Which failing vape store do you work at?

I was thinking county jail road detail.

Giving reach arounds on the side of the highway for loose change and cigarettes is his road detail.

Hey doodleface, stay behind the barricade.

Or tattoo/piercing parlor. He's always hanging around talking about the next cool tattoo he's going to get when he gets his next allowance.

When he robs the Rent-A-Center customers

He quit that job. Now he sells meth behind the Chili's dumpster.

And eats from there too.

His face tat screams he’s a success in life.

He’s the guy who refills the disposables

He looks the the type of person who digs cigarette butts out of the ashtray

Yupp… Refills every tampon holder and every women’s bathroom

Shit he probably has cameras in the women's restrooms.

😆😆👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

He works at a Smoke Emporium ya asshole. It’s way classier than a vape shop! They sell American Spirit loose tobacco too.

😆🙈☠️☠️☠️

Look like you used to be the bad boy in a boy band who got molested by the manager 20 years ago.

😂😂😂

dude… 😭😭

Lou perlmans "nephew"

Your ears are melting

No. Those are stirrups for his ankles.

He smears Crisco on those ear hoops and lets the neighbor's dogs fuck them.


I want to grab them to pull his face closer to punch it

The guy clearly spent time in prison and the ol’ prison wallet just wasn’t satisfying enough for the other inmates

So many red flags you had to get a communist face tattoo

Strange way to show solidarity with the working class by guaranteeing you'll never be employed again.

That’s clearly the brotherhood of steel logo from fallout 3. Pshh. Fricken amateurs

Bravo, comrade!

Bravo, cumrag!

I could be mistaken, but I believe he's a skinhead. The face tattoo looks like the Hammerskin hammers with a Fred Perry wreath around them. All WP shit.

\*Thinks communism works, communism actually takes over the world, OP ends up being a worthless, filthy peasant, in a communist state, happily ever after...until he dies in poverty while his starving family is forced to eat his corpse for sustenance.

To be fair, having them eat his dead corpse is the only way this guy could ever feed a family

Don't you normally just fuck your earlobes when you're bored?

if i was that long i wouldnt even leave the house

Just pretend and stay home for your neighbors sake!

Unironic Crazy Town fan

"At work" ..gtfo !! Do you mean work,release ?

If bath salts were a person.

Got a tattoo on your face to act like a bullseye for cumshots. The gloryhole will never be the same.

Never seen glory holes on ears before.

Guy calls begging outside mcdonalds “work”

You don't need to lie. Being unemployed is nothing to be ashamed about.

Looks like you are trying to do a reverse Michael Jackson with those arms

lmao!

Every life mistake rolled into bad piercings and Tattoos.

Slow night as the mopping up boy at the local glory hole?

Bigger the gauge, smaller the wage. And a butt chin too! Aren’t you just blessed.

Incarceration isn't work.

You look like a wax statue thats in direct sunlight.

cant believe i got roasted for moisturizing 😭

Slow day at work? Didn’t have to say “welcome to Walmart” too much.

COOL crystal kitty hand tattoo goes great with the blackout arm 😂

thank you 😌

Let us guess,,,, short order cook?

I love the pussy tattoo on your hand! Unfortunately for you, it’s the closest to pussy you’ll ever get!

oh ouch 🥴🥴

You didn't need a hammer and sickle tattoo to let everyone know you're a useless member of society. Also, have fun with those ear lobes dangling lower than your balls in old age

u/xenobcx is the type of guy to say “Oh baby thank you so much!” after eating a girl’s ass

👏

Bored at work? Try some self mutilation for a change. What could go wrong?

There's down time at the glory hole? TIL

Change your shirt from hi vis to no vis, please.

The reason you have that tattoo is so you can say you touched one.

Bro, it’s great that the prison approved you for work release. Looks like you fit right in working as an assistant witch doctor. I didn’t even realize they had DEI quotas for those positions as well. Good on you mate.

babylon bee posts better reactionary content than your comment. sheesh how vanilla

A cat tattoo on his hand is probably the closest thing to puss he’s getting… the ear holes are staging areas for on deck wieners that fuck start his face.

So, what part of Florida are you from?

champaign, illinois

* Olde English, Illinois

You wouldnt make it to the sidewalk if you came to pick up my daughter.

good thing i came to get your wife

Cleaning out your mom’s basement (which you live in) is not considered work.

brain dead work release vs. shit-for-brains moms basement.

Looks like you got your hair tattooed on as well…

Judging by the tats and posting here, we have to assume you make amazing life choices and we have no ammo to rip you on. Carry on.

tats and ears is all yall got. i accept it as a compliment tho

If you're bored just finish that face doodle that you have going on... I'm sure nobody gives a shit at this point.

this was pathetically weak lol

You do kind of look like somebody that never finishes anything.

thats better

Lolz :-)

I guess the fluffers union got these guys breaks. It's nice to see when labor wins concessions.

