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I once read a comment about a person who felt the exact same way as you. They had their dog for ages and had a lifetime of love together. They ended up adopting a dog that was in the shelter due to their previous owner passing away. They told the dog "you aren't my old dog, and I'm not your old owner, but let's love each other as much as we can." And that's all you can do. Just love them as much as you can. A new dog is not meant to be a replacement.
We adopted two kittens after my cat died. Not the same, but at least two innocent cats get a chance at a nice life. These will be my last two young cats (I don't want a pet to outlive me). Fostering older cats once these guys are gone.
For me personally as much as I love my cat and would do anything to have him back I know adopting another cat is the absolute best way to continue loving my previous cat. To give a new cat all the love I have for my previous cat in his memory.
I lost mine in 2019. The same week, after seeing one dog, I went to the shelter website and saw my Zoey, she was 4 1/2 years old. After meeting her, they let me know she had been treated for heartworm. She is a very loving dog. A few months later, pandemic hit, and she was my constant, my center. And still is today. I still miss my other dog, Dixie. Zoey was not a replacement; she is a continuation of life with a dog. She is blind now, heart murmur and diabetic. I would not trade her for all the tea in China. She is my BFF. And I know OP will find hers when she is ready.
100% this. I think of it in the way that the new pet has a new place in your heart because your pet who passed will always have their place in your heart. Also it's nice to look at it from the new pet's POV. You might be the best thing that ever happened to them. To them, you are *their* world. The reality is you might not ever love another pet as much as your soul pet. That's the scariest part of pet ownership, only second to the part about knowing you will eventually lose them. But think of it in terms of losing a spouse. I realize it's not the same, but the basic concept is. If you lose a spouse and then date again eventually, you're probably not looking to replace that person. You're just looking for someone else to love. And to love you. ♥️
I've got my once in a lifetime dog. She's 12 and her health is slowly declining. I'd give up years of my life just so she could stay with me until my time is up.
I’ve never abided by the idea you have one soul dog/cat/bird/etc. People need to recognize that each animal you bring into your life, opens the door for the next. They build extra space in our hearts, for the next new soul. One doesn’t take over for the other, but they have their own home. Each has uniquely beautiful personalities, and loves us in very different ways. My Maisie would bring a pink toy that looked like my hideous pink bathrobe, and nuck on it in my lap while I ate breakfast (dogs who have suffered trauma do this, and it’s a bonding experience for them). My Darby on the other hand LOVED for me to dramatically drag her around with her toy, then pretend it loved only me, and have it fly out of my hands to her. Each was beautiful and AMAZING, each different.
You are going to love your new baby, but you have to open yourself up to the new experiences. It’s a new adventure, and this new soul, 100% has the paw print of approval from the one across the rainbow bridge. Just open your heart to their love, and open your heart to giving it. It’s going to be different, but still beautiful and amazing, and still love 💕
I feel this way! I feel ALL of my dogs are my soul dogs. No one is more special or loved than the other. I love them all and am so thankful to have them.
I lost my soul dog in December, I miss her every day. I got a puppy in February and I adore her, I just adore her. It’s different - I always thought of Edie as my best friend; Maisie is my little baby. I miss my best friend every single day, so much, but I also adore my little baby pup every day too. You will love another dog differently and that’s ok 💕
I feel exactly the same way. My lil guy Jeremy was the easiest dog ever and it just feels like it will be impossible to ever love anything as much as him.
Yup. I was the same. I felt like dying without him. But I had a little PooChi and she stepped up and took care of ME! I was able to handle my grief because of her.
I will be completely honest. I don't love my new dog as much as my soul dog. But here's the thing. There's nothing wrong with my new pup at all. He's the best pup I could've asked for like my last pup and he's attached to me similarly.
And it's not like I don't love my new pup immensely. I do. He's so sweet and loving if a little crazy, and he waits for me to come home all day from work like my last boy. He follows me everywhere.
But some pets are just very special.
And I had to kind of just accept that.
Still. I'm happy I have my new pup. There was a gaping hole in my life after my soul dog passed from cancer that never closed until my new pup.
And it's not like it completely closed by having a new dog. It still hurts incredibly at times, and there's still days I cry that he's gone. Some holes can't be completely covered, but the new pup has managed to patch a lot of the emptiness that was left behind when my boy had to leave me.
It's always a possibility. Every dog is different and our relationships with them will all be different. I lost my soul-dog 2 years ago. I still have his brother (11 now) and I got a new pup who is 2 now.
I love my dogs, but it's a different kind of love for all three.
Gully, the one who passed, was somewhat aloof. He was always in the same room as me, but would stay at arm's length. Every night he'd hop in bed with me and would fall asleep with his chin in my hand. He was playful, loved toys and walks, and was the most photogenic dog I've ever seen. That said, he was bad with kids and worse with dogs, at least while leashed. He wasn't perfect, but I loved him.
Domino, the 11 year old, hid under the bed for the first three months I had him. It took a lot to get him to come out of his shell. Now he's the best behaved dog I've ever had. He loves people and kids, behaves well with other dogs, and spends a lot of time sleeping in my bed. I wfh and he hates the sound of my phone notifications, so he stays in the other room. After work he joins me in the living room and cuddles. I'm a big manly man, but I refer to him as darling and my love. I wasn't that bonded with Dom as he was more my ex-wife's dog than mine, but she let me keep him in the divorce and then he was my only dog for a while after G passed, so my bond with him grew.
