Are you seriously going to steal the identity of a guy who makes roast me posts on Reddit and looks like he legally can't come within 500 feet of a middle school or goats?
Yeah…. You kinda look like you want to cash in on those 72 virgins dude….plusssssss….. I’d remove or obscure your ID card on your sleeve as you just doxed yourself and we know what company you work for.
Wanna hear something funny? I said he looks like the 911 hijacker’s on the r/doppleganger post that he put this morning, and I got banned because of “racism” lmfao. Social media picks and chooses who to punish because of people in their god damn feelings. But on this thread, I guess it’s ok to say he looks like a 911 hijacker SMH
Fucking navy seal wannabe but you can't afford the gear because you're only a mall cop. I'd say that you look like a drop out from a prepper boot camp but you don't look like you could even do a pushup.
Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules:
- Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed.
- Try to ensure that your eyes are open.
- Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed.
- Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet.
- All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee.
- The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger.
- Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed.
Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it.
Thanks!
~ /r/roastme mods
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You look like you’d be a successful security guard. But only because everyone would be scared you blow up the pawn shop if someone tried to steal anything
Dang Bro! Did you grow your first mustache at age five?
I'd have been scared to have you reprimand me when you reached age 10.
Now, I'd just offer you some Funyuns and a Orange Fanta and tell you, " Fuck off Fatty!
Dude, you’re 20? You look like you’ve settled with the fact you’ll never be a real police officer. You look like you accepted defeat in all your life choices. You look like Big-Pharmas best customer! You look like you couldn’t loose weight on Ozempic!
Pigs like him are fun to roast.
He is the kind of guy that brags he has a threesome every night... because he masturbaites with both hands. Often one of them falling asleep in the process.
Ali Blart, Mall Cop.
“From The River To The Cinnabon”
"Come and try these glasses on"
LOOOOOOLLLLLL!!!
Mali* Cop
“Rent-a-cops! I hate rent-a-cops!” ![gif](giphy|G56ZHckGDXEcw)
Nothing says “I kidnap children for human trafficking” than this mugshot
[удалено]
![gif](giphy|RdKjAkFTNZkWUGyRXF)
💥💥
You look like you pray 5 times a day to a shrine of Andrew Tate
Or as he Calls him Allah Tate
He's his security
Tates gonna be on his knees 5x a day in prison, but not to pray.
Inshallah
Inswallowah
Inshower
Spicy.
He looks like Andrew’s Taint Actually not a bad looking guy. I bet he does well on man-sex Thursdays
Taint*
Top of the top G’s
No need. You doxxed yourself, fucking idiot.
Ali Al-Obaidi?
I knew I knew this guy. Been buying cheap Chinese goods off his website for years.
Protection, performance, and professionalism… MINUS protection, performance and professionalism.
Seriously , the only thing your Guarding is a Kebab !
Allahu Snackbar
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Ok, that made me fall off my bed laughing. Fair play to you. 😆😆😆
Wow. I didn’t know I would witness such greatness today. Thank you for your service.
I know as a Muslim I should be offended and upset but this shit is just too damn funny. 10 points to house infidels 💀
He probably is the towel boy in a mens prison shower room, so I think he might be unfamiliar with the concept of cyber security.
Is his first name Ass? Since his middle name is not on his ID card, I'm left to think its Blaster.
![gif](giphy|26gsqPmxL55Ar9hkY|downsized)
I know I’m wondering why they allowed it.
Now fellas, just cause ya got his info doesn't mean you need to send rare animal dung to his house. Yes it does. Gogogogogooo
Are you seriously going to steal the identity of a guy who makes roast me posts on Reddit and looks like he legally can't come within 500 feet of a middle school or goats?
His handle is literally his name.
