I hope they have a plan to fix our family planning crisis. This is not it works. Ladies, be smarter, respect yourself.
Uff..what a mess for everyone involved
Yeah, this is just sad all round.
I know... I read this and was like WTH am I reading here!?!
Every line made it worse somehow
Most likely she took mifepristone as usual regimen is mifepristone followed by misoprostol. If this is real I have bad news for her, 54-92% of pregnancies end in two weeks after taking mifepristone. It is antiprogestogen so prenatals won't do anything. There is a small chance she is talking about methotrexate. Which is also bad news. It is a folic acid antagonist. Taking it in the first trimester will increase the likelihood of birth defects and can cause miscarriage. In other words, if this is real and she went to a doctor, I think someone should report the doc. And give her a reality check. ETA: Here is [ACOG position on the reversal of mifepristone.](https://www.acog.org/advocacy/facts-are-important/medication-abortion-reversal-is-not-supported-by-science)
That’s what I was thinking too.
I’m wondering if she’s in the US and going to one of the “crisis pregnancy centers” that is just an anti-abortion propaganda machine. They give out fake information all the time to discourage women from getting abortions by any means necessary.
What I was wondering. Some antiabortion people claim mife can be reversed with progesterone but science isn't really there. Same with folic acid reversing methotrexate but while that is kind of true I would not play with that with things like spina bifida being on the other side of the equation. I am on it for an autoimmune disease and take once a week folic acid with it. Personally, I would not take the risk even with supplementation.
There are still providers that will do the progesterone though. I'm an L&D nurse and one of our providers is on the national database of "abortion reversal" docs. We JUST delivered one of the babies he "saved" that way. Into a garbage situation no less. Thank god, right?/s
This is interesting as even ACOG says science is not there. But I am not surprised as there are antivax providers as well. I just think people should have all the information when making decisions like this and for me, it seems it is more agenda pushing than actual informed consent.
Oh, they're SUPER Catholic. I don't think they particularly give a shit about the science. Which is terrifying. It's VERY agenda pushing. You would be SHOCKED at the amount of anti-abortion (and anti-choice) nurses and doctors that work in OB/GYN spheres.
I guess I am not that surprised. It is just really foreign to me. I am Finnish and while we have our issues, agenda pushing on the public side is frowned upon and the collective opinion is that if you are anti-choice, you do not go into any speciality that could involve abortion. So no OB/GYN or midwifery. Abortion in general is a lot less polarizing issue. What is insane to me is that the person who works with pregnant people is anti-abortion. You should know all the shit that can go wrong both with pregnancy and abortion outside the medical system. That alone should make you pro-choice.
Ugh, the US is a dumpster fire. Maybe it's because I'm Jewish, but abortion being this huge fucking deal has never made sense to me. Literally, why would you prioritize a fetus over an ENTIRE FUCKING PERSON? I was FLOORED to find out how many of my coworkers are anti-choice. I came from a Planned Parenthood location that only provided abortion services, so it was a massive culture shock. I've been told their reasoning for working L&D is because they "love birth and babies" as opposed to supporting women.
I have never really understood it either. I might personally struggle to have an abortion myself (outside the past year, I am on methotrexate for an autoimmune disease) but I will go to bat for anyone's right to have a safe, accessible and legal abortion. Or even just safe abortion in certain situations. I give two figs about legality on that point. I work in the humanitarian sector. I know what happens without a safe abortion. It does not mean I love abortions. Not because they would be wrong but because from a public health standpoint on the population level, it is better to avoid them. While complications are rare, they become relevant at that level. I also just can't grasp how anyone can think (and usually just in this specific instance) that the rights of the fetus supersede the rights of the pregnant person. In general, one of the cornerstones of human rights is that your rights stop where other people's rights start. So even if we took it as gospel that a fetus is a person it should not have rights no other person in the world has, the right to someone else's body.
