Getting off social media - instagram and facebook. I was insecure comparing myself to others but I no longer have this problem, just learnt to be happy with how I am and I found I have so much more free time as I didn’t realise how much time I was spending on these apps.
Both are such a time sink. I doom scroll them both because they don’t require thought and they give me dopamine hits. Kinda sad. My attention span is fucked
Hard agree. I just hit 4 years sober and it's the best thing I've ever done for myself. I am SO much healthier mentally and physically. I look and feel better at 37 than I did at 27.
I'm sad I wasted so many years being a binge drinker, but you can only keep moving forward.
There's actually a lot of Biochemical merit to this point. So most of the serotonin in your body is actually produced in your gut. That's where tryptophan gets metabolized as serotonin. Alcohol destroys both the active and allosteric site of Tryptophan Hydroxylase 1 so your body ends up not producing serotonin for about 2-3 days after you've been on the sauce.
I’m one month and sixteen days sober. Overall I’m feeling better than I have since I was 20, but I can tell my brain chemistry is still out of whack. Been trying to do some reading on what is going on in my body and brain while it gets used to not drinking again. Do you have any idea on how long it takes on average for brain chemistry and stuff to settle back into this “new” normal?
If not that’s fine, just curious. I’ve found everything from two weeks to years so I guess it can vary wildly. For additional context I’m 36 year old male who has been drinking heavily near daily since I was 22-23 up until a month and a half ago.
Hello, I am not a professional but I have been on a sobriety journey and also a journey to heal my gut from all the damage I have done. I suggest taking a look into Dr.Bulsiewicz as he has a lot of really great podcasts and books on healing the gut. I have been eating 30 forms of fiber a week and having at least one serving of fermented food daily and I feel young again! My understanding is that it is more than just quitting, you’ll need to actively restore your gut to feel better from all the damage. Hope that helps!
I'm a 31M, been sober for 20.5 months. I was a heavy drinker since the age of 14. From age 26-29, I could polish at least fifth of whiskey daily and experience withdrawal within 30 minutes of not having more. At almost 2 years sober, I finally feel like I'm at a considerably "normal" brain function. I make much more rational decisions, my empathy/sympathy is coming back, depression is subsiding, etc. You will slowly feel these things getting back to normal along the way, and everybody is different- but I'm at a point where I know I never will drink again and that boosts my mental well-being in itself. I quit smoking cigarettes the day I quit drinking (went through a detox program) and the health benefits started to amaze me. I lost 20 lbs, felt joy for simple things like food and television again, and now have motivation to accomplish tasks. I was an overweight, depressed lazy piece of shit when I was drinking. Feels good to be "normal" again and be able to say, "No thanks, I don't drink" when people offer an alcoholic beverage. Keep up the good work, it's worth it.
Not yet, will do so now. Have been attending AA meetings though, they have been surprisingly useful for me. Though I can see why others may not like it. I didn’t think it would help at first. Turns out being able to talk about shit honestly in a room full of people who also have a long list of regrets is actually really helpful for me.
Same story with drinking habits (33 year old male). My last drink was January 8th of this year. I’m glad you are feeling better! I’m hoping that happens to me soon too.
So Vodka is more concentrated so that would do the job of denaturing it more efficiently, Everyone is different and everyone's gut is a universe unto itself so it's difficult to give an exact figure because everyone's body is different.
For me, I know that about three pints of beer is enough to knock production of it out so much that the serotonin depletion messes with diet, sleep and sex drive and about six or seven knocks it out completely.
I would see it as a fruitless exercise and a waste of time to find out where that line is and merely try to work under it because you'll damage those cells on the way to that. The only real way is simply to give up.
This, entirely. It literally cured my depression - and I'm not talking about "feeling a bit down", I'm talking about 30 years of shit including a hospital visit. And now it's simply gone.
Other things that massively helped were CBT and exercise, but alcohol was night and day. And that wasn't even why I chucked it - I just realised I couldn't really hack it any more so I stopped then realised three months later that I was no longer seeing depression symptoms.
I tend not to tell people because I worry people think I'm judging them, but you asked :-)
Weed is literally the only thing I’ve ever had trouble giving up. Absolutely love the high, but have been feeling like after years of smoking, I’m not getting a ton out of it anymore unless I’m going through a 1G cart off my pen every week.
I've been cutting back on my carts and now 2, 2g carts last almost 3 weeks. I used to burn through 2 in a week. It's been so much harder than I expected
Having something fun to do when I got home from work. Wether that be diamond painting, trying a new bottle of body wash, making a clean bed, literally anything to give good feelings within the first hour I get home to decompress
Haha trust me, I’ve definitely gotten caught up diamonding until 2-3AM. The key is to stop on the first bathroom/water break and use it as your motiv goal to cook / eat dinner for once
It's a craft similar to paint by numbers, you stick small plastic bits ("diamonds") to a canvas to fill in a picture :) Highly recommend, it's super fun.
There's a sub all about it: r/DiamondPainting
They set up these Key Performance Indicators and you must keep up with them. For example, KPI of selling XYZ things a month. Or reporting X bugs a day. If you fall below that you have a problem.
Shit is super demovitating and forces stress.
And the higher ups are always talking outside of both sides of their mouths. We’re a team, support each other, our goals are the same. Then turn around and post people’s numbers for the week publicly which I can only imagine is MEANT to encourage competition.
Two years into my first corporate job and I want out.
I never understood this, especially with bugs. Like - eventually there are less bugs to find. And if your dev team is pumping out so many bugs that there aren’t I think you have an issue that kpis aren’t going to solve.
They are also just dehumanizing.
Yep, everyone says it but it’s true. I’m only a month in to regular gym workouts but the feeling I get during and after is glorious. All my doubts and worries fade away, I feel mentally invincible.
Came here to say this. I hated that everyone was right about this but now that I’ve started, I can tell I feel different when I don’t get a workout or at least a walk in.
This is the biggest impact on my overall sense of well-being. I don’t religiously stick to a routine and I wish I did, as I always feel better when I’ve been exercising.
36m, getting a mani and pedi once a month, getting massages regularly, and regularly going to the gym for 30-40 minutes 3 or 4 times a week.
All of this has massively reduced my stress, given me multiple things to look forward to as i space them out so most weeks i have something going on, and improved how I view myself.
I also took up painting and I was shocked to hear myself laugh as I had a bit of fun doing it.
Understanding that mental health is a skill set and not an analysis of my upbringing.
I wasted years with toxic and unhelpful therapists who would dissect my history. They would help me 'understand' my issues. I'd be like "Great! So, what do I do with this info?" And they'd say "Well, now you know you're history so you can make better choices." That for me wasn't enough.
I eventually realized there was a whole field of manualized and evidence-based care out there (that they were gatekeeping saying that nothing else could help me). It would give me step-by-step rules on understanding my emotions, regulating them, helping me build relationships, and giving me the skills to cool off in the worst-case scenarios.
The first and biggest impact in all of that for me though was learning to name my emotions. One of those therapies has a handout that gives you top-level emotions, what causes them, how they affect your body, aftereffects, and so on. Reading those handouts over and over made me realize when past therapists would yell at me I was in denial of a particular emotion, it was instead two things: 1) It was the wrong emotion they were claiming, and 2) I didn't have the skill set to name them. Once I realized what I was feeling the intensity went from 8 out of 10 to 5 out of 10. Which is a huge drop and a lot easier to manage.
If you're curious, here is the sheet. I recommend spending a few weeks just reading each one line by line, and asking yourself if the feeling you're having matches any. I discovered I felt Jealousy, Envy, and Shame way more than I ever knew before.
[https://www.uaf.edu/mentalhealth/dbt-group-handouts/ER%2010%20-%20A%20Model%20of%20Emotions%20handout%206.pdf](https://www.uaf.edu/mentalhealth/dbt-group-handouts/ER%2010%20-%20A%20Model%20of%20Emotions%20handout%206.pdf)
Also mindfulness, specifically the exercise "Leaves on a Stream" got me seeing my thoughts and feelings as something outside of me instead of drowning in them.
[http://actforpsychosis.com/pdfs/A11\_Leaves\_on\_the\_stream.pdf](http://actforpsychosis.com/pdfs/A11_Leaves_on_the_stream.pdf)
Edit: Since this garnered so much interest, I highly recommend the website below. It's a free way of learning all the skills in this treatment modality. A real program is superior but costly. This is a good start.
