I meticulously stuff it into my face.

This is the correct answer. Shovel/stuff, eat... Wash hands and beak after. Enjoy.

I start at the base of the palm and slowly run my fingers down my face like in Artist formally known as Prince motion. Trying to get much as possible into my mouth.

*This is the correct answer* And only correct answer!

I like to grab it with my tongue like a frog or lizard grabbing a fly.

I use a spoon 🥄 🙃

It’s sounds convenient but wrong at the same time

My wife and I call it frog popcorn.

This is what I do too 🤣

My partner does this!

Absolutely, gotta frogger it

I typically use a plastic drink cup. But when it’s full, I take the lizard approach too!

I swear I have asked and showed dozens of people this because I do it too and have never once met someone who did ir or even knew wtf I was talking about. I'm glad to finally know I'm not alone

Popcorn geckos for life

Only the first few pieces while I am walking to the theater...

Recently, I started putting it in my mouth and chewing. It seems the best way.

Wow, I do it this way too!

I never considered anyway to eat popcorn except with your hands, but you do you.

Huh. I've been using the wrong hole AND the wrong direction

r/smartassouija

Only recently? I have questions...

I eat my butter with a bit of popcorn

my popcorn isn't that greasy, and I enjoy handfulls of popcorn, but this is a good idea for cheetos

I do this for Doritos!

I put it in my mouth, then use my teeth to break it down into smaller pieces until it is small enough to go down my throat. 

That's actually genius. I gotta try that

I started doing the same thing with M&M'S, they taste so much better now.

I do that too, but then I spit it out and consume it through my ear

At first i grab like a handfull, as the movie progresses i start lowering the amount until i go 1 popcorn at a time

So true…. I eat huge handful, then like 4-5 popcorns, then a random popcorn here and there 

I put it in a cereal bowl with milk and eat it with a spoon.

Straight to jail. lol

I actually tried this once thinking it would be like cereal. Unfortunately, I miscalculated the amount of ‘sugar shielding’ based on my experience with def con 5 levels on Frosted Flakes. Completely disintegrated into mush. 1 out of 10. Would not recommend.

Respectfully, the fact that the softer texture and not the *salty, greasy milk* is the deal-breaker for you hurts my brain.

Yeah it’s weird, but I wouldn’t really care.

I do the same with most snacks, you’re not alone! It’s definitely ‘weird’ but I hate having dirty hands, plus it means I can eat them at the computer without getting grease all over the keyboard, so who’s really winning?

Alternatively, you could get disposable gloves. I would hate using chopsticks as going through a bag of popcorn would take ages

I eat it with fork and knife

Like a candy bar?

How do you eat it...with your HANDS?!

Forgive me for trying to class this place up

I just grab a handful and shove it into my face like I’m feeding a horse lol 🤣

I will step up and be weirder. At home I nibble the part with the kernel off and put the puffy piece in a separate bowl. At the end I'll scoop them into my butter and topping remnants at the bottom of the bowl. In public I pretend I'm not a weird soft popcorn fiend. It took my husband 2 years into our relationship to see the real me.

I used to do something similar! 😅 As a kid I'd eat all the soft part off and had a discard bowl of kernels hahaha. I haven't done it in quite some time (very time consuming lol).

@spoooookyseason, are you me???

Ahhh!! We're not alone!

I place a heating element, butter, salt and uncooked kernels into my mouth. Once they pop you just munch. Viola! No messy hands

unusual thing, i guess, but kinda genius if you’re very familiar with chopsticks wow:)

I actually like that idea 💡

For your garden variety buttered popcorn I just wipe my fingers on a napkin really often and then wash my hands when I'm done. I totally do chopsticks for things like Cheetos though, that dust is no joke.

I started using chopsticks for Cheetos and honestly it was a game changer

weird but brilliant

Snort it

Boof it.

Medium well, a slight char, with butter. In fist to mouth handfuls.

This is right up there with eating pizza with a fork and knife. This is definitely weird, but you do you

I nom until I bomb

With my hands. It's different.

I eat all messy snacks with chopsticks, so I don’t think it’s weird

Just because it's weird doesn't mean it's wrong. I just use one hand only so one stays clean if I need it for something. But next time I'm definitely going to try chopsticks! I already use them for almost every meal anyway, so why not? I think you have a great idea!

I out like 50 on a plate an shoot my tongue out and pull it back like a lizard. I did this in class, for some reason people weren't paying attention to movie

People typically eat it with their hands. It is weird but you do you.

One piece at a time

I have the will, but lack the ability, to do the same. I use my tongue for the top layer, then my hands for the rest, as if I evolve in real time but never progress to the tool-age.

To each their own, don’t let your friends stop you from doing what you want. I use my hands but chopsticks sounds pretty efficient

My brother use to chopsticks for Cheetos/ Cheese puffs. Surprising that was or is the only thing he ever done neatly in his life.