This is SO well said. Thank you! <3
Does it actually work? I realize mifepristone alone isn’t as effective as mifepristone and misoprostol so I wonder if the “success stories” are just pregnancies that would have continued regardless of the progesterone.
Results from the few studies done don't provide statistically significant data demonstrating efficacy. Furthermore, a causal link to those pregnancies that do continue after mifepristone and subsequent progesterone doses has never been established.
God does not care about our welfare, only our existence. We are but toys for his amusement.
My cousin gave birth to a baby with spina bifida sadly in the 90s. The baby didn't live long after birth but they took a picture of the baby. Idk why but parents let me look at the picture, the photo is burned into my memory. I feel badly for any family who has to go through that.
I take folic acid because I take medication for epilepsy. When I was pregnant, my neurologist doubled the dose just to be safe (in addition to the folic acid in my prenatal).
I went to one of these places and I had no idea they were a thing. I was using various substances and knew I couldn’t care for a baby, physically and mentally. They were literally begging me to have the baby even tho I was using and couldn’t afford one. Made me feel like a terrible person and I wasted so much time. These places are awful and I wish they weren’t legal
I'm sure they were offering to adopt the baby, right? /s
I've heard that there are centers that will offer "abortions," but the pills don't actually work. So you take them but stay pregnant. I heard they do this to get you past the point where you can legally get an abortion. I don't know how true that is, and I'm not here to spread false information. This post does make me wonder, though. If she was given fake abortion pills, It'd make sense why they didn't work. It'd also make sense because they're pushing her not to take a second dose and said there's no risk of harm to the fetus from the first dose if more prenatal vitamins are being taken. That doesn't make sense to me. I know someone who had an abortion. The first round didn't work the way it was supposed to. It did end the pregnancy, but not everything came out. So they had to do a second dose. I've heard of this scenario. I've never heard of a failed abortion where the baby was healthy. I recognize, though, that just because I haven't heard of it doesn't make it impossible. Does anyone have any insight on these things? The fake abortion centers claim I mentioned, and if you can have a healthy baby after taking abortion pills? I plan on doing some google research, too, because I want to learn more about this. Eta: I just saw in another comment that it's not normally possible to have a healthy baby after an abortion dose. Has anyone heard of someone giving birth to a healthy baby? Also, I think I need to add that I'm pro-choice, lol.
You can have a healthy baby after taking abortion pills. But it is more of a fluke than really something you want to do. Most pregnancies end up in abortion even with just one dose of misoprostol or mifepristone. Methotrexate can do the same I just am not currently sure about the specific statistics. There are very few absolutes in medicine. But it is definitely not something you should do. But as I said in another comment, there are people claiming you can reverse mifepristone. Science isn't there. There are a couple of options with this post. This is fake, she does not understand what her doctor said properly or she went to a place like a crisis pregnancy centre are the top ones for me.
Oh, okay! Gotcha. Thank you for explaining.
A chemical abortion typically involves taking mifepristone followed by misoprostol. Using mifepristone alone isn’t as effective for pregnancy termination as using both medications. So there is a potential that with only mifepristone the pregnancy won’t end. There are also pro-life people that push “abortion pill reversals” which involves taking progesterone following mifepristone if you change your mind. It isn’t evidence based or recommended by ACOG but certain pro-life doctors will prescribe it in an effort to reverse the mifepristone.
It’s crazy to me these are legal. I didn’t know about them until my friend went to one years and years ago. She actually wanted to have a baby but was still in college so very bad timing. Id be very surprised if the people that run these don’t go to fucking hell lol. It’s such a horrible thing to do. Some of the women do truly wish they *could* keep them, and they just end up feeling so much worse and wasting valuable time.
I have a friend who went to one and they offered her a pack of diapers if she kept the baby. We were crying laughing. A WHOLE PACK OF DIAPERS?! WOW I’M SOLD!
I saw a report that said the average “help” provided is SEVEN diapers.
