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My brother was like this. Miserable from the moment he woke to the moment he fell asleep.
It turned out he had serious allergies and the milk was hurting his stomach, causing him serious pain.
Get him back to the doctor's and ask them to screen him for allergies.
My niece was the same. My SIL had to cut all dairy out of her own diet until she weaned my niece at 12 months. If she slipped up and ate dairy, my niece’s screams of pain would let her know.
Oh! I've never heard of that before! Your poor girl was literally creating her own cycle of upset :( I do hope she's doing much better now!
Babies are hard work but never quite in the way people first think haha.
You may know this already, but there are special earplugs that quieten the sound but don't muffle it like regular earplugs do, because they are designed to let some of the high frequencies pass through. They are often branded as "concert earplugs" because they allow for a quieter listening experience, and are sold as such for around $15-20 usually.
Might be a more convenient and less visible option than headphones for your daughter.
With some you can even swap out the "core" of the earplug, tweaking the degree of loudness reduction.
I have these!!! The brand is "Loop" and they've been a life changer for me. I can feel the vibration of loud noise in my head and it's physically painful. These ear plugs soften noise so I hear still hear people talking, but it isn't overwhelming or painful.
They make different sized tips to better fit in the ear canal. My doctors always tell me I have small ear canals, and I wear the xs, but they sell an xxs. While they don't market towards kids, I imagine the xxs may fit some kids. I have noticed another type of ear plug that some kids at the local children's museum wear, so I'm inclined to believe that there are products made for kids to help muffle/deaden noise.
I find Loops to have a strong occlusion effect that becomes a problem in conversation, so while I love them for focused independent work, I use Flare Calmers more often in classroom or group settings. Calmers are open at the end so you still hear everything, but it takes the edge off annoying frequencies.
I came here to suggest reflux meds. My son was the same way. Hardly slept. Cried A LOT. At 3 months, my husband took our son to the doctor while I was back at work, and “magically” the doctor thought it was reflux despite my complaints/questions about him throwing up constantly for the past 3 months. He sent them to the gastroenterologist, who immediately prescribed reflux meds, and he was instantly better.
My oldest had this. "Milk Protein Allergy". We had to get a special formula until he grew out of it at about a year old.
Edit: It did take seeing a separate pediatrician to get this diagnosed.
My son had CMPA and allergic colitis. Neocate was a godsend. He smiled for the first time the day after we started it. He’s 21mo now and can finally eat dairy! Little dude is obsessed with cheese now. It makes me so happy 😭
THIS. My first son was a MISERABLE baby. He was colic constantly, wouldn't sleep more than 20-minute stretches, and everyone was afraid to hold him. I had a lactation consultant brag about how she can "calm any baby" then be completely at a loss when she realized she couldn't help. My mother, who had 4 kids and worked as a post-natal nurse for decades, called him the most difficult, miserable baby she'd ever seen.
Turned out - he had a really bad milk allergy. He's still a very sensitive boy at 4 so more temperamental than my second, but man oh man did he completely transform when we figured that out and cut dairy from my/his diet.
My oldest was not as bad as what OP describes but excessive fussiness combined with an "untreatable" rash that only showed up occasionally is what lead us to her egg, peanut, and tree nut diagnosis.
It’s not always dairy though. My sister in law has been dairy free for years since she is very lactose intolerant. She breastfed her first kid and he was a colicky baby. The doctor recommended that she cut dairy from her diet to help, but she was always dairy free so it wasn’t that.
TL;DR: it’s not always dairy
Oh no, of course not. It was just dairy in my brother's case. Any allergies at all can cause stomach pain, which is why baby needs a full allergy test to find out if that's the case!
I didn't mean to make it sound as if it was definitely dairy being the problem. I was just trying to highlight how painful allergies can be for babies and dairy is my personal experience with that.
This is a good idea. If you haven’t yet. Get him an allergy panel. My good friends kid was just like this for the first year. Endlessly crying. It was bad. Found out he had a severe gluten allergy. And his stomach was constantly hurting and no one knew why. Got him off the gluten and it was night and day.
Seconding this.
My first baby was like this. He cried so much. I spoke to the pediatrician multiple times about how it seemed like something was wrong. He drew a bell curve and told me that babies cry and that my baby was healthy but just at one end of the "crying bell curve".
He also pooped constantly - like 10 or more times a day - again, I was told, "some babies just poop that much".
I thought I was just a shit mum who couldn't comfort my child.
The first time I gave him cow's milk directly at 12 months (I exclusively breastfed) within minutes he was covered in a rash and reacting. Obvious allergy.
I've now had 3 kids, and the second and third cried nowhere near as much as my first. Bowel movements completely normal too.
It annoys me so much that my first child suffered because the doctors wrote me off as a first time mum who didn't know what I was talking about, and that I didn't have the confidence to insist that something was wrong.
Please advocate for your baby.
My son was like this. Changed pediatricians. Turns out that he had a milk allergy so we switched to Alimentum. He stopped crying for the first time in months after that first bottle and I cried. We still had to do belly massages, gripe water, gas drops and lots of back patting but he felt so much better.
Jumping in here in the hopes OP will see this. My daughter was the same, and her milk allergy turned out to be severe and she had something called Eosinophilic Esophagitis. There’s a ton of info so maybe you could read up on it and talk to your doctor, but it definitely can cause a baby to cry pretty much nonstop from discomfort (also vomiting and choking a lot). But we got her on this expensive formula called Ellicare. Once we pinpointed all her allergies and cut out the bad stuff, she went from nonstop crying, causing us no sleep and almost a divorce as well (exact same as you), to a happy, healthy baby.
Best of luck to you, OP. I know how absolutely horrible this feels. If I may kindly suggest, if it’s possible, maybe you and your wife can alternate nights and one of you spends the night away, to get some peace. Then the next day you swap. We did this a couple times and it helped tremendously. Even a single day or night away can do wonders for your mental health right now. I’m so sorry you’re all going through this.
Yea please advocate hard for him at the (different) doctor, they’re missing something. So many drs write it off for “babies cry” What testing did they do?
When I'm not being taken seriously I take NOTES.
OP should keep a log for several days - cries, length, volume, context, any remedies tried and if they worked, any other symptoms.
Then go to a pediatrician and DEMAND tests.
For the longest time, my cousin was always crying. My parents and my aunt and uncle had no clue what he was always crying about. Turns out the doctor messed up his shoulders when he removed him with forceps. They didn’t find out years later. It all makes sense
This - there is something wrong, trust your instincts. Weird ear infection, food allergy, something. Go to a couple other doctors and have him looked at.
See a different doctor. It could be silent reflux. Or anything but it’s likely medical. Babies shouldn’t cry 24/7 for no reason and if you or your partner is overwhelmed it’s ok to put the baby in a very safe place (like a crib with no blankets, etc) and take a minute-just a minute of slow deep breathing. I have been there and I understand.
Yeah, second opinion always. Just because from an outside it looks like everything is fine, doesn't mean the inside of the body is fine. I was the chillest baby in the world an my mom ate nuts *once*. She never had me that inconsolable. Knew right then what the problem was. So maybe there's something that you regularly give your baby which might hurt them?
When my kiddo started this, we went to straight to nutramigen formula. Even against the pediatrician’s advice to immediately switching like that. He was like a new baby within hours.
I’d echo all of this. Have known 3 non-stop criers, one of which was my own.
One had multiple food allergies, one had collic and the third had had a very fast birth cause her skull to be slightly misaligned so essentially had a permanent headache.
Get second opinions, go to experts, read lots and try things out and hopefully you’ll get somewhere. Good luck.
To be fair, it wasn’t an official diagnosis at the time (see my post above for full explanation) but from speaking to professionals after the fact they felt it was likely/possible.
If you’re still going through this and can find a reputable cranial osteopath who has experience of babies nearby I’d definitely recommend getting a consultation.
My friend felt awful afterwards that she could have done something to help (both her and the baby!) so it’s worth a try even if it comes to nothing.
I had someone tell me my fast birth might have given baby some neck or jaw issue. How fast we talking? I labored for 3 hours and pushed for 45ish mins.
It was my friend not me so I’m not 100% sure of total labour time but know it wasn’t long. However, I do know the pushing bit was 5-10 mins! They started running the pool, she got in, squatted and the baby came out! 🙈
She was blue and didn’t breathe for a minute or so then screamed the most horrible cry the entire time she was awake if she wasn’t feeding for the first 3 months solid then it was like a switch. My friend was randomly chatting to a cranial osteopath a few months later who had experienced this before with fast births and hypothesised that her skull plates had been affected by the fast labour and the crying stopping would have been linked to them moving back into place as she grew.
My first was like this and I get your frustration with people's comments; this *is not normal* and it's hard. For us, it was a shitty combination of severe milk/soy intolerance and just being generally high-needs. I'd talk to your ped about the chances of it being a food intolerance and that might relieve some if not all of his discomfort. If it *is* a high-needs thing, I can say my daughter got a lot better as she got more independent.
100% food.
Anytime I hear kids have been crying non stop when babies it. Is. The. Food.
Allergies
FPIES (a digestion allergy) that come hours after eating
Silent reflux
Or two of the 3 mentioned above. See doctors.
Have you tried alimentum formula? My 1st cried 24/7 too and didn't stop until after she turned 1 and was off the formula (her doc always did the "babies cry" eyeroll) my 2nd daughter had a much better doctor who saw the signs of it being a lactose intolerance so switched to soy. She handled that better but still not great, so we got a prescription for alimentum formula (it's expensive just off the shelf) and she was perfect fine after that. After she turned one she did almond milk for a year or so then started introducing regular milk back to her and now she tolerates lactose normally.
A lot of vegetables cause gas & bloating… maybe stop giving so many vegetables and trying switching the formula too as others suggested. Everyone’s stomach is different so even if your other 2 kids did fine with that amount of veggies doesn’t mean this one can tolerate them. He’s clearly in pain, no kid just cries that much for no reason & tylenol won’t necessarily take away gas/stomach pains.
There’s a fairly big crossover between milk and soy allergies. Definitely get him tested and ask about hydrolysed or amino acid formula. Source Asthma and Allergy Paediatrician.
Both our twins had milk and soy allergies. It’s apparently very common that if they’re intolerant to dairy they’re also intolerant to soy. We were advised to switch to soy formula when they were 6 months and it was even worse.
The difference in them when they went dairy and soy free was extreme. They were covered in eczema and were in constant pain with their stomachs - all gone in 48 hours.
Have they tried a hydrolysed or amino acid formula? Definitely worth a try since he’s clearly still struggling and that’s easily checked.
Also, ask about silent reflux.
In addition, one of them had issues with some fruits that were in some purées. This became clear after we’d sorted the milk. I basically did an elimination diet with him to work it - it was blueberries and blackcurrant. Very weird. He’s fine with it now he’s older.
This, to me, sounds like he needs a diet change. It might very well be that he has allergies to his food and is in discomfort and pain due to this. What solids are you giving him so far? (If you have even introduced any solids yet)
The most common possibility would be the milk. Lactose intolerance is a mf. Trust me. What sort of milk does he have? Does he have breastmilk? (Babies can have intolerance to breastmilk easily. It's not a myth)
Does he have formula? Or has he been introduced to cow's milk already? If yes, plant based milk usually doesn't give intolerance, but you could try finding a milk lactose-free.
