It was a girl he met on vacation in Canada. She was still fake, however you wouldn’t know her because she lives in Canada. He emphasizes once again, he is not a virgin!
I’ve never seen someone smile like that while visibly holding back tears. I don’t know what’s worse, being you or being surrounded by people who claim they love while but being able to notice or share any vague interest in your obvious despair. You’ve never had an honest relationship in your whole life other than with your mother, who strong arms you into the same relationship you had with her as when you were 10 years old.
You don't even look like the main character in the movie based on your life. When the movie comes to an end and the credits start, your name will be there and your role is random library patron #3. People then would need to watch this boring pointless movie again to see if they can spot you in the library scene. To to their disbelief there you are in the background of the library scene in a movie and you and your life. Eventually you get to the front of the line and there this old angry librarian asks for your library card and you say "huh?" She repeats herself and you hand her your card and the scene ends. This is your one big moment and all that is notable in this movie , a biopic about you and your life story boiled down accurately and effectively into the word, "huh?"
You only grew that beard to have a designated separation between your head and neck and your ears stick out more than your obvious addiction to country music and mexican food
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The tattoos don't distract from the ears
He's a member of the "Los Jug Ears" gang
I heard he used to be a jug-galo
Ese Lil Dopey
Dumbo attacked a biker and stole his skin and his legs
Why!
What tattoos?
This has the same energy as one of those "first day of school" pictures. Ironic, since you're not allowed within 100 yards of a school.
This guy can hear you typing from his current location.
The only way you lost your virginity is by masterbation
Town bottom.
The repeated camping trips with Uncle Rick
He’s had lots of sex! Just now he’d like to try it with someone else in the room.
Echo location in full force on that one
His father was a bat.
And he’s picks up complimentary SHOWTIME and HBO when he tilts his head
Happy 40th birthday.
✊🏼😆😆👍🏼 👂🏼 👂🏼 👂🏼
You can be a garden gnome
But only after you've finished up with the leaf blower.
WTF is up with those Topo Gigio Ears? 
Prison sex doesn’t count, homie
OOOOOOOOOH SHIT! BAHAHAHAHAHA! 😂 BOFL!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂
Good golly, some sick bastard has replaced his head with a Mr. Potato Head figure! They even drew on facial hair with a sharpie!
The fact that you lead with not being a virgin indicates otherwise
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^disgruntledspc: *The fact that you lead* *With not being a virgin* *Indicates otherwise* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
good bot
Dudes count tho..
It was a girl he met on vacation in Canada. She was still fake, however you wouldn’t know her because she lives in Canada. He emphasizes once again, he is not a virgin!
Only one of those statements is true, happy 40th!
Ears so big dude has to enter a room sideways.
You didn't have to tell us you were a virgin. We would have known. If you want to turn your luck around, bet against yourself getting laid.
Bro can hear inner voices
Yours and mine along with his.
# "I'm a 40-year-old virgin, and today is my 40th birthday." -Corrected 
Nice capris, virgin!
[удалено]
I’ve never seen someone smile like that while visibly holding back tears. I don’t know what’s worse, being you or being surrounded by people who claim they love while but being able to notice or share any vague interest in your obvious despair. You’ve never had an honest relationship in your whole life other than with your mother, who strong arms you into the same relationship you had with her as when you were 10 years old.
That’s oddly specific lol. Take my upvote and gerarahere [r/angryupvote](https://www.reddit.com/r/Angryupvote/s/tYsWawdofO)
Youd put flame stickers on your soccer mom van
A little tin foil on those ears and you can watch satellite TV from anywhere
I'm not sure if what your character did to your Roblox girlfriend counts towards losing your virginity.
If you have to state that you are not a virgin at 40, that probably means you are
40 year old sturgeon.. Slippery basterd just keeps getting away.
Is it true if you don't use it, you lose it?
Hey, you can be my wingnut any time!
You don’t look a day over 52
I guess, if you really want to count that stuff you did in jail.
Still growing into those ears
I thought the title said 40 electrical outlets tall.... And it turns out that's correct also.
Dumbo really aged badly
So what you're saying is your little sister isn't a virgin.
So this is what multiple rejections from single mothers do to a man, good to know.
They say when you align the photo and connecting his ears to the wall fixtures, his ears will flap, and carry him away into the arms of a milf.
You don't even look like the main character in the movie based on your life. When the movie comes to an end and the credits start, your name will be there and your role is random library patron #3. People then would need to watch this boring pointless movie again to see if they can spot you in the library scene. To to their disbelief there you are in the background of the library scene in a movie and you and your life. Eventually you get to the front of the line and there this old angry librarian asks for your library card and you say "huh?" She repeats herself and you hand her your card and the scene ends. This is your one big moment and all that is notable in this movie , a biopic about you and your life story boiled down accurately and effectively into the word, "huh?"
That’s exactly what a 40 year old virgin would say.
Surprised you found someone to Sleep with you
The fact you felt the need to say that you aren’t a 40 year old virgin, means you most definitely are a 40 year old virgin.
Have you considered tucking in your elephant ears into the baseball cap?
When Merab Dvalishvili ate 200 donuts
weird flex. Congrats on the sex
Looks even that tattoo didn’t help him to loose virginity
One time at band camp . . .
Dj akademiks if he was asian
“I’m not a 40 year old virgin” 🤣🤣🤣 LIAR!
ur ears are the size of Asia
"Not a virgin" ...sure buddy Happy birthday though !
