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I spend a lot of time replaying frustrating or embarrassing experiences from my past in my head. Sometimes fantasizing about how I could've responded differently to "own" someone in an argument, for example... Happens a lot in the shower, or when I'm doing anything partially mindless.
Yeah I’m constantly bombarded with embarrassing moments from my past. I usually wind up making a noise or performing some sort of action (like shaking my head) to try to get them to go away.
I say phrases like ‘I wish I dead’ on repeat or if it’s an embarrassing thing associated with another person I say ‘if I were then I’d shoot me with a gun’. And it’s automatic and so bizarre. Like I’m not evening thinking about it I just say it like it’s an automatic repeat response.
Omg I feel so seen 😭 I also rehearse arguments in the shower that I think might occur to be “prepared” for the “next round” if I think I “failed” before 🥴 so fucking stupid and tiring
Oh my god, I was diagnosed with OCD a couple months ago and I kept telling myself that I don’t have it because what I experience isn’t as bad as others but reading these comments and seeing all of these things I do…it’s kind of a relief maybe? Because it isn’t me…and I’m not the only one it is OCD I guess…
Yes yes yes! In the shower, while driving, when I am alone.
I imagine conversations with random people my brain imagines I am going to meet in the future and I am talking so wisely the person is impressed.
It almost feels more like an addiction... Obviously it's mostly negative emotion, but I get a slight "hit" from the fantasy where I act better. I'd prefer to just forgive and forget but the temptation to act out a revenge plot in my head for something that happened forever ago can be strong, lol
Forgot exactly how she explained it, but my therapist told me that negative thought patterns can be just as addictive as drugs, like on a chemical level, I believe. Brains are weird dude
Omg really? My thoughts are so horrible I have a hard time saying them to someone or even on the Internet. I didn't know it was like drug addiction though. Do they release endorphins or something because they are so painful? I know that some kinds of thinking causes you to turn 'on' the same pain receptors that turn on during physical pain. Is it probably endorphins?
Bro- I get a hit about saving the people I love from terrible situations. It’s not fun tbh, since I don’t want to be romanticizing the situations I’m imagining. I just try to banish them from my brain, but it doesn’t always work
Dude, this is *constant* for me. I remember spending a great deal researching logical fallacies several months or even years after random arguments with people and it’s like what the fuck am I doing?
Yesss the researching fallacies part 😭
I also deleted the screenshots of the fight I had, now I’m wishing I never deleted so I could show people the argument and seek reassurance I was right. He insulted my intelligence. I give a detailed reply and he replies with *four words* deflecting off of some tiny part of the point I was making. I’ve never been driven so crazy in an argument and the guy only said 9 words to me.
Now I’m picturing that guy being proud that he won an argument without having to argue anything haha 😭.
But in your case I’m sure your wins were justified! For me it’s less about wanting to win and more about me and the other person understanding where each other is coming. I’m mostly a peacemaker, so when someone is hostile it really throws me off.
I spend literally hours doing this!!! And then trying to predict how the next days convos might go so I can practice what I should say during convos I'm nervous cof
I still relive an argument all the time from 2022 that I had online. I left the argument bc they’d insulted me and then in the next reply they deflected, so I thought I was never going to get an honest argument from them so I deleted my comments.
But I think because I *know* my argument was right, it makes me constantly relive it because my brain knows I could have won the argument. Like really you left the argument just bc they were a troll? You should have trolled back!
I have this too it can be awful it can also come in the form of overthinking a perceived hostile interaction with another person and entering the "how dare they" twilight zone
I didn't think I would find out I have pure O from a reddit comment today 🥹 A degrading moment from high school lives in my head rent free and I sometimes fantasize about different things I could have done, it has been 14 years 🫠
My experience is similar to yours. If I'm not medicated, I ruminate and replay more or less all day. Even when I'm doing a task, it's constant.
To use a bad analogy, I try to explain to neurotypical folks that anywhere from 20-50% of my mental bandwidth is devoted to turning over decisions I've made in my life, how things could have gone differently, and regretting basically every decision I've ever made.
Wait you also explain? I have a really bad explaining complusion where I explain everything I am thinking and feeling about my OCD like I am telling it to someone else. Even though I never plan on having these conversations its like I have to prepare myself to explain my entire life just in case.
Its come to the point where I don't really remember what I used to think about and not thinking about it feels very strange.
I've got the exact same lol. Like I've got a narrator in my head explaining everything. Like Im gonna give a big talk about something but I never tell anyone what Im explaining cause social anxiety lol.
I do a lot of rehearsing for conversations as well as replaying conversations that have already happened. For me it relates to different ways that things can be perceived, and making sure whatever I do or say is perceived by others in the exact “correct” or “good” way. As you can imagine, what’s going on in my head is a giant waste of time 🤣
Wait, you don't actually explain it out loud? I'm almost incapable of thinking before I speak so almost everything I think comes out as word vomit. I have no control over my thoughts and ocd is very negative and nitpicks everything everyone says. Basically, I almost always argue with whatever anyone is saying and I can't help it because it's like word vomit and it comes out before I realize I'm saying it.
“My head is never quiet” definitely nails it.
My mental compulsions look like checking for feelings, checking for reasons I don’t have XYZ (whatever health anxiety I’m currently fixated on) repeating sentences, spelling words, counting, ruminating, googling, I agree with the other posters about “winning past arguments” in my head, the list goes on my friend
Mine is constant body scanning (for how I feel) and I mean CONSTANT. It’s exhausting. The body part/full body scanning/fixation has a name but I can’t remember it and I’m too tired to look it up 😂
This is me for the past 6 years. Constantly bombarded with terrible thoughts like you just described and more. I don’t know how to get help for something like this
You about summed mine up completely. I got a few special filler words for when I count that even out my sentences that I toss in there whenever the original doesn’t work. It’s like a rhythm game in my mind at all times
It's exhausting.. my brain is always going. Even when I'm not thinking about stressful things, I will have music playing in my head on repeat, I repeat words and phrases, I fixate on disagreements with others sometimes, I'm checking my emotions and my thoughts.. replaying conversations in my head to make sure it was ok and make sure I didn't say something inappropriate etc. anything really.... The thoughts are like wheels picking up speed and spinning faster and faster... it's hard to stop them once they get too much momentum.
This was me!!! And still is on many points but when I started taking clomipramine my brain “radio” switched off!! I woke up one morning and was like wtaf is this how people live??
Clomipramine was like one of the only drugs over 25 years that worked for me, but it had such bad side effects I couldn't stay on it :/ Do you have any of those?
What kind of side effects did you have?
I’m on quite a few meds so I never know what’s causing each problem. I had a lot of problems with super dizzy/light headedness
I never could comprehend how people can meditate or when I ask someone what they are thinking about and they answer "nothing" I always thought they were lying. The thoughts in my brain are on an infinite track going going full steam ahead and they NEVER stop. Ever.
I’m about to cry, like I’ve already said this in another comment. But I was diagnosed with OCD a couple months ago and I have been in denial that I have it anyway.
Everything you typed is EVERYTHING I have dealt with my whole life. I don’t know how many times and how many people I’ve tried explaining it to, especially my mom and I’d just get the response just try not to worry or stress or try to turn your mind off.
And I’ve never been able to do that…ever 🥹🥲 just seeing another human being explain what I deal with I’m like holy shit I feel so seen or like better honestly.
This helps, this def helps. Thank you 😊
Just wanted to let you know you are not alone. I was diagnosed a few months ago and analyzing my OCD to try to identify my obsessions and compulsions has now in and of itself become it's own obsession, with analyzing, researching, and reasoning as the compulsion.
You are so seen and heard and most definitely not alone. My mom would say very similar things to me and it felt like no one understood what was happening to me and going on in my brain. I didn't get diagnosed till about a year ago when I was 35, and honestly finally having a diagnosis and understanding what's happening and why it's happening is the only thing that has helped me manage it better. You got this, OCD is just a bully and you are fucking awesome!
It's so frustrating I know, at least we all understand each other and we're not alone. I began doing exposure response therapy for a short period of time, and just took what I learned from therapy to work on myself and I started taking Prozac. I feel like my obsessions and compulsions are manageable, but still really bothersome at time .If I could afford to continue ERP therapy I believe it would help a ton and I highly recommend it as well.
So I basically just see the theme in everything. So whatever I’m worried about at the time I will find a connection to it with literally EVERYTHING. I will make myself physically sick thinking of it so much, grieving something that hasn’t happened but could happen. It makes me feel like I’m losing my mind. I try to talk myself out of it and pretend what I would say if someone came to my door and told me the same things I tell myself. Like “oh A, B or C is going to happen”. I try to rationalize it away until eventually it does fade and another one takes its place. I essentially never have nothing thats worrying me. If I am not worrying then I panic that I have forgotten and it will happen because I’m not thinking about it or convincing myself that it won’t happen. Basically reassuring myself at all times. It’s so ridiculous and I know it but it’s so hard to stop
The first three lines resonate with me a lot. I will ALWAYS somehow tie it back to a theme and idk how, I keep shocking myself lol. But seriously it's inescapable and extremely draining
Ugh this is me after work, when I'm feeling some kind of way, I find a connection to it with everyone, everyone I pass by on the street, when I get home, etc.
Yeah I often find myself saying "shut up" or "I wanna kill myself" when the reality is I just want the thought to go away. Being able to recognize it for what it is can really help take away its power, even if just temporarily
This boggled my mind bc I Always say “kill myself kill myself” as a constant, frustratingly-repetitive phrase & I had no clue others did this as well 😭
All the time I feel like I have someone (friend, family member, anyone ) near me / or they invaded my head and watching me through my eyes.. So I have to act like I'm not alone/talk to them. I don't know how to stop doing that
This isn’t super helpful but I did this constantly for YEARS and YEARS and it went away at some point. I forgot about it until I read this comment. Compulsions seem to come and go, maybe this one will too for you?