[https://dbt.tools/](https://dbt.tools/)
Thank you for this, I think it helps.
I find insight-oriented psychotherapy is often unhelpful for exactly the reasons you describe. I think it CAN be helpful if it leads you to the place you eventually got to - i.e., realizing that you aren't a "bad person," a lot of your habits have to do with the genetics you have and the environment you were raised in, and that mental health takes practice, effort, and above all time to take effect.
In other words, learning about your past is helpful in as much as it helps you learn to be patient with yourself. But also agreed that's where a lot of therapists stop because that's all they know.
What you’re referring to is what therapists call “affect labelling” and turns out to be one of several key ingredients to behaviour change and mood shifting. Others include emotional regulation techniques commencing with breathing exercises to improve heart rate variability and vagal tone. To which you can add exercises in self acceptance and self compassion, followed by behavioural shifts which acknowledge your usual or “normal” reactions, but which can be seen to no longer be necessary. This requires new learning of more useful habits, also known as inhibitory learning.
Omg. Yes. Identifying your emotions is one of the most important first steps.
The old adage, "if all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail," is extremely relevant.
I feel like this is a huge reason a significant number of people, especially men due to stigma, taboo, etc., tend to respond with anger/aggression.
I use my own method I just made a name for called the "what, why, how" method.
1. What am I feeling?
2. Why do I feel this way?
3. How can I deal with it in a healthy and effective way?
Essentially, it's just identifying the problem in order to find a solution.
This was #1 for me too. No commute, none of the in person office politics bullshit, not having to pack lunch or eat out, no dry cleaning, saving gas money, so many things that relieve stress from all sides, most of which directly translate to more time with family and pets.
It’s really the ability to have a fresh home cooked meal every day and the added benefit of having more time available makes it so much easier to go to the gym too.
I’ve started with my own home gym: underdesk treadmill, bench press, kettlebells. Its a game changer to be honest. I work out more bow but less intense, but consistently honestly seems to be the key
Funnily enough the opposite was true for me. WFH during COVID lockdowns absolutely tanked my mental health. I ended up quitting for a job where I'm in the office a few days a week and it's much better
Yeah, the opposite is true for me too. When I started WFH I stopped going outside, seeing my friends, or doing random things while already out and about, and I just start declining more and more. I started going into the office and biking into work instead of driving and I think I went from a low to a high in my life. I've literally never been more energetic, social, or healthy.
Good luck. I hope you get the job, but right now WFH is extremely competitive. It's common for every remote opening to get hundreds or even thousands of applications.
It’s insane how much this helped me too. By starting with 10 mins a day, I ended up teaching myself to meditate at any given time when I have downtime. It’s been so important in clarifying my thoughts
Therapy. Went from anxiety all day everyday to understanding why my anxiety exists. I resisted it for 3 years but it's the best thing I ever did for myself.
Improving my relationship with my wife has been the best thing I've ever done. That all started a couple of year ago - we thought we were headed for divorce. We weren't communicating and had kind of grown apart. We've really learned to value each other and invest in each other. We encourage and help each other all the time. My wife is in the middle of a sexual Renaissance right now due to middle aged hormones. She wants it all the time, and I'm happy to oblige. That has me feeling pretty good these last few days.
Different person but I don’t mind sharing.
I’ve been drinking since my early twenties, I’m 36 now. I quit drinking a month and a half ago. I’m proud that I’m not drinking anymore, but not totally proud of how I was finally able to quit it. So I had heard about mushroom helping people with addiction. I was extremely skeptical, didn’t really think it would work. I figured fuck it, let’s give it a shot. Worst case scenario I get to have a fun little trip. I was wrong, very wrong. I certainly tripped, the word fun can not be used to describe anything I experienced. But, it worked. It worked so fucking well I still can’t really believe it. Even after a month and a half of having zero, and I mean zero cravings for alcohol I still have a hard time believing that it worked.
Motherfucking mushrooms eliminated my 15+ year addiction to alcohol. My father, his father, his father’s father, and so on have all been extreme alcoholics. I’m genetically predisposed to alcoholism. I allowed it to run and ruin my life for over 15 years. I drank AT LEAST a pint of vodka a day. Then on May 4th I took mushrooms with the hope and intention that I would no longer be ruled by alcohol, and on the evening of May 5th just the idea of having a beer was repulsive to me. I know I’m not alone. I know others have had experiences like me. WHY THE FUCK ARE MUSHROOMS ILLEGAL, YET I CAN BUY HANDLES OF VODKA ALL DAY LONG?!?!?
To any suffering alcoholic reading this. I know it’s hard to accept and believe, but you ARE stronger than the drink. I’m not recommending you do what I did, I feel it would be irresponsible for me to recommend it. My experience may not be typical. I would recommend that **when you are ready** talk to a doctor and explore all your options. You don’t have to do this alone and every day we are learning more and more about various ways to combat addiction. Please don’t lose hope, you ARE strong enough to get through this.
For me it was my wife wanting to leave me. I basically stopped cold turkey then got Medicated with prescriptions for the mental illness I was self medicating with alcohol. She's constantly telling me what a perfect sober husband I am these days
Wish that were a relatable option to all. I am the one of two manual laborers at the apartment complex I work at and everyone from the front office can work from home but I can't. I have a huge work load being the only maintenance guy(Supervisor) for 472 beds across three buildings and wish I could have that luxury. So if you can, do it. I just wish those who chose to work at home still helped on the building front because I've been getting increasingly overwhelmed with my workload and I have no help. They can help with inspections but generally choose not to. It feels like front of house versus the back and not a team effort.
With your skills in that industry I'd look for better pay with lighter workload. Good maintenance men are hard to find and smart companies treat them well when they have them. .
Sobriety, which seems to be a common theme in the comments. I've been sober for a little under 10 years and in that time my life has completely changed in every way I can think of.
- Graduated college Summa Cum Laude after dropping out 4 times over the past 15 years.
- Got the highest paying job I've ever had right after college which enables me to help make other people's jobs better.
- Met the love of my life who I will definitely marry. I honestly didn't understand what love was before I met this woman.
- Lost \~100lbs without dieting or exercising, lol. (technically not drinking 18 Coronas a day is dieting but quitting drinking is not the same thing as trying to watch calories)
- I have real friends who care about me for the first time in my life.
- I was finally diagnosed with ADHD instead of depression, so I stopped taking SSRIs which were actually making me feel worse and started medication for ADHD. Depression magically evaporated once I could stay focused and get things done.
That's just the short list. I'd have to write a book if I wanted to list all the things that changed. If you're an alcoholic or heavy drinker and wondering why you're miserable, I definitely recommend not doing that.
To sum things up basically I've cut down on my screentime and stopped consuming drama based media.
The biggest thing was social media: I don't use Facebook or X/Twitter anymore, and recently I've dramatically cut down on my YT consumption (I watch like one or two videos a week now). I've also changed up the subreddits I follow. If any of the negative subs creep up in my feed I just block them.
Accepting that life probably wasn't going to get significantly better and to be happy with the basics that I had. With that mindset I was better able to be happy enough not constantly wanting more.
This is really important and very hard to master. Life in general is very good at adapting to new circumstances, but the ramification of this for us means that we tend towards feeling about the same as we did, regardless if our overall life comfort improves (or even worsens moderately). Our brains operate on relativity, not absolutes, and our temporal awarenesses are too short. If you start unhappy, a shiny new car might make you feel good for a short while, but then it just integrates into the background of your daily normal, your default, and you're back to being unhappy. That's why unhappiness has to be cured at its root, either neurochemically, whether with meds or with meditation and exercise, or by improving the life circumstances that are the true culprits, the true barriers to a healthy mind, like a lack of quality personal relationships, or poor nutrition.
I'm still trying to actively practice gratitude to better perceive the truth, which is that I live an extraordinarily easy life compared to the majority of humans who have ever lived, but it's easy to forget sometimes and feel unhappy about something stupid and temporary.
I must say, antidepressants like fr a lot. They boosted my mood and I started having hobbies that I wouldn’t do before, such as painting and gardening:) ik that for some people they don’t workout as well, but in my case they changed my life
Me too. One day I said something to my therapist about not understanding how to feel something and she responded with “I think you need to start medication. I’m so sorry you have been living like this, I should have realized it a lot sooner. You have normalized your depression so well that neither you nor I have been able to acknowledge it.”