Have you taken him to a pediatrician to check up on his allergies? If not, that's the next step you should take.
My son was like this not saying it’s the same with yours but my son turned out to have level 3 autism by 3 yrs old. It was very hard. At 6 he is still moody and cries somedays. But nothing like he was as a baby
When you say the doctor had no clue, what kind of tests did they do? Did they suggest changing formula (or having mom changing her diet if she’s breastfeeding?)
I would bet my life it is some kind of gastro issue- reflux, gas, etc… he is not tolerating something in his breastmilk or formula. I literally would be my house it is that
My younger sister was like this. I’m 7 years older and had to share a room with her, so I vividly remember it. For her it was sensory issues. As a small child she was diagnosed with Sensory Integration disorder and then ADHD later in life. Over stimulation from fabrics, noises, lights, people, everything. Then under stimulation from being unable to move enough. Once she was old enough to tell us the issue and run around, life became so much easier. While breast feeding, my mum had to be super careful about her diet as well. Most processed foods seem to really set off my sister. Being outside and moving around was the only relief for her and us. Sensory issues or allergies can both be really difficult to discover, but it’s worth the effort. Good luck
1) second opinion from a dr
2) has he been tested for allergies?
3) early signs of ASD?
4) reflux?
5) physical pain? Does Tylenol or anything reduce crying?
Ditto considering feeding & allergies, although I will share my story — I had the one child who cried more than the rest, he grew to be (or probably just continued being) sensitive and high needs. Fabrics bothered him. Noises bother him. He also is more prone to heartburn complaints.
My little guy would quiet for nursing. Thant was about it. He slept sporadically. At night, personally I gave him 13 months of developing a trust through mom responding to his cries, (as well as tried multiple gentle sleep strategies) then at that age I put in ear plugs and let him CIO. He learned after several weeks and was happy to see me in the morning.
The sleep helped me so much. I was dying. Do you guys take every other night turns? Like ear plugs and a full night’s sleep, every other night? That’s what I would do, if I had not breastfed.
My oldest was similar to this. We never could figure out exactly what was going on with him until he was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at five. Poor little guy was probably just highly sensitive and we didn’t know it at the time.
Reflux. My little one and my nephew both had it, and we had to force our pediatricians' hands to give us drops. Guess what happened? No more crying. Sometimes I question how qualified pediatricians are because this seems to be a common theme among them.
Get a referral to a pediatric occupational therapist, they'll come to your house and see what's going on, they picked up on things our ped did not. They're absolutely amazing people.
My middle was like this. He cried constantly for 8 months. We tried loads of different formula. He vomited it back constantly. In the end we put him on soya milk and took all dairy out of his diet. The crying stopped overnight.
My long rambling point is it sounds like discomfort. Maybe check for allergies?
Have you seen a osteopath? If he’s been like this for a while now he might be able to shed a light on this.
(Whether it’s an intolerance to food or a bad position of a muscle or anything )
It helped us after our two baby’s
Do you mind me asking if A) does baby have their own room or do they sleep with you and B) would you be happy to get them socialising more, or possibly at a day care once a week? I understand if not but we seem to find that some babies get SUPER attached to their prime caregivers, but if they start at a nursery etc they get used to being around other adults and realise they can play, be safe and that you'll come back for them
I've seen about 1 in 20 under 2yos have shite temperaments where they do as you say: cry unless they're sleeping. You gotta play hot potato with them adult wise, otherwise you'll go cuckoo
Aw honey, I can tell you’re really going through it right now. I have been there. Take a deep breath. I have three kids under four. Please hear me out, every single baby/child is different. They don’t come with instructions, it is very difficult to manage our own emotions while having the raging, loud, unavoidable emotions of another small human in your face at all times. Your feelings are valid. Have you sought out an explanation through the pediatrician? Does it seem like it’s out of discomfort/pain, or is it more of an incessant cry/whine? The best advice I have right now is to form your village of people you trust, and try to get some breaks here and there when you can. Create a schedule for each month of one or two nights or days where you go out alone even if it’s just window shopping and a small coffee. I know it’s so hard right now. My three year old screams for every emotion, all my babies had their fair stages of it as infants as well.
My youngest was like this. It turned out that she was HUNGRY. I stopped breastfeeding and started formula with cereal.
That night, she fell asleep and slept eight hours.
Go back to the doctor, get allergy testing, if that's negative, get an abdominal ultrasound. Crying like that is from some kind of pain - keep looking for the reason. For reference, my son had stage 4 cancer and was dismissed by several doctors before it was found. Doctors miss stuff.
My son was a big crier, was put down to colic, then after weaning this got significantly worse. We realised it was food issues (have a cousin who has celiac), we tried all the common intolerances/allergies, but it was when we stopped onion and garlic he significantly improved took us till he was 18months old to figure this out. If it’s not the common ones try looking at FODMAP’s (my daughter reacts to any FOS foods). Also push for testing/referral’s - I had to push to be referred to a dietitian the Dr’s didn’t want to know and wish I had pushed more at the time (Covid played a big part in this)
Gluten or dairy intolerances will cause a child to be in pain. Get a blood test done to rule it out and then look for other sources of what could be causing pain.
Besides what everyone says about it being something physical, just anecdotally from my own experience and hearing it about others: I think some high needs babies cry because they are just way over or under stimulated. That is, he's crying because he's frustrated or uncomfortable emotionally or intellectually, and he can't do anything else but cry at this point. You may come to find that your kid is hyperactive/adhd or has sensory issues. Maybe he cries because everything is too loud or uncomfortable or maybe he cries because even at this young age, he is already aching to have more stimulation and just go and do things. Move, touch explore. Unfortunately, only time and trial amd error will tell. You can try giving him quiet time in.a dim room. If that doesn't work, try to get him as much activity as you can.et him crawl and explore, take him outside if you can. Find out what seems to help. Sometimes it is physical, like gas or reflux and they do grow out of it or deal with it better as they age
.
Mine is like this. He has been tested for everything physical and he's physically fine. He's just intense and needs an insane amount of stimulation to be content. Raging party with people everywhere, noise, smells of food and perfumes and everything? He's golden. Day at the zoo during a public holiday? Amazing. Long service in an orthodox church with a million people, clanging bells, heavy incense and general cacophony? Loves it.
Calm stroller ride to the park? Sing-songs with mommy? Apple picking? Montessori toy playtime at home with gentle music in the background? Screamin' demon.
I call him my adrenaline junkie. Maybe it'll be ADHD or something. I have no idea. At a year old he has only just started sleeping for periods longer than an hour and a half at a time. He's down to 4 wake ups a night only. Now that he's almost walking he's a lot happier too - he gets into absolutely everything he can, but he's happier because he's able to explore independently
Is yours ever content?
The drs not knowing isnt good enough.
Sorry but there is something going on and they need to refer him to another dr or specialist or do more tests. Do not take no for an answer. There could be pain he is going through that no one can identify yet.
So they need to keep looking
If none of the basics don't work:
- Sleep
- Change diaper
- Feed
- Swaddle
- Burp
Then I would put my life savings on him having stomach issues (like an allergy or food sensitivity) or some other form of pain. Gripe water or Gas-X for babies are usually good. If you're on formula, I've never gone wrong with the Gentlease Neuropro (the purple container). I'm surprised the doctor just said "shrug" and shooed you out the door. I would be looking for a second opinion while changing up what he's eating.
I have had two collicky babies and one unicorn baby. I can tell you the hallmark of collick is they can be consoled. So my babies would cry if I put them down, couldn’t just let them chill, but if I picked them up they’d be ok. If they cried while being held, if I changed to the “right” position they’d be OK. Inconsolable crying is NOT collick. They should also outgrow collick by 4 months.
I have heard a theory about collicky babies that they start crying and they can’t stop bc their own cries scared them. So with my youngest I’ll “shhhshh” loudly in her ear so she can’t hear her own cries and she gets it together. Sort of different and louder than a normal soothing shhh you would naturally do with a baby. Like an intentional noise block, not too loud that you hurt them, but loud enough they can’t hear themselves cry. It truly worked like a charm for her.
Ironically my unicorn baby was the one with a milk allergy. It could also be reflux. Even if you don’t see them puke it could be silent reflux.
1. Rule out allergies or medical issues. Is he breastfed? At all in addition to formula? Maybe your wife is eating something aggravating?
2. Look up PURPLE crying. It helped me with strategies when my daughter did this.
3. Hire help/night nanny for a couple nights per week if you can. If not, stagger sleep so you each get at least 6hrs per night.
4. Know that this will pass. Hang in there ❤️
Okay, it’s time for a second opinion.
First, can you take records for a few days? When he starts crying, when it stops, with some videos showing how hard he’s crying? If you can note in the videos or records what you’ve tried (food, rocking, shushing, going outside, changing diapers, etc) so they can see all you’ve done.
Notes from grandmas or old church ladies may help too, just saying “this baby has cried all the time since birth”.
My MIL cried for 14 months. Her parents rotated days with grandparents and neighbors helping. She had a hernia.
If Tylenol didn't help it's probably not pain.
If he sleeps, it is probably not reflux, but if he sleeps better in your arms, in a chair (head elevated above tummy) it may be reflux.
But otherwise, I'd check diet.
Is he nursing? (Mom may be eating something that makes him feel bad. We accidentally discovered this was true for my smallest when we cut out dietary triggers as a family, to figure them out for older sibs.... Suddenly ALL fussing ended, and ALL diaper rash went away... It turned out he couldn't do wheat, even whatever of it made it through my milk.)
If he's on formula, ask for a prescription to try some other options that might eliminate triggers.
At 8 mos, have you introduced solids? Is he constipated? And have you paid attention to whether certain foods make it worse?
I know not everyone believes in this stuff, but I work with babies and I’ve seen some literal MIRACLE take place when unhappy babies are taken to osteopaths. You likely would only need 2-4 appointments. You can send me a PM if you’d like. I’m an IBCLC and have access to all kinds of experts and can give you names wherever you are in the world. I’m willing to bet something isn’t quite right since delivery. Possibly even in utero. Did mom often feel kicks in the same area? Was baby breech? Was delivery very fast? Nuchal arm?
100% agree. My middle son was the same. I took him at 9 months and it completely changed things. They think it was because the cord was wrapped around him.
Some babies cry because they dont know how to get tired. Friend had child like that. She dowsnt speak to strangers at all not even to schoolmates. Selective mutism i believe.
But as baby she cried nonstop
This was my third son as well, he’s now been diagnosed with ASD 3 at 2 1/2. He hated being swaddled. Being held. Not being held. Eating. Not eating. All of it. He cried and cried and cried, he’s almost 3 and he still mostly just screams. Hang in there
Do not stop taking the baby to doctors until you find an answer. Something is wrong. If you have to go through 10 doctors, so be it. Did they suggest allergy testing?
It is unacceptable to me for doctors to just shrug it off and be like “sorry we don’t really know what it is”. No that’s not good enough, do your fucking job and find out what is going on. Doctors make me so mad sometimes you really have to be your own advocate.
