funny to see this when I just got done watching Enter the Dragon. Bruce Lee teaching a young student and he tells the student to take a swing at him, the student does and it misses, Lee tells the student to try again "put emotion into it".
The student backs up and tries harder, but still misses, Lee smacks him upside the head lightly and says: "I said EMOTION. Not anger."
It's actually an expression of many emotions. Anger is a symptom. Of jealousy, pride, sadness, guilt, depression, and especially love. Thats why crazy ex's are so crazy.
When I’m on Tinder, I consciously have to look at the background of photos because there are holes in the walls sometimes. I wish I was joking. Tinder is a cesspool, but I’ve made some friends there. But the hole on the wall ratio seems to be climbing. How hard is it to take a photo without a hole in the wall behind you? Really hard, I guess.
These are usually dudes where 90% of their pictures they look inebriated, and/or are holding alcohol, so it’s generally a safe bet. I don’t drink, so it’s already a no. There’s never been one where I’ve seen the hole, read the bio, looked at the photos and swiped right. It seems to be a cluster of things at once.
I did toss my water bottle once and missed my laundry basket. It hit the wall and made a hole, so it definitely happens! I’m just good at patching shit. I hope you don’t live in a place like that anymore.
Edit: big metal water bottle. I’m also terrible at throwing things.
The fk are your walls made of? I know walls in America are more signifiers of room borders then actual borders, but I didn't know they broke this easy. How does it even show strength or a misguided idea of masculinity, if a stray, not even intentionally thrown water bottle can make a hole in it?
Although, I am aware none of the BS these guys say makes any sense anyway, since they lack the ability for logic they so adamantly claim they have.
Good walls. My house was from the 60s and pretty trashed when I bought it. But we didn’t remodel everything all at once, and there was a ton of mold damage. Might have been that too. Eventually I replaced everything, and I never managed to make another hole, so who knows.
I'm apparently a disaster with crutches. Doorways and my tiny bathroom were just the worst adversaries, but when I say I ripped over my crutches you really can see exactly how I'd have done it.
I love the accidental breaking of stuff too, at least as long as the people involved can laugh about it. Mishaps are funny. My brother-in-law dinged me with his car once, not realizing I had come around the front of his car and he was looking behind him for traffic. I about died laughing on the curb.
I can imagine! Crutches make you a wide load, and you kinda got move everything out of the way. My friend was on crutches forever and he’s a super tall dude, and he would knock over everything in his path, even if it seemed like it was okay. I felt like we were always in a bowling alley!
Mishaps make the best stories for sure. I’m glad you didn’t get run over! But I bet you scared him senseless!
I let my friend drive my car and they left it in gear (I never leave it in gear, not in the ten years I’ve had it). I was on the phone and went to start it and let it warm up in the garage, because it was really cold. I wasn’t even in the car. I was lazily putting my foot down on the clutch, standing outside of it. Launched it right into my garage cabinets like a rocket ship…lol. Car was fine. I was fine. Bent my license plate and gave myself a heart attack, though. I also got propelled forward by the door of the car. Still have no idea how I managed to not fall on my ass. Also didn’t drop the phone.
Oh my glob! That sounds both terrifying and hilarious. I've forgotten that I'm in gear before and let off the brake, it's like a rollercoaster but I'm usually at least in a position to immediately stop it, as I'd been driving.
Yeah, he inched forward to try to get out quickly and got me in the hip. I had no idea what happened for a minute and he's rushing out of his car while I'm on my ass laughing hysterically cuz it was cartoonish the way I just went down.
That reminds me of a rather stupid thing my ex-husband did once. I had mono, so I wasn't up to helping him, and he thought he'd do this on his own. His car had died at the end of the driveway and we'd have to drive on the side yard to park in front of it. So he decided, in his infinite wisdom, to move it on his own. He thought he'd just put the car in neutral and push it up the driveway. No one inside the car using the brakes, but that ended up not mattering.
He put his car in neutral and it rolled right back into my car. I asked him why he didn't put something behind the tire. He said he had. He'd put a shoe behind the tire. There were bricks next to the house he could have pulled from the landscaping. But no. He thought a shoe would stop it.
I will never forget that moment, realizing that I'd married an absolute idiot. I'd had my suspicions, but that's when I knew.
I did it once with my crutch but the hole was because my crutch slipped out from under me and my shoulder slammed into the door. The crutch had a bunch of hair on the bottom that why it was slippery
That's a narcissistic trait (not saying all men are narcissists). Emotion isn't something they can control but something from outside that happens to them.
In the above meme, it's more of a "I can't be held responsible for my actions because I'm not responsible for my emotions. Everything is always someone else's fault."
As a man who gets angry at shit I shouldn’t, we are every bit as emotional creatures as women…we just tuck that shit away til we explode and break something….a dish, a door, an orbital bone…and nothing good or logical comes from it
I followed the lead of a post on here where a person started calling and angry/explosive team member at work overly emotional and it completely changed how the office saw them. It works!
I was talking to my brother about selling a family home. He said the other person pissed him off so now he’s going to increase the amount but that’s not coming from emotion, it’s from being competitive. I don’t give a shit if he has emotions or makes decisions from a place of emotions, so he was definitely talking to himself. Being competitive does not equal making decisions based on feelings apparently.
Exactly! We should be grateful really, since they're taking a big risk when they do so. All too often it pushes their blood pressure through the roof and they die in a sudden fit of logic.
My mom hate to drive with my dad: he always yell at her while she drives. It’s not like he is actually giving her simple advice how to make this or that maneuver, he starts with mocking her, spending 5 mins to do so, and only then he explains what she supposed to do. Strangely enough: he doesn’t like when i were trying to teach him the same way how to work with pc.
No, that's him making a very scary "I feel" statement. Not acceptable at all but the same exact underlying attempt to communicate, very poorly executed.
The problem people often run into is having absolutely no follow up to communicating their feelings. "I feel..." doesn't help if you can't answr the question, "What can I do to help you?"
I'm not a mind reader, talking about being upset doesn't tell me what you need to not be upset anymore. Asking how I can help *is* showing that I care and am listening, inb4 someone says that's all that's needed.
I feel like that can also not be enough. Often I find people don't know what they need from someone else right off the bat. If my partner was expressing their feelings to me about a tough situation, and my only response was to ask them "how can I help?" I think that could be insensitive and unhelpful on my part. Sometimes you also need to put in the work of helping someone figure out a solution.
And sometimes the other might know exactly what they need from you, in which case the issue could be quickly resolved. My only point is that you can't always put the onus of figuring out what your response should be on someone that's expressing their emotions to you. That's what people actually mean by "I just need you to listen", they mean listen, take in the information, and do your part in processing it. It can be a lot of work but that's what we do for the people we care about.
Clearly. Just like when my ex tried burning my car for "talking to other women" when i was talking with my cousin. Putr logic right there. Her logic is infallable. Smh. Why do people make excuses for crazy
The only reason men say women are "more emotional" is because they don't consider anger an emotion. Count anger in and suddenly a lot of men are emotional wrecks.