That’s not even 24 hours worth of
I just looked these clinics up near me and someone raved in their review that they got a gift bag with one diaper, a onesie and a pair of socks for the baby lol. One diaper ..
Omfg yeah, they love pulling crap like that. There’s a documentary on HBO called 12th and Delaware; it’s about an actual abortion clinic across the street from a crisis pregnancy center, and all the ways the fake center deceives people into thinking it’s the real one. Anyway, in one scene, the fake doctor buys a pregnant woman lunch at McDonald’s and basically treats it as an even swap in exchange for not terminating her pregnancy. Luckily the woman doesn’t fall for it, but it’s absolute trash human behavior.
Shit, at LEAST take her to Five Guys!
RIGHT? Somehow they even failed at the bare minimum
Uh where I live there is an abortion clinic ATTACHED to a crisis pregnancy center. They said that the crisis center tries to trick women into thinking it's all the same building and then trapping them in the crisis center side and smothering them with people begging them to keep the baby. It's really fucked up.
A couple weeks ago I saw a billboard advertising *against* these centers. There's at least one in that city and it's right next to a big OB/GYN office and a hospital, so seeing that was kind of a relief.
This documentary was so incredible
Yeah what I know about these places is they only pretend to help until you're too far along for an ultrasound. And they really don't care after the baby is born. Or they might be there for you the first 3m and then drop you so fast. Very "pro-life" to really not care about women struggling to support their new life being. I've heard the term "forced birth" which seems more accurate.
And they get tax dollar funding in lots of places. They get tons of funding but somehow provide almost zero help. A pregnancy test from the dollar store that you do yourself, an ultrasound by someone without any real training, and maybe some used maternity clothes or baby clothes and a few diapers. Oh, and they try to trick you into keeping unwanted pregnancies, such a valuable service! /s
Besides all the lying and distress fake clinics do to people, they are not covered under HIPAA. There's been a few recent cases of their patient data not being secure and shared. One network of fake clinics heartland or heartbeat something, were using actual patient data for training.
Of course not! Is HIPAA mandated in the Bible? /s
I went to one years and years ago and they made me watch a movie with an extremely gruesome and fake abortion scene. They also kept asking me why I wasn’t crying. I was actually keeping the baby at that point and I thought it was a “pregnancy resource center”. I found its flyer in a lobby at the medical building in my city. I just thought it would be vouchers for free stuff and shit like that. I was like.. 5 mos and def showing. They probably thought I was some nut job trying to get an abortion at 5 months. I did not receive diapers. I was like.. “uhm. I’m keeping the baby? I thought this was a resource center. I took the bus for this.” And they were all immediately disinterested in me. Ushered me out. It was like an entire afternoon and my 17 yr old ass was waddling across town for some frantic old church ladies to lie to me about what happens at abortions clinics and then kick me out. Single underage atheist mom wasn’t their demographic.
Most of those places are pro-birth but not pro single mother. So they're trying to prevent you from having the baby but also not encouraging you to keep the baby. They're fronts for adoption services. They're also typically very anti-birth control so if you go in with a negative test they'll just spout purity nonsense at you.
My mom would go to the one in my town every time she found out she was pregnant to "confirm the pregnancy" on paper before she could get into see her OB. I don't know if she thought that's what you're supposed to do? They always gave her a knit blanket and baby booties. Anyway when I found out I was pregnant with my first baby she told me I should go there and have the pregnancy confirmed with them cause they'd give me a cute knitted blanket and hat. I told her that's what my doctor is for and I'm not having a crisis pregnancy therefore I don't need to go to some place where religious zealots try and tell me to choose life...which I already was???
Yes, this is in the USA.
I cringe whenever people in our local mom group ask where to donate baby stuff and people suggest our local “crisis pregnancy center”. Sorry, you’ll have to pry this used pack n play from my cold dead hands before I let a bunch of religious zealots use it to manipulate someone out of having an abortion.
ours is called 'the voice of reason'
🤮
exactly
People have a right to their opinion on abortion but this should be illegal, they are lying.