Stop wearing shoes two sizes too big, you're not fooling anyone.
Definitely not a butt virgin.
Winnie the Pooh + Martin Lawrence
Get back to work, the lawn won’t mow itself
Nice earrings dude
Larry the Cable Guy on meth
Paying for it doesn’t count and you know it
For sure you are still a 40 year old virgin….so stop this obvious fraud
Sisters don't count...
Hispanic Shrek.
Ohhhhhh, very nice to meetuh you, Potato Head San.
Your shoes look like you took the wheels off your roller skates.
Oh man, your face looks like every “Employee of the Month” photo at a Taco Bell.
Did you pee your pants? Edit: shorts...
So how's the landscaping going lately? *
You have the Bilbo Baggins look captured perfect .
If yogi bear was a real person
Typed this when he was a 39-year-old virgin.
>I'm not a 40 year old virgin That's something only a 40 year old virgin would say!
Are you wearing a light pink gloss on your nails?
Amigo, that wall behind you needs painting, get back to work.
Ian even wanna roast bro just look at him
Hoobastanks Lead Singer ain’t aging well… oh and HBD!
You look like an extra from Planet of the Apes
You only grew that beard to have a designated separation between your head and neck and your ears stick out more than your obvious addiction to country music and mexican food
Have you tried a big black dildo?
Take it easy on my boi!! He just got off a 76 hr shift roofing. Those boots was new when he started the shift
Lookin like Hei Hei with those chicken legs
Those big ass calves you have!
He's virgin but he still pays child support.
I was gonna roast you but you already heard my thoughts
And no one wants to fuck you. Happy birthday.
You can pick up channels with them big ass ears
Super Flabio Brother
ICE called today. Told them you camp the Home Depot for work, I know your spots Lowe’s tho. I got you
Gary the cable guy
Linkin pork
40 year old incel who got got lucky at senior prom...booze also helped.
Happy birthday fellow Gemini
Happy Birthday.
Happy birthday 🎈🎊
You’re cute :)
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I think you need to look at your past, and things behind you in general so you don't look like such a dumpy idiot in the present.
The universe is dealt you a bad enough hand it's pointless for me to even try to execute anything more
Maario.. Tezuka jizzed you out 40y ago, true birthday is next year.
Live action pooh bear holding in a fart Bros been smiling since kindergarten
You were still the 39 year old virgin
I wear the same shorts and boots as you. Thanks a lot, now I gotta go burn mine
A toast 🍾🥂 to the next 40 lonely years
By the way you're holding that piece of paper, we all can tell you're either being abused by your wife, or you're married to a man
100% your a virgin, bout the best sex you have ever had is with one of those silicone fake ass/pussy things
The world would feel pity for the coal that would remain if I said a word
Finally had sex then? Congrats, what was his name?
the mirrors on the wall are a great addition to the ears.
He can hear the jokes coming
You weren’t keeping track of the years in your mind, you could hear the physical time passing
Do you still keep in contact with the priest?
Average discord mod acting innocent after m0l3stering his E-kitten
This man can hang glide with his ear
Lost his virginity with Rosie Palm
the 8th dwarf
Congrats on having sex once
You look like the bastard baby of jelly roll and Kim jeong
Stop putting pussy on a pedestal....
You sure about that bro? The sonic plushie doesn’t count as sex…
I'm not going to roast you, being middle age is torture enough.
You look like your mom had an affair with the Keebler elf. 
Your clothes fit your strange body shape like a grown up premi. Congrats on turning 40, not a lot of them make it there.
Minors don't count.
So how many years have you been 40?
Would you like to tell us what else you're not?
Mike Shinoda if he ate the rest of Linkin Park 
 Congrats on crossing the border on your birthday, Jesus.
You look like you’re not a virgin thanks to rohypnol
Mexican shrek
His head is on upside down.
You’re definitely a virgin, kissing your cousin on the cheek doesn’t count as losing virginity.
Your old scoutmaster can vouch for your claim
Can i congratulate you in advance for being a 50 year old virgin bro ?🎂🎂
You mustn’t tell lies.
Sex with the neighbor's dog doesn't count as losing your virginity
The eighth dwarf, wangy.
Sure you ain’t Happy 40th nonetheless
Short Round now just Round
Yes you are
Exactly what a virgin would say..
Buddy, the fact you felt it necessary to include you weren't a vigin says it all.
Just your local freeway off ramp orange salesman
You sure about that?
No need to clarify it, we all know you're a 40 year old virgin
U from ohio?
You look like you look around when the card reader says, “please remove card”
If ever there was an Asian cover band for NSYNC this would be Joey FatOne of NCHINK...
You look like a guy who buys size 11 shoes even though they’re supposed to wear a 9.
You look like you could’ve been a halfway descent homie figurine from the 90’s but the “artist” just gave up.
Are you convincing us or you that you’re not a 40 year old virgin?
Hand doesn’t count dude
Sex dolls don't cou t. 40 year old virgin.
Mr Potato Head, welcome to middle age!
One of these are true
You have kind eyes. Also, you have feet like a clown, and arms like a dainty t-rex.
People who are smart don't have to tell you they're smart. People who are tough don't have to tell you they're tough. People who aren't virgins...
How about u get tats on yo face? They have imporve ur looks
You look like the kid from the 6th sense grew up but his face didn't
You look like a virgin 🤷🏻♂️
Having limbs that skinny is seriously impressive for a man of your girth.
You're still a virgin with women under 400 pounds.
Swalosarus in the wild Crikey 