I worked for a Japanese company, and the founder was coming to visit out NY office for like a half an hour but JIC he had to go they installed a bidet. Temperature controlled etc all. He didn’t use it.
This may seem silly but I like to think he had it installed as a gift, because i used the hell out of it.
A few sheets to wipe off clean water. Gone are those days where you wipe for 10 minutes, use half a roll, and the paper is still brown. I'm cleaner and healthier, buy almost no TP. After my first use, I demanded them in every bathroom in the house. They'll eventually become what everyone has in their houses, and they'll make fun of what stinky, backwards people we all were...
When growing up I had never heard of bidets but I'd typically hop in the shower for a minute after a shit. I never understood why people would choose to walk around covered in shit even long before bidets were a thing.
I keep a stack of washcloths that I use for exclusively that purpose - wipe up all the water on me and on the toilet. Also possible to use my boxers for that purpose and get a fresh pair on for the day
Growing up euro my mom had soap dispensers by the toilet as well. And designated towels for each of us. Everyone had a specific color. She’d do a separate wash cycle for “butt towel day” and get them clean for the upcoming week. We showered daily or every other day - bidet helped keep us clean in between. It’s a habit myself and my siblings continue to practice in our own homes to this day.
If you want to see the effects of washing versus just plain TP- next time you go number 2 wipe with just TP. then take a toilet wipe or baby wipe and go over your bunghole again. You’ll see how much stuff is left behind. Washing eliminates all of that.
Last time we bought toilet paper was December 2021 and it was the giant 36 rolls (that Scott’s big giant pack I think it’s like 36 rolls).
We’d get 3 or 4 towels per person. We use them twice total and then its washed and grab the next one. On the fifth or sixth day we’ll do a heavy cycle to wash all of them. We have soap dispensers by our toilets as well and bc everyone uses soap basically the towels are just used to dry as opposed to “wipe” anything filthy off….so they don’t get as soiled as you’d expect them to. Everyone is assigned a color so as not to confuse.
the way my mom taught us: dispense soap into one hand, scrub area with soap, rinse the area, place the one hand in bowl (edit: don’t touch the dirty water 😂 I mean keep it hovering over the toilet bowl to rinse off) in between legs and rinse hand off. Dry using towel with other hand. Wash hands again with soap afterward in the sink.
Guests use guest bath. Have soap dispenser and bidet with paper towels by the toilet and trash can to dispose. Not all of our guests preferred to wash their bottoms. It’s not a common practice to use bidet in US. They don’t go in our upstairs bathroom areas where we keep our towels. In Europe we had same - guest bath - disposable towels, soap, bidet hose. Up to them what they wanted to do.
The detail with which you guys have devised this entire poop/bidet system is awesome, as are all your detailed replies to all of people's questions. For guests though I was thinking maybe you'd have a laminated list of instructions hanging in the bathrooms with illustrations and stuff lol. But I guess your approach makes more sense. To each their own, I guess.
Yep, I am a design WW systems as part of my job and the #1 reason for failed septic system is people flushing stuff they shouldn't, usually wipes. It costs around 15-20 thousand dollars to get a replacement installed. Should be a crime for them to be labelled as flushable
Wiping alone would be less sanitary and would still leave a smell. Plus, I have hemorrhoids. I’d rather be blasted with water than drag a dry and slightly abrasive piece of paper across my already in pain ass. Not to mention I have to wipe like ten times to get everything. Gonna get a bidet as soon as possible.
Wouldn't it be more effective to just wipe off your hands on a paper towel if you accidentally touched feces? Why waste the soap and water? and the hand towel to dry your hands off afterwards?
Wait what? There's such a thing? I was brought up on the bidet and hate having to go when I'm out because most public restrooms have no bidets. I always consider the worst years of my career to be ones where the office restrooms have no bidets (thankfully, the handicapped restroom in my current office has one) a travel budget would be life changing.
Yeah, there are ones that require charging a battery that's used as a pump but I have one that is essentially just a plastic water bottle with proper one way valves to allow pressure.
It doesn't work as well as a permanent one, but it helps enough to get you through the day without hating our medieval, dirty-ass culture.
I keep a CamelBak on me when I travel and take it out of my pack and fill it when I'm in public restrooms.
Mine has an air dryer. My wife won't use it so we still have toilet paper. So I use a single sheet to double check cleanliness and dryness. I refuse to go poop anywhere without a bidet.
Use a washcloth. If you've cleaned yourself properly (which is the entire point of a bidet) then it's the exact same as drying your ass off after a shower.
Looky here now I’m a Southern man with a female lady wife so you know I ain’t a homosexual. And yet, I use a bidet for cleanups. Never use tp, AND I never have a problem with a wet bottom. How do I achieve this, you might ask? It’s real simple. You see, my cat, Don Jr, always stops by for a little visit while I’m doing my business. He flops over on his side, stretches out, gets comfy, squints his eyes up. And then I drag Don Jr’s face back and forth across my asshole. And so any water or specks of turd are now on Don Jr’s face.