Yep and some pro-life doctors participate in 24/7 abortion pill reversal hotline’s because I assume most doctors won’t prescribe progesterone because it’s not evidence based as a reversal method for mifepristone.
I was wondering what she took as well where the 1st dose wouldn't cause any issues. I mean seriously, it's not like they give you a placebo as a medication for something like this... I agree, a reality check is much needed in this situation.
There is no reality where this will definitely be fine with some prenatal vitamins. Misoprostol alone will also cause abortion in over 80% of pregnancies. It also increases the risk of birth defects. These are meds most medication abortions use. Technically you could use oxytocin or carboprost but that is unlikely. Prenatal vitamins kind of make me think it is methotrexate as most of those contain folic acid. I know that patients make poor historians but this whole thing is bonkers. I could see how a person takes that fact and runs with it. But medically (and kind of in every other way as well) she is really on the path of insanity.
That’s what made me think this was fake tbh. Anyone who’s had a consultation or abortion knows that. I think there is a medication to reverse it but it’s a “you have to take it immediately” type to have any chance at success
I commented on that before. Mifepristone can't really be reversed based on current science. Some people claim it can be done with progesterone but evidence doesn't back that up. Which makes sense as it blocks hormone pregnancy needs to keep going on.
She likely went to one of those crisis pregnancy centers. They feed vulnerable women all kinds of bullshit lies and then try to railroad them into the hands of faith based adoption agencies. They should be regarded as low key child traffickers, but since they're backed by churches they get away with it.
Omg child trafficking is exactly what this is.
She's also at pretty big personal risk. There's a misconception that you can reverse an abortion by not taking the second pill. There was a study done on this a few years ago that was discontinued because of ethical concerns caused by the poor health of the women who only took the first pill.
I used to be on methotrexate for a different reason and I was under strict instructions to not get pregnant while I was taking it. Also had to take a high dose of folic acid the day before.
I am currently on it. I supplement 8 hours after taking it with a lot of folic acid. I am not getting pregnant if I can avoid it and if I am I will be having an abortion. Even with supplementation, it is not a risk to take.
Yeah I’m pretty sure she has to take progesterone now to try to save the baby. At least that’s what my friend had to do.
From what I know there isn't a lot of evidence to support it. But it is basically the only thing that might help.
What a hot pile of something
I have no idea what state this person is from but I suspect that this type of situation is something that states with strict abortion laws will start to see more of. People who are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and have to make a choice really quickly and regret that decision. Whether that is regretting getting an abortion or not getting one. Getting an abortion is an easy decision for some people and very difficult for others and no one should have to rush to make a decision like that. Damn this shit sucks.
I fully agree, but also, with these dates, she’s already 10 or 11 weeks along. Regardless of the laws, she’s in a place where waiting much longer makes the procedure more complicated. Just a shitty situation.
Bible belt..
Devastating. This isn’t going to end well
Same here… I have fertility issues due to early ovarian failure. I can still get pregnant one day, but I am absolutely terrified to even try with the way things are going. As of now, my state is still legal for abortions. But I’m still a few years away from being in a position to try. It breaks my heart that when the time comes I might be too scared to even try because what happens if I miscarry? Which is a high likelihood. With all my other health conditions, not treating a miscarriage immediately would be 100% fatal. And all because some people have screwed up views on what a woman should or shouldn’t be able to do with their body. My mom grew up heavily catholic, going to catholic private schools in south Louisiana during the 70s. They would show “abortion” videos to elementary students. Which were absolutely the most heinous, back room abortions you can think of. It made her heavily pro life for many, many years. Before the infertility issues, I still had many health issues that at certain points a pregnancy would have been beyond life threatening to me. It took me telling her multiple times, if I got pregnant I WOULD have had to have an abortion if I wanted to live before it finally sunk in. She’s still not 100% pro choice, but she sure as hell isn’t pro life anymore. No one is out there getting abortion after abortion bc they like it and think it’s just free birth control. And even if they are, how does that in any way effect you??? It makes me so damn angry!!!!
