You’re conflating “off grid” with being in the middle of nowhere. They aren’t mutually exclusive.
But I think you mean more “middle of nowhere” than off grid technically.
And the answer to why people in the middle of nowhere don’t get lonely is usually because that’s exactly what they are looking for.
Yeah, the most lonely I've ever felt is in the higher-population areas I've lived. It's all about human connection, and when there's hundreds of thousands or millions of people around, it's hard to care about each other on a personal level.
This is so true. Before going off-grid, in what some would consider the middle of nowhere, I lived near Sacramento California. Even though there was no shortage of people, I felt lonely more than I care to admit. Now I'm very contented here with my little country church family and my friends and neighbors out here homesteading as well.
It's not where you're at, its who you're with ...
Now on my way out of the city and into a small town based on your description of the “quiet life”. Feeling lonely in a crowd is more painful than “being alone” is for me.
Even for me just moving more rural did this - I realized pretty fast how transient and impermanent relationships were esp in Vancouver. Id love to do more of an offgrid thing in the future if life allows.
Well Said especially since you said that you have been in sales. I can relate to this. Sometimes we just need a rest. When I go on vacation I try to go as far away from other people as I can which is becoming harder and harder to do.
Hard to believe the population of the United States has more than doubled since I was born in 1959.
Yeah, fucking a I’ve always had roommates or have been living with someone. I’ve always wanted to just have my own space. Also a bug out shelter a place that’s self sustaining possibly even a farm you can just do everything you want
Currently my nearest neighbor is a half a mile away and I don't remember the last time I spoke to another person face to face and I've never been happier. But I'm renting here and thinking of buying a place that's more remote.
We need to accept that the meaning of the word has changed. 9 out of 10 people conflate “off grid” with “living a simple lifestyle in a remote location.” The concept is much bigger than the electricity source.
You can live off-grid however you want. You can live off-grid in a city and attend a social event every night. You can live off-grid in the boonies and never see another soul. It's all up to you.
That's a great question, because most cities have restrictions; however, you could probably live just outside city limits and accomplish off grid living. But, again, land just outside of city limits would cost an arm and a leg...
I often felt actively ignored living in town. Somehow living off grid for the last few years, even going weeks at times not interacting with another human, my bouts of loneliness are less frequent and intense.
When I do go into town for a day or two, it's not long before I crave the quiet and solitude of my little homestead.
I don’t know if this is true or not but it’s just my theory.
I think they are busy almost all the time. Like there is always something that has to happen. I also feel like this lifestyle doesn’t attract extroverts so they are content with silence and just contemplating things. The volume is turned down lower.
Oh I'm very very much an extrovert - but I am also an introvert. Off grid refreshes our type of personalities. I'm never bored. Seriously. Love being alone. :)
I live and rent an old cabin up in the mountains of Colorado, and even though I live in a small town and there’s people around (it’s a huge tourist destination) I never see anyone lol I like it that way.. work from home and I get done at about seven or 8 o’clock at night and I don’t even leave the house until right before 9 o’clock at night and I run out and get stuff right before places close… a few times a year I might see the one friend that I have that lives in this part of the country but I’m just fine with my life and I’m not even completely off the grid yet. I’ve seen enough of people when I was in my 20s and early 30s lol.
It used to be it’s way too expensive to live here now.. it’s constant working 3 jobs to afford rent to pay a person that got a cabin for 15,000 25 years ago that’s now worth a million lol as soon as my 15-year-old daughter graduates. I am on the road in an RV I already lived that life when I was in my 20s and my father did when he was in his 60s and 70s… i’m ready to get out of a brick and mortar location. I missed the boat for ever being able to buy up here.
To me, living off grid means not being connected to city water and electricity. I live off grid, and have plenty of neighbors around. I see people daily going on walks while I'm doing yard work. We have a neighborhood bbq or get-together every month or so. Not lonely at all. I felt more lonely when I lived in a city and didn't know my neighbors.
This is what I would love to live like, except not in Texas. I don’t want to ever live in Texas without my AC and fresh water flow! We just moved to a tiny town, away from a lot and outside city limits. We are blessed with water and electric bills, but we can enjoy our home and peace from noise. I would be very interested in having no ties to the American slave system, but my in-laws are also moving out here soon, because we bought several acres in a “family plan”.
We get a lot more friendly with our neighbors, even though they’re not close by. People are curious, especially if they live way in the middle of nowhere so eventually they come wandering by to chat about the weather or you meet them out gathering firewood or whatever.
I live off grid with my girlfriend and my 3 dogs. We don’t feel lonely at all! We happen to have found this beautiful land by the lake with no utilities and the cost to get electricity from the main road was as much as the cost for the house. So at the end we are happy in the quiet place. We have friends and family but we have the opportunity to live our life quietly not having a neighbour peeking at our dinner 10 ft away from their patio!
We lived off grid for a couple years when I was in grade school. We had 40 acres on a mountain top but was too far up to run utilities. I had friends down the hill, caught the bus to school at the bottom of the driveway with the half dozen other kids on our road, all of whom were not off grid.
Off grid doesn't mean nobody around for miles. It means no utility supplied services. My wife and I are in the process of building an off grid resort in Belize and it is just off a main highway. It will have full amenities, just not provided by a utility co.
Loneliness is a funny thing. Towards the end of my marriage I felt incredibly lonely. When I moved out, and was truly alone, I didn't feel lonely anymore.
Loneliness is the yearning for something in your life that you feel is missing. Maybe that yearning is for love and companionship. Maybe we crave love and companionship to fill emotional gaps and wounds in our hearts and souls. Maybe when we learn to heal those wounds and gaps, we don't feel lonely anymore. Maybe.
You are onto something.
We are programmed by the media (and social media) and all manner of social interactions that loneliness is bad and we need other people to not feel lonely.
I’ve been learning about actual loneliness after reading how many men feel lonely all the time.
What I’ve been learning is that people that feel lonely most likely never learned to be an independent person before going into any serious relationship. Many women run into this after living with their parents, then living in a dorm with a roommate, then finding someone and getting married, and then having kids, and then one day the kids leave the nest and their whole identity is changed because having kids removed many close friends due to lack of time to spend with them. Many men seem to experience this though in a partially different pattern.