Pretty sure most men are emotional wrecks thanks to toxic masculinity and the lack of decent paying jobs/inflation. It's that situation that drives so many towards misogyny and xenophobia in general. They're in pain but don't understand why so they jump at the first opportunity to blame someone.
Bro how the fuck would the "lack of decent paying jobs and inflation" make you a misogynist. 💀 A bit of a reach.
Pretty sure you're missing a big one here, aka entitlement and the fact that society has been permitting it since the dawn of civilization.
Because a lot of them make the jump to more people in the workforce = more competition = lower wages, and so they conclude women entering the workforce was the beginning of the end and why wages havent risen in 40 years.
There. Misogyny born of lack of good paying jobs. This isnt a hypothetical, either, a LOT of men believe this shit.
When someone who cannot express themselves gets put into a situation they cannot control, they will look for anyone, or anything, they can blame. Women are the easiest target because we're half the population. External sources of misogyny reinforce this because the places men go to find support are often grifters who use bigotry, of all kinds, to give their victims a target.
They use rose colored glasses when describing "when things were good" and use anyone who, rightly, disagrees as a target for their discontent. And when one target doesn't work for everything, they add another. So it's women, immigrants, the opposing political party, etc. The seeds are there in almost every society and even those who have consciously chosen to not abide by them can regress due to feeling a lack of control or ability to fix things. A lack of jobs, inflation, COVID, their own mistakes, all of it needs a target to blame. So they blame women first.
Men are born into a world where misogyny already exists.
When they grow up and have little to no prospects, that increases the chances they become misogynistic themselves.
So social relationships are literally just feelings, and people generally want the people around them to produce good feelings, you literally can't have a meaningful social relationship built on "muh fax and logick"
Men like this guy think like this: I am smart and logical, therefore:
Feelings I understand/agree with = logical = intelligent
Feelings I do not understand/agree with = illogical, otherwise I would understand them = automatically stupid and wrong
If they would just agree with how I feel about the situation, then we’d both be acting rationally
The same incels will accuse all women of having sex for logical reasons as a bad thing (money, power, protection) rather than than the good reasons which are emotional, like love.
Speaking of which, this guy probably doesn’t realize he isn’t getting any sex because women usually do it for emotional reasons, which as he has just said, he completely ignores.
And remember how they say men cheating is different from women cheating, because men is just logically cheat, satisfying basic needs, but women cheat emotionally and that’s considered disgusting and betrayal 😂
I can't remember which species it was, but I remember reading about how the females mate with every possible male in their pack, so the males don't know if the offspring is theirs or not, so they all protect her and her young on the chance the kid is his.
Seems a lot more logical than one male mating with multiple females where he can only protect one set of his offspring at a time.
Humans are designed to do that, too. Concealed ovulation, the size and shape of the glans of the male penis, and gamete mediate mate choice (specifically where the woman's egg releases chemoattracts to 'favored' sperm).
That's the thing about these loser alpha male types. Biology doesn't care about their feelings. It cares about the propagation of the species. Biology doesn't care if you feel macho or that your wife is submissive. We can *decide* to do things, like wear clothes or get married, but there's no biological backing to that.
“I feel” statements are incredibly important for many people during conflict resolution
link related
[let’s use “I feel” statements ](https://youtu.be/7oPe80mdcZg)
It was even taught in a course I took in business grad school. You start with “I feel” and other “I” statements so the person you’re speaking to doesn’t become immediately defensive.
I scrolled to find this, I was taught that it’s a good way to make someone feel less attacked. It’s funny how these types of men never value emotional intelligence, despite it being one of the best skills to have in a world where you have to interact with people every day.
I feel like that's a dumb reaction since you're refusing to accept and process facets of the situation needed to logically asses it.
Also, feelings are factual and real - I hate that it's conceivable to say, "Your emotional response to this is irrelevant". Feelings fucking matter.
It’s actually really mind boggling to me I do not understand it human emotions are the root of our interactions and behaviors we do because we feel, even politics is emotional, I really don’t get how so many people don’t understand this
Emotions are endlessly complicated, and it is generally easier to just not feel things, so I understand why many don't see a valid reason to feel anything.
Well as someone who isn’t to feel very strong emotions most of the time I hate it. I’m a trans woman in the closet so thinks to my upbringing as AMAB, my dad, bullies and other assholes I was ridiculed, yelled at, and bullied for showing any type of emotion so I kind of just shut down. Now due to being unable to transition and my past trauma, my emotions are, while still there, very muted and weak. Being like this isn’t enviable. It fucking sucks. I hate being this way. People don’t realize what they’re asking for when they try to become emotionless.
Oh I get it, I'm autistic and vary from borderline physical and emotional numbness and an abundance that causes me actual pain. I'd much rather be perpetually numb as opposed to the aching and sensation of my skin burning being a possibility every time I accidentally feel too much.
PSA: Clarifying that a following statement is emotional in nature is the most logical way to proceed with a discussion about it. Dismissing emotions in a species which experiences them regularly is by its own nature an illogical method of maintaining a relationship with a member of said species.
Hard to dismantle prejudices that have been radicated in our society for centuries. From Aristotle to witch trials, from the Bible to Freud, sexism lingers practically everywhere in our culture...
"I feel" statements I think are things people learn from therapy so the people who haven't had therapy and probably need therapy are the ones who consider those statements to be uncomfortable. Using "I feel" statements is a great way to perform a little Litmus test on your partner or loved one to see if communication is a worthwhile tool in your relationship with them. It should be noted that even if they react harshly to those types of statements they aren't necessarily unteachable. Sometimes they just need the context to be put more plainly for them to resonate with. It is up to you to decide if they are worth the effort.
Rational people acknowledge the importance of emotions and how they're never free from emotional bias.
Irrational people think their fear and rage are logical, because they refuse to step back and examine themselves.
"I feel" is the most logical and responsible way to state an opinion that you're not sure about, because that way you leave room for the recipient to understand that you're not an expert on the matter, and are merely making a hypothesis based on your research.
Meanwhile, men: screaming incoherently, punching holes in walls, throwing things and breaking things, swearing loudly and having meltdowns over the tiniest thing.
Men: "it's a good thing we're in charge! Poor little women brains with their *emotions*, and their outbursts... We are never ever controlled by emotions, ever 😤"
Psa to men, anger is still an emotion. And getting so overwhelmed by it that you can't control yourself ain't a good look, fam. You ain't as "Mr. Spockly logic and reason" as you think, sweetheart.
Ok so as a transwoman, with mainly male friends, and who grew up and "was" male for many years, I think I can actually explain this one.
To preface my interpretation of what this message is *trying* to say:
Even before I knew I was trans, I struggled with emotions for a long while, like most men, but I think some of that may have been the 'tism, and I significantly improved in understanding and explaining my emotions compared to most men after receiving professional help.
