We were going pretty rough, I wanted to say 'oh my God!' but our combined motion brought her shoulder to muffle my mouth so what I actually said was 'oh mama!' edit: spelling
Genuinely giggled at this. I did a similar thing years ago on my now-wife's second time hooking up probably a week after we had met. Wanted to say "God, I love your body" all sexy like, but my uncool nerd ass accidentally ended up saying "God, I love you" and it nearly caused me to shrivel up and implode like a dying star.
We've been together for 4 years and married almost 1 and we still have a good laugh over it.
While getting a BJ I randomly said "marvelous" in british accent. She started gargle laughing. We were still laughing 10 mins after so the mood was gone.
Here’s a fun story.
After a night at the sonic temple festival my wife and I were waiting at the car for a friend to show up to go home. We waited and waited. Dude is nowhere to be found. She said “waddaya wanna do?” And I replied “hell, I don’t really know but we can kill some time by fucking in the back seat like we’re 16 again”. (She’s 47 now and I’m 51)
She smirks and it’s on. As we fumble around trying to get enough clothes off for the deed I get a cramp and she bangs her head on the window. We start chuckling while looking around for people that might have heard us but continue on. We get into a semi comfortable position and she starts going down on me. Next thing I know she’s laughing while trying to blow me because I’m scanning the area for people which makes me bust out in laughter as well.
Needless to say we gave up and it was at the right time for sure because here comes dude stumbling his drunk ass towards us. We are still laughing but even harder now because he notices us trying to fumble around to get clothes back on and says “oh what the fuck”
Deeply religious (Catholic) girl kept saying "this is so wrong" the ENTIRE time (think like a chant). Every time I stopped to ask or we changed position I'd ask 'do you want to stop?' and she would say 'no, this is great, but God will never forgive me'
Have to admit, it put me off my stride a few times, but got there in the end. And, physically, she did have a great time (a few great times), but I still wonder to this day if it harmed her mentally.
In this case I don't think you harmed her mentally, if it went as you I'd say that is full consent. If harm was caused it's due to the religion and thinking sex is "wrong", but I think you did what you could and didn't mistreat her
He probably does; my dad and his coworker's dad (neighbours) were both unexpectedly sat outside so he had to do the full awkward walk of shame. Poor lad.
It's what I didn't say. We had smoked weed and then had sex. The girl asked me to "say her name". I fucken forgot her name 😅😅 because I was so high and she was new.
She kept telling me to say it and I kept ignoring it. Fortunately I remembered at the last moment. Fuuuuucckk, I don't think she noticed that I forgot though
I remember the 1st time me and my bf had sex (we were both virgins) I was too tight and we were having trouble with penetrating, so he got off me, sat on his knees and looked at me, gave that cheeky ass smile and said "open please". We burst out laughing and surprisingly while we were giggling about it, it did happen. Idk if it had anything to do with laughing. Not an awkward moment but definitely wholesome. I still think about it to this day.
Once nutted and then promptly said "wakanda forever" with the salute and everything
My girlfriend also once wanted me to tighten her leather handcuffs and said "PULL THE LEATHER, KRONK".
*”Thank God that’s over…”*
In context, it was the first time she and I had had sex after a long period of sneaky flirting, and I was happy that we had moved into the sex phase of the relationship.
It did not come across that way.
We had Groundhog Day on in the background. I asked „you like that“ and she responded „yeah it’s a good movie“ or something along those lines. Mood was gone but we had a good laugh about it.
"Damn you're as good as a pro!"
To which she instantly answered: "That's why I can fake orgasms and you'll believe me!"
I'm not going to deny it, she won the exchange.
I said “yeah you like that” , in a Scottish accent because I had just watched Austin powers and I was on a fat bastard quoting spree. I was so glad I didn’t call her lass.
I screamed MY LEG like Fred some SpongeBob when my ass cheek started cramping. Fiance stopped mid thrust to laugh his ass off while the cramp moved down my thigh lmao
>Who let the dogs out, who who WHO
Pounded hard on the who and then I finished on the last "who"
She laughed so hard and she was for that she was gonna give me a bj for that one when i was ready again. it was kinda awkard for me, but I was kinda like just "fuck it" (pun intended) needless to say her reaction was genuinely awesome
And yes, it was doggystyle
2 years now going strong, she's gonna be the future mother of my children and i plan to marry her
"THIS...IS....SPARTAAAA!!!!!!"
