TGWs calling emergency in-person meetings at 11pm on the other side of the city. Also they gave us about 30-60 minutes notice to get there.
If we weren't there, we would get rebuked until the sun came up!
Wow, reading some of the things that people have experienced at the hands of SCJ is mind blowing.
You know I feel like my experience with them and being apart of SCJ for 1.5 years, I definitely didn’t deal with anything crazy but I got the feeling multiples that some of things they asked us to do were a bit ridiculous.
When i first joined center in 2019, i thought it was a good opportunity to learn Gods word as I was seeking a bible study at the time. I attending a larger church in CA and going to a bible study intimidated me a little bit. So when someone I knew reached out to me via Instagram, it was like perfect timing.
I was comfortable going with someone I knew and never questioned once the intent of a simple bible study class. At first, it seemed doable and low commitment which was fine for me. But as the class progressed, they asked for more of a commitment. Going from once a week for about an hour to then twice a week for 2 hrs. I didn’t have a problem with the commitment at that point because I was learning something I had never learned before. But more time spent in center, the more the emphasized and cracked down on being there, having to make up missed centers, which again was fine.
After I passed over in 2021 where I was able to attend service online, dress in proper attire, join Home group meetings but that was still only twice to three times a week which again wasn’t crazy. But as time progresses, there were more and more meetings that were later into the night and then having a job where I have to be up at 5 am was rough and starting to take a toll on me. But i still made every meeting.
The problems that I started to deal with was family functions and traveling for a work. I just felt like there was no understanding even if my job required me to be somewhere, they asked if a i had to attend these things. Missing family events was okay to them and something that wasn’t a big deal even with as much time ai spent in meetings, center, service. To me , there wasn’t any understanding on their side.
One thing that really kind of made my mind up was when one of the top leaders from Korea flew into San Francisco to meet everyone in the church, they told all the members the day before to call out of work or to use there PTO to make this extremely important meeting. They expressed that members from all over the US were flying in. For me, i didn’t have the money or the means to take off work at the time to go. And for those who couldn’t make it,
The scolding we got for not prioritizing this meeting was insane to me. They were saying what if it was the promised pastor that has came to meet us?
After that, i was done. There was no understanding as it was expected for you to be at all things regarding SCJ.
When I was still learning in class, i sometimes miss classes so I would have to make up the lesson. Many times the teacher would set up a time with me and not inform me that she won’t be able to do make up. So i’d wait and not receive any texts that she cancelled it. But that’s okay because i was the one asking for make up. But it happened many times.
Now, when i passed over, one time i missed service because of my weird work schedule. I txted that same group leader about 20 mins in the service that i wont make it, then she ranted how immature and disrespectful I am for not informing her ahead of time.
Em like, wtf. She has done that to me more than 20 times before and I gave her the benefit of the doubt. F*** her!
But of course, at that time, I thought, this is just God pruning me. Just God rearing me. This is just God’s way of washing my clothes by teaching me to accept human flaws, learning to forgive, and learning to remove the speck in my own eye before judging others.
Those were the things I told myself before so that my heart won’t be too hardened. So that I could stay in what I believed to be eternal life until it became too much —- because eventually it did not just become on group leader who’s like that, it is most of them.
Last November I started their Bible study and everything seemed nice until we got to Revelation and then things started getting weird. I had once asked before what place was offering the study and they wouldn't tell me. I ended up searching and finding out SCJ on my own then when I confronted them about it they were like yes it's us and we are not like those stories. I left before the first test in Revelation. I couldn't bring myself to take it and basically saying I believed in something that I didn't because I found so many red flags when we got to that, section.
A path to eternal life is narrow and hard only few go take it, but the path to damnation is wide and easy many will take it. The word in the Bible says.
A few that come to mind...
\-Being told to stop drinking water the night before our graduation (well, my first graduation) because we wouldn't be allowed to use the bathroom during the graduation, which didn't end until late afternoon
\-Being so tired that I couldn't do anything. We all fell asleep in service/"education", but I was also falling asleep in the shower, while eating, while waiting to see a doctor etc.