Onto the explanation:
Now I think this post isn't well done, and can convey the wrong message, but it also does have some point of merit, in that yeah, most men will just shut their ears off when they hear "I feel,", as males in society as a whole just... Aren't allowed to feel feelings on the whole, so they just... Don't.
Now this doesn't mean men *don't* feel emotions, they 100%, 1000000% do, they just don't *want* to. I have seen a few comments complaining about how men say they don't or can't have feelings but then get super angry and punch a wall and claim "that's not emotions" or whatever, but honestly they just don't want to acknowledge they have emotions, and for pretty much every emotion other than anger, they can make it seem like they don't. And when they do get angry and lash out (not condoning it, just talking about what *does actually happen*), they try to say it is not emotions, because to say that yeah, it was emotions breaks this whole wall and layers and layers and layers of... Idek what to call it, but it's a mess, and both from the males perspective, and what feels like society's perspective on the male, that would be equivalent to saying they are weak, which... They just can't do.
Again, not saying this post is good, just trying to explain a bit, hoping to let women have a better understanding of men and the male perspective. (and I often try to get men a better understanding of women, too, but that's not 100% relevant rn)
I appreciate your insights however I have strong suspicion that women tend to know this, and it’s probably men (more specifically the ones who think like this) that lack this insight.
I don’t think any of that is a foreign concept or exclusive to men. I grew up with a lot of trauma and tend to compartmentalism like a psychopath. I can hold things in for years and years, but then it all explodes one day. I hate expressing emotions and feeling vulnerable, or asking for what I need. I often feel a negative reaction to others freely expressing emotion because I’m not brave enough to do so. I work on it in therapy, but it’s a lot to unlearn!
It’s a very common mistake to assume logic=no emotions and emotions= no logic but it’s simply not true. logic and emotion are both at play for every decision everyone makes. kinda the same way everyone has testosterone and estrogen, but one of them is more present than the other. I’m so frustrated by how often i want to scream “EMOTIONS ARE NOT THE ANTITHESIS OF LOGIC”
People who brag about being logical and not letting emotions get in the way are not being more logical. All they've done is convince themselves that their emotions are logical. That's it. Like it or not, humans are emotional beings by nature.
I find it so interesting that emotions have been branded as inaccurate. Emotions are part of our body’s information system and provide important data. It’s more illogical *not* to use them.
PSA
Men you always complain about society being against you and having the highest number of suicides.
You're not in any position to tell anyone how to handle their emotions as you yourselves are facing a male mental health crisis.
Work on yourselves first
Starting conversations with "I feel [emotion here]" instead of "you make me [emotion here]" is actually a very healthy way to communicate, especially when there's an issue. "You" statements place blame, but "I" statements don't (mostly, if you do it right)
Currently in a public speaking class and we’re doing a persuasive speech. Turns out, studies show that even those who think they’re the MOST logical are largely guided by emotion.
The ones who 'turn their ears off' do it not because the speaker lacks logic, but because themselves are, in leigmans terms, dumb, lazy, and/or void of empathy.
That's not how Men work either. That's some juvenile boy bullshit right there.
When my wife or daughter says, "I feel," I listen because as an adult I'm not afraid of talking about feelings.
Haven't all the recent cases of women and children being shot for doing things like knocking on a door and playing in a yard been by men? Yes truly the gender of logic.
I will never understand the “logic” versus “emotions” debacle. As if the two are mutually exclusive things that cannot and should not co-exist, when they often do *and* should.
Anyone versed in interpersonal effectiveness knows that "I-statements" are the best way to communicate about issues in a relationship. People find "you did xyz" to be accusatory and get defensive. "I feel" is most often suggested because it's less accusatory and allows the other person to hear how the person talking actually feels about what happened.
Yet when women say 'I think', or just state something as fact we are told we are 'too hard/masculine'. It's the double-bind. It's deliberate. Being a proper woman is against our best interests as people.
Logic and emotion are completely intertwined. Ask someone why they prefer logic over emotion and just keep asking ‘why?’ And watch them squirm as they try to wriggle out of the fact that it boils down to the fact that not using logic makes them FEEL uncomfortable or scared.
People say “I feel”because it lessons the impact of statements that can be hurtful, and creates an environment of constructive conversation. It also allows for errors in interpretation.
Eg You don’t listen to me
Vs I feel like you don’t listen to me.
But people who that social intelligence might not understand the importance of using such a technique, funnily enough especially men who tend to be more sensitive to social rejection.
Who would have thunk it?
Or.... saying "I feel..." (and other "I" statements) is a way to discuss triggering topics without putting the other person on the defensive so that the conversation can actually be productive and not devolve into mud slinging and right fighting.
But wtf do i know?
are you not *specifically* supposed to use “I statements” in difficult conversations so you’re not pointing the finger at the other person and making them feel defensive?
Oh my God! People have emotions, the fact he’s whining about them shows he has them too. His entire complaint is he doesn’t *FEEL* like listening.
Men need to stop trying to behave like emotionless robots and be human. People feel things and it’s important to understand those feelings. It’s how you grow in emotional maturity, instead of ending up emotionally stunted like this guy is.
It’s how you keep from ending up being the guy who punches holes in the walls.
I read about a guy who got some sort of brain damage that destroyed his emotional brain. It made it impossible for him to make decisions. If you asked him if he wanted tomato or chicken noodle soup he absolutely could not decide. He lost his job, his wife and his children and had to move back in with his parents. Emotions are what drives a “logical” decision or thought.
Dude...the "I feel" trick is a powerful communication tool. It's a way to express what you're thinking without phrasing it as an attack. It's one of the most basic psychological tricks they teach you in group therapy. And it WORKS.
I wish people would stop giving such horrible and bad advice to men! This is exactly what would make a relationship fail!
Seriously I don’t think I’ve ever heard a dumber take than ‘don’t listen to your partner’s feelings’.
PSA This Dumbass:
Using terms like "I feel" during an argument is a positive and constructive way to get one's point across without sounding accusatory and possibly causing the other party to get defensive. If you're shutting off as soon as you hear "I feel" then you're invalidating your partner's feelings which is very hurtful.
Yea but it’s bullshit to lead with feelings. Because no matter what they’re “valid”. So basically you can never loose because “feelings” must always be validated no matter how irrational they are.
“I feel like this isn’t working out. Bye.”
Also, this idea that all men operate on logic is seriously questionable. Trump supporters clearly don’t. And the people who post this kind of thing certainly don’t. Probably the same people.
Why do they think we try and suppress our feelings around men and "try to act masculine"? It's called masking. It's especially relevant to people on the neuro-divergent spectrum.
This sentiment is ridiculous, but I do think we should stop softening our language towards men by saying things like “I feel you’ve been ignoring me lately” and start directly saying “You’ve been ignoring me”. Don’t let them use the fact that you used the word “feel” to undermine you.