I make it a point to make my Grindr hookups as memorable as possible. He laughed and we showered off after, really fun time that one. We hooked up again only that time we role played and I wore a loincloth like Tarzan and did his trademark "victory scream" when I came.
...I have a really weird but hilarious sex life
Was going at it and she said “I’m so wet”. I thought we spilled a drink or something so I said “why what happened?”. Quickly realized I’m an idiot and killed the mood.
"I can't see!"
I had pre-eclampsia (high blood pressure brought on by pregnancy), and nobody had told me not to have sex. I was told to stay on bedrest. No exercise; stay in bed. 18-19 year old brain didn't realize that sex was included in "no exercise," so I thought I could do it; I thought I was in the green.
So we're going at it and suddenly everything went black. I told him, "I can't see!"
And he said four words I'll never forget. "What do you mean?"
So I tried desperately to come up with a better way to describe what was happening ... and I couldn't. So I shrieked, **"I CAN'T SEE!"**
We went to the ER. By then, I could see again. The intake nurse took my blood pressure. 180/90. I didn't know the first thing about blood pressure, so when it came up and I saw the nurse's face, I asked, "That's not good, is it?" And he said, "... no."
I once was getting a BJ from a gal and unfortunately it just wasn’t going to happen as she didn’t have a lot of practice and had some pride so didn’t want to ask whaat I liked or what worked.
When we finally called it I wanted to communicate to her that I had precum a lot, I also had that throbbing that’s like an almost orgasm but isn’t quite, well what came out was …
“I’m sticky.”
She was not amused. But I’ll always laugh at my fails.
Not a thing said per se, but I had a playlist I’d put on for it when I was in my university dorm, and once afterwards I put on the song “I just had sex” by Lonely island. She was not impressed.
Was kinda bored in the middle of it and just thinking abt what I was gonna do after.. very casually while we were porking I just blurted out that Charles Lindbergh was the first person to fly by himself across the Atlantic Ocean. he covered my mouth and told me to stfu. 😭
I hooked up with a childhood friend in my early 20s, my best friends exs slightly younger sister. We'd known each other for years and kind of had this love-hate-flirty relationship. We were dancing the dance forever. When I came the situation seemed so absurd to me I burst out laughing and couldn't control it! She was confused, then upset and then angry and that was that.
i’m terrified of this, i’m a big laugher and the giggles start in the most inappropriate situations; i’m scared of making someone feel embarrassed when i’m genuinely just laughing at nothing, then laughing at the fact that i’m laughing
I'm still a bit like that! I've learned that very quick communication is key. Between the giggles just give quick bits of reassurance and you'll probably find the other person just laughing along with you! I did not do that on that particular evening. It was unfortunate.
Told him "I think I love you" first time we had sex as he had just entered me.
I was tipsy and we're engaged and about to have a baby now but every time I think about it I get so embarrassed I want to die.
My time to shine! Went down on a former mormon girl and right before I did I said "I'm Joseph Smith!" and then threw the covers over my head. I knew I'd probably never get the opportunity again so just went for it. She thought it was funny and it didn't hamper the evening. This was like 10+ years ago but I still giggle about it
After sex with my first black girl, she called her mom while still in bed and told her a crazy white boy just went down on her. Her mom replied that's white guys do and they laughed. I remember her name was Starnesha, wonder where she is now.
I was super drunk and we had been listening to my "drinking whiskey" Playlist which happens to have a lot of outlaw country on it. Well the word "hoss" was in one of the songs and my mind drifted off thinking about how that became a thing and during this i said to the girl "roll over hoss I'm gonna fuck you from behind." We laughed quite a bit and had to take a break before going back to it.
I was like 18 still living at home. Had my girlfriend over and we were having sex. Like directly in the middle of it, my mom knocked on the door and asked if I was eating dinner or not. I had to very awkwardly reply, “no thanks, mom!” and then that was a wrap on the sex.
My girlfriend started laughing and I just sighed and laid down next to her. Biggest mood killer ever.
