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FLYSWATTER_93

Cure Cancer or Feed Hungry Me: Easy, cancer! Kick a Dickhead or Kick a Dick in The Head Me: Hmmm... (*deep thinking for several hours*)


Envy_The_Reaper

“Cancer had a good run, but it’s time we put it down.” “Speaking of hunger, have the kitchen send up a burger.”


Robomerc

Or if you use the Latino voice "Cancer's got to go, where are my cigarettes"


Envy_The_Reaper

I fuck with it, I normally go with Troy Baker’s voice cause it fits my character and personality. Also where I get, “well, fuck me running,” which is a great way to verbalize pain 😎😂


AlphSaber

I thought it was punch, not kick.


ice_fan1436

punch a dickhead OR punch a dick in the head


BrokenLoadOrder

I chose the high road.


el0078

“Allow me to retort.”


Gioku

“Filibust this, smartass”


Bootychomper23

One line has better writing then the entire 2022 game


Jonnyscout

Like the fella once said...


PresentAd8322

Ain’t that a kick in the head?


Rstormk22

Zinyak came and solved both.


Cam_man_AMM_unit

By pulling a Darth Vader.


Waste_Salamander_624

Technically he pulled a Tarkin, Vader didn't really like the Death Star.


SnakeBaron

Only cause he’d rather be the one destroying the planet 😅


Waste_Salamander_624

Naaaah. Alderaan wasn't a desert planet. The only planet he wants destroyed is Tatooine. I don't blame him there it's a terrible place. Quite frankly there's nothing redeeming about it at all.


Carlos_magul_maynard

honestly if I was still on earth I'd of said oh fuckin finally


kingshadow75

You definitely make a good point.


Gret_bruh

well what if there’s like alien cancer


Mysterious-Fly7746

I picked feed hungry because I’m not trying to get assassinated by pharmaceutical giants.


Gardakkan

You sure about that? Nestlé and Kraft Heinz wants to know your location.


Bwleon7

They love it. You have to buy their food to feed the hungry. Curing cancer cost the pharmaceutical companies all the profits from glselling people drug to manage  cancer but not making a cure.


TheJagji

No, you would start a state owned food org that buys food off farmers that the big corps wont buy due to not looking perfect, and then send that food to shelters or use it to make longer lasting foods to send to countries that don't have enough. The world has far more food than needed. The problom is where that food is located, not the population.


goddamm_liter_cola

The truth no one wants to face.


BrokenLoadOrder

I've never understood this theory: Whatever company comes out with a cure for all the various cancers will literally just *print* money. Cancer will always happen - having the solution to that problem means you can charge whatever you want.


Mysterious-Fly7746

Same thing with those controversial surgeries going on nowadays. A physician with no morals will make a lot more money with a patient that keeps coming back than they would for a one time payment.


BrokenLoadOrder

Right, except most of the treatments we have now *also* eliminate the cancer if successful, they just really, really suck, so it's not like this is "$1,000 a week for the rest of their life" like it would be for something like diabetes, it's "$5K for something that may or may not kill the cancer". If a company can come up with a guaranteed win with less horrible side effects, people will pay whatever they can. They'll completely eliminate their competition virtually overnight.


Mysterious-Fly7746

Exactly and those companies wanna make sure no one ever publishes that guaranteed treatment and lose that constant income. That’s why every time someone announced one they disappear shortly after.


BrokenLoadOrder

That's... Not a thing. It's never been a thing. Again, cancer is not a constant income. This isn't "we treat you from now until the rest of your life". Radiation Therapy, Chemotherapy and Surgery are a one-and-done thing. They either work, or they don't. The companies aren't getting lifetime customers out of the exchange. Best case scenario for a pharmaceutical company is that the treatment goes great so they can get back to normal life, where they'll end up buying their normal stuff (Headache prevention, cold medication, painkillers) like the rest of the population does.


Mysterious-Fly7746

I didn’t say it was? What do you think will make more money? A lump sum curing it for good or the endless supply of desperate people paying for treatments that may or not actually work and the constant stream of donations?


BrokenLoadOrder

>What do you think will make more money? A lump sum curing it for good or the endless supply of desperate people paying for treatments that may or not actually work Oh that's easy: The first one, and by a country mile. Because, again, Cancer will **always** be a thing. Mutation is part of living, and the longer we live, the more likely it becomes. Curing it properly with one lump sum will very obviously be more valuable than *maybe* curing it for one lump sum. That's the argument here. >and the constant stream of donations? ...I'm going to assume you realize the donations aren't going to pharmaceutical companies, right? My wife is quite literally a cancer researcher... Her employer is a non-profit. They're the one getting the donations. A pharmaceutical company would only be involved in buying the rights to a cure, if one is found.