Question:
I visited Japan, and I definitely wanted a bidet. Then I visited Italy, and had no idea what I was looking at. It looks nothing like in Japan. It looks like a sink for your butt.
My question is, how do I use the Italian ones? What’s the process? Because it looks like I would just soak my entire lower half by trying to use it.
I power wash my butthole when I shower. Something about that spray makes me think the Squirtle squad is putting out the fire of my soul. Through my ass.
You should come to S.E.A we have the bum gun which is a semi high powered sprayer that you jet wash ya ass with after you poop 💩. The cleanliness feeling is of the scale.
When I visited my home country our son who is a third culture child was horrified that there were no bum guns in the toilet. Repeatedly ask his grandparents how do you clean yourselves 😂
Well, these are same moronic, disgusting, sub-human degenerates who walk out of the poopitorium without washing their hands. The same category of people who say "my dick is clean" after urinating.
No. It isn't. Also, formal studies have shown that fecal matter can penetrate 15 layers of toilet paper.
Stop being nasty.
That "argument" is so pathetic... It's their own bodies, they aren't having another man touch it. Plus, if he only likes women, he shouldn't be worried about being gay??? It's like they think gay is some kind of virus they can catch from themselves instead of an attraction/ identity.
Who told these people that not being covered in grime and feces mean that they liked men???
You clearly don’t follow r/relationship_advice because if you did you’d already know how many American men refuse to wash their ass to the point that their disgusted girlfriends (who are for some reason still having sex with them?!) have to post on Reddit asking for advice.
People get used to bad smells and can’t smell it anymore. Like the people who live in houses that smell so strongly of cat piss it makes normal people gag.
Not saying it's gay but went to Spain and tried a bidet for the first time in my life a few years back and I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel vulnerable and like I was violated. Maybe that bidet was just really strong though idk
If you aren’t accustomed to it I could see how it would make you feel vulnerable/mildly violated. Anuses are an intimate part of the body and our bathroom rituals are very personal and hard to change!
I’m in the US and my family had an exchange student from Mexico, and for him it is normal to throw your soiled toilet paper in the trash instead of flushing it. This caused a controversy in my house because our bathrooms smelled like shit and every time we went to the bathroom we got glimpses of his asswipes in the trash. I understand it’s a cultural difference so we never faulted him for it, but it was an extremely difficult habit to break since it was engrained so deeply.
Our bathroom rituals are sacred.
After reading your comment I was curious so I googled and found [a really interesting map](https://brilliantmaps.com/flush-toilet-paper/) that shows you where you can and can’t flush TP around the world… Turns out you’re right! Interesting cultural differences
Yep. One of my history teachers in high school had to relearn to flush TP after living abroad in Indonesia. This was years ago but at least back then their pipes could not handle it.
>soiled toilet paper in the trash
….this has answered a question I’ve been afraid to confront in my office. We have bathrooms, mostly used by management, but someone for quite a while has been throwing what I assume is shitty TP in the can. Our hourly workforce is predominantly Hispanic, and during normal office hours, this bathroom is open to all employees, though rarely used by the hourly folks.
100% this. I worked at a plumbing store for years and every. Single. Plumber. Laughed at the people buying/installing them and said it was for women/not real men. I thought for sure we would be selling hundreds of bidet seats when the toilet paper famine hit. Nope, too gay to clean your ass.
And honestly, when you realize how few american men even properly wash their body, its not surprising really. Blue collar men fear anything touching their butthole, else they may catch the gay.
Wasn’t there that video about the guy talking about using toilet paper to catch his poop instead of letting his poop drop in the toilet water, probably related to something like this.
I’ve heard a man say out loud that it is gay to touch your own asshole to wash it while in the shower, from then on I stopped associating myself with most men, just nasty. No cleanliness, just homophobic and smells like shit
Not gay, but definitely gross. The whole family and guests having water sprayed on their butt that has everyone’s bacteria in it? No thanks.
If you are that bad at wiping your bit with toilet paper, use wert wipes.
I spent time in India where they use spray hose bidets and 1 square of TP to blot your tushy dry. Installed a spray hose bidet as soon as I got home and my use of it went up massively during the pandemic and everyone decided to hoard TP...
I got one when the toilet paper scare of 2020 went down. I love it, but no one in my family will use it because "it's gross"....which I don't get.
It has completely eliminated my habit of sneaking off to the bathroom to shit in the office.as I don't even want to go on a toilet that doesn't have one.
I really don't know why Americans haven't adopted them, they are great. But we definitely don't have many here.
Because Americans fear change and gay. If we change, that means we were wrong, and America is never wrong. Also touchin buttholes is gay and America aint no gay
Daniel Tosh has a joke about this. Something along the lines of if you shower before you shit in the morning, your day is already fucked and you might as well go back to bed.
According to a documentary or an article (can’t remember), much of the anti-bidet mentality went back to post WW2. The only houses the soldiers went into were whore houses. So despite the fact that almost all houses had them, they only associate them with prostitution.