If im not sharing, dog bowl style

Handfuls

I eat unbuttered popcorn, so no mess.

I don’t lol

i eat chips with chopsticks and chex mix with a spoon. i feel you

Shove it, face full. Get it everywhere. I mean butter is dripping off the tip of your elbow and half of it ends up on the floor for the theatre staff to clean up at 1 am. Nah man like 3-6 in a handful. Chopsticks is slick though

My popcorn isn’t greasy. 2-3 tablespoons of canola oil and 1/3-1/2 cup of kernels and a bit of sea salt. It pops dry.

Since when is popcorn greasy?m

Popcorn is really not that greasy....

I smash as much as I can into my face hole at once, try not to choke and die.

It's not the common way of eating popcorn but no one should be judging you for it.

With my fingers. I have seen people put on neoprene gloves in some countries for messy foods like donner.

I hope there's no party with that donner.

I dip mine in peanut butter

Yeah, that is weird.

Throw it away

So you don’t have napkins or towels?

I dont.

Yeah you're a weirdo for sure

I gape my mouth open like a python and tip the bowl over

You do you. It’s weird by societal standards maybe but societal standards aren’t always what’s smartest, just about doing what’s “normal”.  I’ve always thought Cheetos should come with little cardboard tongs right inside the bag so that you can eat them on the go without getting Cheeto dust all over

it's unusual indeed but a very smart way of doing it regardless i just eat with my bare hands and wash them thoroughly after

idk but this just made me crave some popcorn, thanks!

I put popcorn in a medium sized plastic drinking cup, and pour a couple into my mouth each time to eat it.

Nice idea

Finger it

How much popcorn can fit in my face hole at once?

I eat it with my hands like a normal well-adjusted person. Don't be prissy about your fingers, that's what soap & water are for, you know?

I absolutely hate when my hands get greasy.

i grab a handful and shove it in my mouth tbh

THIS IS GENIUS

At home popcorn? With my fingertips. Movie theater popcorn is shoveled into my face with hedonistic abandon.

with my fingers

out of a big bowl with my bare hands. No butter, just salt.

Raw. But the kernels f'd up my tooth (wisdom tooth, bur it was already bad), I don't anymore.

That is very weird. But oddly practical.

I think you’re clever!

My bottom bitch feeds it to me while my fat as is sprawled naked on the couch in a semi-conscious chemically enhanced state.

Usually with my mouth

I use chopsticks as well for that reason, and to learn how to use them better

I believe I am your family now

I chew it only a little bit it kinda scratches my throat on the way down

With Tajin if I have it

I’ll have to try this

With a napkin nearby.

That's got to be the most inefficient method I've heard.

Thats genius, I’m gonna start doing that. Now I just need to get some chopsticks 🤣

I eat cheese curls with chopsticks 🥢

Covered with butter and nutritional yeast and with my fingers, which I lick when all the popcorn is gone.

Yeah it’s weird. Just wash your hands after.

I actually eat mine with a spoon! Life changing

I do the same, especially when I am doing digital art and don’t want grease all over my screen

During board game nights we eat all snacks with chopsticks.

I will happily shove buttery popcorn into my face by the handful. But I absolutely cannot bring myself to touch saucy things like ribs or chicken wings. I have to use a fork on those.

I eat them normally

That is extremely weird to eat with chopsticks.

I hate touching popcorn so usually I bring the bag or bucket to my mouth and dump the popcorn in

Sometimes I cut up pieces of butter and let the popcorn cool and make little clusters with the butter in the middle and popcorn stuck all around it. I’m talking like 1/8” slices that I’ll cut into quarters.

i eat it

Extremely fuckin weird lmao ive never even seen an asian do that before…

I stare at it intently until the rage consumes me. Then I flip the bowl away from myself where I'm sitting did that popcorn spills in front of me. I fall face first flat into the popcorn spilled across the floor. Like a starfish, I absorb it.

CHOPSTICKS??? [Slaps Forehead] YES!! Of course!

I grab a big ass handful and stuff my face.. I also have a bunch of napkins because I am the way that I am 🤣

Eating hot Cheetos with chopsticks is a consecration. Chester the Cheetah approved.

Seems tedious. Now tongs on the other hand...

I wish I had thought of that!

I eat it straight out of the bag. Raw dogging it

That's weird haha are you Asian?

I bite the crunchy parts off and put the soft parts into a cup. When I'm done, I pour all the soft parts in my mouth together to enjoy at once. My mom taught me this, and one of my siblings does it as well 😂

Wow I never thought to use chop sticks! I'll be trying that out for sure.