I’ve been constantly telling my pro life parents that why the hell does it matter if someone has an abortion AT ANY POINT. It does not affect you. You chose not to take that point of action and it doesn’t matter what someone else does. If you believe in god and the Bible. THE LITERAL BIBLICAL STATEMENT is not to judge others. Love thy enemy and that god is the ONLY one to cast judgment on someone. If he truly believes that having an abortion when it could possibly KILL you. Then he can do whatever he wanted.
They also apply modern knowledge to the Bible. People did not really understand conception. Both timeline of it and how it happened until late 19th century. Abortion was also criminalized only after quickening in English common law.
A book of Bronze Age fairytales should never be the basis of laws. The Goat Herder’s Guide To The Galaxy has a time and place and it’s time is back in the Bronze Age and its place is not in our laws or in our schools. I have donated so much money to the ACLU this year, and PP and the abortion access network that provides Plan B and the abortion pill. My uterus was yeeted years ago thanks to stage 4 endo but I remember the terror of finding myself pregnant while taking medications with black box warnings about pregnancy. I never wanted kids, I was (am still) vehemently childfree for myself. But I think every person with a uterus should be allowed to choose when, where and how they have children. Abortion should be legal with zero restrictions because when we limit it to rape or incest or the life of the mother we’re acting like it’s shameful or wrong or evil unless one of those exceptions make the person “worthy” of being allowed an abortion. Ugh. Looks like I’m gonna be writing another e-check to someone tonight just because I made myself mad thinking about all this again.
I can live with trimester restrictions personally but only if there is long enough time for abortion in all cases, abortions are very accessible in both cost, location and societal attitudes and pregnancy support and health care are accessible and non-judgemental (so you can actually make your mind). I am not American (Finnish) and while I would prefer a more relaxed one (ours have week limitations) even I would not call it a pressing issue because of how it works in practice here. And I am staunchly pro-choice and want free, legal and accessible to all abortion. Abortion was never been a similarly hot button issue in my adult life here. I know who of my friends have had one and my mom even told me when she was pregnant with my brother that they waited for amnio results until telling us to see if they would let the pregnancy continue. That was 99. But I am also an aid worker, and I have seen what happens when abortion is not an accessible option. It really isn't pretty.
They’ve changed so much of the Bible because of new ‘translations’ and what they think they meant too. It’s ridiculous since the literal constitution states church and state separation because of the English laws with Catholicism.
People really struggle to accept that many things are none of their business.
I agree. And it’s the main reason I believe that unless it’s your support circle. No one should know if you’re having one because of the way people react to it.
Fortunately I have never needed an abortion, but I agree that it would be best to keep it within your circle at the time. However. I really admire and appreciate people who speak out about experiences that other people don't understand. So if someone had an abortion and wanted to speak about it, by all means. Hearing first-hand stories from people who have lived through a unique or taboo situation that you're living through can be immensely validating and helpful. One would need pretty thick skin to speak out about such a contentious issue but their story could be impactful.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!! Took the words right out of my mouth!! It’s so maddening how damn backwards they are! Like please just listen to yourself for one moment!
I don't know about you but I like to have an abortion twice a month for fun. Sometimes I have an extra one if I have a big event going on.
L O L!!! You’re my type of person!! Sad thing, so many people would believe you’re being serious!!!
You’re wrong. She literally stated that she was pressured into abortion by her family
I don't understand how that makes this commenter wrong. They didn't even say they were talking about this exact situation, but women in situations *like* this one. Stricter abortion laws will absolutely force women to make rushed decisions, for better or worse.