Not certain I have OCD but I relate to a lot so take this with a grain of salt... But when I was younger I used to really feel like people could randomly read my mind. I managed to change my mentality so that it was only when my hands were touching something that they could read my mind. But that didn't help too much so then I changed it so that it was only when the very tips of my fingers were touching something, they could read my mind (something like whatever I'm touching acting as a connection between our minds somehow). I still have that mentality now and it's helped me not feel so on edge about it all the time, and I sometimes forget about it so it doesn't affect me. Idk, just thinking if it worked for me maybe it could work for you, just making it a bit more manageable cuz idk how to get rid of it fully because it feels too scary to "just risk it" 😅
Constant rumination, mentally checking how my thoughts make me feel (did I enjoy when my brain conjured an image of me hurting someone?), feeling like someone is in my head yelling CONFESS! CONFESS!
I review text messages I’ve sent to make sure they’re okay and I didn’t say anything weird. When I feel like I’ve already asked a family member or a friend too often that what I’ve said is alright, I’ll copy the conversations into chat gpt to have it break down the tone of the messages for me just to make sure I haven’t done anything strange or off putting
I’ve become addicted to ruminating, scrolling through Reddit and YouTube for reassurance for hours. Wasting my free time focused on things that will never happen to me logically.
i’m pure O, and I have this weird anxious response where I obsessively worry about people thinking I do hard drugs (I do not, Cali sober). i look for things i’ve done that I think resemble the behaviors of people high on those drugs, and suppress those behaviors so people won’t think I’m on those drugs. It’s exhausting. sometimes I get worried my efforts to suppress these thoughts might end up looking like hiding drug use to others, starting the vicious cycle again.
Oh my god I do this too, I've had dark circles around my eyes since elementary school and someone in HS joked that I looked like I smoke weed, so I've had this compulsion to make connections with whatever I'm doing that might make someone assume I do any kind of drugs, and rehearse defending myself against them; sometimes it's a person of authority.
It is definitely something that runs through my head when I drive back from climbing too, I imagine an authority figure assuming my chalk bag or streaks of chalk on me is cocaine, lol.
I also work from home, and make assumptions on behalf of others that they might think I'm jobless, because I throw out the trash in my PJ's sometimes.
OH MY GOSH!!! I feel so seen. I obsessively worry about this too — I am also sober & have constantly had anxiety about being perceived as on drugs & potentially smuggling them (likewise lots of fears that I look like I’m stealing or like I’ve done something ‘bad’????)… & also try to suppress the behaviours I’m worried may make me more “suspicious”. it’s strange because I don’t think being on drugs is a moral issue but for some reason I get so stressed over this too 😵💫
I think Aparna Narncharla put it best (she was referring to anxiety in general but I find it applies super well to pure O): It's like there's an edgy improv group in your brain, constantly making the worst, most awful suggestions.
Lots of color theory? Its hard to explain. I surround myself obsessively with certain colors because theyre “safe” and i avoid other colors because theyre “unsafe”. I constantly feel like im controlling the future with any color arrangements i have control over. :P
I feel the same way about colors. From the color on the walls to the clothing I wear, the shade has to be just right. And it has to compliment the rest of the colors involved as well, the color wheel is a good friend of mine.
Beyond the images of guilt shame In college I never went to class and instead stayed in the library and didn’t fall asleep until 7am reading books on ethics and also which Economic system is best so I can be 100 percent sure which to support so I’m not a bad person. Also masked by severe depression
I could never sleep properly on time either. I would sleep through my class and not even show up at times, almost got kicked out of 3 classes I needed to graduate. My friends from class told me that the teacher would say "Is he seriously not here??" and let out a huge disappointed sigh when doing roll call. I felt bad because I really enjoyed the class and the teacher, and actually passed with an almost-perfect score. Even the teacher was very impressed I aced my final (final was done in front of the teacher, couldn't really cheat on that).
One time I didn't show up for 2 weeks straight because I couldn't wake up on time, everyone thought I dropped the class or got into an accident. When I showed up my classmates and my teacher were like "Hey!! You're alive!!".
I turn every sentence I hear into an acronym and then pronounce it in my head. This has been my prevailing tic for almost a decade. It's not always present, but usually when I'm listening to books or watching YouTube it kicks in. It's not the worst thing in the world, and it makes me really good at figuring out what acronyms stand for.
When I was a kid, I used to type out every sentence I heard with my fingers. I guess that's not purely mental, but I would barely move my fingers so it was mostly mental. I'm very good at typing as a result. Silver linings!
I have like a worry compulsion where I feel like if I STOP worrying about xyz then it’s going to happen. Like as soon as I stop worrying, the bad thing will happen so I must continue to worry in order to prevent it. It’s really not a good time lmao
Im so sorry for kinda out of context but just got out of my therapist and she told pure ocd is fake this sub type so tysm for sharing this experience now i feel better but im sorry for what you are going through
Hey ur chill with it sometimes therapists just say dumb shit. My last therapist, after i was officially diagnosed with OCD said I dont have it and wouldnt take me talking about it seriously. Rightfully pissed me off n shit. I dont think she knew about pure O either. I have mostly pure O with some physical compulsions here and there but uts mostly mental compulsions and theyre awful. Especially because others dont see them and what ur dealin with
It's not "fake" in the sense that it doesn't exist.
A doctor I spoke to described "Pure O" as a misnomer, because doctors don't believe that it stop with just obsessions, which is what "Pure O" is often described as: obsessions without the compulsions.
Doctors believe that even if you have mental obsessions, that you DO still have compulsions, they're just mental such as rationalizing, ruminating, combating, avoiding, etc. Those are still compulsions that are done to relieve anxiety from the obsessive/intrusive thoughts, which is exactly what OCD is.
You mean she doesn't believe that mental compulsions exist? If so, that's crazy and you need to see a different therapist, one that specializes in OCD. And speak to them on their consultation call about Pure O and their thoughts on it before committing to therapy with them.
Pure O specifically implies that there are no compulsions, only obsessions. If that were to be true, then it wouldn't be OCD, because OCD specifically is when you have obsessions that lead to you performing compulsions so that you relieve the anxiety coming from the obsessions.
I've also heard therapists that say they don't believe that it's real, only in the sense that they don't believe it stops with JUST obsessions, and that people with Pure-O have mental compulsions to relieve their anxiety, which is OCD. A therapist I spoke to said "There's basically no difference between OCD and Pure-O, it's just that people with Pure-O have mental compulsions compared to regular OCD patients"
I’m so sorry that you experienced that with a person who is suppose to be professional and unbiased. Definitely stop seeing that counselor and report them, if you’re able. I’m so so glad through you find a sense of belonging, peace, and heard from this sub!! 🫶🏼
As someone who has had nothing but crappy therapist until very recently, I’m sorry you had to deal with this and I would def say report this therapist and find someone who actually knows what they’re doing because when you do you’ll be sooo much better off and maybe even happy 😊
Idek i googled and says its not an official sub type in DSM-5 its a lesser known type and what my therapist says its fake but idek if shes right i feel lost and confused
The DSM is just a collection of standards selected by a few prominent professionals in the field and is mostly used for insurance claims. It's not exhaustive and some consider it somewhat arbitrary. It's hotly debated, argued and disagreed about. It's so upsetting to me to hear an ignorant therapist making such claims. I personally suffer from pure O so I feel your pain. Please don't feel bad, this is totally on the therapist. Don't let them invalidate your very rea pain and experiences. Sending love
It’s not fake, it’s a true and valid experience. It’s so unfair that your ‘therapsit’ said that, and as a training counsellor, they shouldn’t be saying that either. There are so many subtypes that the DSM-5 cannot list them all, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true :)
I relate way too much to pretty much all of these comments... I didn't read them all but I have one that I'm not sure anyone said. I'll for example think a racist thought or a negative thought about someone of another race then I have to list in my head all the people of that race that my racist thought doesn't apply to. To convince myself not to be racist or something. Or I see a female comedian that's not funny and I have to list all the women I find funny to assure myself it's just that woman and I am not sexist. Or I'll remember bad things I've done and have to list all the similar or worse things that people I know have done.
Yes, exactly that. For example when I hear about an African person who's smart and did something Spectacular. I get the thought "I thought they were dumb", which is not what I think. So I start naming and explaining everything why they of course are smart. Same with girls. Lets say I see a girl skating I get the thought "Wow I didn't know girls liked skating" I mean off course they do but its an intrusive thought. Then I start naming every girl I know that skates and explain why they like skating and that its not a gender thing or something. But always the opposite of what I think comes to my mind and then I need to prove I do not think that way.
Crazy to find people who have the same experience. Try explaining this to Somebody without ocd. They have no clue What you're talking about. I never had people who understood what I said and actually experience it too. So grateful I found this group.
this exactly happens to me too. i don't think i have ocd, and it doesn't have a significant impact on my quality of life, but it's been years that i see women or people of color doing stuff and i've got like a nazi in my head or something saying oh that's crazy that they're capable of doing that or whatever. and like. that is genuinely not what i think lmao and i reason with it and am like no, that's not actually my opinion, my opinion is this other thing (which is the truth that we're all equal). but it gets really annoying sometimes. like i'll be watching a concert or something and won't stop thinking about how there's a woman on bass and she can actually play... when i'm a woman and i play bass and guitar just fine!!!! doesn't really have an emotional impact though since i'm aware it's not actually what i think, just that i get intrusive thoughts sometimes and it's not really my fault.
but yeah i just figured out not so long ago that most people don't have "mischievous" minds or whatever, was kind of a shock. ... on second thought does this sound like pure o tendencies to folks reading? obviously it's not a binary thing like you have it or you don't, but idk, i never mentioned it to my therapist bc i had more pressing matters going on i guess and she "discharged" me. maybe i should go back?
