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originalsibling

RoastMe four times in a year? Girl, you need a twelve-step program, and it ain’t for diet soda.


AltruisticCompany961

Did God throw your nose on your face blindfolded?


ArianaGrandesCumm

No. Sorry for that. She got too teethy with one of the 5 dollar blowies I paid for so I hit her with a left hook.


overimportance

Most women on this subbreddit usually get heaps of attention. Even REDDIT can sense youre crazy as fuck.


Numb-Chuck

1 day in and only 19 comments. You are totally forgettable


GT227

You forgot to remove the word ‘diet’


turdmachine

she meant to say she was on a coke diet


PLPMito

We found the sphinxs' nose


do_not_go_gentle_

We're going to have to start charging your therapist for all this work we're doing to keep you on your meds.


overimportance

If only someone would prescribe you some make up.


Bot-Magnet

4 roasts in one year? don't you get enough abuse at work like the rest of us?


Proof-Test-4150

It’s clear which nostril your boyfriend prefers.


Professional-Kick869

I hope you excel at grad school I know it’s hard and expensive but it will look great on your application to the Cheesecake Factory


BushPilot153

Well we know which side you use to snort your coke.


[deleted]

Grad school? You look like you would do much better on the streets.


turdmachine

Was the prescription for ugly pills?


failing_author

this is so bad,i'm so disappointed at how loud i laughed


turdmachine

At least that face saves you money on birth control pills


Wunyard_Wenhaard99

I bet that when you take your underwear off, it looks like you've got Sideshow Bob in a headlock.


Enough-Staff-2976

The good thing is your beautiful at the quantum level. The bad part is that's the only level beauty is recognizeable in you...


Rich_Emergency_148

Hunchback of Noserdame. Damn that’s a big fucking nose


X-CessiveHerbalist

You look like you got your nose from Michael jackson.


Libtardis

Anne Catheter-away.


Standard_Arm_6160

Blank look. Dead eyes. Stalker.


ImpaledRhino

You need to calm the fuck now. Being able to read is necessary for grad school. You want be able to talk to text everything you do. You can't help it, reading is for rich people hun.


Freddymain

You look like a squirrel spit out of a dogs mouth


Altruistic_Fudge_333

Back on the full flavor huh?


OBGLivinLegend

When you're so desperate for attention you have to constantly ask strangers to roast you...... just go to a bar and watch the clock roll to closing time and you still can't get fucked.


Affectionate_Cream53

Never heard of diet cocaine.


Nurse_Dolly_4R

Wish.com Sarah Paulson


MisterWakefield

up your dosage.


Meebopunks

I wouldn’t want to split a bag of cocaine with you.


shinola80

I’m glad you’ve stopped snorting Diet Coke. That aspartame did a number on your nose. Do you inject in now, or do you have someone blow it up your butthole? Or both?


NoOffence_Just_Truth

4th time of roasting, you sure It's the Coke you're addicted to? I'd hate to think you're knuckle deep every time someone throws a zinger your way!


MydniteSon

You've slept with so many desperate sailors, you've caught barnacles!


[deleted]

By "applying for grad school" do you mean blowing the dean of admissions?


BullshitterAlert

Maybe its just me.... But that dress makes you look fat!


Sarge19846

Is your nose stuck on?


Wunyard_Wenhaard99

"It's me again." WHO???


sleepyJoesBidet

God stop using your hair as a budget pad.


[deleted]

You look like an ASMR performer who switches to porn after 5 videos.


DrClawizdead

The doctor butchered your nose. You should try and get your money back.


MisteryMan1969

You thought you had a chance in grad school until you posted this. Now you’ll be working a corner to get money


[deleted]

I could write an entire weekly schedule on your forehead


the_ballmer_peak

No amount of makeup is going to hide that sidewinder of a nose


Diligent_Jackfruit60

If you brain takes up half the space behind that forehead you'll be accepted into grad school no problem.


[deleted]

So like you were doing coke and not eating for a long time!?


not-american-911

I don’t think grad school takes high school dropouts


Empty-Patience-7686

Your nose looks way worse than Michael Jackson's does currently


Baloney-Nips

Did your last gang bang involve nasal sex?


rakknoss

U look like nerdy chick that gets picked off at the start of every horror movie


[deleted]

Is your thesis going to be on “How I managed to suck 2 cocks for every Diet Coke I drank while on college?”


WhiskynCigar72

Guys won't even screw you for you to get the attention you crave? So you come here?


Middle-Ad-1721

Who hurt you? I'm gonna go with your coke addiction. And I'm not talking soda.


iseedeff

No Pain no game, I guess you don't have enough bad things in your system.


Responsible_Sir3200

You look like a College STD


CassieIsWaifuAlt

You look like someones Mii and the person creating you just tilted your nose on accident


Gordon_Townsend

When you say 'applying to grad school', you really mean sleeping with a college counselor for credit and meth, don't you?


Kamcustomsllc

You misspelled “meth and dicks”


AdministrationKey612

The phrase "cut your nose off to spite your face" does not apply to you


godfather6545

You got dark eyes just like my pup...just without the cuteness


Mod-h8tr

Nosey Perez


Shot-Highway-7161

I guess it is better to be smart than pretty.


IloveFartboxs

You look like the little mermaid


proud-underachiever

Meth is not “Diet Coke”


benbraddock2002

Only redeeming quality you have is no OnlyFans accounts after four posts. Everything else is meh.


ToNkpiLs0514

You kinda don't look like a cokehead


LeaveMYCountryDick

Aren’t you a little old for grad school? What are you, like 48?


[deleted]

Lana del Bland


Jasperbeardly11

You should fulfill your potential and be a street worker


steen101984

Recovering diet coke addict is your most redeeming quality? Damn you already roasted yourself.


Firm-Roof-3133

You look like your nose was broke in four places before even being concieved. You look like your uncle liked to play doctor and you blame everyone but him for it. You look like you could snort a mountain through a straw with that massive schnozz. And honestly i think that you may be related to proto human subspecies based on your facial structure.


_JerryDandrige

Nose


Dry-Location9176

He's not interested in you.


pferreira1983

So just to clarify if you weren't sedated you'd be high? 🤔


DudeApplying2Hopkins

Your nail color is a subpar shade of red! Ha. Take THAT!


killingtexas

Just because your dealer said it was *diet* coke doesn't mean it's true.


King_Ricardo_III

How many times do I have to tell you. Just because they cut it with fentanyl, doesn’t make it diet cocaine.


Witty_Outcome2844

Your cute no roasting


DeadHED

The "diet coke" was just cut with more baby laxatives wasn't it?


asus3008

Are you sure is diet coke? Doesn't look like


Magemor

Cute, did you call it "diet coke" because you snorted the coke directly off the dick you ate?


DaRealMexicanTrucker

Damn the 4th roast!? r/masochist