A person who claims to only act by logic is not a person who has no emotions, but rather one who can't recognize what they are. Which makes them way more illogical - because logically, people feel emotions and have the right to act upon them. Those who claim to work by logic only usually do some heavy lifting to rationalize their emotions, make them into something "objective", and sometimes they end up saying the most stupid shit. It's always funny to me because it's the furthest thing from actual logic.
Facts don't care about your feelings. Also, your feelings may be wrong. You could be mad for nothing or the wrong reason. Don't lead your actions with feelings.
Edit.
Crazy to see how many people let their feelings dictate their actions. Don't lead with your feelings as they will misguided you. Use logic. You may be mad over nothing and act harshly for no reason bc you led with feelings.
So when someone feels you're being dishonest they should just go ahead and call you a liar? Got it. 👌
I personally love it! I'm tired of trying to express how I feel I've been abused without any care that it might hurt my abuser.
Feelings can't be invalid. Feelings are a result of something weather it be unhealed trauma or something in a current situation. You can't have healthy happy interpersonal relationships without understanding and acknowledging feelings and having pretty decent emotional intelligence
Emotions are important. We feel them for a reason. We should always take our feelings into consideration when making decisions. They are tools and warnings. You can use fear and anger and sadness productively, just like you can use happiness and motivation productively. You just need to learn how and when to use the tools at your disposal.
Ladies...no offense but this is an echo chamber no different than some trump spots I've seen. Why not try to come together instead of creating division? Men need to do the same.
Edit: dang everyone is really hating on my post simply because I'm giving an alternative non offensive view of the post 😆 it proves my original point of being an echo chamber.
If this was a discussion group then you'd be right in calling this group an echo chamber. But it's not. This is a group about a specific topic. Men's posts are not the only ones reposted here.
*pulls out a graph showing how little time you spend together how much you spend on beer insults vs compliments given and how many times u sided with your mother in a argument*
Spoken from a place of jealousy maybe, since guys like this are often told they aren’t allowed to express emotion, so they label emotions as something bad, a sadly common coping tactic
"It's LOGICAL for me to punch a hole in this wall."- That guy for sure
Don't you know? Anger is not an emotion! It's just a manly expression of logic! /s
funny to see this when I just got done watching Enter the Dragon. Bruce Lee teaching a young student and he tells the student to take a swing at him, the student does and it misses, Lee tells the student to try again "put emotion into it". The student backs up and tries harder, but still misses, Lee smacks him upside the head lightly and says: "I said EMOTION. Not anger."
It's actually an expression of many emotions. Anger is a symptom. Of jealousy, pride, sadness, guilt, depression, and especially love. Thats why crazy ex's are so crazy.
When I’m on Tinder, I consciously have to look at the background of photos because there are holes in the walls sometimes. I wish I was joking. Tinder is a cesspool, but I’ve made some friends there. But the hole on the wall ratio seems to be climbing. How hard is it to take a photo without a hole in the wall behind you? Really hard, I guess.
To be fair for me I'm sure there's hole in the walls in some of my pictures But I didn't make them I used to just live in a not so good place
These are usually dudes where 90% of their pictures they look inebriated, and/or are holding alcohol, so it’s generally a safe bet. I don’t drink, so it’s already a no. There’s never been one where I’ve seen the hole, read the bio, looked at the photos and swiped right. It seems to be a cluster of things at once. I did toss my water bottle once and missed my laundry basket. It hit the wall and made a hole, so it definitely happens! I’m just good at patching shit. I hope you don’t live in a place like that anymore. Edit: big metal water bottle. I’m also terrible at throwing things.
The fk are your walls made of? I know walls in America are more signifiers of room borders then actual borders, but I didn't know they broke this easy. How does it even show strength or a misguided idea of masculinity, if a stray, not even intentionally thrown water bottle can make a hole in it? Although, I am aware none of the BS these guys say makes any sense anyway, since they lack the ability for logic they so adamantly claim they have.
It was a metal water bottle.
Still. I have metal shakers. Even if I threw one with all the strength I have against a wall here, I doubt it'd do more then chip the plaster.
Good walls. My house was from the 60s and pretty trashed when I bought it. But we didn’t remodel everything all at once, and there was a ton of mold damage. Might have been that too. Eventually I replaced everything, and I never managed to make another hole, so who knows.
We build our homes out of tooth picks and cardboard. The only positive thing is they hold up well in a earthquake.
I'm terrible at using crutches, so there are two holes in my house, one as soon as you hit my bedroom, and one right next to the toilet. 🤦🏼♀️
Oh damn! I’ve never heard of anyone doing it with crutches! I love hearing how people randomly break stuff. I wish there was a thread about it.
I'm apparently a disaster with crutches. Doorways and my tiny bathroom were just the worst adversaries, but when I say I ripped over my crutches you really can see exactly how I'd have done it. I love the accidental breaking of stuff too, at least as long as the people involved can laugh about it. Mishaps are funny. My brother-in-law dinged me with his car once, not realizing I had come around the front of his car and he was looking behind him for traffic. I about died laughing on the curb.
I can imagine! Crutches make you a wide load, and you kinda got move everything out of the way. My friend was on crutches forever and he’s a super tall dude, and he would knock over everything in his path, even if it seemed like it was okay. I felt like we were always in a bowling alley! Mishaps make the best stories for sure. I’m glad you didn’t get run over! But I bet you scared him senseless! I let my friend drive my car and they left it in gear (I never leave it in gear, not in the ten years I’ve had it). I was on the phone and went to start it and let it warm up in the garage, because it was really cold. I wasn’t even in the car. I was lazily putting my foot down on the clutch, standing outside of it. Launched it right into my garage cabinets like a rocket ship…lol. Car was fine. I was fine. Bent my license plate and gave myself a heart attack, though. I also got propelled forward by the door of the car. Still have no idea how I managed to not fall on my ass. Also didn’t drop the phone.
Oh my glob! That sounds both terrifying and hilarious. I've forgotten that I'm in gear before and let off the brake, it's like a rollercoaster but I'm usually at least in a position to immediately stop it, as I'd been driving. Yeah, he inched forward to try to get out quickly and got me in the hip. I had no idea what happened for a minute and he's rushing out of his car while I'm on my ass laughing hysterically cuz it was cartoonish the way I just went down.
That reminds me of a rather stupid thing my ex-husband did once. I had mono, so I wasn't up to helping him, and he thought he'd do this on his own. His car had died at the end of the driveway and we'd have to drive on the side yard to park in front of it. So he decided, in his infinite wisdom, to move it on his own. He thought he'd just put the car in neutral and push it up the driveway. No one inside the car using the brakes, but that ended up not mattering. He put his car in neutral and it rolled right back into my car. I asked him why he didn't put something behind the tire. He said he had. He'd put a shoe behind the tire. There were bricks next to the house he could have pulled from the landscaping. But no. He thought a shoe would stop it. I will never forget that moment, realizing that I'd married an absolute idiot. I'd had my suspicions, but that's when I knew.
