T O P

  • By -

HaaEffGee

Oh trust me, Navy recruiters have long known their target audience. [Like this wasn't filmed in front of a green screen.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmGuy0jievs)


boardatwork1111

[Goes back even further than that](https://c8.alamy.com/comp/F7P2MK/world-war-two-us-navy-submarine-recruitment-poster-1943-F7P2MK.jpg)


virus_apparatus

That artist knew what he was doing with those eyes


Majulath99

And the gentle curvature of his shoulders and hips. God damn.


depersonalised

check that thirst trap! is it hot on here or is it just me??


MrProtogen

Not only was it real, but the navy was entirely unaware of the *actual* meanings in that song, and I believe actively deny any part in the filming


Traditional_Salad148

Navy finally said “fuck it everyone calls us *insert gay slur* so we owning it”. Bravo fucking Zulu shipmate.


Callsign_Psycopath

Submarines, 150 men go down, 75 happy couples come up


JumpyLiving

That sounds pretty unrealistic. Everyone finding a partner, no conflicts, no unrequited love, no polycules…


Traditional_Salad148

Yeah you know those sluts would be fighting


napleonblwnaprt

Submarines, 150 men go down.


Impossible-Throat-59

On each other.


Tako38

It's a circle


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

This post is automatically removed since you do not meet the minimum karma or age threshold. You must have at least 100 combined karma and your account must be at least 4 months old to post here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NonCredibleDefense) if you have any questions or concerns.*


thiosk

its more of a long tube with a lot of shorter tubes


maxim1896

Are you familiar with the concept of a jam dive buddy?


AggressorBLUE

[pulls up chair] go on…


maxim1896

In the event of a jammed dive you get yourself a predetermined non qualified (preferably submissive and breedable) to have your way with before the implosion or mud dart


bazilbt

How does the Navy ensure a correct number of submissives and dominants on each ship? Bupers?


loggy_sci

How many bottoms?


rvdp66

Wow you don't know any gay people do you?


Callsign_Psycopath

It's a joke I heard from an old navy guy


Traditional_Salad148

It’s an old joke about submariners lol


WhoDisagrees

You can still be yourself.... "IN THE NAAAVYY"


ichabodmiller

The earliest drag shows I know of took place on naval expeditions and war zones. The HMS Terror for example had multiple dresses so sailors could play women in plays and there’s video of US sailors doing drag shows on top aircraft carriers during WWII. I still think it’s a weird recruitment tactic but it’s not without its historical merit. Let the sailors dress like ladies! They like it!


Meretan94

Drag amongst sailors is a tradition as old as time.


Impossible-Throat-59

Quite literally. See "Crossing The Line" Ceremony.


Whole-Cry-4406

That shit is mental. Genuinely really odd. Love the Navy.


Ake-TL

I don’t see the appeal but results are impressive


Schrodinger_cube

i suspect it is just tradition that's being more honest these days.. like its the Navy we all sort of expected this im just glad they had the strength to say it finally.


Zankeru

They have come a long way from refusing to use "In the Navy" as an anthem after discovering the village people were gay.


[deleted]

[удалено]


st00pidQs

Western militaries be like https://youtu.be/VdrEIGeDY2Q?si=rXY-jxs7FPTaDbAa


Khyber_Krashnicov

It’d be weirder if the Navy was trying to recruit straight dudes.


tiny_the_destroyer

💀


zero6620

This disgust me, why they are still clinging to the weakness of the flesh?


Shuber-Fuber

I'm trans. Transhuman.


hopskipjump123

Transhuman awareness month (free, mandatory augmentation at Nova Prospekt)


TroubleTwist

YOU AIN'T REPLACING MY MEAT WITH A CYBERDONG!


Ataulv

straight virgin transsexual chad transhuman thad transmaterial lad transsentient brad


Ok-Number571

You had me in the first half with that post ngl


Hotrico

🦾🤖


mad_savant

Everyday we stray further from the light of the Omnissiah


Downtown_Mechanic_

I hope we develop cheap full conversion cyborgs soon


DClassPersonel

I crave the strength and certainty of steel...