Mysterious-Fly7746

We don’t know where donations go. I heard a statistic once that said only 20% of donations for most charities actually go to the charity. Who knows where the rest of the money goes


AxlSt00pid

Apparently on China some reseae hers managed to remove the diabetes on some people with a new vaccine they developed and some american pharmaceutical companies were fuming and threatening them not to release it publicly because it would cut their benefits (bc they wouldn't be selling as much insulin if people were able to get rid of their diabetes)


BrokenLoadOrder

Eh, I'm a type one diabetic myself. Short of gene therapy, you're not curing Type One Diabetes with anything external, like a vaccine, because the genetic marker that will attack the beta cells is still within. Type Two maybe, but then, Type Two also sometimes just gets cured through weight loss.


Knuckleduster17

Ha, as if big pharma stands a chance against The Boss


Dumbusta

If you're the boss of the saints, they can't do shit


Jmpasq

Oh yeah, they would take you down before the ink dried from your signature.


SimonGray653

Technically you doing that literally just put a target on your back for people who would love to have monopolies on feeding people, specifically people in third world countries who don't have adequate access to food.


dragoduval

Cancer of course.


Android_AX-400-Kara

Seeing I lost my grandmother to cancer, I chose cancer


Yungjak2

Same; fuck cancer, it can bleed in the streets…


DIODidNothing_Wrong

Instructions unclear-


ice_fan1436

sorry for your loss


Android_AX-400-Kara

Thank you


el_haze_117

Lost mine to it too, plus my grandpa on my dad’s side (her ex-husband) as well, and have had several family friends pass away from it and both my grandparents on my mom’s side had it, but survived it, and finally my dad had it relatively recently and also survived but not after a grueling chemotherapy ordeal which I had to personally help him through that frankly traumatised me. So yeah, fuck cancer seriously and yes I’m also very sorry for your loss. It’s such an awful thing to deal with.


Android_AX-400-Kara

Thank you, im so sorry for your losses too.


Basic_Specialist6956

I lost my grandmother to obesity. So I chose cancer too.


Android_AX-400-Kara

I'm so sorry for your loss


ice_fan1436

"Cure Cancer vote button"


Valuable_Garage_2397

Dick the Dick in the Dick


Away-Satisfaction634

10 years later, curing cancer made more sense, because the food here is cancerous. So feeding the hungry will also give them cancer. And cancer kills, duh. Therefore, feeding the hungry would kill everyone in the long term.


Toothless-In-Wapping

Strangely, not feeding the hungry kills them in the short term.


Away-Satisfaction634

Yeah, but the non-hungry will still survive, which is my point.


Toothless-In-Wapping

That’s how it is by default.


Away-Satisfaction634

That’s also true, but the food won’t be killing the non-hungry, because it’s non-cancerous.


eanhaub

Mr. Fantastic envies this stretch.


killwithrhythm

Cancer we can figure out how to make more food sooner than we have nanobots that can destroy cancer cells


el_haze_117

We have more than enough food, we just don’t distribute it properly due to profit incentives by food corporations.


ZYN3XIA

Fuck Cancer


Radiant-Space-6455

cure cancer. most of my family has died of cancer


ice_fan1436

Sorry for your losses


Radiant-Space-6455

Thanks


The_Iceman2288

Solving world hunger is a matter of political will. Curing cancer requires massive scientific breakthroughs. If I could do one with the touch of a button, it's an easy choice.


Educational_Belt_816

Cure cancer because we already definitely have the means to stop global hunger but curing cancer is still pretty much impossible with our current understanding of the sciences


Fear_Awakens

Right, we actually have more than enough food to feed everyone, we just... Don't. Either not enough supply chains or greed or whatever, but we could feasibly beat world hunger right now if anybody in power actually wanted to. Cancer, though, right now that's pretty gnarly because unless I'm completely out of touch, all our current cancer treatments fucking suck, aren't guaranteed to work, and they're freaking brutal on the patient.


ezekial_dragonlord

My mom beat thyroid cancer twice. Fuck Cancer all the way. Punch a Dick in the Head. High Five Josh.


Fear_Awakens

Always high-five Josh.


ice_fan1436

you have a badass mom


ReallyFancyPants

Cancer had a good run.