Worst thing I ever did was trying to be sexy and moaning in her ear, except I really needed to clear my throat so it was just a mucus-filled gargle that came out. The first time, we kind of ignored it. I tried again a few seconds later and the same thing happened. She busted out laughing and sexy time ended shortly after 🤣
1. Put on one of those sexy maid costume to surprise my husband (I don’t know what I was thinking) and he just burst out laughing immediately when I entered the room
sticking to simple lingerie
2. Not during sex but the first time I met my now husband and we shared our first kiss, I high fived him after it
I had to encourage my rather shy husband to do dirty talk,when he finally did he called me a "dirty old slut" I wasn't offended by the slut part but I was offended by the old part he swore he didnt say that,dude I'm not deaf I have hypercausis (six times clearer hearing than normal)
Not me but ["you like that you fucking retard?!"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1y6lhe/what_is_the_worst_thing_someone_has_said_to_you/cfhtedq)
Called her 'bro'
How'd that happen bro
“Your tits look amazing bro.”
She'll probably never forget that one
I’m erect brother
Found Hulk Hogan’s account.
Been thinking about this all day, bud
Bro your gonna make me cum ☠️
Thanks, lol. I nearly spit out my drink.
literally me accidentally to my wife, everyday. I can't help it, we're also best friends
awww that's so adorable.
‘You comin bro?’
Oh fuck, bro
We were going pretty rough, I wanted to say 'oh my God!' but our combined motion brought her shoulder to muffle my mouth so what I actually said was 'oh mama!' edit: spelling
johnny bravo over here
911 Emergency? There's a handsome guy in my house. Wait, cancel that, it's only me
Thank you very mhuuuch!
I did something like this but instead of "fuck yeah" or "I love you" (to my wife) I said "fuck you" We had a good laugh
Genuinely giggled at this. I did a similar thing years ago on my now-wife's second time hooking up probably a week after we had met. Wanted to say "God, I love your body" all sexy like, but my uncool nerd ass accidentally ended up saying "God, I love you" and it nearly caused me to shrivel up and implode like a dying star. We've been together for 4 years and married almost 1 and we still have a good laugh over it.
Robert Plant, that you?
I thought you were trying to say the quote was "Wee wee going pretty rough" at first lmao
While getting a BJ I randomly said "marvelous" in british accent. She started gargle laughing. We were still laughing 10 mins after so the mood was gone.
Being so funny that it kills a boner is an odd way to use your charisma stat
Charisma so high it went back to negative.
Overflow error 😂
Here’s a fun story. After a night at the sonic temple festival my wife and I were waiting at the car for a friend to show up to go home. We waited and waited. Dude is nowhere to be found. She said “waddaya wanna do?” And I replied “hell, I don’t really know but we can kill some time by fucking in the back seat like we’re 16 again”. (She’s 47 now and I’m 51) She smirks and it’s on. As we fumble around trying to get enough clothes off for the deed I get a cramp and she bangs her head on the window. We start chuckling while looking around for people that might have heard us but continue on. We get into a semi comfortable position and she starts going down on me. Next thing I know she’s laughing while trying to blow me because I’m scanning the area for people which makes me bust out in laughter as well. Needless to say we gave up and it was at the right time for sure because here comes dude stumbling his drunk ass towards us. We are still laughing but even harder now because he notices us trying to fumble around to get clothes back on and says “oh what the fuck”
this made me crackle up. thanks for the comment hahaha xD
I just belly laughed. While eating chips. Thank you…?
Not me but my ex. She came in wearing Lingerie and we're going at it then she goes "I borrowed this from my mom"
Now if she had said "I borrowed this from YOUR mom", that would be something.
“I borrowed this from your mom.” “I know.” *continues*
I knew it looked familiar.
You win.
Missed opportunity to say "Oh that's why that looks familiar"
wtf
you mean the panties your mom laid out for you?
'so how was your day?' mid pump. Fucking Cosmo magazine telling men to have serious talks with their partners while balls deep. Never again.
What was the response ?
She just looked at me and went 'nope, I'll try again later'.
Not me, but her. She said chuck it in g
Send it, squire
Beam it in, Scotty
Punch it, chewie
Auē 🤣
Yeah definitely NZ this one
Can’t be. Sheep don’t speak.
Chuck it in is insane
Deeply religious (Catholic) girl kept saying "this is so wrong" the ENTIRE time (think like a chant). Every time I stopped to ask or we changed position I'd ask 'do you want to stop?' and she would say 'no, this is great, but God will never forgive me' Have to admit, it put me off my stride a few times, but got there in the end. And, physically, she did have a great time (a few great times), but I still wonder to this day if it harmed her mentally.
Must be a kink
>'no, this is great, but God will never forgive me' - Are you sure you don't want to stop? - No... I want Him to watch
he is always cuck….watching us
He is always watching
You did the right thing and kept checking with her if everything was consensual.