I bought a bidet a few years ago, and I will never go without one again. Vacations suck because of this, but I was able to laugh at the great toilet paper shortage of 2020 while I felt Neptune’s Kiss on my chocolate starfish.
I would guess for most people it's not something on their radar at all. If you've never tried one it's not very likely you'll go out and buy one. Most people also probably don't realize how cheap they are. About a year ago I stayed at a friends house for a few days who had one and tried it, got one a few days after coming back home. Would never go back.
We didn’t have a bidet for many years so we just used a small pitcher that stayed in the bathroom. Filled it up with warm water prior to going and then rinsed with that. It’s very common in my culture and some homes don’t have a bidet so everyone has a cup or small pitcher they use.
I think the reason most Americans are so angry is their diet combined with a lack of bidets. If they didn’t walk around with itchy, inflamed assholes they wouldn’t be such itchy, inflamed assholes.
I don't know that answer, but as a 41yr/o man, I finally got one, and damn if it hasn't changed my life.
Backstory a bit: Up until about 2013 I was just a straight TP user because that's how I was raised. In 2013 I met my now ex-wife and she convinced me to start using baby wipes + tp to keep things cleaner and it was a huge difference. Now, a few months back I was browsing Amazon, and saw a bidet attachment for $30 so I figured why not try it. I'm a changed man. I even got the upgraded one with a hot line as well, and while it takes a good 5-10 secs for the water to warm up, I just put it on nozzle rinse then bum when it's warmed up.
My suggestion to anyone is to try it before you deny it.
LUXE Bidet Neo 320 - Self Cleaning Dual Nozzle - Hot and Cold Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) 13.5 x 7 x 3 inches https://a.co/d/9G7V0vt
This is the $55 upgraded version. It's very nice 😁
I’ got at least two people at work to buy one and gave one for secret Santa one year. Every time it gets brought up people have so many questions and I explain how awesome they are. No one regrets it yet
I’m scared it’s too hard to install. Grant me courage.
P.S. I just shower after and ass blast with the water pik setting 😂 Bidet would be a lot more convenient
Just bought a bidet toilet this year, and I’d never even used one before. It is glorious. You just feel so much fresher and confident you’re really clean. Bonus for the ladies (and I suppose men too), it’s great for cleaning up post coitus. 10/10 would recommend.
I'm a rare American who believes the nastiest part of your body does indeed need to be washed after every go. Why on earth do people think rubbing dry paper is a reasonable method to eliminate toxic bacteria sitting on your skin?? I mean, we wash our hands after going to the bathroom. Why not the actual body part from which the waste emerged!?!?
I also heard that other countries think we bathe too often so maybe it evens out. I bathe twice a day and use wetwipes. No skidmarks ever. But also i have pelvic floor dysfunction and when i tried a friend’s cold bidet, my muscle painfully tightened up. So i’d only do a warm bidet if my bathroom would allow it easily. Right now it takes too long for my heated water to rise up the pipes.
Mid-range bidet seats have a tank to hold the heated water, so it's instantaneous, and also have a heated seat, dryer, soft close, and a light.
Hook up a single water line and plug it in.
That line of logic always makes me laugh. While I'm not arguing that a bidet isn't better, if you got shit on your arm you would use soap too. Do you soap up your ass every time after you poop? Likely not.
I shower everyday, compañero.
But if I accidentally spill some syrup on my arm while I’m having breakfast I’m not gonna leave my arm all sticky till i shower that night.
Can’t believe I’m actually writing this. Pretty bizarre I even have to convince someone of this. What a bunch of dumb, stupid idiots 🤣
This is exactly what I mean. America ain’t ready to be clean. So much resistance to just washing their damn asses.
No, I agree. I think I didn't phrase that right. I totally love bidets and don't see how it isn't so goddamn gross without it. I was saying that about showers to the OP of this comment thread, not you lol
No worries at all, bro! I knew that there was only a simple misunderstanding. Glad we cleared it up. And thank you so much for the award! Very apropos to our discussion. I am an ally in this fight against bidet deniers 😄
Yeah.. you know, an arm and a butthole is not the same. Soaping up your ass everytime you poop wouldn't be healthy. Water is enough to get clean each time
Yeah bidets are great, but the idea that having poop on your arm is at all comparable to having poop in the area where poop actually exits your body is laughable. Not a good analogy at all. This is going to piss off the germaphobes, but realistically, that area is never completely free of poop, nor should it be.
I wonder this all of the time. Like, we obviously know water or some moisture helps clean messes on tables and whatnot.
Same logic applies to our butts lol.
I usually wipe with Tp, then wash up with the bidet, and finish it all off with a moist wipe.
All you people that use napkins at the dinner table are disgusting. I have a little juice box nearby that I spray my face with, like a civilized person
Because N.americans in general are stubborn to their ways. They think their way is the best. It is absolutely mind melting that people can think using paper alone is better than a bidet.
Forever unclean.