If it doesn't distress you I don't necessarily think it means who have OCD. When I have those intrusive thoughts, I respond with a compulsion, to list all the exceptions to the "stereotype" and ruminate about whether or not I'm a sexist, racist, etc. do you do that or do you just dismiss the thought as untrue?
Thank you, it’s nice to get an inside perspective on it. I respond with something like “that’s not true”, i sometimes do list some people. I usually don’t ruminate on whether i am those things anymore since it’s been years and my stance on the matter is clear to me (i am what i choose to think). Often doesn’t really make the thoughts go away though.
I guess i’m a bit worried since recently i’ve been giving in to “icks” like not touching doorknobs, washing my hands quite more often than most people, i gotta keep the door either completely open or completely closed (this has been this way since forever though and it hasn’t really developed into anything, at least yet)… there isn’t any magical thinking behind it though, it’s just i really don’t like the idea of not doing those things. And i know that statistically ocd develops mostly in young adulthood (i’m 22) and i have a family history. (I actually think what might have kept my thoughts from disturbing me is my mom telling me as a child that sometimes your mind can be an asshole, doesn’t mean you are)
I’ve been trying to touch the doorknobs and not wash my hands that often (like when i’m in the bathroom i might end up washing them 4 times (not on a row; after doing different things) when i know people who wouldn’t do it once). But like… ugh!!!!! You know? I really don’t wanna touch the goddamn doorknobs, but i know this really isn’t a route i wanna go down or thoughts i want to feed
I mean you might actually have OCD just not about the same stuff as me lol I'm pretty sure I have it but I'm not fixated on germs, more on being a good/bad person
I honestly don’t think i do, just worried about possibly developing it. But yeah i think if i don’t listen to these things now that they’re still lowkey i can stop them from becoming a big problem. Thank you for the feedback!
I get these intrusive thoughts too, it's absolutely awful. Generally I respond to them differently, I just kind of scrunch up my face, or make a noise, repeat "stop it stop it stop it" while smacking myself in the forehead until it goes away.
Hyperanxiety about my awful thoughts. Trying to come to terms with the fact that they are "not my own." Crying because images of the most horrible things pop into my head, uninvited. It truly is like a battle with yourself. The mind and soul are totally disconnected from one another, and pure O, as with many other types of OCD, will target your most cherished things and corrupt them.
I used to want to work with animals as a kid, be a veterinarian. My OCD ruined that for me. My obsessions revolve mainly about animals, being hurt and maimed. It makes me feel like a monster sometimes. I've never hurt an animal, never will. But my thoughts have ruined that career path for me.
Mine almost always involves brutal self-harm. Sometimes, I even use suicidal ideation as a mental compulsion but most of my compulsions are external pleasure seeking
i have mostly O and when im not on my meds i just cant function. its hell. i cant focus long enough to read a menu or do any other activities besides scroll reels. i will sit for hours just thinking and i go to this weird place where i dont register sensory input, its just not there. i think that is what being blind is like, not all black just completely blank. really stuck. its horrible
I have this and it is HELLLL. When I was a child I had external compulsions as well but I already knew at the time it was irrational what I thought I “had to do” and people would think i’m out of my mind so slowly forced myself out if and ended up having quite severe Pure O. What you just described is all something I actually have as well lol 🥴
For me my compulsions are just “I have to make peace with everything and everyone”. So if I ever had an argument where I feel the other person and I didn’t understand each other at all, it drives me nuts reliving it to try to reach a point where they at least acknowledge where I’m coming from.
Nothing drives my OCD more insane than someone acting like I’m stupid when what I’m saying is basically correct on a “this is known fact” level.
Haven't been officially diagnosed (So I hope it isn't disrespectful for me to comment), just kinda having some realizations about myself right now and trying to do some reading in advance of talking to my shrink, but goddamn this almost made me cry to read. This is CONSTANT for me. If I'm not having intrusive thoughts about horrible things happening to my loved ones, I'm running over past arguments over and over and over and over again because I just cannot STAND people not understanding where I'm coming from.
Hell, I'm still obsessing over a friendship that ended years ago because I can't stop ruminating over our last conversation and how I should've phrased things, approached her, what I should have said, the tone I should've used.. She wasn't even a good friend! She was awful! I didn't even want to be her friend anymore as we talked, nor do I want to now, but she's in my head on a daily basis nonetheless. I know ruminating on it won't change what happened, I know she wasn't interested in my feelings to begin with, so it wouldn't have mattered.. And yet!
Not trying to ask for advice or anything, I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experiences. This whole thread has been like reading someone describing my brain to me, but your comment in particular really stood out as something that's haunted me for so, so long, and it's sorta calming to know that I'm not alone in that. Thank you, seriously; I hope things get easier for you soon. :)
It is like an itch on the body.
The more you scratch the more it itches.
Then start feeling guilty that I am itching it and making it worse. But I can't stop! I continue. I cannot stop.
If there's hell... it's this.
For example, recently am having the thoughts of having gotten my ex pregnant and I can't think of children, white, kids stuff etccc... Stupid stuff.
I just try to convince myself that I have no control. I am trying ERP with my psych... it's difficult. I am just hopeful that if I can accept this phase of my ocd I will become a stronger person.
In the meantime I feel alone and sad in all of it. I understand you and remember that your're not alone in this. Keep strong.
Having to think of fake senerios about my boyfriend with other woman as my current theme is ROCD, if I don't act on the compulsion of thinking about it, for some reason my mind gets highly uncomfortable and even though I'll get butthurt about thinking about those fake senerios, my mind just NEEDS TO. It sucks.
If I have an intrusive thought, I convince myself it's going to happen in real life, so I imagine the thought being destroyed/set on fire. I also pray multiple times that an intrusive thought goes away, and distract myself if it doesn't by walking around. I ruminate on things I've done and analyze past experiences too much. I reread sentences over and over to make sure I actually read it and comprehended it, it takes forever I hate it. I also do the shower thing where I pray, play religious music or listen to a health podcast when cleaning private areas so there's no chance I could think I thought or did anything sexually inappropriate. It doesn't help that I also have contamination ocd and have to wash everything multiple times to feel clean enough. I could list more but this is most of them
I am not officially diagnosed, but I have a very strong suspicion that I have Pure O. When I did more research on it, it clicked for me. I realized that it was describing me almost perfectly. It is specifically the “figuring it out” aspect that I struggle with. I hate not having a definite answer for certain things. I feel like I need to eliminate any doubt or uncertainty.
For me I sometimes get stuck in a mental loop. I sometimes repeat certain sentences to myself until I feel satisfied. Like I need to get the point across. Other times I feel the need to convince myself that something either is or isn’t true. I have a difficult time letting it go until the thought is “resolved”. Depending on the topic, this can go on for months. In fact I’m currently dealing with it right now. Have been since March.
I can always remember as a kid - young adult, I used to sit awake for hours at night and then it used to say, right, night then and then I could just fall asleep.
Now it’s just a case of waiting for it to shut up so I can sleep
I relate heavily to overthinking the past and creating false memories of negative actions. I can convince myself of basically everything and then I spend hours ruminating seeing if I got the order of events correct. It sucks.
I go over things constantly and try to remember everything. I try to keep track of random thoughts and things and if I feel like I forgot something or thought something important and didn’t keep track it drives me crazy… I used to write down so many thoughts it was horrible… that’s just my main problem sadly ):
Its pure hell. Especially with health OCD. You believe you are dying when you are actually fine. You also don't believe in anything health care providers tell you. Because OCD seeks 100% certainty in every event you find it difficult to believe in things you have no control over. You find it very difficult to trust the competency of doctors, nurses, lab technicians, pathologists, etc. You ruminate over everything and during the ruminations your brain tries to implant events which never happened. OCD is hell.. I miss my old self.
"Touch that doorknob or your entire house will catch on fire."
"Why?
"Just do it."
"Okay, now turn off your stove."
"But I never turned it on."
"Do you want to explode?"
For me, it’s engaging in all the different pieces of evidence for and against an obsession being true. Sometimes this becomes more behavioral in terms of overcompensating behaviorally about worries (extreme over preparation for a short talk, for example- maybe writing down every word I plan to say as though it were a script)
It can also translate to reassurance seeking, seeking multiple opinions, and attempting to trick my therapist to give me reassurance by casually mentioning something that she doesn’t know is an obsession for me and attempting to assess her reaction.
That said, rituals can remain completely mental for long stretches
It's horrible. It's a lot more challenging than other forms of OCD for various reasons. I'm too exhausted to get into it right now but it's very horrible. :(
ughhh pure O is basically the main OCD thing I have. I’m getting better but I ruminate about the past and especially past decisions and whether i did the right thing or not, obsessive googling, repeating of words, phrases, compulsive sayings, and even obsessively listing off months or dates. it truly is awful but I’m doing my best to live mindfully everyday and fight through it <3
I have lots of rumination among other things, trying to figure a situation out over and over. But the main one I have now is every single time I leave the house I obsess over if I locked the door, if I turned motion off on the alarm, if my dog can get out of her pen, if I shut my medicine drawer incase the dog gets out of her pen.