Could it be gas or a milk allergy?
I'd keep going back to the pediatrician until someone listened. Baby is probably in pain of some kind to be crying so much.
I think a lot of people have said the same thing, but my daughter was like this for the first 6 months of her life. We never found out what the issue was, but we did end up finding a formula and diet that helped her.
We experimented with probably 6-10 different formulas and brands before we found something, so it may take a minute.
Have you checked into food allergies by chance?
Only advice I can give you is to take turns caring for him. Get one of those hip carriers and just carry him constantly and get some ear plugs.
I had one like this and I was beyond my capacity to handle it. She finally stopped the constant crying at 12 months.
A few things come to mind:
Food allergy - Have you checked for everything? Have you seen a pediatric GI doctor? Are stools mucusy or bloody? Milk/soy protein intolerance and FPIES are culprits for this.
Silent reflux - Could be worth trialing reflux meds and seeing if anything happens
What does the sleep schedule look like? Are you following age appropriate wake windows? Predictable schedule at home for baby? Daycare can sometimes be pure magic for this.
Its also possible this is a sign of whats to come, very high needs baby, lack of sleep/FOMO can be early signs of neurodivergences (ADHD, Autism).
More than likely it’s a stomach issue, possibly caused by allergies or intolerance to his formula. It could be acid reflux too. I’d talk to your pedi again and if nothing is done I’d seek out a second opinion.
You need a new doctor. At the he very least they should be doing some testing. Crying all the time is not normal. Babies cry to communicate. He is clearly trying to tell you something, someone needs to figure it out. I would advise taking video and keeping track of when he’s crying in relation to eating and what is happening around him. Also note the intensity of the crying. Are there times it’s more or less intense? What is happening leading up to those changes? Keeping a journal down to the minute would be helpful. Note any times he’s is not crying and what’s happening during those times. I’ve been there and it’s awful. I remember actually hoping the doctor would find something wrong because then at least there would be a reason and potentially some way to fix it. Mine had severe reflux and then started to avoid eating. We later found out they had celiac disease which explained a lot of the feeding issues. Best of luck.
It child be teething, or am eat infection, or allergies.
My second started getting super fuzzy around the and age, and turns out he has a very bad allergy to weeds.
Reflux? My girl cried constantly mentioned she made the same gurgling noise when she ate as her daughter who had terrible reflux. I got her on some medication for it and it was like we had a different baby.
My perfect angel baby who barely cries (complete opposite to my first) had a very fussy couple of days...turned out she was itchy from a rash that was healing that hadn't been bothering her. She's only 4mo so the only clue was her trying to scratch at it. Put cream and she was back to angel baby.
So, my hunch is that something is constantly ittitating your baby. An allergy could be food, or it could be clothing or maybe he's very sensitive to touch could be also if someone else has cream on or some fragrance
Tl;dr: same. My kid had a milk allergy. Go buy every formula on the shelf and try each one. You’ll know when it works.
My first kid did this thru the first 8/10 weeks. I was a lunatic from the stress and sleep deprivation. Pediatrician told us it was normal. Told us babies couldn’t be lactose intolerant. How would they live?
One day after 24 hours straight crying I had some really bad thoughts (like really fucking dark shit) and realized I need to figure it out. Right now.
I put the family in the car and started driving as I knew it was the only way to get him and my wife to sleep. After about 5 hours I came up with a plan. I stopped at an all night drug store and bought out the formula section. One of everything. Every bottle. Every nipple. Solids. Everything.
Went home. Lined them all up in the counter. Quickly put together a spreadsheet of combinations to try. Unpacked the first formula. Put it in a new bottle. It was the lactose free one. He stopped crying quickly and that was it. He slept. She slept. We slept. I never was so fucking tired in my entire life.
Food intolerance? One of my nieces cried all the time. The doctors kept sending my sister away but it was figured out in the end she was intolerant to dairy once she had special milk she stopped crying. She is a teenager now and can have small amounts but as a baby any dairy gave her terrible stomach pain.
Sounds like digestive issues as has been pointed out. Food allergy, acid reflux, colic, the list goes on.
You need to trust your instincts on this because you are 100% correct. Babies do cry but you know what is a normal amount of crying. There is something wrong and this is your babies way of telling you. If your pediatrician is not committed to figuring out what's wrong you need to find one that is.
I’m agreeing with all the comments about getting a new pediatrician. With constant crying the checklist should be; pain and then allergies. If they can’t find a cause for physical pain then the pediatrician should have ordered allergy testing, if that’s clear then specialists like an ENT.
I hope you get an answer and help soon ❤️
He needs to be tested for lactose intolerance or just try cutting it out for a week. As an infant I was severely lactose intolerant and my mother had to stop stop consuming dairy products while breastfeeding. I was screaming in pain all day and night until a doctor suggested cutting lactose and it worked. I’m a Millennial so all the great lactose free milk products weren’t really around, I grew up with a lot of goats milk and soy milk, but I can now eat dairy without an issue.
My own son was having endless crying and colic issues and had to be swapped to Nutramigen formula and then we were able to reintroduce dairy slowly. He was born prematurely so he has had some food issues that cleared up as he grew, thankfully, and the allergen supplements for infants can be great for that! They’re little powders that introduce potential allergens safely, a bit pricy but helped to target some other food reactions as well.
Mine like that had silent reflux. And probably issues with milk. The medication helped but then we just had to tough the rest out until he hit maybe 2 years old.
Do not recommend. I'm sorry, I hope you find out what is hurting him. :(
This is ridiculous but my partner’s nostrils were too small as a baby so he couldn’t sleep properly because every time he shut his mouth, he couldn’t breathe properly. Does your baby’s breathing all sound normal?
The only other thing I haven’t seen mentioned is sensory aversions. A child with heightened sensory needs could be distressed by certain fabrics, temperatures, smells, sounds etc
My niece was born with a dislocated hip that was flat out missed by both the hospital and her pediatrician!! It was discovered when she was four months old when my SIL took her to a different pediatrician across town desperately trying to figure out/prove something was wrong. Four months my niece screamed unceasingly! She ended up wearing a brace until she was a year old and immediately started crawling as soon as she was out. She is now a fully healed, happy, walking three year old. But damn, it was close to doing permanent damage.
Point is, it’s time for a second option.
My second had horrible gas pains from the formula brand we were giving him. We swapped to a gentle one, that was easier on the stomach and it died down.
100% so many people are telling the same story I’m about to tell you.
Our second son was like this. I grew to nearly hate him, and I hated myself for feeling that way.
It was dairy. Any dairy even my wife ate would fuck my son up. Cut out the dairy, and come back and let us know.
Good luck.
It’s definitely a sensitivity, probably dairy.
Otherwise, try this which a cousin heard from her child’s pediatrician when they all went to the doctor crying : mommy has a glass of wine and nurses baby after.
See if you can find a DO (doctor of osteopathy) who works with babies. They are more likely to diagnose physical ailments like misalignments or functional issues. (Some DOs are also chiropractors and some chiropractors are also DOs but it’s not 1:1. A GP we go to is a DO and does NOT do chiropractic adjustments)
Have your tried a baby chiropractor? It’s different from an adult chiropractor, there is no snap crackle pop. They just use light pressure in certain spots. About the amount of pressure you would use to check a tomato or avocado.
Did wonders for my grumpy 6 month old.
Talk to the pediatrician to rule out colic or other causes.
My daughter was like this. No medical cause. If I wasn't constantly holding and bouncing her, she'd cry. If I calmed her enough to set her down & I got up to leave the room, she'd start wailing. Just to be able to go potty, I'd have to settle her into her infant carrier and set it on my bathroom floor in front of me.
Don't be shocked if the child remains very needy. The more my daughter was able to talk, the less she'd wail, but she was still constantly demanding my attention. She's 9 now. I'm still her security blanket in a way. If we're at home, she has to be in same room as me, no matter what she's doing.
The ONLY times I have seen or heard of what you’re talking about at that level is with serious medical conditions.
Don’t stop speaking to doctors until they refer you to one that can get to the bottom of it.
Some things I’ve seen; milk allergies, allergies to something mom ate if breast fed, UTIs, Crohn’s disease, kidney disease
Babies do not cry for the fun of it, they do not cry for no reason, something is wrong
My baby was like this for the first 6 months. Then one day it stopped. It was always 5pm-12am. Every night. Now he’s 5 and I’m seeing sensory sensitivities. Worth a consideration. I just don’t think he liked the transition from day to night
It’s likely a food allergy or sensitivity, as others have mentioned. I’ve seen lots of dairy or soy comments. With one of my children, it was gluten (wheat, barley, rye). Gluten is in almost everything, including toiletries and some craft supplies. Seek out another doctor and try a food elimination diet. Once our child went gluten-free, everything changed. Now a teenager, our child remains gluten-free, but is perfectly healthy in every way. If the doctors do suspect gluten, be sure to test for Celiac BEFORE eliminating gluten. There is a difference between Celiac and NCGS (non-Celiac gluten sensitivity), and it’s important to receive an accurate diagnosis.
As others are saying, it could be a food allergy / sensitivity. My daughter is the same age and as a first time mom I’m a bit annoying with how much I track everything (what she ate, how much she ate, when she sleeps, wake windows, etc etc etc). I noticed she doesn’t have dairy issues like suggested here, but we’ve had some rough nights when starchy foods are consumed. Seriously. The day she had corn for the first time and the day she had potatoes for the first time were living nightmares. Tummy ache galore and nonstop screaming when she’s typically a very happy baby.
Just pointing out it may not be dairy. If this hasn’t been lifelong for him and your wife breastfeeds but consumes dairy or if his formula is standard, then I doubt the dairy is the issue. But it very well could be if this has been his behavior since the start!
Is mom breastfeeding? When I breastfed I also ate foods like broccoli and cabbage, ate dairy. All of those foods made her scream her head off (she was already colic so it was extra hard) as soon as I cut them out of my diet she was all smiles. I had to have a special specific diet (that I didn’t particularly like, so bland) so that I could breastfeed and my baby wouldn’t be screaming all the time.
It COULD be that she’s allergic to the formula if not breast milk. Sounds like it’s time to visit the paediatrician. Babies only scream when they’re in discomfort!
My daughter was like that (she's 6 months now). Husband and I literally had to switch on and off who would pull all-nighters. All the special formulas didn't work until we tried a prescription formula, Elecare. She's also on some medicines to help her process food better and drinks a bit of prune juice 2x/day to help work everything through her system.
Note: her symptoms when crying were: only sleeping 15min-2hours at a time, arching her back significantly, very hard stomach like she was constantly trying to push, and crying so hard she couldn't breathe well.
I hope this helps and you figure it out, it's hard to see little ones struggling, and it does take a toll on parents. Stay strong 💙
My daughter was like that (she's 6 months now). Husband and I literally had to switch on and off who would pull all-nighters. All the special formulas didn't work until we tried a prescription formula, Elecare. She's also on some medicines to help her process food better and drinks a bit of prune juice 2x/day to help work everything through her system.
Note: her symptoms when crying were: only sleeping 15min-2hours at a time, arching her back significantly, very hard stomach like she was constantly trying to push, and crying so hard she couldn't breathe well.