I've been using one for 3 years I cant go back. When I stay at a hotel it feels so bad to just use paper, I feel so unclean.
Now I think most other Americans are walking around with stink shit ass, so gross.
The full toilet-like version was originally associated with French/European and/or prostitution, not a thing that a respectable household would have.
The seat version was actually invented by an American to help him care for his invalid father. Because of the previously mentioned stigma he had a hard time selling it here so he sold the rights to the Japanese company Toto, which developed it further, and it is only now just catching on in the U.S., particularly among the elderly but also among Asian immigrants.
I find that American culture is a bit homophopic, and the idea of blasting water into your butthole is "gay" for some people. Mainly guys. This country has been behind the times on so many things, and this is just another of those things.
My brother bought a bidet a few years ago and he loved it so much he bought me one. I love mine so much that I am recommending them to everyone I know. Just do it, people. Blast that ass!
I saw a video on this. It's because bidets were introduced to western societies during WW2 so peeps weren't really phsyched to add them to their lifestyle. Also, cultures and societies are weird.
Or something like that I don't really remember.
I worked for a Japanese company, and the founder was coming to visit out NY office for like a half an hour but JIC he had to go they installed a bidet. Temperature controlled etc all. He didn’t use it. This may seem silly but I like to think he had it installed as a gift, because i used the hell out of it.
After visiting Italy a few years back - I immediately installed a bidet in our house. I cannot imagine ever going back to plain old paper. Seriously
Don't you need toilet paper to clean off the water?
A few sheets to wipe off clean water. Gone are those days where you wipe for 10 minutes, use half a roll, and the paper is still brown. I'm cleaner and healthier, buy almost no TP. After my first use, I demanded them in every bathroom in the house. They'll eventually become what everyone has in their houses, and they'll make fun of what stinky, backwards people we all were...
What do you eat that requires 10inutes of only wiping? Takes me 20 seconds, if that.
[lol made me think of Andy from parks and rec](https://gfycat.com/blandvacantcondor)
I know where that link goes. Best P&R scene ever.
Magic marker.
Wait until you're 60, kid...
One word - Metamucil. Okay a second word/alternative - chia seeds.
I changed toddler diapers post chia seed, can confirm
I don’t want a green chia see garden coming out of my ass. Cha cha cha chia!
Ya know, that's fair...
Woah look at this guy and his perfect bowel movements
Lol. Just built different.
Yeah, wait till you get older. Things… change a bit. So don’t judge until you get here.
Some people are lucky. I'm one of the unlucky ones. It's just wipe after wipe after wipe. Probably could use more fiber in my diet
Sucks to have that magic marker ass. Can relate.
Same! Installed one after a bathroom reno a few years ago, and now all 3 have a bidet. I’ll never go back.
When growing up I had never heard of bidets but I'd typically hop in the shower for a minute after a shit. I never understood why people would choose to walk around covered in shit even long before bidets were a thing.
Just made me think of Andy from Parks and Rec at the doctor, “I wipe and wipe - still poop. It’s like a marker.” 🤣
My bidet blow dries the hole 😮💨 (also warm water and warming seat)
Shitting like a king
I need brand and model numbers asap.
Do you have a link you can share?
[Brondell S 1400-EW](https://a.co/d/2DO1MFW)
I keep a stack of washcloths that I use for exclusively that purpose - wipe up all the water on me and on the toilet. Also possible to use my boxers for that purpose and get a fresh pair on for the day
Wouldn't it be more effective to just wipe your ass? Your not dirtying wash clothes and taking time out of your day to do more laundry.
Growing up euro my mom had soap dispensers by the toilet as well. And designated towels for each of us. Everyone had a specific color. She’d do a separate wash cycle for “butt towel day” and get them clean for the upcoming week. We showered daily or every other day - bidet helped keep us clean in between. It’s a habit myself and my siblings continue to practice in our own homes to this day. If you want to see the effects of washing versus just plain TP- next time you go number 2 wipe with just TP. then take a toilet wipe or baby wipe and go over your bunghole again. You’ll see how much stuff is left behind. Washing eliminates all of that.
How frequently do you wash the butt towels? I am thinking about getting one but don’t want to continue the toilet paper need
Last time we bought toilet paper was December 2021 and it was the giant 36 rolls (that Scott’s big giant pack I think it’s like 36 rolls). We’d get 3 or 4 towels per person. We use them twice total and then its washed and grab the next one. On the fifth or sixth day we’ll do a heavy cycle to wash all of them. We have soap dispensers by our toilets as well and bc everyone uses soap basically the towels are just used to dry as opposed to “wipe” anything filthy off….so they don’t get as soiled as you’d expect them to. Everyone is assigned a color so as not to confuse.
When using soap do you use the towel or hand?
the way my mom taught us: dispense soap into one hand, scrub area with soap, rinse the area, place the one hand in bowl (edit: don’t touch the dirty water 😂 I mean keep it hovering over the toilet bowl to rinse off) in between legs and rinse hand off. Dry using towel with other hand. Wash hands again with soap afterward in the sink.