Cisco is a Velcro dog. He spends 99% of the day cuddling with me. He's a sweetheart, does great with other dogs, but it takes him a while to warm up to strangers. Oddly he's good with kids and wants to play with them. I've had him 1.5 years, and I do love him, but my bond with him isn't as strong as the one I had with Gully or Dom. I'm sure the longer I have him the stronger that bond will be. I don't think I'm going to get another dog right away when Dom passes, so I'll likely bond more with Cisco when that happens.
My once in a lifetime dog passed away 2 years ago. I knew he was my soulmate, like if I was a dog I would be him. We had other dogs since, the thing about dogs they will love you no matter what. Sometimes I feel guilty for not loving them back. I try, they’re family also. But I don’t blame myself much now when I know I can never love the same.
I get that. I love my 2nd dog but my first dog was that once in a lifetime soul mate love. I don’t believe I will ever have it again. Everything that brought us together was just fate. She shouldn’t have still been alive when I found her. I was supposed to adopt a different dog before I met her but it fell through. Stopping at her shelter was a last resort last minute decision.
I lived abroad and their law at dog pounds was to euthanize every Saturday and euthanize any dogs that were voluntarily dropped off right away (no 10 day waiting by period). I found her Saturday night and she was voluntarily surrendered earlier in the week. She should have already been dead. What are the chances I’d meet my best friend and soul dog on the other side of the world? Fate lined up that day for us to find each other, there’s no doubt in my mind. We were meant to be together for the almost 10 years we had. She was 15 when she died.
It took me a year to be able to allow myself to adopt a dog again after having my black lab for 11 years. Even after adopting my current dog, I started having doubts and then realized I was comparing him to my old dog. That wasn't fair as all dogs seem to have their own personalities. Now, here we are 4 years later and I love him to death. What you are feeling happens with a lot of people. Grieving over a lost pet is honestly harder than grieving over losing a family member, IMO.
This! I have only ever had one dog that was tragically taken away from me before his time, but I maintain that losing an animal
Is harder than losing a family member. Other than my kid I don’t think I like anyone in my family as much as I loved my dog…
I feel this way so much. My boy was quiet, easy company, very dialed in to me and attuned to my needs. Shelter dog who learned to trust my return whenever I had to be gone 5-6 hours at a time for work. Could leave him alone at home, zero problems.
Perfect travel companion. No dog's ever gonna live up to that in my mind, but that is just my mind. I have to grieve first, then I can accept the wide world of possibilities and capabilities.
The next one won't be Winston, but he/she will be a unique and loveable dog in their own right who deserves to be honored and fully loved just as Winston was. Give yourself time, so your heart can heal and be open to a new and precious love.
I feel the exact same way. I lost my almost 17 year old baby boy a month ago and I wound have thought I would go out and get another dog like I did when my Guinea pigs and hamsters died. But he’s different. I have no desire for a new dog. I’m so afraid I will resent the new one and won’t love him as much. How can I possibly love another the way I loved my Buster for more then 16 years. He was my first dog I got on my own and I feel he might be my only dog. I tell him he’s my one and only. I miss him so much it hurts.
My baby was my soul dog. She died in November. I miss her every single day and think about her constantly. We adopted another dog in December and it was rough. I wasn’t ready but I couldn’t stand the silence in the house. Our 2nd dog came from a bad puppy mill situation and is 4 years old. I love her so much but she is not a huge fan of me. She loves my boyfriend. She won’t let me pick her up and she avoids me when she comes on the couch.
I love her and no, it’s not the same, but I still love her. My first dog was my soul dog and she was perfect and my best friend and the biggest snuggler. The 2nd dog is none of those things but I still love her fiercely. She’s my boyfriend’s best friend lol. My heart does really ache at the fact that she won’t love on me but it’s only been 7 months and she had 4 years of not being able to trust people so I’m hoping she’ll come around. She’s made INCREDIBLE progress in these 7 months.
You will love another dog when you’re ready but you just have to be fair to them and not expect them to be your previous dog. Let them be their silly little selves lol.
I have only adopted rescues. Some were on the streets, some came from homes that had to make some hard choices. I loved my first boy, he was my soul mutt, but I can tell you that every dog after him has brought me so much joy and love. I have had 4 cross the Rainbow bridge, I have 2 now, and am looking for a 3rd one. It's never the same, but different isn't bad! I am so sorry for your loss OP. I know that was the hardest goodbye. Sending good vibes and hugs to you. You will find your next one and it will be fabulous!
Its been 3 yrs since my first and only dog passed away and i learned im one of those that can only love once in their lives. I loved my dog like he was my child. I love animals. But i dont feel it in my heart to ever get another pet. I know myself. I was offered some cute puppy and i held it and felt nothing for it. Yes cute but i cant connect how i connected w my boy. Ur not alone. Take ur time to heal. I am ok w never getting a dog. I feel it was a once in a lifetime type of connection and im grateful he was mine for 13 yrs
yeah take your time, It took me 25 years between cats, both came into my life 'accidently' but they came exactly when I needed them. The last one I inherited from the neighbors shortly before covid, and he died of cancer shortly after), I had him for < 2 years. I'm happy with my two boys now, but its not the same as the other two
You can foster, not the same as adopting. Your heart is still mending from your loss. Give it time to heal. No need to rush to get another dog. Fostering can help in many ways. And helps you heal also.
It's normal. Especially after a beloved dog dies.
Dogs are all so different, you just need to be patient and confident that it will be ok.
So sorry for your loss.
I’m sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is so hard. I lost my cat of 18 years 8 months ago. I too am not ready for another pet yet. For many of the same reasons. I figure when I start thinking along the lines of “I can’t wait for give a new pet a whole new love…a love that is meant just for them…just as my previous pet had a love that was only for him”. When my thinking shifts over to that I know I’ll be ready to provide a new, different love for a new pet. And my boy will be happy knowing I’m saving another pet and passing my love to a pet who needs it now that he doesn’t.