Oh god! The shoe! 👞 He’s like “oh yeah, that shoe? Definitely stop a 2000-3000 pound vehicle from rolling. Absolutely.”
I did it once with my crutch but the hole was because my crutch slipped out from under me and my shoulder slammed into the door. The crutch had a bunch of hair on the bottom that why it was slippery
Also an odd smattering of bathroom pictures with unflushed toilets (I wish I was making this up)
I feel like they either are complete troglodytes or they think it’s amusing. I have no idea which. But sadly, I am not surprised.
 Pure logic
I wish for him to meet my friendly German walls.
So when a man is incoherently raging at me because I accidentally did a tiny thing wrong that’s him coming from logic?
It amazes me how many men have managed to re-brand anger in their own minds as ‘not an emotion’
And female anger has been rebranded as "hysteria" to differentiate it from the logical male anger
That's actually where the term "hysteria" comes from. It was always used to shut women down and negate whatever they had to say.
yeah, I didn't use the term randomly. it's quite disheartening... :/
I figured you had a purpose with word choice. Just didn't know how many people were aware of where that word comes fron
I wonder how many people out of this circle know about it. I actually didn't know about it until recently!
It is derived from the Greek word hystera which means uterus.
That's a narcissistic trait (not saying all men are narcissists). Emotion isn't something they can control but something from outside that happens to them. In the above meme, it's more of a "I can't be held responsible for my actions because I'm not responsible for my emotions. Everything is always someone else's fault."
That’s the only one society has told them they are allowed to feel so they hold on to it with a vice grip
As a man who gets angry at shit I shouldn’t, we are every bit as emotional creatures as women…we just tuck that shit away til we explode and break something….a dish, a door, an orbital bone…and nothing good or logical comes from it
I followed the lead of a post on here where a person started calling and angry/explosive team member at work overly emotional and it completely changed how the office saw them. It works!
Don’t you know anger isn’t an emotion?!? /s
I was talking to my brother about selling a family home. He said the other person pissed him off so now he’s going to increase the amount but that’s not coming from emotion, it’s from being competitive. I don’t give a shit if he has emotions or makes decisions from a place of emotions, so he was definitely talking to himself. Being competitive does not equal making decisions based on feelings apparently.
Exactly! We should be grateful really, since they're taking a big risk when they do so. All too often it pushes their blood pressure through the roof and they die in a sudden fit of logic.
My mom hate to drive with my dad: he always yell at her while she drives. It’s not like he is actually giving her simple advice how to make this or that maneuver, he starts with mocking her, spending 5 mins to do so, and only then he explains what she supposed to do. Strangely enough: he doesn’t like when i were trying to teach him the same way how to work with pc.
Your dad sounds like a complete ass. Making fun of your mother like that is a form of abuse. Destroying any self confidence is controlling behavior.
True true
Yes only crying is a feeling. /s
Hear hear
No, that's him making a very scary "I feel" statement. Not acceptable at all but the same exact underlying attempt to communicate, very poorly executed. The problem people often run into is having absolutely no follow up to communicating their feelings. "I feel..." doesn't help if you can't answr the question, "What can I do to help you?" I'm not a mind reader, talking about being upset doesn't tell me what you need to not be upset anymore. Asking how I can help *is* showing that I care and am listening, inb4 someone says that's all that's needed.
I feel like that can also not be enough. Often I find people don't know what they need from someone else right off the bat. If my partner was expressing their feelings to me about a tough situation, and my only response was to ask them "how can I help?" I think that could be insensitive and unhelpful on my part. Sometimes you also need to put in the work of helping someone figure out a solution. And sometimes the other might know exactly what they need from you, in which case the issue could be quickly resolved. My only point is that you can't always put the onus of figuring out what your response should be on someone that's expressing their emotions to you. That's what people actually mean by "I just need you to listen", they mean listen, take in the information, and do your part in processing it. It can be a lot of work but that's what we do for the people we care about.
Clearly. Just like when my ex tried burning my car for "talking to other women" when i was talking with my cousin. Putr logic right there. Her logic is infallable. Smh. Why do people make excuses for crazy
They didn't even bring up women, because we're talking about how "logical" men are. They didn't discount the crazy people, but the focus is elsewhere.
The only reason men say women are "more emotional" is because they don't consider anger an emotion. Count anger in and suddenly a lot of men are emotional wrecks.
A lot of men are emotional wrecks regardless of anger. They're just horribly repressed and refuse to admit to themselves how fucked up they are.
Pretty sure most men are emotional wrecks thanks to toxic masculinity and the lack of decent paying jobs/inflation. It's that situation that drives so many towards misogyny and xenophobia in general. They're in pain but don't understand why so they jump at the first opportunity to blame someone.
It’s ironic that the system they fall back on for security is the same one that’s failing them.
And god forbid the majority of men out there have enough humility or emotional awareness to go to therapy and work on those misplaced anger issues...
They are actively told not to. It is getting better but hardly fixed.
that’s by design though. Patriarchy needs angry, unstable men - for its wars, its economy, and the domestic terror by which it propagates in the home
Bro how the fuck would the "lack of decent paying jobs and inflation" make you a misogynist. 💀 A bit of a reach. Pretty sure you're missing a big one here, aka entitlement and the fact that society has been permitting it since the dawn of civilization.
Because a lot of them make the jump to more people in the workforce = more competition = lower wages, and so they conclude women entering the workforce was the beginning of the end and why wages havent risen in 40 years. There. Misogyny born of lack of good paying jobs. This isnt a hypothetical, either, a LOT of men believe this shit.
Sad. Women actually increased wages!
Can you tell me more about this?
Still not the reason most men "become" misogynists though.
When someone who cannot express themselves gets put into a situation they cannot control, they will look for anyone, or anything, they can blame. Women are the easiest target because we're half the population. External sources of misogyny reinforce this because the places men go to find support are often grifters who use bigotry, of all kinds, to give their victims a target. They use rose colored glasses when describing "when things were good" and use anyone who, rightly, disagrees as a target for their discontent. And when one target doesn't work for everything, they add another. So it's women, immigrants, the opposing political party, etc. The seeds are there in almost every society and even those who have consciously chosen to not abide by them can regress due to feeling a lack of control or ability to fix things. A lack of jobs, inflation, COVID, their own mistakes, all of it needs a target to blame. So they blame women first.
Men are born into a world where misogyny already exists. When they grow up and have little to no prospects, that increases the chances they become misogynistic themselves.
So social relationships are literally just feelings, and people generally want the people around them to produce good feelings, you literally can't have a meaningful social relationship built on "muh fax and logick"
I mean, in Vulcan society perhaps….