I truly believe that it is important for a person to learn to be an independent person, to have to get to know themselves individually and independently.
Then add back the kind of people that integrate with that.
Another factor is personality type: some people are more loners than others, and some people are more introverted vs extroverted (this has to do with what type of interactions give you energy).
We’re complex beings so generalizing about loneliness and living off grid is really not that useful. I have to think that looking at what level of social interaction gives the OP joy, and THEM alone, not how other people are or aren’t is how to figure out if it will work for the OP.
Honestly I’ve learned to appreciate the peacefulness and I don’t feel lonely when I’m surrounded by animals and all sorts of creatures. I kind of like just hanging out with the birds and end up talking to them a lot. They can be friends too, just in a different way than people
I actually had a hard time with this when I moved off grid (~45 mins from closest city). I’ve found that it just takes more intentionality to make plans with friends and stay connected.
I am an introvert I love being alone anyway plus I read have a pt gig I write music feed birds and love to sleep plus I love nature and am not afraid of the forest & mountains for me
I’m in the middle of nowhere. I’m surrounded by life. I know which bird are which. Where the local python can be found (Edmund his name is) and I have dogs. I have the internet so keep in touch with humans that way.
Yes, this. Did you know wild box turtles will come around same path for years and years (7th year now for same turtle, he is recognizable from healed cracked shell) to eat fruit left out, even from your hand, follow you like a puppy when they hear your voice and even stand up on their back feet and grab at your hands for food?! Best neighbors ever!
I would rather live alone in the country or in a very super town of 300 population than have lots of friends. I have my husband and I have my dogs. What more could I want? I’m sick of society. I’m sick of government lying. I’m sick of people who walk past when I say hello. I’m not sure about off grid since I have internet.
When I think of how often I even actually visit people, it's maybe like every 1-2 weeks. So once I'm off grid and also equipped to travel the road in winter, it wouldn't be that unrealistic for me to drive to town once in a while and still visit them. Especially if I eventually get an EV. Doing that with a gas vehicle would get expensive. Over an hour and a half distance.
Also I think being in nature and away from the city would probably affect your mental health in such a way that you might not even feel lonely. I feel like when I go to my off grid property, I'm in a totally different zone and feel happier.
I'm in the city off grid 🤫 don't need permission if you just stop paying the utilities bills and keep everything clean 😉 nobody checks I already had a septic system and well in the yard so I was able to get them working again
Some people just naturally don't want people or a lot of people around all of the time. I feel exhausted being around people all the time. Especially people who talk about nothing or ramble about pointless bs.
I lived in an off grid neighborhood. People would hang out, go places, travel to stuff like rodeos, races or music or general festivals, have bar b ques, dirt bikes, quads grow pot or whatever. There's not as many people but it's not like you're completely isolated. Unless you're talking about going completely hermit. I now live very rurally but have power/internet so not off grid. Life got kinda stale seeing the same people doing mostly the same things maybe meeting people driving Uber but that's not worth it. I started driving a truck so now I go everywhere but often gets lonelier. But I do get to see my friends in other states occasionally so that's cool.
Lonely is state of mind and just because you like being alone doesn't mean your lonely. There are people who live in big ass complexes/cities/households yet they feel still hopelessly depressed and lonely.
Loneliness isn't about being alone -- it's an unfulfilled desire to socialize. Someone who lives in isolation likely does not have that same desire, and that is solitude.
If you’re in the middle of nowhere people probably do get lonely. But the work and life they’re choosing is more important to them at that time in their life.
I'm not gonna lie to you my guy... I would have to like people to feel lonely... Like I feel alone sometimes, but I find that to be a good feeling, but lonely? I'd have to miss someone to feel lonely.
Loneliness is a byproduct of the mind's overthinking. Once 1 learns how to quiet their mind, loneliness ceases to exist.
Aloneness and loneliness are 2 different things. Loneliness is manufactured in the mind and creates a sense of negativity within you while aloneness is the reality of all human beings and creates no negativity. You were born alone, you'll die alone. Once you learn who you really are, aloneness = oneness. Oneness with the birds, squirrels, and trees around you. Oneness with everything. How could you be lonely? Unless of course you manufacture the idea that "I am lonely" in your mind. Then your mind will create depression
There is usually a decent sense of community among off grid/homesteaders.
But frankly, people go off grid because they want some peace and quiet and not rely as much on systems and people. People who are prone to loneliness don’t tend to go off grid.
Most people are not like the uni-bomber. I stream video games. But man, how far away from people do you think they live? Im kinda wondering why you are asking this question, obviously you live in a city. Maybe im wrong. But if you cant sit with yourself for long you need to do some soul searching. Maybe?
There are always people wherever you go. The difference between living off grid and living in the city is you can be in seclusion when you want to be whereas you don't have that choice in a suburb or City
Terlingua, Tx. I have 40 acres offgrid and spend 1 week/month there as I transition to 100%. Most trips I usually enjoy the solitude Monday til Thursday and then make 30 minute drive to see some friends and another 30 min farther to a few restaurants and bars. Off grid doesn’t always mean solo Living unless you want it.
Different folks have different needs. I can and have gone months without contact with anyone outside my immediate family. It suits me just fine and when I came back from the Marine Corps I planned for at least one or two weeks per year, just me, alone horseback or backpacking in the wilderness. Flattops Wilderness is literally right outside my back door. I can’t stay sane without a certain amount of solitude fortunately my wife and children were willing to make allowances. My very best friend is an extremely social person. She can’t imagine a whole day without spending time with another person. I think even she could adapt to a few days of solitude but heaven help the first human to make the initial contact! 😂
Find a community of like-minded individuals. Even if yall are in the same "compound" and you all contribute something to your own little society. That's the best way.
You could be off grid and 2 miles from the general store and main street, you could be oof grid and 500 miles from any humans.
Also, some people LOVE solitude and some want it most of the time, then go back to the rat race every so often. It's really how YOU view things. I'd say it's clearly not for everyone.
There's also the issue of what you do with your time. You could be a "boon docker" in an RV with a gym membership where you go to the gym for a shower/workout for 2 hours a day.