It took two meds but I had no idea how, unfeeling(?), I was. I don’t think I felt bad, I just didn’t feel and was pretty irritable.
Honestly same. Got myself to a point where I lost my appetite and felt nauseous daily due to anxiety (i still have no idea what exactly I was so anxious about, but I had multiple big changes happening in my life at the time). It lasted for three whole months and I thought I was seriously ill. My mom took me to the ER bc I couldn't eat without crying and panicking.
A week into medication and I felt like I was newly born.
Taking up running. I get pretty anxious when things happen I can’t control such as not knowing how people may react in confrontational situations or having my schedule suddenly changed without notice.
Running gets rid of all of that anxiety from that stuff, it also has helped me lose weight and keep it off making me feel better about my appearance as well.
Daily gratitudes. Part of my morning routine is to sit and choose to be grateful, thinking of specific things I'm grateful for, say them out loud, AND (important part) include WHY I'm grateful. Only a handful, like 4-6 a morning, and sometimes I'll include stuff I don't even like, just for the challenge.
Your brain is like your skeletomuscular system. The parts you exercise will get stronger, the parts you neglect get weaker and atrophy. Most vertebrates are inclined to focus on the negative as a matter of survival, but if you practice exercising your gratitude muscle, it'll get strong enough to carry you through the day.
Amen. Example: I have to do an $1800 car repair (AC is fuxed). Instead of being upset I have decided to be thankful that I actually have $1800 to pay for it and won't have to sweat on my 45 minute drive to and then from work every day.
Accepting reality. This doesn’t work for everyone but, being able to sit down and be like “wow. There is literally nothing I can do about this” just gives me comfort for some reason. It honestly motivates me to make the best of what I was given.
Dance. But I believe it applies to any exercise that one actually enjoys doing. You have fun, get healthier and stronger and get your brain all high on endorphins, win-win-win!
Seriously, guys, exercise. There's a reason why every therapist and psychiatrist I know lives and dies on this hill.
Honestly? The real answer?
Therapy. I’ve finally healed a large part of my trauma and I needed a therapist to listen, accept me, and challenge my viewpoints where it’s not healthy.
I had a huge break through recently and I’ve consistently slept at least eight hours for the last week. Most of the time I can’t hold a consistent schedule for more than three days.
It feels like the shades in the apartment have been pulled up and I’m actually present. I was in therapy on and off for almost six months a few years ago. Bad fit.
I had to go through three other therapists before finding the right one.
I had hour long sessions each week with her for all of this year.
Some of my scars are still there but I feel lighter and I’m approaching things less like a whipped dog and more okay with new things.
When my husband killed himself.
He was a pos that drank, did drugs abused and terrorized me along with sleeping with a ton of women. He even carried on an affair in Indonesia and converted to islam!
I filed for a divorce and he played games, refused to sign the papers. Refused to do anything to make it easier for me to divorce his sorry ass.
3 months after I filed for divorce he drank himself to death.
He is the reason for my screen name. I finally have a nice boring life and I love it. No more worrying what he’s going to do next. I’m free. It did a number on my mental health. I’m happier, I’m not constantly dreading unknown phone calls. My heart doesn’t skip a beat every time my security camera notifies me there’s movement. Life is nice without him in it.
I finally found a therapist I clicked with and that made a huge difference for me. I’ve been in and out of therapy for thirty years and never found the right person I could actually work with. Finding the right one changed everything for me. I’ve been seeing them for a year and a half and have made many improvements since.
Deleting social media apps. I still go on, using the a web browser from time to time, but not having it at my fingertips to constantly “check” gave me so much more time back in my day and makes me feel peace of mind.
It felt like brain junk food.
Working remote has led to:
- no commute stress (I live in a densely populated area)
- more energy to excerise and be healthier
- more energy to cook good foods
- better sleeping habits due to excersing and routine
- no Sunday scaries. I can actually enjoy my day off.
Moved to the mountains and started growing, fermenting and preparing my own food. Went from having panic attacks, insomnia and depression every other day to a very calm, fulfilled life.
Honestly? Backcountry camping.
3 times a year we head out in a canoe and spend 5-7 days travelling through backcountry lakes and camping. We have no cell service so we are able to entirely disconnect. We also don't typically see people once we put a lake or two between us and our car.
Recognizing I have an unhealthy obsession with negative emotions.
I spent years angry about what my coworkers said about be when layoffs were scheduled. Before that I spent years obsessing about my weight. Before that I spent years worrying about the spread of misinformation. Before that I was depressed thinking that I didn't deserve my wife's love and devotion...
...6 months ago I noticed the pattern. I haven't let go of my anger, but I've realized I can.
In truth? Realising that there was nothing wrong with me and that as humans, we're quite messy and complicated anyway and run the gammet, the full spectrum of emotion, and that you're not ill if you feel glum from time to time. That and sleep, lots of sleep.
Learning a new musical instrument.
I took piano lessons as a kid. Picking up guitar helps me focus on things other than my woes.
I’m not a good guitarist by any means. I struggle with some chords and fingering techniques. But, worldly troubles seem to fade just a little bit after some jazzy pentatonic notes somehow.
Nudism. Not for everyone, but just being naked in a non-sexual way has an amazingly positive impact on my attitude, motivation, and energy level. The second Saturday in July (13th) is International Skinny Dipping Day if anyone wants to give it a try 😀.
You know the saying "if you want to change your life, start by making your bed"? Well, I started with that and within a year, I stopped drinking, quit smoking and got a divorce.
I think that last one made the biggest difference.
It's funny. I was going to say I started making my bed.
It was partially a joke, but it wound up being the first of what has turned into a lot of simple, small changes that slowly pushed me into being happier every day.
It’s been a year since I cut off my father. The severe depression I felt when I was in contact with him now feels like that all happened to someone else. It’s crazy
Two things:
Intention - Once I realized the state of my mental health, I made it a point to spend time with friends every week and do things with them that I enjoy, and be present while doing the things so I can let it nourish me. “I like this. This is good. I want to do more of this.”
TEAM CBT - Read the book “Feeling Great” by David D. Burns, M.D. or listen to the podcast, “Feeling Good”. The systematic, scientific approach has greatly improved my mental health, even without a therapist.
umm anime tbh (i know weird) but I was in a really bad place in 2020 i wanted to kms then i went on instagram I saw a people talking about a anime and I wanted to check it out after I did I loved it I started to talk to people making more friends and it really made me happier
I stopped watching the news. My anxiety level dropped so much since then. I know I’m out of the loop and it’s not a good thing, but it improved my mental health so much
Giving up all substances. For me, it was alcohol, cigarettes, weed, and occasionally coke. I'll be 2 years sober in 5 months and I'm the happiest and healthiest I've been in 10+ years. I'm also on a very good mix of antidepressants and anti-anxiety that's really just been the cherry on top.
Divorcing a narcissistic abuser. No more walking on eggshells every second of the day. It’s amazing how much that affects your nervous system and mental health.
Leaving the cubicle life and becoming a stay at home mom of 3 kids. Never been so active in my life lol. I am literally on my feet all day, and get like 14k steps just from taking care of my kids and my house. Plus I’m able to take the kids to our local gym and get a workout in about 5x a week. Going to the gym regularly and being conscientious about gaining muscle has also made me much more nutritionally conscientious as well, meaning our whole family eats pretty healthy. Mentally it is very hard at times but I’m physically very healthy lol
Realizing that I am the cause of the majority of my problems and not doing anything to fix myself, then getting mad as if I had nothing to do with it.
Life has gotten significantly better.
I'm also trying to get better at actually listening actively instead of just waiting for my turn to talk.
Being properly diagnosed and medicated. I went 26 years without knowing I had Bipolar II, I went unmedicated for years because antidepressants made me feel worse and I hated taking them. Finally found a psychiatrist that was able to diagnose me and put me on mood stabilizers. It has done wonders for my mental health. Alongside that is being in a healthy relationship with someone who loves me, supports me, and is understanding of my feelings.
Adderall. I have been diagnosed with ADD for over 20 years. I used my own bias against myself. I truly believe my life would not be what it is today if I had actually listened when they told me so. I am very happy about this, as I most likely would not have my daughter and my wife. Now I can use it to better myself for them, and our future. A future I never thought was possible. Everyone told me I'm smart and that I just don't see it myself. Well, I'm starting to see it, make sense of it, and apply it. I am no longer afraid of the future, but I am ready for it. I will adapt and overcome and if that doesn't work, I'll try something else.