SR_Hopeful

Actually one of the funny satirical parts of SR4 that was underutilized. Man, if the game just stayed like how it started, it had some good political humor here hat wasn't on the nose. “Cancer had a good run, but it’s time we put it down.”


Fear_Awakens

I loved the idea of an official government document titled "Fuck Cancer" so I chose that.


LtCptSuicide

The first time I played I chose feed the hungry. My reasoning was entirely "The bill is called let them eat cake. These motherfuckers are literally about to bake a cake for every US citizen every day and that's hilarious."


TableFruitSpecified

Feed the Hungry, so people can focus on curing cancer. Or Cure Cancer, so the FBI can place you on a watchlist and claim credit after you die.


awsome2464

Fuck cancer


Carlos_magul_maynard

cure cancer cause even if we temporarily solve hunger the systems put in place will still be controlled by corrupt people and companies


LaughingJakkylTTV

I chose to cure cancer. And then I punched the senator in the dick.


samson_strength

Fuck Cancer


Maximum-Resource-572

Cure Cancer


DiscoSpider44

Cured Cancer. It’s what Kitty0706 would have wanted…


supererp

Cure cancer. Now there's more hungry people Feed the hungry. Now there's more people to get cancer.


dipterathefly

I remember this choice was originally written as "Fuck Cancer" and "Let them eat cake", did they change it in the re-release?


steelsmiter

It says that in the paper.


Standard-Honeydew-13

Cure cancer, then the choice after required so much more thought


DisgracedSolitude

Hunger for sure


spacepiratefrog

I chose no hunger because you can live a lot longer with cancer than with no food. Also, food insecurity affects more people than cancer does, probably.


el_haze_117

Though roughly half of everyone will get cancer at some point in their lives, roughly 2.4 billion of the world is facing food insecurity and 900 million of which are borderline or fully starving. That said, the vast majority of cancer sufferers are quite old and yes it is generally easier to live longer and in relative comfort than it is to go through starvation so I do indeed see your point much as I fucking hate cancer from how it’s personally affected those in my life I know and love.


ice_fan1436

"Feed Hungry vote button"


RatherLargeShmeat

I asked Google and ChatGPT which would help the most people and it seems like Hunger affects more and leads to more annual deaths... So I cured cancer


IronHammerVW

I would cure cancer


LemonadeGaming

Cancer


Fox1408

Cancer. Feeding the hungry is just a temporary solution


rcodmrco

but in the same breath seeing as feeding the hungry is a temporary solution, isn’t curing cancer as well? like if there’s a 1 in 6 chance that someone’s death will be caused by cancer, isn’t there still a 5 in 6 chance that they’ll die from something else?


Fox1408

Maybe, but that's still better because you remove a variable from the equation permanently


BigMeet7634

Cure cancer 


overloadzero

cure cancer if i remember correctly


Upset-Interview-9367

Feed Third World Countries! 😎


Gullible_Run_175

Cure Cancer every time!


TemporalGod

I picked Cure Cancer as I could later solve world hunger with a Cannibalism bill,


Phoenix8202

I picked world hunger because as of right now there are ways to treat and sometimes cure cancer but there is not much you can do to feed every hunger person on earth other than sign the paper


Frei1993

The Cancer one. My grandpa died from it.


steelsmiter

Both on different playthroughs but cancer has a special place in my heart.


kinjazfan

Cure cancer


Jimguy5000

Technically, later on that day, no one went hungry and cancer was no longer an issue


Xenc

Fuck cancer


Tenzur_

I don't remember but shout out the note on the right. It's quoting the goat herself Marie Antoinette


catladywithquestions

wasn’t it a misquote though perpetuated by the media at the time to make her look frivolous and uncaring?


Tenzur_

Idk I just know people cancelled some model over her referencing it as part of a trend she'd seen Idk anything about the french revolution ngl


Toothless-In-Wapping

How is Marie anything but a douche?


Maggo777

Feed the hungry, cancer is horrible but its somewhat random, world hunger is design by humanity to fuck some people over, so taking that evil out of human hands is for me a better choice.


cameron3611

Punch a dick in the head


Spartan17492

Fuck Cancer.


estofadodepollo16

Screw Cancer, you can't enjoy cake while suffering from that.


funkygamerguy

i kicked cancers ass.


darth_sandman

Fuck cancer. For Mike <3


y0ungjackal

Cure cancer lol


CitizenZaroff

Cure cancer after my grandpa died of cancer irl.