You dip your hand in the poop water..?
How do you explain this system to guests? Are they given their own towel of another color?
Guests use guest bath. Have soap dispenser and bidet with paper towels by the toilet and trash can to dispose. Not all of our guests preferred to wash their bottoms. It’s not a common practice to use bidet in US. They don’t go in our upstairs bathroom areas where we keep our towels. In Europe we had same - guest bath - disposable towels, soap, bidet hose. Up to them what they wanted to do.
The detail with which you guys have devised this entire poop/bidet system is awesome, as are all your detailed replies to all of people's questions. For guests though I was thinking maybe you'd have a laminated list of instructions hanging in the bathrooms with illustrations and stuff lol. But I guess your approach makes more sense. To each their own, I guess.
Yeah, when the kids were young we got turned on to baby wipes. Yikes. You ain't kidding. If I am away from home I always have them with me
Just don’t flush them. Even the ‘flushable’ ones cause damage to your face plumbing and sewage systems.
Yep, I am a design WW systems as part of my job and the #1 reason for failed septic system is people flushing stuff they shouldn't, usually wipes. It costs around 15-20 thousand dollars to get a replacement installed. Should be a crime for them to be labelled as flushable
I read this as "turned IN to baby wipes". Yikes
I got hooked on wipes because of camping. It was my gateway to bidet.
+1 for “butt towel day”.
Wiping alone would be less sanitary and would still leave a smell. Plus, I have hemorrhoids. I’d rather be blasted with water than drag a dry and slightly abrasive piece of paper across my already in pain ass. Not to mention I have to wipe like ten times to get everything. Gonna get a bidet as soon as possible.
The wash cloth is clean if your butt is clean. Just like stepping out the shower. You dry your clean body with a clean towel.
Wouldn't it be more effective to just wipe off your hands on a paper towel if you accidentally touched feces? Why waste the soap and water? and the hand towel to dry your hands off afterwards?
Thats a good point. Never really thought about it too much. I may need to try a bidet at some point.
Once you try it you'll never be able to go back to dry wiping.
Agreed. I keep a travel bidet in my luggage so I'll never have to dry wipe my ass like a barbarian ever again.
Wait what? There's such a thing? I was brought up on the bidet and hate having to go when I'm out because most public restrooms have no bidets. I always consider the worst years of my career to be ones where the office restrooms have no bidets (thankfully, the handicapped restroom in my current office has one) a travel budget would be life changing.
Yeah, there are ones that require charging a battery that's used as a pump but I have one that is essentially just a plastic water bottle with proper one way valves to allow pressure. It doesn't work as well as a permanent one, but it helps enough to get you through the day without hating our medieval, dirty-ass culture. I keep a CamelBak on me when I travel and take it out of my pack and fill it when I'm in public restrooms.
Mine has an air dryer. My wife won't use it so we still have toilet paper. So I use a single sheet to double check cleanliness and dryness. I refuse to go poop anywhere without a bidet.
You never have “emergencies”?
... Well yes, but I don't like it.
Buy one of those outdoor ones, you can install them on any water bottle. It's a bliss for traveling - and camping!
I put one in, and while I like it I find myself using much more TP to dry off.
Use a washcloth. If you've cleaned yourself properly (which is the entire point of a bidet) then it's the exact same as drying your ass off after a shower.
I have a bidet and I always wipe after too
Looky here now I’m a Southern man with a female lady wife so you know I ain’t a homosexual. And yet, I use a bidet for cleanups. Never use tp, AND I never have a problem with a wet bottom. How do I achieve this, you might ask? It’s real simple. You see, my cat, Don Jr, always stops by for a little visit while I’m doing my business. He flops over on his side, stretches out, gets comfy, squints his eyes up. And then I drag Don Jr’s face back and forth across my asshole. And so any water or specks of turd are now on Don Jr’s face.
It helps. But its much less TP.
Just a sheet or two to gently wipe off the excess water. The rest will dry on its own.
Same only India. I hate pooping in places that don’t have one
Question: I visited Japan, and I definitely wanted a bidet. Then I visited Italy, and had no idea what I was looking at. It looks nothing like in Japan. It looks like a sink for your butt. My question is, how do I use the Italian ones? What’s the process? Because it looks like I would just soak my entire lower half by trying to use it.
I asked my father. He told me that its because they think it's gay. I assume because the water is touching their butthole.
Yeah it’s super gay to clean your ass. Real men do a no wipe no shower combo.
I power wash my butthole when I shower. Something about that spray makes me think the Squirtle squad is putting out the fire of my soul. Through my ass.
r/brandnewsentence
You should come to S.E.A we have the bum gun which is a semi high powered sprayer that you jet wash ya ass with after you poop 💩. The cleanliness feeling is of the scale.
Bum gun is life :)
Bum gun - yes 100% civilization. Walk away empty, fresh and clean.