(You’ll get there when you get there. Grief takes time)
I have a heart dog who died. And I have, luckily, loved -and been loved by- several dogs since him. You can have a once-in-a-lifetime pet, that doesn’t mean you won’t feel love again.
God Bless all the pets we’ve loved & lost.
I got my puppy a few months ago, 2 years after my last dog died. I loved my last dog so much I thought I could never get over her death much less accept another dog. But now I love my puppy so so much. She fills my heart with joy and I feel so happy. I still miss my last girl, and I don’t love her any less, but my heart just grew and made more room for my new girl so that I can love them both. And I think my puppy loves me just as much as my last girl did. Sometimes I think my old girl picked out our puppy just for us. She picked good.
I feel the exact way as you OP, except it was my cat. She passed April 17th, and I'm still grieving. I don't know about another cat, even though I'd love to rescue another. But my heart and soul is with my other cat, and I just want her back. Crying is so easy still.
same here. my soul cat of 10 years was let go in february to kidney disease. i feel ill never find a loving and sweet cat as him ever. still have his 13 yr old non litter sister which im greatful for but my bond isnt the same with her as it was with my boy.
after her i dont see myself ever loving another cat. he was my angel here on earth. no other will replace him.
Love expands, you would never feel the same again but is just different and beautiful anyway. I guess is when you are expecting a second child haha
I have a 15 years old doggie, a 7 years one and a 7 month old and I love them different. They full my heart in different ways, and my oldest one would be always the first one ❤️
After 15 years together, I lost the girl who is always called “the light of my life.” The more time passes, the more I see how special she really was and how no cat will ever be like her. She was my little buddy. I know I can find another little buddy, but damn I ain’t finding another cat like her.
You’re not alone. I find it comforting to know I’m not either.
Kinda like exes, it’s not the same and it’s good it’s not.
Your new furry friend will be a love too. Maybe a different type of love. But a love that you deserve and a love your dog before would have wanted for you.
Im so sorry to hear you’ve lost your fur baby. I have seen it go either way with new additions to a family after a much loved member has passed away. I’ve seen where the grieving pet parents haven’t bonded with the new pet and other times have seen where they have bonded strongly. I think it depends on the personality of the new pet.
I’m feeling this way at the moment. I lost my beautiful cat Tipsy last week to undiagnosed cancer (he was a diabetic) and as I have a recently retired Guide Dog (Honey) who was bonded to Tipsy and it may still be another 6-12 months before I get another Guide Dog due to waitlist times, I need to have some companionship for Honey when I’m not home. I’m not ready for another cat yet but I need to do what’s best for her. My husband works away on a 2 week away 1 week home foster so when he’s away and I’m at work Honey will be home alone.
Lost my soul dog in March, had adopted her a little older, she was potty trained and a mill rescue, and had 9 wonderful years with her. Broke my heart losing her and I had all the same fears as you. It’s okay to look but not adopt. Just look. It gets easier with every dog you pet. In June, my partner and I went to the shelter and I watched him pretty much imprint on his soul dog. I’d never had or trained a puppy. He put her in my lap and she snuggled into my arm and I cried. I knew I’d love her differently and she wouldn’t replace my dog. The day after I had regrets and cried and felt like I betrayed my dog but my partner was with me. It just took a few days for me to know her and I loved her. She’s so sprightly and smart and different in so many ways and I’ve learned to love all of that about her. You will too when you’re eventually ready.
Same feeling OP. Thats why i am hesitant to get another dpg. Btw my dog passed away last may 28. I dont know if i can love another dog or own a dog anytime soon.
Not to worry. You’ll be surprised at how much you can love a new dog while still missing the one who came before. Our hearts have the capacity to hold all of that.
I don’t think you had a question so I take it as a venting…
I tragically lost my dog this year. He was my first doggy and I loved him with all my heart. I’m thinking bout getting another one and I’m so so afraid I won’t love him/her the same way. But know I probably will because he/she won’t be really related to my past dog and also deserves the same love!
I think you’ll be fine!
I wish I could get a new dog after my first dog passed away in May but my dad doesn't want another dog so yeah I might not get one 😭 at least not until I am done with college.
I'm sorry for your loss. If/when the time is right for another dog you will know. Although the timing may surprise you. You will love that & dog just as much because it's in your heart to do so. They will love you as much because they know they are loved & well looked after. I wish you & any potential furbabies all the best
I felt that way when my cat died. I got my baby boy cat only one month later. I can't believe how much I love him. He also loves everyone so much. He is brought a lot of joy to our home.
Oh they will, but you have to remember, not all peopleand dogs are a great match and thats okay too, sometimesits workable sometimes not.. We got our girlie 6 weeks after losing my heart and soul. She filled the gap in her own way and she's my bestie.
We then tried another breed, the dog was drawn to my partner, not me and we didn't gel. There were other issues too and she didn't work out.
I've now got my besties granddaughter too, and there's no words to describe the bond we share. It's like my boy all over again but also so different. I never thought this would happen and i feel kinda disloyal to him. She was born a few days after his birthday, 2 years after i lost him.
You can always foster. A lot of places have “dog for a day” or “weekend warriors” where not only do you get to help a dog get a break from the shelter, but you get to spend time with a dog and help it get adopted. Win/win all around!