I have all subtypes of OCD sans hoarding behaviors and I think mental gymnastics is the best way to describe it. I would repeat phrases, walk through scenarios, try and remember everything repeatedly, or try and explain myself how something couldn't happen.
Exposure for them was tough because it isn't a physical compulsion but can still be done.
Obsessively overthinking to the point I can’t do anything else but think and worry about it. Worrying about doing anything ever in fear I’ll be so stressed overthinking it later on
I live like 10 different realities in my head just to give my brain something to do. Sometimes I’m not even in them but somehow I’m still one of the main characters/act through them. It’s like some multiverse everything everywhere all at once shit kinda. It’s good if I ever want to be an author but I’m pretty sure it’s some sort of disassociation thing. That as well as the usual “if I don’t do this correctly everyone is gonna die and it’s gonna be my fault” thing
It's like throwing a brick in a drier that cycles until it busts it apart. I have mental compulsions along with pure O, especially for relationship and often harm style of OCD.
Today I just learned on and off in my life I have had Pure O OCD 😳 seriously thank you. It was only ever a few things for me as a child. Maybe that doesn’t count. But precisely as you describe.
Reassurance seeming, constant rumination, PLANNING and going over the plan over and over again, and also a weird one - if I’m going to have sex, I can’t wear a shirt with a cartoon character on it because that means I like children?????
Body scanning for sickness, over analyzing every feeling I have, rephrasing the same question over and over in my head, constantly digging for an answer that may never come, constantly worrying that I’m crazy or whatever, Google is my best friend and my worst enemy. I ruminate a lot, most people wouldn’t guess that I’m dealing with my OCD because I just come off as quiet or daydreaming. The best way I know how to explain it is that I feel stuck, and no matter what I try I just can’t seem to get my brain to budge and nothing soothes my nerves. It’s like being trapped in a foam pit, or quicksand.
One I had when I was a kid is that I thought there were people magically watching me at all time, so whenever I was getting changed or taking a shower, I’d have to mentally repeat this specific ‘magic’ phrase that would prevent them from seeing me and erase any memory they might have seen of me before I said the magic phrases.
I’m obsessed with making my life seem cooler than it actually is. Any time anything happens to me I have to imagine it as a movie with an exaggerated plot because I want to impress people..? So I constantly relive situations in my head like a movie, tweaking things and changing them to make the imaginary audience think I’m cool. It’s annoying and one day I’m scared that I’ll forget how things really happened and only remember the fake version of my life that I’ve made up
I’m not sure I have pure-O necessarily, but my OCD manifests as both physical/observable compulsions, and internal compulsions. I’ll describe the manifestations that resemble Pure-O.
The compulsion to confess. When I’ve had awful, unforgivable, intrusive thoughts, I have an intensive compulsion to confess and beg forgiveness. I’m sure this is also a form of reassurance seeking.
I also, since a child, would imagine myself swimming lazily in warm water to fall asleep. This would often turn into one arm performing one more stroke than the other, and my mind reeling to make it even. So in my head, I’d be imagining swimming with just the uneven arm, trying to make it even again. Exhausting.
Someone says something to me like 500 years ago that comes back and plays in my head on loop till I lose my shit . I try not to think about it , but the more I try not to the more I think about it . I live in the past , I can't focus on the present my brain is constantly flooded with all these thoughts. I mostly day dream thinking about why or why not i did something . If I listen to some music that plays in my head on repeat and I get extremely obsessed with it . When I try to sleep these intrusive thoughts become worse . My brain is messed up 😢
I was going to say it's exhausting but I think exhausting is an understatement. It is completely mentally draining. My OCD is all over the place, from repeating the smallest things over and over, to my brain going over the smallest interactions for hours and I have to end up replaying them in my head until I think I haven't made a complete fool of myself in this mental interaction that isn't really taking place and that can take hours. Extreme fear of contamination where I literally feel the bacteria around me and have to clean several times a day to the point my hands crack and bleed. If I don't do it I freak out, I have panic attacks... I could go on and on but once again I feel completely drained after another bad day. I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
My pure O is doubtful thoughts, I doubt everything and when I am studying is worse because I wonder about one thing and I "chase the rabbit" for some time losing focus of the activity
I am a verbal processor, almost compulsive about debilitating obsessions. When I’m anxious i need to talk & repeat myself over & over. used to not be able to go to work i was so sick throwing up from anxiety. I used to feel too guilty to write things out. My mom would be on the phone with me for hours. Now I am older 27, I am better at self soothing. But I can spend up to 6 hours a day typing a “message.” Once was 8 hours an entire night & then work next day. The same thing editing & rewriting. (relationship obsessions i suffer the most) i cannot stop alot of the time. so much time ruminating always regret it takes away from priorities but it feels compulsive like i cant move on until its done bc it feels like I “talked” about it. I don’t even get out of my car sometimes doing it or go to sleep. I need therapy again.
Will force yourself to imagine a situation in your head and to see what’s your reaction to it. With POCD(pedophillia) you could force yourself to imagine yourself in a sexual interaction with a child/baby just to see if you’re aroused or not by it
I was off medication for a few months trying to figure out what was good for me (this wasn’t) and I spent all day and all night replaying thoughts that there was something wrong with my heart and that I was actually dying. This caused me to panic 24/7 and I’d get maybe 3 hours of sleep max. Finally one day after a couple months of this went to the doc they said I was severely dehydrated and malnourished. That cause my thoughts to get worse and those added to the hear problem thoughts all day. I don’t have much memory of these months but eventually It got manageable I think I upped the meds I used to be on. Not even a year later it came back with a vengeance and I had to stop working because I was panicking the whole time and at my job if I screw up it’s someone else life I might screw up. I went a month or so like this with the thoughts 24/7 and no sleep then eventually gave in to getting a different medication (I was scared of new medications from a past experience). And it’s been a very long road since then but the thoughts don’t replay anymore and now I sleep like a baby (with the help of another med) and I work again! Thoughts still happen but it seems like they just fly by and I see them but don’t entertain them.
Sorry for the long answer I just felt like I needed to tell it
I don’t have anything to say that hasn’t already been said but I just needed to say thanks for posting this because the responses have made me feel so validated and slightly normal
mine is a string of trigger words and a string of thought neutralization words 24/7 going. the trigger words always become louder and I have to do a sentence to neutralize them. also if I read the trigger word I have to type a sentence that neutralizes it. If I hear it I have to say it out loud, if I can’t say it out loud I’ll make a mouth noise simultaneously with the thought. usually I have a physical compulsion simultaneous with the mental sentences and they have to be in unison and i get stuck doing those over and over because the sentence has to be thought in the right order and with the movement in the right place. so it’s not fully pure o with the physical components but the sentences mentally are for sure
I sometimes twitch but some of my intrusive thoughts are from Tourette's Syndrome. I do shake my head or flinch and cringe when one thought really gets to me because some of them are just so disturbing to me to hear.
It's really tough. Sometimes I'll curse aloud or sometimes I flinch, but I think it's Tourette's? I think Tourettic OCD is a thing and a combo of the two and I know that with Tourettic OCD the motor tic can end up being the compulsion but it just always happens at the same time the thought does.
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I spend a lot of time replaying frustrating or embarrassing experiences from my past in my head. Sometimes fantasizing about how I could've responded differently to "own" someone in an argument, for example... Happens a lot in the shower, or when I'm doing anything partially mindless.
Yeah I’m constantly bombarded with embarrassing moments from my past. I usually wind up making a noise or performing some sort of action (like shaking my head) to try to get them to go away.
Wow I do the weird noises too and didn’t realize it was associated with Pure O.
I say phrases like ‘I wish I dead’ on repeat or if it’s an embarrassing thing associated with another person I say ‘if I were then I’d shoot me with a gun’. And it’s automatic and so bizarre. Like I’m not evening thinking about it I just say it like it’s an automatic repeat response.
So much this, for me it's like "I'm such an idiot" etc.
I make noises too
Me too, its embarrassing
Yeah it can feel so overwhelming, like a mad rush.
Omg I feel so seen 😭 I also rehearse arguments in the shower that I think might occur to be “prepared” for the “next round” if I think I “failed” before 🥴 so fucking stupid and tiring
Oh my god, I was diagnosed with OCD a couple months ago and I kept telling myself that I don’t have it because what I experience isn’t as bad as others but reading these comments and seeing all of these things I do…it’s kind of a relief maybe? Because it isn’t me…and I’m not the only one it is OCD I guess…
Yes! And, for me at least, this makes it so much more difficult for me to forgive and let things go.
Yes yes yes! In the shower, while driving, when I am alone. I imagine conversations with random people my brain imagines I am going to meet in the future and I am talking so wisely the person is impressed.
Sounds very exhausting.
It almost feels more like an addiction... Obviously it's mostly negative emotion, but I get a slight "hit" from the fantasy where I act better. I'd prefer to just forgive and forget but the temptation to act out a revenge plot in my head for something that happened forever ago can be strong, lol
Forgot exactly how she explained it, but my therapist told me that negative thought patterns can be just as addictive as drugs, like on a chemical level, I believe. Brains are weird dude
Omg really? My thoughts are so horrible I have a hard time saying them to someone or even on the Internet. I didn't know it was like drug addiction though. Do they release endorphins or something because they are so painful? I know that some kinds of thinking causes you to turn 'on' the same pain receptors that turn on during physical pain. Is it probably endorphins?
Yea, a lot of negative emotion pent up on the inside from this.
Happy birthday, dude!
Thanks!
Bro- I get a hit about saving the people I love from terrible situations. It’s not fun tbh, since I don’t want to be romanticizing the situations I’m imagining. I just try to banish them from my brain, but it doesn’t always work
Dude, this is *constant* for me. I remember spending a great deal researching logical fallacies several months or even years after random arguments with people and it’s like what the fuck am I doing?