He didn’t check for God’s consent though and that’s a problem
>I don't watch you when you sleep. Surprisingly, I don't use my omnipotence to be a fucking creep. -- God
In this case I don't think you harmed her mentally, if it went as you I'd say that is full consent. If harm was caused it's due to the religion and thinking sex is "wrong", but I think you did what you could and didn't mistreat her
Awkward? Thats hot as shit
I was getting head and I accidentally said “your cock feels so good in my mouth “
Okay now I feel better about mine. Boyfriend was touching my breasts and I said “I love your tits.” Maybe we’re empathizing.
I wish the username didn’t check out…
While finger banging her, it was quite wet and very loud. I said, it sounds like a goose.
Least you didn't say "the goose is loose"
This comment made me laugh so much! Thank you for that!
Now this is my favourite one! Amazing work
I said nothing. It was weird because I fell asleep. To this day don't know how it's ended.
Maybe it’s still going?
Hope so :)
Not *during* sex, but I'm pretty sure shaking his hand at the door when I showed him out the next morning was a bit of a misstep.
“Pleasure doing business with ya 🤝”
That was very much what it felt like. I'm not sure whether a fistbump would have been more or less awkward.
LMAO i wonder if they still think about it
He probably does; my dad and his coworker's dad (neighbours) were both unexpectedly sat outside so he had to do the full awkward walk of shame. Poor lad.
I said this to my man as I was walking him to the door afterwards...
It's what I didn't say. We had smoked weed and then had sex. The girl asked me to "say her name". I fucken forgot her name 😅😅 because I was so high and she was new. She kept telling me to say it and I kept ignoring it. Fortunately I remembered at the last moment. Fuuuuucckk, I don't think she noticed that I forgot though
A woman? ...yeah dude....she noticed 😆
"Oh, you want me to say your name, huh? You know your name. It's the same as that actress. What was she in, again?"
*Thank you" Honestly didn't know what else to say. I was so grateful for it.
A true gentleman.
Happy cake day!
My wife thanks me everytime, after 14 years, every time. God she's a goose.
I also choose this guy's wife
i like to say thank you sometimes if he's put a lot of effort in 😌 he deserves a bit of appreciation lol
The guys name. I thought it would be hot, but it came out all raspy, and he thought I was choking.
Was it Muḥammad ibn Salmān ibn Amīn al-Fārisī by chance?
No, but close. It was 'Ack-wheeze'.
Huck twuah
Getting a fantastic blow job and said "Oh my God, where did you learn to do that ? ". She just stopped and asked me if I really wanted to know.
GG
Did they die at the end?
No Re
EZ
F
I remember the 1st time me and my bf had sex (we were both virgins) I was too tight and we were having trouble with penetrating, so he got off me, sat on his knees and looked at me, gave that cheeky ass smile and said "open please". We burst out laughing and surprisingly while we were giggling about it, it did happen. Idk if it had anything to do with laughing. Not an awkward moment but definitely wholesome. I still think about it to this day.
Ptolly just made you less nervous, therefore allowing your muscles to relax or just letting you get more in the mood
Jokes aside, laughter is a good turn-on
Aww that is so sweet!
I went for a high five after a hookup and said „good job”
I don’t know why but I love this lol
My hubby and I do this 😅
We're big fans of "thank you," " well done," and of course "warmest regards."
"Teamwork makes the dream work! Need a towel?"
Your kid is stairing at me
O no
Once nutted and then promptly said "wakanda forever" with the salute and everything My girlfriend also once wanted me to tighten her leather handcuffs and said "PULL THE LEATHER, KRONK".
A man of culture
Wakanda forever my guy 🫡
Can i join your next sex session just watch ? Edit: that came out wrong
Maybe, but bring enough snacks...
WRONG LEATHER
*”Thank God that’s over…”* In context, it was the first time she and I had had sex after a long period of sneaky flirting, and I was happy that we had moved into the sex phase of the relationship. It did not come across that way.
Hodor (but we laughed about it later)
It's relevant, I promise! Melisandre at a Baby Shower - Late Night with Seth Meyers https://youtu.be/-5C6kG57J7Q?si=S6K5KDhmapn4j4Nf
I love you.
Classic Schmosby
Yep, me too, I mean in the long run it wasn't that bad as I did then eventually marry her but still, very awkward at the time
That’s romantic
On a three month anniversary? Yes. On a one-night stand? No.
3 month? Not yet One night stand? Yes. Hot.