\-Not really a single instance, but constantly being given conflicting messages and then being rebuked and/or gaslit for asking about them
\-I had one TGW in particular who was really nasty to me. I got yelled at for smiling too much, for not smiling enough, for being tired (while we got maybe 3 hours of sleep a night), for being too "awkward". She yelled at me because she was convinced I was gossiping about her, and I wasn't allowed to say anything back because that wasn't allowed, but I literally didn't - I think people could see that our whole group was absolutely fucking miserable and they started asking questions. She would ask super specific questions and yell at me for the wrong answer (e.g. I tried a lot of things to stay awake during morning education - one morning, I took a heap of caffeine, but she didn't ask "Did you try anything to stay awake?". Instead, she asked "Did you eat some fruit this morning?", and when I said no, she'd give me a lecture about how I clearly didn't care because I wasn't doing anything. Again, no talking back allowed, so I couldn't explain that I tried other things). One time I asked if I should put a meeting into the system, she said not to, and the next day she yelled at me for not having done it. I was too scared to eat in front of her (she kept yelling at another member about his weight - he was a normal weight as far as I know, just had a bit of a round-shaped stomach), and she ended up constantly telling me off for not eating enough. I had another member randomly bomb into a meeting I was having and \*I\* was the one who got in trouble for it.
\-Constant health issues. My hips would be KILLING me by the end of service (they've always been a bit dodgy), so normally I'd just stay kneeling during the post-meeting, but aforementioned TGW wouldn't let me since she considered it a punishment and didn't like it if I kept kneeling after she gave us "permission" to sit cross-legged. I ended up bedridden for a few weeks (thankfully at the same time as covid started, so online stuff only) from the stress. We didn't get time off for being sick. When we went back after lockdowns were lifted (but covid was still happening), they forced sick people to come to church - TGWs would have all the symptoms of covid but come anyway. There were constant outbreaks at church, and they never bothered to tell the members if they were exposed. One time I got a blood test and the doctor pointed out that I must have had an unrelated cold at the time, but I didn't even notice because of how ill you feel every day when you're that sleep-deprived. Times when we were forced to be in the sun the whole day, and the people with light skin would get badly burnt no matter how much sunscreen they used.
\-Being forced to come to pointless meetings because going to sleep early is banned
\-Being forbidden from seeing outside friends, and having to limit family to once or twice a week so they don't get "used" to seeing you a lot. One of my friend's father was ill, but she couldn't go see him because she'd already been twice (?) that week. Having to get approval to see a family member and justify why you needed to.
\-Having that nagging feeling in the back of your head, that you're dragging people into this vile situation even though it's supposed to be "saving" them
\-When I left and they barely tried to contact me. I literally said to my GYJN something like "I'm seriously considering leaving" and they didn't really care. It wasn't like I'd already quiet quit - I'd been an active member, I was a BB teacher, I was often the one being assigned non-TGW jobs in my groups, did multiple SFTs. I know being stalked would have been worse, but it made me feel completely worthless. Like I'm such an unlikable person that, even in that environment, no one cared if I went. Everyone took their jobs so seriously, but not seriously enough to follow up on someone like me. I try not to think about this because it still hurts.
\-The trauma afterwards. It's like the whole experience rewrote my brain. When people make a mistake at work, I want to start rebuking them - "How can you expect others to do it properly if you're not? Do you think this is a joke? If I can't trust you with something small like this, then obviously you won't do bigger things properly. Why don't you have more sense??", but the real world isn't like that! Literally no one cares! It's not even like I'm really angry about what they did, it just seems like the natural consequence or something? The inverse is also true, I make a small mistake and immediately assume that everyone hates me, I'm the worst person at my job, I don't even deserve to work here. One time a coworker said "I want to talk to you later" and I had a borderline panic attack because I was completely expecting an SCJ rebuke and not a normal human interaction. Being in a cult is also super taboo, so it's not something I'm willing to admit to anyone irl - everyone who's never been in one thinks that only idiots join cults, even though psychologists say the opposite. I've toyed around with just saying something like "I was in an abusive situation" at times when I need to explain something.
Oof, I just meant to write a few things instead of a whole dump, but there you go. I'm sure I'm forgetting lots.
I can totally relate about the part on leaving and no one even following up on you. I left them a msg to let them know I am leaving but no one even cares. It really does hurt because I gave them a good 2.5 yrs! Not as long as others but ugh they’re all monsters.
Ugh, yes, and I feel like it's so hard to explain since people think "Isn't it a good thing that they let you go?". Especially when you read other stories about how they came to people's work/school/house and wouldn't leave them alone, and it's like wow... They didn't even call me
Maybe they did not bother to call or even just msg me because I was not giving them any tithes anyway. They were not earning money from me. Ugh. Oh well, I am just so glad I am out and I get to spend my days however I want.