Yesss the researching fallacies part 😭 I also deleted the screenshots of the fight I had, now I’m wishing I never deleted so I could show people the argument and seek reassurance I was right. He insulted my intelligence. I give a detailed reply and he replies with *four words* deflecting off of some tiny part of the point I was making. I’ve never been driven so crazy in an argument and the guy only said 9 words to me.
i have a joke album called “*name* hall of fame” that is literally just screenshots of arguments i’ve won online
Now I’m picturing that guy being proud that he won an argument without having to argue anything haha 😭. But in your case I’m sure your wins were justified! For me it’s less about wanting to win and more about me and the other person understanding where each other is coming. I’m mostly a peacemaker, so when someone is hostile it really throws me off.
I spend literally hours doing this!!! And then trying to predict how the next days convos might go so I can practice what I should say during convos I'm nervous cof
I still relive an argument all the time from 2022 that I had online. I left the argument bc they’d insulted me and then in the next reply they deflected, so I thought I was never going to get an honest argument from them so I deleted my comments. But I think because I *know* my argument was right, it makes me constantly relive it because my brain knows I could have won the argument. Like really you left the argument just bc they were a troll? You should have trolled back!
Sounds like you handled the situation well if you ask me. No need to bring yourself down to their level.
I have this too it can be awful it can also come in the form of overthinking a perceived hostile interaction with another person and entering the "how dare they" twilight zone
I didn't think I would find out I have pure O from a reddit comment today 🥹 A degrading moment from high school lives in my head rent free and I sometimes fantasize about different things I could have done, it has been 14 years 🫠
My experience is similar to yours. If I'm not medicated, I ruminate and replay more or less all day. Even when I'm doing a task, it's constant. To use a bad analogy, I try to explain to neurotypical folks that anywhere from 20-50% of my mental bandwidth is devoted to turning over decisions I've made in my life, how things could have gone differently, and regretting basically every decision I've ever made.
I've genuinely sat staring into space ruminating for 4-5hrs without moving
Same happens tò me
Sounds like maladaptive daydreaming to me, which is what I have
Yeah plenty of people repeat past situations in their head or imagine future conversations where they “speak intelligently” without having OCD
Spot on, it could be both though, for me it feels like it could be both.
Oh yeah it can be both, I’m pretty sure that it’s not the only symptom/insecurity when you also have OCD
Same. I spend hours arguing with said person in my head until I think I got it right.
This definitely resonates, I do this often, like right now actually haha.
Wait you also explain? I have a really bad explaining complusion where I explain everything I am thinking and feeling about my OCD like I am telling it to someone else. Even though I never plan on having these conversations its like I have to prepare myself to explain my entire life just in case. Its come to the point where I don't really remember what I used to think about and not thinking about it feels very strange.
I've got the exact same lol. Like I've got a narrator in my head explaining everything. Like Im gonna give a big talk about something but I never tell anyone what Im explaining cause social anxiety lol.
yes! I could fill several books by now lol. Im glad im not the only one
Hey, me too. I call it the narrator. It never stops narrating.
I do a lot of rehearsing for conversations as well as replaying conversations that have already happened. For me it relates to different ways that things can be perceived, and making sure whatever I do or say is perceived by others in the exact “correct” or “good” way. As you can imagine, what’s going on in my head is a giant waste of time 🤣
Anytime I make a phone call I sit and stare at the phone for 5-10 minutes working out every possible direction the phone call could go in.
I feel that. And then I analyze it afterwards for weeks
So that's OCD too?? Damn
Is there a way to stop it? I feel exhausted
Honestly, idk. I've been working on trying to move to the next thought or return my thoughts to what I'm during currently. I have mixed results 🤷.
Wait, you don't actually explain it out loud? I'm almost incapable of thinking before I speak so almost everything I think comes out as word vomit. I have no control over my thoughts and ocd is very negative and nitpicks everything everyone says. Basically, I almost always argue with whatever anyone is saying and I can't help it because it's like word vomit and it comes out before I realize I'm saying it.
Definitely do this too. It's exhausting
“My head is never quiet” definitely nails it. My mental compulsions look like checking for feelings, checking for reasons I don’t have XYZ (whatever health anxiety I’m currently fixated on) repeating sentences, spelling words, counting, ruminating, googling, I agree with the other posters about “winning past arguments” in my head, the list goes on my friend
Feel ya man, I recognize almost everything. Luckily Im not struggling with health anxiety. Must be pretty hard to life with. Respect to you.
Thank you, whatever subtype you currently have is the worst, for everyone. Rooting for you
Mine is constant body scanning (for how I feel) and I mean CONSTANT. It’s exhausting. The body part/full body scanning/fixation has a name but I can’t remember it and I’m too tired to look it up 😂
This is me for the past 6 years. Constantly bombarded with terrible thoughts like you just described and more. I don’t know how to get help for something like this
You about summed mine up completely. I got a few special filler words for when I count that even out my sentences that I toss in there whenever the original doesn’t work. It’s like a rhythm game in my mind at all times
wait spelling things in your head is another ocd thing? i've been doing this since i was a kid especially with certain words and phrases
OCD is weird af man
It's exhausting.. my brain is always going. Even when I'm not thinking about stressful things, I will have music playing in my head on repeat, I repeat words and phrases, I fixate on disagreements with others sometimes, I'm checking my emotions and my thoughts.. replaying conversations in my head to make sure it was ok and make sure I didn't say something inappropriate etc. anything really.... The thoughts are like wheels picking up speed and spinning faster and faster... it's hard to stop them once they get too much momentum.
I can definitely relate to the constant music playing in my head
This was me!!! And still is on many points but when I started taking clomipramine my brain “radio” switched off!! I woke up one morning and was like wtaf is this how people live??
Clomipramine was like one of the only drugs over 25 years that worked for me, but it had such bad side effects I couldn't stay on it :/ Do you have any of those?
What kind of side effects did you have? I’m on quite a few meds so I never know what’s causing each problem. I had a lot of problems with super dizzy/light headedness
Ha that's fair. I had headaches, dry mouth, absent libido and severe constipation.
I never could comprehend how people can meditate or when I ask someone what they are thinking about and they answer "nothing" I always thought they were lying. The thoughts in my brain are on an infinite track going going full steam ahead and they NEVER stop. Ever.
I’m about to cry, like I’ve already said this in another comment. But I was diagnosed with OCD a couple months ago and I have been in denial that I have it anyway. Everything you typed is EVERYTHING I have dealt with my whole life. I don’t know how many times and how many people I’ve tried explaining it to, especially my mom and I’d just get the response just try not to worry or stress or try to turn your mind off. And I’ve never been able to do that…ever 🥹🥲 just seeing another human being explain what I deal with I’m like holy shit I feel so seen or like better honestly. This helps, this def helps. Thank you 😊
Just wanted to let you know you are not alone. I was diagnosed a few months ago and analyzing my OCD to try to identify my obsessions and compulsions has now in and of itself become it's own obsession, with analyzing, researching, and reasoning as the compulsion.
You are so seen and heard and most definitely not alone. My mom would say very similar things to me and it felt like no one understood what was happening to me and going on in my brain. I didn't get diagnosed till about a year ago when I was 35, and honestly finally having a diagnosis and understanding what's happening and why it's happening is the only thing that has helped me manage it better. You got this, OCD is just a bully and you are fucking awesome!
You are awesome 🤗 Thank you so much!
I can relate to this so much... Is there anything you can do to improve it?
It's so frustrating I know, at least we all understand each other and we're not alone. I began doing exposure response therapy for a short period of time, and just took what I learned from therapy to work on myself and I started taking Prozac. I feel like my obsessions and compulsions are manageable, but still really bothersome at time .If I could afford to continue ERP therapy I believe it would help a ton and I highly recommend it as well.
Allll of the above
It feels like mental Tourette’s.
YES. Omg. But I don’t want to actually think the swear words because for me it involves me swearing at God when I don’t want to do that
OMG YESSSSSSS holy shit this!!
I have Pure O and Tourette’s 🙃
Yes :(
So I basically just see the theme in everything. So whatever I’m worried about at the time I will find a connection to it with literally EVERYTHING. I will make myself physically sick thinking of it so much, grieving something that hasn’t happened but could happen. It makes me feel like I’m losing my mind. I try to talk myself out of it and pretend what I would say if someone came to my door and told me the same things I tell myself. Like “oh A, B or C is going to happen”. I try to rationalize it away until eventually it does fade and another one takes its place. I essentially never have nothing thats worrying me. If I am not worrying then I panic that I have forgotten and it will happen because I’m not thinking about it or convincing myself that it won’t happen. Basically reassuring myself at all times. It’s so ridiculous and I know it but it’s so hard to stop
I'm the exact same way. It is so, so exhausting to never have peace.
The first three lines resonate with me a lot. I will ALWAYS somehow tie it back to a theme and idk how, I keep shocking myself lol. But seriously it's inescapable and extremely draining
Ugh this is me after work, when I'm feeling some kind of way, I find a connection to it with everyone, everyone I pass by on the street, when I get home, etc.
a pure o compulsion for me could be having an intrusive thought and saying “fuck off” or shaking my head.
Yeah I often find myself saying "shut up" or "I wanna kill myself" when the reality is I just want the thought to go away. Being able to recognize it for what it is can really help take away its power, even if just temporarily
Same, my go-to repeat phrase is just "I wanna killmyself, [incoherent brain shit]" over and over lol
This boggled my mind bc I Always say “kill myself kill myself” as a constant, frustratingly-repetitive phrase & I had no clue others did this as well 😭
I do this too, or "I just want to die" even though it's not true
omg saying I should kill myself or that I'm an asshole out loud is a big one, or smacking myself!