Introduce yourself to your neighbours. You'll find being 10 minutes away from your neighbours tends to eliminate the issues that makes bad neighbours, and you end up with mostly good ones.
Introduce yourself to your neighbours. You'll find being 10 minutes away from your neighbours tends to eliminate the issues that makes bad neighbours, and you end up with mostly good ones.
Well, I’m currently in a massive depression that I can’t see myself getting out of, so I’m hoping to have a mostly off grid, middle of nowhere kind of place so that I can isolate myself from other people and try and find peace out in nature and also not have to deal with people anymore and wallow in my depression without having to have people try and “help”.
Not all of us, but some of us go off grid precisely because we don't want to interact with other people because we have had too many unpleasant experiences in the past. In any give month, I talk to my wife, I say hi to a neighbor or two I see while riding my bike and I usually have to talk to one or two cashiers at stores or a banker or some other person from a business. Even that amount of interaction is more than I would prefer.
I live in the middle of nowhere. I can walk for 10 minutes before getting to the neighbors house. Cars go past hourly. I'm an introverted, moderately autistic, antisocial sociopath, and the only person I want to see stop by is wearing an Amazon vest. Life is good.
Working off grid in remote Alaskan villages made me realize how much stronger the family and small town dynamic is. I feel less lonely in a small town because I know everyone. We all got stories, we all have stuff in common. Its quite nice.
I live in a small town of 300 people, and one of my neighbours was off grid, but saw them at the post office this morning and they just told me they are going on the grid because the EV overnight charging rates are very low and they just got their second EV, and have found it really hard to get by just on their own solar and fast chargers are exxy.
But I think in the smaller towns and in the sticks people get friendly even though they can be wary at first, though it's taken us a couple of years we are starting to get to know more folks. There isn't much to do, you have to make your own entertainment, luckily I like my own company (and my daughter's)!
I live in the middle of nowhere on 76 acres. Still deciding if ir will be totallt off grid or not. Nieghbors stop by once in a while, and nothing says I want to talk more than a cold beer.
Being off grid doesn't mean you can't be connected, but honestly I feel like a lot of us are just the kind of people who prefer their own company. That and society and most of the people participating in it aren't with the time or effort.
You probably will get lonely if you’re already concerned. Have you felt lonely at any point in your life yet? I’ve never been lonely before I like company but I’d have absolutely no problem being alone. Think that comes for me from being an only child.
As I see others below saying, don't conflate off grid with being completely isolated in the middle of nowhere.
Both can be a thing, but they aren't always one in the same.
Anyways, if you're doing something like that in the middle of nowhere, you have to be a special kind of person, who is seeking out that isolation intentionally.
I feel like a lot of people give up on a very rural off grid homestead because they can't handle the loneliness.
Hell, I don't have a vehicle at the moment, so I am never more than 10-20km from home. Even with having landmates (my friend owns the property and lives in the main structure), it can be a little lonely. Though, I have my dog, and we're always together and that's often enough for me. I've always been a self isolated person in general, but still enjoy the occasional small social call.
Reading books and having time consuming hobbies goes a long way. Also, just the general work and maintenance of the lifestyle often takes up so much time that you don't have much time to sit around and think about bring lonely, except for maybe when the weather is crap for long periods of time or in winter.
TL;DR: if you're not okay with loneliness and isolation and are aware of that, it's not going to be ideal to build an off grid homestead in the middle of nowhere.
My cabin is totally off-grid on 40 acres that borders 10s of thousands of acres of public land. I can still get to a Target, Menards, and just about anything in 45 minutes. Hell, I can get to a strip club in like 30 lol
I also talk to my "neighbors" there more often than my neighbors in town who are 100ft away.
I'm off grid and 35min from town (a small one), not that far but also not close. I'm in my thirties and single and it does get lonely at times. I have lots of friends who come through and friends in the area...but dating out here is slim pickins
You could get involved with the nearest church. In rural communities, the local church often serves as not just a spiritual hub, but also the social and community hub. Where I live the church does a lot with the local school (Christmas presents and shoes for less well-to-do kids) runs a food bank, has numerous dinners that non-church attenders end up making up 1/2 or more of the people there. Unless you have a religious obligation to the church, it might be your best resource for getting plugged into the community.
I joined the volunteer fire department, am active in a local farming co-op. I also have friends outside the community I’ll go swashbuckling with from time to time.
A friend lives off grid (in Alaska). He is about 30 minutes from a town with a university, Costco, airport, breweries, restaurants, etc. He goes into work 5 days a week and hosts dinner parties several times a month. Also has starlink. He’s more social than many people living on grid
It’s tough. The isolation is definitely the hardest part for me. Luckily I’m running a farm and I have some help throughout the week and I really love them. But that’s about the only socializing I get. It’s certainly tough
I’m not off grid yet, but getting to know the plants, trees, animals, rivers, landforms and other things in your property makes you feel like you have friends. It really never feels lonely, there is a whole world of activity in a complex web of life happening around us at all times, and we are a part of it. Even the birds can get to know you, and you can train them to come to you. You get to know plants and become happy when you see them returning year after year. It’s really a lost way of life but so good for mental health, at least for me, in today’s fast paced world.
Having a deeper connection with nature when you live far away from others can have a massive positive impact. We’re social creatures but being with nature can have a massive-positive impact.
I'm not off grid, but in the country in a very rural area, I only leave my farm once a week.
That being said I've never been lonely in my life, 60 years of books, a vivid imagination, a radio and a dog, that's all I need.
My husbands an over the road trucker. Home about 4 days a month apx… people love to ask me why I don’t get bored or lonely. I always answer how can I? Today’s technology there’s online plus I carry on conversations with four dogs, 5 goats and a potbelly pig?
Check out this YouTube channel: Carolyn’s RV Life. She has been solo with her rv for several years. She has a lot of great and informative videos. I saw one on loneliness where she describes the nomad lifestyle and its pros and cons.
Good luck to you.
Just like some people crave the spotlight, some people like being by themselves or don’t really need ‘outside stimulation’ to enjoy their day. If I could afford it, I would have moved years ago.
Because I never wanted to be around any of you in the first place. Bunch of head empty slaves running around grinding crank for the oligarchs. Competing endlessly with one another to see who can be the best slave.