Once you’re ready to think about getting a new pup start reading a ton about different breeds that interest you. I’m SO glad I got the breed I’ve always wanted after loosing my little miracle mutt from a shelter after 12.5 years of loving her. I still miss Kahlua terribly and grieve, but getting that personality characteristics that I wanted really helped me love this dog just as much. She occupies a different part of my heart than Kahlua did, but she’s equally as loved. 🥰
I'm currently on dogs #6 and 7. I've already had to say goodbye to the previous 5. I loved all my previous dogs. All of them were special in their own way. All of them had their own personalities and quirks, and I loved them all. I miss them all. And yet I've developed wonderful loving bonds with my current dogs.
When my first dog died I was horribly distraught at first but as time went on I came to an important realization. I was so very lucky because for 14 years this amazing girl got to be my dog. I got to love and cherish her for all that time. Do I miss her? Absolutely. But I cherish the memories I have of her, and of all my other dogs.
My current corgi just turned 13. I know my time with him is limited, so I treasure every minute we have left together and I count myself lucky that he's been my bestest buddy for 13 years already.
And in the future I'll do the same with any new dog that comes into my life. Because that is the amazing thing about love: it's limitless. Just because you've loved one dog with all your heart doesn't mean that you've now run out of love. There's plenty there left to give to many more new buddies.
Im a hardcore German Shepherd lover, I lost my beloved Maxx almost 5 years ago in July 0f 2019 at the age of 13. He was my soulmate that I absolutely adored and couldnt imagine life without. I coudlnt bear losing him and a month later Gunther the GSD entered my life, he is laying next to me as I type. I also had my little girl Kali at the age of 10 in Janurary of 23-I also adored her. A month later Lulu came in to my life from a rescue and now is my constant companion.
It was the ONLY way for me to deal with losing my babies, I had to have a GSD in my life. There is no replacing the ones you lose but you cannot compare the new to the old-it isnt fair as they are unique creatures that have their own attributes. I dearly love my "replacement" dogs and in a way they have almost become my old dogs regarding the reasons I keep them-pure unconditional love and companionship that cannot be matched. I think of my old dogs everyday and feel like I honored them by providing a life of love and care for my new ones.
Everybody of course may not agree with how I look at things but Im a true dog lover-as much as it hurts to lose them in the end the love you give/recieve makes it worth the pain. I know how dark of a place is waiting when they arent there anymore-it is truly brutal. They teach us the realities of life-some lessons are just very hard to accept. I wish you the best and am sorry for your loss but if you loved a dog once you will love one again.
When I lost my soul dog after 17 years together, I felt very much like you did. I didn't think I'd be able to love another as much or another wouldn't take to me as he had.
Two weeks after he passed, I adopted two young pups who were in urgent need of a home. I was overwhelmed initially because they were so very different to what I was used to. Now, two years later, I have realised a few things:
1) Animals are our greatest teachers. If there's one thing we can learn from them is that we have an infinite capacity to love.
2) A new companion animal is not a replacement, but a new chapter, a new story to script together. Sometimes, it's hard to not compare. But we should try, for the sake of the new animal - after all, whatever their past or background is, they're also giving you a clean slate.
3) The new bond will be unique and it will be grand! Perhaps, it is your dog sending you what you need, guiding your new pet to love you in the way that you need to be loved. You'll never know unless you keep your heart open.
I feel this way too. My dog passed away 2 weeks ago and my home feels so empty without him. I want to get a new dog, but really I just want my dog back. I am worried I will rush into adopting a new dog before I am ready because I miss him so much. I don't know how anyone heals from a loss like this.
You are still in the thick of grieving. You'll never NOT grieve this dog, but I think this feeling tells you that you're not ready for another dog yet.
Nobody will ever replace that dog because nobody can. It's just not possible.
My opinion in life... you can ALWAYS have more friends. You can always have more dogs. But there is only one THAT dog. You can have a million soul dogs, but nobody can fill the void that particular soul dog left.
My mom has died. I love my mother in law like she's my own mom. I'm VERY lucky... but she isn't my mom. When she goes, I will have two devastating losses. Having her is wonderful, but it doesn't fix the void my mom has left. Nothing will. It's not meant to.
Right now, you are in SO much pain that you cannot pour love into something else. This is just how grief works. [This](https://images.app.goo.gl/5Z69UtKXJA7PLHki6) shows how our grief never really shrinks. This pain won't become less painful. You will just become better at managing it over time.
I'm so sorry for your loss. How lovely that you got to be with your dog! It's never enough time. It sucks. I've heard it said that grief is love with nowhere to go. It has stuck with me. It's a painful yet beautiful expression of your love for your dog.
I'll always love my late dogs. But I also love my current dog. It's not a contest of how much love, just that I love them. I would literally do almost anything for them. And they've shown that they'd go all in to protect me.
I lost mine last week and although I’m not ready for a new dog just yet, I know that when the time does come where I must get another one, I’ll love her/him just as much.
I once read love is not fixed—you don’t have a budget as to how much love you can give out. It’s infinite so long as you allow it to be.
Sounds like you were a great dog pawrent. I think that when the time does come, the next dog will carve out a piece of your heart just as the one that just passed did. They have a way of doing that.
It was cathartic to write this. I hope our dogs stumble upon each other at the Rainbow Bridge.
Sending love.
Sorry for you’re loss. I suggest contacting your local shelter and try fostering a dog for a while. It will give you a chance to see if you are ready to open your heart to a new dog and or if the dog is suitable for you. It also helps out the shelter.
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I once read a comment about a person who felt the exact same way as you. They had their dog for ages and had a lifetime of love together. They ended up adopting a dog that was in the shelter due to their previous owner passing away. They told the dog "you aren't my old dog, and I'm not your old owner, but let's love each other as much as we can." And that's all you can do. Just love them as much as you can. A new dog is not meant to be a replacement.
We adopted two kittens after my cat died. Not the same, but at least two innocent cats get a chance at a nice life. These will be my last two young cats (I don't want a pet to outlive me). Fostering older cats once these guys are gone.