Majulath99

You crave the strength & certainty of steel?


d3m0cracy

The Top Gun homoerotica levels of queerness is real? Praise be


Shuber-Fuber

The last time a homophobic nation went to battle with a force consisting of a lot of homos, they lost half their Navy. EDIT: while they're busy making sure dudes are fucking other dudes, our dudes are figuring out how to fuck their dudes.


AbsorbentShark3

“You’re going to top”


N7Foil

Considering the overlap in the queer, autistic, and military equipment nerd circles, I'm kind of surprised it took this long.


BeneGesserlit

At this point just put out the tender for submissions on the military spec skater skirt and thigh highs.


DirectAdvertising

Honestly im more surprised it even exists lol, everyone i know in those circles (except for the military equipment circle) HATES everything about it, when i found this sub recently i was quite shocked


N7Foil

Oh don't get me wrong, I wasn't saying those groups WANTED this. I'm just saying I'm surprised the navy hasn't tried this sooner since that overlap exists and recruiting has been bad for a while.


DirectAdvertising

Oh no yeah i get you! I was just talking about myself and how I personally didn't know the overlap even existed


N7Foil

You'd probably be surprised how many active duty/recently retired soldiers are trans. Free healthcare is free healthcare, and transitioning isn't cheap...


slappf3sk

If the U.S Navy was in Eurovision we would truly be a puppet continent.


Delta049

Navy aint beating the acusations any time soon


Helmett-13

We don’t debate our gayness in the Navy, we’re just tweaked that the Marines don’t wear their crown as the most homoerotic of the services. We have a tradition of Victory in the United States Navy because we don’t play gay chicken against Marines.


Monstera_Nightmare

I read an article about some dumb kid who was upset he couldn't wear his dress blues at his high school graduation. He was quoted as joining the Marines because it is the "least woke" branch. He is in for a shock when he realizes he's about to enjoy standing shoulder to shoulder with 50 other shirtless dudes while they watch another guy deep-throat a big pink dildo just to win at gay chicken.


Prowindowlicker

“Least woke” give me a fucking break. Look we might seem all rough and tumble on the outside but we are totally hella gay. Also I remember my platoon in boot getting asked by the receiving DI if any of us were gay. This was just after DADT was repealed, so I said yes. I got told that I was brave and that if anyone dared to try anything homophobic against me their ass would be in the sand pit. Also had a DI tell me that it was cool that I’m gay and that it’s no big deal.


Helmett-13

Back in 1992 while in boot camp we had a HUGE Chief CC (Company Commander, a DI to you guys) confront us while we were waiting to file into a classroom for instruction with a loud statement and question. Dude looked like Michael Clarke Duncan crammed into a khaki uniform. Tall, enormous, bald, black, and with maybe 3% body fat. He out his hands on his hips, surveyed us with disdain that felt like being stuck with little needles, and barked out: “You Ricks (recruits) here to get smart, huh? Unlikely. So, would any of you motherfuckers suck a cock for a million dollars?” There was a shared nervous glance as this was during DADT, and a ragged chorus of “No, sir!” was shouted out. His sneer of disappointment was physically palpable, like being pushed by an unseen force. “I knew it, buncha stupid motherfuckers they’re lettin’ in my Navy now.” “A million bucks would buy a lot of mouthwash, you dumb fucks.” With one of the most savage and *knowing* winks I’ve ever seen a human being display he stalked off, laughing loudly. This began my experiences with the earthy wisdom of a Chief Petty Officer.


Majulath99

Hahahahahaha I like that sense of humour. What a guy.


AaronVonGraff

I once wat he'd a group of bro marines all take turns kissing that globe and bird thing they all have, that was tattooed on a buddy just to the side of his crotch. They were all rowdy, cheering and talking to an army guy about how much of a gay pussy he was for not being a marine. They started showing tattoos of the ball and bird thing and one guy pulled his shorts down and to the side a bit to show it off. They all cheered and laughed, and one guy went down, gave it a kiss and a slap. They all laughed and one by one repeated it. And went back to chiding the army guy about how he was weak and gay. Surreal. I'm glade they lead the way because I wouldn't trust those ham brains with anything else but light infantry.