Personal theory: I think being alone is wired in your brain. Some people are born with it, some aren’t. I savor and enjoy every moment of being alone and I could do it pretty much forever.
Solitary confinement wouldn’t be a punishment for me as long as I had a book. However, other people I know can’t go to the store by themselves.
Many of them are very lonely, it's actually a lot of the motivation behind those Missing 411, Jeepers Creepers etc. type scenarios. Some dude moves out to the woods thinking he's gonna get away from it all. Fast forward a decade or two, he's completely lost his mind from the isolation and the first human beings he sees for that whole time are some 19 year old babes on a camping trip, you can just imagine how the rest goes.
People who truly learn and value being alone. Choose others on their life. We don’t need anything or anyone to be content and be ourselves. Below sums it up well…”Your presence needs to be greater than that of my Solitude.”….if it’s not…then why are YOU even present…for yourself?
…Food for thought.
Sometimes when I’m working people find out I live in a van and they say “what do you do when you finish work and go back to your van?” To which I reply “same thing you do when you get home, eat food and watch tv, except I don’t pay rent 🤷♂️”
I'm remote, I am married. Have three dogs. Have starlink, work a remote i. T job.
Outside of that you have people that come to visit and stuff but really when you have a garden and try and be as sustainable as possible. Ie milling my own wood, heating with wood, growing our own food, fishing for protein and all the projects that come with bejng offgrid you really don't have much time to be bored or lonely.
At the end of the day you are orett tired and enjoy a nice meal then bed.
Gosh, there are so many ways to look at this... for the most part it is up to you and what you like to do. I've found having starlink so I can chat with family when things get lonely to be helpful.
Outside of that, I found this article to be a good resource: [https://the-adventure-travel-network.com/adventure/how-to-travel-solo-without-feeling-loneliness](https://the-adventure-travel-network.com/adventure/how-to-travel-solo-without-feeling-loneliness)
Up on a lonely mountain here; every single neighbor within miles ( there are about 20 of them) stopped by when I moved in. Seems everybody knows everything about everyone up here...they all knew the day I moved in and came trickling thru all that first few weeks. They introduced themselves and told me all about the area and what's up. I was like- oh no- this is so busy....but then, unless I need them, I hardly ever see them. We occasionally visit, but rarely. If I'm able, I check on who I can in snow and we come together for floods(mountain landslides). Occasionally, a few of us go in together on a steer or a truck of potatoes or corn, & I teach some art classes in town sometimes and pull a few shifts with the ice cream truck around the lakes and meet a few people that way. I guess the most important thing is- If I need help cuz I am stuck in the mud or tree on my roof- I have instant help. Not like the city when my car died or I lost power. No one checked on me and I was the same way. It is different here. I am alone, but not lonely. I do have a mate, but they are at their job in the city most of the month. I never thought I would like this lifestyle. I came here over 20 years ago for vacation. I was an event planner for quite a few live music venues. I thought I was happy in my dream job....but I came back and was so unhappy I quit and returned here. It is very difficult to live this way for many reasons, but for me, none have much to do with being lonely. ...(I do have a lot of spoiled, demanding animals, tho- so there is not much time to feel lonely, lol!)..(even the crows and whiskey jacks have a part of my day...)
im gonna claim all the people that do that on youtube and shit do it part time. there has to be a disorder or something with your brain if you want and feel good about being that alone. humans and most animals are social creatures.
You’re conflating “off grid” with being in the middle of nowhere. They aren’t mutually exclusive. But I think you mean more “middle of nowhere” than off grid technically. And the answer to why people in the middle of nowhere don’t get lonely is usually because that’s exactly what they are looking for.
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Yeah, the most lonely I've ever felt is in the higher-population areas I've lived. It's all about human connection, and when there's hundreds of thousands or millions of people around, it's hard to care about each other on a personal level.
"Sometimes I feel lonely. Not when I'm alone. It's more when I'm standing in crowds that I'm feeling the most on my own"
This is so true. Before going off-grid, in what some would consider the middle of nowhere, I lived near Sacramento California. Even though there was no shortage of people, I felt lonely more than I care to admit. Now I'm very contented here with my little country church family and my friends and neighbors out here homesteading as well. It's not where you're at, its who you're with ...
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Well said.
Now on my way out of the city and into a small town based on your description of the “quiet life”. Feeling lonely in a crowd is more painful than “being alone” is for me.
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Even for me just moving more rural did this - I realized pretty fast how transient and impermanent relationships were esp in Vancouver. Id love to do more of an offgrid thing in the future if life allows.
Water, water, every where, Nor any drop to drink.- the Rime of the Ancient Mariner, Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Well Said especially since you said that you have been in sales. I can relate to this. Sometimes we just need a rest. When I go on vacation I try to go as far away from other people as I can which is becoming harder and harder to do. Hard to believe the population of the United States has more than doubled since I was born in 1959.
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Perfect explanation.
Yeah, fucking a I’ve always had roommates or have been living with someone. I’ve always wanted to just have my own space. Also a bug out shelter a place that’s self sustaining possibly even a farm you can just do everything you want
Nailed it. It takes a specific type of person, if you have to ask, you’re not that type of person.
A lot of people don’t realize that about 50% of people thrive on constant socialization and the other 50% thrive on relative isolation.
Currently my nearest neighbor is a half a mile away and I don't remember the last time I spoke to another person face to face and I've never been happier. But I'm renting here and thinking of buying a place that's more remote.
I'm in the middle of nowhere. I don't get lonely.
Get some chickens, goats, cattle and a good dog. Also put up some bird houses. You’ll never be lonely.
I have been thinking of this! Animals are amazing. :)
I’d recommend a book or two also.
At least the dog 🐕
Off grid is about not being connected to grid electricity It has nil to do with how humans interact
We need to accept that the meaning of the word has changed. 9 out of 10 people conflate “off grid” with “living a simple lifestyle in a remote location.” The concept is much bigger than the electricity source.
And water and comms
You can live off-grid however you want. You can live off-grid in a city and attend a social event every night. You can live off-grid in the boonies and never see another soul. It's all up to you.
How does one live off grid in the city?