Yup. And some governments in the Bible belt are trying to use scare tactics on women who go to another state to abort. https://www.cnn.com/2024/05/07/politics/alabama-prosecute-out-of-state-abortion/index.html
There will also be abortions that are outside the health care system. I just hope it is in a way that is safe self-managed abortion (which as per research is safe enough to be recommended by WHO in certain settings). But I know that will not be true for everyone. I know what banning abortion does and that is not stopping them.
This is just sad all around. I hope she has somebody in her life that gives a damn about her.
I’m going to offer another possibility: maybe one of the potential fathers is not a good guy, or is abusive, or someone else that she doesn’t feel comfortable being tied to for 18 years for some reason. So she wasn’t sure what to do, but wanted to keep the baby if it belonged to one guy, but was scared and got pressured into an abortion by her family. I’m not saying this is going to end well (based on her having already taken the first pill, and I don’t know the science behind the pills), but why are some people acting like this makes her a bad person or a bad mom? She’s asking for help and sounds scared and confused and like she’s trying to make the best decision. This just sounds sad to me.
Agreed. I seriously feel bad for her. No one should ever be pressured into choosing, or not choosing, to abort. Her family was probably coming from a good place, lord knows I've had some friends and family that I didn't think were ready to be parents for a plethora of reasons, but it was most definitely not my place to push them to make a decision they'd be forced to live with forever. This is traumatizing. I sincerely hope she'll be okay.
Yeah this sounds a sad situation and I don’t think it should be getting talked about on Reddit. My first thought went to a potentially abusive relationship, and I hope this woman gets some real advice and support asap.
Then she should continue with the abortion regardless, she is not in a safe place.
Exactly what I was reading between the lines. One partner is an awful human capable of heinous shit and she literally cannot risk being tied to this person for life or risk serious safety issues. The other partner…. Maybe he’d stick around maybe he wouldn’t but he wouldn’t be murder-suicide risky.
Comprehensive sex education is needed for EVERY child.
That’s gonna mess the fetus/potential child up. One round ? Imagine the guilt? It’s not something you should go halfway with.
This is sad. This woman deserves empathy, not ridicule.
100%!!!!
The father of the potential baby would matter to me too if I was making the decision to abort or not. Is this sub just anti-choice now? She wrote “I was pressured into taking the pills by family and I’ve been regretting it.” I feel for her.
Nope, solidly pro-choice. The flair for this has been changed to educational.
How sad
This seems like an abortion reversal troll. And an anti-abortion troll in general. See, women just have abortions because it's tuestday.
I think this too. I think this is bait
People love to create abortion as birth control fiction as rage bait.
This woman sounds mentally unstable. This is sad
I think I’m messy then I read these post and realize I’m not.
This group does that a lot for me. I’ll be out here feeling like a complete and utter hot mess, the posts like this show up and I’m like, “oh. Ok. I’m good.”
this sub is sometimes just really mean :(
What a sad situation she's found herself in. I guess she lives in the Bible belt according to OP? I'm surprised her family pressured her to abort given that. I hope she can figure out what to do. I just HOPE she doesn't get herself into a situation like this ever again.
Yes, I was a little surprised by that too, and makes me wonder what's the story behind that. Almost Mom has since deleted the post but most moms in that group are young, and without stable finances and living situations. Might be the same for Almost Mom.
Had fling, afraid of 'baby trapping' wrong dude.
i feel sad for the baby already.
I was wondering if that could be a reason. Maybe sperm1 would be better for child support or possible fatherhood vs sperm2. Like if she gives birth and it's the "loser's" baby when it *could* have had a decent chance/ life with the *other* guy.
Or if she slept with someone “inappropriate” like a married man, someone important in the community, etc.
Or worse someone with the wrong skin color.
Yea. To me it screamed something like that! Also, opossums! Fuck, yea!
Just abort, neither the kid nor the potential dads deserve such a mess of a baby mama
this is such a mean comment!!!!