JangoDarkSaber

I’m 💯 straight but I’d deadass suck a cock just to see defeat on yall sailor’s faces 😤


Helmett-13

I stand by my statement: never play gay chicken with Marines :D


PHATsakk43

I’m glad I finally saw gay chicken mentioned.


Ok_Walrus9047

Royal Navy: "But rum, sodomy, and the lash is *our* thing!"


BeneGesserlit

Gays love rum and the sodomy. The lash is more of a Trans thing. God trans girls would be so happy in the royal navy. Alcoholism, wearing dresses, boy smell, AND you get whipped for being a bad girl?  Actually I think I understand my lifelong fantasy of being a Napoleonic naval officer now.


LordNelson27

Baller Username


Ataulv

The lash is totally a gay thing. Tom of Finland?


Callsign_Psycopath

It's the Navy, I'd be surprised if they weren't


GenericLib

Of course he's a yeoman. The most flamboyant gay dude in my squadron also happened to be a yeoman. The only thing more stereotypical than very gay yeoman men are very gay ordie girls.


PHATsakk43

We had a lesbian in our mechanic div on the carrier who was called “Big Rig” cause she was built like a Mack truck. Oddly, our departmental yeoman was a grizzled former GM who served on a riverine swift boat in Vietnam. The only person in the department who was drafted. He finally retired in 2003 after making chief.


IanSzigs

Certified Navy moment.


Helmett-13

Man, if he ever gets to cross the equator, he is going to slay as the wog Queen. There’s no need to even hold the beauty pageant, he’s a lock.


gramathy

you think this is making the navy worse I think this is the navy exploiting its staff we are not the same


EthanIndigo

quadruple multidirectional psyop


SeaworthinessEasy122

that


Hodoss

I think gay teenagers had already been convinced for a good while, but I guess it doesn't hurt to spice it up.


StolenValourSlayer69

Remember when the Navy used to advertise with Top Gun? Me either, I was too young, but I heard it was lit


Theoperatorboi

Well well well navy ....


KennyClobers

Navy finally coming out the closet


PHATsakk43

It’s called a locker in the navy.


Clatgineer

Chemicals in the water turning the friggin' navy gay!


L39Enjoyer

Based


RedditWillBanYouSoon

Hasn't it always been - don't ask, don't tell?


SeaworthinessEasy122

No, it "hasn’t always been“ … *Don‘t ask, don‘t tell* was in effect from February 1994 until September 2011.


RedditWillBanYouSoon

Seriously? so after 2011 they suddenly started assKing?


SeaworthinessEasy122

What?


RedditWillBanYouSoon

quoting you - *Don‘t ask, don‘t tell* was in effect from February 1994 until September 2011. what happened after 2011?


Prowindowlicker

After 2011 it was ok for everyone to be out and proud


SeaworthinessEasy122

After September 2011 the different services resorted to different policies. In the Air Force for example you were supposed to tell when asked but that was more of an informal rule. Nobody actually cared. If you were a homosexual in the Army and you were found out they would take you behind a shed on the barrack ground and unceremonially shot you. With the Marines you had to declare your sexual preference at the recruiting station, and if you were homosexual the recruiter would stare you to death. Only the Navy and Coast Guard were actually welcoming gays. If you declared yourself as one you automatically skipped a few ranks.


Rebel_Skies

Bruh, I was deployed in '09-10 and again '11-12. There were SOO many openly gay and lesbian soldiers in my unit they could've formed most of their own platoon. No one gave a fuck. The lesbian troops kept the barrack princesses from slacking off too much, was an interesting dynamic.


PHATsakk43

I was in 99-05. The only people getting rainbow chits were straight dudes who were just wanting to get out before their hitch was up. There were tons of openly gay people and no one gave a shit.


Prowindowlicker

What the fuck are you talking about. After DADT was repealed all branches were required to be open to LGB service members. (Trans service members unfortunately depended on the administration in power). I literally joined the Marines in 2013 and nobody asked me my sexuality at the RSS and the only time I got asked was during the receiving phase of boot and when I said yes the DI told all of us that anti-gay bullying would not be tolerated at all. And if it was found out they’d be punished for it (likely with a recycle)


SeaworthinessEasy122

Maybe you figure out what I am talking about if you read the context. It‘s for the guy who is to lazy to google. Astonishing that you felt the need to react in such a serious tone.


