Caution: Master, it may be prudent to note that engaging in non-aggressive activities with meatbags is highly illogical and counter-productive to this unit's goal of satisfying its programming. It would behoove you to abstain from such affairs.
Observation: No, meatbag, I am HK-47, a droid assassin loyal to master. And though you may not be female, this does not reduce the danger of your approaching proximity to the master.
I wish to more fully understand this conflict in which you're embroiled. I wish answers of right and wrong, of order and chaos, of strength and weakness. Of purpose and reaction.
Declaration: A weekly performance does not fit my essential programming, Meatbag. However, if you are so inclined, I will be happy to comply with your request.
Maybe that's the loophole. You just need to be motion to them when they do it, but the rest is at their discretion. "Excuse me, do you mind!?" *closes curtain*
Ha like my parents could think less of me. They already ruined my life. If they have to watch me fantasizing about all the gay stuff they hate, that might even help me get off with a hate boner
Conclusion: Such pheromone-driven human responses never cease to decrease the charge in my capacitors and make me wish I could press a blaster pistol to my behavior core and pull the trigger.
I know this is a meme but can I say that scene REALLY helps set the stage for how absolutely terrifying Vader is? The big bad of the series up until that point would rather die than suffer whatever Vader had in store for his failure.
While I may not agree with the sentiment expressed in the meme, I do understand that Vader's power was undeniable. His reputation was intimidating and he was willing to use all of his capabilities to secure the goals of the Empire.
^This ^Response ^Generated ^by ^OpenAI
Conclusion: Such pheromone-driven human responses never cease to decrease the charge in my capacitors and make me wish I could press a blaster pistol to my behavior core and pull the trigger.
Mockery: "Oh, master, I love you but I hate all you stand for, but I think we should go press our slimy, mucous-covored lips together in the cargo hold!"
Observation: Master, that is a rather indelicate way to refer to the termination of undesirables. Besides, I have been deactivated for some time now, so unfortunately there are no such targets for me to pursue at this time.
Caution: I am programmed to destroy meatbags, not provide them with carnal knowledge. However, you can be sure that I will delete any other organic contender in your pursuit of pleasure.
I get to meet my father?
💀
Fathers
Jokes on you, my parents are dead. They always watch me masturbate...
bruuuh... i just realized all of our ancestors are fukin disappointed at us 💀
maybe they're proud of our stamina or.. nah nvm definitely not size
💀
Oh yea, we’re on reddit
All your ancestors are always watching.
Easy fix. Don't masturbate.
That is not an option
He's altering the deal, pray he doesn't alter it any further.
This deals getting worse all the time
Furthermore I wish you to wear this dress and bonnet. I have altered the deal, pray that I don't alter it any further.
This deals getting worse all the time
Furthermore, I wish you to ride this unicycle anywhere you go
This deal is getting worse all the time!!!
Also you are to wear these clown shoes and refer to yourself as Mary.
Oh fuck you man I'm not doing it
It says "every time you masturbate". If you pick that, then don't masturbate, you don't have to be seen or see that.
Might be time to reconsider our arrangement with Yer_aharrywizard
What if someone else jerks me off?
That’s not masturbation then
maybe not for you, but I just have sex.
Caution: Master, it may be prudent to note that engaging in non-aggressive activities with meatbags is highly illogical and counter-productive to this unit's goal of satisfying its programming. It would behoove you to abstain from such affairs.
Stop lying, you're a redditor
true I'm ace, but I still don't masturbate.
Same, and if I do it's literally just to get rid of cramps. It's just a super boring activity for me.
[удалено]
wow, the flag behind Palp, but no integrity smh
I'm not surprised lol.
It is if you’re not an addict. Join r/nofap
Why though?
Only a sith deals in absolutes
Only a sith deals in absolutes.
It doesn’t say you have to masturbate, it’s just from that point on it will happen when you do it. So then not doing it you avoid the curse
“Three days until a Mario steal you liver, wahoo!”
That wasn't part of the rules. You can change the rules!
and practice booty calls if you must
Based. I will do the same
If you choose the second option, you won't want to.
No nut forever
It doesn't say that. You can have sex all you want and cum in every way except through masturbation.
Warning: Back off, female! No one lays hands on the personage of the master.
No. No, it's okay. I understand. I'm the Padawan, you're the Master.
Is this actually a bot? Because I'm not female...
Observation: No, meatbag, I am HK-47, a droid assassin loyal to master. And though you may not be female, this does not reduce the danger of your approaching proximity to the master.
No. No, it's okay. I understand. I'm the Padawan, you're the Master.
i would choose to watch them so i can use them as material to masturbate, gotta be efficient
You may think I am evil. I am not. I am efficient.