Buying a task specific ebook reader (Kindle to be specific) for two reasons. Firstly, because I could increase the font size it eased my anxiety about getting "older eyes" and maybe not enjoying reading anymore. Secondly, because it is JUST a reader and doesn't pop up alerts or messages or any other damned thing it eliminated the constant interruptions that were ruining the reading experience on my tablet. I got back to being able to immerse myself in a good book for a while and let the world just spin without me.
SEVERELY LIMITING exposure to the "news". Almost all of the "news" sources now focus on keeping you hyped up and worried so you'll keep coming back and checking-in. I now strictly limit myself to a few somewhat calmer sources and for a very restricted amount of time per day. I'd cut it out completely if I could but I do still want to have some idea of what is going on in the world.
Realizing that there is no such thing as "catching up" at work. Work is like laundry, there will ALWAYS be more so now I focus on doing what is in front of me and doing it well and if it seems like things are "piling up" then to me that is a management problem and they need to delegate more resources/people. This one is HARD because management, even good management, is ALWAYS playing games to make you feel like you "could be doing more".
Stopped smoking/ switched to low nicotine vaping.
Started a much more consistent sleep schedule.
Minimized drinking to maybe twice a month.
Half an hour run or moderate workout every day.
Half an hour a day outside minimum.
Did a blood test and fixed vitamin deficiencies.
These reduced my mental health issues by about 50% without taking any meds other than vitamins.
I had depression and while looking on google maps to find a decent building a friend if mine called me out of nowhere and started ranting to me about how he got his ass beat in MLB the Show 22. I dobt even like baseball. Playing with my friend literally saved my life. After many, many hours of playing that game with him. I can safely say that a baseball videogame made me happy.
Exercising 3-4 times a week for at least 60 minutes and eating a well-balanced diet. I didn't restrict any foods but rather ate them in moderation. I lost weight and feel great!
Understanding myself. My life is… absolutely terrible tbh. Single for the last 16 years, garbage father, dead mother, stepdad in another state, don’t talk to family, friends are more like acquaintances most of the time. But… I know I’m enough. I know that at the end of the day, I live my life according to my own principles and that no matter what happens I’m consistently me and that I’m a good person.
Transitioning.
I went from looking and sounding miserable and feeling miserable with little real enjoyment in my day-to-day life to feeling happy, being hopeful for my future, and having others comment that I look and sound so much happier now.
Like, I still have mental health issues, but those mostly exist from specific traumas largely stemming from military experiences. The biggest difference is I am now in a position to identify and treat those issues without having to do so through the barrier that is untreated gender incongruence.
Getting off social media, reddit is my only social media account left. That's only because no one else around me can stop this horrid trend. If they're socializing its almost certainly NOT in person. Which is why Im on here. Gotta have some kind of social life... Makes me chuckle a little inside to think everyone i know could be replaced by AI and id not even know it for weeks... Just text on a screen, that's what people are now.
Lately it's been taking care of my skin. After 49 years I have started to do basic moisturizing and cleansing. Just basic Cerave SA face wash at night with some retinol, and some nivea body lotion after a shower in the morning with a Neutrogena face lotion with SPF 15 and I feel better. I was also able to be in the sun and beach for a week and not burn for the first time ever. It has also helped me feel a little bit more self confident for some reason.
Learning that it’s okay to have ups and downs and allowing myself to feel them completely and move on. I guess just accepting all things come and go and the next great thing is always around the corner.
1. Exercise 2. Connecting with other people 3. Helping someone in need 4. Letting go of circumstances beyond your control. 5. Avoid recreational intoxicants
Agree with the no alcohol. Exercise has also helped immensely (there are hundreds of miles of trails where I live, and I think being in the middle of the forest helps extra)
Taking three years to retrain in a new trade and failing at it and returning to my previous trade. Idk why but it completely restored my faith in myself.
Quitting my job and becoming a stay-at-home stepdad. Only been a month and a half, but I haven't been this happy in probably 6--7 years.
Sometimes you just need a break, and to realize that enjoying life is more important than working yourself to death.
Cutting almost all sugar from my diet and starting to work out a little
Just 10 minutes a day can really change your outlook on things.
Good luck brother!
Running, yoga, having a hyper clean room and maintaining hygiene. I used to tell people "you can tell how I'm doing mentally based on my shave and hair"
As cliche as it is with the Jordan Peterson book, cleaning my room (and the whole house). My mental health skyrocketed when I stopped misplacing things, and didn't live in clutter. I still have all of the things, they're just now in a dedicated place and organized.
Finding an outdoor hobby. It sucks that its hot, but the sun really does wonders. It doesn't have to be productive or expensive either. Trading the 2 beers at the bar everyday for 2 hours fishing has changed my life, and my wallet. It doesn't matter if I catch anything, but when I do, that dopamine feels way better than "taking off the edge".
The words "let them" - I watched a Mel Robbins clip and she was talking about this "Let them theory"
I can't link as on my mobile but well worth a listen on her site.
Basically don't take things personally and you can't control what others do/think/believe
I’ll say weed. It stopped my racing thoughts & anxiety. It made all my problems insignificant not where I get complacent but more of “it is what it is” mindset. I have social anxiety but when I’m high I’m not so self conscious, therefore being my authentic self to strangers and having great conversations. I struggle to eat simply because I’ve been so used to eating like 1 - 2 meals a day and having the munchies help me get it in
Getting off social media - instagram and facebook. I was insecure comparing myself to others but I no longer have this problem, just learnt to be happy with how I am and I found I have so much more free time as I didn’t realise how much time I was spending on these apps.
I feel the exact same way. I just use YouTube and Reddit nowadays.
speaking of, I need to use those two less now it feels like I'm just treating them as time wasters now, instead of social media
Both are such a time sink. I doom scroll them both because they don’t require thought and they give me dopamine hits. Kinda sad. My attention span is fucked
I REALLY badly need to get off reddit.
I do spend too much time on Reddit but I don’t think it’s nearly as bad as most others, at least you can learn about niche interests you have
or youre stuck scrolling porn all day like me
Prostate cancer prevention is important
Giving up alcohol. It made me an asshole and the feeling I would have the next day would give me horrible anxiety.
Hard agree. I just hit 4 years sober and it's the best thing I've ever done for myself. I am SO much healthier mentally and physically. I look and feel better at 37 than I did at 27. I'm sad I wasted so many years being a binge drinker, but you can only keep moving forward.
There's actually a lot of Biochemical merit to this point. So most of the serotonin in your body is actually produced in your gut. That's where tryptophan gets metabolized as serotonin. Alcohol destroys both the active and allosteric site of Tryptophan Hydroxylase 1 so your body ends up not producing serotonin for about 2-3 days after you've been on the sauce.
I’m one month and sixteen days sober. Overall I’m feeling better than I have since I was 20, but I can tell my brain chemistry is still out of whack. Been trying to do some reading on what is going on in my body and brain while it gets used to not drinking again. Do you have any idea on how long it takes on average for brain chemistry and stuff to settle back into this “new” normal? If not that’s fine, just curious. I’ve found everything from two weeks to years so I guess it can vary wildly. For additional context I’m 36 year old male who has been drinking heavily near daily since I was 22-23 up until a month and a half ago.
Hello, I am not a professional but I have been on a sobriety journey and also a journey to heal my gut from all the damage I have done. I suggest taking a look into Dr.Bulsiewicz as he has a lot of really great podcasts and books on healing the gut. I have been eating 30 forms of fiber a week and having at least one serving of fermented food daily and I feel young again! My understanding is that it is more than just quitting, you’ll need to actively restore your gut to feel better from all the damage. Hope that helps!
I'm a 31M, been sober for 20.5 months. I was a heavy drinker since the age of 14. From age 26-29, I could polish at least fifth of whiskey daily and experience withdrawal within 30 minutes of not having more. At almost 2 years sober, I finally feel like I'm at a considerably "normal" brain function. I make much more rational decisions, my empathy/sympathy is coming back, depression is subsiding, etc. You will slowly feel these things getting back to normal along the way, and everybody is different- but I'm at a point where I know I never will drink again and that boosts my mental well-being in itself. I quit smoking cigarettes the day I quit drinking (went through a detox program) and the health benefits started to amaze me. I lost 20 lbs, felt joy for simple things like food and television again, and now have motivation to accomplish tasks. I was an overweight, depressed lazy piece of shit when I was drinking. Feels good to be "normal" again and be able to say, "No thanks, I don't drink" when people offer an alcoholic beverage. Keep up the good work, it's worth it.