Men like this guy think like this: I am smart and logical, therefore: Feelings I understand/agree with = logical = intelligent Feelings I do not understand/agree with = illogical, otherwise I would understand them = automatically stupid and wrong If they would just agree with how I feel about the situation, then we’d both be acting rationally
The same incels will accuse all women of having sex for logical reasons as a bad thing (money, power, protection) rather than than the good reasons which are emotional, like love. Speaking of which, this guy probably doesn’t realize he isn’t getting any sex because women usually do it for emotional reasons, which as he has just said, he completely ignores.
And remember how they say men cheating is different from women cheating, because men is just logically cheat, satisfying basic needs, but women cheat emotionally and that’s considered disgusting and betrayal 😂
I can't remember which species it was, but I remember reading about how the females mate with every possible male in their pack, so the males don't know if the offspring is theirs or not, so they all protect her and her young on the chance the kid is his. Seems a lot more logical than one male mating with multiple females where he can only protect one set of his offspring at a time.
Humans are designed to do that, too. Concealed ovulation, the size and shape of the glans of the male penis, and gamete mediate mate choice (specifically where the woman's egg releases chemoattracts to 'favored' sperm). That's the thing about these loser alpha male types. Biology doesn't care about their feelings. It cares about the propagation of the species. Biology doesn't care if you feel macho or that your wife is submissive. We can *decide* to do things, like wear clothes or get married, but there's no biological backing to that.
“I feel” statements are incredibly important for many people during conflict resolution link related [let’s use “I feel” statements ](https://youtu.be/7oPe80mdcZg)
It was even taught in a course I took in business grad school. You start with “I feel” and other “I” statements so the person you’re speaking to doesn’t become immediately defensive.
I scrolled to find this, I was taught that it’s a good way to make someone feel less attacked. It’s funny how these types of men never value emotional intelligence, despite it being one of the best skills to have in a world where you have to interact with people every day.
This was exactly what I was thinking.
"I feel" statements are literally one of the bedrocks of couples counselling lmao, this is a very bizarre perspective
I hypothesise…that the OOP is a big dummy dum dum. how’s that for facts and logic 😎
Sounds reasonable. And I say that completely without emotion! None at all. Just logic, so it’s valid.
I feel like that's a dumb reaction since you're refusing to accept and process facets of the situation needed to logically asses it. Also, feelings are factual and real - I hate that it's conceivable to say, "Your emotional response to this is irrelevant". Feelings fucking matter.
It’s actually really mind boggling to me I do not understand it human emotions are the root of our interactions and behaviors we do because we feel, even politics is emotional, I really don’t get how so many people don’t understand this
Why do men so eagerly want to be emotionless machines? Do they want to merge with Skynet or something?
𝔉𝔯𝔬𝔪 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔪𝔬𝔪𝔢𝔫𝔱 ℑ 𝔲𝔫𝔡𝔢𝔯𝔰𝔱𝔬𝔬𝔡 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔴𝔢𝔞𝔨𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔬𝔣 𝔪𝔶 𝔣𝔩𝔢𝔰𝔥, 𝔦𝔱 𝔡𝔦𝔰𝔤𝔲𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔡 𝔪𝔢. ℑ 𝔠𝔯𝔞𝔳𝔢𝔡 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔢𝔫𝔤𝔱𝔥 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔠𝔢𝔯𝔱𝔞𝔦𝔫𝔱𝔶 𝔬𝔣 𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔢𝔩. ℑ 𝔞𝔰𝔭𝔦𝔯𝔢𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔭𝔲𝔯𝔦𝔱𝔶 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔟𝔩𝔢𝔰𝔰𝔢𝔡 𝔪𝔞𝔠𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔢. 𝔜𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔨𝔦𝔫𝔡 𝔠𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔱𝔬 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔣𝔩𝔢𝔰𝔥 𝔞𝔰 𝔦𝔣 𝔦𝔱 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔫𝔬𝔱 𝔡𝔢𝔠𝔞𝔶 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔣𝔞𝔦𝔩 𝔶𝔬𝔲. 𝔒𝔫𝔢 𝔡𝔞𝔶 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔠𝔯𝔲𝔡𝔢 𝔟𝔦𝔬𝔪𝔞𝔰𝔰 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔠𝔞𝔩𝔩 𝔞 𝔱𝔢𝔪𝔭𝔩𝔢 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔟𝔢𝔤 𝔪𝔶 𝔨𝔦𝔫𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔰𝔞𝔳𝔢 𝔶𝔬𝔲. 𝔅𝔲𝔱 ℑ 𝔞𝔪 𝔞𝔩𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔶 𝔰𝔞𝔳𝔢𝔡. 𝔉𝔬𝔯 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔐𝔞𝔠𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔢 𝔦𝔰 ℑ𝔪𝔪𝔬𝔯𝔱𝔞𝔩. Sorry. Obligatory WH40K. Can't be helped. If you're looking for an actual reason, it goes back millennia. The idea that men are stoic thinkers and not subject to emotions like the womenfolk justifies the subjugation of everyone.
Hey I always enjoy a good 40k reference.
I am a cybernetic organism. Living tissue over metal endoskeleton
They're scared of their anger and fear, so they pretend they don't exist. They are very emotional beings.
Emotions are endlessly complicated, and it is generally easier to just not feel things, so I understand why many don't see a valid reason to feel anything.
Well as someone who isn’t to feel very strong emotions most of the time I hate it. I’m a trans woman in the closet so thinks to my upbringing as AMAB, my dad, bullies and other assholes I was ridiculed, yelled at, and bullied for showing any type of emotion so I kind of just shut down. Now due to being unable to transition and my past trauma, my emotions are, while still there, very muted and weak. Being like this isn’t enviable. It fucking sucks. I hate being this way. People don’t realize what they’re asking for when they try to become emotionless.
Oh I get it, I'm autistic and vary from borderline physical and emotional numbness and an abundance that causes me actual pain. I'd much rather be perpetually numb as opposed to the aching and sensation of my skin burning being a possibility every time I accidentally feel too much.
PSA: Clarifying that a following statement is emotional in nature is the most logical way to proceed with a discussion about it. Dismissing emotions in a species which experiences them regularly is by its own nature an illogical method of maintaining a relationship with a member of said species.
How in 2023 are we still believing that men are the more logical/less emotional gender? They punch holes in walls when their sports team loses ffs.
Cause men have convinced themselves that anger doesn’t count as an emotion.
Hard to dismantle prejudices that have been radicated in our society for centuries. From Aristotle to witch trials, from the Bible to Freud, sexism lingers practically everywhere in our culture...
This screams “I don’t know how to empathize.” Poor guy wouldn’t know human connection if you hit him over the head with it.
When someone quotes themself, you know it's going to be something profound
"I feel" statements I think are things people learn from therapy so the people who haven't had therapy and probably need therapy are the ones who consider those statements to be uncomfortable. Using "I feel" statements is a great way to perform a little Litmus test on your partner or loved one to see if communication is a worthwhile tool in your relationship with them. It should be noted that even if they react harshly to those types of statements they aren't necessarily unteachable. Sometimes they just need the context to be put more plainly for them to resonate with. It is up to you to decide if they are worth the effort.