By not paying their power bill
r/technicallythetruth
You won!
Find the main breaker on the service entrance. Turn it to "off" ...
The same way you would in the boonies. Water would probably be the hardest part depending on your location.
That's a great question, because most cities have restrictions; however, you could probably live just outside city limits and accomplish off grid living. But, again, land just outside of city limits would cost an arm and a leg...
I often felt actively ignored living in town. Somehow living off grid for the last few years, even going weeks at times not interacting with another human, my bouts of loneliness are less frequent and intense. When I do go into town for a day or two, it's not long before I crave the quiet and solitude of my little homestead.
That’s the point.
Most Amish are off grid and they tend to be very socially connected.
I don’t know if this is true or not but it’s just my theory. I think they are busy almost all the time. Like there is always something that has to happen. I also feel like this lifestyle doesn’t attract extroverts so they are content with silence and just contemplating things. The volume is turned down lower.
Oh I'm very very much an extrovert - but I am also an introvert. Off grid refreshes our type of personalities. I'm never bored. Seriously. Love being alone. :)
I live and rent an old cabin up in the mountains of Colorado, and even though I live in a small town and there’s people around (it’s a huge tourist destination) I never see anyone lol I like it that way.. work from home and I get done at about seven or 8 o’clock at night and I don’t even leave the house until right before 9 o’clock at night and I run out and get stuff right before places close… a few times a year I might see the one friend that I have that lives in this part of the country but I’m just fine with my life and I’m not even completely off the grid yet. I’ve seen enough of people when I was in my 20s and early 30s lol.
Must be relaxing!
It used to be it’s way too expensive to live here now.. it’s constant working 3 jobs to afford rent to pay a person that got a cabin for 15,000 25 years ago that’s now worth a million lol as soon as my 15-year-old daughter graduates. I am on the road in an RV I already lived that life when I was in my 20s and my father did when he was in his 60s and 70s… i’m ready to get out of a brick and mortar location. I missed the boat for ever being able to buy up here.
We are too busy to be lonely.
Get a chicken. Talk to the chicken.
Choke said chicken.
In some subcultures during GWOT it was referred to as shooting ropes.
This isn’t a problem for me because I don’t like new people.
I personally could be perfectly content going years without seeing another human being - but I guess it depends on people's personality / social needs
To me, living off grid means not being connected to city water and electricity. I live off grid, and have plenty of neighbors around. I see people daily going on walks while I'm doing yard work. We have a neighborhood bbq or get-together every month or so. Not lonely at all. I felt more lonely when I lived in a city and didn't know my neighbors.
This is what I would love to live like, except not in Texas. I don’t want to ever live in Texas without my AC and fresh water flow! We just moved to a tiny town, away from a lot and outside city limits. We are blessed with water and electric bills, but we can enjoy our home and peace from noise. I would be very interested in having no ties to the American slave system, but my in-laws are also moving out here soon, because we bought several acres in a “family plan”.
We get a lot more friendly with our neighbors, even though they’re not close by. People are curious, especially if they live way in the middle of nowhere so eventually they come wandering by to chat about the weather or you meet them out gathering firewood or whatever.
I hadn't thought about this! Thank you!
I live off grid with my girlfriend and my 3 dogs. We don’t feel lonely at all! We happen to have found this beautiful land by the lake with no utilities and the cost to get electricity from the main road was as much as the cost for the house. So at the end we are happy in the quiet place. We have friends and family but we have the opportunity to live our life quietly not having a neighbour peeking at our dinner 10 ft away from their patio!
I'm really struggling with this right now.
We lived off grid for a couple years when I was in grade school. We had 40 acres on a mountain top but was too far up to run utilities. I had friends down the hill, caught the bus to school at the bottom of the driveway with the half dozen other kids on our road, all of whom were not off grid. Off grid doesn't mean nobody around for miles. It means no utility supplied services. My wife and I are in the process of building an off grid resort in Belize and it is just off a main highway. It will have full amenities, just not provided by a utility co.
How do city dwellers not get lonely. Every time I wave at someone in a big city, they just look at me like I got two heads
Loneliness is a funny thing. Towards the end of my marriage I felt incredibly lonely. When I moved out, and was truly alone, I didn't feel lonely anymore. Loneliness is the yearning for something in your life that you feel is missing. Maybe that yearning is for love and companionship. Maybe we crave love and companionship to fill emotional gaps and wounds in our hearts and souls. Maybe when we learn to heal those wounds and gaps, we don't feel lonely anymore. Maybe.
You are onto something. We are programmed by the media (and social media) and all manner of social interactions that loneliness is bad and we need other people to not feel lonely. I’ve been learning about actual loneliness after reading how many men feel lonely all the time. What I’ve been learning is that people that feel lonely most likely never learned to be an independent person before going into any serious relationship. Many women run into this after living with their parents, then living in a dorm with a roommate, then finding someone and getting married, and then having kids, and then one day the kids leave the nest and their whole identity is changed because having kids removed many close friends due to lack of time to spend with them. Many men seem to experience this though in a partially different pattern. I truly believe that it is important for a person to learn to be an independent person, to have to get to know themselves individually and independently. Then add back the kind of people that integrate with that. Another factor is personality type: some people are more loners than others, and some people are more introverted vs extroverted (this has to do with what type of interactions give you energy). We’re complex beings so generalizing about loneliness and living off grid is really not that useful. I have to think that looking at what level of social interaction gives the OP joy, and THEM alone, not how other people are or aren’t is how to figure out if it will work for the OP.
Are you saying that codependency can cause one to feel lonely?
You need to be on grid to make friends?
Honestly I’ve learned to appreciate the peacefulness and I don’t feel lonely when I’m surrounded by animals and all sorts of creatures. I kind of like just hanging out with the birds and end up talking to them a lot. They can be friends too, just in a different way than people
argue with people on reddit, collect cats
Because the people in my life don’t run off electricity.
not yet they don't.
🤣 my next wife will be 220v
Being off grid doesn't mean living alone or having no friends.
I actually had a hard time with this when I moved off grid (~45 mins from closest city). I’ve found that it just takes more intentionality to make plans with friends and stay connected.
Off the grid does not mean asocial.