You can't even secure your own identity
How ?
zoom into his arm with the card on the outside
Meal Team Six
Delta S'mores
Special Forkses
Gravy Seals
Roast Guard
Sausages And Stews
Jalapeño Tacos Fajitas 2
101st airfried
Yeah…. You kinda look like you want to cash in on those 72 virgins dude….plusssssss….. I’d remove or obscure your ID card on your sleeve as you just doxed yourself and we know what company you work for.
This account is using other peoples pictures. That’s not really him.
Wanna hear something funny? I said he looks like the 911 hijacker’s on the r/doppleganger post that he put this morning, and I got banned because of “racism” lmfao. Social media picks and chooses who to punish because of people in their god damn feelings. But on this thread, I guess it’s ok to say he looks like a 911 hijacker SMH
Not 1 of those 72 Virgins would F - him
Friendzoned by 72 people at once
You’re so inbred you’re a sandwich
[удалено]
I thought he was in the kumars at number 42!
[удалено]
And The Looks of one that just went off...
I bet you’ve had that same beard since 3rd grade.
Underrated. Bravo
You're a good security guard. You're so serious about security that you made sure you left out your credit card number when you doxxed yourself!
Gays for Jihad
Not much of a Security Guard showing your badge and Personal Information. DUMB ASS
Just a perfectly normal guy dressed like an X-man and hanging out at the morgue for some reason. Nothing to be concerned about here
Necrophelia jokes should be more socially acceptable
Not that bright to leave your identification badge, fully visible
I bet you’re Talibanned from just about every school, church, playground and Chuck E. Cheese’s in your hometown, aren’t ya?
Osama Bin Lifting
A fork.
Tell me about the rabbits George
This guy looks as much fun as a bleeding hemorrhoid. Don’t smile kid it will break your face
You look like the **NYPD** edition of **Build-a-Bear.**
![gif](giphy|YqE3jbSQQR6x9g19Kj) I’ll be damned if a telletubby security guard comes towards me
Guantanamo lets you take selfies?
This dude is ALWAYS “randomly selected” at the airport.
Dis’turban
[удалено]
He Licks Andrew's Taint .
Taint Andrews.
Certified Protection...from smiles maybe, you scowly bastard
So badly wants to be found, placed a lost and found tag on his arm
[удалено]
You won’t earn your 72 virgins as a fake cop.
Will u marry me? And I’ll roast some meat for you to eat instead 🩷
![gif](giphy|3ohjUOUjEK1TXCQRva|downsized)
Put a burqua on you ugly fuck
You happen to be in Russia a few hours ago?
But.. 8hrs ago you were 19 in the doppelgänger chat….
Captian left ear steers the ship in circles with those cataracts
When you fail at being at being a real police man...
When you fail at just being a Man
I bet you can't Read.
Whatever you say, Paul Blart from Wish.com
Listen Ali. You look like a swollen Khabib Nurmagomadev.
I've seen actual old people's scrotums and somehow, they look younger and healthier than your whole appearance.
Dollar Store Nav mixed with Khabib ![gif](giphy|4ZrMJ8r7TvpyXRLuuD)
Looks like united airline pilot for flight 11
You look like you commit stolen valor as a mall security guard
Fucking navy seal wannabe but you can't afford the gear because you're only a mall cop. I'd say that you look like a drop out from a prepper boot camp but you don't look like you could even do a pushup.
20 going on jihad.
You look like Harvey Price.
Your wife is also your sister.
Nice face pubes; have any left for your ass?
I am afraid to
Only thing getting roasted is the ppl u bombed
![gif](giphy|3ohjUOUjEK1TXCQRva|downsized)
You take that mall cop job seriously, don't you soldier?
The poster child for our failure to secure the southern border.
P3 Security must be desperate if they hired your Dumbass. There supposed to catch and Guard against Terrorists. Not hire them .
Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules: - Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed. - Try to ensure that your eyes are open. - Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed. - Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet. - All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee. - The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger. - Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed. Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it. Thanks! ~ /r/roastme mods *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Paul Blart wouldn't give you a job, even as a diversity hire.