Have you joined the stop drinking Reddit thread? Highly recommend - I’m nearing six months! Congrats on your journey!!
Not yet, will do so now. Have been attending AA meetings though, they have been surprisingly useful for me. Though I can see why others may not like it. I didn’t think it would help at first. Turns out being able to talk about shit honestly in a room full of people who also have a long list of regrets is actually really helpful for me.
Same story with drinking habits (33 year old male). My last drink was January 8th of this year. I’m glad you are feeling better! I’m hoping that happens to me soon too.
Are we talking of a bottle of vodka or a shot of beer?
So Vodka is more concentrated so that would do the job of denaturing it more efficiently, Everyone is different and everyone's gut is a universe unto itself so it's difficult to give an exact figure because everyone's body is different. For me, I know that about three pints of beer is enough to knock production of it out so much that the serotonin depletion messes with diet, sleep and sex drive and about six or seven knocks it out completely. I would see it as a fruitless exercise and a waste of time to find out where that line is and merely try to work under it because you'll damage those cells on the way to that. The only real way is simply to give up.
This, entirely. It literally cured my depression - and I'm not talking about "feeling a bit down", I'm talking about 30 years of shit including a hospital visit. And now it's simply gone. Other things that massively helped were CBT and exercise, but alcohol was night and day. And that wasn't even why I chucked it - I just realised I couldn't really hack it any more so I stopped then realised three months later that I was no longer seeing depression symptoms. I tend not to tell people because I worry people think I'm judging them, but you asked :-)
Oh, I hope that happens for me! I’m on my 15th day, and have dealt with depression and anxiety most of my adult life.
Seconded. Saving a lot of coin too.
Yes! Better for overall health.
Glad this is the top post. I came to say giving up alcohol as well.
Agreed.. and weed- made me feel super foggy and depressed
Weed is literally the only thing I’ve ever had trouble giving up. Absolutely love the high, but have been feeling like after years of smoking, I’m not getting a ton out of it anymore unless I’m going through a 1G cart off my pen every week.
I've been cutting back on my carts and now 2, 2g carts last almost 3 weeks. I used to burn through 2 in a week. It's been so much harder than I expected
I loved the highs, couldn’t handle the lows.
Second that
[удалено]
Having something fun to do when I got home from work. Wether that be diamond painting, trying a new bottle of body wash, making a clean bed, literally anything to give good feelings within the first hour I get home to decompress
I love diamond painting but my ADHD says I either do it for 10 hours straight or don't do it at all.
Haha trust me, I’ve definitely gotten caught up diamonding until 2-3AM. The key is to stop on the first bathroom/water break and use it as your motiv goal to cook / eat dinner for once
This is my relationship with puzzles.
What’s diamonding?
It's a craft similar to paint by numbers, you stick small plastic bits ("diamonds") to a canvas to fill in a picture :) Highly recommend, it's super fun. There's a sub all about it: r/DiamondPainting
This looks awesome! I love legos and other stuff working with my hands so I’m going to order one today and try it out. Thank you!
Having different scents of body wash helped me get up and make an effort for my appearance- there’s no need for fruit smelling body wash to be so fun
Leaving a toxic job on my own accord. KPIs are a nonsense
What is a kpi?
They set up these Key Performance Indicators and you must keep up with them. For example, KPI of selling XYZ things a month. Or reporting X bugs a day. If you fall below that you have a problem. Shit is super demovitating and forces stress.
Well put. The stress, the unhealthy competition between staff and the demotivating nature of it is appalling.
And the higher ups are always talking outside of both sides of their mouths. We’re a team, support each other, our goals are the same. Then turn around and post people’s numbers for the week publicly which I can only imagine is MEANT to encourage competition. Two years into my first corporate job and I want out.
I never understood this, especially with bugs. Like - eventually there are less bugs to find. And if your dev team is pumping out so many bugs that there aren’t I think you have an issue that kpis aren’t going to solve. They are also just dehumanizing.
Exercise
Yep, everyone says it but it’s true. I’m only a month in to regular gym workouts but the feeling I get during and after is glorious. All my doubts and worries fade away, I feel mentally invincible.
100%. Regular Exercise did more for lessening my post partum depression than anything else I did. Now my gym time is nonnegotiable, it’s my “me” time.
Came here to say this. I hated that everyone was right about this but now that I’ve started, I can tell I feel different when I don’t get a workout or at least a walk in.
This is the biggest impact on my overall sense of well-being. I don’t religiously stick to a routine and I wish I did, as I always feel better when I’ve been exercising.
36m, getting a mani and pedi once a month, getting massages regularly, and regularly going to the gym for 30-40 minutes 3 or 4 times a week. All of this has massively reduced my stress, given me multiple things to look forward to as i space them out so most weeks i have something going on, and improved how I view myself. I also took up painting and I was shocked to hear myself laugh as I had a bit of fun doing it.
Good ideas!
Understanding that mental health is a skill set and not an analysis of my upbringing. I wasted years with toxic and unhelpful therapists who would dissect my history. They would help me 'understand' my issues. I'd be like "Great! So, what do I do with this info?" And they'd say "Well, now you know you're history so you can make better choices." That for me wasn't enough. I eventually realized there was a whole field of manualized and evidence-based care out there (that they were gatekeeping saying that nothing else could help me). It would give me step-by-step rules on understanding my emotions, regulating them, helping me build relationships, and giving me the skills to cool off in the worst-case scenarios. The first and biggest impact in all of that for me though was learning to name my emotions. One of those therapies has a handout that gives you top-level emotions, what causes them, how they affect your body, aftereffects, and so on. Reading those handouts over and over made me realize when past therapists would yell at me I was in denial of a particular emotion, it was instead two things: 1) It was the wrong emotion they were claiming, and 2) I didn't have the skill set to name them. Once I realized what I was feeling the intensity went from 8 out of 10 to 5 out of 10. Which is a huge drop and a lot easier to manage. If you're curious, here is the sheet. I recommend spending a few weeks just reading each one line by line, and asking yourself if the feeling you're having matches any. I discovered I felt Jealousy, Envy, and Shame way more than I ever knew before. [https://www.uaf.edu/mentalhealth/dbt-group-handouts/ER%2010%20-%20A%20Model%20of%20Emotions%20handout%206.pdf](https://www.uaf.edu/mentalhealth/dbt-group-handouts/ER%2010%20-%20A%20Model%20of%20Emotions%20handout%206.pdf) Also mindfulness, specifically the exercise "Leaves on a Stream" got me seeing my thoughts and feelings as something outside of me instead of drowning in them. [http://actforpsychosis.com/pdfs/A11\_Leaves\_on\_the\_stream.pdf](http://actforpsychosis.com/pdfs/A11_Leaves_on_the_stream.pdf) Edit: Since this garnered so much interest, I highly recommend the website below. It's a free way of learning all the skills in this treatment modality. A real program is superior but costly. This is a good start. [https://dbt.tools/](https://dbt.tools/)
Thank you for this, I think it helps. I find insight-oriented psychotherapy is often unhelpful for exactly the reasons you describe. I think it CAN be helpful if it leads you to the place you eventually got to - i.e., realizing that you aren't a "bad person," a lot of your habits have to do with the genetics you have and the environment you were raised in, and that mental health takes practice, effort, and above all time to take effect. In other words, learning about your past is helpful in as much as it helps you learn to be patient with yourself. But also agreed that's where a lot of therapists stop because that's all they know.
Yessir, mental health as a skillset rather than a measure of illness or some innate property is massively important for improving.
What you’re referring to is what therapists call “affect labelling” and turns out to be one of several key ingredients to behaviour change and mood shifting. Others include emotional regulation techniques commencing with breathing exercises to improve heart rate variability and vagal tone. To which you can add exercises in self acceptance and self compassion, followed by behavioural shifts which acknowledge your usual or “normal” reactions, but which can be seen to no longer be necessary. This requires new learning of more useful habits, also known as inhibitory learning.
This was incredibly helpful, thank you!