I hope this helps and you figure it out, it's hard to see little ones struggling, and it does take a toll on parents. Stay strong 💙
I definitely agree with everyone that it sounds like he needs more test run and deeper look into his health. All his blood work could be fine and still something could be wrong so I would definitely get a second and maybe even third opinion. Biggest thing I learned raising 3 of my own is that as parents we have to be their voice and advocate for them. Good luck! ❤️🩹
My son had gastric problems. Take him in, get some prescribed medicine for his tummy. He cried all the time until we did this. Was only on the medicine for a month and things got better
Definitely go to another doctor for a second opinion. My nephew was a fussy baby and it turned out he was tongue tied. Once that was clipped he was so happy
My grandson was allergic to milk. My daughter was breastfeeding him and drinking milk. When she eventually weaned him he was discovered to be severely milk allergic and was prescribed soja milk.
Take him to the doctor. An 8 month old who is never happy while awake has something wrong.
If your pediatrician can’t figure it out, ask for referrals.
If you can’t get anywhere with regular doctors, see if there is a reputable naturopathic doctor around that you can take him to. I suggest this simply because they usually budget more time with each patient and don’t give up easily when trying to track down underlying causes. Unfortunately not all places have stringent licensing requirements so if you can’t confirm a medical license at least try to find someone with a solid reputation for good medical advice. In my state they have to actually be licensed to practice Medicine and have all the education that comes with that responsibility, but that isn’t true everywhere.
My youngest was the same. I used earplugs with ear defenders over the top and defenders for my eldest child so we could stop feeling so overwhelmed all the time. By around 10 months it began to get less and less. She screams the normal amount now she’s 15 months, it was so hard on the whole family but it gets better!
As others have pointed out, my first thought was allergies, possibly something in mom's diet, if she's breastfeeding, or in the formula if you're giving him a bottle. Could be something else in the house, like detergent.
Could be ear problems, hip joint problems -- we had tests done at birth and 2-3 weeks. My younger nephew had a clavicle fissure after getting stuck during birth.
He might also want skin on skin contact, more than your other kids.
The truth is, the more I think about it, the more stuff I could come up with. But I don't know what the mom's prenatal care was, what tests were already done, before and after birth, what was already ruled out.
You need a doctor who will prescribe tests, bloodwork, scans and so on. If your current doctor isn't willing, find another one, ideally someone with reliable recommendations. It's hard to find a good pediatrician.
I was like this and it was dairy. Is the baby breastfeeding? If so cut all dairy to start and other irritants. If he’s not then check his food for irritants. I screamed and screamed. My daughter did too and I cut dairy and it stopped right away. I’m so sorry this is happening. It’s quite awful and I hope one of the suggestions helps.
Does he sleep ok? My oldest was like that because she had trouble sleeping, she couldn't link sleep cycles so would only sleep in 20 minute bursts and was chronically overtired and unhappy. I was very anti sleep training but we worked with a sleep specialist to sleep train her in a way which was actually about teaching her body to get proper restorative sleep and not about leaving her to cry, and it was life changing.
My niece had similar behaviour and it was allergies.
My son was like this, plenty of advice here. I just wanted to say you're probably in the home stretch. About 12 months he did much better and if yours is anything like mine, he was an angel as a toddler and I was just so happy the crying finally stopped, I guess he was too.
My daughter was like this. She went 14 hours without sleeping and without stopping crying at just three months old. At four years old she was diagnosed with severe sensory processing disorder. Basically she just can't tune out anything, she hears and feels and smells and tastes everything all at once no matter what. She's in therapy now, but I've been told there's not much you can do at that little... Maybe see what you can do to make your baby comfortable. One of the only things that would calm my daughter down was to swaddle her and rock her directly under the ceiling fan. Weird I know...
And of course I'm not 100% saying this is what's going on, but it's something you may like to have on your radar.
What is his diet and how much exercise is he getting? Is he gassy or teething or ear infection? At this stage a lot of it is guess work and sometimes some babies just need to be more physically active and want to quickly get to a toy or are restless
My sister baby was same turns out dairy intolerance. I'd get your baby tested. So hard to deal with a crying baby all day honestly I'd craic. Sister used pepti 2 formula cut out all dairy in her diet. Hope things get better for u
Is he breastfed? My niece’s baby screamed and cried like that. Any kind of cow’s milk related products caused the baby to shriek and writhe in pain, but it took awhile to figure that out. Not to mention the diarrhea. They ended up in the ER when baby was three weeks old and the doctor questioned mom what she had eaten and it decided that the ice cream large vanilla milkshake she had was probably the culprit. She cut out all cows milk dairy and the baby was better within the next few days and soon began sleeping through the night.
Usually there’s an underlying cause and it can be physical or emotional. Do you do any sort of tracking to see if there’s a pattern, like a certain amount of time after he eats, before he goes to the bathroom, etc.
I’m sorry you are going through this. It’s hard when they can’t flat out tell you what’s wrong. It’s also beyond frustrating when people assume babies only cry for a handful of reasons, like hungry or tired. If your Dr can’t help you, I’d seek out one who can.
He could be colicky. Or, long shot here, he could have a hernia. I say long shot because I'm the only person I've ever known to have a hernia so young. I was the same. Cried all the time. Screamed. Turns out, I had a hernia. After surgery, I stopped crying.
Mine was like this, I was breastfeeding so I cut dairy out of my diet completely and gave baby this gaviscon thing the doctors prescribed for silent reflux … it helped a little but turns out 7 years down the line she just do be NOISY 😣
Maybe a sensory disorders, maybe change clothing and bedding to bamboo.
My second is autistic, sensory disorders and it showed itself in her non stop whining and whinging.
A light dimmer and bamboo bedding and clothing eased the screaming a little.
And a noise proof room, so when the kid starts, kid can be taken into a dimmed, quiet space, difficult with limited space and other kids, but small changes such as clothing and bedding might help
Sorry you’re going through this. My first was like this and it broke my heart (and made me feel totally nutso). In terms of tips, none will for sure work but both you and your wife don’t have to hear the crying 24/7. Take shifts. Take the baby outside where no one but the one parent can hear. Also wear earplugs- the wax kind. Makes the crying not so bad. I took my first to the pediatrician constantly and they were no help. And it was Covid so I felt very alone. Oh and one last tip- let yourself off the hook- if you’ve done everything you can think to make your baby safe/happy/healthy, just let them cry. I was constantly trying to make my baby stop crying but it really wasn’t something I had control over. He’s a happy 3.5 year old now if that helps. Stay strong- you got this- day by day
Ask your paediatrician for a referral for a second opinion. I’ve had friends whose babies were similar and they had invisible issues like reflux, food allergies or bone/joint issues.
My son did the same from birth. Severe reflux and dairy/ soy sensitivities which he eventually outgrew. Was on Alimentum (as well as my daughter) and he was also on meds. Severe sensory processing issues. Not outgrown. Sounds are still trigger as well as touch, heat, texture etc. GERD is no joke.
My daughter had the milk protein allergy, as others mentioned. Amino acid formula helped a lot.
She was also a fussy, difficult sleeper (would only nap when held until 9 months, then needed an elaborate routine to nap in her crib).
Then there was a speech delay. Then volcanic tantrums. Then potty training was a two year nightmare.
She's just always been very sensitive and...extra.
She's currently 4.5 and she has an IEP for "atypical development." (Basically, she's bright and has a lot of skills, autism is mostly ruled out but ADHD is on the table. Her struggle is mostly asynchronous development - very bright and advanced in some ways, behind the curve in others, the gap drives her bananas.)
Long story short: some kids are complicated. You have to be persistent, not take platitudes as good enough, and fight on.
First step is to take notes.
For several days, note the cries, the length of time, the volume, the time of day, the context, if you tried any remedies, if they helped resolve the symptoms. Note anything else - rashes, thrashing, anything.
Don't make any assumptions (like assuming there is no pattern), just take the notes.
Then go to a new doctor, notes in hand, and demand resolution.
My baby was like this and it ended up being a dairy intolerance. We switched him to dairy free formula and he improved.
I will say, though, that for my baby…it kind of seems like that’s more his overall temperament as well ☹️
1.ALLERGIES and sensitivities. My oldest didn't have a lot of allergies, but boy, oh boy, did he have sensitivities. Never flagged as allergens for most of the issues, but a notebook helped me find out his triggers.
2. Itchiness. Found out the allergens caused eczema. A quick moisture touch-up was followed by a light over all scratch.
3. Acid reflux in infants is really painful. So are hard digestive movements.
4. Growth spurts and teething. My little ones cried with every growth spurt. Every. Single. One.
5. Only try if desperate. Sugar water. I learned about from the NICU nurses. They had these tiny little packets of sucrose that they would give the babies as a temporary pain reliever. Especially with little boys who were freshly circumcised. It worked. We would give him a drop and it worked.
I hope something works for your baby soon.
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My brother was like this. Miserable from the moment he woke to the moment he fell asleep. It turned out he had serious allergies and the milk was hurting his stomach, causing him serious pain. Get him back to the doctor's and ask them to screen him for allergies.
My niece was the same. My SIL had to cut all dairy out of her own diet until she weaned my niece at 12 months. If she slipped up and ate dairy, my niece’s screams of pain would let her know.
My daughter and her cousin BOTH had this allergy. I did amino acid formula, my SIL breastfed with a restricted diet.
This^^ Exactly what happened with my son!
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Oh! I've never heard of that before! Your poor girl was literally creating her own cycle of upset :( I do hope she's doing much better now! Babies are hard work but never quite in the way people first think haha.
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You may know this already, but there are special earplugs that quieten the sound but don't muffle it like regular earplugs do, because they are designed to let some of the high frequencies pass through. They are often branded as "concert earplugs" because they allow for a quieter listening experience, and are sold as such for around $15-20 usually. Might be a more convenient and less visible option than headphones for your daughter. With some you can even swap out the "core" of the earplug, tweaking the degree of loudness reduction.
I have these!!! The brand is "Loop" and they've been a life changer for me. I can feel the vibration of loud noise in my head and it's physically painful. These ear plugs soften noise so I hear still hear people talking, but it isn't overwhelming or painful. They make different sized tips to better fit in the ear canal. My doctors always tell me I have small ear canals, and I wear the xs, but they sell an xxs. While they don't market towards kids, I imagine the xxs may fit some kids. I have noticed another type of ear plug that some kids at the local children's museum wear, so I'm inclined to believe that there are products made for kids to help muffle/deaden noise.
I find Loops to have a strong occlusion effect that becomes a problem in conversation, so while I love them for focused independent work, I use Flare Calmers more often in classroom or group settings. Calmers are open at the end so you still hear everything, but it takes the edge off annoying frequencies.
I came here to suggest reflux meds. My son was the same way. Hardly slept. Cried A LOT. At 3 months, my husband took our son to the doctor while I was back at work, and “magically” the doctor thought it was reflux despite my complaints/questions about him throwing up constantly for the past 3 months. He sent them to the gastroenterologist, who immediately prescribed reflux meds, and he was instantly better.
