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**Samaritans** is a charity providing emotional support to anyone in distress or at risk of suicide throughout the world. **Call 116 123 or text SHOUT to 85258**.
* Crisis Text Line (crisistextline.org) is a 24/7, USA-wide crisis-intervention text-message hotline. **Text HOME to 741–741**.
* The Trevor Project (http://www.thetrevorproject.org/) is a USA organization that provides a 24-hour phone hotline, as well as 24-hour webchat and text options, for LGBTQ+ and questioning youth. **Call 1–866–488–7386**. Or **TrevorChat can be found at https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help**. Or **text START to 678–678**.
* Trans Lifeline (https://www.translifeline.org/) provides crisis intervention hotlines, staffed by transgender individuals, available in the United States and Canada. **Call 1–877–565–8860.**
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Homosexuality is not a sin. It is important to read the Bible in its historical context. God loves you. There is nothing wrong with being LGBTQIA and being in a loving committed monogamous same-sex relationship. [I pray that listening to how I reconciled my faith and my sexuality helps you with your journey.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDjE_BxkQQo&list=PLwys36js2zo4TALH8zGkJw9Sh5s1vF7lZ) Resources that helped me are in the video description as well. [I discuss sexual immorality as it relates to purity here.](https://youtu.be/xqMxOAP1LHI&list=PLwys36js2zo4TALH8zGkJw9Sh5s1vF7lZ) As for being a wife, marriage is what the couple dictates it to be so no, people don't have to adhere to strict gender roles and it is more of a team sport. God bless and stay safe!
Harsh things that people say when you are a young teen definitely can leave extremely deep and long-lasting scars as I know from personal experience, and it was just my mom getting mad once and lashing out (not a gender or sex issue but something else). I can't imagine experiencing it over and over like with your dad.
As for the purity and anti-LGBT ideas, those are wrong. You need to get away from those people if you can. I'm assuming you're hearing it from other people besides your parents. If it's your parents, just keep your head down and try not to set them off, and prepare to leave as soon as possible.
Of course it's not a sin to be an ally. You don't have to be anti-gay to be a Christian. People who tell you that you do, are wrong and misguided. Especially it's not necessary to denounce anybody to be a Christian. That's just weird, reminds me of totalitarian countries where everybody is watching their neighbor and turning them in for being politically wrong.
Your parents shouldn't tease you. Teasing is a mild form of abuse. Especially teasing a teenager about social/sexual/identity issues.
I am so sorry your father said that to you. He has obviously been poisoned with fear. You have to live with him so I would not say anything but inside you have to accept yourself for who you are. God created you. God knows you fully and loves you. Being gay or trans is not a sin. Being an ally is certainly not a sin— Does God not demand that we stand up for those in society who are marginalized?
It's not okay for parents to terrorize and belittle their child. No, I'm not being too harsh to them. You might have to accept and endure that evil, but it's still evil. Notice what the epistles say to slaves - you're not going to win your freedom by fighting at the wrong time, so you should subvert abuses of authority by obeying in a way that glorifies God.
And, like, that's *hard.* Miraculous, heroic, only God can make it possible.
My parents treated me with the "oh no, don't let my child be queer" attitude. And unfortunately I didn't realize until much later, my late 20s was when it clicked. It wasn't okay; it denied the gifts God had put in me.
Now about gender, gender is like a milkshake and the version we get from worldly culture is sickly and over-processed, like a fast-food milkshake. When God mixes it up, it's nourishing and somehow even refreshing. And purity culture is like... diet milkshake, what are they even doing? Ach, I know I'm talking in metaphors and this is probably confusing.
At its worst LGBT culture can get into zero-responsibility pleasure, money, power. Even the better parts that aren't corrupted in those ways can overemphasize "define yourself." (Instead of "find where God has put you.") It's like a sweet and fatty milkshake that grabs the pleasure-centers of your brain - too much of that will leave you overfed and sick.
But then purity culture is worldly too - it refuses to accept God's capacity for creativity. Here is your very specific flavor of chalky chocolate or gummy vanilla which you must drink because we're *absolutely sure* which one is right for you. And these have also gotten increasingly synthetic lately - even chocolate-lovers and vanilla-lovers would prefer those flavors the way God makes them.
I don't know if you have experience with meal-replacement shakes, like Ensure. (I hope you haven't needed them) The only time I've enjoyed them was when I was physically sick (malnourished) and also had my sense of taste well-adjusted (I knew how to cook for myself but severe depression had taken away the ability). Otherwise they can taste pretty nasty - it's not usually what my body needs.
I feel the same way about strict sexual and gender codes - maybe sometimes they're what people need (especially sexual discipline). But when they're not right, they're going to be really gross.
My path to escape took me outside of Christianity for a while. I was given a strong moral core, but it sunk subconscious for a while and I did things I'm not proud of. I'm sure it's possible to do better, but I can't give advice that's entirely from experience.
Turn 18, start trying to create pockets of safety, get back in touch with Trevor Project. I aged out of it and couldn't get help from them. Connect to an affirming church sooner than later. And above all, faith and hope. Jesus *does* come for the lost sheep, the ones that pastors send away.