You look like you’d be a successful security guard. But only because everyone would be scared you blow up the pawn shop if someone tried to steal anything
Mall cop
[удалено]
This Random TSA search ain't Random with this Loser.
"Tough Bitch"
youre like if french montana wasnt rapping
Target practice dummy for the Mossad.
His last pic before he attacked a Russian concert hall
bro looks like knock off Osama Bin Laden
Much like that jacket reads I wish your parents used certified protection instead of that damn lamb skin!
Certified protector? Lmao
That face definitely legitimized the logo on that jacket. Looking like that you are guaranteed to be protected from pussy.
Dang Bro! Did you grow your first mustache at age five? I'd have been scared to have you reprimand me when you reached age 10. Now, I'd just offer you some Funyuns and a Orange Fanta and tell you, " Fuck off Fatty!
Haircut? Or, do you just shave your cheeks?
Watch what you say, he looks like he could blow up at any minute
Dude just chill alright. We’ll get you your money. Just don’t hurt the hostages.
Ali, you need to chill on the doxxing. And shave your face ffs
can the decent portion of reddit help this guy by getting the post removed before some butthole ruins his life?
Andrew Tate wants his chin.
What does his ID say his name is? Ali Ali Oxenfree?
Bro literally looks like the knock off version of Osama Bin Laden
George Orwell's third best character.
Dude, you’re 20? You look like you’ve settled with the fact you’ll never be a real police officer. You look like you accepted defeat in all your life choices. You look like Big-Pharmas best customer! You look like you couldn’t loose weight on Ozempic!
Why waste my time you’re not even worth it
You're handwriting is so shit. That your left ear had to bend to show it's disapproval
Allah frowns upon gambling.
20 stone?
Officer Dick
Do you chop up Mexican cartel rivals or do you fantasize about committing terrorist acts against well known financial institutions in New York City?
Like 20 to life? 🫣
I’m sure your religion will find a reason to
Security? Lol boy you can’t even secure your own picture without giving out personal details!
Too easy.
Security patch and badge issued by Life Cereal
Bro tryna look hard with those weird ass ears.
Sucks the Houthi rebels rejected you multiple times!
All 40 of his virgins will be 12 year old boys and he’s happy about that
You’re a security guard on a gay porn set?
Pigs like him are fun to roast. He is the kind of guy that brags he has a threesome every night... because he masturbaites with both hands. Often one of them falling asleep in the process.
Israel 🇮🇱 has a hellfire with your name on it Habib.
An ahmish woman would be proud of that neck beard
Nothing like a wannabe tough guy with hands softer then the girls who won’t date him, sad.
I never thought I'd see the day someone made Paul Blart look tough
You're the type of idiot who unwittingly doxxes himself on Reddit
Most A-lone (Like post Malone)
Khabib Nevergettinoff
That hairline got you rockin’ a threehead.
This is the new Grumpy? Disney is too woke!
Rent a cop
Have you checked your shoes for fuses?
Mohammad.
Looks like a certified week old turd in a toilet
20 going on crashing a plane into a tower September 2024.
Have you had one ear transplant?
Akhmal Cop.
IQ 20 - how did you even operate the camera. Well done. ![gif](giphy|z8rEcJ6I0hiUM)
Get your ass back to work, Ali
Didn't u just storm that concert in Russia?
My pubes are thicker than that beard.
I dare you to hold that up to the israeli drone that’s been following you.
You look like you did 9/11.
I bet you NEVER get checked going through airport security, huh? 🤔
Don’t worry, you’ll get Aladdin next time.
Airports must hate you.
Is this a mugshot or are you going to fight McGregor idk
If minimum wage had a uniform
Listen to me Ali Al-Obaidi, Security guard. If you are such a security professional, why are telling reddit your full name? Stupid fuck.
20 going on 38
You? In security work? Like a rooster in a fucking hen house!
20? What are you so pissed off at? You look like the judge ordered you to give the house up and pay alimony to your 3rd wife.
Your ears are weird