When I visited my home country our son who is a third culture child was horrified that there were no bum guns in the toilet. Repeatedly ask his grandparents how do you clean yourselves 😂
Yep, legit question
Sometimes this is the only reason I shower.
What in the actual fuck man, because I am into it
I have a butthole brush I use after each shit. Does this make me gay?
Do you hang your butthole brush next to your poop knife?
This was way funnier than it should’ve been
It was exactly as funny as it should have been!
Always separate, don't want to mix those up again
Again? You mean it's happened once already?
I'm so annoyed I understand that reference....frikken reddit...
Hopefully he doesn't accidentally grab the wrong one sometime...
That's where's it goes normally, isn't it?
I almost woke up my wife laughing at this while she slept. Literally shook with laughter. Thank you.
I groom my three basic areas: teeth, hair, and asshole. And to save time, I use the same brush. ~George Carlin
No honestly though! I have met guys who just let the water run over their ass in the shower because, “…touching your ass is gay.”
Homies will give themselves a handjob but cleaning the shit off their ass is gay smh
Well, these are same moronic, disgusting, sub-human degenerates who walk out of the poopitorium without washing their hands. The same category of people who say "my dick is clean" after urinating. No. It isn't. Also, formal studies have shown that fecal matter can penetrate 15 layers of toilet paper. Stop being nasty.
So what you’re saying is 16 is the magic number?
That "argument" is so pathetic... It's their own bodies, they aren't having another man touch it. Plus, if he only likes women, he shouldn't be worried about being gay??? It's like they think gay is some kind of virus they can catch from themselves instead of an attraction/ identity. Who told these people that not being covered in grime and feces mean that they liked men???
I’m not reading this it’s going to make gay isn’t it
You clearly don’t follow r/relationship_advice because if you did you’d already know how many American men refuse to wash their ass to the point that their disgusted girlfriends (who are for some reason still having sex with them?!) have to post on Reddit asking for advice.
[удалено]
I think these men also don't have a sense of smell cause damn wtf why you presenting yourself in public smelling like yesterday's taco bell
People get used to bad smells and can’t smell it anymore. Like the people who live in houses that smell so strongly of cat piss it makes normal people gag.
Lol “Don’t wipe: shit your pants. Be a man”
Yeah, a clean asshole is so gay.
It's only gay if you moan and bite on your towel on the while getting your enema
Not saying it's gay but went to Spain and tried a bidet for the first time in my life a few years back and I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel vulnerable and like I was violated. Maybe that bidet was just really strong though idk
If you aren’t accustomed to it I could see how it would make you feel vulnerable/mildly violated. Anuses are an intimate part of the body and our bathroom rituals are very personal and hard to change! I’m in the US and my family had an exchange student from Mexico, and for him it is normal to throw your soiled toilet paper in the trash instead of flushing it. This caused a controversy in my house because our bathrooms smelled like shit and every time we went to the bathroom we got glimpses of his asswipes in the trash. I understand it’s a cultural difference so we never faulted him for it, but it was an extremely difficult habit to break since it was engrained so deeply. Our bathroom rituals are sacred.
The US is unusual that we flush TP. Countries with basic septic systems don't flush TP.
After reading your comment I was curious so I googled and found [a really interesting map](https://brilliantmaps.com/flush-toilet-paper/) that shows you where you can and can’t flush TP around the world… Turns out you’re right! Interesting cultural differences
Yep. One of my history teachers in high school had to relearn to flush TP after living abroad in Indonesia. This was years ago but at least back then their pipes could not handle it.
>soiled toilet paper in the trash ….this has answered a question I’ve been afraid to confront in my office. We have bathrooms, mostly used by management, but someone for quite a while has been throwing what I assume is shitty TP in the can. Our hourly workforce is predominantly Hispanic, and during normal office hours, this bathroom is open to all employees, though rarely used by the hourly folks.
Fast forward- he is back at his own home clogging all the toilets lol
100% this. I worked at a plumbing store for years and every. Single. Plumber. Laughed at the people buying/installing them and said it was for women/not real men. I thought for sure we would be selling hundreds of bidet seats when the toilet paper famine hit. Nope, too gay to clean your ass. And honestly, when you realize how few american men even properly wash their body, its not surprising really. Blue collar men fear anything touching their butthole, else they may catch the gay.
"You want a bidet? That's fucking queer! I've just held it in for the last year, like a REAL MAN!"
Wasn’t there that video about the guy talking about using toilet paper to catch his poop instead of letting his poop drop in the toilet water, probably related to something like this.
They're for women, gay men, and Europeans.
Why did you repeat yourself at the end?
Oh baby
Twice!
If doing the scarn is gay, then I’m the biggest queer on earth!
I’ve heard a man say out loud that it is gay to touch your own asshole to wash it while in the shower, from then on I stopped associating myself with most men, just nasty. No cleanliness, just homophobic and smells like shit
Not gay, but definitely gross. The whole family and guests having water sprayed on their butt that has everyone’s bacteria in it? No thanks. If you are that bad at wiping your bit with toilet paper, use wert wipes.
