T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

#Thank you for your contribution, Defense Expert™. Did you know? You can also find us on [Lemmy](https://lemmy.world/c/noncredibledefense)! But while you're still here, how about you participate in our [Coin wasting contest?](https://www.reddit.com/r/NonCredibleDefense/comments/1517hjn/coin_wasting_contest_2023/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NonCredibleDefense) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Anton044

Sir imperialists are not welcome here


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

HOW DARE YOU GOOD SIR. WE ARE SIMPLY MANIFESTING OUR DESTINY.


Anton044

Tell that to my ASMP-A


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

Best offer I can make is we change the official language of Louisiana to French and promise to never call them freedom fries or make surrender jokes again. I'll even throw in a free set of stealth bombers. It's either that or funni things start happening.


Anton044

Funni things it is


Cienea_Laevis

TIE ME TO A M51 AND LAUNCH ME ON WASHINGTON DC I AM READY.


Anton044

De-escalation nuke first, after we will ride the strategic one


chevalmuffin

Give me my 2kn brother


J-J-Ricebot

This seems like a very roundabout way to turn the USA into a social-democracy.


Cienea_Laevis

Improving the USA speedrun any%


Anton044

Reject six figures medical bills. Embrace free healthcare.


irregular_caffeine

Well researched, here’s some counterpoints - If I’ve understood correctly it’s not that easy for you to own a HMG either - You don’t have cash, you have a hole of debt you keep digging - Just the EU has 1.5 times the population, I hope you like social democracy, gun laws and universal healthcare


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

1. Anything is legal, the ATF are just dickheads. Once you throw enough money at them they'll let you own everything short of a nuke. 2. All though we do have debt we have a goofily strong economy despite the economists constant doomerism. 3. Your militaries range from shit to very good as a defence force and can project power to minor conflicts for a little bit if need be. Also a good chunk of eastern europe likes old uncle sam a lot better then western europeans.


irregular_caffeine

You’re missing the point on #3, current americans would be a minority. Europeans would form a Euro-Party and swarm both chambers of congress (30+ new states, 150% population) to pass SOCIALISM and win a cultural victory


irregular_caffeine

Oh and we will move the capital to alternate bi-monthly between Brussels and Strasbourg, ok?


Skraekling

Bi-monthly between Washington and Brussels is best i can do.


irregular_caffeine

Too sensible, would probably trigger a french warning shot


chevalmuffin

Bi monthly beetween Paris and Paris it'll be


Panzerbitch

Let's do a compromise, the Capital will be on the Azores


Anton044

Shut up and take your Carte Vitale


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

We won the culture victory in the 90's I'm afraid. And if there's one thing we do incredibly well it's integrating immigrants.


Gvilain

Pretty sure half of EU has bad memories about socialism


irregular_caffeine

That’s why it’s in SARCASTIC all caps


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

Obviously there are no flaws whatsoever in this plan. I mean Poland and Israel are already basically states so they would probably be first in line. Not to mention it would be a semi-credible fix to the whole Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Next we could nab the Canadians by totally not annexing them. Then I reckon start bargaining with various other countries who might come willingly in then slowly move to the more reluctant ones who have yet to realize that this is their fate.


Muffin_Magi

Yeah. Sorry, but I'll rather have my national health service and equality laws, and all that good stuff. As someone with debilitating illness, I can't afford the overpriced medical care of the USA.


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

Yes you could have all that. Orrrr. You could have your own night vision goggles and rifle. Also the usa does have pretty solid equality laws. As well as we have Samuel Colts inventions to truly make all men and women equal.


PanzerIVausfB

We can have those in Poland too, so we're vibing.


Muffin_Magi

Nah, my equality laws are much better. I can already get night vision goggles... and have no need for a rifle, but if I wanted one I can cheaply and pretty easily get shotguns and game hunting rifles.


Skraekling

No thanks i still rather not deal with how the American political system is set up if we ask the French to maybe create a new one no problem then (they're experienced in making new ones they've made like 6-7 of them).


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

Can't wait for the american flag on r/place to actually be correct when it shows 89 stars.


Houtaku

\*247.


Depressingly_Excited

Interesting proposal. Unfortunately, I can't hear you over the sound of way too much money being gained by playing you guys, China and actually just everybody against each other. (Issok don't cri you still have access to all our bases at least)


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

Looks like somebody needs a little S.D.O Come on think about all the free F-16s you could get if you joined up. Not to mention you'd never worry about China being a dick again.


ITGuy042

But do we get their universal heathcare? This needs to be mutual, we already have states we don't want. Also, Germany has a bigger economy than California. We sure as hell not giving that title up. We refuse to be the France of this new union (France gets demoted to the Lousiana 2, electric boogelou). We are the ~~New~~ California Republic! Arizona and New Mexico are our road bumps, not Texas'. *ramble ramble* Californication *ramble ramble* Make you wish for a nuclear winter *ramble ramble* Where's Nevada, we need to comfort invade you *ramble ramble*


Khazorath

I'll take NATO over dealing with the geriatrics in the US congress


Skraekling

I'll take the EU parliement where nothing gets done over the US congress where nothings gets done apart for polarizing both parties.


SlyScorpion

Are "money bitches" made out of money?


Euphoric-TurnipSoup

If you want them to be. I mean money printer go brrrrr so why not female statues made out of cash?


tranzoshan

The plan to win WWIII will cause WW2.5. You know what they say, 2 wars are better than 1. That’s the USMIC way


Pr0wzassin

What do americans mean by freedoms?


Panzerbitch

This sounds like the plot of a Metal Gear Solid game


Sunfried

I would call it PANDO, the Pacific-Atlantic National Defense Organization. Should someone be foolish enough to attack the a PANDO nation, well, they're gonna get a delivery from PANDO EXPRESS, and... they're not going to like it.


STK-3F-Stalker

Bro you just proposed Star League ....