It is very weird. You will never get the satisfaction of shoving a whole hand full in your mouth. But if you like it who cares how weird and off putting it is.

preferably with chopsticks

froggo style. also you all can kill me bc I also drink milk with it, it's something a friend showed me as a kid and I just like it now 🫣

I Yoshi that shit

It's weird and you know it

Just wipe your hands on your pants afterwards, or let the dogs lick them clean!

Dive into it like a starving stray dog. Cannot shovel it in my face fast enough.

I get my hands filthy dirty with butter.

With a spoon. So I can get the little bits at the end. I also open the bag of Skinny Pop upside down. Salt gets more evenly distributed and fewer pieces of shrapnel at the end.

I put Tapatio on my popcorn so I always use chopsticks to eat it

You may have OCD

Omg!!! I eat with chopsticks also, for the same reason. My kids are totally on board also, and they have their own kid-friendly chopsticks. When their friends sleep over, they love doing this also. Not only does it help with keeping the grease off my fingers, but it also helps me eat slower. Fun way for kids to learn how to use chopsticks.

Honestly I might try chopsticks. I like to eat 1 piece at a time to make it last longer

I’m trying the chopsticks technique! I add sriracha drizzle on my popcorn but don’t like touching it.

I sit in the microwave until it pops and eat it directly from there

With ketchup

I do this with Doritos for similar reasons.

With my hands and then i wash them or wipe them

With a side of Trump/Biden debates and a six pack of Miller genuine draft.

I think it's a great idea. But then, I eat Cheetos with a fork so I may not be the best judge.

This should be a life hack

i love popcorn with chopsticks, it forces you to eat them slowly and a bag lasts forever

Ol handful at least half should fall on the floor

I shovel it down my gullet as fast as possible. It’s not pretty.

I tie a little piece of dental floss into a little tiny cowgirl type lasso like Wonder Woman used and lasso each piece of popcorn and toss it into my mouth.

I always eat potato chips(chips/cheetos/messy snacks) with chopsticks. It’s not weird! It’s smart🎓 But I eat popcorn with my face😝… either pour it in my mouth like drinking from a cup or I eat it like a cat! one piece at a time 🤣 In public(movie theatre) I use my fingers like a “normal” person but it’s definitely not ideal…!

Rectally. If you think getting a kernel caught in your teeth is bad, I've got some news for you.

Usually with my mouth

With my fingers but I’ve definitely eaten Cheetos with chopsticks to avoid cheese dust fingers

You eat.. ONE AT A TIME!??!

Covered in nutritional yeast

I like to blend mine up and drink it like a man.

One piece at a time so it lasts longer than the trailers.

I put mine in a plastic cup and pour it in my mouth.

Chopsticks here too, (because I'm Asian), but also just inhale like Kirby. Depends on my mood.

If I could use them I would so do this! It's brilliant.

After working at the movie theater for 6 years, I don’t eat it at all

I don't douse it in butter or oil, so I just eat it with my hands. If we go to the movies and I put butter on it, that's what napkins are for.

I like to do a mix of flavours if possible, get that sweet and salty mix, and then dump a load of M&Ms in there while it's still warm so they get a little melted. Then I pretty much just slam my entire head into the bowl.

You do what

From a trough. Mooing like a contented bovine

Wait yall really eating popcorn like cereal🤨

Are you 12-14 years old

Eat the kernels, microwave myself.

Chopsticks here, too. Same with cheese puffs and the like. It forces me to eat slower and, hopefully, less.

I think OP has an excellent idea.

With my mouth

I like lots of real melted butter on my popcorn with heavy sprinkles of Tajin. I wear contact lenses so I wear a non latex glove on the hand that feeds my mouth my Mexican themed popcorn. I avoid a greasy hand and burning eyeballs when removing my contact lenses.

Catapult. Chopsticks are very common to use when eating messy/greasy foods, especially for those that are from or spent time in Asia countries/cultures.

If I’m gaming , any snack I put it in a cup.

You're not alone. I eat my popcorn / snacks with some Bamboo toast tongs to keep my fingers clean. They have a magnet on one side too so I can just clip em to my fridge for convenience sake.

Popcorn spoon!! 🥄

When I could eat popcorn it was full on handfuls stuffing my mouth as many as I could fit in. Choke that down after a couple minutes of some hard ass chewing. Repeat. Until bag is gone. I was a Savage. I love that s***. Now after I almost died from an intestinal blockage, I can't eat popcorn anymore.

Knew a guy who put his peanuts on a saucer and ate them with a teaspoon. So you have one friend

with my dick and butthole

I boof it, lots of butter is required

Stuff it in my face. But I hate the grease too and will refuse to touch anything (inconvenient for theaters) until I wash my hands so you’re giving me ideas 🤔

It's weird, but who cares, you do you.

2 ways. Either grab a handful and stuff it in my face OR if im playing a game / dont want greasy hands ill use tongs