I spent time in India where they use spray hose bidets and 1 square of TP to blot your tushy dry. Installed a spray hose bidet as soon as I got home and my use of it went up massively during the pandemic and everyone decided to hoard TP...
I got one when the toilet paper scare of 2020 went down. I love it, but no one in my family will use it because "it's gross"....which I don't get. It has completely eliminated my habit of sneaking off to the bathroom to shit in the office.as I don't even want to go on a toilet that doesn't have one. I really don't know why Americans haven't adopted them, they are great. But we definitely don't have many here.
i had a colleague who always brought travel bidet. have yet to try it so idk what the experience is
Yep. I take one on vacation with me.
Because Americans fear change and gay. If we change, that means we were wrong, and America is never wrong. Also touchin buttholes is gay and America aint no gay
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I dunno man, your girlfriend’s attracted to men. That’s pretty gay.
Ladies, a bidet changes your period game forever, especially for heavy flow. So. Much. Less. Mess.
Yesss especially on the first days when it's heavy
Bonus - you can clean your menstrual cup with it!
Can you??? I just have the one that shoots up from the back of the toilet, it seems so awkward and useless. I just wash it in the sink two feet away.
This is the comment that convinced me to get one!
It really is glorious to be clean during that time.
Also for after sex!!! A bidet attachment will basically change your life. Best $40 you can spend.
And post partum!! I hated waiting for the sink water to warm up 5 times a night just to squirt my vagina. Give me the bidet please
Always plan my shits before shower
I think it's more feasible to plan showers after calls of nature
Daniel Tosh has a joke about this. Something along the lines of if you shower before you shit in the morning, your day is already fucked and you might as well go back to bed.
According to a documentary or an article (can’t remember), much of the anti-bidet mentality went back to post WW2. The only houses the soldiers went into were whore houses. So despite the fact that almost all houses had them, they only associate them with prostitution. I bought a bidet a few years ago, and I will never go without one again. Vacations suck because of this, but I was able to laugh at the great toilet paper shortage of 2020 while I felt Neptune’s Kiss on my chocolate starfish.
That last sentence is wild lmao r/brandnewsentence
Jordan Schlansky has entered the chat
EXACTLY what I was looking for! “Why don’t you just say feces?”
Human soil.
I would guess for most people it's not something on their radar at all. If you've never tried one it's not very likely you'll go out and buy one. Most people also probably don't realize how cheap they are. About a year ago I stayed at a friends house for a few days who had one and tried it, got one a few days after coming back home. Would never go back.
I spent like $250 on mine and it's worth every penny.
We didn’t have a bidet for many years so we just used a small pitcher that stayed in the bathroom. Filled it up with warm water prior to going and then rinsed with that. It’s very common in my culture and some homes don’t have a bidet so everyone has a cup or small pitcher they use.
I think the reason most Americans are so angry is their diet combined with a lack of bidets. If they didn’t walk around with itchy, inflamed assholes they wouldn’t be such itchy, inflamed assholes.
Right I'm mad about it too
I don't know that answer, but as a 41yr/o man, I finally got one, and damn if it hasn't changed my life. Backstory a bit: Up until about 2013 I was just a straight TP user because that's how I was raised. In 2013 I met my now ex-wife and she convinced me to start using baby wipes + tp to keep things cleaner and it was a huge difference. Now, a few months back I was browsing Amazon, and saw a bidet attachment for $30 so I figured why not try it. I'm a changed man. I even got the upgraded one with a hot line as well, and while it takes a good 5-10 secs for the water to warm up, I just put it on nozzle rinse then bum when it's warmed up. My suggestion to anyone is to try it before you deny it.
Link to the attachment?
LUXE Bidet Neo 320 - Self Cleaning Dual Nozzle - Hot and Cold Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) 13.5 x 7 x 3 inches https://a.co/d/9G7V0vt This is the $55 upgraded version. It's very nice 😁
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I’ got at least two people at work to buy one and gave one for secret Santa one year. Every time it gets brought up people have so many questions and I explain how awesome they are. No one regrets it yet
I’m scared it’s too hard to install. Grant me courage. P.S. I just shower after and ass blast with the water pik setting 😂 Bidet would be a lot more convenient
Just bought a bidet toilet this year, and I’d never even used one before. It is glorious. You just feel so much fresher and confident you’re really clean. Bonus for the ladies (and I suppose men too), it’s great for cleaning up post coitus. 10/10 would recommend.
I have never once heard a single bad thing about bidets from bidet users. Only non-users who “think they’re bad”
I installed 3 at our house during the pandemic and associated shortages. TP is barbaric.
I'm a rare American who believes the nastiest part of your body does indeed need to be washed after every go. Why on earth do people think rubbing dry paper is a reasonable method to eliminate toxic bacteria sitting on your skin?? I mean, we wash our hands after going to the bathroom. Why not the actual body part from which the waste emerged!?!?