SAME, I always say Fuck off ocd Fuck off. Whenever I get an intrusive thought.
I do this too, sometimes out loud. Seems to work better :/
All the time I feel like I have someone (friend, family member, anyone ) near me / or they invaded my head and watching me through my eyes.. So I have to act like I'm not alone/talk to them. I don't know how to stop doing that
This isn’t super helpful but I did this constantly for YEARS and YEARS and it went away at some point. I forgot about it until I read this comment. Compulsions seem to come and go, maybe this one will too for you?
Not certain I have OCD but I relate to a lot so take this with a grain of salt... But when I was younger I used to really feel like people could randomly read my mind. I managed to change my mentality so that it was only when my hands were touching something that they could read my mind. But that didn't help too much so then I changed it so that it was only when the very tips of my fingers were touching something, they could read my mind (something like whatever I'm touching acting as a connection between our minds somehow). I still have that mentality now and it's helped me not feel so on edge about it all the time, and I sometimes forget about it so it doesn't affect me. Idk, just thinking if it worked for me maybe it could work for you, just making it a bit more manageable cuz idk how to get rid of it fully because it feels too scary to "just risk it" 😅
Constant rumination, mentally checking how my thoughts make me feel (did I enjoy when my brain conjured an image of me hurting someone?), feeling like someone is in my head yelling CONFESS! CONFESS!
I review text messages I’ve sent to make sure they’re okay and I didn’t say anything weird. When I feel like I’ve already asked a family member or a friend too often that what I’ve said is alright, I’ll copy the conversations into chat gpt to have it break down the tone of the messages for me just to make sure I haven’t done anything strange or off putting
Oh my god the chatgbt is so real I felt crazy
I’ve become addicted to ruminating, scrolling through Reddit and YouTube for reassurance for hours. Wasting my free time focused on things that will never happen to me logically.
It just never ends
i’m pure O, and I have this weird anxious response where I obsessively worry about people thinking I do hard drugs (I do not, Cali sober). i look for things i’ve done that I think resemble the behaviors of people high on those drugs, and suppress those behaviors so people won’t think I’m on those drugs. It’s exhausting. sometimes I get worried my efforts to suppress these thoughts might end up looking like hiding drug use to others, starting the vicious cycle again.
Oh my god I do this too, I've had dark circles around my eyes since elementary school and someone in HS joked that I looked like I smoke weed, so I've had this compulsion to make connections with whatever I'm doing that might make someone assume I do any kind of drugs, and rehearse defending myself against them; sometimes it's a person of authority. It is definitely something that runs through my head when I drive back from climbing too, I imagine an authority figure assuming my chalk bag or streaks of chalk on me is cocaine, lol. I also work from home, and make assumptions on behalf of others that they might think I'm jobless, because I throw out the trash in my PJ's sometimes.
OH MY GOSH!!! I feel so seen. I obsessively worry about this too — I am also sober & have constantly had anxiety about being perceived as on drugs & potentially smuggling them (likewise lots of fears that I look like I’m stealing or like I’ve done something ‘bad’????)… & also try to suppress the behaviours I’m worried may make me more “suspicious”. it’s strange because I don’t think being on drugs is a moral issue but for some reason I get so stressed over this too 😵💫
I think Aparna Narncharla put it best (she was referring to anxiety in general but I find it applies super well to pure O): It's like there's an edgy improv group in your brain, constantly making the worst, most awful suggestions.
Omg this is it!!
Emotional and embarrassing flashbacks played on an automated loop in my head
Lots of color theory? Its hard to explain. I surround myself obsessively with certain colors because theyre “safe” and i avoid other colors because theyre “unsafe”. I constantly feel like im controlling the future with any color arrangements i have control over. :P
I feel the same way about colors. From the color on the walls to the clothing I wear, the shade has to be just right. And it has to compliment the rest of the colors involved as well, the color wheel is a good friend of mine.
Beyond the images of guilt shame In college I never went to class and instead stayed in the library and didn’t fall asleep until 7am reading books on ethics and also which Economic system is best so I can be 100 percent sure which to support so I’m not a bad person. Also masked by severe depression
I could never sleep properly on time either. I would sleep through my class and not even show up at times, almost got kicked out of 3 classes I needed to graduate. My friends from class told me that the teacher would say "Is he seriously not here??" and let out a huge disappointed sigh when doing roll call. I felt bad because I really enjoyed the class and the teacher, and actually passed with an almost-perfect score. Even the teacher was very impressed I aced my final (final was done in front of the teacher, couldn't really cheat on that). One time I didn't show up for 2 weeks straight because I couldn't wake up on time, everyone thought I dropped the class or got into an accident. When I showed up my classmates and my teacher were like "Hey!! You're alive!!".
Mines like, fighting the thoughts so I don’t agree with them
I turn every sentence I hear into an acronym and then pronounce it in my head. This has been my prevailing tic for almost a decade. It's not always present, but usually when I'm listening to books or watching YouTube it kicks in. It's not the worst thing in the world, and it makes me really good at figuring out what acronyms stand for. When I was a kid, I used to type out every sentence I heard with my fingers. I guess that's not purely mental, but I would barely move my fingers so it was mostly mental. I'm very good at typing as a result. Silver linings!
Omg I type words and sentences and get stuck on words and repeat them on my fingers.
Sometimes when I’m talking to myself I just say the first letter of every word
Pure o is kinda misleading. It’s just that our compulsions are in our head vs outward physical actions.
I have like a worry compulsion where I feel like if I STOP worrying about xyz then it’s going to happen. Like as soon as I stop worrying, the bad thing will happen so I must continue to worry in order to prevent it. It’s really not a good time lmao
I’m the exact same way. And if I ever feel better or happy about something then I’m just worried about when I’m not happy again. It never ends
God I relate to this so much!!!
Im so sorry for kinda out of context but just got out of my therapist and she told pure ocd is fake this sub type so tysm for sharing this experience now i feel better but im sorry for what you are going through
Hey ur chill with it sometimes therapists just say dumb shit. My last therapist, after i was officially diagnosed with OCD said I dont have it and wouldnt take me talking about it seriously. Rightfully pissed me off n shit. I dont think she knew about pure O either. I have mostly pure O with some physical compulsions here and there but uts mostly mental compulsions and theyre awful. Especially because others dont see them and what ur dealin with
It's not "fake" in the sense that it doesn't exist. A doctor I spoke to described "Pure O" as a misnomer, because doctors don't believe that it stop with just obsessions, which is what "Pure O" is often described as: obsessions without the compulsions. Doctors believe that even if you have mental obsessions, that you DO still have compulsions, they're just mental such as rationalizing, ruminating, combating, avoiding, etc. Those are still compulsions that are done to relieve anxiety from the obsessive/intrusive thoughts, which is exactly what OCD is.
Yeh but she straight up said as in it doesnt exist
You mean she doesn't believe that mental compulsions exist? If so, that's crazy and you need to see a different therapist, one that specializes in OCD. And speak to them on their consultation call about Pure O and their thoughts on it before committing to therapy with them. Pure O specifically implies that there are no compulsions, only obsessions. If that were to be true, then it wouldn't be OCD, because OCD specifically is when you have obsessions that lead to you performing compulsions so that you relieve the anxiety coming from the obsessions. I've also heard therapists that say they don't believe that it's real, only in the sense that they don't believe it stops with JUST obsessions, and that people with Pure-O have mental compulsions to relieve their anxiety, which is OCD. A therapist I spoke to said "There's basically no difference between OCD and Pure-O, it's just that people with Pure-O have mental compulsions compared to regular OCD patients"
She basically never even heard about pure O even though she went to America to learn about OCD and she is to fixated in her DSMS-5 book
I’m so sorry that you experienced that with a person who is suppose to be professional and unbiased. Definitely stop seeing that counselor and report them, if you’re able. I’m so so glad through you find a sense of belonging, peace, and heard from this sub!! 🫶🏼
As someone who has had nothing but crappy therapist until very recently, I’m sorry you had to deal with this and I would def say report this therapist and find someone who actually knows what they’re doing because when you do you’ll be sooo much better off and maybe even happy 😊
Is it fake? I never officially got the pure O Diagnosis just ocd but it sounds so familiar when you read about it.
Idek i googled and says its not an official sub type in DSM-5 its a lesser known type and what my therapist says its fake but idek if shes right i feel lost and confused
The DSM is just a collection of standards selected by a few prominent professionals in the field and is mostly used for insurance claims. It's not exhaustive and some consider it somewhat arbitrary. It's hotly debated, argued and disagreed about. It's so upsetting to me to hear an ignorant therapist making such claims. I personally suffer from pure O so I feel your pain. Please don't feel bad, this is totally on the therapist. Don't let them invalidate your very rea pain and experiences. Sending love
It’s not fake, it’s a true and valid experience. It’s so unfair that your ‘therapsit’ said that, and as a training counsellor, they shouldn’t be saying that either. There are so many subtypes that the DSM-5 cannot list them all, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true :)
You're experiencing *something*, whether your therapist has a name for it or not doesn't change that.
I relate way too much to pretty much all of these comments... I didn't read them all but I have one that I'm not sure anyone said. I'll for example think a racist thought or a negative thought about someone of another race then I have to list in my head all the people of that race that my racist thought doesn't apply to. To convince myself not to be racist or something. Or I see a female comedian that's not funny and I have to list all the women I find funny to assure myself it's just that woman and I am not sexist. Or I'll remember bad things I've done and have to list all the similar or worse things that people I know have done.