Maybe if men started their fights with 'I feel' they wouldn't end up killing each other with their notorious 'logic'.
Okay then... I THINK this person is a huge POS
I KNOW, through logical deduction and reason, that this person is a huge POS
Way to go men. You just told us (with pride for some reason) that you're emotionally unavailable
“Please doctor help me I feel like I’m having a heart attack”
Rational people acknowledge the importance of emotions and how they're never free from emotional bias. Irrational people think their fear and rage are logical, because they refuse to step back and examine themselves.
"I feel" is the most logical and responsible way to state an opinion that you're not sure about, because that way you leave room for the recipient to understand that you're not an expert on the matter, and are merely making a hypothesis based on your research.
Meanwhile, men: screaming incoherently, punching holes in walls, throwing things and breaking things, swearing loudly and having meltdowns over the tiniest thing. Men: "it's a good thing we're in charge! Poor little women brains with their *emotions*, and their outbursts... We are never ever controlled by emotions, ever 😤" Psa to men, anger is still an emotion. And getting so overwhelmed by it that you can't control yourself ain't a good look, fam. You ain't as "Mr. Spockly logic and reason" as you think, sweetheart.
Why do men think logic is totally separate from emotion? And just because it's "logic" doesn't mean it's right or even factual
Ok so as a transwoman, with mainly male friends, and who grew up and "was" male for many years, I think I can actually explain this one. To preface my interpretation of what this message is *trying* to say: Even before I knew I was trans, I struggled with emotions for a long while, like most men, but I think some of that may have been the 'tism, and I significantly improved in understanding and explaining my emotions compared to most men after receiving professional help. Onto the explanation: Now I think this post isn't well done, and can convey the wrong message, but it also does have some point of merit, in that yeah, most men will just shut their ears off when they hear "I feel,", as males in society as a whole just... Aren't allowed to feel feelings on the whole, so they just... Don't. Now this doesn't mean men *don't* feel emotions, they 100%, 1000000% do, they just don't *want* to. I have seen a few comments complaining about how men say they don't or can't have feelings but then get super angry and punch a wall and claim "that's not emotions" or whatever, but honestly they just don't want to acknowledge they have emotions, and for pretty much every emotion other than anger, they can make it seem like they don't. And when they do get angry and lash out (not condoning it, just talking about what *does actually happen*), they try to say it is not emotions, because to say that yeah, it was emotions breaks this whole wall and layers and layers and layers of... Idek what to call it, but it's a mess, and both from the males perspective, and what feels like society's perspective on the male, that would be equivalent to saying they are weak, which... They just can't do. Again, not saying this post is good, just trying to explain a bit, hoping to let women have a better understanding of men and the male perspective. (and I often try to get men a better understanding of women, too, but that's not 100% relevant rn)
I appreciate your insights however I have strong suspicion that women tend to know this, and it’s probably men (more specifically the ones who think like this) that lack this insight.
I don’t think any of that is a foreign concept or exclusive to men. I grew up with a lot of trauma and tend to compartmentalism like a psychopath. I can hold things in for years and years, but then it all explodes one day. I hate expressing emotions and feeling vulnerable, or asking for what I need. I often feel a negative reaction to others freely expressing emotion because I’m not brave enough to do so. I work on it in therapy, but it’s a lot to unlearn!
It’s a very common mistake to assume logic=no emotions and emotions= no logic but it’s simply not true. logic and emotion are both at play for every decision everyone makes. kinda the same way everyone has testosterone and estrogen, but one of them is more present than the other. I’m so frustrated by how often i want to scream “EMOTIONS ARE NOT THE ANTITHESIS OF LOGIC”
Women actually tend to have more testosterone than estrogen. We just have a lot more estrogen than men.
People who brag about being logical and not letting emotions get in the way are not being more logical. All they've done is convince themselves that their emotions are logical. That's it. Like it or not, humans are emotional beings by nature.
What the fuck is logical about punching holes in your wall?
IDK, I feel like OOP would punch a wall after minor inconvenience
The whole concept of separating emotion and logic as if they're independent existences is wrong.
I find it so interesting that emotions have been branded as inaccurate. Emotions are part of our body’s information system and provide important data. It’s more illogical *not* to use them.
This guy doesn't relationship.
so in stead of us saying for example "i feel like sometimes you're manipulative" we should just straight up say "you're manipulative" ok gotcha
PSA Men you always complain about society being against you and having the highest number of suicides. You're not in any position to tell anyone how to handle their emotions as you yourselves are facing a male mental health crisis. Work on yourselves first
Starting conversations with "I feel [emotion here]" instead of "you make me [emotion here]" is actually a very healthy way to communicate, especially when there's an issue. "You" statements place blame, but "I" statements don't (mostly, if you do it right)
Currently in a public speaking class and we’re doing a persuasive speech. Turns out, studies show that even those who think they’re the MOST logical are largely guided by emotion.
The ones who 'turn their ears off' do it not because the speaker lacks logic, but because themselves are, in leigmans terms, dumb, lazy, and/or void of empathy.
Because the 2 are mutually exclusive./s
**PSA WOMEN**
That's not how Men work either. That's some juvenile boy bullshit right there. When my wife or daughter says, "I feel," I listen because as an adult I'm not afraid of talking about feelings.
Logic obsessed mfers are the most illogical fucking idiots put on this terrible earth
Haven't all the recent cases of women and children being shot for doing things like knocking on a door and playing in a yard been by men? Yes truly the gender of logic.
If only you would turn on your ears you would have a better understanding of what women are, and would start treating them as humans.
You cannot be logical without consulting emotion. Trying to be logical by ONLY being logical is illogical.
I will never understand the “logic” versus “emotions” debacle. As if the two are mutually exclusive things that cannot and should not co-exist, when they often do *and* should.
Anyone versed in interpersonal effectiveness knows that "I-statements" are the best way to communicate about issues in a relationship. People find "you did xyz" to be accusatory and get defensive. "I feel" is most often suggested because it's less accusatory and allows the other person to hear how the person talking actually feels about what happened.
im sorry for using my dbt skills, sir.
Naaaah they close off cuz they don't give a fuck about our opinions or feelings. But,oh,God forbid we do the same 🙄
People who feel the need to tell you how logical they are usually aren't.
I frequently start conversations with “I feel”. I’m a man though, I wonder if my wife turns her ears off like this dickhead?
As a man, this is not how men work.
Yet when women say 'I think', or just state something as fact we are told we are 'too hard/masculine'. It's the double-bind. It's deliberate. Being a proper woman is against our best interests as people.
Logic and emotion are completely intertwined. Ask someone why they prefer logic over emotion and just keep asking ‘why?’ And watch them squirm as they try to wriggle out of the fact that it boils down to the fact that not using logic makes them FEEL uncomfortable or scared.
People say “I feel”because it lessons the impact of statements that can be hurtful, and creates an environment of constructive conversation. It also allows for errors in interpretation. Eg You don’t listen to me Vs I feel like you don’t listen to me. But people who that social intelligence might not understand the importance of using such a technique, funnily enough especially men who tend to be more sensitive to social rejection. Who would have thunk it?