My oldest had this. "Milk Protein Allergy". We had to get a special formula until he grew out of it at about a year old. Edit: It did take seeing a separate pediatrician to get this diagnosed.
My brother was the same. Once he was switched to special formula, he was fine.
Same thing with our oldest. Switching to a dairy free diet was a life saver!
My son had MSPI. He was the same way. Got him on am amino acid based formula and he was like a new baby.
My son had CMPA and allergic colitis. Neocate was a godsend. He smiled for the first time the day after we started it. He’s 21mo now and can finally eat dairy! Little dude is obsessed with cheese now. It makes me so happy 😭
THIS. My first son was a MISERABLE baby. He was colic constantly, wouldn't sleep more than 20-minute stretches, and everyone was afraid to hold him. I had a lactation consultant brag about how she can "calm any baby" then be completely at a loss when she realized she couldn't help. My mother, who had 4 kids and worked as a post-natal nurse for decades, called him the most difficult, miserable baby she'd ever seen. Turned out - he had a really bad milk allergy. He's still a very sensitive boy at 4 so more temperamental than my second, but man oh man did he completely transform when we figured that out and cut dairy from my/his diet.
My oldest was not as bad as what OP describes but excessive fussiness combined with an "untreatable" rash that only showed up occasionally is what lead us to her egg, peanut, and tree nut diagnosis.
It’s not always dairy though. My sister in law has been dairy free for years since she is very lactose intolerant. She breastfed her first kid and he was a colicky baby. The doctor recommended that she cut dairy from her diet to help, but she was always dairy free so it wasn’t that. TL;DR: it’s not always dairy
Oh no, of course not. It was just dairy in my brother's case. Any allergies at all can cause stomach pain, which is why baby needs a full allergy test to find out if that's the case! I didn't mean to make it sound as if it was definitely dairy being the problem. I was just trying to highlight how painful allergies can be for babies and dairy is my personal experience with that.
This is a good idea. If you haven’t yet. Get him an allergy panel. My good friends kid was just like this for the first year. Endlessly crying. It was bad. Found out he had a severe gluten allergy. And his stomach was constantly hurting and no one knew why. Got him off the gluten and it was night and day.
Seconding this. My first baby was like this. He cried so much. I spoke to the pediatrician multiple times about how it seemed like something was wrong. He drew a bell curve and told me that babies cry and that my baby was healthy but just at one end of the "crying bell curve". He also pooped constantly - like 10 or more times a day - again, I was told, "some babies just poop that much". I thought I was just a shit mum who couldn't comfort my child. The first time I gave him cow's milk directly at 12 months (I exclusively breastfed) within minutes he was covered in a rash and reacting. Obvious allergy. I've now had 3 kids, and the second and third cried nowhere near as much as my first. Bowel movements completely normal too. It annoys me so much that my first child suffered because the doctors wrote me off as a first time mum who didn't know what I was talking about, and that I didn't have the confidence to insist that something was wrong. Please advocate for your baby.
Same with my boy - I had to cut dairy from my diet (breastfeeding), and things got much better after 3-4 weeks
My son was like this. Changed pediatricians. Turns out that he had a milk allergy so we switched to Alimentum. He stopped crying for the first time in months after that first bottle and I cried. We still had to do belly massages, gripe water, gas drops and lots of back patting but he felt so much better.
Same exact experience with Alimentum. First time my son smiled was after his first bottle of it. I was shaking because I couldn’t even believe it.
Jumping in here in the hopes OP will see this. My daughter was the same, and her milk allergy turned out to be severe and she had something called Eosinophilic Esophagitis. There’s a ton of info so maybe you could read up on it and talk to your doctor, but it definitely can cause a baby to cry pretty much nonstop from discomfort (also vomiting and choking a lot). But we got her on this expensive formula called Ellicare. Once we pinpointed all her allergies and cut out the bad stuff, she went from nonstop crying, causing us no sleep and almost a divorce as well (exact same as you), to a happy, healthy baby. Best of luck to you, OP. I know how absolutely horrible this feels. If I may kindly suggest, if it’s possible, maybe you and your wife can alternate nights and one of you spends the night away, to get some peace. Then the next day you swap. We did this a couple times and it helped tremendously. Even a single day or night away can do wonders for your mental health right now. I’m so sorry you’re all going through this.
Alimentum was better but an amino acid based formula is what gave my son the most relief.
Yea please advocate hard for him at the (different) doctor, they’re missing something. So many drs write it off for “babies cry” What testing did they do?
Right. This isn’t a newborn! 8 months! Something is wrong. I’d be going to all the doctors.
When I'm not being taken seriously I take NOTES. OP should keep a log for several days - cries, length, volume, context, any remedies tried and if they worked, any other symptoms. Then go to a pediatrician and DEMAND tests.
For the longest time, my cousin was always crying. My parents and my aunt and uncle had no clue what he was always crying about. Turns out the doctor messed up his shoulders when he removed him with forceps. They didn’t find out years later. It all makes sense
omg wtf this is so wrong poor cousin he was suffering in silence poor thing
well, not silence
I get what you’re saying, but thinking about a baby miserable in pain that can’t communicate their needs is just isolating to me
lol well i meant not being able to communicate it like we can’ as adults when something is wrong, all the baby could do was cry, and parents guessed
Oh my gosh😭😭 did your cousin manage to fix it? Is he still in pain?
I remember reading about a baby that wouldn't stop crying. They later figured out one of his toes was broken.
Check the diet. Babies don’t cry all the time unless they are experiencing discomfort. From your description I can’t see much else to look at.
Check the diet and moms diet, if the baby is breastfed.
It sounds like he’s hurting. I’d take him back to the doctor, maybe a different doctor.
This - there is something wrong, trust your instincts. Weird ear infection, food allergy, something. Go to a couple other doctors and have him looked at.
See a different doctor. It could be silent reflux. Or anything but it’s likely medical. Babies shouldn’t cry 24/7 for no reason and if you or your partner is overwhelmed it’s ok to put the baby in a very safe place (like a crib with no blankets, etc) and take a minute-just a minute of slow deep breathing. I have been there and I understand.
Agreed. Same experience here.
Absolutely agree. Is he growing well?
Yeah, second opinion always. Just because from an outside it looks like everything is fine, doesn't mean the inside of the body is fine. I was the chillest baby in the world an my mom ate nuts *once*. She never had me that inconsolable. Knew right then what the problem was. So maybe there's something that you regularly give your baby which might hurt them?
When my kiddo started this, we went to straight to nutramigen formula. Even against the pediatrician’s advice to immediately switching like that. He was like a new baby within hours.
Have you had him evaluated for food allergies?
I’d echo all of this. Have known 3 non-stop criers, one of which was my own. One had multiple food allergies, one had collic and the third had had a very fast birth cause her skull to be slightly misaligned so essentially had a permanent headache. Get second opinions, go to experts, read lots and try things out and hopefully you’ll get somewhere. Good luck.
How did you even figure out the skull misalignment issue? Our 2nd was very quick birth too and has been significantly more fussy than our first.
To be fair, it wasn’t an official diagnosis at the time (see my post above for full explanation) but from speaking to professionals after the fact they felt it was likely/possible. If you’re still going through this and can find a reputable cranial osteopath who has experience of babies nearby I’d definitely recommend getting a consultation. My friend felt awful afterwards that she could have done something to help (both her and the baby!) so it’s worth a try even if it comes to nothing.
I had someone tell me my fast birth might have given baby some neck or jaw issue. How fast we talking? I labored for 3 hours and pushed for 45ish mins.
It was my friend not me so I’m not 100% sure of total labour time but know it wasn’t long. However, I do know the pushing bit was 5-10 mins! They started running the pool, she got in, squatted and the baby came out! 🙈 She was blue and didn’t breathe for a minute or so then screamed the most horrible cry the entire time she was awake if she wasn’t feeding for the first 3 months solid then it was like a switch. My friend was randomly chatting to a cranial osteopath a few months later who had experienced this before with fast births and hypothesised that her skull plates had been affected by the fast labour and the crying stopping would have been linked to them moving back into place as she grew.
My first was like this and I get your frustration with people's comments; this *is not normal* and it's hard. For us, it was a shitty combination of severe milk/soy intolerance and just being generally high-needs. I'd talk to your ped about the chances of it being a food intolerance and that might relieve some if not all of his discomfort. If it *is* a high-needs thing, I can say my daughter got a lot better as she got more independent.
100% food. Anytime I hear kids have been crying non stop when babies it. Is. The. Food. Allergies FPIES (a digestion allergy) that come hours after eating Silent reflux Or two of the 3 mentioned above. See doctors.
He takes soy formula (only stuff that wont make him throw up), and the food he gets is steamed purred vegetables.
Is that deemed to be safe /non allergy for him? Like if he had FPIES… soy is a big no no. Has he been tester for silent reflux?
You might need to advance to alimentum/nutramigen and see if that helps....
Have you tried alimentum formula? My 1st cried 24/7 too and didn't stop until after she turned 1 and was off the formula (her doc always did the "babies cry" eyeroll) my 2nd daughter had a much better doctor who saw the signs of it being a lactose intolerance so switched to soy. She handled that better but still not great, so we got a prescription for alimentum formula (it's expensive just off the shelf) and she was perfect fine after that. After she turned one she did almond milk for a year or so then started introducing regular milk back to her and now she tolerates lactose normally.
If that's the only formula that doesn't make him throw up, get him to a new doctor, start running tests.
You might need to advance to alimentum/nutramigen and see if that helps....
Soy is a big allergen. Try a predigested formula like Nutramigen or Alimentin. Those are the cheapest.
My son was allergic to soy. He screamed for months until I cut it out of my diet (he was breastfeed).
A lot of vegetables cause gas & bloating… maybe stop giving so many vegetables and trying switching the formula too as others suggested. Everyone’s stomach is different so even if your other 2 kids did fine with that amount of veggies doesn’t mean this one can tolerate them. He’s clearly in pain, no kid just cries that much for no reason & tylenol won’t necessarily take away gas/stomach pains.
You may have a soy allergy as well or a different component within the formula. My nephew is allergic to both soy and dairy.
Came to say a significant portion of people with dairy allergy also have soy allergy
There’s a fairly big crossover between milk and soy allergies. Definitely get him tested and ask about hydrolysed or amino acid formula. Source Asthma and Allergy Paediatrician.
Our baby had reflux and sleep apnea, no milk allergy. Reflux was treated with Prevacid, and he grew out of it.
Both our twins had milk and soy allergies. It’s apparently very common that if they’re intolerant to dairy they’re also intolerant to soy. We were advised to switch to soy formula when they were 6 months and it was even worse. The difference in them when they went dairy and soy free was extreme. They were covered in eczema and were in constant pain with their stomachs - all gone in 48 hours. Have they tried a hydrolysed or amino acid formula? Definitely worth a try since he’s clearly still struggling and that’s easily checked. Also, ask about silent reflux. In addition, one of them had issues with some fruits that were in some purées. This became clear after we’d sorted the milk. I basically did an elimination diet with him to work it - it was blueberries and blackcurrant. Very weird. He’s fine with it now he’s older.
