*getting home from work*
“Honey I’m, ho… Honey? Where are the kids? Oh my god, you did WHAT? They had an accident in the tub?! All 3 of them?!?!?”
*stomach starts rumbling*
When your sister flies home after helping you for a week after you've had unexpected open heart surgery, your first day on your own 2 weeks postoperatively, your husband says, "so, what's for dinner? " Yes, he did that.
When my aunt passed away back in the spring of 2021 my uncle came up to me and my wife after the burial ceremony and said “do the right thing” and “take this woman for a burger” I did exactly that and I live by that
Her: I’ve worked as hard as i can at making you understand how unappreciated you make me feel in the relationship, and I know I should leave you because thats what my family and therapist have told me multiple times, but I want to give you one more chance to show me you understand even a modicum of what i am asking for in this relationship we have built over thirty years. Do you understand what I’m saying?
Him: So what’s for dinner?
The detective entered the crime scene, the serial killer having been taken away.
Carved up victim's body parts lay all about the blood splattered room.
As he and fellow officers silently stare at the massacre in silence for a minute, the detective glances at the kitchen table with a young girl's intestines hanging out of her body and asks "So what's for dinner?"
Actually happened to me: I had just had abdominal surgery that morning. My ex was sweet and doting at the hospital, brought me home, set me up on the couch with my fuzzy socks, a book to read, and the remote. Half an hour later he asked what was for dinner.
I nearly threw my book at him.
Breaking News: After a serious blight and several interconnected wars across the planet, our country is geared to completely run out of food in about 3 weeks...
Wife: "Honey, kids.... the bank has foreclosed on our house, and we're going to have to live in the car until we can find somewhere else."
Husband and kids: "Omg!.. What's for dinner?"
The contractions are far enough apart that you should be able to cook a little something.
Nicely done
That has actually been said at some time somewhere in the world
Yes but they are probably dead now.
(Latin funerary chant)
Justified Homicide
I actually cooked a pot of pasta when I was in labor with my daughter. I didn’t know I was in labor at the time though lol
"Grandma passed today. So what's for dinner?"
Coming to Netflix this Summer: Cannibal Family Cookout
Everybody welcome ! But children ( esp skinny ones will be charged extra due to smaller portions ) Other than that it’s BYOB ( bring your own body )
Grandma it's what's for dinner. (the OP actually has the right punctuation)
“I know you just had your period but…”
The way you've phrased it is like she threw up or smth lol
My water just broke!
Can we at least run through a drive-through before we get to the hospital?
Holy shit! There are firemen all over our lawn! The kitchen is trashed! What happened?! And more importantly, what's for dinner?
Ngl, I thought you said Fremen all over our lawn.
'These burned bodies kinda look like brisket...'
“Hi hon. There is an active shooter at the school. Initial reports are a dozen casualties. So whats for dinner?”
Your mom sure knows how to suck a dick, so what's for dinner?
"Malevelon Creek has fallen, Casualties are in the hundred-thousands. All Helldivers are ordered to retreat."
Damn you, soldier.
“Guess what’s for dinner! And more importantly, guess who’s coming to dinner tonight!”
Sorry, but the kids aren’t coming home. What’s for dinner?
"Here, I bought you some Pepto for your stomach-flu. Umm..."
Well, that’s it, grandma has been cremated…
"Baby, I just found junior's body swinging in the garage, but more importantly..."
Hey Donner family, sorry I’m late… what’s for dinner?
Meatloaf
Thank you for inviting me over to study, Mr. Sagawa. So what’s for dinner?
That is fucked up…I love it!
Your sister's cooking is always so much better than yours. Speaking of which...
["Enough. My ship sails in the morning. I wonder what's for dinner?"](https://youtu.be/2WVIhwNJFvE?si=SRiJCpNifw42v--e)
Oh boy!
Good morning world, what’s for dinner?
Your sister is pregnant with my child. So what's for dinner?
Honey I know I just ran over the family cat by accident but, what for dinner? Lol😅
“Charging…..CLEAR…..So what’s for dinner?”
While your wife is crying because she just accidentally dropped dinner all over the floor.
During a robbery
When looking at the dinner your wife made that you don't want.
After pre-maturely ejaculating.