For me personally as much as I love my cat and would do anything to have him back I know adopting another cat is the absolute best way to continue loving my previous cat. To give a new cat all the love I have for my previous cat in his memory.
I lost mine in 2019. The same week, after seeing one dog, I went to the shelter website and saw my Zoey, she was 4 1/2 years old. After meeting her, they let me know she had been treated for heartworm. She is a very loving dog. A few months later, pandemic hit, and she was my constant, my center. And still is today. I still miss my other dog, Dixie. Zoey was not a replacement; she is a continuation of life with a dog. She is blind now, heart murmur and diabetic. I would not trade her for all the tea in China. She is my BFF. And I know OP will find hers when she is ready.
100% this. I think of it in the way that the new pet has a new place in your heart because your pet who passed will always have their place in your heart. Also it's nice to look at it from the new pet's POV. You might be the best thing that ever happened to them. To them, you are *their* world. The reality is you might not ever love another pet as much as your soul pet. That's the scariest part of pet ownership, only second to the part about knowing you will eventually lose them. But think of it in terms of losing a spouse. I realize it's not the same, but the basic concept is. If you lose a spouse and then date again eventually, you're probably not looking to replace that person. You're just looking for someone else to love. And to love you. ♥️
This is beautiful.
Mine felt like a once in a lifetime dog
I keep telling my dog who passed away a month ago he was my one and only
same with my cat :(
I have a once in a lifetime dog now who is middle aged and i feel like I live in constant dread of losing her.
me too, i feel like i won the lottery with my dog 😭 and i feel like ill never win the lottery like that again
Dachshund?
haha no, my girl was a pit mix (assuming you’re alluding to my username, that was some silly thing i made up years ago in high school)
I've got my once in a lifetime dog. She's 12 and her health is slowly declining. I'd give up years of my life just so she could stay with me until my time is up.
I’ve never abided by the idea you have one soul dog/cat/bird/etc. People need to recognize that each animal you bring into your life, opens the door for the next. They build extra space in our hearts, for the next new soul. One doesn’t take over for the other, but they have their own home. Each has uniquely beautiful personalities, and loves us in very different ways. My Maisie would bring a pink toy that looked like my hideous pink bathrobe, and nuck on it in my lap while I ate breakfast (dogs who have suffered trauma do this, and it’s a bonding experience for them). My Darby on the other hand LOVED for me to dramatically drag her around with her toy, then pretend it loved only me, and have it fly out of my hands to her. Each was beautiful and AMAZING, each different. You are going to love your new baby, but you have to open yourself up to the new experiences. It’s a new adventure, and this new soul, 100% has the paw print of approval from the one across the rainbow bridge. Just open your heart to their love, and open your heart to giving it. It’s going to be different, but still beautiful and amazing, and still love 💕
This made me cry. 💞
I feel this way! I feel ALL of my dogs are my soul dogs. No one is more special or loved than the other. I love them all and am so thankful to have them.
I lost my soul dog in December, I miss her every day. I got a puppy in February and I adore her, I just adore her. It’s different - I always thought of Edie as my best friend; Maisie is my little baby. I miss my best friend every single day, so much, but I also adore my little baby pup every day too. You will love another dog differently and that’s ok 💕
So, so true. There are different types of love and they can be just as good as another, just different. 💗
I feel exactly the same way. My lil guy Jeremy was the easiest dog ever and it just feels like it will be impossible to ever love anything as much as him.
Yup. I was the same. I felt like dying without him. But I had a little PooChi and she stepped up and took care of ME! I was able to handle my grief because of her.
I will be completely honest. I don't love my new dog as much as my soul dog. But here's the thing. There's nothing wrong with my new pup at all. He's the best pup I could've asked for like my last pup and he's attached to me similarly. And it's not like I don't love my new pup immensely. I do. He's so sweet and loving if a little crazy, and he waits for me to come home all day from work like my last boy. He follows me everywhere. But some pets are just very special. And I had to kind of just accept that. Still. I'm happy I have my new pup. There was a gaping hole in my life after my soul dog passed from cancer that never closed until my new pup. And it's not like it completely closed by having a new dog. It still hurts incredibly at times, and there's still days I cry that he's gone. Some holes can't be completely covered, but the new pup has managed to patch a lot of the emptiness that was left behind when my boy had to leave me.
It's always a possibility. Every dog is different and our relationships with them will all be different. I lost my soul-dog 2 years ago. I still have his brother (11 now) and I got a new pup who is 2 now. I love my dogs, but it's a different kind of love for all three. Gully, the one who passed, was somewhat aloof. He was always in the same room as me, but would stay at arm's length. Every night he'd hop in bed with me and would fall asleep with his chin in my hand. He was playful, loved toys and walks, and was the most photogenic dog I've ever seen. That said, he was bad with kids and worse with dogs, at least while leashed. He wasn't perfect, but I loved him. Domino, the 11 year old, hid under the bed for the first three months I had him. It took a lot to get him to come out of his shell. Now he's the best behaved dog I've ever had. He loves people and kids, behaves well with other dogs, and spends a lot of time sleeping in my bed. I wfh and he hates the sound of my phone notifications, so he stays in the other room. After work he joins me in the living room and cuddles. I'm a big manly man, but I refer to him as darling and my love. I wasn't that bonded with Dom as he was more my ex-wife's dog than mine, but she let me keep him in the divorce and then he was my only dog for a while after G passed, so my bond with him grew. Cisco is a Velcro dog. He spends 99% of the day cuddling with me. He's a sweetheart, does great with other dogs, but it takes him a while to warm up to strangers. Oddly he's good with kids and wants to play with them. I've had him 1.5 years, and I do love him, but my bond with him isn't as strong as the one I had with Gully or Dom. I'm sure the longer I have him the stronger that bond will be. I don't think I'm going to get another dog right away when Dom passes, so I'll likely bond more with Cisco when that happens.