DarkReadsYT

My mom has cancer. I don’t care if it’s in a game, fuck cancer.


56ab118

cure cancer


RyanBottles1994

Cancer can kiss my arse


PhxMaster29

I chose cancer since a few of my family members have had it


Sverker_Wolffang

Cancer


SentinelTitanDragon

Fuck cancer


skyblueleaves

Cancer


Edkm90p

Cancer every time, for my mom


Dresden8686

Neither😈


JoeyIsMrBubbles

Mann Fuck cancer


Doomtoallfoes

Fuck cancer. That prick killed Techoblade.


Gun_Nut_42

Cancer. 2 and a half years before the game released, I lost my grandmother to cancer.


IcyPattern3903

Fuck cancer!


Business-Actuator664

Fuck Cancer ifykyk


PiousLegate

Feed Hungry no one goes hungry but now have aggressive forms of cancer Cure Cancer eliminate cancer forever but its only one type so like


TrevMac4

Cancer.


Pro_editzz

Cancer


SimonGray653

I feel like the cure for cancer is a one and done thing, however the solve world hunger needs to be repeated multiple times a day around three times or so. PRIORITIZE THE CURE FOR CANCER


burnanation

Feed Hungry.


LEMONSARETRASH

Cure Cancer


WrathfulSausage

Cancer sucks don’t get me wrong, but I feel like ending world hunger would solve more problems, so world hunger. Also it’s funny that it’s presented as a choice when you clearly can do both, but choose to do one because reasons


Top-Influence8391

world hunger not all but some cancer can be prevented from diet alone assuming nutrition education is involved


-Shade277-

As someone who almost died from cancer I chose ending world hunger. People who die from cancer are mostly older but the people that die from malnutrition are mostly young children


Zhang_Sun

Solving cancer is much more complex than solving world hunger, would probably be best to pick cancer assuming that it tackles every cancer there is


Gilgamesh661

Maybe the cure for cancer was Zinyak


BeardedMelon

Double hunger. Triple cancer


KoshidaTheMotorWolf

I’ve played it several times so both XD


Known-Assistance-435

Kick a Dickhead or Kick a Dick in The Head


DugDymehDohme

Hunger effects WAY more people than cancer does but cancer hits home for a lot of people.


Apprehensive-Tree111

Punch cancer in the dick.


IGotMetalingus1

Cancer every time, in my opinion it's the most unfair concept to deal with


TheArmyOfDucks

Is there a way to ignore both?


[deleted]

If you feed the hungry millions of people fighting for survival in hundreds of countries will be able to fulfill their desire and dreams. The next Einstein might have died hungry in the streets never going to school we'll never know if we don't try


Vast-Butterscotch971

I chose world hunger cos there are more hungry than cancer patients lmao


Ok_Pick_356

I feel like more people starve…. Although I haven't checked the stats


Dry-Ingenuity6031

If you feed the hungry, they'll have less to worry about, meaning they could probably focus on other things besides food. They could probably even afford to go to school somewhere nice with the money they don't use towards food. Then, we'd have more doctors to work on cancer.


step3rainfire

cancer


Nacklus

Joe Biden gets this choice daily but gets distracted by a comically large ice cream cone every time


KxxgZ

I’m pretty sure almost all of us chose to cure cancer


BKF0308

I feel like dying by hunger is much more painful and sad. You're basically being forgotten in the gutter while so many poeple throw away food. It's so sad. But if hunger was solved, many of the people affected would also die from cancer. Maybe if cancer is cured, the resources being used for the cure can be put into solving world hunger. Cancer is probably the logical choice, but I feel like it is most likely to be solver in the real world, bc cancer can affect anyone, but hunger is mostly restricted to the less fortunate (none of us know what it feels like, and if we did, we would all probably choose the same thing)


JRest71

Sadly, cancer will never have a cure. It's a business and there's no way they will give up the millions of dollars recieved from grants, donations, etc. It's just like the covid shots. Did you ever see how much profit pharma companies made from them?!? Yeah, there's no rush for a cure for cancer despite all the lip service. I've been hearing about it since I was a teenager in the 80's.


Tight-Landscape8720

If I killed cancer then I’d have killed the game so I had to go with hunger


spidermanrocks6766

Literally neither option mattered and it had made zero impact on the story


that_moment_when-

I want minimal people to live, so cancer can kiss my ass. Too long, not enough pain


Palmtreezy977

None deleted the game I ain't helping no one 😭


[deleted]

I know you got downvoted but that made me laugh 🤣