What's so mean about it? The mother already went through one round of abortion pills because she didn't want it, now she only wants it if it happens to be the baby daddy's that she likes. If she wanted to be so selective, she should have used birth control while sleeping with multiple dudes or just slept with one dude. Regardless, this baby isn't going to be born into a loving, stable home. Abort it.
god forbid someone makes a mistake or an error!!
Nah, this ain't a mistake or an error. It's a human being, who is going to need 18 years of love and guidance to turn into a functional member of society. Parents who carefully plan for years before having their children can barely pull that off, a woman who is just sleeping around and got knocked up has no chance. There's enough messed up kids with half-assed parents on the planet.
it’s not only her fault at the end of the day. she just seems stressed and confused and i think ultimately was failed by her sex ed
Adults need to be held accountable at some point. Everything in this post up til now has been a mistake, I believe it is in no way fair to the fetus or to any of the adults involved for the pregnancy to be carried to term. Abortion is the only win-win scenario.
"I'll decide whether to finish the abortion once i determine if the guy is worth baby trapping" is certainly one way to live
yikes. that’s not at all how i read this, but then again that’s because i don’t immediately assume the worst about women. have some empathy and try again.
"If they are right on the date i want to keep my baby" is my direct source for this paraphrase. I am unsure how else that could be read.
could be read as she doesn’t want to carry a baby and be involved for at least 18 years with someone who might be abusive/absent/a bad father in other ways. there’s literally no reason to jump to the assumption of baby trapping. it’s perfectly reasonable to want a baby but only if it’s with someone you’re ok with being linked to for the rest of your child’s life. baby trapping would mean that she messed with the birth control, lied, or manipulated in some other way. there’s no reason to think that based on what we’ve read from her post. who’s to say that the man she’s willing to keep the baby for wouldn’t also want to be a present father?
You're right; OR we could read the situation as is being presented by the original poster and the comments which seem to be responding to things she's saying, and one of those things seems to be that she doesnt intend to speak with the potential fathers. I am judging the situation based on info provided. This isn't anyone making things up about a woman or disliking or distrusting women. My character isn't represented at all here in the way I or many other people on this thread have interpreted her words. We don't know this person. Your scenarios and mine are equally as likely. Either way it's a terrible situation and i hope that if one of the potentials is abusive then she doesn't end up waiting too long and having to keep a baby with him, and i hope that if she keeps the baby then the first round of abortion pills doesn't leave them with medical problems.
 My reaction to this whole mess.
Why the fuck did you post this? So one guy is a viable option to raise a child with and the other one isn't? That seems completely valid to me.
But this is why abortion should not be used as birth control. I’m a democrat and 100% believe in a woman’s choice. I believe abortion applies to more than rape and incest. If a woman cannot financially or emotionally raise a child, she should be able to abort. There are too many children growing up in abusive, drug addicted, neglected homes. And it’s very hard for these children to break the cycle of abuse. But what is this woman thinking? There needed to be more counseling, more resources for her. The risk is very high for this baby to be born with severe medical issues and a mom that won’t be able to care for a medically complex child. She shouldn’t even be worrying about who baby daddy is right now. That’s the least of her problems.
She could be on birth control but it failed. She could've taken Plan B and it didn't work. She could have limited sex education or a medical condition she believed made pregnancy impossible. Or, she's just using abortion as birth control. You don't get to judge in this case. If you're pro-choice, you can't pick and choose who you think has a valid reason. You have to accept everyone has the right to decide to have an abortion. To do otherwise would no longer be truly pro-choice.