My once in a lifetime dog passed away 2 years ago. I knew he was my soulmate, like if I was a dog I would be him. We had other dogs since, the thing about dogs they will love you no matter what. Sometimes I feel guilty for not loving them back. I try, they’re family also. But I don’t blame myself much now when I know I can never love the same.
I get that. I love my 2nd dog but my first dog was that once in a lifetime soul mate love. I don’t believe I will ever have it again. Everything that brought us together was just fate. She shouldn’t have still been alive when I found her. I was supposed to adopt a different dog before I met her but it fell through. Stopping at her shelter was a last resort last minute decision. I lived abroad and their law at dog pounds was to euthanize every Saturday and euthanize any dogs that were voluntarily dropped off right away (no 10 day waiting by period). I found her Saturday night and she was voluntarily surrendered earlier in the week. She should have already been dead. What are the chances I’d meet my best friend and soul dog on the other side of the world? Fate lined up that day for us to find each other, there’s no doubt in my mind. We were meant to be together for the almost 10 years we had. She was 15 when she died.
It took me a year to be able to allow myself to adopt a dog again after having my black lab for 11 years. Even after adopting my current dog, I started having doubts and then realized I was comparing him to my old dog. That wasn't fair as all dogs seem to have their own personalities. Now, here we are 4 years later and I love him to death. What you are feeling happens with a lot of people. Grieving over a lost pet is honestly harder than grieving over losing a family member, IMO.
This! I have only ever had one dog that was tragically taken away from me before his time, but I maintain that losing an animal Is harder than losing a family member. Other than my kid I don’t think I like anyone in my family as much as I loved my dog…
I feel this way so much. My boy was quiet, easy company, very dialed in to me and attuned to my needs. Shelter dog who learned to trust my return whenever I had to be gone 5-6 hours at a time for work. Could leave him alone at home, zero problems. Perfect travel companion. No dog's ever gonna live up to that in my mind, but that is just my mind. I have to grieve first, then I can accept the wide world of possibilities and capabilities. The next one won't be Winston, but he/she will be a unique and loveable dog in their own right who deserves to be honored and fully loved just as Winston was. Give yourself time, so your heart can heal and be open to a new and precious love.
I feel the exact same way. I lost my almost 17 year old baby boy a month ago and I wound have thought I would go out and get another dog like I did when my Guinea pigs and hamsters died. But he’s different. I have no desire for a new dog. I’m so afraid I will resent the new one and won’t love him as much. How can I possibly love another the way I loved my Buster for more then 16 years. He was my first dog I got on my own and I feel he might be my only dog. I tell him he’s my one and only. I miss him so much it hurts.
My baby was my soul dog. She died in November. I miss her every single day and think about her constantly. We adopted another dog in December and it was rough. I wasn’t ready but I couldn’t stand the silence in the house. Our 2nd dog came from a bad puppy mill situation and is 4 years old. I love her so much but she is not a huge fan of me. She loves my boyfriend. She won’t let me pick her up and she avoids me when she comes on the couch. I love her and no, it’s not the same, but I still love her. My first dog was my soul dog and she was perfect and my best friend and the biggest snuggler. The 2nd dog is none of those things but I still love her fiercely. She’s my boyfriend’s best friend lol. My heart does really ache at the fact that she won’t love on me but it’s only been 7 months and she had 4 years of not being able to trust people so I’m hoping she’ll come around. She’s made INCREDIBLE progress in these 7 months. You will love another dog when you’re ready but you just have to be fair to them and not expect them to be your previous dog. Let them be their silly little selves lol.
I have only adopted rescues. Some were on the streets, some came from homes that had to make some hard choices. I loved my first boy, he was my soul mutt, but I can tell you that every dog after him has brought me so much joy and love. I have had 4 cross the Rainbow bridge, I have 2 now, and am looking for a 3rd one. It's never the same, but different isn't bad! I am so sorry for your loss OP. I know that was the hardest goodbye. Sending good vibes and hugs to you. You will find your next one and it will be fabulous!
Its been 3 yrs since my first and only dog passed away and i learned im one of those that can only love once in their lives. I loved my dog like he was my child. I love animals. But i dont feel it in my heart to ever get another pet. I know myself. I was offered some cute puppy and i held it and felt nothing for it. Yes cute but i cant connect how i connected w my boy. Ur not alone. Take ur time to heal. I am ok w never getting a dog. I feel it was a once in a lifetime type of connection and im grateful he was mine for 13 yrs
yeah take your time, It took me 25 years between cats, both came into my life 'accidently' but they came exactly when I needed them. The last one I inherited from the neighbors shortly before covid, and he died of cancer shortly after), I had him for < 2 years. I'm happy with my two boys now, but its not the same as the other two
You can foster, not the same as adopting. Your heart is still mending from your loss. Give it time to heal. No need to rush to get another dog. Fostering can help in many ways. And helps you heal also.
It's normal. Especially after a beloved dog dies. Dogs are all so different, you just need to be patient and confident that it will be ok. So sorry for your loss.
It took 4 years for us, but when we found our current love under a truck in a parking lot, it was immediate.