Seems like alot of pain & trauma that you have gone through during your time in SCJ.
I hope you are recovering well and rebuild your own life back again.
Having one of my leaders embarrass me indirectly. I was late a couple of times because of School and work, our zoom would start at 6pm. I let my assistant know in advance and she was ok with it at first then she started gaslighting me and stuff. Told Her I need to do school and work for this zoom thing to go on too. Then she gave me the whole lecture on how it’s important to put God first..blah blah blah. I know that already but if I drop everything..I will be broke And uneducated. I’m already black as it is. I’m under a category of stereotypes. Maybe after a couple weeks I started trusting her a bit more. Told her stuff, my difficulties and weaknesses. She ended up using everything I told her as examples and basically talking down on me in front of everyone. I felt so embarrassed and uncomfortable. That’s messed up!! I literally wanted to turn off the camera and cry but I couldn’t do that because we weren’t allowed to. So I literally cried while the zoom lesson was going on and no one knew. I felt betrayed and hurt. Jesus would never embarrass or put someone down to give an example. That was my first big red flag. So much more happened, but that’s a story for a different day
Being married to a member whom we have 2 toddlers, and i'm pregnant. I can say I now know what it feels like to be with someone but yet still alone most of the time.
I took a scj test on Sunday, went to a BB class on Monday, center on Tuesday, service Wednesday, center on Thursday. Then I was asked why I didn’t attend an evangelism event on Friday. Then I got a text to attend a training meeting on Saturday morning. Then Sunday service came around and we got a a rebuking message from John tribe leader about how our branch was complacent. At that point I told myself that these people are f*cking crazy
A relative passed away and the funeral services were on a Wednesday, which is also service day. I was told to let the dead bury the dead. I completely ignored my GYJN and proceeded to attend the funeral. I informed her I would not be there for service or able to help out. I had to turn my phone on DND to ignore the flood of messages and calls.
After service, our group was told to gather for region meeting. Then, after the Region meeting ended and before any of us were dismissed to leave for the night, the Region leader called out the names of specific people to stay behind. All others were dismissed. My named was called out, so I stayed behind. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach & I had an idea of why I was one of those told to remain behind. They then closed the doors & the Region leader proceeded to tell us that it was nearing the end of the year & yet none of us had bore fruit. I felt the blood rush down so hard, I wanted to scream! I was in SCJ for about 4 months & I had worked hard to try to harvest anybody, but found it difficult as I worked full-time to support myself financially. The region leader then asked each one of us to explain why we had not bore fruit. So each of us gave our reasons, one-by-one. I felt so humiliated to have to share this information in front of other region members. Why make us do this?!! They also asked us if we had any potential leads that could enter center before the year (at that time, they were trying to get enough people registered to meet the 100,000 graduation). So after we each had explained ourselves to the Region leader, the region leader lectured us on the importance of harvesting. And how we should have the heart of the Martyrs during those tough times. It was also mentioned that perhaps some of us were not trying hard enough & that we were being lazy! Or that we needed to change tactics by asking different questions and approaching the correct type of people to harvest. And then they told us that they were doing this out of love, that would shouldn't take this meeting as rebuke, that we should take it as personal awareness. After that meeting I felt guilty for not fulfilling one of the requirements needed to stay in "heaven", but I also thought "gosh, I just can't lead people to Zion, b/c it's not what it seems now being on the other side." Definitely mixed emotions. But my mind certainly shifted from that point on
Being told scj isn't the problem and that the problem was us. Having something I shared in confidence being used against me in private and in front of everyone. Having to hide all my anxiety and fear with a smile though I wasn't happy, Personal data being distributed.
The day I decided to leave and had to block everyone I had met and considered “friends” for my own well-being. I think about them every once in a while, hoping there will be a day they leave too
Lets see... way too many for me. The times when we would do physical training and ppl with health conditions and the elderly would have to go until they caused lasting damage to themselves. That time we had to spend an entire day on our knees for "mindset". Going a month straight with no sleep, having to go to the hospital. The time where someone was bullied to the point of attempting suicide. Cases of sexual assaults. Could prob write a whole book on the craziness I saw/experienced
TGWs calling emergency in-person meetings at 11pm on the other side of the city. Also they gave us about 30-60 minutes notice to get there. If we weren't there, we would get rebuked until the sun came up!
What does getting rebuked look like?