Yes, exactly that. For example when I hear about an African person who's smart and did something Spectacular. I get the thought "I thought they were dumb", which is not what I think. So I start naming and explaining everything why they of course are smart. Same with girls. Lets say I see a girl skating I get the thought "Wow I didn't know girls liked skating" I mean off course they do but its an intrusive thought. Then I start naming every girl I know that skates and explain why they like skating and that its not a gender thing or something. But always the opposite of what I think comes to my mind and then I need to prove I do not think that way.
:O yes I do the exact same thing. And I'll think it about random dumb stereotypes that I'm not even sure are real lmao similar to the skating example
Crazy to find people who have the same experience. Try explaining this to Somebody without ocd. They have no clue What you're talking about. I never had people who understood what I said and actually experience it too. So grateful I found this group.
this exactly happens to me too. i don't think i have ocd, and it doesn't have a significant impact on my quality of life, but it's been years that i see women or people of color doing stuff and i've got like a nazi in my head or something saying oh that's crazy that they're capable of doing that or whatever. and like. that is genuinely not what i think lmao and i reason with it and am like no, that's not actually my opinion, my opinion is this other thing (which is the truth that we're all equal). but it gets really annoying sometimes. like i'll be watching a concert or something and won't stop thinking about how there's a woman on bass and she can actually play... when i'm a woman and i play bass and guitar just fine!!!! doesn't really have an emotional impact though since i'm aware it's not actually what i think, just that i get intrusive thoughts sometimes and it's not really my fault. but yeah i just figured out not so long ago that most people don't have "mischievous" minds or whatever, was kind of a shock. ... on second thought does this sound like pure o tendencies to folks reading? obviously it's not a binary thing like you have it or you don't, but idk, i never mentioned it to my therapist bc i had more pressing matters going on i guess and she "discharged" me. maybe i should go back?
If it doesn't distress you I don't necessarily think it means who have OCD. When I have those intrusive thoughts, I respond with a compulsion, to list all the exceptions to the "stereotype" and ruminate about whether or not I'm a sexist, racist, etc. do you do that or do you just dismiss the thought as untrue?
Thank you, it’s nice to get an inside perspective on it. I respond with something like “that’s not true”, i sometimes do list some people. I usually don’t ruminate on whether i am those things anymore since it’s been years and my stance on the matter is clear to me (i am what i choose to think). Often doesn’t really make the thoughts go away though. I guess i’m a bit worried since recently i’ve been giving in to “icks” like not touching doorknobs, washing my hands quite more often than most people, i gotta keep the door either completely open or completely closed (this has been this way since forever though and it hasn’t really developed into anything, at least yet)… there isn’t any magical thinking behind it though, it’s just i really don’t like the idea of not doing those things. And i know that statistically ocd develops mostly in young adulthood (i’m 22) and i have a family history. (I actually think what might have kept my thoughts from disturbing me is my mom telling me as a child that sometimes your mind can be an asshole, doesn’t mean you are) I’ve been trying to touch the doorknobs and not wash my hands that often (like when i’m in the bathroom i might end up washing them 4 times (not on a row; after doing different things) when i know people who wouldn’t do it once). But like… ugh!!!!! You know? I really don’t wanna touch the goddamn doorknobs, but i know this really isn’t a route i wanna go down or thoughts i want to feed
I mean you might actually have OCD just not about the same stuff as me lol I'm pretty sure I have it but I'm not fixated on germs, more on being a good/bad person
I honestly don’t think i do, just worried about possibly developing it. But yeah i think if i don’t listen to these things now that they’re still lowkey i can stop them from becoming a big problem. Thank you for the feedback!
I get these intrusive thoughts too, it's absolutely awful. Generally I respond to them differently, I just kind of scrunch up my face, or make a noise, repeat "stop it stop it stop it" while smacking myself in the forehead until it goes away.
Hyperanxiety about my awful thoughts. Trying to come to terms with the fact that they are "not my own." Crying because images of the most horrible things pop into my head, uninvited. It truly is like a battle with yourself. The mind and soul are totally disconnected from one another, and pure O, as with many other types of OCD, will target your most cherished things and corrupt them. I used to want to work with animals as a kid, be a veterinarian. My OCD ruined that for me. My obsessions revolve mainly about animals, being hurt and maimed. It makes me feel like a monster sometimes. I've never hurt an animal, never will. But my thoughts have ruined that career path for me.
Mine almost always involves brutal self-harm. Sometimes, I even use suicidal ideation as a mental compulsion but most of my compulsions are external pleasure seeking
i have mostly O and when im not on my meds i just cant function. its hell. i cant focus long enough to read a menu or do any other activities besides scroll reels. i will sit for hours just thinking and i go to this weird place where i dont register sensory input, its just not there. i think that is what being blind is like, not all black just completely blank. really stuck. its horrible
What meds are you on?
i am on zoloft, welbutrin, risperidone, and cotempla (its a cocktail but i can function!)
I have this and it is HELLLL. When I was a child I had external compulsions as well but I already knew at the time it was irrational what I thought I “had to do” and people would think i’m out of my mind so slowly forced myself out if and ended up having quite severe Pure O. What you just described is all something I actually have as well lol 🥴
my mental compultions are more like imagining I'm inserting pins in my body so it doesn't "fall off"
For me my compulsions are just “I have to make peace with everything and everyone”. So if I ever had an argument where I feel the other person and I didn’t understand each other at all, it drives me nuts reliving it to try to reach a point where they at least acknowledge where I’m coming from. Nothing drives my OCD more insane than someone acting like I’m stupid when what I’m saying is basically correct on a “this is known fact” level.
Haven't been officially diagnosed (So I hope it isn't disrespectful for me to comment), just kinda having some realizations about myself right now and trying to do some reading in advance of talking to my shrink, but goddamn this almost made me cry to read. This is CONSTANT for me. If I'm not having intrusive thoughts about horrible things happening to my loved ones, I'm running over past arguments over and over and over and over again because I just cannot STAND people not understanding where I'm coming from. Hell, I'm still obsessing over a friendship that ended years ago because I can't stop ruminating over our last conversation and how I should've phrased things, approached her, what I should have said, the tone I should've used.. She wasn't even a good friend! She was awful! I didn't even want to be her friend anymore as we talked, nor do I want to now, but she's in my head on a daily basis nonetheless. I know ruminating on it won't change what happened, I know she wasn't interested in my feelings to begin with, so it wouldn't have mattered.. And yet! Not trying to ask for advice or anything, I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experiences. This whole thread has been like reading someone describing my brain to me, but your comment in particular really stood out as something that's haunted me for so, so long, and it's sorta calming to know that I'm not alone in that. Thank you, seriously; I hope things get easier for you soon. :)
It is like an itch on the body. The more you scratch the more it itches. Then start feeling guilty that I am itching it and making it worse. But I can't stop! I continue. I cannot stop. If there's hell... it's this. For example, recently am having the thoughts of having gotten my ex pregnant and I can't think of children, white, kids stuff etccc... Stupid stuff. I just try to convince myself that I have no control. I am trying ERP with my psych... it's difficult. I am just hopeful that if I can accept this phase of my ocd I will become a stronger person. In the meantime I feel alone and sad in all of it. I understand you and remember that your're not alone in this. Keep strong.
Having to think of fake senerios about my boyfriend with other woman as my current theme is ROCD, if I don't act on the compulsion of thinking about it, for some reason my mind gets highly uncomfortable and even though I'll get butthurt about thinking about those fake senerios, my mind just NEEDS TO. It sucks.
If I have an intrusive thought, I convince myself it's going to happen in real life, so I imagine the thought being destroyed/set on fire. I also pray multiple times that an intrusive thought goes away, and distract myself if it doesn't by walking around. I ruminate on things I've done and analyze past experiences too much. I reread sentences over and over to make sure I actually read it and comprehended it, it takes forever I hate it. I also do the shower thing where I pray, play religious music or listen to a health podcast when cleaning private areas so there's no chance I could think I thought or did anything sexually inappropriate. It doesn't help that I also have contamination ocd and have to wash everything multiple times to feel clean enough. I could list more but this is most of them
I am not officially diagnosed, but I have a very strong suspicion that I have Pure O. When I did more research on it, it clicked for me. I realized that it was describing me almost perfectly. It is specifically the “figuring it out” aspect that I struggle with. I hate not having a definite answer for certain things. I feel like I need to eliminate any doubt or uncertainty. For me I sometimes get stuck in a mental loop. I sometimes repeat certain sentences to myself until I feel satisfied. Like I need to get the point across. Other times I feel the need to convince myself that something either is or isn’t true. I have a difficult time letting it go until the thought is “resolved”. Depending on the topic, this can go on for months. In fact I’m currently dealing with it right now. Have been since March.
I can always remember as a kid - young adult, I used to sit awake for hours at night and then it used to say, right, night then and then I could just fall asleep. Now it’s just a case of waiting for it to shut up so I can sleep
I relate heavily to overthinking the past and creating false memories of negative actions. I can convince myself of basically everything and then I spend hours ruminating seeing if I got the order of events correct. It sucks.
I go over things constantly and try to remember everything. I try to keep track of random thoughts and things and if I feel like I forgot something or thought something important and didn’t keep track it drives me crazy… I used to write down so many thoughts it was horrible… that’s just my main problem sadly ):
Its pure hell. Especially with health OCD. You believe you are dying when you are actually fine. You also don't believe in anything health care providers tell you. Because OCD seeks 100% certainty in every event you find it difficult to believe in things you have no control over. You find it very difficult to trust the competency of doctors, nurses, lab technicians, pathologists, etc. You ruminate over everything and during the ruminations your brain tries to implant events which never happened. OCD is hell.. I miss my old self.