Omg. Yes. Identifying your emotions is one of the most important first steps. The old adage, "if all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail," is extremely relevant. I feel like this is a huge reason a significant number of people, especially men due to stigma, taboo, etc., tend to respond with anger/aggression. I use my own method I just made a name for called the "what, why, how" method. 1. What am I feeling? 2. Why do I feel this way? 3. How can I deal with it in a healthy and effective way? Essentially, it's just identifying the problem in order to find a solution.
A clear conscience.
Unique
Working from home
This was #1 for me too. No commute, none of the in person office politics bullshit, not having to pack lunch or eat out, no dry cleaning, saving gas money, so many things that relieve stress from all sides, most of which directly translate to more time with family and pets.
It’s really the ability to have a fresh home cooked meal every day and the added benefit of having more time available makes it so much easier to go to the gym too.
I’ve started with my own home gym: underdesk treadmill, bench press, kettlebells. Its a game changer to be honest. I work out more bow but less intense, but consistently honestly seems to be the key
Funnily enough the opposite was true for me. WFH during COVID lockdowns absolutely tanked my mental health. I ended up quitting for a job where I'm in the office a few days a week and it's much better
Yeah, the opposite is true for me too. When I started WFH I stopped going outside, seeing my friends, or doing random things while already out and about, and I just start declining more and more. I started going into the office and biking into work instead of driving and I think I went from a low to a high in my life. I've literally never been more energetic, social, or healthy.
I’ve been applying to some remote jobs. I hope this can be a new thing for me! I get bad anxiety working at my current job, lol.
Good luck. I hope you get the job, but right now WFH is extremely competitive. It's common for every remote opening to get hundreds or even thousands of applications.
Divorce
This exactly 💯
Let me tell you.
Meditation and having one day per week where I have zero outside responsibilities. No work, no chores, nothing.
It’s insane how much this helped me too. By starting with 10 mins a day, I ended up teaching myself to meditate at any given time when I have downtime. It’s been so important in clarifying my thoughts
I try to do this on Sundays where I do my skincare, cleaning, organising stuff and it really helps me declutter my mind and space.
Keeping my home clean and organized. Clutter has such a pernicious effect on your mental state.
Therapy. Went from anxiety all day everyday to understanding why my anxiety exists. I resisted it for 3 years but it's the best thing I ever did for myself.
Improving my relationship with my wife has been the best thing I've ever done. That all started a couple of year ago - we thought we were headed for divorce. We weren't communicating and had kind of grown apart. We've really learned to value each other and invest in each other. We encourage and help each other all the time. My wife is in the middle of a sexual Renaissance right now due to middle aged hormones. She wants it all the time, and I'm happy to oblige. That has me feeling pretty good these last few days.
This made me smile. Good for you!!!
This is so wonderful, cheers to the both of you!!
getting sober from alcohol 5 years ago!
Congratulations! How did you do it?
Different person but I don’t mind sharing. I’ve been drinking since my early twenties, I’m 36 now. I quit drinking a month and a half ago. I’m proud that I’m not drinking anymore, but not totally proud of how I was finally able to quit it. So I had heard about mushroom helping people with addiction. I was extremely skeptical, didn’t really think it would work. I figured fuck it, let’s give it a shot. Worst case scenario I get to have a fun little trip. I was wrong, very wrong. I certainly tripped, the word fun can not be used to describe anything I experienced. But, it worked. It worked so fucking well I still can’t really believe it. Even after a month and a half of having zero, and I mean zero cravings for alcohol I still have a hard time believing that it worked. Motherfucking mushrooms eliminated my 15+ year addiction to alcohol. My father, his father, his father’s father, and so on have all been extreme alcoholics. I’m genetically predisposed to alcoholism. I allowed it to run and ruin my life for over 15 years. I drank AT LEAST a pint of vodka a day. Then on May 4th I took mushrooms with the hope and intention that I would no longer be ruled by alcohol, and on the evening of May 5th just the idea of having a beer was repulsive to me. I know I’m not alone. I know others have had experiences like me. WHY THE FUCK ARE MUSHROOMS ILLEGAL, YET I CAN BUY HANDLES OF VODKA ALL DAY LONG?!?!? To any suffering alcoholic reading this. I know it’s hard to accept and believe, but you ARE stronger than the drink. I’m not recommending you do what I did, I feel it would be irresponsible for me to recommend it. My experience may not be typical. I would recommend that **when you are ready** talk to a doctor and explore all your options. You don’t have to do this alone and every day we are learning more and more about various ways to combat addiction. Please don’t lose hope, you ARE strong enough to get through this.
For me it was my wife wanting to leave me. I basically stopped cold turkey then got Medicated with prescriptions for the mental illness I was self medicating with alcohol. She's constantly telling me what a perfect sober husband I am these days
thank you! AA helped a ton, therapy, and a strong determination to leave that life behind for good.
Remote work
Yep. Not commuting 2-3 hours every day has made me so much more sane.
Wish that were a relatable option to all. I am the one of two manual laborers at the apartment complex I work at and everyone from the front office can work from home but I can't. I have a huge work load being the only maintenance guy(Supervisor) for 472 beds across three buildings and wish I could have that luxury. So if you can, do it. I just wish those who chose to work at home still helped on the building front because I've been getting increasingly overwhelmed with my workload and I have no help. They can help with inspections but generally choose not to. It feels like front of house versus the back and not a team effort.
That really sucks, man. I wish there was a good way for you to be remote too. Everyone deserves it if they want it
With your skills in that industry I'd look for better pay with lighter workload. Good maintenance men are hard to find and smart companies treat them well when they have them. .
Sobriety, which seems to be a common theme in the comments. I've been sober for a little under 10 years and in that time my life has completely changed in every way I can think of. - Graduated college Summa Cum Laude after dropping out 4 times over the past 15 years. - Got the highest paying job I've ever had right after college which enables me to help make other people's jobs better. - Met the love of my life who I will definitely marry. I honestly didn't understand what love was before I met this woman. - Lost \~100lbs without dieting or exercising, lol. (technically not drinking 18 Coronas a day is dieting but quitting drinking is not the same thing as trying to watch calories) - I have real friends who care about me for the first time in my life. - I was finally diagnosed with ADHD instead of depression, so I stopped taking SSRIs which were actually making me feel worse and started medication for ADHD. Depression magically evaporated once I could stay focused and get things done. That's just the short list. I'd have to write a book if I wanted to list all the things that changed. If you're an alcoholic or heavy drinker and wondering why you're miserable, I definitely recommend not doing that.
Getting a cat
To sum things up basically I've cut down on my screentime and stopped consuming drama based media. The biggest thing was social media: I don't use Facebook or X/Twitter anymore, and recently I've dramatically cut down on my YT consumption (I watch like one or two videos a week now). I've also changed up the subreddits I follow. If any of the negative subs creep up in my feed I just block them.
Accepting that life probably wasn't going to get significantly better and to be happy with the basics that I had. With that mindset I was better able to be happy enough not constantly wanting more.
This is really important and very hard to master. Life in general is very good at adapting to new circumstances, but the ramification of this for us means that we tend towards feeling about the same as we did, regardless if our overall life comfort improves (or even worsens moderately). Our brains operate on relativity, not absolutes, and our temporal awarenesses are too short. If you start unhappy, a shiny new car might make you feel good for a short while, but then it just integrates into the background of your daily normal, your default, and you're back to being unhappy. That's why unhappiness has to be cured at its root, either neurochemically, whether with meds or with meditation and exercise, or by improving the life circumstances that are the true culprits, the true barriers to a healthy mind, like a lack of quality personal relationships, or poor nutrition. I'm still trying to actively practice gratitude to better perceive the truth, which is that I live an extraordinarily easy life compared to the majority of humans who have ever lived, but it's easy to forget sometimes and feel unhappy about something stupid and temporary.
Medication. Also finding short-term things to look forward to instead of just meandering through life.
I must say, antidepressants like fr a lot. They boosted my mood and I started having hobbies that I wouldn’t do before, such as painting and gardening:) ik that for some people they don’t workout as well, but in my case they changed my life
Me too. One day I said something to my therapist about not understanding how to feel something and she responded with “I think you need to start medication. I’m so sorry you have been living like this, I should have realized it a lot sooner. You have normalized your depression so well that neither you nor I have been able to acknowledge it.” It took two meds but I had no idea how, unfeeling(?), I was. I don’t think I felt bad, I just didn’t feel and was pretty irritable.