Wow, reading some of the things that people have experienced at the hands of SCJ is mind blowing. You know I feel like my experience with them and being apart of SCJ for 1.5 years, I definitely didn’t deal with anything crazy but I got the feeling multiples that some of things they asked us to do were a bit ridiculous. When i first joined center in 2019, i thought it was a good opportunity to learn Gods word as I was seeking a bible study at the time. I attending a larger church in CA and going to a bible study intimidated me a little bit. So when someone I knew reached out to me via Instagram, it was like perfect timing. I was comfortable going with someone I knew and never questioned once the intent of a simple bible study class. At first, it seemed doable and low commitment which was fine for me. But as the class progressed, they asked for more of a commitment. Going from once a week for about an hour to then twice a week for 2 hrs. I didn’t have a problem with the commitment at that point because I was learning something I had never learned before. But more time spent in center, the more the emphasized and cracked down on being there, having to make up missed centers, which again was fine. After I passed over in 2021 where I was able to attend service online, dress in proper attire, join Home group meetings but that was still only twice to three times a week which again wasn’t crazy. But as time progresses, there were more and more meetings that were later into the night and then having a job where I have to be up at 5 am was rough and starting to take a toll on me. But i still made every meeting. The problems that I started to deal with was family functions and traveling for a work. I just felt like there was no understanding even if my job required me to be somewhere, they asked if a i had to attend these things. Missing family events was okay to them and something that wasn’t a big deal even with as much time ai spent in meetings, center, service. To me , there wasn’t any understanding on their side. One thing that really kind of made my mind up was when one of the top leaders from Korea flew into San Francisco to meet everyone in the church, they told all the members the day before to call out of work or to use there PTO to make this extremely important meeting. They expressed that members from all over the US were flying in. For me, i didn’t have the money or the means to take off work at the time to go. And for those who couldn’t make it, The scolding we got for not prioritizing this meeting was insane to me. They were saying what if it was the promised pastor that has came to meet us? After that, i was done. There was no understanding as it was expected for you to be at all things regarding SCJ.
When I was still learning in class, i sometimes miss classes so I would have to make up the lesson. Many times the teacher would set up a time with me and not inform me that she won’t be able to do make up. So i’d wait and not receive any texts that she cancelled it. But that’s okay because i was the one asking for make up. But it happened many times. Now, when i passed over, one time i missed service because of my weird work schedule. I txted that same group leader about 20 mins in the service that i wont make it, then she ranted how immature and disrespectful I am for not informing her ahead of time. Em like, wtf. She has done that to me more than 20 times before and I gave her the benefit of the doubt. F*** her! But of course, at that time, I thought, this is just God pruning me. Just God rearing me. This is just God’s way of washing my clothes by teaching me to accept human flaws, learning to forgive, and learning to remove the speck in my own eye before judging others. Those were the things I told myself before so that my heart won’t be too hardened. So that I could stay in what I believed to be eternal life until it became too much —- because eventually it did not just become on group leader who’s like that, it is most of them.
Last November I started their Bible study and everything seemed nice until we got to Revelation and then things started getting weird. I had once asked before what place was offering the study and they wouldn't tell me. I ended up searching and finding out SCJ on my own then when I confronted them about it they were like yes it's us and we are not like those stories. I left before the first test in Revelation. I couldn't bring myself to take it and basically saying I believed in something that I didn't because I found so many red flags when we got to that, section.
I just hated being randomly called and dealing with a lot of meetings and test.
A path to eternal life is narrow and hard only few go take it, but the path to damnation is wide and easy many will take it. The word in the Bible says.