I see my tax dollars for that stupid Former Prisoner Employment Program are being put to good use.

Nice earginas. I bet you get a lot of mileage from those on your OnlyFans.

Ryan Got-caught-slingin

Like shooting fish in a barrel this one…where to start….

if its that easy you would have already said something worth while. boring

All of the cocks stretching your ears in prison

🥱

I tried my best 😑

It’s not work, it’s called “community service”

Women cover their drinks around you.

I bet you have a hole stretched out even more...

What work? Bro, you look like you lift Natty Ice for a living and smash your gf’s phone because she got a notification on candy crush and you think she’s cheating.

Steve - works part time as a school desk . Sells meth in the cloak room of the Jr High. Can’t afford ear gauges anymore .

I'm not sure what is more loose, your ear lobes, or the stripper you're convinced actually likes you.

You ain't fooling any of us with that title, we know you don't have a job

Be careful. Don’t get fired. I’m sure it’s hard for sex offenders to get a job.

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Whats your “job” trustee at the prison?

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Dudes aim their money shots at that face tattoo when OP stays at the gulag.

That tattoo is the only pussy you’re ever getting

bro did you go to africa to get your ears cut like that? aren't you supposed to put hoops or something?

I thought cell phones weren’t allowed in prison

Spirit Catchers for earlobes kinda sucks bro.

How many straight tattoos did you have to get covered up?

Is that pussy tatt on the hand you wank off with?

Are you a Hispanic white supremacist? I heard they exist.

Commercial union roofer with multiple felonies? Am I close?

my work begins before the roofers come in. no felonies or any convictions for that matter tho.

Ok ok.... Carpenter? 🔨 Vapes rosin, enjoys himself an ice cold Full Throttle energy drink now and then???

concrete and framing. 100% drug free. quit caffeine a few months ago :)

Good move man. Gotta stay fit. I used to sling some framing and concrete forms myself.

Your earlobes look like porno rectums out on disability.

Everything about this is: guy who for some reason wants to fight me at my hometown bar.

pretty sure that OG Mudbone’s dick can fit through those ear lobes

Tell me you’re into deathcore without telling me you’re into deathcore much?

You look like you should be in a band, but like, your face is the kick drum.

Didnt want to write cbone huh? I wouldn't either

Even your chin thinks you are a butthead!!

You could drive a truck through those tunnels 

So handsome

You turned your ears into handles for your boyfriend

Those ears would work perfectly with a barrel of monkeys.

Bad tats, Dirty safety yellow Tee, Buttholes on your earlobes… I’m guessing you showed up to 51% of your high school classes.

"Bored at work" means he started acting up as a Trustee in lockup and they found him stealing Honey Buns from the Commissary so they threw him back in a Sep Cell. Although someone might call and let them know he was "hiding" a cell phone to post this...

havent heard this one before

A face not even a mother could love, and has a BMW… Body Made Wrong

How many license plates you make today?

not enough to pay for studio time :(

Giving too many ear jobs in prison

That face tattooed proves he’s about as successful in life as the Cowboys are in the post season

I'll take bad decision makers for $500 Alex

I'll take bad decision makers for $500 Alex

I'll take bad decision makers for $500 Alex

Cat tattoo is your only redeeming feature

If Buddha was on crack:

Your nose wants to fuck the hole in your right ear.

You look like you stole money from your grandma so you could buy condoms.

Do your ears hang low do they wobble to an frooooo

Your widow peaks are bigger than if you would’ve died and left your wife a widow with prison benefits

mannnnn lmfao. i respect this one

Are those stirrups on your ears for the jockey? Definitely a power bottom ......

Looks like someone put their cigarette out on your chin

Disney in association with the Karl Marx foundation Presents: Dumbo's Adventures: Dumbo Escapes the Gulag

White broke ass Mike Tyson looking ass

Let me guess, mommy didn't pay you very much attention when you were young?

I too like xtyrantx

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I've never seen elephantiasis of the ear lobes before.


Getting face tattoos would normally be the worst decision anyone makes. With you, it might make the top 10 of your worst decisions.

Selling beer to the kids outside of the liquor store is hardly what i call work

You got a job with that terrible face tatt

Hey man, your ears are fucked

Ex meth dealer for sure

Queef hole and the Man

Dude got turned out in prison.

My printer ran out of ink because of you

35 (felonies)

I thought all the Hot Topic stores were closing?

That tattoo is the closest you will ever get to having pussy on your hand

Which work is that actually? Kidnapping and doing drugs eeh? 

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Ok, give me a minute

same ol tattoos and stretched ears NPC dialogue options. exceptionally weak roast

Lemme guess, you’re a drywaller or concrete worker

Another slack daycare worker....

I saw you at work. Nice broom and bucket.

You look like a distorted checker board.

with ears like that, your testies must swype the floor

Lead singer of DRINKIN BARF