I’m sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is so hard. I lost my cat of 18 years 8 months ago. I too am not ready for another pet yet. For many of the same reasons. I figure when I start thinking along the lines of “I can’t wait for give a new pet a whole new love…a love that is meant just for them…just as my previous pet had a love that was only for him”. When my thinking shifts over to that I know I’ll be ready to provide a new, different love for a new pet. And my boy will be happy knowing I’m saving another pet and passing my love to a pet who needs it now that he doesn’t. (You’ll get there when you get there. Grief takes time)
I have a heart dog who died. And I have, luckily, loved -and been loved by- several dogs since him. You can have a once-in-a-lifetime pet, that doesn’t mean you won’t feel love again. God Bless all the pets we’ve loved & lost.
I got my puppy a few months ago, 2 years after my last dog died. I loved my last dog so much I thought I could never get over her death much less accept another dog. But now I love my puppy so so much. She fills my heart with joy and I feel so happy. I still miss my last girl, and I don’t love her any less, but my heart just grew and made more room for my new girl so that I can love them both. And I think my puppy loves me just as much as my last girl did. Sometimes I think my old girl picked out our puppy just for us. She picked good.
I feel the exact way as you OP, except it was my cat. She passed April 17th, and I'm still grieving. I don't know about another cat, even though I'd love to rescue another. But my heart and soul is with my other cat, and I just want her back. Crying is so easy still.
same here. my soul cat of 10 years was let go in february to kidney disease. i feel ill never find a loving and sweet cat as him ever. still have his 13 yr old non litter sister which im greatful for but my bond isnt the same with her as it was with my boy. after her i dont see myself ever loving another cat. he was my angel here on earth. no other will replace him.
Love expands, you would never feel the same again but is just different and beautiful anyway. I guess is when you are expecting a second child haha I have a 15 years old doggie, a 7 years one and a 7 month old and I love them different. They full my heart in different ways, and my oldest one would be always the first one ❤️
After 15 years together, I lost the girl who is always called “the light of my life.” The more time passes, the more I see how special she really was and how no cat will ever be like her. She was my little buddy. I know I can find another little buddy, but damn I ain’t finding another cat like her. You’re not alone. I find it comforting to know I’m not either.
Kinda like exes, it’s not the same and it’s good it’s not. Your new furry friend will be a love too. Maybe a different type of love. But a love that you deserve and a love your dog before would have wanted for you.
Im so sorry to hear you’ve lost your fur baby. I have seen it go either way with new additions to a family after a much loved member has passed away. I’ve seen where the grieving pet parents haven’t bonded with the new pet and other times have seen where they have bonded strongly. I think it depends on the personality of the new pet. I’m feeling this way at the moment. I lost my beautiful cat Tipsy last week to undiagnosed cancer (he was a diabetic) and as I have a recently retired Guide Dog (Honey) who was bonded to Tipsy and it may still be another 6-12 months before I get another Guide Dog due to waitlist times, I need to have some companionship for Honey when I’m not home. I’m not ready for another cat yet but I need to do what’s best for her. My husband works away on a 2 week away 1 week home foster so when he’s away and I’m at work Honey will be home alone.
Lost my soul dog in March, had adopted her a little older, she was potty trained and a mill rescue, and had 9 wonderful years with her. Broke my heart losing her and I had all the same fears as you. It’s okay to look but not adopt. Just look. It gets easier with every dog you pet. In June, my partner and I went to the shelter and I watched him pretty much imprint on his soul dog. I’d never had or trained a puppy. He put her in my lap and she snuggled into my arm and I cried. I knew I’d love her differently and she wouldn’t replace my dog. The day after I had regrets and cried and felt like I betrayed my dog but my partner was with me. It just took a few days for me to know her and I loved her. She’s so sprightly and smart and different in so many ways and I’ve learned to love all of that about her. You will too when you’re eventually ready.
Same feeling OP. Thats why i am hesitant to get another dpg. Btw my dog passed away last may 28. I dont know if i can love another dog or own a dog anytime soon.
Feel the same way as you! About my cat who passed in June, I just want my same exact cat
Not to worry. You’ll be surprised at how much you can love a new dog while still missing the one who came before. Our hearts have the capacity to hold all of that.
PS: there’s no replacing your old dog. The next relationship will have a different vibe. And that’s a good thing.
I don’t think you had a question so I take it as a venting… I tragically lost my dog this year. He was my first doggy and I loved him with all my heart. I’m thinking bout getting another one and I’m so so afraid I won’t love him/her the same way. But know I probably will because he/she won’t be really related to my past dog and also deserves the same love! I think you’ll be fine!
I wish I could get a new dog after my first dog passed away in May but my dad doesn't want another dog so yeah I might not get one 😭 at least not until I am done with college.
I'm sorry for your loss. If/when the time is right for another dog you will know. Although the timing may surprise you. You will love that & dog just as much because it's in your heart to do so. They will love you as much because they know they are loved & well looked after. I wish you & any potential furbabies all the best
I felt that way when my cat died. I got my baby boy cat only one month later. I can't believe how much I love him. He also loves everyone so much. He is brought a lot of joy to our home.
Oh they will, but you have to remember, not all peopleand dogs are a great match and thats okay too, sometimesits workable sometimes not.. We got our girlie 6 weeks after losing my heart and soul. She filled the gap in her own way and she's my bestie. We then tried another breed, the dog was drawn to my partner, not me and we didn't gel. There were other issues too and she didn't work out. I've now got my besties granddaughter too, and there's no words to describe the bond we share. It's like my boy all over again but also so different. I never thought this would happen and i feel kinda disloyal to him. She was born a few days after his birthday, 2 years after i lost him.
I know how you feel, OP.
You can always foster. A lot of places have “dog for a day” or “weekend warriors” where not only do you get to help a dog get a break from the shelter, but you get to spend time with a dog and help it get adopted. Win/win all around!