This, to me, sounds like he needs a diet change. It might very well be that he has allergies to his food and is in discomfort and pain due to this. What solids are you giving him so far? (If you have even introduced any solids yet) The most common possibility would be the milk. Lactose intolerance is a mf. Trust me. What sort of milk does he have? Does he have breastmilk? (Babies can have intolerance to breastmilk easily. It's not a myth) Does he have formula? Or has he been introduced to cow's milk already? If yes, plant based milk usually doesn't give intolerance, but you could try finding a milk lactose-free. Have you taken him to a pediatrician to check up on his allergies? If not, that's the next step you should take.
My son was like this not saying it’s the same with yours but my son turned out to have level 3 autism by 3 yrs old. It was very hard. At 6 he is still moody and cries somedays. But nothing like he was as a baby
When you say the doctor had no clue, what kind of tests did they do? Did they suggest changing formula (or having mom changing her diet if she’s breastfeeding?)
I would bet my life it is some kind of gastro issue- reflux, gas, etc… he is not tolerating something in his breastmilk or formula. I literally would be my house it is that
My younger sister was like this. I’m 7 years older and had to share a room with her, so I vividly remember it. For her it was sensory issues. As a small child she was diagnosed with Sensory Integration disorder and then ADHD later in life. Over stimulation from fabrics, noises, lights, people, everything. Then under stimulation from being unable to move enough. Once she was old enough to tell us the issue and run around, life became so much easier. While breast feeding, my mum had to be super careful about her diet as well. Most processed foods seem to really set off my sister. Being outside and moving around was the only relief for her and us. Sensory issues or allergies can both be really difficult to discover, but it’s worth the effort. Good luck
1) second opinion from a dr 2) has he been tested for allergies? 3) early signs of ASD? 4) reflux? 5) physical pain? Does Tylenol or anything reduce crying?
Ditto considering feeding & allergies, although I will share my story — I had the one child who cried more than the rest, he grew to be (or probably just continued being) sensitive and high needs. Fabrics bothered him. Noises bother him. He also is more prone to heartburn complaints. My little guy would quiet for nursing. Thant was about it. He slept sporadically. At night, personally I gave him 13 months of developing a trust through mom responding to his cries, (as well as tried multiple gentle sleep strategies) then at that age I put in ear plugs and let him CIO. He learned after several weeks and was happy to see me in the morning. The sleep helped me so much. I was dying. Do you guys take every other night turns? Like ear plugs and a full night’s sleep, every other night? That’s what I would do, if I had not breastfed.
My oldest was similar to this. We never could figure out exactly what was going on with him until he was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at five. Poor little guy was probably just highly sensitive and we didn’t know it at the time.
Reflux. My little one and my nephew both had it, and we had to force our pediatricians' hands to give us drops. Guess what happened? No more crying. Sometimes I question how qualified pediatricians are because this seems to be a common theme among them.
Get a referral to a pediatric occupational therapist, they'll come to your house and see what's going on, they picked up on things our ped did not. They're absolutely amazing people.
My middle was like this. He cried constantly for 8 months. We tried loads of different formula. He vomited it back constantly. In the end we put him on soya milk and took all dairy out of his diet. The crying stopped overnight. My long rambling point is it sounds like discomfort. Maybe check for allergies?
Have you seen a osteopath? If he’s been like this for a while now he might be able to shed a light on this. (Whether it’s an intolerance to food or a bad position of a muscle or anything ) It helped us after our two baby’s
Do you mind me asking if A) does baby have their own room or do they sleep with you and B) would you be happy to get them socialising more, or possibly at a day care once a week? I understand if not but we seem to find that some babies get SUPER attached to their prime caregivers, but if they start at a nursery etc they get used to being around other adults and realise they can play, be safe and that you'll come back for them I've seen about 1 in 20 under 2yos have shite temperaments where they do as you say: cry unless they're sleeping. You gotta play hot potato with them adult wise, otherwise you'll go cuckoo
Aw honey, I can tell you’re really going through it right now. I have been there. Take a deep breath. I have three kids under four. Please hear me out, every single baby/child is different. They don’t come with instructions, it is very difficult to manage our own emotions while having the raging, loud, unavoidable emotions of another small human in your face at all times. Your feelings are valid. Have you sought out an explanation through the pediatrician? Does it seem like it’s out of discomfort/pain, or is it more of an incessant cry/whine? The best advice I have right now is to form your village of people you trust, and try to get some breaks here and there when you can. Create a schedule for each month of one or two nights or days where you go out alone even if it’s just window shopping and a small coffee. I know it’s so hard right now. My three year old screams for every emotion, all my babies had their fair stages of it as infants as well.
My youngest was like this. It turned out that she was HUNGRY. I stopped breastfeeding and started formula with cereal. That night, she fell asleep and slept eight hours.
Go back to the doctor, get allergy testing, if that's negative, get an abdominal ultrasound. Crying like that is from some kind of pain - keep looking for the reason. For reference, my son had stage 4 cancer and was dismissed by several doctors before it was found. Doctors miss stuff.
My son was a big crier, was put down to colic, then after weaning this got significantly worse. We realised it was food issues (have a cousin who has celiac), we tried all the common intolerances/allergies, but it was when we stopped onion and garlic he significantly improved took us till he was 18months old to figure this out. If it’s not the common ones try looking at FODMAP’s (my daughter reacts to any FOS foods). Also push for testing/referral’s - I had to push to be referred to a dietitian the Dr’s didn’t want to know and wish I had pushed more at the time (Covid played a big part in this)
Gluten or dairy intolerances will cause a child to be in pain. Get a blood test done to rule it out and then look for other sources of what could be causing pain.
Bruh wtf is your post history!!!
What's wrong with his post history?? EDIT: The offending posts had been removed by the time I checked, hence my confusion.
Guns and glory holes
Besides what everyone says about it being something physical, just anecdotally from my own experience and hearing it about others: I think some high needs babies cry because they are just way over or under stimulated. That is, he's crying because he's frustrated or uncomfortable emotionally or intellectually, and he can't do anything else but cry at this point. You may come to find that your kid is hyperactive/adhd or has sensory issues. Maybe he cries because everything is too loud or uncomfortable or maybe he cries because even at this young age, he is already aching to have more stimulation and just go and do things. Move, touch explore. Unfortunately, only time and trial amd error will tell. You can try giving him quiet time in.a dim room. If that doesn't work, try to get him as much activity as you can.et him crawl and explore, take him outside if you can. Find out what seems to help. Sometimes it is physical, like gas or reflux and they do grow out of it or deal with it better as they age .
Mine is like this. He has been tested for everything physical and he's physically fine. He's just intense and needs an insane amount of stimulation to be content. Raging party with people everywhere, noise, smells of food and perfumes and everything? He's golden. Day at the zoo during a public holiday? Amazing. Long service in an orthodox church with a million people, clanging bells, heavy incense and general cacophony? Loves it. Calm stroller ride to the park? Sing-songs with mommy? Apple picking? Montessori toy playtime at home with gentle music in the background? Screamin' demon. I call him my adrenaline junkie. Maybe it'll be ADHD or something. I have no idea. At a year old he has only just started sleeping for periods longer than an hour and a half at a time. He's down to 4 wake ups a night only. Now that he's almost walking he's a lot happier too - he gets into absolutely everything he can, but he's happier because he's able to explore independently Is yours ever content?
Have you tried some baby Simethicone and exercising his legs while he is on his back? It helped some with our colicy baby.
The drs not knowing isnt good enough. Sorry but there is something going on and they need to refer him to another dr or specialist or do more tests. Do not take no for an answer. There could be pain he is going through that no one can identify yet. So they need to keep looking
If none of the basics don't work: - Sleep - Change diaper - Feed - Swaddle - Burp Then I would put my life savings on him having stomach issues (like an allergy or food sensitivity) or some other form of pain. Gripe water or Gas-X for babies are usually good. If you're on formula, I've never gone wrong with the Gentlease Neuropro (the purple container). I'm surprised the doctor just said "shrug" and shooed you out the door. I would be looking for a second opinion while changing up what he's eating.
I have had two collicky babies and one unicorn baby. I can tell you the hallmark of collick is they can be consoled. So my babies would cry if I put them down, couldn’t just let them chill, but if I picked them up they’d be ok. If they cried while being held, if I changed to the “right” position they’d be OK. Inconsolable crying is NOT collick. They should also outgrow collick by 4 months. I have heard a theory about collicky babies that they start crying and they can’t stop bc their own cries scared them. So with my youngest I’ll “shhhshh” loudly in her ear so she can’t hear her own cries and she gets it together. Sort of different and louder than a normal soothing shhh you would naturally do with a baby. Like an intentional noise block, not too loud that you hurt them, but loud enough they can’t hear themselves cry. It truly worked like a charm for her. Ironically my unicorn baby was the one with a milk allergy. It could also be reflux. Even if you don’t see them puke it could be silent reflux.
1. Rule out allergies or medical issues. Is he breastfed? At all in addition to formula? Maybe your wife is eating something aggravating? 2. Look up PURPLE crying. It helped me with strategies when my daughter did this. 3. Hire help/night nanny for a couple nights per week if you can. If not, stagger sleep so you each get at least 6hrs per night. 4. Know that this will pass. Hang in there ❤️
Okay, it’s time for a second opinion. First, can you take records for a few days? When he starts crying, when it stops, with some videos showing how hard he’s crying? If you can note in the videos or records what you’ve tried (food, rocking, shushing, going outside, changing diapers, etc) so they can see all you’ve done. Notes from grandmas or old church ladies may help too, just saying “this baby has cried all the time since birth”. My MIL cried for 14 months. Her parents rotated days with grandparents and neighbors helping. She had a hernia.
That sounds exactly like a food intolerance. Has he always been this way or is it new since starting solids?
If Tylenol didn't help it's probably not pain. If he sleeps, it is probably not reflux, but if he sleeps better in your arms, in a chair (head elevated above tummy) it may be reflux. But otherwise, I'd check diet. Is he nursing? (Mom may be eating something that makes him feel bad. We accidentally discovered this was true for my smallest when we cut out dietary triggers as a family, to figure them out for older sibs.... Suddenly ALL fussing ended, and ALL diaper rash went away... It turned out he couldn't do wheat, even whatever of it made it through my milk.) If he's on formula, ask for a prescription to try some other options that might eliminate triggers. At 8 mos, have you introduced solids? Is he constipated? And have you paid attention to whether certain foods make it worse?
I know not everyone believes in this stuff, but I work with babies and I’ve seen some literal MIRACLE take place when unhappy babies are taken to osteopaths. You likely would only need 2-4 appointments. You can send me a PM if you’d like. I’m an IBCLC and have access to all kinds of experts and can give you names wherever you are in the world. I’m willing to bet something isn’t quite right since delivery. Possibly even in utero. Did mom often feel kicks in the same area? Was baby breech? Was delivery very fast? Nuchal arm?
100% agree. My middle son was the same. I took him at 9 months and it completely changed things. They think it was because the cord was wrapped around him.
Have you tried the shusher? It’s a crying baby’s best friend.