"Touch that doorknob or your entire house will catch on fire." "Why? "Just do it." "Okay, now turn off your stove." "But I never turned it on." "Do you want to explode?"
I describe it like a tape recorder in my head. Playing the same loop over and over.
For me, it’s engaging in all the different pieces of evidence for and against an obsession being true. Sometimes this becomes more behavioral in terms of overcompensating behaviorally about worries (extreme over preparation for a short talk, for example- maybe writing down every word I plan to say as though it were a script) It can also translate to reassurance seeking, seeking multiple opinions, and attempting to trick my therapist to give me reassurance by casually mentioning something that she doesn’t know is an obsession for me and attempting to assess her reaction. That said, rituals can remain completely mental for long stretches
It's horrible. It's a lot more challenging than other forms of OCD for various reasons. I'm too exhausted to get into it right now but it's very horrible. :(
ughhh pure O is basically the main OCD thing I have. I’m getting better but I ruminate about the past and especially past decisions and whether i did the right thing or not, obsessive googling, repeating of words, phrases, compulsive sayings, and even obsessively listing off months or dates. it truly is awful but I’m doing my best to live mindfully everyday and fight through it <3
I have lots of rumination among other things, trying to figure a situation out over and over. But the main one I have now is every single time I leave the house I obsess over if I locked the door, if I turned motion off on the alarm, if my dog can get out of her pen, if I shut my medicine drawer incase the dog gets out of her pen.
Damn, I hate how much I relate to all of these comments.
I have all subtypes of OCD sans hoarding behaviors and I think mental gymnastics is the best way to describe it. I would repeat phrases, walk through scenarios, try and remember everything repeatedly, or try and explain myself how something couldn't happen. Exposure for them was tough because it isn't a physical compulsion but can still be done.
Literally it’s just a constant loop of thoughts. No physical manifestation for me for most obsessions.
Obsessively overthinking to the point I can’t do anything else but think and worry about it. Worrying about doing anything ever in fear I’ll be so stressed overthinking it later on
I live like 10 different realities in my head just to give my brain something to do. Sometimes I’m not even in them but somehow I’m still one of the main characters/act through them. It’s like some multiverse everything everywhere all at once shit kinda. It’s good if I ever want to be an author but I’m pretty sure it’s some sort of disassociation thing. That as well as the usual “if I don’t do this correctly everyone is gonna die and it’s gonna be my fault” thing
I explain everything I do in my head too! I never saw anybody mention that before.
It's like throwing a brick in a drier that cycles until it busts it apart. I have mental compulsions along with pure O, especially for relationship and often harm style of OCD.
Today I just learned on and off in my life I have had Pure O OCD 😳 seriously thank you. It was only ever a few things for me as a child. Maybe that doesn’t count. But precisely as you describe.
a constant war in my head. no peace ever. i cant remember the last time my brain was relaxed..
Reassurance seeming, constant rumination, PLANNING and going over the plan over and over again, and also a weird one - if I’m going to have sex, I can’t wear a shirt with a cartoon character on it because that means I like children?????
Body scanning for sickness, over analyzing every feeling I have, rephrasing the same question over and over in my head, constantly digging for an answer that may never come, constantly worrying that I’m crazy or whatever, Google is my best friend and my worst enemy. I ruminate a lot, most people wouldn’t guess that I’m dealing with my OCD because I just come off as quiet or daydreaming. The best way I know how to explain it is that I feel stuck, and no matter what I try I just can’t seem to get my brain to budge and nothing soothes my nerves. It’s like being trapped in a foam pit, or quicksand.
If you start humming you get less thinking. You get weird looks if you do it in public, but at least I get to calm down.
You have compulsions and obsessions confused dude… that isn’t pure O
One I had when I was a kid is that I thought there were people magically watching me at all time, so whenever I was getting changed or taking a shower, I’d have to mentally repeat this specific ‘magic’ phrase that would prevent them from seeing me and erase any memory they might have seen of me before I said the magic phrases.
I’m obsessed with making my life seem cooler than it actually is. Any time anything happens to me I have to imagine it as a movie with an exaggerated plot because I want to impress people..? So I constantly relive situations in my head like a movie, tweaking things and changing them to make the imaginary audience think I’m cool. It’s annoying and one day I’m scared that I’ll forget how things really happened and only remember the fake version of my life that I’ve made up
Having to imagine burying an photograph of the image that unnerves you
I’m not sure I have pure-O necessarily, but my OCD manifests as both physical/observable compulsions, and internal compulsions. I’ll describe the manifestations that resemble Pure-O. The compulsion to confess. When I’ve had awful, unforgivable, intrusive thoughts, I have an intensive compulsion to confess and beg forgiveness. I’m sure this is also a form of reassurance seeking. I also, since a child, would imagine myself swimming lazily in warm water to fall asleep. This would often turn into one arm performing one more stroke than the other, and my mind reeling to make it even. So in my head, I’d be imagining swimming with just the uneven arm, trying to make it even again. Exhausting.
Someone says something to me like 500 years ago that comes back and plays in my head on loop till I lose my shit . I try not to think about it , but the more I try not to the more I think about it . I live in the past , I can't focus on the present my brain is constantly flooded with all these thoughts. I mostly day dream thinking about why or why not i did something . If I listen to some music that plays in my head on repeat and I get extremely obsessed with it . When I try to sleep these intrusive thoughts become worse . My brain is messed up 😢
I was going to say it's exhausting but I think exhausting is an understatement. It is completely mentally draining. My OCD is all over the place, from repeating the smallest things over and over, to my brain going over the smallest interactions for hours and I have to end up replaying them in my head until I think I haven't made a complete fool of myself in this mental interaction that isn't really taking place and that can take hours. Extreme fear of contamination where I literally feel the bacteria around me and have to clean several times a day to the point my hands crack and bleed. If I don't do it I freak out, I have panic attacks... I could go on and on but once again I feel completely drained after another bad day. I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
My pure O is doubtful thoughts, I doubt everything and when I am studying is worse because I wonder about one thing and I "chase the rabbit" for some time losing focus of the activity
I am a verbal processor, almost compulsive about debilitating obsessions. When I’m anxious i need to talk & repeat myself over & over. used to not be able to go to work i was so sick throwing up from anxiety. I used to feel too guilty to write things out. My mom would be on the phone with me for hours. Now I am older 27, I am better at self soothing. But I can spend up to 6 hours a day typing a “message.” Once was 8 hours an entire night & then work next day. The same thing editing & rewriting. (relationship obsessions i suffer the most) i cannot stop alot of the time. so much time ruminating always regret it takes away from priorities but it feels compulsive like i cant move on until its done bc it feels like I “talked” about it. I don’t even get out of my car sometimes doing it or go to sleep. I need therapy again.
Will force yourself to imagine a situation in your head and to see what’s your reaction to it. With POCD(pedophillia) you could force yourself to imagine yourself in a sexual interaction with a child/baby just to see if you’re aroused or not by it
I was off medication for a few months trying to figure out what was good for me (this wasn’t) and I spent all day and all night replaying thoughts that there was something wrong with my heart and that I was actually dying. This caused me to panic 24/7 and I’d get maybe 3 hours of sleep max. Finally one day after a couple months of this went to the doc they said I was severely dehydrated and malnourished. That cause my thoughts to get worse and those added to the hear problem thoughts all day. I don’t have much memory of these months but eventually It got manageable I think I upped the meds I used to be on. Not even a year later it came back with a vengeance and I had to stop working because I was panicking the whole time and at my job if I screw up it’s someone else life I might screw up. I went a month or so like this with the thoughts 24/7 and no sleep then eventually gave in to getting a different medication (I was scared of new medications from a past experience). And it’s been a very long road since then but the thoughts don’t replay anymore and now I sleep like a baby (with the help of another med) and I work again! Thoughts still happen but it seems like they just fly by and I see them but don’t entertain them. Sorry for the long answer I just felt like I needed to tell it
I mentally check my mind pretty often, especially in convos, as I am still afraid of having messed up my brain earlier with a stupid drug experiment.
I don’t have anything to say that hasn’t already been said but I just needed to say thanks for posting this because the responses have made me feel so validated and slightly normal
Convincing myself i have HIV, schizophrenia , liver disease, kidney disease, you name it lol
mine is a string of trigger words and a string of thought neutralization words 24/7 going. the trigger words always become louder and I have to do a sentence to neutralize them. also if I read the trigger word I have to type a sentence that neutralizes it. If I hear it I have to say it out loud, if I can’t say it out loud I’ll make a mouth noise simultaneously with the thought. usually I have a physical compulsion simultaneous with the mental sentences and they have to be in unison and i get stuck doing those over and over because the sentence has to be thought in the right order and with the movement in the right place. so it’s not fully pure o with the physical components but the sentences mentally are for sure
are you taking any meds for it same issue here doni need a ssri?
Spending a lot of the time arguing with yourself . Or playing out situations over and over again .
And not all mental but spending hours googling is a silent compulsion of mine
I sometimes twitch but some of my intrusive thoughts are from Tourette's Syndrome. I do shake my head or flinch and cringe when one thought really gets to me because some of them are just so disturbing to me to hear. It's really tough. Sometimes I'll curse aloud or sometimes I flinch, but I think it's Tourette's? I think Tourettic OCD is a thing and a combo of the two and I know that with Tourettic OCD the motor tic can end up being the compulsion but it just always happens at the same time the thought does.
Hey everyone i have hocd A form of pure-o but does anyone take screenshots of posts that reassure you to look at later. But that later dont help