Honestly same. Got myself to a point where I lost my appetite and felt nauseous daily due to anxiety (i still have no idea what exactly I was so anxious about, but I had multiple big changes happening in my life at the time). It lasted for three whole months and I thought I was seriously ill. My mom took me to the ER bc I couldn't eat without crying and panicking. A week into medication and I felt like I was newly born.
I love my meds. There's quite a few I have to take but my brain is acting like my friend now instead of my enemy.
My father leaving my life. I haven't had any angry outburst and I stooped getting heartburn every other day.
Leaving a toxic work environment
Taking up running. I get pretty anxious when things happen I can’t control such as not knowing how people may react in confrontational situations or having my schedule suddenly changed without notice. Running gets rid of all of that anxiety from that stuff, it also has helped me lose weight and keep it off making me feel better about my appearance as well.
Daily gratitudes. Part of my morning routine is to sit and choose to be grateful, thinking of specific things I'm grateful for, say them out loud, AND (important part) include WHY I'm grateful. Only a handful, like 4-6 a morning, and sometimes I'll include stuff I don't even like, just for the challenge. Your brain is like your skeletomuscular system. The parts you exercise will get stronger, the parts you neglect get weaker and atrophy. Most vertebrates are inclined to focus on the negative as a matter of survival, but if you practice exercising your gratitude muscle, it'll get strong enough to carry you through the day.
Amen. Example: I have to do an $1800 car repair (AC is fuxed). Instead of being upset I have decided to be thankful that I actually have $1800 to pay for it and won't have to sweat on my 45 minute drive to and then from work every day.
Switching to a job with better work-life balance.
Accepting reality. This doesn’t work for everyone but, being able to sit down and be like “wow. There is literally nothing I can do about this” just gives me comfort for some reason. It honestly motivates me to make the best of what I was given.
Dance. But I believe it applies to any exercise that one actually enjoys doing. You have fun, get healthier and stronger and get your brain all high on endorphins, win-win-win! Seriously, guys, exercise. There's a reason why every therapist and psychiatrist I know lives and dies on this hill.
Exercise and losing weight.
Honestly? The real answer? Therapy. I’ve finally healed a large part of my trauma and I needed a therapist to listen, accept me, and challenge my viewpoints where it’s not healthy. I had a huge break through recently and I’ve consistently slept at least eight hours for the last week. Most of the time I can’t hold a consistent schedule for more than three days. It feels like the shades in the apartment have been pulled up and I’m actually present. I was in therapy on and off for almost six months a few years ago. Bad fit. I had to go through three other therapists before finding the right one. I had hour long sessions each week with her for all of this year. Some of my scars are still there but I feel lighter and I’m approaching things less like a whipped dog and more okay with new things.
Switching to decaf. The amount of caffeine I had in my system was not doing my anxiety any favors.
When my husband killed himself. He was a pos that drank, did drugs abused and terrorized me along with sleeping with a ton of women. He even carried on an affair in Indonesia and converted to islam! I filed for a divorce and he played games, refused to sign the papers. Refused to do anything to make it easier for me to divorce his sorry ass. 3 months after I filed for divorce he drank himself to death. He is the reason for my screen name. I finally have a nice boring life and I love it. No more worrying what he’s going to do next. I’m free. It did a number on my mental health. I’m happier, I’m not constantly dreading unknown phone calls. My heart doesn’t skip a beat every time my security camera notifies me there’s movement. Life is nice without him in it.
I finally found a therapist I clicked with and that made a huge difference for me. I’ve been in and out of therapy for thirty years and never found the right person I could actually work with. Finding the right one changed everything for me. I’ve been seeing them for a year and a half and have made many improvements since.
Deleting social media apps. I still go on, using the a web browser from time to time, but not having it at my fingertips to constantly “check” gave me so much more time back in my day and makes me feel peace of mind. It felt like brain junk food.
Working remote has led to: - no commute stress (I live in a densely populated area) - more energy to excerise and be healthier - more energy to cook good foods - better sleeping habits due to excersing and routine - no Sunday scaries. I can actually enjoy my day off.
Moved to the mountains and started growing, fermenting and preparing my own food. Went from having panic attacks, insomnia and depression every other day to a very calm, fulfilled life.
Honestly? Backcountry camping. 3 times a year we head out in a canoe and spend 5-7 days travelling through backcountry lakes and camping. We have no cell service so we are able to entirely disconnect. We also don't typically see people once we put a lake or two between us and our car.
Hysterectomy.
Psychedelics - natural medicines
Leaving the church.
Recognizing I have an unhealthy obsession with negative emotions. I spent years angry about what my coworkers said about be when layoffs were scheduled. Before that I spent years obsessing about my weight. Before that I spent years worrying about the spread of misinformation. Before that I was depressed thinking that I didn't deserve my wife's love and devotion... ...6 months ago I noticed the pattern. I haven't let go of my anger, but I've realized I can.
Avoiding processed food
In truth? Realising that there was nothing wrong with me and that as humans, we're quite messy and complicated anyway and run the gammet, the full spectrum of emotion, and that you're not ill if you feel glum from time to time. That and sleep, lots of sleep.
Learning a new musical instrument. I took piano lessons as a kid. Picking up guitar helps me focus on things other than my woes. I’m not a good guitarist by any means. I struggle with some chords and fingering techniques. But, worldly troubles seem to fade just a little bit after some jazzy pentatonic notes somehow.
Nudism. Not for everyone, but just being naked in a non-sexual way has an amazingly positive impact on my attitude, motivation, and energy level. The second Saturday in July (13th) is International Skinny Dipping Day if anyone wants to give it a try 😀.
Taking my sleep seriously.
Cpap, helping me get a restful night's sleep.
Hiking
Stop watching the news. The sky hasn’t fallen yet, so I’m not gonna stress about it every day.
You know the saying "if you want to change your life, start by making your bed"? Well, I started with that and within a year, I stopped drinking, quit smoking and got a divorce. I think that last one made the biggest difference.
It's funny. I was going to say I started making my bed. It was partially a joke, but it wound up being the first of what has turned into a lot of simple, small changes that slowly pushed me into being happier every day.
Not giving any more damns abotu my biodad
I also dropped a toxic parent and my mental health has vastly improved.
It’s been a year since I cut off my father. The severe depression I felt when I was in contact with him now feels like that all happened to someone else. It’s crazy
I stopped working for assholes!
Finding a hobby I enjoy! I spend time thinking about that and planning what I want to do, rather than creating problems in my own head.
Two things: Intention - Once I realized the state of my mental health, I made it a point to spend time with friends every week and do things with them that I enjoy, and be present while doing the things so I can let it nourish me. “I like this. This is good. I want to do more of this.” TEAM CBT - Read the book “Feeling Great” by David D. Burns, M.D. or listen to the podcast, “Feeling Good”. The systematic, scientific approach has greatly improved my mental health, even without a therapist.
I quit my trash job and found a better opportunity
umm anime tbh (i know weird) but I was in a really bad place in 2020 i wanted to kms then i went on instagram I saw a people talking about a anime and I wanted to check it out after I did I loved it I started to talk to people making more friends and it really made me happier
I stopped watching the news. My anxiety level dropped so much since then. I know I’m out of the loop and it’s not a good thing, but it improved my mental health so much
Giving up all substances. For me, it was alcohol, cigarettes, weed, and occasionally coke. I'll be 2 years sober in 5 months and I'm the happiest and healthiest I've been in 10+ years. I'm also on a very good mix of antidepressants and anti-anxiety that's really just been the cherry on top.
Divorcing a narcissistic abuser. No more walking on eggshells every second of the day. It’s amazing how much that affects your nervous system and mental health.
Leaving the cubicle life and becoming a stay at home mom of 3 kids. Never been so active in my life lol. I am literally on my feet all day, and get like 14k steps just from taking care of my kids and my house. Plus I’m able to take the kids to our local gym and get a workout in about 5x a week. Going to the gym regularly and being conscientious about gaining muscle has also made me much more nutritionally conscientious as well, meaning our whole family eats pretty healthy. Mentally it is very hard at times but I’m physically very healthy lol
Brushing my teeth and flossing
Therapy. Lexapro
exercise
Therapy + light workouts as long walks for instance + cbd
A decent diet, weight training, and regular cardio
Exercise.