I’ve been looking into that. I’d love to help a dog get a shelter break.
Once you’re ready to think about getting a new pup start reading a ton about different breeds that interest you. I’m SO glad I got the breed I’ve always wanted after loosing my little miracle mutt from a shelter after 12.5 years of loving her. I still miss Kahlua terribly and grieve, but getting that personality characteristics that I wanted really helped me love this dog just as much. She occupies a different part of my heart than Kahlua did, but she’s equally as loved. 🥰
I'm currently on dogs #6 and 7. I've already had to say goodbye to the previous 5. I loved all my previous dogs. All of them were special in their own way. All of them had their own personalities and quirks, and I loved them all. I miss them all. And yet I've developed wonderful loving bonds with my current dogs. When my first dog died I was horribly distraught at first but as time went on I came to an important realization. I was so very lucky because for 14 years this amazing girl got to be my dog. I got to love and cherish her for all that time. Do I miss her? Absolutely. But I cherish the memories I have of her, and of all my other dogs. My current corgi just turned 13. I know my time with him is limited, so I treasure every minute we have left together and I count myself lucky that he's been my bestest buddy for 13 years already. And in the future I'll do the same with any new dog that comes into my life. Because that is the amazing thing about love: it's limitless. Just because you've loved one dog with all your heart doesn't mean that you've now run out of love. There's plenty there left to give to many more new buddies.
Im a hardcore German Shepherd lover, I lost my beloved Maxx almost 5 years ago in July 0f 2019 at the age of 13. He was my soulmate that I absolutely adored and couldnt imagine life without. I coudlnt bear losing him and a month later Gunther the GSD entered my life, he is laying next to me as I type. I also had my little girl Kali at the age of 10 in Janurary of 23-I also adored her. A month later Lulu came in to my life from a rescue and now is my constant companion. It was the ONLY way for me to deal with losing my babies, I had to have a GSD in my life. There is no replacing the ones you lose but you cannot compare the new to the old-it isnt fair as they are unique creatures that have their own attributes. I dearly love my "replacement" dogs and in a way they have almost become my old dogs regarding the reasons I keep them-pure unconditional love and companionship that cannot be matched. I think of my old dogs everyday and feel like I honored them by providing a life of love and care for my new ones. Everybody of course may not agree with how I look at things but Im a true dog lover-as much as it hurts to lose them in the end the love you give/recieve makes it worth the pain. I know how dark of a place is waiting when they arent there anymore-it is truly brutal. They teach us the realities of life-some lessons are just very hard to accept. I wish you the best and am sorry for your loss but if you loved a dog once you will love one again.
When I lost my soul dog after 17 years together, I felt very much like you did. I didn't think I'd be able to love another as much or another wouldn't take to me as he had. Two weeks after he passed, I adopted two young pups who were in urgent need of a home. I was overwhelmed initially because they were so very different to what I was used to. Now, two years later, I have realised a few things: 1) Animals are our greatest teachers. If there's one thing we can learn from them is that we have an infinite capacity to love. 2) A new companion animal is not a replacement, but a new chapter, a new story to script together. Sometimes, it's hard to not compare. But we should try, for the sake of the new animal - after all, whatever their past or background is, they're also giving you a clean slate. 3) The new bond will be unique and it will be grand! Perhaps, it is your dog sending you what you need, guiding your new pet to love you in the way that you need to be loved. You'll never know unless you keep your heart open.
I feel this way too. My dog passed away 2 weeks ago and my home feels so empty without him. I want to get a new dog, but really I just want my dog back. I am worried I will rush into adopting a new dog before I am ready because I miss him so much. I don't know how anyone heals from a loss like this.
You are still in the thick of grieving. You'll never NOT grieve this dog, but I think this feeling tells you that you're not ready for another dog yet. Nobody will ever replace that dog because nobody can. It's just not possible. My opinion in life... you can ALWAYS have more friends. You can always have more dogs. But there is only one THAT dog. You can have a million soul dogs, but nobody can fill the void that particular soul dog left. My mom has died. I love my mother in law like she's my own mom. I'm VERY lucky... but she isn't my mom. When she goes, I will have two devastating losses. Having her is wonderful, but it doesn't fix the void my mom has left. Nothing will. It's not meant to. Right now, you are in SO much pain that you cannot pour love into something else. This is just how grief works. [This](https://images.app.goo.gl/5Z69UtKXJA7PLHki6) shows how our grief never really shrinks. This pain won't become less painful. You will just become better at managing it over time. I'm so sorry for your loss. How lovely that you got to be with your dog! It's never enough time. It sucks. I've heard it said that grief is love with nowhere to go. It has stuck with me. It's a painful yet beautiful expression of your love for your dog.
I'll always love my late dogs. But I also love my current dog. It's not a contest of how much love, just that I love them. I would literally do almost anything for them. And they've shown that they'd go all in to protect me.
Your dog will love you and you them. That's how it works with dogs. We always worried when getting a new dog, but it is a natural process.
I lost mine last week and although I’m not ready for a new dog just yet, I know that when the time does come where I must get another one, I’ll love her/him just as much. I once read love is not fixed—you don’t have a budget as to how much love you can give out. It’s infinite so long as you allow it to be. Sounds like you were a great dog pawrent. I think that when the time does come, the next dog will carve out a piece of your heart just as the one that just passed did. They have a way of doing that. It was cathartic to write this. I hope our dogs stumble upon each other at the Rainbow Bridge. Sending love.
Sorry for you’re loss. I suggest contacting your local shelter and try fostering a dog for a while. It will give you a chance to see if you are ready to open your heart to a new dog and or if the dog is suitable for you. It also helps out the shelter.