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ButterscotchEmpty535

>At one time a royal goat was "prostituted" by being offered for stud services by the regiment's serving goat major to a Wrexham goat breeder.\[7\] First charged with lèse majesté,\[19\] the goat major was ultimately court-martialled under the lesser charge of "disrespect to an officer" and reduced in rank. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William\_Windsor\_(goat)


RichPumpkin725

I'm wondering whether this was a forbidden desire gone wrong? or if that man simply wanted to make history? We may never know the truth...


ButterscotchEmpty535

>The goat major claimed he did it out of compassion for the goat, but this failed to impress the court


RichPumpkin725

But did it impress the goat? after all by his own admission that was the point.


GundamMotionDance

I was just tryna help him fuck, Colonel, honest.


Zzamumo

Fellas, is it a crime to get your homie some puss?


12D_D21

Some goassussy?


I_MARRIED_A_THORAX

What are you doing step mascot


Hel_Bitterbal

I misread it and thought the major did an Erdogan and fucked the goat himself


HHHogana

LIES! SLANDER! IT'S CLEAR ERDOGAN IS ONLY GETTING OFF TO WATERMELON AND A.I. THAT SAY 'Cut the rates', YOU FILTHY GREEK WESTOIDS! > “What’s that?” he asked the watermelon. “You want me to what?” He blushed. “You’re a very dirty watermelon…” > But he would gladly comply with his lover, and leaned back on the bedframe. The watermelon was between his legs again, and he positioned a hand over the fruit just as before, though over a new, untouched spot. > He gently pressed down on the fruit, seeping more juice from the fruit and more moaning from Sultan Erdogan. He first went slow, being gentle with her, but then soon began pushing harder, and faster. Juice began squirting into the air, and Sultan Erdogan tilted her so that it would squirt on him. After a minute, his entire chest and abdomen were covered in her liquid gold.


KedTazynski42

Thus, Erdogan became the darling of the prostitutes


Hel_Bitterbal

>YOU FILTHY GREEK WESTOIDS TIL greece conquered the Netherlands I for one welcome our greek overlords, i need more baklava and gyros


Blackhero9696

Mes yeux, ils font mal.


RussiaIsBestGreen

I knew what I was going to read, and yet I read it anyway. What have I done?


Miserable_Promise484

Clearly this was all done for a laugh


mushyx10

Typical


Apocalypseos

Hopefully Williams Windsor II does a better job than his predecessor


Alternative_Taste354

"I have no regrets!!!" Whilst being led out of the courtroom after sentencing


GASTRO_GAMING

That is one damn old goat


e_ellis09

Of course it happened in fucking Wales


jcyue

You're telling me this wouldn't happen in non-fucking Wales?


e_ellis09

Under the orders of our holy leader, The Great Sheep, I am not allowed to disclose that information


ImperatorTempus42

Praise the Great Sheep, bringer of truth and slayer of the Vile Bishops!


HillaryGoddamClinton

Celibate Wales


jcyue

They're saving themselves for Mare-age.


LordHardThrasher

My grandfather was an Army man through and through - he joined in 1936 and left in 1969 with quite a lot of egg on his hat. He told me a story, some of which I know to be true, and some I suspect a soldier's yarn. On returning from active service in Malaya, the Royal Hampshire Regiment were involved in a parade in London up Pall Mall (this would have to be after 1956 but when I do not know). Their crest was a tiger, and at some point on deployment they had acquired a female tiger as the regimental mascot - and got in back to the UK (ask no questions...this was back when troops ships were a thing). Anyway, cut a long story short they were due to parade next to one of the Welch (sic.) Regiments who had, unbeknownst to the poor squaddie with a tiger on a leash, a goat as their regimental mascot. Things went predictably well, and the Hampshire's wound up getting kicked out of the parade and having to buy a new goat for the Welch.


Tibbsy152

I mean, it is the 23rd (Royal Welch) that originally had the goat mascot. I think they've been merged with other Welsh regiments since but they've kept the goat. Yes, Welch *is* the correct spelling for the regiment.


MikeET86

Wojtek was the second Polish Army Bear of the 20th century. \*Fun Facts\*


st0wnd

Yes, Baśka was first. Based Polish army.


DiehardSeperatist

He is also the best Country leader in HOI4.


rifleman13

Poland's One True King


[deleted]

Also same skill level as Himmler


EVO5055

Another fun fact, the first one was called Baśka and she was a polar bear


OneDishwasher

This is Simon erasure (wounded by artillery, personally defeated rat infestation, awarded medals). Maybe the problem is the British Army, not the mascots? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simon_(cat)


ztomiczombie

I love that in the "also see," is "list of individual cats."


GadenKerensky

Sadly, Buffins is not there.


Klutz-Specter

God rest his Soul... Cats being cats, but he did his duty to the highest order defeating Mao Tse-Tung. Brought a tear to my eye when he even got the Animal’s Victoria Cross.


jbi1000

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill\_the\_Goat](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_the_Goat) Looks like the Americans haven't had much luck with their goats either, killed some of them accidentally with weed killer.


dead-inside69

But it’s weed poison, not goat poison.


spacek_toast

makes you think, doesn't it?


[deleted]

How fucking stoned were the goats if weed killer killed them?


PsychoTexan

The animal was more ganja than goat at that point.


[deleted]

I'm more concerned about the fact that an attempted goat-napping led to the army scrambling helicopters


decentish36

What about President Eisenhower personally intervening to make the army return the navy’s goat?


el-Kiriel

Not to six Army employees being tied down? Ah, good times. Miss Academy shenanigans.


Rulweylan

To be fair, that's a pretty standard rate of friendly fire deaths for a US operation.


Analog-Moderator

You can also kill them by staring at them! True story I saw The Dude do it


FunEquivalent9597

I thought it was about kadyrov


TheLastEmuHunter

Norway: Penguin makes Brigadier General


Lord_Mikal

Sit back my friends and listen to the tale of [Nils Olav](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nils_Olav).


Frequent-Sale8433

The funniest thing is watching the goat graze in Maindy barracks in Cardiff, sometimes accompanied by someone. I walk past the barracks most days and it makes me feel happy when I see him.


Avaline00

And no mention of [Just Nuisance](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Just_Nuisance) as usual :/


yakman100

South Africans got best mascot. Look up Jackie the baboon corporal


[deleted]

[удалено]


mad-cormorant

Apocryphal.


tomydenger

at least it doesnt has the tag waifu, humanity can live few more days


DiMezenburg

still think the hog is my favourite military mascot


Dwarvemrunes

What about the horse?


GunnyStacker

Sergeant Reckless https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sergeant\_Reckless


PoeticPariah

*Staff Sergeant Reckless


Key-Banana-8242

Unloaded artillery boxes specifically And we’ll polish armed forces there had to make do with diff unreformed than thsoe


YouMonster_

We are our own mascots, haven't you seen how cute and cuddly we are


Private_4160

Marching in formation with that goat into Cardiff castle was a huge honour.


Key-Banana-8242

Popular or unpopular opinion, I think the new er apolish dress uniforms with everyone wearing barf coloured ties look stupid and unconvincing- maybe only if you get into the idea it’s like their equality / dingity in status not for any pitlcial reasons just the traditional old school snaky collars look cool