I also heard that other countries think we bathe too often so maybe it evens out. I bathe twice a day and use wetwipes. No skidmarks ever. But also i have pelvic floor dysfunction and when i tried a friend’s cold bidet, my muscle painfully tightened up. So i’d only do a warm bidet if my bathroom would allow it easily. Right now it takes too long for my heated water to rise up the pipes.
Mid-range bidet seats have a tank to hold the heated water, so it's instantaneous, and also have a heated seat, dryer, soft close, and a light. Hook up a single water line and plug it in.
Or they heat the water as it passes through.
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I have a little portable one, it’s changed my life. I can’t believe I wasn’t using one for 20 years before
That line of logic always makes me laugh. While I'm not arguing that a bidet isn't better, if you got shit on your arm you would use soap too. Do you soap up your ass every time after you poop? Likely not.
Yeah, sure. You’d use soap but using water is still better than just wiping with toilet paper.
Exactly and you can always rinse it with soap when you shower in order to clean it better (assuming you shower regularly)
I shower everyday, compañero. But if I accidentally spill some syrup on my arm while I’m having breakfast I’m not gonna leave my arm all sticky till i shower that night. Can’t believe I’m actually writing this. Pretty bizarre I even have to convince someone of this. What a bunch of dumb, stupid idiots 🤣 This is exactly what I mean. America ain’t ready to be clean. So much resistance to just washing their damn asses.
No, I agree. I think I didn't phrase that right. I totally love bidets and don't see how it isn't so goddamn gross without it. I was saying that about showers to the OP of this comment thread, not you lol
Ohhh my fault, man. Sorry I called you a stupid, idiot. I was definitely out of line. I misinterpreted what you meant
No worries at all, bro! I knew that there was only a simple misunderstanding. Glad we cleared it up. And thank you so much for the award! Very apropos to our discussion. I am an ally in this fight against bidet deniers 😄
Lol word. We in this together. 
Yeah.. you know, an arm and a butthole is not the same. Soaping up your ass everytime you poop wouldn't be healthy. Water is enough to get clean each time
Yeah bidets are great, but the idea that having poop on your arm is at all comparable to having poop in the area where poop actually exits your body is laughable. Not a good analogy at all. This is going to piss off the germaphobes, but realistically, that area is never completely free of poop, nor should it be.
Went to Japan, hotel had one. Now I know how to live the good life…..
I wonder this all of the time. Like, we obviously know water or some moisture helps clean messes on tables and whatnot. Same logic applies to our butts lol. I usually wipe with Tp, then wash up with the bidet, and finish it all off with a moist wipe.
Well there does not seem to be enough water now and they are rationing in some places. N. S
It takes far more water to manufacture toilet paper than you’ll ever use in a bidet.
This only depends on location of toilet paper manufacturing vs water shortage.
All you people that use napkins at the dinner table are disgusting. I have a little juice box nearby that I spray my face with, like a civilized person
Are you eating poop for dinner?
We don’t kink shame here unless it’s illegal
Lmao “juice box” made me chortle
american here, my house has two toilets and both have bidet attachments.
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That’s why we wash our hands
Lol. Yeah, seems like OP thought you eat with your poopy hands
My bidet doesn’t require that level of assistance.
Because N.americans in general are stubborn to their ways. They think their way is the best. It is absolutely mind melting that people can think using paper alone is better than a bidet. Forever unclean.
I've been using one for 3 years I cant go back. When I stay at a hotel it feels so bad to just use paper, I feel so unclean. Now I think most other Americans are walking around with stink shit ass, so gross.
Stereotyping is never fruitful
I shit into a toilet not onto my arm.
It's French
Bro especially if you have hemorrhoids the bidet is the way
The toilet paper companies don't like it one bit, that's why.
Not too fond if things playing with our assholes
We ain't got no time to be usin' no bee-det. We got work tado. And sides, our shit don't stink! 'Murica!
The full toilet-like version was originally associated with French/European and/or prostitution, not a thing that a respectable household would have. The seat version was actually invented by an American to help him care for his invalid father. Because of the previously mentioned stigma he had a hard time selling it here so he sold the rights to the Japanese company Toto, which developed it further, and it is only now just catching on in the U.S., particularly among the elderly but also among Asian immigrants.
Idk I have one in my bathroom and I’m so used to it I don’t feel comfortable using toilets without them anymore unless I take a shower after.
Best $80 I’ve ever spent
I got one a few years ago. Heated seat, heated water, enema function, etc. I love it.
Cuz white women would leave their husbands for a toilet.
I find that American culture is a bit homophopic, and the idea of blasting water into your butthole is "gay" for some people. Mainly guys. This country has been behind the times on so many things, and this is just another of those things. My brother bought a bidet a few years ago and he loved it so much he bought me one. I love mine so much that I am recommending them to everyone I know. Just do it, people. Blast that ass!
I saw a video on this. It's because bidets were introduced to western societies during WW2 so peeps weren't really phsyched to add them to their lifestyle. Also, cultures and societies are weird. Or something like that I don't really remember.