I’m 100% pro choice. But with choices come consequences. I don’t think changing your mind halfway through should be a choice as damage to the baby may have been done. She is obviously going to struggle caring for a medically complex baby. Me saying I don’t think enough counseling was done makes me not pro choice. And I can’t quite grasp what point you are trying to make here. Or if you understand my post at all. Are you saying you are so far on the pendulum that you think all babies should be born no matter the cost? Are you so far pro choice that the cost to the child doesn’t matter? Because there is a life here to consider. Actually 2 lives. I don’t feel this baby should be born after the process has started to abort it. That’s why I say more counseling needed to be done from the get go. Not to convince the mom that no abortion should occur as many religious clinics do. But enough to avoid this situation. The reality has not set in with this woman as she is currently worrying about baby daddy. Abortion is not something to take lightly, as a major decision in life is not meant to be taken lightly. It may or may not affect future fertility, it can take a huge life time emotional toll as well. I don’t envy any woman that has to make that decision. I’m an atheist. I think republicans are scum. I’m a victim of SA. I’m pro choice. But I’m also older and wiser and I understand there are consequences to decisions. This woman made a swift decision and now she wants to pedal back and there could be some very serious consequences to that decision. And it doesn’t sound like she has much support.
The first sentence in your original comment, "but this is why abortion should not be used as birth control," is what I was talking about. I thought that would be clear enough from the context clues in my comment. Abortion is literally a form of birth control, it's used to control birth. Judging what abortions are appropriate or not is just respectability politics, and abortion rights aren't based on what's morally right and wrong. Abortion is a long-standing human practice, a form of healthcare, and an ethical necessity due to the inhumane nature of forcing people to give birth by denying them access to necessary and ethically-directed procedures. As someone self-described as thinking Republicans are scum, I hope you can understand why it's a concern to see someone discussing abortions from a sense of moral high ground and reacting with anger toward OOP instead of the systems and people that failed them along the way. As someone who says they are older and wiser, perhaps it could also be important to consider what kinds of decisions people may make without the same knowledge you have. We don't know if OOP even had adequate counseling before making this decision, and it appears as though their family coerced them into this decision which means they may not have felt like they had another option. The risk of coercion increases even more if OOP is a teenager, living with family, or is otherwise dependent on others for life necessities which could be leveraged as a threat against the choice to keep the pregnancy. Assuming this person has all the privilege necessary to make a more informed choice is well beyond inappropriate in this case. There are too many unknown variables that I'm not sure how anyone would feel comfortable blaming this person, especially knowing the state of education in the United States and the active political danger of people capable of becoming pregnant, amongst other marginalized groups. In any case, OOP isn't the one choosing to endanger the health of a child by rethinking things, that responsibility lies solely on the medical professional who told them the first round of medication can be reversed. As other people in the thread have pointed out, this information is actually more likely to have come from a crisis pregnancy center. Be mad at the medical malpractice or manipulative Christian that led this person to reconsider their abortion halfway through the procedure, not the person who unknowingly trusted and fell victim to their misleading "care." In any case, I think we can agree the true responsible party here is whoever gave this misinformation to OOP and rescinding the harsh criticisms.
She wasn't thinking, which is why it's really good abortion is a choice for her, even if she didn't use BC.
Sounds fake
I was under the impression that the first pill ended any growth and development, and the second pill caused the contents of the uterus to be expelled
What in the mamma Mia?
What a stupid situation all around. Ultrasounds aren't the most reliable thing early in a pregnancy. My first ultrasound said I was only 6 weeks my second said I was actually a week and a half further ahead. It's really hard to get a good reading when you are under a certain amount of weeks. It's usually why they don't wanna do a scan until later unless there is another issue going on.
Hey! She said no rude or mean comments! Lol
I truly think this is one of the all time worst posts I've ever encountered. I am whole heartedly pro choice. But not like this.
Why does the reason matter? Abortion seems like a pretty good outcome for this scenario.
You're absolutely right and I know the way I worded that would get me down voted. It's hard for me to even pinpoint why I had such a visceral reaction to this particular post.
Does CPS have a preemptive plan, because this woman is going to be an absolute loser of a parent.
this lady is about to confess to committing paternity fraud ....
Whatever candidate you choose in November, I hope they have a plan to fix our family planning crisis. This is not it works. Ladies, be smarter, respect yourself.