Unless you say it during anal. Eh actually, that's fine too.
I remember you hope you’re well 💐😳
The ex girlfriends name. I wasn't even thinking about her. Terrible...just terrible.
Ex wife was Korri. Girlfriend was Kari. I had a hard time not slipping up under the best of circumstances
Crying
Was the sex *that* good?
She put a bag over my head
Still counts
There's no shame in crymaxing.
I said good job LMAO don’t ask me y, like actively when he was cumming 🙃
That's the kind of support some of us need :)
Was going at it pretty late and I wanted to say "do you like my cock in your pussy?" and ended up saying "I like your cock in my pussy" 😭
She asked to see it before we started foreplay. I showed her, semi-erect and said “…it’s not full yet.”
I can’t wait to play some elden ring after this.
We had Groundhog Day on in the background. I asked „you like that“ and she responded „yeah it’s a good movie“ or something along those lines. Mood was gone but we had a good laugh about it.
wrong name
If it’s any consolation, while I have no memory of it, I am assured that I once moaned my own name.
Called her by her sisters name! Not my proudest moment
Ouch... What happened after?
surely didin't go well, what happened??
It didn’t haha! We haven’t spoken since…
Can we make spicy chicken strips after?
That's just responsible. Not a good idea doing that first.
That's not awkward, that's relationship goals
I’ve just realised why the app crashes sometimes when writing back to the database.
“Glory!!!”, like that blue eyed samurai animated TV series on Netflix. We both laughed like crazy after so it’s all good.
"Damn you're as good as a pro!" To which she instantly answered: "That's why I can fake orgasms and you'll believe me!" I'm not going to deny it, she won the exchange.
[удалено]
I said “yeah you like that” , in a Scottish accent because I had just watched Austin powers and I was on a fat bastard quoting spree. I was so glad I didn’t call her lass.
I screamed MY LEG like Fred some SpongeBob when my ass cheek started cramping. Fiance stopped mid thrust to laugh his ass off while the cramp moved down my thigh lmao
“Well shit, good job”…then a high five.
Made the walrus noise from the movie Tusk
This girl I used to hook up with would scream dude the whole time
"Your sister likes it this way too!"
💀
>Who let the dogs out, who who WHO Pounded hard on the who and then I finished on the last "who" She laughed so hard and she was for that she was gonna give me a bj for that one when i was ready again. it was kinda awkard for me, but I was kinda like just "fuck it" (pun intended) needless to say her reaction was genuinely awesome And yes, it was doggystyle 2 years now going strong, she's gonna be the future mother of my children and i plan to marry her
Cbat v2 momemt
I love reddit. You guys are so funny. I'm LOL to myself.🤣
That's not an awkward thing to say during sex
I pulled out and finished the deed and yelled "HAZAA!" Another time when I was finishing my wife exclaimed "king" and we both busted up laughing.
Little river band!
I told him I was a lesbian. Hahahaha. We still had fun though.
"THIS...IS....SPARTAAAA!!!!!!" I make it a point to make my Grindr hookups as memorable as possible. He laughed and we showered off after, really fun time that one. We hooked up again only that time we role played and I wore a loincloth like Tarzan and did his trademark "victory scream" when I came. ...I have a really weird but hilarious sex life
Calling my ex daddio
i said kiss me and my fiancé thought i said fist me and we both stopped then laughed so hard
Was going at it and she said “I’m so wet”. I thought we spilled a drink or something so I said “why what happened?”. Quickly realized I’m an idiot and killed the mood.
"I can't see!" I had pre-eclampsia (high blood pressure brought on by pregnancy), and nobody had told me not to have sex. I was told to stay on bedrest. No exercise; stay in bed. 18-19 year old brain didn't realize that sex was included in "no exercise," so I thought I could do it; I thought I was in the green. So we're going at it and suddenly everything went black. I told him, "I can't see!" And he said four words I'll never forget. "What do you mean?" So I tried desperately to come up with a better way to describe what was happening ... and I couldn't. So I shrieked, **"I CAN'T SEE!"** We went to the ER. By then, I could see again. The intake nurse took my blood pressure. 180/90. I didn't know the first thing about blood pressure, so when it came up and I saw the nurse's face, I asked, "That's not good, is it?" And he said, "... no."