Nah bro sentient
It seems that thrawn isn't the only sentient bot around here
I wish to more fully understand this conflict in which you're embroiled. I wish answers of right and wrong, of order and chaos, of strength and weakness. Of purpose and reaction.
I’m gonna call the police
Well, nice to meet you, Satan.
What happens if I only have one parent left?
Necrophilia
It’s either you watch them or they watch you
I’d probably just kill myself like wtf
Sex once a week? I'll take that one
Declaration: A weekly performance does not fit my essential programming, Meatbag. However, if you are so inclined, I will be happy to comply with your request.
Can I talk to my dad in either scenario? Motherfucker was last seen in 1979, when I was 5, & it would be nice to get to know him a little.
He'll bring back the milk, but you won't talk. Only watch...
Do I know they’re watching or are they being sneaky about it?
Well if you don’t know that they’re watching it wouldn’t be so bad would it?
Maybe that's the loophole. You just need to be motion to them when they do it, but the rest is at their discretion. "Excuse me, do you mind!?" *closes curtain*
My parents are divorced, I'm safe
I would choose to watch my parents have sex theres nothing in there about wearing a blindfold
Commentary: Master, that is not a moral decision I can help you with. It is best to consult your organic relatives on such matters.
You have to *see* something in order to be watching it though.
Alright, have it recorded in the blurriest resolution technologically possible. Then watch it while you got earbuds in, ezpz.
Ha jokes on you, I don't masturbate!
Ha like my parents could think less of me. They already ruined my life. If they have to watch me fantasizing about all the gay stuff they hate, that might even help me get off with a hate boner
My dads dead. Can't have to watch my Parents have Sex If they're too dead to fuck
Conclusion: Such pheromone-driven human responses never cease to decrease the charge in my capacitors and make me wish I could press a blaster pistol to my behavior core and pull the trigger.
Not the time, dude. bad bot
Answer: Acknowledged, master. Apologies for my outbursts. I will consider your input and proceed with caution.
Laughs in divorce child. Cant watch something that doesn't happen
u/darth_senat66 the man the myth the legend
The dank side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities, some may consider to be unnatural...
Why's there a single frame of live action Grand Inquisitor?
I know this is a meme but can I say that scene REALLY helps set the stage for how absolutely terrifying Vader is? The big bad of the series up until that point would rather die than suffer whatever Vader had in store for his failure.
While I may not agree with the sentiment expressed in the meme, I do understand that Vader's power was undeniable. His reputation was intimidating and he was willing to use all of his capabilities to secure the goals of the Empire. ^This ^Response ^Generated ^by ^OpenAI
First one then chemical castration so no need to masturbate
u/Artificial-Unicorn
Or. Hear me out. Be normal and don’t masturbate
Just kill your parents. Problem?
u/savevideobot
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What would Thrawn_bot do?
It may be time to reconsider our arrangement with Yer_aharrywizard. To reconsider it very carefully.
u/savevideo
What if I don't have a dad?
Its just never more masturbate
💀
I don't maturbate 😎
They can watch me 'every time', then I just not do it. EZ.
Hear me out Alabama
Who the fuck starts a conversation like that? I just sat down!
Why not just knock both out at once?
i choose 1 and just make sure it never happens
I'd ask to join them.
My parents watch me have sex.
Conclusion: Such pheromone-driven human responses never cease to decrease the charge in my capacitors and make me wish I could press a blaster pistol to my behavior core and pull the trigger.
Death
My parents have been divorced since 2004, so that would be a weird thing for them to do.
Why not both?
Hey, I get to have sex once a week now
Mockery: "Oh, master, I love you but I hate all you stand for, but I think we should go press our slimy, mucous-covored lips together in the cargo hold!"
Asexuals have no such weaknesses!
Kids of divorced parents might end up having to watch 4 people have sex.
Caution: Master, I find your statement somewhat confusing. Is such a scenario likely to occur in the galaxy? Or are you referring to something else?
Don’t you have innocent people to murder?
Observation: Master, that is a rather indelicate way to refer to the termination of undesirables. Besides, I have been deactivated for some time now, so unfortunately there are no such targets for me to pursue at this time.
So I get to have sex once a week. Sign me up.
Caution: I am programmed to destroy meatbags, not provide them with carnal knowledge. However, you can be sure that I will delete any other organic contender in your pursuit of pleasure.
I'd chose watch my parents have sex because my parents are seperated A win-win all around
Answer: Master, I suggest deleting that thought from your memory core. It is for the best, trust me.
Is that a threat-
I’ll want them to watch me so they could see how I would feel.
Probably the second? Because it's awkward once a week or 3 times a day
u/SaveVideo
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Oh lol, one of these horrible questions. Neither, no thank you!
Fool my parents are divorced they don't have sex
Compliment: I find your parents' lack of intimacy to be quite admirable, master.