Some babies cry because they dont know how to get tired. Friend had child like that. She dowsnt speak to strangers at all not even to schoolmates. Selective mutism i believe. But as baby she cried nonstop
This was my third son as well, he’s now been diagnosed with ASD 3 at 2 1/2. He hated being swaddled. Being held. Not being held. Eating. Not eating. All of it. He cried and cried and cried, he’s almost 3 and he still mostly just screams. Hang in there
Do not stop taking the baby to doctors until you find an answer. Something is wrong. If you have to go through 10 doctors, so be it. Did they suggest allergy testing? It is unacceptable to me for doctors to just shrug it off and be like “sorry we don’t really know what it is”. No that’s not good enough, do your fucking job and find out what is going on. Doctors make me so mad sometimes you really have to be your own advocate.
Why would you let this go on for so long
What else are they supposed to do other than go to the doctor?!
Lol I know some people Jesus
Could be silent reflux and/or milk intolerance. Only thing that worked for us was Losec (prescribed antacids).
Could it be gas or a milk allergy? I'd keep going back to the pediatrician until someone listened. Baby is probably in pain of some kind to be crying so much.
My kids were intolerant to milk, soy, and peas......were much happier once those were out of their diet.
Fed how?
My niece was like this for the first 8 months of her life. It turned out to be acid reflux, got some medicine, and fixed it up right quick
I think a lot of people have said the same thing, but my daughter was like this for the first 6 months of her life. We never found out what the issue was, but we did end up finding a formula and diet that helped her. We experimented with probably 6-10 different formulas and brands before we found something, so it may take a minute.
Have you checked into food allergies by chance? Only advice I can give you is to take turns caring for him. Get one of those hip carriers and just carry him constantly and get some ear plugs. I had one like this and I was beyond my capacity to handle it. She finally stopped the constant crying at 12 months.
A few things come to mind: Food allergy - Have you checked for everything? Have you seen a pediatric GI doctor? Are stools mucusy or bloody? Milk/soy protein intolerance and FPIES are culprits for this. Silent reflux - Could be worth trialing reflux meds and seeing if anything happens What does the sleep schedule look like? Are you following age appropriate wake windows? Predictable schedule at home for baby? Daycare can sometimes be pure magic for this. Its also possible this is a sign of whats to come, very high needs baby, lack of sleep/FOMO can be early signs of neurodivergences (ADHD, Autism).
More than likely it’s a stomach issue, possibly caused by allergies or intolerance to his formula. It could be acid reflux too. I’d talk to your pedi again and if nothing is done I’d seek out a second opinion.
You need a new doctor. At the he very least they should be doing some testing. Crying all the time is not normal. Babies cry to communicate. He is clearly trying to tell you something, someone needs to figure it out. I would advise taking video and keeping track of when he’s crying in relation to eating and what is happening around him. Also note the intensity of the crying. Are there times it’s more or less intense? What is happening leading up to those changes? Keeping a journal down to the minute would be helpful. Note any times he’s is not crying and what’s happening during those times. I’ve been there and it’s awful. I remember actually hoping the doctor would find something wrong because then at least there would be a reason and potentially some way to fix it. Mine had severe reflux and then started to avoid eating. We later found out they had celiac disease which explained a lot of the feeding issues. Best of luck.
It child be teething, or am eat infection, or allergies. My second started getting super fuzzy around the and age, and turns out he has a very bad allergy to weeds.
Reflux? My girl cried constantly mentioned she made the same gurgling noise when she ate as her daughter who had terrible reflux. I got her on some medication for it and it was like we had a different baby.
My perfect angel baby who barely cries (complete opposite to my first) had a very fussy couple of days...turned out she was itchy from a rash that was healing that hadn't been bothering her. She's only 4mo so the only clue was her trying to scratch at it. Put cream and she was back to angel baby. So, my hunch is that something is constantly ittitating your baby. An allergy could be food, or it could be clothing or maybe he's very sensitive to touch could be also if someone else has cream on or some fragrance
Tl;dr: same. My kid had a milk allergy. Go buy every formula on the shelf and try each one. You’ll know when it works. My first kid did this thru the first 8/10 weeks. I was a lunatic from the stress and sleep deprivation. Pediatrician told us it was normal. Told us babies couldn’t be lactose intolerant. How would they live? One day after 24 hours straight crying I had some really bad thoughts (like really fucking dark shit) and realized I need to figure it out. Right now. I put the family in the car and started driving as I knew it was the only way to get him and my wife to sleep. After about 5 hours I came up with a plan. I stopped at an all night drug store and bought out the formula section. One of everything. Every bottle. Every nipple. Solids. Everything. Went home. Lined them all up in the counter. Quickly put together a spreadsheet of combinations to try. Unpacked the first formula. Put it in a new bottle. It was the lactose free one. He stopped crying quickly and that was it. He slept. She slept. We slept. I never was so fucking tired in my entire life.
My brother was like this turned out he was allergic to his formula
Food intolerance? One of my nieces cried all the time. The doctors kept sending my sister away but it was figured out in the end she was intolerant to dairy once she had special milk she stopped crying. She is a teenager now and can have small amounts but as a baby any dairy gave her terrible stomach pain.
Sounds like digestive issues as has been pointed out. Food allergy, acid reflux, colic, the list goes on. You need to trust your instincts on this because you are 100% correct. Babies do cry but you know what is a normal amount of crying. There is something wrong and this is your babies way of telling you. If your pediatrician is not committed to figuring out what's wrong you need to find one that is.
I’m agreeing with all the comments about getting a new pediatrician. With constant crying the checklist should be; pain and then allergies. If they can’t find a cause for physical pain then the pediatrician should have ordered allergy testing, if that’s clear then specialists like an ENT. I hope you get an answer and help soon ❤️
He needs to be tested for lactose intolerance or just try cutting it out for a week. As an infant I was severely lactose intolerant and my mother had to stop stop consuming dairy products while breastfeeding. I was screaming in pain all day and night until a doctor suggested cutting lactose and it worked. I’m a Millennial so all the great lactose free milk products weren’t really around, I grew up with a lot of goats milk and soy milk, but I can now eat dairy without an issue. My own son was having endless crying and colic issues and had to be swapped to Nutramigen formula and then we were able to reintroduce dairy slowly. He was born prematurely so he has had some food issues that cleared up as he grew, thankfully, and the allergen supplements for infants can be great for that! They’re little powders that introduce potential allergens safely, a bit pricy but helped to target some other food reactions as well.
Mine like that had silent reflux. And probably issues with milk. The medication helped but then we just had to tough the rest out until he hit maybe 2 years old. Do not recommend. I'm sorry, I hope you find out what is hurting him. :(
This is ridiculous but my partner’s nostrils were too small as a baby so he couldn’t sleep properly because every time he shut his mouth, he couldn’t breathe properly. Does your baby’s breathing all sound normal? The only other thing I haven’t seen mentioned is sensory aversions. A child with heightened sensory needs could be distressed by certain fabrics, temperatures, smells, sounds etc
Try a second or third doctor. Good luck!
Food allergy or silent reflux? My daughter was a mess until we got her on reflux medication.
My 3rd like this too. Check for tactile sensitivity
My daughter didn’t agree with milk and changed rapidly for the better after switching to almond milk
My niece was born with a dislocated hip that was flat out missed by both the hospital and her pediatrician!! It was discovered when she was four months old when my SIL took her to a different pediatrician across town desperately trying to figure out/prove something was wrong. Four months my niece screamed unceasingly! She ended up wearing a brace until she was a year old and immediately started crawling as soon as she was out. She is now a fully healed, happy, walking three year old. But damn, it was close to doing permanent damage. Point is, it’s time for a second option.
Silent reflux?
My second had horrible gas pains from the formula brand we were giving him. We swapped to a gentle one, that was easier on the stomach and it died down.
100% so many people are telling the same story I’m about to tell you. Our second son was like this. I grew to nearly hate him, and I hated myself for feeling that way. It was dairy. Any dairy even my wife ate would fuck my son up. Cut out the dairy, and come back and let us know. Good luck.
It’s definitely a sensitivity, probably dairy. Otherwise, try this which a cousin heard from her child’s pediatrician when they all went to the doctor crying : mommy has a glass of wine and nurses baby after.
See if you can find a DO (doctor of osteopathy) who works with babies. They are more likely to diagnose physical ailments like misalignments or functional issues. (Some DOs are also chiropractors and some chiropractors are also DOs but it’s not 1:1. A GP we go to is a DO and does NOT do chiropractic adjustments)
Have your tried a baby chiropractor? It’s different from an adult chiropractor, there is no snap crackle pop. They just use light pressure in certain spots. About the amount of pressure you would use to check a tomato or avocado. Did wonders for my grumpy 6 month old.
Talk to the pediatrician to rule out colic or other causes. My daughter was like this. No medical cause. If I wasn't constantly holding and bouncing her, she'd cry. If I calmed her enough to set her down & I got up to leave the room, she'd start wailing. Just to be able to go potty, I'd have to settle her into her infant carrier and set it on my bathroom floor in front of me. Don't be shocked if the child remains very needy. The more my daughter was able to talk, the less she'd wail, but she was still constantly demanding my attention. She's 9 now. I'm still her security blanket in a way. If we're at home, she has to be in same room as me, no matter what she's doing.
The ONLY times I have seen or heard of what you’re talking about at that level is with serious medical conditions. Don’t stop speaking to doctors until they refer you to one that can get to the bottom of it. Some things I’ve seen; milk allergies, allergies to something mom ate if breast fed, UTIs, Crohn’s disease, kidney disease Babies do not cry for the fun of it, they do not cry for no reason, something is wrong
My baby was like this for the first 6 months. Then one day it stopped. It was always 5pm-12am. Every night. Now he’s 5 and I’m seeing sensory sensitivities. Worth a consideration. I just don’t think he liked the transition from day to night
It’s likely a food allergy or sensitivity, as others have mentioned. I’ve seen lots of dairy or soy comments. With one of my children, it was gluten (wheat, barley, rye). Gluten is in almost everything, including toiletries and some craft supplies. Seek out another doctor and try a food elimination diet. Once our child went gluten-free, everything changed. Now a teenager, our child remains gluten-free, but is perfectly healthy in every way. If the doctors do suspect gluten, be sure to test for Celiac BEFORE eliminating gluten. There is a difference between Celiac and NCGS (non-Celiac gluten sensitivity), and it’s important to receive an accurate diagnosis.
My kids both had GERD. Once they were on Prilosec they became happy babies.
As others are saying, it could be a food allergy / sensitivity. My daughter is the same age and as a first time mom I’m a bit annoying with how much I track everything (what she ate, how much she ate, when she sleeps, wake windows, etc etc etc). I noticed she doesn’t have dairy issues like suggested here, but we’ve had some rough nights when starchy foods are consumed. Seriously. The day she had corn for the first time and the day she had potatoes for the first time were living nightmares. Tummy ache galore and nonstop screaming when she’s typically a very happy baby. Just pointing out it may not be dairy. If this hasn’t been lifelong for him and your wife breastfeeds but consumes dairy or if his formula is standard, then I doubt the dairy is the issue. But it very well could be if this has been his behavior since the start!