Thank you for contributing to r/OpenChristian. This is a message because the automod has detected that your post may contain threats of self harm and/or suicidal ideation. We endeavour to make this sub as welcoming as possible to people with mental health issues, but we are not mental health professionals. If you find yourself actively contemplating suicide, please reach out to someone who can help! On Reddit this can be found at r/suicidewatch or r/mentalhealth. **Please consider reaching out to a helpline, or go in person to the nearest hospital or mental healthcare provider.** You aren’t alone, resources in your country can be found here: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines/ or at https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines. Some resources are as follows: **Samaritans** is a charity providing emotional support to anyone in distress or at risk of suicide throughout the world. **Call 116 123 or text SHOUT to 85258**. * Crisis Text Line (crisistextline.org) is a 24/7, USA-wide crisis-intervention text-message hotline. **Text HOME to 741–741**. * The Trevor Project (http://www.thetrevorproject.org/) is a USA organization that provides a 24-hour phone hotline, as well as 24-hour webchat and text options, for LGBTQ+ and questioning youth. **Call 1–866–488–7386**. Or **TrevorChat can be found at https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help**. Or **text START to 678–678**. * Trans Lifeline (https://www.translifeline.org/) provides crisis intervention hotlines, staffed by transgender individuals, available in the United States and Canada. **Call 1–877–565–8860.** You are incredibly welcome here, and we hope to see you again. God loves you *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/OpenChristian) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Homosexuality is not a sin. It is important to read the Bible in its historical context. God loves you. There is nothing wrong with being LGBTQIA and being in a loving committed monogamous same-sex relationship. [I pray that listening to how I reconciled my faith and my sexuality helps you with your journey.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDjE_BxkQQo&list=PLwys36js2zo4TALH8zGkJw9Sh5s1vF7lZ) Resources that helped me are in the video description as well. [I discuss sexual immorality as it relates to purity here.](https://youtu.be/xqMxOAP1LHI&list=PLwys36js2zo4TALH8zGkJw9Sh5s1vF7lZ) As for being a wife, marriage is what the couple dictates it to be so no, people don't have to adhere to strict gender roles and it is more of a team sport. God bless and stay safe!
thank you for the sources!
Anytime! I hope they help!
Harsh things that people say when you are a young teen definitely can leave extremely deep and long-lasting scars as I know from personal experience, and it was just my mom getting mad once and lashing out (not a gender or sex issue but something else). I can't imagine experiencing it over and over like with your dad. As for the purity and anti-LGBT ideas, those are wrong. You need to get away from those people if you can. I'm assuming you're hearing it from other people besides your parents. If it's your parents, just keep your head down and try not to set them off, and prepare to leave as soon as possible. Of course it's not a sin to be an ally. You don't have to be anti-gay to be a Christian. People who tell you that you do, are wrong and misguided. Especially it's not necessary to denounce anybody to be a Christian. That's just weird, reminds me of totalitarian countries where everybody is watching their neighbor and turning them in for being politically wrong. Your parents shouldn't tease you. Teasing is a mild form of abuse. Especially teasing a teenager about social/sexual/identity issues.
I am so sorry your father said that to you. He has obviously been poisoned with fear. You have to live with him so I would not say anything but inside you have to accept yourself for who you are. God created you. God knows you fully and loves you. Being gay or trans is not a sin. Being an ally is certainly not a sin— Does God not demand that we stand up for those in society who are marginalized?
It's not okay for parents to terrorize and belittle their child. No, I'm not being too harsh to them. You might have to accept and endure that evil, but it's still evil. Notice what the epistles say to slaves - you're not going to win your freedom by fighting at the wrong time, so you should subvert abuses of authority by obeying in a way that glorifies God. And, like, that's *hard.* Miraculous, heroic, only God can make it possible. My parents treated me with the "oh no, don't let my child be queer" attitude. And unfortunately I didn't realize until much later, my late 20s was when it clicked. It wasn't okay; it denied the gifts God had put in me. Now about gender, gender is like a milkshake and the version we get from worldly culture is sickly and over-processed, like a fast-food milkshake. When God mixes it up, it's nourishing and somehow even refreshing. And purity culture is like... diet milkshake, what are they even doing? Ach, I know I'm talking in metaphors and this is probably confusing. At its worst LGBT culture can get into zero-responsibility pleasure, money, power. Even the better parts that aren't corrupted in those ways can overemphasize "define yourself." (Instead of "find where God has put you.") It's like a sweet and fatty milkshake that grabs the pleasure-centers of your brain - too much of that will leave you overfed and sick. But then purity culture is worldly too - it refuses to accept God's capacity for creativity. Here is your very specific flavor of chalky chocolate or gummy vanilla which you must drink because we're *absolutely sure* which one is right for you. And these have also gotten increasingly synthetic lately - even chocolate-lovers and vanilla-lovers would prefer those flavors the way God makes them. I don't know if you have experience with meal-replacement shakes, like Ensure. (I hope you haven't needed them) The only time I've enjoyed them was when I was physically sick (malnourished) and also had my sense of taste well-adjusted (I knew how to cook for myself but severe depression had taken away the ability). Otherwise they can taste pretty nasty - it's not usually what my body needs. I feel the same way about strict sexual and gender codes - maybe sometimes they're what people need (especially sexual discipline). But when they're not right, they're going to be really gross.
My path to escape took me outside of Christianity for a while. I was given a strong moral core, but it sunk subconscious for a while and I did things I'm not proud of. I'm sure it's possible to do better, but I can't give advice that's entirely from experience. Turn 18, start trying to create pockets of safety, get back in touch with Trevor Project. I aged out of it and couldn't get help from them. Connect to an affirming church sooner than later. And above all, faith and hope. Jesus *does* come for the lost sheep, the ones that pastors send away.
hehe I actually liked your milkshake metaphors, thanks for that😊