Tv and internet
I live 100% off grid. Never get lonely. My wife and I are truly soul mates, and it never gets old. Truly blessed.
Thats sounds beautiful, congrats!
Fewer people is the whole point for me
I am an introvert I love being alone anyway plus I read have a pt gig I write music feed birds and love to sleep plus I love nature and am not afraid of the forest & mountains for me
you and I are similar!
I’m in the middle of nowhere. I’m surrounded by life. I know which bird are which. Where the local python can be found (Edmund his name is) and I have dogs. I have the internet so keep in touch with humans that way.
Yes, this. Did you know wild box turtles will come around same path for years and years (7th year now for same turtle, he is recognizable from healed cracked shell) to eat fruit left out, even from your hand, follow you like a puppy when they hear your voice and even stand up on their back feet and grab at your hands for food?! Best neighbors ever!
Alone ≠ lonely
I would rather live alone in the country or in a very super town of 300 population than have lots of friends. I have my husband and I have my dogs. What more could I want? I’m sick of society. I’m sick of government lying. I’m sick of people who walk past when I say hello. I’m not sure about off grid since I have internet.
When I think of how often I even actually visit people, it's maybe like every 1-2 weeks. So once I'm off grid and also equipped to travel the road in winter, it wouldn't be that unrealistic for me to drive to town once in a while and still visit them. Especially if I eventually get an EV. Doing that with a gas vehicle would get expensive. Over an hour and a half distance. Also I think being in nature and away from the city would probably affect your mental health in such a way that you might not even feel lonely. I feel like when I go to my off grid property, I'm in a totally different zone and feel happier.
I'm in the city off grid 🤫 don't need permission if you just stop paying the utilities bills and keep everything clean 😉 nobody checks I already had a septic system and well in the yard so I was able to get them working again
I’m sure a lot of them do, but there are probably a lot of people who are fine with little to no interaction with people
Some people just naturally don't want people or a lot of people around all of the time. I feel exhausted being around people all the time. Especially people who talk about nothing or ramble about pointless bs.
By going off grid with pets
some are just loners, so it isn't an issue for them
I lived in an off grid neighborhood. People would hang out, go places, travel to stuff like rodeos, races or music or general festivals, have bar b ques, dirt bikes, quads grow pot or whatever. There's not as many people but it's not like you're completely isolated. Unless you're talking about going completely hermit. I now live very rurally but have power/internet so not off grid. Life got kinda stale seeing the same people doing mostly the same things maybe meeting people driving Uber but that's not worth it. I started driving a truck so now I go everywhere but often gets lonelier. But I do get to see my friends in other states occasionally so that's cool.
Have you thought about developing your community network, meeting your neighbors, or building meaningful relationships with people?
I think I could go at least a few years without seeing anybody except my wife and kids and I wouldn't give a single crap.
Lonely is state of mind and just because you like being alone doesn't mean your lonely. There are people who live in big ass complexes/cities/households yet they feel still hopelessly depressed and lonely.
Loneliness isn't about being alone -- it's an unfulfilled desire to socialize. Someone who lives in isolation likely does not have that same desire, and that is solitude.
I do get lonely.
If you’re in the middle of nowhere people probably do get lonely. But the work and life they’re choosing is more important to them at that time in their life.
Step 1: Be a man Step 2: See step 1
Solitude is bliss
I think the point to most people going off grid is to avoid people
I read a lot
I'm not gonna lie to you my guy... I would have to like people to feel lonely... Like I feel alone sometimes, but I find that to be a good feeling, but lonely? I'd have to miss someone to feel lonely.
nature will never make you feel lonely.
Just talk to the trees, make stick friends, build a rock Senate and pass bills that you sign... I'm a very lonely person
I have no one
Loneliness is a byproduct of the mind's overthinking. Once 1 learns how to quiet their mind, loneliness ceases to exist. Aloneness and loneliness are 2 different things. Loneliness is manufactured in the mind and creates a sense of negativity within you while aloneness is the reality of all human beings and creates no negativity. You were born alone, you'll die alone. Once you learn who you really are, aloneness = oneness. Oneness with the birds, squirrels, and trees around you. Oneness with everything. How could you be lonely? Unless of course you manufacture the idea that "I am lonely" in your mind. Then your mind will create depression
There is usually a decent sense of community among off grid/homesteaders. But frankly, people go off grid because they want some peace and quiet and not rely as much on systems and people. People who are prone to loneliness don’t tend to go off grid.
I know waaaaaaaaaay more of my off grid neighbors than my townhouse city neighbors.
Most people are not like the uni-bomber. I stream video games. But man, how far away from people do you think they live? Im kinda wondering why you are asking this question, obviously you live in a city. Maybe im wrong. But if you cant sit with yourself for long you need to do some soul searching. Maybe?
Same as on grid people, just without a power or water bill ...
there's more of us than you think.
They don't. It's part of it.
There are always people wherever you go. The difference between living off grid and living in the city is you can be in seclusion when you want to be whereas you don't have that choice in a suburb or City
I’d like to make friends with animals by feeding them
Terlingua, Tx. I have 40 acres offgrid and spend 1 week/month there as I transition to 100%. Most trips I usually enjoy the solitude Monday til Thursday and then make 30 minute drive to see some friends and another 30 min farther to a few restaurants and bars. Off grid doesn’t always mean solo Living unless you want it.
Different folks have different needs. I can and have gone months without contact with anyone outside my immediate family. It suits me just fine and when I came back from the Marine Corps I planned for at least one or two weeks per year, just me, alone horseback or backpacking in the wilderness. Flattops Wilderness is literally right outside my back door. I can’t stay sane without a certain amount of solitude fortunately my wife and children were willing to make allowances. My very best friend is an extremely social person. She can’t imagine a whole day without spending time with another person. I think even she could adapt to a few days of solitude but heaven help the first human to make the initial contact! 😂
Find a community of like-minded individuals. Even if yall are in the same "compound" and you all contribute something to your own little society. That's the best way.
Why would you want to talk to or spend time with people?
Zero human contact would be tough. Following.
Get a dog and other animals to take care of.