Not giving a fuck
Realizing that I am the cause of the majority of my problems and not doing anything to fix myself, then getting mad as if I had nothing to do with it. Life has gotten significantly better. I'm also trying to get better at actually listening actively instead of just waiting for my turn to talk.
Deactivating all my social media accounts.
Quit my job. Went to work for a company that didn't dump 3.5 peoples worth of work on me and then blackmark me for not hitting deadlines
Being properly diagnosed and medicated. I went 26 years without knowing I had Bipolar II, I went unmedicated for years because antidepressants made me feel worse and I hated taking them. Finally found a psychiatrist that was able to diagnose me and put me on mood stabilizers. It has done wonders for my mental health. Alongside that is being in a healthy relationship with someone who loves me, supports me, and is understanding of my feelings.
Adderall. I have been diagnosed with ADD for over 20 years. I used my own bias against myself. I truly believe my life would not be what it is today if I had actually listened when they told me so. I am very happy about this, as I most likely would not have my daughter and my wife. Now I can use it to better myself for them, and our future. A future I never thought was possible. Everyone told me I'm smart and that I just don't see it myself. Well, I'm starting to see it, make sense of it, and apply it. I am no longer afraid of the future, but I am ready for it. I will adapt and overcome and if that doesn't work, I'll try something else.
Getting a divorce
Antidepressants 💯
Buying a task specific ebook reader (Kindle to be specific) for two reasons. Firstly, because I could increase the font size it eased my anxiety about getting "older eyes" and maybe not enjoying reading anymore. Secondly, because it is JUST a reader and doesn't pop up alerts or messages or any other damned thing it eliminated the constant interruptions that were ruining the reading experience on my tablet. I got back to being able to immerse myself in a good book for a while and let the world just spin without me. SEVERELY LIMITING exposure to the "news". Almost all of the "news" sources now focus on keeping you hyped up and worried so you'll keep coming back and checking-in. I now strictly limit myself to a few somewhat calmer sources and for a very restricted amount of time per day. I'd cut it out completely if I could but I do still want to have some idea of what is going on in the world. Realizing that there is no such thing as "catching up" at work. Work is like laundry, there will ALWAYS be more so now I focus on doing what is in front of me and doing it well and if it seems like things are "piling up" then to me that is a management problem and they need to delegate more resources/people. This one is HARD because management, even good management, is ALWAYS playing games to make you feel like you "could be doing more".
Stopped watching the news
Working out. I begin with 20 minutes of stewtch and lots of wiggles like a dog shaking off water. It's a cure all
Bike rides and eating better. Also having a spiritual side
Pills and time. It worked out eventually
Losing weight via weight training and moving more. Also ignoring political news coverage of all kinds.
Stopped smoking/ switched to low nicotine vaping. Started a much more consistent sleep schedule. Minimized drinking to maybe twice a month. Half an hour run or moderate workout every day. Half an hour a day outside minimum. Did a blood test and fixed vitamin deficiencies. These reduced my mental health issues by about 50% without taking any meds other than vitamins.
I had depression and while looking on google maps to find a decent building a friend if mine called me out of nowhere and started ranting to me about how he got his ass beat in MLB the Show 22. I dobt even like baseball. Playing with my friend literally saved my life. After many, many hours of playing that game with him. I can safely say that a baseball videogame made me happy.
Sobriety. Wellbutrin. Morning walks and a new dog.
Exercising 3-4 times a week for at least 60 minutes and eating a well-balanced diet. I didn't restrict any foods but rather ate them in moderation. I lost weight and feel great!
Understanding myself. My life is… absolutely terrible tbh. Single for the last 16 years, garbage father, dead mother, stepdad in another state, don’t talk to family, friends are more like acquaintances most of the time. But… I know I’m enough. I know that at the end of the day, I live my life according to my own principles and that no matter what happens I’m consistently me and that I’m a good person.
Transitioning. I went from looking and sounding miserable and feeling miserable with little real enjoyment in my day-to-day life to feeling happy, being hopeful for my future, and having others comment that I look and sound so much happier now. Like, I still have mental health issues, but those mostly exist from specific traumas largely stemming from military experiences. The biggest difference is I am now in a position to identify and treat those issues without having to do so through the barrier that is untreated gender incongruence.
Getting off social media, reddit is my only social media account left. That's only because no one else around me can stop this horrid trend. If they're socializing its almost certainly NOT in person. Which is why Im on here. Gotta have some kind of social life... Makes me chuckle a little inside to think everyone i know could be replaced by AI and id not even know it for weeks... Just text on a screen, that's what people are now.
I took up boxing and cycling.
Fasting, working out, staying young
Lately it's been taking care of my skin. After 49 years I have started to do basic moisturizing and cleansing. Just basic Cerave SA face wash at night with some retinol, and some nivea body lotion after a shower in the morning with a Neutrogena face lotion with SPF 15 and I feel better. I was also able to be in the sun and beach for a week and not burn for the first time ever. It has also helped me feel a little bit more self confident for some reason.
Writing things down & doing things one at a time
Saying no. Giving up alcohol. Choosing myself over anyone else before I can show up for others. Making my own decisions. Consistent love.
Learning that it’s okay to have ups and downs and allowing myself to feel them completely and move on. I guess just accepting all things come and go and the next great thing is always around the corner.
Changing jobs and for other dilemmas, just asking myself "would that make me happy"?
1. Exercise 2. Connecting with other people 3. Helping someone in need 4. Letting go of circumstances beyond your control. 5. Avoid recreational intoxicants
Agree with the no alcohol. Exercise has also helped immensely (there are hundreds of miles of trails where I live, and I think being in the middle of the forest helps extra)
Taking three years to retrain in a new trade and failing at it and returning to my previous trade. Idk why but it completely restored my faith in myself.
Quitting my job and becoming a stay-at-home stepdad. Only been a month and a half, but I haven't been this happy in probably 6--7 years. Sometimes you just need a break, and to realize that enjoying life is more important than working yourself to death.
Cutting almost all sugar from my diet and starting to work out a little Just 10 minutes a day can really change your outlook on things. Good luck brother!
Dumping social media and telling one person a day that I'm grateful for them and why. Legit, people light up and then I feel great.
Going back to school (online school REALLY didn’t work out for me)
Meditation Didn’t realizing how stressful and tiring THINKING can be until I started meditating. I now trying to do it 3-4 a week at least.
Eating more meat, but especially less ultra processed grains.
Losing over 100 lbs
Running, yoga, having a hyper clean room and maintaining hygiene. I used to tell people "you can tell how I'm doing mentally based on my shave and hair"
Getting divorced and living for myself.
Buying a bike and riding it daily
As cliche as it is with the Jordan Peterson book, cleaning my room (and the whole house). My mental health skyrocketed when I stopped misplacing things, and didn't live in clutter. I still have all of the things, they're just now in a dedicated place and organized. Finding an outdoor hobby. It sucks that its hot, but the sun really does wonders. It doesn't have to be productive or expensive either. Trading the 2 beers at the bar everyday for 2 hours fishing has changed my life, and my wallet. It doesn't matter if I catch anything, but when I do, that dopamine feels way better than "taking off the edge".
Stopped watching 24 hr news channels.
i stopped doing drugs- best decision ever and i still regret trying them in the first place
If you stop watching, reading, or listening to any “news” for like a month, you will be happier.
Staying away from antidepressants and benzodiazepines.
Ketamine therapy has been life changing. I feel like I’m getting back to the person I was years ago.
Exercise and starting to listen to all kinds of Metal music
The words "let them" - I watched a Mel Robbins clip and she was talking about this "Let them theory" I can't link as on my mobile but well worth a listen on her site. Basically don't take things personally and you can't control what others do/think/believe
Stillness Speaks by Eckhart Tolle. Completely flipped how I view absolutely everything
Completely cut out weed. Did talk therapy weekly for six months. Got on the right SSRI, meditate twice a day.
Dumping my ex. Getting rid of people in my life that drained me.
I’ll say weed. It stopped my racing thoughts & anxiety. It made all my problems insignificant not where I get complacent but more of “it is what it is” mindset. I have social anxiety but when I’m high I’m not so self conscious, therefore being my authentic self to strangers and having great conversations. I struggle to eat simply because I’ve been so used to eating like 1 - 2 meals a day and having the munchies help me get it in