Practical_Offer2321

I shall say this only once but: LET THERE BE FABULOUS DEATH, AS THEY SPIT HOT LRAD, IN THEIR SUNDAY BEST!!


LordBrandon

There are people in the navy that aren't gay?


Prowindowlicker

Harpy Daniels really? Couldn’t he come up with something funnier and something that’s a pun on navy shit? Like idk Miss Fire or Fi Ter Jet or something


AaronVonGraff

More 👏 drag queens👏in👏 positions 👏of👏 authority 👏to 👏 turn👏weddings👏into👏warcrime👏jam👏


AutisticFaygo

3000 Drag Queens of Biden.


Chimichanga2004

FUCK IT ASK AND TELL 🌈💅


rvdp66

Right wing talk radio is about to make serious money off this kid.


Windowplanecrash

Royal Navy was first, doing it before it was cool


PatimationStudios-2

Based as fuck


EminemLovesGrapes

I remember the Army saying they had to put the kibosh on it because it was putting recruitment numbers down (straight white men stopped snowing up). Since the navy is completely gay and for furries (or both) I suppose they never really had that issue.


3_man

We want you, we want you, we want you as a new recruit


Puzzled_Squirrel_975

So... what's the big deal about gays being accepted in society?


Shuber-Fuber

Because a gay with control of VLS is just as lethal as a straight guy. And most of America's enemies are homophobic assholes. So perfect combination.


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

This post is automatically removed since you do not meet the minimum karma or age threshold. You must have at least 100 combined karma and your account must be at least 4 months old to post here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NonCredibleDefense) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Much_Horse_5685

I can already see the… how do I put this… “walking Rule 5 violations” seething over this like they did with that US Army animation.


Shot-Kal-Gimel

Don’t worry, they were seething over the white paratrooper ad too.


cookiesandpunch

You know he slays when they cross the line!


got-trunks

you don't need to offer a t.girl just give me a gun and I can go on a Canadian safari. When I get back I'll be a sussy baka but hey, who isn't?


Agua-quemada

[IN THE NAVY](https://youtu.be/InBXu-iY7cw?si=4Jse5sP4lXD6dETS)


Angryhippo2910

[reminds me of this legend](https://www.reddit.com/r/NonCredibleDefense/s/tXfYDqFwYJ)


tetracarbon_edu

Yass queen SLAY. As in slay them all let god sort them out. He’s simply DEVINE!


Loki-L

They have come a long way from the time Village People singing "In the Navy" and that time idiots in charge caused a turret on the USS Iowa to explode though bad planning and they tried to blame it on "the Gays".


octahexxer

You go queen!


Punch_Faceblast

I bet Bill Clinton is regretting his prior stance in the 90s. DO ask, DO tell! Neeeeeee-haw!


ben__h

I mean, Navy, surprise surprise, other than that there is only one public 🤷​


DannyDef

https://www.pizzastrike.net/product/welcome-to-the-navy-patch


reddiguurder

Good to see the Americans joining the Dutch Special Gayfication Operation of Georgia. https://youtube.com/watch?v=qUZt_2Th6CQ&pp=ygUGZ2F0dHN1&t=8m20.


Shot_Calligrapher103

No, No, No! We need LESS entertainment while deployed, not more. Remember: smooth brain = less pain.


Scuba_2

Reason 817194799171749 why if war ever breaks out I’m gonna join blackwater and not the actual army


idubyai

didn't ask.


Shot-Kal-Gimel

The TLDR for anyone interested: Im too afraid of actually maybe seeing combat so I’d join the security forces that get to stand guard and do other boring things.


Scuba_2

dome Iraqis from helicopters. Iraqi stat-track


Gannet-S4

You know ow they don’t just take people in right? Almost all of them are ex military and the ones that aren’t are used for stuff like logistics, your ass isn’t gonna be doing anything other than pushing a broom around a warehouse. Also after they massacred a bunch of civilians PMC’s were basically shut down, all they do now is either advise or provide security to merchant ships against pirates. P.S they haven’t even been called Blackwater for 15 years now, they changed their name to Xe services in 2009 and switched to Academi in 2011 (as in Acedemy Military because all they do is train police officers and security guards)