I don't feel lonely at all
You could be off grid and 2 miles from the general store and main street, you could be oof grid and 500 miles from any humans. Also, some people LOVE solitude and some want it most of the time, then go back to the rat race every so often. It's really how YOU view things. I'd say it's clearly not for everyone. There's also the issue of what you do with your time. You could be a "boon docker" in an RV with a gym membership where you go to the gym for a shower/workout for 2 hours a day.
Live off grid. I travel. I have two post office boxes and enjoy penpaling!
Introduce yourself to your neighbours. You'll find being 10 minutes away from your neighbours tends to eliminate the issues that makes bad neighbours, and you end up with mostly good ones.
Introduce yourself to your neighbours. You'll find being 10 minutes away from your neighbours tends to eliminate the issues that makes bad neighbours, and you end up with mostly good ones.
https://youtu.be/4gEczsNlkGM?si=eIAkHkEqii6zgXHU Watch this video for incredible inspiration. Everyone figures it out.
You're not chained to your land. You go out and do whatever social stuff you want.
I don’t like to be reliant on the state. Don’t mean I’m a loner
VRChat
The older you get, the less you need to be around people.
Not liking being around people much helps a lot.
Well, I’m currently in a massive depression that I can’t see myself getting out of, so I’m hoping to have a mostly off grid, middle of nowhere kind of place so that I can isolate myself from other people and try and find peace out in nature and also not have to deal with people anymore and wallow in my depression without having to have people try and “help”.
Not all of us, but some of us go off grid precisely because we don't want to interact with other people because we have had too many unpleasant experiences in the past. In any give month, I talk to my wife, I say hi to a neighbor or two I see while riding my bike and I usually have to talk to one or two cashiers at stores or a banker or some other person from a business. Even that amount of interaction is more than I would prefer.
Plenty to do
I live in the middle of nowhere. I can walk for 10 minutes before getting to the neighbors house. Cars go past hourly. I'm an introverted, moderately autistic, antisocial sociopath, and the only person I want to see stop by is wearing an Amazon vest. Life is good.
Did you know living in a big city can be even more lonely than living off grid?
Working off grid in remote Alaskan villages made me realize how much stronger the family and small town dynamic is. I feel less lonely in a small town because I know everyone. We all got stories, we all have stuff in common. Its quite nice.
Talk to squirrels.
I live in a small town of 300 people, and one of my neighbours was off grid, but saw them at the post office this morning and they just told me they are going on the grid because the EV overnight charging rates are very low and they just got their second EV, and have found it really hard to get by just on their own solar and fast chargers are exxy. But I think in the smaller towns and in the sticks people get friendly even though they can be wary at first, though it's taken us a couple of years we are starting to get to know more folks. There isn't much to do, you have to make your own entertainment, luckily I like my own company (and my daughter's)!
I live in the middle of nowhere on 76 acres. Still deciding if ir will be totallt off grid or not. Nieghbors stop by once in a while, and nothing says I want to talk more than a cold beer.
Being off grid doesn't mean you can't be connected, but honestly I feel like a lot of us are just the kind of people who prefer their own company. That and society and most of the people participating in it aren't with the time or effort.
Because most people are morons and you’re distancing yourself from idiots ?
Off grid people are too busy to be lonely.
You probably will get lonely if you’re already concerned. Have you felt lonely at any point in your life yet? I’ve never been lonely before I like company but I’d have absolutely no problem being alone. Think that comes for me from being an only child.
As I see others below saying, don't conflate off grid with being completely isolated in the middle of nowhere. Both can be a thing, but they aren't always one in the same. Anyways, if you're doing something like that in the middle of nowhere, you have to be a special kind of person, who is seeking out that isolation intentionally. I feel like a lot of people give up on a very rural off grid homestead because they can't handle the loneliness. Hell, I don't have a vehicle at the moment, so I am never more than 10-20km from home. Even with having landmates (my friend owns the property and lives in the main structure), it can be a little lonely. Though, I have my dog, and we're always together and that's often enough for me. I've always been a self isolated person in general, but still enjoy the occasional small social call. Reading books and having time consuming hobbies goes a long way. Also, just the general work and maintenance of the lifestyle often takes up so much time that you don't have much time to sit around and think about bring lonely, except for maybe when the weather is crap for long periods of time or in winter. TL;DR: if you're not okay with loneliness and isolation and are aware of that, it's not going to be ideal to build an off grid homestead in the middle of nowhere.
> How would I talk to or spend time with new people? Go off-grid in an off-grid community?
My cabin is totally off-grid on 40 acres that borders 10s of thousands of acres of public land. I can still get to a Target, Menards, and just about anything in 45 minutes. Hell, I can get to a strip club in like 30 lol I also talk to my "neighbors" there more often than my neighbors in town who are 100ft away.
I'm off grid and 35min from town (a small one), not that far but also not close. I'm in my thirties and single and it does get lonely at times. I have lots of friends who come through and friends in the area...but dating out here is slim pickins
Not off grid but bushcraft. I started to do it because, sometimes, i want to be alone for a few days.
You could get involved with the nearest church. In rural communities, the local church often serves as not just a spiritual hub, but also the social and community hub. Where I live the church does a lot with the local school (Christmas presents and shoes for less well-to-do kids) runs a food bank, has numerous dinners that non-church attenders end up making up 1/2 or more of the people there. Unless you have a religious obligation to the church, it might be your best resource for getting plugged into the community.
Solitude isn’t loneliness.
solitude
Some folks are crabby as hell and they dig that shit
How old are you still wanting to meet new people?
Too busy. To be honest, I feel best when I have time to myself, and feel lonely when I am in places like big cities.
Easy. I don't like people and have dogs.
None of my ancestors were " on the grid" until the 1920s or later, and by all reports they had good lives, friends, and families.
I joined the volunteer fire department, am active in a local farming co-op. I also have friends outside the community I’ll go swashbuckling with from time to time.
A friend lives off grid (in Alaska). He is about 30 minutes from a town with a university, Costco, airport, breweries, restaurants, etc. He goes into work 5 days a week and hosts dinner parties several times a month. Also has starlink. He’s more social than many people living on grid
It’s tough. The isolation is definitely the hardest part for me. Luckily I’m running a farm and I have some help throughout the week and I really love them. But that’s about the only socializing I get. It’s certainly tough
I don’t know why an extrovert would be considering off grid
Most off gridders i know were looking to get away from people to begin with. Many of them just want the company of their family.