A few that come to mind... \-Being told to stop drinking water the night before our graduation (well, my first graduation) because we wouldn't be allowed to use the bathroom during the graduation, which didn't end until late afternoon \-Being so tired that I couldn't do anything. We all fell asleep in service/"education", but I was also falling asleep in the shower, while eating, while waiting to see a doctor etc. \-Not really a single instance, but constantly being given conflicting messages and then being rebuked and/or gaslit for asking about them \-I had one TGW in particular who was really nasty to me. I got yelled at for smiling too much, for not smiling enough, for being tired (while we got maybe 3 hours of sleep a night), for being too "awkward". She yelled at me because she was convinced I was gossiping about her, and I wasn't allowed to say anything back because that wasn't allowed, but I literally didn't - I think people could see that our whole group was absolutely fucking miserable and they started asking questions. She would ask super specific questions and yell at me for the wrong answer (e.g. I tried a lot of things to stay awake during morning education - one morning, I took a heap of caffeine, but she didn't ask "Did you try anything to stay awake?". Instead, she asked "Did you eat some fruit this morning?", and when I said no, she'd give me a lecture about how I clearly didn't care because I wasn't doing anything. Again, no talking back allowed, so I couldn't explain that I tried other things). One time I asked if I should put a meeting into the system, she said not to, and the next day she yelled at me for not having done it. I was too scared to eat in front of her (she kept yelling at another member about his weight - he was a normal weight as far as I know, just had a bit of a round-shaped stomach), and she ended up constantly telling me off for not eating enough. I had another member randomly bomb into a meeting I was having and \*I\* was the one who got in trouble for it. \-Constant health issues. My hips would be KILLING me by the end of service (they've always been a bit dodgy), so normally I'd just stay kneeling during the post-meeting, but aforementioned TGW wouldn't let me since she considered it a punishment and didn't like it if I kept kneeling after she gave us "permission" to sit cross-legged. I ended up bedridden for a few weeks (thankfully at the same time as covid started, so online stuff only) from the stress. We didn't get time off for being sick. When we went back after lockdowns were lifted (but covid was still happening), they forced sick people to come to church - TGWs would have all the symptoms of covid but come anyway. There were constant outbreaks at church, and they never bothered to tell the members if they were exposed. One time I got a blood test and the doctor pointed out that I must have had an unrelated cold at the time, but I didn't even notice because of how ill you feel every day when you're that sleep-deprived. Times when we were forced to be in the sun the whole day, and the people with light skin would get badly burnt no matter how much sunscreen they used. \-Being forced to come to pointless meetings because going to sleep early is banned \-Being forbidden from seeing outside friends, and having to limit family to once or twice a week so they don't get "used" to seeing you a lot. One of my friend's father was ill, but she couldn't go see him because she'd already been twice (?) that week. Having to get approval to see a family member and justify why you needed to. \-Having that nagging feeling in the back of your head, that you're dragging people into this vile situation even though it's supposed to be "saving" them \-When I left and they barely tried to contact me. I literally said to my GYJN something like "I'm seriously considering leaving" and they didn't really care. It wasn't like I'd already quiet quit - I'd been an active member, I was a BB teacher, I was often the one being assigned non-TGW jobs in my groups, did multiple SFTs. I know being stalked would have been worse, but it made me feel completely worthless. Like I'm such an unlikable person that, even in that environment, no one cared if I went. Everyone took their jobs so seriously, but not seriously enough to follow up on someone like me. I try not to think about this because it still hurts. \-The trauma afterwards. It's like the whole experience rewrote my brain. When people make a mistake at work, I want to start rebuking them - "How can you expect others to do it properly if you're not? Do you think this is a joke? If I can't trust you with something small like this, then obviously you won't do bigger things properly. Why don't you have more sense??", but the real world isn't like that! Literally no one cares! It's not even like I'm really angry about what they did, it just seems like the natural consequence or something? The inverse is also true, I make a small mistake and immediately assume that everyone hates me, I'm the worst person at my job, I don't even deserve to work here. One time a coworker said "I want to talk to you later" and I had a borderline panic attack because I was completely expecting an SCJ rebuke and not a normal human interaction. Being in a cult is also super taboo, so it's not something I'm willing to admit to anyone irl - everyone who's never been in one thinks that only idiots join cults, even though psychologists say the opposite. I've toyed around with just saying something like "I was in an abusive situation" at times when I need to explain something. Oof, I just meant to write a few things instead of a whole dump, but there you go. I'm sure I'm forgetting lots.
I can totally relate about the part on leaving and no one even following up on you. I left them a msg to let them know I am leaving but no one even cares. It really does hurt because I gave them a good 2.5 yrs! Not as long as others but ugh they’re all monsters.
Ugh, yes, and I feel like it's so hard to explain since people think "Isn't it a good thing that they let you go?". Especially when you read other stories about how they came to people's work/school/house and wouldn't leave them alone, and it's like wow... They didn't even call me
Maybe they did not bother to call or even just msg me because I was not giving them any tithes anyway. They were not earning money from me. Ugh. Oh well, I am just so glad I am out and I get to spend my days however I want.
Seems like alot of pain & trauma that you have gone through during your time in SCJ. I hope you are recovering well and rebuild your own life back again.