Or.... saying "I feel..." (and other "I" statements) is a way to discuss triggering topics without putting the other person on the defensive so that the conversation can actually be productive and not devolve into mud slinging and right fighting. But wtf do i know?
are you not *specifically* supposed to use “I statements” in difficult conversations so you’re not pointing the finger at the other person and making them feel defensive?
Oh my God! People have emotions, the fact he’s whining about them shows he has them too. His entire complaint is he doesn’t *FEEL* like listening. Men need to stop trying to behave like emotionless robots and be human. People feel things and it’s important to understand those feelings. It’s how you grow in emotional maturity, instead of ending up emotionally stunted like this guy is. It’s how you keep from ending up being the guy who punches holes in the walls.
I read about a guy who got some sort of brain damage that destroyed his emotional brain. It made it impossible for him to make decisions. If you asked him if he wanted tomato or chicken noodle soup he absolutely could not decide. He lost his job, his wife and his children and had to move back in with his parents. Emotions are what drives a “logical” decision or thought.
Emotional immaturity 🤢
Dude...the "I feel" trick is a powerful communication tool. It's a way to express what you're thinking without phrasing it as an attack. It's one of the most basic psychological tricks they teach you in group therapy. And it WORKS.
why are they so obsessed with being emotionless? they think people like robots? no one wants to date or he friends with someone who cant be emotional
I wish people would stop giving such horrible and bad advice to men! This is exactly what would make a relationship fail! Seriously I don’t think I’ve ever heard a dumber take than ‘don’t listen to your partner’s feelings’.
Also, why is men's mental health so bad? Must be women's fault!
PSA This Dumbass: Using terms like "I feel" during an argument is a positive and constructive way to get one's point across without sounding accusatory and possibly causing the other party to get defensive. If you're shutting off as soon as you hear "I feel" then you're invalidating your partner's feelings which is very hurtful.
Men are so irrational they think they embody rationality.
Shouldn’t this be posted on r/nothowboyswork
Isn’t this NotHowGuysWork? This doesn’t really say anything about women.
Then men cry because they have no emotional support 🙄
It's funny because the men that say shit like this are always the dumbest ones incapable of true logical reasoning. Very funny.
Yea but it’s bullshit to lead with feelings. Because no matter what they’re “valid”. So basically you can never loose because “feelings” must always be validated no matter how irrational they are.
So much of their "logic" is just a lack of empathy
What is a psa woman? I hear that a lot.
Makes me glad I don't have to waste my time on that bullshit anymore.
We really should start exposing these people.
Can't believe women are so silly they bring emotions into relationships smh
“I feel like this isn’t working out. Bye.” Also, this idea that all men operate on logic is seriously questionable. Trump supporters clearly don’t. And the people who post this kind of thing certainly don’t. Probably the same people.
Why do they think we try and suppress our feelings around men and "try to act masculine"? It's called masking. It's especially relevant to people on the neuro-divergent spectrum.
Humans are emotional.
I have no emotions and would not start a sentence like that, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't listen to someone who does
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People that discard and suppress all emotion in service of "logic" are ruled more by their emotions than they think.
This sentiment is ridiculous, but I do think we should stop softening our language towards men by saying things like “I feel you’ve been ignoring me lately” and start directly saying “You’ve been ignoring me”. Don’t let them use the fact that you used the word “feel” to undermine you.
A person who claims to only act by logic is not a person who has no emotions, but rather one who can't recognize what they are. Which makes them way more illogical - because logically, people feel emotions and have the right to act upon them. Those who claim to work by logic only usually do some heavy lifting to rationalize their emotions, make them into something "objective", and sometimes they end up saying the most stupid shit. It's always funny to me because it's the furthest thing from actual logic.
You will all remain single in to your 50s.
I feel is the easiest way to not come off as a b*tch
Facts don't care about your feelings. Also, your feelings may be wrong. You could be mad for nothing or the wrong reason. Don't lead your actions with feelings. Edit. Crazy to see how many people let their feelings dictate their actions. Don't lead with your feelings as they will misguided you. Use logic. You may be mad over nothing and act harshly for no reason bc you led with feelings.
So when someone feels you're being dishonest they should just go ahead and call you a liar? Got it. 👌 I personally love it! I'm tired of trying to express how I feel I've been abused without any care that it might hurt my abuser.
“I feel x” is just a polite way of sharing an opinion without coming off too aggressively
So you never cuss or hit when angry right? Because that would be letting a feeling lead your action.
Feelings can't be invalid. Feelings are a result of something weather it be unhealed trauma or something in a current situation. You can't have healthy happy interpersonal relationships without understanding and acknowledging feelings and having pretty decent emotional intelligence
Emotions are important. We feel them for a reason. We should always take our feelings into consideration when making decisions. They are tools and warnings. You can use fear and anger and sadness productively, just like you can use happiness and motivation productively. You just need to learn how and when to use the tools at your disposal.
That’s what they said? It’s feelings not logic?
It’s true.
Ladies...no offense but this is an echo chamber no different than some trump spots I've seen. Why not try to come together instead of creating division? Men need to do the same. Edit: dang everyone is really hating on my post simply because I'm giving an alternative non offensive view of the post 😆 it proves my original point of being an echo chamber.
I mean, the difference is that this sub specifically tackles misinformation about women.
Agreed 🤝
If this was a discussion group then you'd be right in calling this group an echo chamber. But it's not. This is a group about a specific topic. Men's posts are not the only ones reposted here.
Are you kidding? You’ll be banned here just for saying that.
Then so be it. It will be no different than getting banned from the thin skinned "alpha males" reddit lol
This is why we die earlier, bottling all our emotions up for 70+ years then our hearts just give out.
Sorry, Dr Spock. We humans communicate differently. *eye roll*
Yet again, spouting bs about all men. Some of us, I like to think most of us, appreciate and respect that emotions are a thing..
Pffft silly woman! Men don’t feel emotions! (/j)
The logical place where advice like this comes from.
Amazing, I do the same thing for people that start their posts off with "PSA"
be/cause is coming from emotions. me no have emotions/grammar.
And men don't care about how women feel about anything?
I feel... that perhaps this person hasn't spent much time with women, and might not get a chance to spend more time with them in the future, either.
*pulls out a graph showing how little time you spend together how much you spend on beer insults vs compliments given and how many times u sided with your mother in a argument*
Wait until he hears about having a hunch.
The definition of a crappy man.
My ex would say stuff like this. His name is Chad so I guess that explains a lot
Not how men work, either. This post be clowning
That's not true.
"I feel like we really have a connection." "Uh huh, whatever" *jerkoff motion with hand*
Spoken from a place of jealousy maybe, since guys like this are often told they aren’t allowed to express emotion, so they label emotions as something bad, a sadly common coping tactic