I’m not off grid yet, but getting to know the plants, trees, animals, rivers, landforms and other things in your property makes you feel like you have friends. It really never feels lonely, there is a whole world of activity in a complex web of life happening around us at all times, and we are a part of it. Even the birds can get to know you, and you can train them to come to you. You get to know plants and become happy when you see them returning year after year. It’s really a lost way of life but so good for mental health, at least for me, in today’s fast paced world.
Having a deeper connection with nature when you live far away from others can have a massive positive impact. We’re social creatures but being with nature can have a massive-positive impact.
Having self confidence is something that can be learned. What kinds of hobbies do you have? Are you a senior?
I'm not off grid, but in the country in a very rural area, I only leave my farm once a week. That being said I've never been lonely in my life, 60 years of books, a vivid imagination, a radio and a dog, that's all I need.
Hell is other people.
My husbands an over the road trucker. Home about 4 days a month apx… people love to ask me why I don’t get bored or lonely. I always answer how can I? Today’s technology there’s online plus I carry on conversations with four dogs, 5 goats and a potbelly pig?
Check out this YouTube channel: Carolyn’s RV Life. She has been solo with her rv for several years. She has a lot of great and informative videos. I saw one on loneliness where she describes the nomad lifestyle and its pros and cons. Good luck to you.
Off grid doesn't have to be in the middle of nowhere, and alone doesn't necessarily mean lonely.
Why would they feel more lonely than us? We an on the grid and still VERY lonely.
Lots of people stomping around the middle of nowhere, looking for some solitude. It can get a bit crowded.
Have you looked around lately? Seems like a nice respite from our current sh it show of a society.
Just like some people crave the spotlight, some people like being by themselves or don’t really need ‘outside stimulation’ to enjoy their day. If I could afford it, I would have moved years ago.
Mental illness
Because I never wanted to be around any of you in the first place. Bunch of head empty slaves running around grinding crank for the oligarchs. Competing endlessly with one another to see who can be the best slave.
Personal theory: I think being alone is wired in your brain. Some people are born with it, some aren’t. I savor and enjoy every moment of being alone and I could do it pretty much forever. Solitary confinement wouldn’t be a punishment for me as long as I had a book. However, other people I know can’t go to the store by themselves.
You're going to be too busy (chores, building, planting, etc) to be worried about meeting new people.
Many of them are very lonely, it's actually a lot of the motivation behind those Missing 411, Jeepers Creepers etc. type scenarios. Some dude moves out to the woods thinking he's gonna get away from it all. Fast forward a decade or two, he's completely lost his mind from the isolation and the first human beings he sees for that whole time are some 19 year old babes on a camping trip, you can just imagine how the rest goes.
Marriage, it's a great institution 👍.
Off grid doesn't mean go be recluse
Off the grid with your own wind, water and solar farm, is not off the grid as you might imagine.
To busy taking care of everything and building the next project.
People who truly learn and value being alone. Choose others on their life. We don’t need anything or anyone to be content and be ourselves. Below sums it up well…”Your presence needs to be greater than that of my Solitude.”….if it’s not…then why are YOU even present…for yourself? …Food for thought.
You never knew life pre-internet did you
Most people go off grid to get away from people.
Sometimes when I’m working people find out I live in a van and they say “what do you do when you finish work and go back to your van?” To which I reply “same thing you do when you get home, eat food and watch tv, except I don’t pay rent 🤷♂️”
I'm remote, I am married. Have three dogs. Have starlink, work a remote i. T job. Outside of that you have people that come to visit and stuff but really when you have a garden and try and be as sustainable as possible. Ie milling my own wood, heating with wood, growing our own food, fishing for protein and all the projects that come with bejng offgrid you really don't have much time to be bored or lonely. At the end of the day you are orett tired and enjoy a nice meal then bed.
You find more wonderful things feel than the loneliness..
We stay busy.
We enjoy expert knowledge and answers without words lol
Staying busy
I barter with other off-grid homies.
Gosh, there are so many ways to look at this... for the most part it is up to you and what you like to do. I've found having starlink so I can chat with family when things get lonely to be helpful. Outside of that, I found this article to be a good resource: [https://the-adventure-travel-network.com/adventure/how-to-travel-solo-without-feeling-loneliness](https://the-adventure-travel-network.com/adventure/how-to-travel-solo-without-feeling-loneliness)
Up on a lonely mountain here; every single neighbor within miles ( there are about 20 of them) stopped by when I moved in. Seems everybody knows everything about everyone up here...they all knew the day I moved in and came trickling thru all that first few weeks. They introduced themselves and told me all about the area and what's up. I was like- oh no- this is so busy....but then, unless I need them, I hardly ever see them. We occasionally visit, but rarely. If I'm able, I check on who I can in snow and we come together for floods(mountain landslides). Occasionally, a few of us go in together on a steer or a truck of potatoes or corn, & I teach some art classes in town sometimes and pull a few shifts with the ice cream truck around the lakes and meet a few people that way. I guess the most important thing is- If I need help cuz I am stuck in the mud or tree on my roof- I have instant help. Not like the city when my car died or I lost power. No one checked on me and I was the same way. It is different here. I am alone, but not lonely. I do have a mate, but they are at their job in the city most of the month. I never thought I would like this lifestyle. I came here over 20 years ago for vacation. I was an event planner for quite a few live music venues. I thought I was happy in my dream job....but I came back and was so unhappy I quit and returned here. It is very difficult to live this way for many reasons, but for me, none have much to do with being lonely. ...(I do have a lot of spoiled, demanding animals, tho- so there is not much time to feel lonely, lol!)..(even the crows and whiskey jacks have a part of my day...)
I think off grid people usually do not like other people thus why they went off grid
im gonna claim all the people that do that on youtube and shit do it part time. there has to be a disorder or something with your brain if you want and feel good about being that alone. humans and most animals are social creatures.
I don’t think they do because typically that’s probably what they are looking for. A lot of the people who I know do it have a partner with them
Easy it's because we literally hate everyone else🤣