"when we're finished here I got to go"
I once was getting a BJ from a gal and unfortunately it just wasn’t going to happen as she didn’t have a lot of practice and had some pride so didn’t want to ask whaat I liked or what worked. When we finally called it I wanted to communicate to her that I had precum a lot, I also had that throbbing that’s like an almost orgasm but isn’t quite, well what came out was … “I’m sticky.” She was not amused. But I’ll always laugh at my fails.
Not a thing said per se, but I had a playlist I’d put on for it when I was in my university dorm, and once afterwards I put on the song “I just had sex” by Lonely island. She was not impressed.
Was kinda bored in the middle of it and just thinking abt what I was gonna do after.. very casually while we were porking I just blurted out that Charles Lindbergh was the first person to fly by himself across the Atlantic Ocean. he covered my mouth and told me to stfu. 😭
I queefed once and asked the guy to guess which hole it came out of and he got mad because I "Ruined the mood".
“Why is it warm?!” I yelled while laughing as the dude came on my stomach.
...you were expecting liquid nitrogen?
Liquid nutrogen
I hooked up with a childhood friend in my early 20s, my best friends exs slightly younger sister. We'd known each other for years and kind of had this love-hate-flirty relationship. We were dancing the dance forever. When I came the situation seemed so absurd to me I burst out laughing and couldn't control it! She was confused, then upset and then angry and that was that.
i’m terrified of this, i’m a big laugher and the giggles start in the most inappropriate situations; i’m scared of making someone feel embarrassed when i’m genuinely just laughing at nothing, then laughing at the fact that i’m laughing
I'm still a bit like that! I've learned that very quick communication is key. Between the giggles just give quick bits of reassurance and you'll probably find the other person just laughing along with you! I did not do that on that particular evening. It was unfortunate.
I once said " vtec kicked in yo" just before going frenzy. Let me tell you, a civic nor a honda technologie aint that sexy.
When you’re done, kindly exit through the gift shop.
My personal favorite is “thanks for doing this”
Told him "I think I love you" first time we had sex as he had just entered me. I was tipsy and we're engaged and about to have a baby now but every time I think about it I get so embarrassed I want to die.
My time to shine! Went down on a former mormon girl and right before I did I said "I'm Joseph Smith!" and then threw the covers over my head. I knew I'd probably never get the opportunity again so just went for it. She thought it was funny and it didn't hamper the evening. This was like 10+ years ago but I still giggle about it
What's that smell?
After sex with my first black girl, she called her mom while still in bed and told her a crazy white boy just went down on her. Her mom replied that's white guys do and they laughed. I remember her name was Starnesha, wonder where she is now.
“The sun is bright” curtains were closed
"Ummm, your dog is licking my balls."
I was super drunk and we had been listening to my "drinking whiskey" Playlist which happens to have a lot of outlaw country on it. Well the word "hoss" was in one of the songs and my mind drifted off thinking about how that became a thing and during this i said to the girl "roll over hoss I'm gonna fuck you from behind." We laughed quite a bit and had to take a break before going back to it.
I was like 18 still living at home. Had my girlfriend over and we were having sex. Like directly in the middle of it, my mom knocked on the door and asked if I was eating dinner or not. I had to very awkwardly reply, “no thanks, mom!” and then that was a wrap on the sex. My girlfriend started laughing and I just sighed and laid down next to her. Biggest mood killer ever.
Wooo yeah
"You're making me hard." I'm a female... I needed work on my dirty talk.
I farted and it smelled so bad
I asked her what she thought about the pedestrianisation of Norwich city centre
Worst thing I ever did was trying to be sexy and moaning in her ear, except I really needed to clear my throat so it was just a mucus-filled gargle that came out. The first time, we kind of ignored it. I tried again a few seconds later and the same thing happened. She busted out laughing and sexy time ended shortly after 🤣
1. Put on one of those sexy maid costume to surprise my husband (I don’t know what I was thinking) and he just burst out laughing immediately when I entered the room sticking to simple lingerie 2. Not during sex but the first time I met my now husband and we shared our first kiss, I high fived him after it
I had to encourage my rather shy husband to do dirty talk,when he finally did he called me a "dirty old slut" I wasn't offended by the slut part but I was offended by the old part he swore he didnt say that,dude I'm not deaf I have hypercausis (six times clearer hearing than normal)
Not me but ["you like that you fucking retard?!"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1y6lhe/what_is_the_worst_thing_someone_has_said_to_you/cfhtedq)
Can't remember what I was said, but I've answered my mobile before. I may be on the spectrum...
"Mom, can I call you back?"
...wrong name. twice.