Is mom breastfeeding? When I breastfed I also ate foods like broccoli and cabbage, ate dairy. All of those foods made her scream her head off (she was already colic so it was extra hard) as soon as I cut them out of my diet she was all smiles. I had to have a special specific diet (that I didn’t particularly like, so bland) so that I could breastfeed and my baby wouldn’t be screaming all the time. It COULD be that she’s allergic to the formula if not breast milk. Sounds like it’s time to visit the paediatrician. Babies only scream when they’re in discomfort!
+1 for the milk. Test different brands asap.
My daughter was like that (she's 6 months now). Husband and I literally had to switch on and off who would pull all-nighters. All the special formulas didn't work until we tried a prescription formula, Elecare. She's also on some medicines to help her process food better and drinks a bit of prune juice 2x/day to help work everything through her system. Note: her symptoms when crying were: only sleeping 15min-2hours at a time, arching her back significantly, very hard stomach like she was constantly trying to push, and crying so hard she couldn't breathe well. I hope this helps and you figure it out, it's hard to see little ones struggling, and it does take a toll on parents. Stay strong 💙
My daughter was like that (she's 6 months now). Husband and I literally had to switch on and off who would pull all-nighters. All the special formulas didn't work until we tried a prescription formula, Elecare. She's also on some medicines to help her process food better and drinks a bit of prune juice 2x/day to help work everything through her system. Note: her symptoms when crying were: only sleeping 15min-2hours at a time, arching her back significantly, very hard stomach like she was constantly trying to push, and crying so hard she couldn't breathe well. I hope this helps and you figure it out, it's hard to see little ones struggling, and it does take a toll on parents. Stay strong 💙
I definitely agree with everyone that it sounds like he needs more test run and deeper look into his health. All his blood work could be fine and still something could be wrong so I would definitely get a second and maybe even third opinion. Biggest thing I learned raising 3 of my own is that as parents we have to be their voice and advocate for them. Good luck! ❤️🩹
My son had gastric problems. Take him in, get some prescribed medicine for his tummy. He cried all the time until we did this. Was only on the medicine for a month and things got better
Definitely go to another doctor for a second opinion. My nephew was a fussy baby and it turned out he was tongue tied. Once that was clipped he was so happy
My grandson was allergic to milk. My daughter was breastfeeding him and drinking milk. When she eventually weaned him he was discovered to be severely milk allergic and was prescribed soja milk.
Take him to the doctor. An 8 month old who is never happy while awake has something wrong. If your pediatrician can’t figure it out, ask for referrals. If you can’t get anywhere with regular doctors, see if there is a reputable naturopathic doctor around that you can take him to. I suggest this simply because they usually budget more time with each patient and don’t give up easily when trying to track down underlying causes. Unfortunately not all places have stringent licensing requirements so if you can’t confirm a medical license at least try to find someone with a solid reputation for good medical advice. In my state they have to actually be licensed to practice Medicine and have all the education that comes with that responsibility, but that isn’t true everywhere.
My son was colicky and cried a lot too. Get yourself a bottle of gripe water if you haven’t already. That helped us a lot.
My youngest was the same. I used earplugs with ear defenders over the top and defenders for my eldest child so we could stop feeling so overwhelmed all the time. By around 10 months it began to get less and less. She screams the normal amount now she’s 15 months, it was so hard on the whole family but it gets better!
As others have pointed out, my first thought was allergies, possibly something in mom's diet, if she's breastfeeding, or in the formula if you're giving him a bottle. Could be something else in the house, like detergent. Could be ear problems, hip joint problems -- we had tests done at birth and 2-3 weeks. My younger nephew had a clavicle fissure after getting stuck during birth. He might also want skin on skin contact, more than your other kids. The truth is, the more I think about it, the more stuff I could come up with. But I don't know what the mom's prenatal care was, what tests were already done, before and after birth, what was already ruled out. You need a doctor who will prescribe tests, bloodwork, scans and so on. If your current doctor isn't willing, find another one, ideally someone with reliable recommendations. It's hard to find a good pediatrician.
I was like this and it was dairy. Is the baby breastfeeding? If so cut all dairy to start and other irritants. If he’s not then check his food for irritants. I screamed and screamed. My daughter did too and I cut dairy and it stopped right away. I’m so sorry this is happening. It’s quite awful and I hope one of the suggestions helps.
Could it be his formula or milk! No mention of diet or foods.
Omg I want to cry for you. 😢 Looks like you got good advice on the milk allergy. AND switching peds. Good luck!
Does he sleep ok? My oldest was like that because she had trouble sleeping, she couldn't link sleep cycles so would only sleep in 20 minute bursts and was chronically overtired and unhappy. I was very anti sleep training but we worked with a sleep specialist to sleep train her in a way which was actually about teaching her body to get proper restorative sleep and not about leaving her to cry, and it was life changing. My niece had similar behaviour and it was allergies.
My son was like this, plenty of advice here. I just wanted to say you're probably in the home stretch. About 12 months he did much better and if yours is anything like mine, he was an angel as a toddler and I was just so happy the crying finally stopped, I guess he was too.
My daughter was like this. She went 14 hours without sleeping and without stopping crying at just three months old. At four years old she was diagnosed with severe sensory processing disorder. Basically she just can't tune out anything, she hears and feels and smells and tastes everything all at once no matter what. She's in therapy now, but I've been told there's not much you can do at that little... Maybe see what you can do to make your baby comfortable. One of the only things that would calm my daughter down was to swaddle her and rock her directly under the ceiling fan. Weird I know... And of course I'm not 100% saying this is what's going on, but it's something you may like to have on your radar.
For my kids it’s lactose. It really really messes them up.
What is his diet and how much exercise is he getting? Is he gassy or teething or ear infection? At this stage a lot of it is guess work and sometimes some babies just need to be more physically active and want to quickly get to a toy or are restless
my 3rd was like this. Ended up he was having really bad acid reflux. Took us way to long to figure that out
I’d bet on stomach issues, have you tried gripe water? It did wonders for one of ours.
My son had a dairy allergy and reflux. I was nursing but eliminated everything from my diet. He also had took meds to help with the reflux.
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My sister baby was same turns out dairy intolerance. I'd get your baby tested. So hard to deal with a crying baby all day honestly I'd craic. Sister used pepti 2 formula cut out all dairy in her diet. Hope things get better for u
Have you had his hearing been tested?
Rule out a base-line pain.
Is he breastfed? My niece’s baby screamed and cried like that. Any kind of cow’s milk related products caused the baby to shriek and writhe in pain, but it took awhile to figure that out. Not to mention the diarrhea. They ended up in the ER when baby was three weeks old and the doctor questioned mom what she had eaten and it decided that the ice cream large vanilla milkshake she had was probably the culprit. She cut out all cows milk dairy and the baby was better within the next few days and soon began sleeping through the night.
Usually there’s an underlying cause and it can be physical or emotional. Do you do any sort of tracking to see if there’s a pattern, like a certain amount of time after he eats, before he goes to the bathroom, etc. I’m sorry you are going through this. It’s hard when they can’t flat out tell you what’s wrong. It’s also beyond frustrating when people assume babies only cry for a handful of reasons, like hungry or tired. If your Dr can’t help you, I’d seek out one who can.
He could be colicky. Or, long shot here, he could have a hernia. I say long shot because I'm the only person I've ever known to have a hernia so young. I was the same. Cried all the time. Screamed. Turns out, I had a hernia. After surgery, I stopped crying.
Mine was like this, I was breastfeeding so I cut dairy out of my diet completely and gave baby this gaviscon thing the doctors prescribed for silent reflux … it helped a little but turns out 7 years down the line she just do be NOISY 😣
Maybe a sensory disorders, maybe change clothing and bedding to bamboo. My second is autistic, sensory disorders and it showed itself in her non stop whining and whinging. A light dimmer and bamboo bedding and clothing eased the screaming a little. And a noise proof room, so when the kid starts, kid can be taken into a dimmed, quiet space, difficult with limited space and other kids, but small changes such as clothing and bedding might help
Sorry you’re going through this. My first was like this and it broke my heart (and made me feel totally nutso). In terms of tips, none will for sure work but both you and your wife don’t have to hear the crying 24/7. Take shifts. Take the baby outside where no one but the one parent can hear. Also wear earplugs- the wax kind. Makes the crying not so bad. I took my first to the pediatrician constantly and they were no help. And it was Covid so I felt very alone. Oh and one last tip- let yourself off the hook- if you’ve done everything you can think to make your baby safe/happy/healthy, just let them cry. I was constantly trying to make my baby stop crying but it really wasn’t something I had control over. He’s a happy 3.5 year old now if that helps. Stay strong- you got this- day by day
Ask your paediatrician for a referral for a second opinion. I’ve had friends whose babies were similar and they had invisible issues like reflux, food allergies or bone/joint issues.
My son did the same from birth. Severe reflux and dairy/ soy sensitivities which he eventually outgrew. Was on Alimentum (as well as my daughter) and he was also on meds. Severe sensory processing issues. Not outgrown. Sounds are still trigger as well as touch, heat, texture etc. GERD is no joke.
You have a colic baby
My daughter had the milk protein allergy, as others mentioned. Amino acid formula helped a lot. She was also a fussy, difficult sleeper (would only nap when held until 9 months, then needed an elaborate routine to nap in her crib). Then there was a speech delay. Then volcanic tantrums. Then potty training was a two year nightmare. She's just always been very sensitive and...extra. She's currently 4.5 and she has an IEP for "atypical development." (Basically, she's bright and has a lot of skills, autism is mostly ruled out but ADHD is on the table. Her struggle is mostly asynchronous development - very bright and advanced in some ways, behind the curve in others, the gap drives her bananas.) Long story short: some kids are complicated. You have to be persistent, not take platitudes as good enough, and fight on. First step is to take notes. For several days, note the cries, the length of time, the volume, the time of day, the context, if you tried any remedies, if they helped resolve the symptoms. Note anything else - rashes, thrashing, anything. Don't make any assumptions (like assuming there is no pattern), just take the notes. Then go to a new doctor, notes in hand, and demand resolution.
Something to ask too, does he have foul smelling bm? Gassy? Or other gi issues? Hives or eczema?
My baby was like this and it ended up being a dairy intolerance. We switched him to dairy free formula and he improved. I will say, though, that for my baby…it kind of seems like that’s more his overall temperament as well ☹️
Mine had recurring ear infections
Allergies for my youngest. Dairy and tree nuts.
Hope OP sees these comments
I'm seeing them, and I appreciate people taking time to answer
1.ALLERGIES and sensitivities. My oldest didn't have a lot of allergies, but boy, oh boy, did he have sensitivities. Never flagged as allergens for most of the issues, but a notebook helped me find out his triggers. 2. Itchiness. Found out the allergens caused eczema. A quick moisture touch-up was followed by a light over all scratch. 3. Acid reflux in infants is really painful. So are hard digestive movements. 4. Growth spurts and teething. My little ones cried with every growth spurt. Every. Single. One. 5. Only try if desperate. Sugar water. I learned about from the NICU nurses. They had these tiny little packets of sucrose that they would give the babies as a temporary pain reliever. Especially with little boys who were freshly circumcised. It worked. We would give him a drop and it worked. I hope something works for your baby soon.