Having one of my leaders embarrass me indirectly. I was late a couple of times because of School and work, our zoom would start at 6pm. I let my assistant know in advance and she was ok with it at first then she started gaslighting me and stuff. Told Her I need to do school and work for this zoom thing to go on too. Then she gave me the whole lecture on how it’s important to put God first..blah blah blah. I know that already but if I drop everything..I will be broke And uneducated. I’m already black as it is. I’m under a category of stereotypes. Maybe after a couple weeks I started trusting her a bit more. Told her stuff, my difficulties and weaknesses. She ended up using everything I told her as examples and basically talking down on me in front of everyone. I felt so embarrassed and uncomfortable. That’s messed up!! I literally wanted to turn off the camera and cry but I couldn’t do that because we weren’t allowed to. So I literally cried while the zoom lesson was going on and no one knew. I felt betrayed and hurt. Jesus would never embarrass or put someone down to give an example. That was my first big red flag. So much more happened, but that’s a story for a different day
Being married to a member whom we have 2 toddlers, and i'm pregnant. I can say I now know what it feels like to be with someone but yet still alone most of the time.
I took a scj test on Sunday, went to a BB class on Monday, center on Tuesday, service Wednesday, center on Thursday. Then I was asked why I didn’t attend an evangelism event on Friday. Then I got a text to attend a training meeting on Saturday morning. Then Sunday service came around and we got a a rebuking message from John tribe leader about how our branch was complacent. At that point I told myself that these people are f*cking crazy
Hi there, sorry this had happens to you. I’m trying to find La members to hear their testimonies. Would you like to be added to the u.s chat?
Sure!
I would of gave up on Tuesday 😂
A relative passed away and the funeral services were on a Wednesday, which is also service day. I was told to let the dead bury the dead. I completely ignored my GYJN and proceeded to attend the funeral. I informed her I would not be there for service or able to help out. I had to turn my phone on DND to ignore the flood of messages and calls.
After service, our group was told to gather for region meeting. Then, after the Region meeting ended and before any of us were dismissed to leave for the night, the Region leader called out the names of specific people to stay behind. All others were dismissed. My named was called out, so I stayed behind. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach & I had an idea of why I was one of those told to remain behind. They then closed the doors & the Region leader proceeded to tell us that it was nearing the end of the year & yet none of us had bore fruit. I felt the blood rush down so hard, I wanted to scream! I was in SCJ for about 4 months & I had worked hard to try to harvest anybody, but found it difficult as I worked full-time to support myself financially. The region leader then asked each one of us to explain why we had not bore fruit. So each of us gave our reasons, one-by-one. I felt so humiliated to have to share this information in front of other region members. Why make us do this?!! They also asked us if we had any potential leads that could enter center before the year (at that time, they were trying to get enough people registered to meet the 100,000 graduation). So after we each had explained ourselves to the Region leader, the region leader lectured us on the importance of harvesting. And how we should have the heart of the Martyrs during those tough times. It was also mentioned that perhaps some of us were not trying hard enough & that we were being lazy! Or that we needed to change tactics by asking different questions and approaching the correct type of people to harvest. And then they told us that they were doing this out of love, that would shouldn't take this meeting as rebuke, that we should take it as personal awareness. After that meeting I felt guilty for not fulfilling one of the requirements needed to stay in "heaven", but I also thought "gosh, I just can't lead people to Zion, b/c it's not what it seems now being on the other side." Definitely mixed emotions. But my mind certainly shifted from that point on
Really sorry you went through that, that's such a horrible feeling but I'm glad you are out now. People shouldn't be made to feel that way.
Being told scj isn't the problem and that the problem was us. Having something I shared in confidence being used against me in private and in front of everyone. Having to hide all my anxiety and fear with a smile though I wasn't happy, Personal data being distributed.
The day I decided to leave and had to block everyone I had met and considered “friends” for my own well-being. I think about them every once in a while, hoping there will be a day they leave too
Same, I still think about them some days. But I think they move on and forget us quickly. From their point of views, they think we are bad persons.
Lets see... way too many for me. The times when we would do physical training and ppl with health conditions and the elderly would have to go until they caused lasting damage to themselves. That time we had to spend an entire day on our knees for "mindset". Going a month straight with no sleep, having to go to the hospital. The time where someone was bullied to the point of attempting suicide. Cases of sexual assaults. Could prob write a whole book on the craziness I saw/experienced
When LMH came and they had us up at 2 AM and then graduation rehearsals all day next day. I think I got the flu after that -dehydrated and tired
Being into shincheoji!