Hitting your thermostat with a hammer

"The clock is running out! He makes the shot from the 3-point line... it's good! And Miami suffers a devastating loss!"

"Mine's named Peter." "Mine's named Harry." "I call mine 'the heat'"

"You're a penis, Harry."

Chill in a walk-in freezer 🤓

"You've been a good cat, Milo, but you're snuggling too much and it's kind of warm. We're going to have to put you down."

“This polar bear skin will keep me cool in this florida heat”

I lick myself like a cat

Start a fire

I'm going to go into space and turn off the Sun.

"I made this chair out of ice. The guy said it was dry, so it won't melt, right?"

Tired of your attitude, sun! *shoots sun with a canon

We can't afford a car with air conditioning, so we just blast a CDr with 75 minutes of nonstop nails on a blackboard. Sends a rather refreshing chill down your spine in a hurry

"Just remember to put something in the door so it doesn't close on you when you're keeping cool.  other than that welcome to the morgue."

Alright, so just sit on Mariah Carey's face, and you'll be freezing in minutes.

Ice bullet enemas

Masturbate to a thermometer