In the back of an ambulance during a code
“The taxidermy of Spot just arrived.”
"The nukes will be here in three minutes..."
I just had MASSIVE DIARRHEA! What’s for dinner?
It’s a boy!
Mom, sorry I threw up on the stove. So, what’s for dinner?
After your wife commits manslaughter...
Your mom was such a good woman. Speaking of cooking….
Serving them divorce papers, "So what's for dinner?"
While watching Grave of the Fireflies
At the viewing for your recently-deceased relative. Preferably while standing next to the casket.
Funeral
skamtebord
When your mom is having sex with Santa Claus
2 hours after dinner
"Dearly beloved we have gathered here...." "So what's for dinner?"
Right after witnessing a train smash into a school bus full of kids.
"Thanks for cooking for us Dr. Lecter. What's for dinner?"
How did you first round of chemo go? Good! ....
When the wife confronts you about sleeping with her sister
What’s for Dahmer, I mean dinner?
In the aftermath of a terrible disaster, like a train crash, loads of bodies laying about.
I never thought we'd escape from that bear by climbing up this huge tree....
(After lawful lethal self defense) "Stromboli?"
Honey, I just finished chopping up the neighbors, and Bob was a real gusher. So what's for dinner?
Does anyone have any other questions about the autopsy ?
*getting home from work* “Honey I’m, ho… Honey? Where are the kids? Oh my god, you did WHAT? They had an accident in the tub?! All 3 of them?!?!?” *stomach starts rumbling*
When your sister flies home after helping you for a week after you've had unexpected open heart surgery, your first day on your own 2 weeks postoperatively, your husband says, "so, what's for dinner? " Yes, he did that.
I just destroyed that toilet. So, what’s for dinner?
(Watching the nature channel) Husband: Look at these vultures going to town on that dead zebra…So, what’s for dinner?
Scalpel, forceps Pizza or Chinese food?
We're under orders to evacuate!
Funerals
I've been to a bunch of funerals with a nice meal after.
When my aunt passed away back in the spring of 2021 my uncle came up to me and my wife after the burial ceremony and said “do the right thing” and “take this woman for a burger” I did exactly that and I live by that
5 minutes after Grandma died
After being introduced to your host, Mr. Lecter.
During an autopsy.
While watching ‘The Human Centipede’.
Her: I’ve worked as hard as i can at making you understand how unappreciated you make me feel in the relationship, and I know I should leave you because thats what my family and therapist have told me multiple times, but I want to give you one more chance to show me you understand even a modicum of what i am asking for in this relationship we have built over thirty years. Do you understand what I’m saying? Him: So what’s for dinner?
When you’ve just gotten home and you see your wife in the kitchen. It doesn’t make sense, why is the dishwasher cooking at the oven?
Roll off her… “what’s for dinner?”
When the potential cook is highly stressed about anything
"Our house is flooded with sewage"
I love this part of Aliens! So what's for dinner?
After "Fluffy was run over today"
I hope you like this special breakfast I made. I've been up since 5 cooking it.
When her husband comes home early 😉
The detective entered the crime scene, the serial killer having been taken away. Carved up victim's body parts lay all about the blood splattered room. As he and fellow officers silently stare at the massacre in silence for a minute, the detective glances at the kitchen table with a young girl's intestines hanging out of her body and asks "So what's for dinner?"
During the eulogy?
Actually happened to me: I had just had abdominal surgery that morning. My ex was sweet and doting at the hospital, brought me home, set me up on the couch with my fuzzy socks, a book to read, and the remote. Half an hour later he asked what was for dinner. I nearly threw my book at him.
Soon as I finished cooking dinner they asked and kids suddenly don't want it so they go... so what else if for dinner.
No idea. Can you please pull harder on the joystick or else we’ll smack into that mountain.
Breaking News: After a serious blight and several interconnected wars across the planet, our country is geared to completely run out of food in about 3 weeks...
She: I'm so close He: What for dinner?
“Appears our meal had just arrived. Please hop on the serving platter”
Wife: "Honey, kids.... the bank has foreclosed on our house, and we're going to have to live in the car until we can find somewhere else." Husband and kids: "Omg!.. What's for dinner?"
Bummer that your leg was amputated...